More Anti-Singleness Bias From Southern Baptist Al Mohler – Despite the Bible Says It Is Better Not To Marry
I guess Al Mohler must know better than the Apostle Paul, who wrote,
Now to the unmarried and the widows I say: It is good for them to stay unmarried, as I do (1 Corinthians)
— end quote —
Here is another Mohler hit piece on singleness (hyping marriage to the detriment of singleness, which God never does in the Bible):
(Link): Two Is Better Than One—Who Knew? – from October 4, 2013
Brief excerpt from Mohler’s page:
- Nevertheless, married women also survive longer than unmarried women with the same disease. Even husbands really help. Single patients are far more vulnerable.
All this is testimony to the power of marriage, and to the fact that marriage is one of the greatest gifts God has given his human creatures.
I believe Mohler has several other obnoxious articles against singleness at his blog, that is but one.
Some of Mohler’s contentions about married people living longer and being happier have been refuted by Bella DePaulo (and by others); please see these sites:
(Link): Debunking the Myth that Married People Live Longer
(Link): Living Single
(DePaulo’s blog on Psychology Today where she frequently refutes erroneous ideas about singles and singlehood)
(Link): All Things Single (and More)
(From another source):
(Link): Unmarried and Childless Women Are the Happiest, Happiness Expert Claims (2019 Study)
By the way, where the Bible says “two is better than one,” that is not exclusive to a martial relationship only.
That phrase can refer to a brother and sister, a grandmother to her grandchild, a neighbor to another, a co-worker to another co-worker at a job, or two platonic friends.
Jesus Christ explicitly taught that placing marriage, “traditional family,” and pro-creating above the family of God is sin, and it is also misplaced, and it needlessly excludes singles (the never married adults, the divorced, the widows and widowers), and those without flesh and blood family-
Jesus Christ said:
- “Anyone who loves their father or mother more than me is not worthy of me” (Matthew 10)
“For I have come to turn
“‘a man against his father,
a daughter against her mother,
a daughter-in-law against her mother-in-law—
a man’s enemies will be the members of his own household.” (Matthew 10: 34-36)
“If any man come to Me and hate not his father and mother, and wife and children, and brethren and sisters, yea, and his own life also, he cannot be My disciple. (Luke 14:26)
He replied to him, “Who is my mother, and who are my brothers?” 49 Pointing to his disciples, he said, “Here are my mother and my brothers. 50 For whoever does the will of my Father in heaven is my brother and sister and mother.” (Matthew 12:46-50)
I guess Mohler is totally unacquainted with the Bible.
He, like many other conservative Christians, needs to repent of making an idol out of marriage, of having children, of the 1950s nuclear family ideal, and for his blatant shaming and degradation of singleness.
He and other Southern Baptists also need to repent of the youth worship: the non-stop fixation on the teens and twenty-somethings.
I used to be a Christian teen and twenty-something and find myself quite possibly walking away from the Christian faith in my 40s, due in part to the youth worship that goes on in Southern Baptist churches (they do not care about middle aged or senior adults), and how singles (or singleness itself) are shamed, treated with scorn, or else ignored.
Mohler also incorrectly assumes (based on other comments he’s made I’ve seen in the past) that a lot of singles are intentionally remaining single: this is false.
Many of us had hoped to marry, but there (Link): were not enough single Christian men to marry, so we singles either stay single or marry Non-Christians.
As I have explained on older posts (but will not belabor here), all this harping on “rah rah, marriage is great!” (as well as gender complementarian) rhetoric is actually perpetuating protracted singleness among Christians of all ages, even among the ones who desire marriage.
Ironically, if churches supported singles and singlehood (and gender egalitarianism), more of us would be getting married.
If the Mohlers of the Christian world truly gave a damn about marriage, they would be helping singles, not disparaging singles or singlehood.
Helping singles and respecting singleness, as well as respecting celibacy in the unmarried who are past the age of 30, would help more singles get married, it would cut down on sexual sin (even among the married Christians), and it would also put a huge dent in the strides pro- homosexuality advocates have made in Christian culture, which troubles the hetero- marriage- worshippers so. These facts keep sailing right over their heads, however.
Responses to Mohler (or like-minded) by Christians, including singles:
(Link): Singleness a Sin? by Camerin Courtney
(Link): In Response To … Al Mohler on Singleness and Childlessness
(Link): Article: 30 And Single? It’s Your Own Fault
(Link): Have We [conservative Christians, Baptists, evangelicals] Said Too Much? (About Marriage, that is)
Apparently Mohler believes job discrimination against the unmarried is ethical and “Christian” too; see this page:
From Single and Sane Blog:
(Link): The Single Pastor
Related posts, this blog:
(Link): Southern Baptist Al Mohler Intimates That Childless And Childfree Adults Are Not Human (2019) – and He Thinks This is a Good and Biblical Worldview
(Link): If the Family Is Central, Christ Is Not
(Link): Fewer Americans Think Marriage is Needed To Create Strong Families, New Poll Suggest
(Link): Unmarried and Childless Women Are the Happiest, Happiness Expert Claims (2019 Study)
(Link): Women Who Stay Single or Get Divorced Are Healthiest by B. DePaulo
(Link): Please Stop Shaming Me for Being Single by J. Vadnal
(Link): “Who is my mother and who are my brothers?” – one of the most excellent Christian rebuttals I have seen against the Christian idolatry of marriage and natalism, and in support of adult singleness and celibacy – from CBE’s site
(Link): James the Single 40-Something Guy Asks 700 Club’s Pat Robertson Why Churches Don’t Help Singles
(Link): Cathy The Single Woman Asks Pat Robertson Why God Has Not Replied to Her Prayers for Years to Send Her a Spouse
(Link): Never-Married Adult Man Named Stephen Asks Christian Host Why God Has Not Answered His 3-Decades Long Prayers To Send Him A Wife
(Link): Another Christianity Today Magazine Editorial (2019) Expects Single Women To Meet the Needs of Married Women – Christians Never Ask the Reverse
(Link): Preacher Says in Sermon that Single Men Who Play Video Games Are Losers Who Have Retarded Spirits and This Creates Dating Problems for Women
(Link): Salvation Army Bans Duggar / Quivering Cult’s ‘Retreat’ (Called ‘Get Them Married’) that Promoted Arranged Marriages for Teen Girls – Quivering Advocates Are Anti-Adult Singleness and Anti-Celibacy
(Link): How the Dating Scene Became Stacked Against Women – via CT, by Gina Dalfonzo
(Link): 60 Year Old, Never- Married Woman Asks Christian TV Host Pat Robertson If Some Are Just Not Meant to Marry
(Link): Man / Husband Shortage in Hong Kong – just like in American Christian circles
(Link): What Two Religions Tell Us About the Modern Dating Crisis (from TIME) (ie, Why Are Conservative Religious Women Not Marrying Even Though They Want to Be Married. Hint: It’s a Demographics Issue)
(Link): Christian Blogger About Divorce, Pastor Andrew Webb, Thinks All To Most Mid-Life Never – Married or Single – Again Adults Are Mal-Adjusted, Ugly Losers Who Have Too Much Baggage
(Link): Preachers and Christian Media Personalities: Re: Marriage – You’re missing the point stop trying to argue or shame singles into getting married
(Link): When Adult Virginity and Adult Celibacy Are Viewed As Inconvenient or As Impediments [by Christians]
(Link): Ever Notice That Christians Don’t Care About or Value Singleness, Unless Jesus Christ’s Singleness and Celibacy is Doubted or Called Into Question by Scholars?
(Link): Conservative Christians Are Now Blaming Homosexual Marriage on Heterosexual Single Adults
(Link): Douglas Wilson and Christian Response FAIL to Sexual Sin – No Body Can Resist Sex – supposedly – Re Celibacy
(Link): Yes, Some Women Use and Look at Pornography (including Christian ones)
(Link): Why So Much Fornication – Because Christians Have No Expectation of Sexual Purity
(Link): Do You Rate Your Family Too High? (Christians Who Idolize the Family) (article)
(Link): Christian Response FAIL to Sexual Sin – Easy Forgivism
(Link): The Myth of the Gift – Regarding Christian Teachings on Gift of Singleness and Gift of Celibacy
(Link): Superman, Man Candy -and- Christian Women Are Visual And Enjoy Looking At Built, Hot, Sexy Men
(Link): No, Christians and Churches Do Not Idolize Virginity and Sexual Purity (Many Christians Actually -Disrespect- Virginity, Celibacy, Sexual Purity)
(Link): Married (Christian) People Aren’t More Virtuous Than Christian Singles
(Link): There is No Such Thing as a Gift of Singleness or Gift of Celibacy or A Calling To Either One
(Link): Family as “The” Backbone of Society? – It’s Not In The Bible
(Link): Christian Double Standards on Celibacy – Hetero Singles Must Abstain from Sex but Not Homosexual Singles
(Link): Christian Teachings on Relationships: One Reason Singles Are Remaining Single (even if they want to get married)
(Link): Anti Virginity Editorial by Christian Blogger Tim Challies – Do Hurt / Shame Feelings or Sexual Abuse Mean Christians Should Cease Supporting Virginity or Teaching About Sexual Purity
(Link): Are Most Churches Too Judgemental About Sexual Sin? (of the hetero variety)
(Link): Salvation By Marriage Alone – The Over Emphasis Upon Marriage by Conservative Christians Evangelicals Southern Baptists
(Link): Want To But Can’t – The One Christian Demographic Being Continually Ignored by Christians Re: Marriage
(Link): Fatherhood Not Quite the Producer of Manly, Mature, Godly Men Some Conservative Christians Make It Out To Be
(Link): Why Unmarried – Single Christians Should Be Concerned about the Gender Role Controversy
(Link): Christians Who Attack Virginity Celibacy and Sexual Purity – and specifically Russell D. Moore and James M. Kushiner
(Link): Southern Baptist Theological Seminary Leader Al Mohler Makes Tacky, Crass Sex Joke on Twitter
(Link): Christian Males Blaming their Unwanted Protracted Singleness on Feminism – They have the wrong target
(Link): The Netherworld of Singleness for Some Singles – You Want Marriage But Don’t Want to Be Disrespected or Ignored for Being Single While You’re Single
(Link): How About Using Celibates as Role Models For Celibacy? (Oddity: Christians Holding Up Non-Virgins [Fornicators] As Being Experts or Positive Examples on Sexual Purity)
(Link): Conservative Christianity Stuck in 1950s Leave it To Beaver-ville
(Link): Pastor Busted in Prostitution Sting – If Married Sex So Great Why Do So Many Married Christian Men Have Affairs
(Link): New Study Released: Cheaters: More American Married Women Admit to Adultery (links)
(Link): Un Happy Mother’s Day – universal church continues to worship parenthood, family
(Link): Grandma Smashes Infant Granddaughter to Death with SledgeHammer, Slits Infant’s Throat – Motherhood Does Not Make Women More Mature, Godly
(Link): Why all the articles about being Child Free? On Being Childfree or Childless – as a Conservative / Right Wing / Christian
(Link): Motherhood Does Not Make Women More Godly or Mature – another example – (Mother Suffocates New Born and Shoves It In Toilet)
(Link): Focus on the Family Members Practice Infidelity or Homosexuality and Get Divorced and Remarry – links to exposes
Articles / editorials on other sites:
(Link): Excellent Article by J. Watts: The Scandal of Singleness – singles / never married christian
2 thoughts on “More Anti Singleness Bias From Al Mohler – Despite the Bible Says It Is Better Not To Marry”
I’m so confused on this topic. On one side I agree that our fight with radical feminism (not feminism in itself which seeks to give women equal rights, but the extremism against men you see nowadays) should be regaining traditional values and pay attention to our families but being asexual ( no libido) as I do leaves me feeling I have no say other than marry and procreate? People like me and you are not represented because we are the minority and therefore there are no guidelines in these books for the marriage less who are not feminists. Some days I feel so crushed by society….
Hello. Thank you for the comments.
I’m not sure if you meant to reply to this post, or one of my posts on secular feminism?
Yes, asexuals and celibate, never married adults are definitely overlooked in a lot of churches and Christian culture. When we are acknowledged (on rare occasions), we are usually on the receiving end of false assumptions or negative stereotypes.
I made a post at this blog a few months ago about asexuality you might find interesting:
(Link): Asexuals and Asexuality
Comments are closed.