Sex and Alzheimer’s – Selfish, Perverted Husband Rapes His Alzheimer’s Wife
This is another example of why Christians – for the ones who are still teaching biblical sexuality and not white-washing and diminishing fornication – need to be reminding married people that chastity and celibacy is for them also.
Sexual self control is not just for single adults, or teen agers, or college aged people, but churches often behave as though it is, and as though it’s impossible for anyone over age of 25, which is bogus.
If your wife has Alzheimers and is in a hosptial bed in a nursing home or SNF, you should be able to restrain yourself, neither using her body for sex, nor using prostitutes or having sex with willing, adult partners – no sex for you, pal.
If you want to have sex again, you should divorce the wife and remarry. Not that I think people should just flatly dump a spouse who has a mental or physical impairment, but I am saying, if these louses and selfish perverts refuse to live without sex, then I’d rather see them go about things the right way, make a clean break with the impaired spouse.
There is something deeply selfish, perverted, unseemly, and distasteful about a husband who puts his sexual desires above his wife, to have sex with her while she lay addle-brained in a hospital bed – to take advantage of a mentally impaired or feeble spouse is sick and demented.
Has nobody else heard of the concept of masturbation? Solo sex? Sex with another human being is a luxury, not a necessity. This guy could have been spanking the monkey back in his own home, if he was that desperate for an orgasm – for him to subject his sick, bedridden wife to sex is beyond disgusting. I rank this right up there with child rape.
By the way, you (and this includes married people) don’t really have a “right” to sex, not in a secular sense, nor even in a biblical sense.
The New Testament may have a remark about two partners not depriving each other of sexual relations consistently, but unfortunately, too many (male, sexist) Christians distort this verse to mean that the wife has to have sex whenever, however, and as frequently as the spouse wants it, no matter what – this is another example of Christians engaging in lazy and shallow biblical interpretation. They will take a single verse and blow it out of proportion, and twist it to mean something it does not mean.
I hope the judge rules that the police can cut this pervert’s dick off.
Celibacy, chastity, and sexual purity, according to the Bible, do not have age cut-off limits, but I’m amazed at the number of Christian and Non-Christian people who feel entitled to do whatever they want to do sexually if they reach a certain age.
A lot of people seem to feel once they reach 35, or 45, or 55, that they can have sex as often as they want, with as many partners as they want. They seem to feel that celibacy and virginity are only for 12 year old kids.
(Link): In an Iowa courtroom, an astonishing case of sex and Alzheimer’s
by Sarah Kaplan
…After a four-year battle with Alzheimer’s, Donna Lou Rayhons died in a nursing home in August, just four days shy of her 79th birthday. A week later, Henry Rayhons was arrested and charged with sexual abuse. State prosecutors accused him of having sex with his wife while she was incapacitated by dementia.
Rayhons’s trial, which begins Wednesday, is a rare and possibly unprecedented examination of a little-explored aspect of consent. While much of the discussion about rape these days swirls around the influence of drugs, alcohol and the culture on college campuses, the Rayhons case asks a much different question: When is a previously consenting spouse suffering from dementia no longer able to say yes to sex?
..Katherine C. Pearson, who teaches and writes about elder law at Penn State’s Dickinson School of Law, told Bloomberg News that this is the first case of its kind she’s seen in more than 20 years of working in the field.
“This is maybe the last great frontier of questions about capacity and dementia,” she said. “… Any partner in a marriage has the right to say no. What we haven’t completely understood is, as in this case, at what point in dementia do you lose the right to say yes?”
…But a few years into their marriage, Donna was diagnosed with early-onset Alzheimer’s. She suffered headaches and forgetfulness, drove on the wrong side of the road and once put a single sock into the dryer instead of a full load of laundry, (Link): according to Bloomberg.
…On March 29, Donna was moved to Concord Care Center in Garner, Iowa, a five-minute drive from her home with Rayhons. Rayhons reportedly resisted the move and clashed with Donna’s daughters — both from her first marriage — over how she should be cared for at the facility.
In May, Dunshee and Donna’s other daughter, Suzan Brunes, met with Concord staff and drew up a care plan for Donna, according to a state affidavit. At the meeting, the women and doctors concluded that Donna was no longer able to consent to sex, a fact Rayhons was informed of.
But a week later, on May 23, surveillance video showed Rayhons spending about 30 minutes in his wife’s room. When he left, he was holding her underwear, which he dropped into a laundry bag in the hallway.
Donna’s roommate told nursing home staff that Rayhons had come into the room and closed a privacy curtain around his wife’s bed. She then heard noises indicating that Rayhons was having sex with Donna, the affidavit said.
That night, Brunes took Donna to the hospital for a rape test, Bloomberg reported. Her underwear and bedding were sent to a crime lab for an examination.
Shortly after, a judge approved Brunes’s application to become her mother’s temporary guardian, which cited issues between Rayhons, Concord staff and Donna’s other family members. Around the same time, a state investigator showed up at Rayhons’s home to interview him about the alleged assault. In the interview, Rayhons admitted to having “sexual contact” with his wife on May 23, according to the state affidavit.
Donna died just two months later, and Rayhons was arrested a week after that. Shortly before the charges were filed, Rayhons withdrew from a race to serve a 10th term as state representative for Iowa’s 8th District.
Now, as the case heads to trial, prosecutors will have to convince the jury on two points: First, that Rayhons had sex with Donna while she was at Concord Care, and second, that Donna was not capable of consenting to it.The state crime lab found semen stains on Donna’s quilt and sheet that matched Rayhons’s genetic profile, the Associated Press reported.
If Rayhons is proved to have had sex with Donna, Iowa sexual assault law is vague about how the case should be treated.
The state outlawed non-consensual sex between a husband and wife 25 years ago, Elizabeth Barnhill, executive director of the Iowa Coalition Against Sexual Assault,told the Iowa City Press Citizen. State law also defines sex with a person suffering from a “mental defect or incapacity” as sexual abuse but is not explicit about what is meant by the term “mental defect.”
(Link): Married People Who Use Their Spouse’s Disease or Disability to Excuse Their Adultery – an article by M. Del Russo
(Link): Married People Who Find Themselves Single Again – Spouses With Dementia / Married People Who Are Lonely
(Link): Why Christians Need to Uphold Lifelong Celibacy as an Option for All Instead of Merely Pressuring All to Marry – vis a vis Sexless Marriages, Counselors Who Tell Marrieds that Having Affairs Can Help their Marriages
(Link): AARP post: How to Handle a Sexless Married Life – But Christians Promise You Great Hot Regular Married Sex
(Link): Grieving for My Sex Life After My Husband Died by A. Radosh
(Link): Elderly Widower Dude is a Slut Says Adult Daughter – Why Churches Need to Teach Celibacy Applies to Even Married People Not Just Under Age 25 Singles
(Link): Perverted Christian Married Couple Wants to “Wife Swap” (For Sex) With Other Christian Couple – Why Christians Need to Uphold Chastity / Celibacy For All People Even Married Couples Not Just Teens
(Link): New ‘Christian Swingers’ Dating Site Offers Faithful Couples Chance to ‘Hookup’
(Link): I Married Young. I Was Widowed Young. I Never Want A Long-Term Partner Again by R. Woolf
(Link): Christmas Morning House Fire Leaves Father and Two Children Dead, Wife and Oldest Child Injured