Article: Why Are So Many Professional Millennial Women Unable To Find Dateable Men?

Why Are So Many Professional Millennial Women Unable To Find Dateable Men?

(Link): Why Are So Many Professional Millennial Women Unable To Find Dateable Men?

I would add that much of this article rings true for Christian women now who are over the age of 35 – although I can’t agree personally with the “they’re still single because they put career before marriage” shtick this article raises; that was not true of myself, nor many other Christian women I’ve come across who wanted to get married but the right guy never showed up.

This “put career before getting a mate” spiel is actually a nasty stereotype that a lot of idiotic conservative Christians throw into the faces of Christian women who are mid-30s or older who wanted marriage but never got married.

I’ve seen this point raised time and again in Christian books or blogs about prolonged singleness whose authors blame Christian women for why they remain single. The fact is, most (Christian) women don’t put career before marriage – for some awful reason I do not grasp, God has refused to provide mates for a hell of a lot of sincere Christian people, despite the fact the Bible says whatever you pray in faith, God will grant you.

Despite that misgiving, I feel that other aspects of this article have some merit. Here’s the article:

(Link): Why Are So Many Professional Millennial Women Unable To Find Dateable Men?

But now, a growing number of Millennial women are beginning to fret over the unanticipated consequences of prioritizing our careers before love. And I only need to look at my group of friends to see this reality. Again and again, year after year, my successful, gorgeous, and amazing friends remain kiss-less on New Year’s Eve.

And on Valentine’s Day. And on the 4th of July. The only dateable men we encounter are either attached, gay, or otherwise involved in “it’s complicated” situations. We are coming to the realization that we were unwittingly playing a game of musical chairs — while everyone was pairing up, those focused on our careers are left standing alone.

And we can’t figure out what is happening.

“I don’t think the issue is that men used to be great and now they’re not,” says Jezebel’s Katie J.M. Baker. “Women used to feel more pressure to get married and have kids earlier, and prioritize those goals above the others.”

Add to that women’s ability now to be self-sufficient financially and supported socially by so many friends in the same boat, it shouldn’t be that surprising so many Millennial women are single. Except to us singletons, it isn’t supposed to be this way.

When it comes to romance, Millennial women are typically described using several broad strokes that don’t reflect nuance or contradictions. We are the hook-up generation. We are afraid of commitment. We are ball-busters or fairy-tale dreamers. Each cliché may have elements of truth, but the fuller story is a result of several influencing and interconnected factors.

For one, it’s not as if we are holding out for Jake Gyllenhaal, but we do have certain non-negotiable expectations for potential mates that include college degrees and white-collar jobs. Life has always gone according to our plans, so why wouldn’t we land a man with these (reasonable) requirements?

This unwillingness to settle for less than we think we deserve is joined by a lax attitude towards searching for potential mates.

We’re busy dominating the world. We don’t have time to hang out at bars. While some of us explore online dating or take a more proactive approach, the majority of Millennial women have long assumed we would meet Prince Charming via friends, or through their own social circles.

Unfortunately these assumptions bump up against the growing inequality between the two genders. Millennial women have taken it for granted that they will pair up with equal partners.

But increasingly, there aren’t enough of these men to go around. Women now outnumber men on college campuses, and single, childless women out earn their male counterparts.

In fact, as author Liza Mundy writes in her book, The Richer Sex, Millennial women are increasingly finding two options when it comes to romance: marry down or don’t marry.

“There needs to be a cognitive behavior change in what are [considered] important traits,” says Mundy. “I talk to so many women who are obsessed with finding men on their level. They want someone as ambitious, engaged, and high-achieving as they are. They maybe need to rethink that to seek a partner who is supportive, rather than competitive.”

Read the rest of the article:
(Link): Why Are So Many Professional Millennial Women Unable To Find Dateable Men?

Related posts:

(Link): Just Say No – For white working-class women, it makes sense to stay single mothers. (Not enough eligible single men for women to marry) by N. Cahn and J. Carbone

(Link):  The Millennial Caregiver – from WSJ
(some singles are staying single longer than they hoped or planned because they are caregivers for elderly family)

(Link): Over 10 Million Men of Prime Working Age Are Unemployed in the US and Experts Think It’s Causing Declining Marriage Rates

(Link): Do Millennial Men Want Stay-at-Home Wives?

(Link): Number of ‘Lonely, Single’ Men is on the Rise as Women with Higher Dating Standards Look for Partners Who are ‘Emotionally Available, Good Communicators, and Share Similar Values’, Says Psychologist

(Link): Times Men Did Something So Annoying [on Dates or Dating Sites], It Made Women Ghost Them Instantly

(Link): The best age to marry is when you meet the right person – editorial responding to study that says if you marry past 30 your marriage is doomed

(Link): Young Single Women Try to Appear Less Ambitious To Attract A Mate – via WSJ

(Link): Single Women Are Outpacing Men in Homeownership by A. Diaz

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