Why Comic Characters and Super Heroes Can’t Marry – Marriage Makes People Selfish

Why Comic Characters and Super Heroes Can’t Marry – Marriage Makes People Selfish

Some feminist blogs, which tend to lean frothing- at- the- mouth in support of all things homosexuality, are upset about this recent Bat Woman comic character development. In the current iteration of the Bat Woman saga, the comic writers have made the character a lesbian and will not be writing a storyline in which she marries her girlfriend.

(Link): Batwoman Can’t Marry, Says DC Pub, Because Heroes Can’t Be Happy
from Jezebel, secular feminist blog (Jezebel writers totally need to shut up about about “slut shaming,” btw, or re-define it – see (Link): On Miley Cyrus Being Sexual at 2013 VMAs – Hypocrisy of Secular Feminists)

One would think a feminist blog would be anti-marriage, since they tend to view hetero-sexual marriage as oppressive for women, but since secular feminists tend to be left wing and very politically correct, it figures, in a weird and hypocritical way, they would make an exception in the case of a lesbian character, and want to see a lesbian get married to a woman.

(Link): DC Says Batwoman Can’t Marry Because “Heroes Shouldn’t Have Happy Personal Lives”

The comics guys in charge of writing Bat Woman stories explained keeping Bat Woman single is because a super hero’s job is to sacrifice personal happiness for the sake of the greater good, defending society.

This explanation rings hollow to feminist writers, but it makes sense.

In reading about singleness by Christian authors, some of them make the same point: not only do they discuss super hero mythos and explain that a hero must choose between dedicating himself to One (i.e., a romantic partner) rather than to the many, but the Christian authors of one book about singlehood provided real life examples of how singles tend to be more giving and less selfish than their married counterparts.

In one book by Christian authors about singleness, the authors re-tell a true life account of a group of families held as prisoners of war in a cramped camp.

The authors tell of how when the overseers of the camp ask the families, who started out with two rooms in their living quarters, were asked to sacrifice one room for newcomers, the families refused.

The families claimed they needed the extra space for their flesh and blood ties.

At that same camp (at least I believe it was the same one; it was a prisoner of war camp), though, a celibate priest – a single guy, he was UN-married – would make the rounds in the camp, visiting everyone, making sure everyone was doing okay, and providing friendship and companionship to anyone who was lonely or alone.

This single man, this unmarried man, put the needs of those around him ahead of himself, and he had no wife or children or other family to worry about or take care of; he had no family to use as an excuse to shirk his duties to helping other people who are not related to him.

There is most certainly a contrast there: married people do tend to turn inwards and care only about their flesh- and- blood ties, even ones who claim to be dedicated Christians. I have copied writings by other authors to this blog before about the same issue, such as:

(Link): Do You Rate Your Family Too High?

(Link): Mormons and Christians Make Family, Marriage, Having Children Into Idols

(Link): The Greedy Marriage

      Sept 2007

    By Chris Berdik

  • More precisely, marriage can be greedy, according to Naomi Gerstel of the University of Massachusetts at Amherst and Natalia Sarkisian of Boston College, who have written a paper called “Marriage: the Good, the Bad, and the Greedy.”
  • Analyzing two nationwide social surveys, they found that married couples spend less time than singles calling, writing, and visiting with their friends, neighbors, and extended family. According to their research, married people are also less likely to give friends and neighbors emotional support and practical help, such as with household chores.
  • Gerstel and Sarkisian’s research flies in the face of recent academic studies and political speeches arguing that marriage is the endangered cornerstone of a healthy society, benefiting the mental, physical, and financial well-being of children and adults, and, ultimately, their fellow citizens. They argue that marriage may actually, albeit unwittingly, have just the opposite effect – sapping the strength of American communities and diminishing our ability to think and act for the common good.
  • “Many, bemoaning the retreat from marriage, also mourn the loss of community,” they wrote in the Fall 2006 issue of Contexts, a journal of the American Sociological Association. “What these nostalgic discussions do not recognize, ironically, is that marriage and community are often at odds with one another.”

(Link): The greedy marriage – Two scholars argue that good spouses can make bad neighbors

(Link): Daily Beast: Are Married People More Selfish Than Singles?

      You Never Call Me

    Jun 28, 2008 1:44 PM EDT

  • Parents should think twice before pushing their children toward the altar. According to “Marriage: The Good, the Bad and the Greedy,” a paper published by the American Sociological Association, married people are significantly less likely than the unmarried to visit their parents and siblings. Only 60 percent surveyed admitted contacting their parents in the past month, as compared with 80 percent of never-married respondents.
  • Only 30 percent said they’d socialized with friends in the same period, in contrast to 70 percent of unmarrieds.
  • The silver lining? Married couples are asking less of others: from 1985 to 2004, the number of people they confided in dropped by one third, while the amount of deep discussion with their spouses rose. Here’s to wedded bliss—and isolation.
  • From the New York Times (One’s A Crowd), which provides further material proving the many singles are more usually more socialable and out-ward focused than married couples:
  • Compared with their married counterparts, single people are more likely to spend time with friends and neighbors, go to restaurants and attend art classes and lectures.

  • There is much research suggesting that single people get out more — and not only the younger ones.
  • Erin Cornwell, a sociologist at Cornell, analyzed results from the General Social Survey (which draws on a nationally representative sample of the United States population) from 2000 to 2008 and found that single people 35 and older were more likely than those who lived with a spouse or a romantic partner to spend a social evening with neighbors or friends.
  • In 2008, her husband, Benjamin Cornwell (also a sociologist at Cornell), was lead author of “The Social Connectedness of Older Adults,” a paper in the American Sociological Review that showed that single seniors had the same number of friends and core discussion partners as their married peers and were more likely to socialize with friends and neighbors.
  • SURVEYS, some by market research companies that study behavior for clients developing products and services, also indicate that married people with children are more likely than single people to hunker down at home. Those in large suburban homes often splinter into private rooms to be alone. The image of a modern family in a room together, each plugged into a separate reality, be it a smartphone, computer, video game or TV show has become a cultural cliché.

Excerpts from (Link): Do You Rate Your Family Too High? (Christians Who Idolize the Family) (article) by Ben Patterson

    The current focus on the family [and marriage] continually misses this crucial point. The most sacrosanct reason that can now be given for turning down a position of service in the church is that “It would take away time I need to give to my family.” Say that, and the discussion is over, the question is laid to rest, and mouths are shut.

  • Another question I have is “Where does the world fit into this order of priorities?” More than once the command to go into all the world and make disciples has put a strain on family life. So has the call to be hospitable to strangers, visit the sick, feed the hungry, and clothe the naked.
  • But today, Christians can avoid those problematic areas of discipleship in the name of sustaining the family life. It is becoming increasingly easy to justify extravagant expenditures on vacations, recreational vehicles, land home improvements because it helps to build up the family.
  • The truth of the matter is that the family has become a convenient excuse for turning our backs on other people. We want to be left alone to cultivate our own little patch of ground, and we baptize that desire by appealing to an alleged God-ordained set of priorities. There is nothing distinctly Christian about a strong family. Buddhists have them, secular humanists have them, and, I presume, even the Mafia has them.
  • I also have a question about where single people fit into all of this. Nearly one-third of our population will be single by 1987 [by 2013, that figure has gone up to 44% – that is, 44% of Americans over the age of 18 are single – as of fall of 2014, over 50% of the American population is single see this link].
  • If churches reflect this demographic in the least, a substantial number of Christians will find themselves outside the most acceptable arena for discipleship. Many do now.
  • By the Apostle Paul, in the New Testament of the Bible:
  • 1 Corinthians 7
  • If you marry, however, you do not sin, nor does an unmarried woman sin if she marries; but such people will experience affliction in their earthly life, and I would like to spare you that.

  • I should like you to be free of anxieties. An unmarried man is anxious about the things of the Lord, how he may please the Lord.
  • 33 But a married man is anxious about the things of the world, how he may please his wife
  • 34 and he is divided. An unmarried woman or a virgin is anxious about the things of the Lord, so that she may be holy in both body and spirit. A married woman, on the other hand, is anxious about the things of the world, how she may please her husband.
  • 35 I am telling you this for your own benefit, not to impose a restraint upon you, but for the sake of propriety and adherence to the Lord without distraction.

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Related posts this blog:

(Link): Inconsistency Strikes Secular Feminist Site Jezebel Again: Comic Characters, Marriage, and Sex Shaming (Jezebel writers want Bat Girl to marry, but not Bat Man)

(Link): The Contemporary Church Undervalues Celibacy / Virginity

(Link): On Miley Cyrus Being Sexual at 2013 VMAs – Hypocrisy of Secular Feminists

(Link): Do Married Couples Slight Their Family Members as Well as Their Friends? / “Greedy Marriages”