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There are some things I find annoying about being a single Christian person, and I thought I’d write about some of them. I may edit this post in the future as more cross my mind.
Most singles can probably relate to most of this list, but some are specific to me and my views, tastes, preferences, and experiences.
Christian Pundit’s Personal List:
Annoyances As A Christian Single
(in no particular order)
♦ 1. Trite Clichés
The trite, over-used clichés, no matter how “biblical” sounding, are annoying, and actually make me feel worse, not better.
Here are some examples of clichés Christian singles of all ages are exposed to all the time:
- “Singleness is a gift!”
- “Jesus is all you need!”
- “God is your spouse!”
- “Once you’re content with your singleness, then God will send you your spouse”
♦ 2. The ‘Wanting Marriage = Idolatry!’ Opinion
I am annoyed and bewildered by the bizarre, wacko idea held by a small group of Christians that wanting to get married is a form of “idolatry.”
Look, I like chocolate and want to eat the occasional candy bar, but that doesn’t mean I “worship” Hershey’s.
I also don’t like smelling bad, so I take daily showers. I guess in their view wanting to be clean means I’m placing soap and water above my dedication to God?
I do understand that the “marriage mandate” proponents (see the next list item) either elevate marriage to the level of idolatry, or come dangerously close to it, but that’s really no reason to level this charge at any and every Christian single who would very much like to get married.
I read a post on some blog somewhere by a Christian guy who said that he had never been married, but when he turned 40 or 41, he met a woman, fell in love, proposed, and she accepted.
This guy actually dumped the lady at some point afterwards, because, he said, he was concerned he had “made marriage an idol.”
It’s understandable to back out of an engagement if you realize you’re all wrong for the person, they’re wrong for you, or something of that nature, but it’s not understandable in this case, not in my opinion.
No, he didn’t make marriage an idol. What he did was break a commitment to a woman he was pledged to marry.
There’s nothing honorable about forgoing marriage in the name of spiritual purity after you’ve popped the question to a woman and she accepted.
I don’t believe God smiles upon us when we break a promise to someone, especially a promise of that magnitude.
Some of these “marriage = idolatry” types sound to me as though they are engaging in fake piety and spiritual pride, not operating out of a genuine sense of submitting to God.
♦ 3. Marriage Mandate:
‘It’s Your Fault You’re Single – And Being Single is a Sin’
The “marriage mandate” view is not only annoying, but it’s also unbiblical and deeply insensitive.
“Marriage Mandate,” which is the attitude and teaching that being single, especially being single past age 29, is a sin, and it’s your fault if you are single.
I’m curious. Why is the cut off age with some of the MM (Marriage Mandate) crowd twenty nine?
People in ancient, biblical times got married as young as what, 13 or 14, so why don’t these MM folks go all out and insist that age 15 is the cut off limit? Why don’t they argue that all American Christians should get married by age 15?
While the underlying assumption in the Bible appears to be that marriage will be the norm for most (edit: or does it? I’ve since had second thoughts about that), and while the Bible has many positive things to say about marriage, the Bible, (the New Testament in particular), does not categorize singleness, whether it lasts a lifetime or only for a duration, as sin, certainly not for all people for all time in all cultures.
If God has not relegated all forms of singleness to the category of sin (and He has not), I’ve no idea why some Christians believe it’s within their rights to do so.
Jesus condemned the religious leaders of His day for making man-made traditions on par with Biblical laws and Biblical instruction and forcing people to adhere to those traditions as though they were from God Himself.
It looks to me that is precisely the same situation with the “marriage mandate” proponents: they’re trying to force Christians to abide by a teaching that they, and not God, created
(Link): Why Do Churches Treat Singleness Like a Problem? via Relevant Magazine