9 Reasons ‘Hookup Culture’ Hurts Boys Too (article)

9 Reasons ‘Hookup Culture’ Hurts Boys Too

You’ll have to visit their page if you want to see all nine reasons.

(Link): 9 Reasons ‘Hookup Culture’ Hurts Boys Too, TIME magazine

    Boys get hurt as much as, if not more than, girls

    By Ryan Sager
    Nov. 22, 2013

    … During two years of research, she interviewed hundreds of boys across the country — individually, in groups, over the course of extended e-mail correspondences — and their stories are really quite striking.

    As Wiseman writes, we assume that boys are the perpetrators and beneficiaries of hookup culture — and thus we tend to ignore its effects on them. But those effects, it turns out, can be rather rough.

    .. 1. There’s little difference between boys and girls when it comes to sexual behavior
    Hookup culture isn’t as bad as parents believe. According to the Guttmacher Institute, a nonprofit that promotes reproductive health and rights, only 16% of teens have had sex by age 15. And there is little difference between the genders in the age of first intercourse. There’s also little difference in the rates of oral sex.

    4. Boys get terrible advice about sex
    As Wiseman discusses in her piece and at more length in her book, parents are terrible at talking to boys about sex. While they might have extensive sex talks with their daughters — about respecting themselves, about birth control, about not being taken advantage of — advice to boys, aside from warnings about STDs, can be a little … simplified. Seventy percent of boys report having never discussed how to use a condom or other birth-control methods with their parents.

    5. Boys obsess over texts and flirting too
    Think boys don’t obsess over texts and flirting the way girls do? You’d be wrong. Characters from Girls could hardly do a better job of picking apart linguistic minutiae.

    6. Boys are as emotionally invested in relationships as girls
    Recent research shows that boys get every bit as emotionally invested in adolescent relationships as girls do — the main difference being that boys feel far less in control of how those relationships progress.

    9. Boys do feel conflicted about hookup culture
    To go back to the beginning, while we think boys should be thrilled with easy (or at least easier) access to sex, their feelings are more complicated. Boys tell Wiseman intimate stories throughout her book and article. Theirs is the story usually left untold in any look at hookup culture. Wiseman has provided a much-needed corrective.

Related this blog:

(Link): Boys Also Harmed by Hook Up Culture (article), NBC News

(Link): How Christian Teaching on Gender Roles and Sex Can Mess People Up in Adulthood (from Wine and Marble blog, post by a former Christian guy)

(Link): Can Boys Be ‘Coerced’ Into Sex? (article from Daily Beast)

(Link): Students Discuss Dissatisfaction with “Hookup Culture” [Casual Sex, Fornication, Pre Marital Sex]

(Link): New ‘Christian Swingers’ Dating Site Offers Faithful Couples Chance to ‘Hookup’

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