Hypocrisy From The ‘No Slut Shaming’ Crowd by C. Nance

Hypocrisy From The ‘No Slut Shaming’ Crowd by C. Nance

Nance repeats a lot of the same arguments I have been making on this blog the last two years (see the link with excerpts much farther below).

I don’t think Nance (nor I, for that mater) will ever fully convince all, or most feminists, that some of us ladies freely chose, of our own minds, to remain virgins until marriage.

Why?

Because a lot of Non-Christian, secular, left-wing feminists are absolutely convinced that women who say they chose to stay virgins were shamed or brain-washed by their Christian or conservative upbringing into staying sexually pure.

And yes, one can see numerous blog posts or comment sections elsewhere that typically read as follows:

    Hi. My name is Jane.

I was brought up in a Christian home, used to believe in Jesus, but am now a vegan New Ager who also practices Wicca, worships Gaia, and knits friendship bracelets out of hemp, which goes towards charity that frees girls from horrible sex trafficking, thank the Goddess!

I was taught to believe when being raised as a Christian that good girls don’t have sex before marriage, and I really believed that at one time, but now, praise Gaia, at the age of 28, I think sex before marriage is okay, I’ve tried it, and it’s great.

Christians brainwashed me and shamed me into being afraid of sex. That is why I was not having sex.

Bearing in mind I just made that story up. I did not paste that from anywhere else, but really, I’ve seen similar stories time and again at ex-Christian, secular feminist, or pagan- type sites.

It doesn’t seem to dawn on such feminists that some women freely choose to remain virgins (or become celibate, if once sexually active in the past).

Left wing, secular, Non-Christian feminists cannot fathom any human willingly giving up sex for any amount of time, or avoiding sex altogether until marriage.

Voluntarily choosing to sexually abstain is a totally foreign mindset to sex-obsessed, sex-worshipping people who do not even bother to control their own libido.

They choose not to control their own sexual appetites and falsely assume other people are just as weak-willed and impulsive in this area as themselves.

They live with this delusion that no woman can possibly choose of her own accord to stay a virgin, because doesn’t everyone have sex and feel powerless to resist?

In this, they are like the Mark Driscolls, Doug Wilsons, and other conservative Christian preachers and talking heads, who assume it is impossible for anyone, including Bible believing Christians, to stay a virgin past the age of 25, or to go without sex for more than ten minutes, unless God sprinkles magic “No Sex Fairy Dust” on them; such Christians essentially deny that the Bible teaches all believers have sexual self-control.

See there, your conservative Christians and your secular feminists, and other assorted Non-Christians, all assume – and quite wrongly – that nobody can voluntarily give up sex indefinitely or for long stretches of time. This is one area all these otherwise conflicting sides have in common.

I have another comment or two to make below this long excerpt by Nance:

(Link): Hypocrisy From The ‘No Slut Shaming’ Crowd

Excerpts:

      BY CLAIRE NANCE
    June 15, 2014|8:44 am

As a teenager, I’m used to facing peer pressure. Everything from T.V. and magazines to parents and teachers tell me how to live and act. Don’t get me wrong, many of those influences are positive and uplifting, but a new pressure has completely blindsided my friends and me.

This new pressure, namely liberal feminists, accuse me and other teenage girls who wear purity rings and pledge to save sex for marriage, of valuing our virginity too much. Umm, what?

Tracy Clark-Flory wrote an article, The Virginity Fetish, that compares young women like me who believe in saving sex until marriage, to Natalie Dylan, a young woman who sold her virginity online to the highest bidder.

Clark-Flory claims that young women saving their virginity for marriage “auction off [their] virginity to the person with the biggest ring.”

The person who compares love and self respect to prostitution obviously doesn’t understand what a purity ring, or even virginity in general, represents.

….The irony that these are the same women who accuse conservatives of waging a war on women is not lost to me.

…Tracy stated that a girl’s value shouldn’t lie in whether she’s a virgin or not. I agree, and the same should apply to those who are.

Liberals such as Tracy claim you can be free with your sexuality while in the next sentence implying that unless you are willing to give it all away you are a prude and not worth anyone’s time.

Unfortunately, I know more than one girl who bought into this lie and, no surprise, they’re not happy with the result. Any conversation about it tends to go the same, “How will I tell my husband?”

So what’s the big deal? In today’s atmosphere of “tolerance”, “diversity”, and “being yourself,” I’m shocked at the hostility from liberals directed at women of moral fortitude. Many of these women claim to be in the “pro-choice” tent. Why then is my choice being scorned?

Liberal feminists claim that it is a necessity to find empowerment in one’s sexuality. But are teenage girls who followed their advice really finding empowerment?

According to the U.S. Department of Health and Human Services, teenage girls who have had children lower their chances of graduating from high school and are “more likely to rely on public assistance,” “more likely to be poor as adults,” and “more likely to have children who have poorer educational, behavioral, and health outcomes over the course of their lives than do kids born to older parents.”

Less education, less independence, less income, and a harder future for your own children? That doesn’t sound very empowering to me.

No, not everyone is doing it. In fact, scores of girls not engaging in sexual activity have found that true empowerment lies elsewhere.

There is liberation in demanding that we won’t be objectified and used.

We avoid the drama and worry that comes from sexual activity and focus on our future. That means we are free to dream of prom dresses and college instead of STDs and the kid’s dirty diapers.

….Aside from my faith and school, there are smart health reasons to consider sexual risk avoidance. The Health and Human Services Department website states very clearly, “The most effective way to prevent STDs is to abstain from sexual activity.”

Why hate on those young women who actually choose to follow their advice?

Why put down the girls that aim to be the strong, successful women the Feminist movement incessantly worships.

Logic dictates that Feminists would be encouraging girls to make the best decisions possible so they can become as successful as possible. News flash- you can rarely do that with a baby on your hip.

According to the HHS, adolescents ages 15-24 account for nearly half of the 20 million new cases of STD’s each year. And today, four in 10 sexually active teen girls have had an STD that can cause infertility and even death.

I or any other young woman deciding to wait until marriage to have sexual intercourse, should be respected, not mocked by fellow women.

…To stay pure is no small feat. It requires dedication and willpower. Those who succeed should be hailed as heroes, not shamed.

(((click here to read the whole thing)))

As far as this quote by Nance,

    This new pressure, namely liberal feminists, accuse me and other teenage girls who wear purity rings and pledge to save sex for marriage, of valuing our virginity too much. Umm, what?

Yes, and you will find that conservative Christians, such as Boundless bloggers (Boundless being an off-shoot of the conservative Christian Focus on the Family group), Tim Challies, and Russell Moore have made the same exact arguments against Christian virgins and virginity as well.

These conservative Christians have been arguing in blog posts and magazine articles in the last few years that Christians who are actual virgins and/or who value virginity- until- marriage are guilty of idolizing virginity or “fetishizing” it, or making too much of it.

Christians are now copying the very words and attitudes of Non-Christians regarding sexual ethics.

I thought the Bible called Christians to renew their thoughts in Christ, and NOT to conform their views to the world – but that is precisely what they are doing.
——————————-
Related posts this blog:

(Link): Celibate Shaming from an Anti- Slut Shaming Secular Feminist Site (Hypocrisy) Feminists Do Not Support All Choices

(Link):  Some Researchers Argue that Shame Should Be Used to Treat Sexual Compulsions

(Link):  Salon Author [who is a Liberal Feminist] Amanda Marcotte Thinks Media Shouldn’t Judge Women’s Sexuality But She Has Mocked Women Over Their Sexual Choices Before (To Remain Virgins)

(Link): I Shouldn’t Need An Excuse To Be A Virgin – (Secular Editorial Defends Virginity – More Rare Than a Unicorn Sighting)

(Link): No Christians and Churches Do Not Idolize Virginity and Sexual Purity – Christians Attack and Criticize Virginity Sexual Purity Celibacy / Virginity Sexual Purity Not An Idol

(Link): Why So Much Fornication – Because Christians Have No Expectation of Sexual Purity

(Link): When Adult Virginity and Adult Celibacy Are Viewed by Christians As Inconvenient or As Impediments

(Link): Douglas Wilson and Christian Response FAIL to Sexual Sin – No Body Can Resist Sex – supposedly – Re Celibacy

(Link): Anti Virginity Editorial by Christian Blogger Tim Challies – Do Hurt / Shame Feelings or Sexual Abuse Mean Christians Should Cease Supporting Virginity or Teaching About Sexual Purity

(Link): Are Most Churches Too Judgemental About Sexual Sin? (of the hetero variety)

(Link): Christians Using Fornicators as Examples or Role Models of Sexual Purity Rather Than Using Christian Celibates and Adult Virgins: Odd

(Link): Criticism of Purity Teachings by Christians via a Woman’s Personal Testimony

(Link): A Female’s Virginity Belongs To Her – Not Her Father or Husband – Re: Christian Purity Balls

(Link): Christians Who Attack Virginity Celibacy and Sexual Purity – and specifically Russell D. Moore and James M. Kushiner

(Link): Joshua Rogers of Boundless / Focus on the Family Attacks Biblical Teaching of Virginity Until Marriage

(Link): The Christian and Non Christian Phenomenon of Virgin Shaming and Celibate Shaming

(Link): Sometimes Shame Guilt and Hurt Feelings Over Sexual Sins Is a Good Thing – but – Emergents, Liberals Who Are Into Virgin and Celibate Shaming

(Link): Slut Shaming and Virgin Shaming and Secular and Christian Culture – Dirty Water / Used Chewing Gum and the CDC’s Warnings – I guess the CDC is a bunch of slut shamers ?

(Link): Slut-Shaming Is Bad—But The Overreaction Against It Also Hurts Women by J. Doverspike

(Link): Fifty Shades of Feminine Hypocrisy – editorial by Gresh, discusses slut shaming, rape culture, modesty – has points I agree and disagree with

(Link): On Miley Cyrus Being Sexual at 2013 VMAs – Hypocrisy of Secular Feminists

(Link): Inconsistency on Feminist Site – Choices Have Consequences

(Link): Long Editorial about Virginity at CT – Don’t Blame Evangelicals for the Cult of the Virgin – I Notice It’s the Fornicators Who Want to Ignore or Downplay the Bible’s Teaching that People Are To Stay Virgins Until Marriage

(Link): Christian Preacher Admits He Won’t Preach About Sexuality / Sexual Sin For Fear It May Offend Sexual Sinners

(Link): Modesty: A Female-Only Virtue? – Christian Double Standards – Hypocrisy

(Link): Beauty Redefined Site Discusses Modesty: Modest Is Hottest?

(Link): More Virgin and Celibate Shaming in Article: How the New Abstinence Movement is Trying to Reshape Our Views on Sex (from Relevant Magazine) Another Christian Anti Virginity Hit Piece – Fornicators Need To Repent of Their Pride in their Fornication Testimonies Maybe?

(Link): How About the Celibates? Christian Publications Continue to Spaz About Unmarried Christians Having Sex | (And a Link Dump)

(Link): 14 Young People Explain Why They’re Waiting for Marriage: ‘I Want to Have Sex But I’m Determined to Stay a Virgin Until Marriage’

(Link): How the Sexual Revolution Ruined Friendship – Also: If Christians Truly Believed in Celibacy and Virginity, they would stop adhering to certain sexual and gender stereotypes that work against both

(Link): How Feminists Are Making Women Easier Rape Targets

(Link): The Annoying, Weird, Sexist Preoccupation by Christian Males with Female Looks and Sexuality

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