Double Standard by Some Non Christian Childfree

I wrote about childfree people in a previous entry. I myself am childfree, but I’m also a social conservative, conservative Christian, and a Republican, unlike most CF (child free people) who seem to be left wing and atheist – and who are hostile towards people such as myself.

One glaring double standard I see on CF (child free) blogs and forums are CF Non Christians who complain about mothers who breastfeed. (I agree that breastfeeding should be done in private and not in public.)

Many CF seem to believe there is something sexual about nude breasts, even in the context of breastfeeding; maybe to an extent they are correct about that. (For example see posts in this thread about Time magazine’s breastfeeding cover at Bratfree Forum).

Here are a few quotes from that CF forum thread regarding the Time magazine breastfeeding story:

by loavesstillsuck

THE HORROR! The look of the self-satisfied moos [mothers] standing their with their adult children (well, practically) sucking on their udders. . . . . . . glaring into the camera lens as if to say “I dare you to think of me sexually with a kid sucking off of me!”

BLEAH! There is no word appropriate enough, save for BLEAAAAAAH and VOMMITTTT.

by gwddee

Yeah I noted the ‘lighten up” twit. What the f*uck? Yep, keep defending that pedophile [mother in photo breastfeeding son], assh*le.

by rudegubmintworker

Why can’t the mom pump her breast and give the brat her boob milk from a cup? Because she gets physical and/or sexual satisfaction from it, loves using it to control the brat. Whether she wants to admit it or not.

When I was almost age 4 (like this kid SUPPOSEDLY is) I was in pre-kindergarten and could already read (and had been formula fed). I can’t imagine leaving school where I read, drew numbers and stick figures to go suck on Mom’s tit. Not to mention – some kids even back in the seventies at age 3 and 4 were skilled in the art of teasing other kids. What happens of other kids get wind of the fact Suckley still nurses? He’ll become the victim of bullying.

There are many, many other similar quotes to those above at that site and at other CF sites, who are equating breastfeeding (or the photo of such on the Time cover) to pedophilia.

Many CF, though, do not believe there should be any or many limits on sexuality in other areas, and they don’t seem to spot their own hypocrisy in this.

Many of the Non Christian CF mock and ridicule Christians or conservatives who teach and believe sex should be for marriage only, teens should not be having sex, and that homosexuality is unnatural and sinful.

In this thread at Child Free Life forums about a woman who chose to remain a virgin her whole life, there was (last I read) nothing but posts supportive of this woman’s choice: 70 years old and still a virgin. So that’s good.

However, many posts or threads by Non Christians CF at the CFLF (ChildFree Life) forums insult and ridicule Christians, conservatives, and Republicans who are against abortion, fornication, and homosexuality, or who believe that kids in public schools should be taught Abstinence-only curriculum (or abstinence as an option, or in addition to).

I cannot understand why, when it seems like about 98% of the Non Christian CF at blogs, sites, and forums support fornication completely turn around and all the sudden complain about nude breasts in the context of a mother breastfeeding her baby?

They all recoil at the thought or sight of breastfeeding mothers on Time magazine covers, but they feel dandy with schools handing out condoms to kids, supporting homosexuality, and one 20-something female said on one thread at CFLF that she told her 16 or 17 year old kid sister she ought to get an abortion.

In this thread at CFLF for example, people who I presume are Non Christian and liberal insult conservatives on some of these issues:

Bristol Palin: Expert on parenting and morality…

So, according to those Non Christian, Liberal CF, it’s judgmental and wrong for a young conservative to advise other teens to abstain from sex, but it’s fine and peachy for adult CF to advise and lecture breastfeeding mothers that they shouldn’t be breastfeeding? Pot meet kettle.

I wish these Non Christian/ Liberal CF people could see they’re guilty of being just as judgmental as they believe Christian / Conservatives are at times.

Post Script.

As for another example of inconsistency of when, where, and who of what to judge, there was this conversation between a recently- married CF and a NM (never married) CF, where the NM-CF was passing judgment on the married CF, which angered her and several others in the thread (Brat Free forums):

by schmoopie3928

I’m 36 and just celebrated my 2nd anniversary. 1st marriage. I get bingoed all the time. And to add insult to injury I get the “biological clock” stuff. I’m going to a funeral this week that will be jam packed with extended family. I’m looking so forward to deflecting all the bingo that will be flung in my direction.

reply by entheogen:

At the risk of getting my hind heavily flamed and served on a platter, it occurs to me that you kind of asked for this by getting married. A real relationship shouldn’t require sanctioning by the state, religion or even family. If it is strong enough, it will persist all on its own.
It just seems like a desperate move by fear of being alone or fear of losing something you already feel slipping away. Legally binding yourself to someone to keep the relationship intact sounds awfully similar to having a child to improve the marriage.
I say the bingos you received were no less than you deserved for engaging in the irrelevant ritual of marriage. Or perhaps you shouldn’t frequent so many breeders if you’re in no mood for their taunting?
But that’s just me and I’m probably wrong.
Running for the hills holding a pan over my head.

That post by entheogen engendered several hostile or critical replies, including:

by blue orchid

So…..those who get married are asking for (and deserve to be) bingoed just because they got married? What a crock of sh*t.

by blundy

And entheogens’ list of reasons to get married??? WTF? I think the childfree are a little bit more thoughtful about our life decisions than that. Yes run for the hills tiger cos that logic is right up there with “she was wearing a miniskirt so she was asking to be raped” FFS

Replies by Entheogen:

-That’s not quite what I meant to say.
Many people see getting married as a step in the life script with breeding as the obvious following. I didn’t make it so.
Still marriage, as an institution, a relationship requisite, is indeed a crock of sh*t. But maybe you can present some sound reasons for it.

-Whoa there blundy.
It’s not my reasoning. Just my observations.
Breeders get married, have kids, not necessarily in that order. You already have the marriage thing in common with them which might make it easier for them to assume you intend to join them in breeding as well…
Never mind I guess… Excuse me for interrupting.
I’ll be on my way.

Replies to that:

by LadyLuck

Go f*ck yourself. That is exactly the same kind of parallel you were drawing; it is the idea that a person cannot make a choice without being socially sanctioned simply because “they should have known better”.

Marriage makes a lot of sense simply because it is the easy way to enter into a LEGAL contract to protect your rights in the other person’s life (medical decisions, et al).

Yes, you could draft legal contracts to get the same effect, but marriage is a lot easier than a bunch of separate agreements or one giant nightmare one. None of us (I think) see marriage as a social stamp of approval and thus our reason for entering into it.

You are just as bad as the narrow-minded moom-bie brigade

by happsammy:

Oh, a real relationship. I see. Roll-Eyes As opposed to those ‘pretend’ relationships many of us have. Maybe we only think we’re happy, but really we’re miserable and desperate and don’t realise it.

No-one needs to justify the terms of their relationship to you or anyone else, and it’s insulting in the extreme to suggest that the posters relationship is not ‘real’ because you don’t like the institution of marriage for whatever reason.

You’re just as bad as the f*cking breeders who say that CF relationships aren’t real because if we’d met the ‘right one’ we’d want to have babies with them.

by starlady

Oh geesh, I am in a 35 year mistake! Oh no! hilarious Not that my dh isn’t my best friend, or that I was able to retire early because we have accumulated enough TOGETHER that I was able to do so. The health decisions are a biggie. I mean, I have no family except for DH. Who would decide to ‘pull the plug’? Oh well.. this was just someone wanting to stir up trouble. I have been pretty darn happy with my decision… bingos or not. If it wasn’t haveing kids that people bugged me about… it would always be something else.

Another Reply by Entheogen:

lol, you mad..?
I’ll gladly take heat for pointing out the irrelevance of an outdated and irrational institution that also happens to be intimately linked to another personal pet peeve of mine: organized religion. Which not only offers fodder for every nut job from here to the remotest dusty spot in the Sahara but is also an open and avid supporter of indiscriminate, unreasonable breeding and rat like multiplication of our precious species.
If you’re in love with that special someone? That’s fantastic! My joy for you knows no bounds.
So don’t hate me for pointing out the silliness of getting the government, of all people, involved

[cut the rest of the long, judgmental screed]

There were several replies, including

by Lady Luck

If you oppose the ceremony and the religion why the f-ck didn’t you say that? I don’t want either in my life….EVER! We are going to the courthouse for the LEGAL DOCUMENT signed by the JUDGE with a 15 minute ceremony AS REQUIRED BY LAW and then going to dinner. No God/dess/Jesus/FSM/Invisible Pink Unicorn.

Don’t sh-t all over everyone who wants to get married because of how most people get married without asking first. I don’t think any of us want to go the traditional route or like religion all that much…I’d think that someone who has been around for a year would know that by now.

by happy sammy

Yep, everyone who’s married is EXACTLY like that. You’re some kind of genius who can see into people’s souls.
I shall immediately request a divorce, so that I can be as delightful and satisfied as you. Thumb Wink


You’re a knob that sees people as cardboard cutout caricatures, with stereotypical ideas and motivations, which saves you a great deal of the effort of understanding people as individuals.

by amy NLI

Enthoegen,why would any of us be mad? You are entitled to your opinion.You sound like you’re the mad one,and you also are as ranty as a charging moo hoping to irritate others because misery loves company,but,hey,whatever gets you through another day,I guess

by thecorpseflinger

*shrug* Courthouse and a few weeks later with a few kegs and damned good food for dirt cheap. We wanted to be hitched, we just don’t want crotch droplings. I see no reason to demonize us for our choice. I’m also over 30 and married a younger guy so yeah, sooo wasn’t following the “life script”. We’re happy with our decision, that’s all that matters.

So, as you can see, while many Non-Christian CFs claim to abhor judgments over morality or life choices, they sit around judging each other on those very things.

4 thoughts on “Double Standard by Some Non Christian Childfree”

  1. Excellent post. I’m child free myself, and it makes me cringe when I hear people–especially those who claim to be feminists– making comments such as those you listed in your blog. That’s not what feminism, equality, or childlessness by choice is about, and they make the rest of us look like jerks. I don’t want children, and I won’t pretend that the idea of breast feeding doesn’t ook me out a bit, but…. you know what? That’s what they’re technically for, and I get that. I demand the right to do with my breasts and body what I please, so far be it from me to deny others that same right.

    1. Thank you for leaving your views on the blog! (I’m sorry I did not thank you sooner, but it’s not often I log in at this blog, unless maybe I’m leaving a new post.)

    1. I see what you’re saying, but to me, it’s kind of a distinction without much of a difference, since, if you’re like the childfree people I was discussing in the original post, you are doing what so many of you claim to hate: passing judgment on someone else’s life choice.

      I don’t much care for public breastfeeding, either, but I’m not as vitriolic about it as so many other childfree people are.

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