Church’s Bizarre Sermon To Singles About Singlehood – With Spiderman Theme
I think they used parts of a video by another church or Christian group in this, after the super hero intro. There is a link to the video here, and it should be embedded farther below in this post.
Here is my review of this sermon / video as I am watching it (and it is a slooow video to download, geeze):
The preacher dresses in a Spider Man costume at the start, which I don’t understand; I don’t get what Spiderman or superheroes have to do with singleness.
The wife of the pastor explains to the congregation how they met and hooked up, while he goes off stage to change out of his costume into jeans and a shirt.
I actually find these ‘how we met and got married’ type things depressing. I won’t give a damn how “Mrs. Jones” met “Mr. Jones” until I get a Mr. Jones of my own, thank you very much. These cutesy couple stories about ‘how we met’ are not encouraging to me the older I get. They are reminders that I’m still unmarried, so I’d rather not hear them.
At least the preacher recognizes that there are a lot of singles in American culture now, and says it’s okay being single. He mentions that up to 44% of Americans today are single. Most preachers still remain oblivious to the fact that close to half the US adult population is single.
Preacher dude says he thinks “God has a person for you,” you better “ask God to be your hitch [match maker],” and, he says, you better, “ask God for that person [your future spouse]”. Uh yeah, I tried all that fella, and I am still never- married in my early 40s.
(click the “read more” link below to read the rest)
It’s odd that the preacher should give that sort of advice, because at the start of the video, when his wife was telling how they met, she said nada- didley- nothing about how they came to be in regards to God.
She said she saw her husband on the stage prior to their being married when they were younger, got a crush on him, and spent the next number of X years chasing after him and flirting with him. She said nothing in her testimony about “praying and asking God to send her the right guy,” and she said nothing about “getting God’s input” or “leading,” etc.
Preacher guy says in this video that marriage is a big decision – why yes, yes it is. That may be one reason I’ve stayed single as long as I have, I take marriage a hella lot more serious than most, at least up until about a year ago.
But – these days- I also believe in divorce. I really do, I think it is a viable option. If your marriage is not working – your pig of a spouse is neglecting you emotionally, you fall out of love, he’s abusive, whatever – you dump him.
Life is too short to be spent married to someone who is making your life hell, or for you to go thru life un-fulfilled. With the divorce rate being about 50% these days, I’m not alone in this thinking.
At one point, preacher suggests in this video sermon if you are a single woman praying for a husband, but are still single, it is because you “put God on the shelf” and are “dating like a worldly woman, breaking every relationship rule.”
That is a bunch of horseshit, too. This preacher should not presume to tell singles why they are still single; all he can do is guess and speculate. He does not know for a fact why anyone is still single.
I was engaged to a guy in my 30s that I began dating in my late 20s, and we did not have sex (I would assume that is what this preacher man means by ‘dating like a worldly woman.’) My ex was not particularly good looking, and he was rather stupid. He did not have a college education, either, nor a lot of money. I was certainly not dating my ex in a “worldly way”.
The preacher in the video says to date “the Bible way.” What is the “Bible way?” The Bible does not say how Americans in 2013 are to date.
Now the preacher is advising singles that if they want to meet a godly single, to stay away from places such as “Hooters,” and he suggests heavy involvement in church. Buddy, if you walk into most churches, there are hardly any singles, especially if you are a 40 year old single woman.
Both my parents lectured me constantly when I was growing up (in particular my mom) to go to church to meet a man. I used to honestly believe that. And I tried. There are NO SINGLE MEN PAST AGE 30 AT MOST CHURCHES.
Preacher guy admits earlier in the video that in Abraham’s, and other Old Testament people’s day, people did not date, they did arranged marriages, yet strangely, he keeps using Isaac’s arranged marriage, and how Isaac wants to “find the right girl” as an example for American Christian singles to follow.
The preacher is now spending a long time discussing Rebecca drawing water for the servant of what’s his face’s camels. He quotes the bit about the servant watching her quietly and tangents into this thing about how a man should quietly listen to a woman as she talks as they are dating.
Then he gets into how you should not marry quickly; you should date for a long, long time before you marry. Don’t marry someone after just three dates. How the hell this preacher is getting all this out of the watering- the- camels story I dunno.
Now he’s saying camel water girl (Rebecca?) comes from a “God loving” family, and she is a “God loving” person. From this, he gets into the Bible saying, “Christians are to marry other Christians.”
Again, dude, there are more single Christian women than there are single Christian males, as you yourself acknowledged earlier in the video: you said for every 100 Christian single women, there are only 89 single Christian men available. So it looks to me as though the remainder of the ladies will have no choice but to marry Non-Christian men, unless they are peachy with staying single until they die.
The males are not going to churches. Some “Christian males” are porn addicts, rapists, verbally or physically abusive, etc, as I have blogged about before.
There are some perfectly warm, loving Non Christian men out there. If I keep waiting for “Mr. Christian Right” to show up, I may never, ever marry. So forget any biblical prohibitions against a Christian marrying a non-believer, that is not going to work for me, or many other single women from a Christian background like me.
He’s saying Rebecca is kind, polite, hard working, and thoughtful. Gee buddy, so was I! Did not get me a spouse. I am past 40 now.
He’s now saying marriage is a lot of hard work. (He jumped off this point from mentioning that watering camels is hard work.) He’s telling the men to get a job and work hard.
Now he’s talking about virginity. He’s saying if you are an adult you may have made a few sexual mistakes, both singles and marrieds. He says he’s not there to judge you. Ask God to forgive you if you have slept around.
Well honey, no penis has ever been in my vagina, but it did not get me a spouse. God does not reward virgins with spouses. Try again.
Now the pastor is mentioning that God invented sex. He’s saying Christians are not “casual about sex.” Sex should be within marriage.
The preacher is saying again Rebecca was a virgin and “sexually pure,” and that God still expects people today to be that way too. He says read Genesis again and notice that there was a lot of sexual sin recorded, but Rebecca was counter-cultural for being pure.
The preacher says Christians take cues about sex from God’s Word, not secular culture. I disagree. What the pastor says is the ideal, but a lot of churches today have in fact been influenced by secular culture’s views about sex, which I have blogged about before.
The preacher doesn’t think married people commit sexual sin; he calls them out for sins of anger, etc. The fact is a lot of married people have extra-marital affairs and look at dirty web sites, including Christian married people (I have blogged about that before, with links to sources about porn usage among married Christians, news stories about married Christian men who killed their wives).
Preacher is now mentioning that the biblical text says that Rebecca is “beautiful.” At least the preacher is now acknowledging at this point of the sermon that some women listening to him may want a physically attractive man to marry. He does not knock the women for wanting a hot, sexy man. He gets my applause on that one. Very rare for a male Christian to realize women WANT HOT MEN. We ladies are visually wired, thank you.
The preacher also says he is not saying you have to be a model to get a spouse. His point is just you should try to look your best for you.
By the end of the video the pastor is telling singles not to put their lives on hold until they get married.
Up to that point of the video, things are fairly decent, but then he has to tell us about his wedding day, in great detail, of how thrilled he was to see his wife walk down the aisle in her wedding dress.
That is a disrespectful way to end a sermon for singles, in my view. I may never get married, dude. I don’t need to hear about how awesomely happy your life is once you got married, it’s like pouring salt into an open wound. He tries to compare that story of seeing his wife on his wedding day to “this is how God feels about you when he looks at you.” ~Yeah, that doesn’t cheer me up.
Here is the video: