How Can Churches Treat Singles Better? By Embracing Celibacy (by J. Boulmay)

How Can Churches Treat Singles Better? By Embracing Celibacy (by J. Boulmay)

I agree with some parts of this post, maybe not all:

(Link): How Can Churches Treat Singles Better? By Embracing Celibacy (by J. Boulmay)


    They [churches/ Christians] don’t have to come out and say that they don’t value celibacy. All you really have to do is look at how they treat the single Christians in their community, and you’ll have your answer. Forgetting that Jesus was a single man and that Paul once write a God-inspired passage telling the Corinthian church that it was better to remain unmarried, churches instead treat singleness as a condition that they’re not entirely sure why God would allow to persist for as long as He has–but they’re certain that He’s going to “cure” it someday, with a little help from the church matchmakers, of course.

Comment I left on the page (comment is awaiting moderation):

    You might want to visit my blog. I discuss this issue a lot.

    Many evangelical, conservative seeker friendly, and Baptist churches are utterly obsessed with sex – as well as with marriage and children.

    I am afraid this grotesque idolatry of marriage and parenthood by American Christians is not going to change, despite the fact the Bible places equal worth and value on singleness and being childfree / childless.

    I have one blog post on my own blog pointing out that one of the few times Christians get worked up over defending celibacy and singlehood is when….

    1. when that of Jesus Christ’s singlehood / celibacy is under attack by liberal scholars, who write books or novels putting forth the notion that Jesus was married and had children.

    2. when people under the age of 25 are under consideration.
    You will notice that churches offer next to no commentary, and certainly no support, for anyone past age 25 / 30 who is still single. Most Christians either assume if you have not already had sex by age 25, that *you will be* engaging in fornication by your early or mid 30s.
    Most Christians cannot even conceive of anyone being celibate or a virgin past age 30.

    Christians assume all singles are having pre- marital sex. They assume only a tiny, itty bitty number of people have been “gifted by God” with super powers to remain celibate.

    (That is right, most Christians misunderstand the topic: celibacy is possible by every one and anyone; it is merely a matter of will power and choice. Celibacy has nothing to do with special gifts of powers bestowed by God. It is a self discipline possible by every body.)

    In spite of the fact that 44% of the American adult population is single, most churches continue to act as though every one marries by the age of 25 and has three children. Churches, Christians, and preachers either have not noticed that more people are remaining single longer, of they do not care.

    Not that I am entirely opposed to some of the solutions you put forth, but – I for one do think that churches should act as ‘match makers’ for Christians who desire marriage and who would welcome the help in that area.

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