The Death of Romance (How Christians Have Made Romantic Relationships and Marriage Into Idols) from CT
(Link): The Death of Romance
- The love of a man was never meant to be a woman’s greatest hope.
- … [Director of romance films] Nick Sparks isn’t the only love expert to fail to save his own marriage. Ironically, John Grey and Barbara De Angelis, both counselors and authors of marriage books, were once married to each other and then divorced. For a biblical example, look no further than King Solomon, the author of Proverbs and Song of Songs whose personal love life was a disaster.
This is not a “gossip” column, and I have no desire to dig into the details of anyone else’s failed marriage. But I would like to use the opportunity as a “teachable moment” to ask, “What does this show us about love and romance?”
The primary lesson I am reminded of is this: We can never guarantee a love story. Even if you find your “soul mate,” read all the right books, and maintain a positive attitude, sustaining a life-long love story is no guarantee. Sparks writes about what we long for in romance, not about the realities of love.
- …Nicholas Spark’s sad circumstances remind us is that a great love story is a fragile thing to base your life upon. Although God’s Word tells us to value marriage, it never implies that we put our hope in it. In fact, we know very little about the marriages of the great men and women of the Bible. What Scripture focuses on instead is their relationship with the Lord and their faithfulness to his purposes.
- …. Somehow, the church has put the pursuit of love and romance right up there with holiness. As much as God hates divorce, adultery, and violence in marriage, he also hates idolatry. Webster Dictionary defines idolatry as “the worship of or excessive devotion to a person or thing.” Even in our Christian marriage seminars, we sometimes border on exalting a happy marriage as equal with knowing and serving the Lord.
- ….Our Lord is all about happy endings—but not the kind of happy ending where a woman finds her soul mate or an old couple magically dies together on the same day. The ultimate happy ending is when we see the righteousness of God and experience the full rewards of pursuing him.
(Link): The Scandal of Singleness
(Link): Singleness Is Not A Gift
(Link): How Married Christians, Churches, Conservative Christianity and Christian Dating Advice Books and Teachings about Sex, and Sexuality Purity are Keeping Christians Single Into Their 30s, 40s, and Older