Three Misconceptions About Childfree Men

Three Misconceptions About Childfree Men

(Link): Three misconceptions about childfree men

Post published by Ellen Walker Ph.D. on May 26, 2014

Childfree men fly under the radar moreso than women who don’t have kids. Many people consider motherhood to be a woman’s chief purpose (link is external) in life; in fact, some people go so far as proposing this to be a woman’s main reason for existing.

 In our culture, the role of father is not deemed essential in a man’s life, but men who don’t become dads are still viewed with suspicion, and they often get a bad rap. Below are some of the stereotypes about childfree men.

1. Childfree men are little boys who never grew up and whose primary goal in life is to play.

This stereotype of the little boy in a man’s body is even applied to Hollywood actors. Take George Clooney, for example: He’s labeled (link is external) as a playboy and perceived by many as immature and self-focused. The reality is that Mr. Clooney is extremely hardworking and accomplished in his field with philanthropic pursuits around the world like the ONE Campaign(link is external) dedicated to fighting poverty in Africa.

2. Childfree men are less reliable at work than fathers.Employers often prefer men who are dads, as they are viewed as more reliable and responsible employees than guys who have no one to consider but themselves. A CNBC article suggests(link is external) that when a family man asks for a flexible schedule to participate in a child-related activity, it’s perceived as unselfish and responsible, but if a childfree man requests similar flexibility for a leisure or civic activity, he’s considered unserious about his job.

3. Childfree men are afraid of commitment

The reality is that men who don’t have kids are as varied as their female counterparts. As I describe in my book, Complete Without Kids, some have simply never met the right partner with whom to create a family, and their ambivalence about this keeps them from actively seeking it. They are classic childfree by happenstance individuals. Others are truly childfree by choice, consciously deciding to not have kids due to lifestyle considerations or values

Related Posts:

(Link): Fatherhood and Marriage Bring Out the Best In Men says Conservative Think Tank (They are wrong)

(Link): When Your Personal, Private Choices Enrage Others by Bella DePaulo (Regarding People Who are Single and/or Childfree)

(Link):  “You’re not a real man until you have children” by G. Proops – women should be able to relate to this too

(Link): Salvation By Marriage Alone – The Over Emphasis Upon Marriage by Conservative Christians Evangelicals Southern Baptists

(Link):  “Who is my mother and who are my brothers?” – one of the most excellent Christian rebuttals I have seen against the Christian idolatry of marriage and natalism, and in support of adult singleness and celibacy – from CBE’s site

(Link):   American Churches Idolizing Fatherhood: Churches Want Your Dad, and Will Give Him Bacon, Guns, and a Grill

(Link): Why men are boycotting marriage, fatherhood and the American Dream (article by Matt K. Lewis)

(Link):  Baby Making Fixation at Christianity Today Magazine Online – Shaming Women For Not Procreating, or For Delaying Motherhood, or For Limiting the Number of Children

(Link):  Marriage, Parenthood, Judgment by Christians and Non Christians – You Can’t Win No Matter What Choice You Make

(Link): Are Marriage and Family A Woman’s Highest Calling? by Marcia Wolf – and other links that address the Christian fallacy that a woman’s most godly or only proper role is as wife and mother

(Link):  The Holy Spirit Sanctifies a Person Not A Spouse – Weekly Christian Marriage Advice Column Pokes Holes in Christian Stereotype that Marriage Automatically Sanctifies People

(Link): How Christians Have Failed on Teaching Maturity and Morality Vis A Vis Marriage / Parenthood – Used as Markers of Maturity Or Assumed to be Sanctifiers

(Link): Fatherhood Not Quite the Producer of Manly, Mature, Godly Men Some Conservative Christians Make It Out To Be

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