Goodbye to romance: Are rom-coms worse than porn? (How Hollywood Feeds Into People’s Tendency to Idolize Marriage and Turn a Spouse Into a Deity)

Goodbye to romance: Are rom-coms worse than porn? (How Hollywood Feeds Into People’s Tendency to Idolize Marriage and Turn a Spouse Into a Deity)

Good editorial, but the author neglects to mention that the church, Christian culture, also feeds into this hyping of romantic love and marriage and makes anyone who does not marry by age 25 or 30 into a second class citizen.

The author also fails to mention how many Christian males expect their Christian wives to have big boobs, long blonde hair, be perpetually 25 years old, and perform like porn stars in the bedroom each night; Christian men too walk into relationships with women with faulty, Hollywood-fed fantasies and mythology, it’s not just the females who have “unrealistic expectations.”

(Link) Goodbye to romance: Are rom-coms worse than porn?

Excerpt:

    by Matt K Lewis

    “I once loved a girl who almost loved me, but not as much as she loved John Cusack.” – Chuck Klosterman

    Anyone who has seen the trailer for the new movie Don Jon knows that Jon (Joseph Gordon-Levitt), really cares about his porn. Fewer know that his love interest, Barbara (Scarlett Johansson), is likewise addicted to the sappy fairy tales we call romantic comedies.

    I like the juxtaposition. Both things can be destructive. But while porn has a bad reputation, those who peddle unrealistic notions about love and marriage and relationships get a pass.

    One wonders which of these fantasies have done the most damage to families.

    In his 1973 book called The Denial of Death, cultural anthropologist Ernest Becker explains why we developed this modern notion of romance — why we imagine that finding that special someone will magically make everything right in the world.

    In short, he argues it’s because we no longer look to the Almighty for our personal fulfillment. Instead, “[m]odern man fulfills his urge to self expansion in the love object just as it was once fulfilled in God.”

    We’re always looking for that perfect person whom (we think) will fill that gaping hole in our soul. We tell ourselves: “If I could just date/marry/whatever her, then everything would be perfect.”

    When we find this person, we deify them. For a time.

    And popular culture only reinforces this notion, via movies and music. Unlike porn, this fantasy isn’t discouraged by polite society, and is, in fact, often celebrated.

    Sadly, the end result is a world full of people seeking fulfillment in other human beings who, being imperfect, eventually let them down.