Rom Com Movie on Women Allowing Themselves To Be Used By Men – And A Leading Man Disappointment

Rom Com Movie on Women Allowing Themselves To Be Used By Men – And A Leading Man Disappointment

(This post has been edited farther below, over August 8 – 10, with more observations based on some new interviews or links I saw.

This post covers several topics, including but not limited to: how feminist characters are depicted in movies, the impact of sexism on dating, to actors who publicly express their religious and political views in an obnoxious manner.)

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I am normally not a fan of “Rom Com” (romantic comedy) movies.

But I heard some good things about this particular one.

I don’t know if I want to say what it is, if I want to say what its title is.

I’ll call it “Rom Com X.”

(If you have seen this movie you may be able to guess what it is, even from my vague description below.)

One reason I don’t want to just come right out and say the title of this movie is because farther in this post I have some mild criticisms of one of its actors, and I do not want any of his fans coming here and leaving me hostile posts. I am not going to name the name of the actor I discuss below.

Rom Com X has been on cable TV a few times. I’ve seen it about twice so far, maybe three times.

I find the MC (main character) sympathetic. Well, usually. There are a few scenes in the movie where she did or said things I never would have, where she unnecessarily was hostile to a person or two.

But of course, to balance that out, she was going through a very difficult time in her life, so to a degree, you do understand she is lashing out on occasion at others and being cranky because her life is in a tail spin.

This movie was interesting on several levels to me.

I related to some of the plights of the MC (main character) in a very big way.

She and I do differ on a few points, but I have some things in common with her, if not in the details, but in the overall scheme of things.

There is an actor who plays MC’s (Main Character’s) eventual love interest in the movie. I’m going to call this guy “Actor X.” I will refer to his character’s name as “Roger.”

SUMMARY OF MOVIE PLOT

Before I address Actor X, or Actor X’s character, I want to discuss Jerkface and some of the female Main Character’s blind dates.

In the movie, MC (the female Main Character) has a blind date or two with one or two guys (I think one of the scenes didn’t make it into the final edited version of the film).

MC goes to the guy’s house (her blind date) and over-hears him telling his ex on the phone that she, MC, is not pretty and that he is dreading their date. Blind Date guy wants to get back together with his ex, and MC over-hears all this.

MC runs away from his house. Could you imagine that being you?

That you overhear your blind date saying to his ex that he doesn’t find you pretty at all and has no interest in being with you? That would hurt the ego pretty bad, maybe make you want to cry.

MC is actually involved with another guy when the movie starts out, whom I shall call Jerkface.

Jerkface is a very good-looking man by most people’s standards.

This actor (who plays Jerkface) has been in other movies and TV shows, and is cast as being a good looking guy who women swoon over, and people in real life think he’s hot. And yes, IMO, this actor who plays Jerkface is a good looking guy.

In the movie, Jerkface is wealthy, drives a nice sports car, and lives in a big house.

EXPLOITED SEXUALLY

MC (the movie’s main character) is sleeping with Jerkface. He, Jerkface, is exploiting her, MC, sexually.

He uses her for casual sex and has let her know that he is using her for sex, and he also lets her know he is sleeping with other women too.

There is a scene where MC is talking to her BFB (best female buddy, or best friend) about all this.

BFB says to her (to paraphrase), ‘you know this guy is not serious about you, he’s just using you for sex. You always feel awful after you leave his house, after these one night stands. Why don’t you hold out for a guy who will love you and treat you with respect.’

MC claims she kind of knows this, that she is being used by Jerkface for sex.

However, MC says to her BFB she’s at least glad Jerkface has been honest about their relationship since the start, and if I recall correctly, MC says something in that scene or another one leading us, the audience to believe, that she hopes that Jerkface will come around and fall in love with her.

(There is an early scene where the MC tells the Jerk Face she does not want a relationship, but she’s only saying that to him because she thinks that’s what he wants to hear.)

She is wanting this relationship to deepen or become more serious.

So she keeps running to this guy’s house to have casual sex with him.

We also learn in the course of the movie that before Jerkface, she had a serious boyfriend (SB). We find out that SB dumped MC when MC lost her business and went broke.

This is a woman who has had her heart broken by men more than once.

She’s going through a tough time. She’s broke. She gets fired from one of her new, boring, minimum wage type jobs that she got after the failed business venture she was in.

MC can’t pay her apartment rent and has to move in with family -and on and on with the bad breaks.

She is at a real low point in her life. (Man, do I ever relate. I relate one hundred times over. Anyway.)

You get the idea that she’s insecure – maybe being fired and losing her business, and so on, is partially at the root of all this insecurity, but regardless, she has no self confidence.

She later meets Actor X’s character, Roger.

MC tells Roger about SB (her former serious boyfriend), and how SB dumped her when she went broke. Roger tells her that SB (her ex) is a real jerk for dumping her like that.

Later, MC sleeps with Roger one night. They do have a one-night stand.

MC freaks out the next morning, is rather terse with Roger, and runs away from him.

She won’t return his phone calls.

She ends up meeting Roger again in the movie.

They fight. Roger basically conveys to MC (or you pick this up from their conversation) that he was developing feelings for her, and that one night stand they had was more than a one night stand to him.

Roger was hurt that she ran off from him and cut him off.

MC never tells Roger about Jerkface, but Roger later briefly meets Jerkface later in the movie and apparently Roger deduces that MC has been sleeping with Jerkface.

MC and Roger fight and squabble, but at the end, she rides into the sun set with Roger, so to speak. They make up and make amends and kiss.

The impression you get is that they continue dating and probably marry.

You also realize that Roger is the right guy for MC the whole time.

Roger treats her decently and with respect, not like the self-absorbed douche Jerkface character.

Roger actually cares about MC and does not view her as a blow up sex doll to be exploited.

When he had sex with MC that one night, it meant something to him; it was not just some casual fling to the guy.

RESPECT YOURSELF

So, one big message of this movie – one of the sub-plots for women – is respect yourself. Don’t allow yourself to be used financially or sexually by men.

Hold out and hold on for the man who will love you and care about you, the guy who will support you emotionally and encourage you and be respectful to you. And that is a very, IMO, empowering, pro-woman message for this movie to send.

CRITICISM OF MALE CHARACTERS LIKE ROGER FROM ROM COM X BY MAGAZINE WRITER

August 8, 2015 edit. 

I saw an editorial today criticizing the type of male character of “Roger” from Rom Com X.

The writer feels that such male characters in movies – GNGs (genuine nice guys) – are not only a disservice to men, but also to women.

The writer says that often, the women in these types of movies are often insecure and troubled and so end up with the GNG.  The GNG serves as some kind of necessary plot device for the troubled female lead.

The writer of the editorial seems to feel that having women in movies who are weak, insecure, or who battle low self esteem or other problems, is a sexist message to send, and that it is unrealistic.

On the contrary.

As I mention elsewhere on this page, I have known women who are insecure, who have low self esteem, who don’t feel they deserve to be loved by a GNG, so they end up dating or being used by selfish men.

This is not a cliche’ set up by Hollywood writers. Such women actually do exist in real life. I have known some and seen some, and have been one myself a time or two in my life.

The author seems to be under the impression that in order for female characters to be properly feminist, they have to be independent and strong all the time, that they cannot have flaws, failures, or insecurity or low self confidence. And they certainly cannot or should not be shown ending up in a wonderful, loving relationship with a GNG.

I’m sorry, but I disagree. Insisting that all “proper feminist” depictions of women in cinema show them only strong and with stable lives at all times is also creating a card-board cut out type of character.

One of the very reasons I adored this Rom Com X (before Actor X kind of spoiled it for me – more on this farther below) is because I relate to the MC (the troubled female main character) so much.

My life has NOT been a cake walk the last few years. I’ve had some of the same problems that MC has had in Rom Com X. I relate to her.

It’s nice to see someone, a woman on screen, who is also undergoing relationship problems, financial problems, and so on.

The MC in Rom Com X does not have life all figured out when it starts, she is having problems, and she is stumbling along, with mistake after mistake, and one bad break after another. I relate – that’s been my life the last several years.

MOVIE RESEARCH

After I watched this movie on cable, I read a few reviews and articles about it to learn more about it.

I thought it was a cute and charming movie (minus one or two scenes that relied on bawdy humor. I’m not a fan of such humor).

Actor X, who plays “Roger,” was interviewed in some of these articles about this movie.

Remember, this is the Knight in Shining Armor who ends up with the MC. He’s the decent guy, in contrast to Jerkface, who used MC.

The thing I found rather disappointing is that Actor X – and maybe he was just joking around about this – refers to MC (the character he falls in love with in the movie) as being whorish, being a bimbo, in an interview or two.

Actor X even makes a comment in one interview that he thinks if the story continued, that MC would probably break up with his character, Roger, and go back to Jerkface.

Actor X explains that when he filmed this movie with his co-star, who plays MC, that he only had scenes with MC.

He was not in any scenes with the rest of the cast, so he had no idea what other scenes or story lines were going on.

If I remember correctly, Actor X said he later saw a copy of the entire movie on Net Flix or where ever, and so he later saw the entire story. At least I’m pretty sure that’s what he said. So I assume he saw the movie from start to finish.

So, I wonder, how can this guy who played the Nice Guy in the movie lack awareness on this?

ACTOR X ON SOCIAL MEDIA

Before I return to that point:

I checked out Actor X’s social media accounts.

I’m always interested to see if an actor is anything similar in real life to a character they played that I liked in a show or movie.

So, I looked over some of the material on there he publishes, and I checked out who he friended or followed on social media.

Based on what I saw, I deduce Actor X is a social progressive, an atheist, and critical of theism.

Actor X made a few posts, or shared posts others sent to him, supporting the legalization of homosexual marriage, keeping abortion legal, and he’s signed up to friend a famous atheist or two, and an account or two that parody God.

He is friends with an account or two that publish material critical or mocking of Republicans (as in the right wing American political party).

Actor X shared one link to one article by a liberal paper that was critical of Christians asking for prayer in the face of a particular tragedy that had recently happened, because supposedly, prayer is ineffective, stupid, and a waste of time (according to the article).

My thoughts on prayer are a little more complex.

I was raised a Christian, have not left the faith completely, and am a tad of an Agnostic now. I do sometimes have doubts if prayer can or does work.

My prayers seem to bounce off the ceiling, so at times I myself wonder how effective prayer is, but my motivations for this differ from Actor X’s, apparently.

I don’t think I agree with this approach of Non-Christians or atheists flat out mocking people of faith who believe in prayer during a time of crisis.

Actor X seems like a basically nice guy in real life.

I’m not saying he’s terrible. I think he’s done a little bit of charity work too, which I think is great.

But wow, this is a disappointment.

In contrast to Actor X….

I am a right winger, “somewhat” Republican (I disagree with Republicans on some points, but not all).

I am pro-life.

I don’t support homosexual marriage per se; I don’t agree with it in theory (but am otherwise low key about it and don’t really care if homosexuals do get married).

I do, though, totally oppose the Homo-Nazi types (and their hetero pals) who sue Christians out of existence who don’t want to bake cakes for homosexual marriages, and stuff like that.

I’m not a fan of atheism or militant atheists.

I am friends with some atheists, and they’re friendly types, but a lot of atheists I see across the web tend to be angry, condescending, intolerant jackholes, especially towards theism or people of faith.

I can’t quite gauge how severe Actor X’s atheism is. He doesn’t post a lot of rants against Christians on his social media, so maybe he’s a mild atheist.

__Edit, August 8, 2105.

ANTI THEIST ATHEIST–

And it goes from bad to worse.

I just saw some more biographic information about Actor X and a few more interviews.

According to these other sources, Actor X has never believed in God, and, since getting older, has come to oppose theism.

In one interview, Actor X said he used to be more open-minded about religion and theism, was tolerant of people believing in God, even though he himself does not, but now, he’s not so tolerant.

He sounds downright narrow-minded about theism in the interview I read.

So – Actor X is not just in support of atheism, but is anti-theism now.

Oh goodness, that is one hundred times even more disappointing.

It’s one thing for someone to feel there is no God, but another to be against other people holding to a belief in God and to ridicule and insult their beliefs and to state he pretty much thinks religion should die off already, or believes that it will die off (because society is evolving past it or what not).

My observation of anti-theist atheists is that they are almost always very rude, hostile, and contemptuous of believers and their convictions. That attitude is just such a turn off to me and always has been.

Anti-theist atheists often do not have a “live and let live” mentality, which drives me up the wall, and yet, a lot of these same guys scream and yell about conservatives or Christians being too judgmental and narrow minded. Hello pot, meet kettle.

I most normally have an “agree to disagree” view on religion and other topics.

As I’ve said several times over on my blog, I have friends and acquaintances who differ with me on religion and politics (including a handful of atheists and some socially liberal buddies), and we still get along.

I don’t agree with their views, they don’t agree with mine, but we still care about and respect each other.

When discussing our points of disagreement, we are respectful about it. We don’t call each other names, or assume each one or the other are morons or backwards hill-billies who have terrible, evil motives.

About the only time I explode in anger and get into name calling (say, here on my blog, for example) is precisely at these people who think they are so open-minded and liberal, but are rude about people of faith or people who adhere to traditional values.

The people who hold double standards set my teeth on edge. They call for tolerance while in an intolerant manner insist religious people or religion be eradicated, or they declare all theism and religion horrible.

I wish anti-theist atheists would stop laser-focusing on religion as being a sole culprit with the world’s problems.

Even in nations that have banned open religion practice -nations under communism and so on- there was still war and persecution.

Anti-theist Atheists have blinders on. They are fixated on religion to the exclusion of other issues. And that is strange, and dare I say, weirdly obsessive on their part.

EXCESSIVE GENERALIZATIONS

In this interview I read, Actor X puts any and all theism into the same category and labels it all, let’s say, “strange.” But not all religions or religious beliefs are the same.

It’s pretty rude and simplistic to place any and all forms of theism or religion into one box and label it all “strange,” “odd,” or “weird,” as he did (I’m not wanting to quote this actor exactly, as I am trying to keep him somewhat anonymous here, as I said previously).

Referring to all forms of religion and theism as being strange or odd ball: I find that pretty offensive.

Note here in my post that I’ve not put all atheists or forms of atheism in a single box.

I see that there are different flavors and degrees of atheist and atheism.

And yet, this atheist actor broad brushes all theists and all religion. He makes no distinctions.

BACKTRACKS

In yet another interview – a follow-up to that first one, where he bashed theism and religion a bit – Actor X tries to say his first comments about theism and religion were taken the wrong way, when he was asked about the controversy he got over his comments.

I’m not sure how it was possible to not get a negative vibe off his original comments about theism and religion – he very much stated in plain terms a few very insulting things, such as (I am paraphrasing what seems to be his views), he thinks that religion and theism are dangerous and should become extinct, or he hopes that they do.

Based on his initial interview, he apparently thinks religious people are all backwards red necks, and that religion itself is backwards. He thinks religion is something people should find embarrassing, shameful, or detrimental to humanity.

(I’d love to quote his exact comments for you here, and provide you links to his interviews, but again, I’m trying not to blatantly give away this guy’s identity. I am being as honest and accurate as I can when describing his comments and views from the interviews I read.)

EQUATING ALL RELIGION OR THEISM TO OFFENSIVE BEHAVIORS OR IDEOLOGY

In his initial interview, Actor X compared religion and theism to some beliefs most everyone believes to be offensive and repulsive (such as Nazism or Anti Semitism – though he used a different belief set to illustrate his point; I don’t want to say exactly what he compared religion to, because I’m trying not to give away his identity in my post).

I may be struggling with my Christian faith and calling it into question the last few years, but no way would I be so insulting, smug, and unfair as to broad brush all theists (Christians and otherwise) into one big mass and compare their deeply held convictions to being the same thing as Nazism or some other insulting thing.

Seeing these additional interviews and bios sours me on watching this guy in Rom Com X any more, though I may still watch it again, to see if I can stomach it.

And I really did like his character in the movie. His character from the film, “Roger,” is such a sweetie, too. I can’t picture the character from the movie being this smug, rude, or condescending towards faith or people of faith.

THE REASONABLE, CIVIL ATHEIST

I was skimming one of these articles about Actor X’s comments about religion, and I saw a most interesting comment by a guy who left some observations under the article, who says he too is an atheist but disagrees with how Actor X is speaking out about theism, religion, and atheism.

This commentator said that Actor X,  and other atheists like Actor X, are being hypocritical and needlessly rude about this stuff.

It’s nice to see that some atheists “get it,” that you can be civil and make room in the world for people who don’t share your views.

This particular atheist, who left a comment under that article about Actor X’s atheist views, pleaded with Christians and other theists not to think that all atheists are like Actor X on these issues.

That atheist commentator at the other site doesn’t want to be broad brushed, or assumed to be just as narrow-minded or rude about religion as Actor X was behaving, just because they have atheism in common.

He was very apologetic to people of faith for Actor X’s intolerant, condescending brand of atheism. I respect that guy for that.

INTERVIEW FROM 2014

I saw another interview, dated from 2014, where Actor X was promoting some new movie he was in that I believe also was released in 2014.

In that interview, he sounds more tolerant and respectful of theism and religious believers. He also spoke fondly of clergy persons he knew as a child, when he once went to church.

I hope his stance his changed back to being more open to faith.

But part of me is cynical and wonders if he was down-playing his more hostile brand of atheism so as not to alienate any viewers from seeing his new movie he was promoting.

After all, his new (released in 2014) movie in a round-about way sort of features Christianity as a pretty big theme, and it has a few characters of faith in it.

I don’t see how you can convince people of faith to see your movie, and one that deals with faith, if, in previous months, you have slammed their faith in interviews. But I do hope his new, respectful tone was sincere and not done for marketing purposes.

ACTOR X’s WIFE

I see in yet more articles that Actor X is married to a woman who is an atheist, but she says she has Christian friends and family whom she loves dearly, and she agrees to disagree with them regarding the topics of God and religion, rather than get in their face and argue with them about it.

As a matter of fact, she basically says in some of her quotes she thinks atheists should have an “agree to disagree,” tolerant mindset towards believers, and she hates it when atheists are rude to people of faith, who put down theism and religion. I hope her attitude rubs off more on her spouse.

CRITICAL OF CHRISTIANS WHO SAY THEY WILL PRAY

(This section of the post was written before  I saw the interviews confirming Actor X’s anti-theism atheism)

But Actor X still seems to be at least a little bit condescending about theism, enough to post a link to an editorial (and his account is public and open to anyone who drops by no less) by a writer at a left wing publication that was critical of Christians saying they are praying after a tragedy.

Seriously, who the f*ck criticizes Christians for saying they’re praying about something, and why would you agree with that sentiment and want to share such an editorial with your friends and followers?

Criticizing Christians who say they will be praying to God to comfort survivors after a tragedy, and so on and similar, is a lot like criticizing someone for saying they like to grow flowers for a hobby or to pet kittens. These are all harmless activities, usually coming from good motives.

I guess you can make some argument that Christians need to actually DO STUFF and not “just” pray about X, Y, and Z, okay; but that’s not how the editorial came across – or the tone of the piece was sort of condescending.

And hello, smart atheist guy (Actor X): it’s not mutually exclusive: people can “do stuff” about issues AND pray about them too.

You and the author of the left-wing hit piece on prayer must live in a very limited universe.

YOU SUPPORT ABORTION BUT CONDEMN WOMEN FOR FORNICATION? SLUT SHAMING AT PLAY

I’m not sure how this actor can post in support on keeping abortion legal on his personal social media accounts but then in interviews  -where he was promoting Movie X- refer to the MC (the main character of the movie he was in, who played his love interest, for pete’s sake!) as being a whore.

I thought left wing, social progressive types recoiled at “slut shaming” women like this?

I’m not quite getting how this guy, Actor X, apparently supports abortion in real life on his social media accounts but disapproves of the methods(*) women use to get pregnant in the first place which leads some of them to choose to get the abortion he thinks should be legal (*ie, having sex).

How can you (who are a left wing, social liberal) be supposedly open minded about a woman’s reproductive choices, but then criticize women for when, if, or how often they have sex with men? This does not seem consistent with your political and moral views.

YOU MISSED A MAJOR POINT OF THE MOVIE YOU WERE IN. DUDE. WTF?

How can Actor X be so clueless about one of the main sub-plots of this movie?

This is probably the thing that gets my goat the most.

Maybe I should have NEVER googled this movie or this actor to find out more about the movie or him.

Actor X thinks that MC (the female protagonist) was a whore in the movie.

Dude completely missed the point.

MC was not a whore, or not in the way Actor X was laughing about it in interviews – the only reason she was boinking Jerkface, the only reason she was having casual sex with Jerkface – is not that she enjoyed it, but that she was thinking she had to put out sexually to nab Jerkface, or to avoid losing him.

The Main Character of the movie was allowing herself to be sexually exploited by Jerkface because she was insecure and had low self confidence.

The MC was not enjoying being a whore or allowing a man to treat her like a whore.

This is a common problem among every day teen girls and women: they think they have to give a man sex in order to get his love or commitment in return. And there are a lot of piggish men who take advantage of this fear or mindset of women.

It is why, after she, the Main Character sleeps with “Roger” (played by Actor X) one night, she runs away from him the next day.

She and Roger have sex at Roger’s house at night, she wakes up the next day, and runs out on him and won’t return his calls. Roger is a real sweet heart to her, he’s very considerate to her, prior to her running out on him.

MC even phones her BFB (her best friend) after that to tell BFB she just slept with Roger and ran away from him and doesn’t know why she ran, because Roger was a really nice guy and she likes him.

Most women would immediately get those scenes:

She is running away for several reasons, one of which is, after having been treated like dirt by Jerkface and her ex SB, she doesn’t know how to deal with it when she meets a guy who is treating her decently.

She doesn’t know how to handle it. So she flees.

She probably also has some insecurity going on, maybe a fear of rejection and so on.

When women have been used and taken advantage of by one man, or by several, it is quite shocking to finally come across “Mr. Right,” the guy who really cares about her and respects her.

I’m one of those women who has a hard time letting people (men or women) get close, because I figure you are only going to reject me anyway, so I will reject you first. Or, I keep people at a distance and never let them get close to start with.

I also think if you got to know me really, really well, once you see my flaws, you won’t want to know me (i.e, stay in a relationship with me).

I would assume that MC in the film may have some of those issues as well (it’s hinted at that she does, in various scenes in the film). All of those things will cause you to run from a quality boyfriend.

Some women are so used to being abused or taken advantage of by men, it’s all they know. It feels familiar to be with an abusive scum ball. Being with a genuine “nice guy” is foreign to them. That is another reason a woman might run away from a truly caring guy.

(And note, not ALL women are like this. Not all women have these hang ups or insecurities, but SOME do.)

So, there are a lot of reasons why MC sleeps with the jerk guy and runs away from Roger the Nice Guy… and a lot of those reasons have to do with sexism in our society, how men mistreat women.

And women put up with it, out of low self esteem, fear of being alone (it’s better to be in a crummy relationship that MIGHT improve than to be alone, they reason), etc.

Those are some of the points the movie is making, jeeze louise. But this apparently flies over the head of the very actor who is supposed to be the kind-hearted guy who finally treats MC right.

What a freaking disappointment. That, plus his real-life pro-atheist, pro-choice, and pro-liberal views are also a big disappointment.

DISAPPROVES OF SEXISM AGAINST ANOTHER ACTRESS?

On the other hand, some online articles have Actor X, around 2012, defending one of his lady co-stars (not the same actress as MC from Rom Com X, but another actress).

Actor X says her treatment by someone else in show business was a very sexist thing (which he did not approve of), so I would take it on that he is opposed to sexism?

If he is opposed to sexism, I would think he’d know better to chalk up the actions of his female co-star character’s situation and actions to being a bimbo. It shows a lack of understanding or sensitivity about the character or women who may be like she is in real life.

__Another Edit, August 8, 2105.

A commentator on another page says that a sister of their friend went to college with Actor X back in the day, and that Actor X supposedly (according to the sister) had sex with every girl in class.

This is of course the internet, so who knows how true that is.

If it is true at all, holy cow, the hypocrisy.

If it’s true, and Actor X boinked around in college left and right like a dog in heat, how can he later, (even jokingly), refer to his on-screen girlfriend as being a whore in promotional interviews for the movie?

Her character only slept with two guys in the film, his character, and Jerkface. She probably also slept with her ex, SB.

Still someone else in that conversation thread wanted to know how Actor X was able to have sex with so many girls back in his college days, if true, because he’s not exactly most people’s idea of good looking?

It’s true. He’s got one of those faces. If he comes across as physically appealing to you, it’s likely only if you find his personality appealing in real life, or from some movie role he played.

He’s not conventionally good-looking by most people’s standards – not in most photos I’ve seen of him (more about this below).

(end edit, resume with original post)

SIDE NOTE

On a lesser note. The actor who plays Roger in this movie is not my type (as far as physical attraction goes). I’m not saying I always find him unattractive, only he’s not really my type physically.

This actor is one of those odd sorts who photographs differently movie to movie, or sometimes even scene to scene.

He has one of those faces that seems to vary. It’s strange.

He looks totally different to me in the scenes filmed at night in this movie opposed to one he has in daylight with MC.

When looking up information about this movie, I saw even more pictures of him.

I’ve seen stills of him from TV interviews, other movies he’s been in, and TV shows he’s been in, and I can’t believe it’s always the same guy.

Sometimes, his differing appearance may be due to his hair style. In some of these photos, he is clean cut and has short hair, in others he has long hair, in yet others, he has a beard, in others, he is clean-shaven, etc.

As far as playing Roger in Rom Com X, he’s not my type physically. He’s what I’d term puppy dog cute, but not “leading man” cute, like the actor who plays Jerkface.

But the thing that makes Roger appealing in this movie is his personality. He is an absolute sweetheart to MC and very endearing.

THIS MOVIE MAY BE RUINED FOR ME NOW

I did like this movie previously, but now, I don’t know.

Rom Com X is aired on TV once every month or so. In the future when it comes on, and scenes with Actor X appears – I don’t know if I can watch anymore.

Maybe I can try watching it again and just repress during the two hours it’s on what I know about Actor X in real life. Such a shame I have to do that.

CELEBRITIES WHO INSIST ON OBNOXIOUSLY SHARING THEIR MILITANT POLITICAL AND RELIGIOUS VIEWS IN PUBLIC

This kind of reminds me when you hear a song on the radio and really like it, you consider buying a copy of the song (I’m not into online music streaming myself, at least not yet)…

But three months later, the singer of that song you’ve been enjoying and contemplating purchasing stops mid-song during some televised awards show where she is performing to rant about her ultra left wing, political views where she says Republicans and Christians should burn in Hell.

That has always annoyed me.

Here I was, enjoying this person’s song, until she had to let go with a public tirade about how she hates people with my beliefs about X, Y, or Z.

Here I was, thinking about buying your new album, or enjoying your work as an actor, but you go and spout off rude things in interviews about people of my political or religious beliefs.

It’s a huge turn off and puts me off to your career, or seeing you in any other movies, watching old movies again I’ve already seen you in, or buying any more of your songs or albums, or following whatever it is you do in entertainment.

I really wish celebrities would curtail or altogether keep their political and religious views fairly private, or at least refrain from posting commentary critical of other people’s religious and political views in public.

If you want to say you are an atheist in an interview, okay, I guess I could maybe live with that, but it’s stepping across an inappropriate line to insult faith or people of faith.

To me, saying, “I am an atheist” publicly is fine, but not something that conveys:

  •  “I am an atheist who thinks all religion is ridiculous and stupid, and I am an atheist who believes all theists are ignorant rubes, and they should be shot in their faces and all religion ought to be out-lawed.”

I wonder: are any of Actor X’s co-stars, directors and Hollywood friends theists, Christians, theistic Jews, or right wing? Some of them probably are.

I know that Hollywood notoriously leans liberal and Democrat, but there are SOME Republicans and Christians in Hollywood as well. They sometimes don’t speak up and tell others in show business they are right wing or Christian, so as not to face backlash and prejudice.

I’ve seen Actor X do side- by- side interviews with other actors (that is, he is physically seated right next to another actor during an interview) to promote movies he’s been in.

How can Actor X go on in print interviews saying religious people are evil idiots, while on other occasions, sitting right next to a co-star who might be a believing Jew, Christian, New Ager, or whatever?

What a bummer to learn that the actor who plays such a lovable, charming guy in the movie is maybe someone I’d not get along with in real life – or he’d hate me from the start because my views aren’t in line with his.

He would likely automatically assume from the start I am horrible, dumb, or narrow-minded just because we share differing perspectives on some things.

And the pro-woman and romantic point of this movie he was in sailed right over Actor X’s head. I am astounded by that.

You would think if one guy in the whole movie would appreciate the point of the romance between Roger and MC, other than the actress who played MC, it would be the guy who played Roger, for pete’s sake.

What’s even sadder about this is how the Roger character is written in this movie, if any other character referred to MC as a whore in his presence in the movie (even in a jokey way), he’d probably jump to her honor and punch that person’s teeth down their throat for talking about MC like that, and tell her to ignore the louse.

I’ll try watching this movie the next time it comes on cable. I hope this hasn’t spoiled it for me.

I am pretty bummed out about this.

The character Actor X played in this movie was such a likable guy, a real sweetheart. Just LOVED that character.

I really liked this movie, but this actor may have spoiled this movie for me. 😦

__Another edit, August 8:

I have seen 3 or 4 commentators on other sites say they are also disappointed in this actor after the actor’s anti-theism rant was publicized.

These are comments left on other sites by self-professing Christians who said that they enjoyed this actor’s turn as “Roger” in “Rom Com X” and were very sad, angry, and offended at Actor X’s hard-line stance and rude commentary against theism, God, faith, and Christianity.

So, I’m not the only one.

MARKET FOR FAITH BASED FILMS THAT RESPECT FAITH

Faith-based films, especially ones based in Judeo-Christian outlook, have made big profits in Hollywood in the last several years. There is a big market for movies that are respectful towards traditional values and Christianity.

It doesn’t make sense to me why someone who is a hostile atheist in his personal life, who works in entertainment (as an actor), would then go into interviews saying bitter, hurtful, insulting, offensive, inflammatory things against theism, religion, or people of faith, or why he would even feel those things in his heart towards entire swaths of people he doesn’t even know.

Actor X is is offending, hurting, or turning off some of the very people who might pay to go see him in a theater.

THE IRONY

That Actor X is apparently blind to the fact he is offending and hurting people with his views and public statement of them is all the more ironic (and very sad), after playing a character in a Rom Com (the “Roger” character), who lectures his female lead at one point in the story that she needs to be more careful, because she can hurt people by her actions, and she is in fact hurting people.

Actor X’s character in Rom Com X lectures the female lead that she is being careless, and not realizing that her words and actions can hurt him and other people.

Does this guy not pay attention to the lessons and plots of the movies he appears in? It doesn’t seem like it.

The very character he played in that movie has to point out to the MC she is thoughtlessly hurting people around her due to her careless behavior.

He doesn’t grasp this same concept in real life, that it applies in real life too, not just in movies?

IRONY 2

In the movie, Actor X plays a character (whom I’ve been calling “Roger”) who is a counterpoint to Jerk Face (Jerk Face being the guy who is taking advantage of MC, being rude, selfish, etc).

So it also occurs to me that, concerning religious and political subjects, Actor X is behaving in real life towards people the way Jerk Face behaves in the movie to MC. What sad, sad irony.

Actor X needs to act more like Roger in real life on these topics and less like Jerk Face.

CELEBRITIES NEED TO S.T.F.U. IN PUBLIC OR TREAD CAREFULLY HERE

I said it before and will say it again, but I really think it would be wiser for celebrities not to publicly announce sentiments against religious or political views they do not agree with (on their official social media accounts), because they inadvertently end up wounding or offending some of the very people who buy their products or who watch them in theaters (at least the people who are aware of who they are to start with).

(Celebrities, like anyone else, have a right to hold whatever opinions they want. But I think it would be more prudent for them to make a separate, private social media account to spout off on their religious or political views, where only their close friends could see it….

Rather than do this sort of thing under their real name or do so publicly. I’m not saying entertainers don’t have a right to voice their opinions, but that they should be careful when, how, where, and if they do so.)

Based on a lot of comments I skimmed over under articles about Actor X’s rude comments about religion, I’d say about 95% -or more- of the people had no idea who he even was.

Most of them said, “Actor X who? I’ve never heard of this guy before. Who is he?”

Only a small number were aware that Actor X was an actor, and they didn’t even know him from Rom Com X.

Most of them (out of the ones who even knew who he was) said, “Oh yeah, he’s the actor who played Joe Blow from TV show Y that was on a few years ago.”

Regardless, those leaving comments under these news stories, whether they were familiar with the actor or not, were very turned off or very insulted by his anti-theist screed, which also mingled in a little bit of political commentary.

Some said now that they are aware of his views, they will remember his name only so as to avoid any movies or shows he may appear in next.

So, this actor’s first introduction to some of the American public comes from these condescending, rude comments about their religious and political beliefs.

I would think if you were an actor, the last first impression you’d want to make to a public who is not very aware of you is such a nasty one.

Then, of course, you do have a percentage of people who did know who Actor X was previously, assumed he was as nice and affable in real life as some of the characters he played in movies or TV, and were deeply disappointed to find out that at least in some ways on some issues, he is not that nice in real life.

When asked later about some of the uproar about his controversial statements about religion from the magazine interview, the article said Actor X was apathetic about it; just brushed it off by essentially saying, “Meh, oh well, what are you going to do.”

Wrong approach.

NEEDS TO APOLOGIZE

I think Actor X needs to re-evaluate his attitudes about God, theology, believers, political conservatives, etc, and he really needs to publicly apologize for offending people on these points, apologize to people of faith and to conservatives.

When I say he needs to re-evaluate his attitudes, I do not mean he has to convert to any religion, start believing in God, and become a Republican (though any or all of that would be nice).

What I am getting at is that he needs to realize that behaving like a condescending, insensitive blow-hard on these topics is not cool, and it’s not going to win him any friends, but only turn people off.

Actor X also needs to refrain from posting any further anti-Republican, anti-conservative or anti-Theist material on his social media or discussing it in public.  And maybe consider giving the posting of any pro-Liberal and pro-Atheist (in particular the snarky Atheist links that pick on theists) content a rest.

I don’t know if I can ever enjoy that Rom Com movie he was in ever again, knowing what I know about him in real life.

__August 10, 2015 Edit.

I’d say that people like Actor X suffer from Christianophobia (I may do a separate post on this in the future, as I’ve noticed it’s popular for progressive Christians to deny that Christians are harassed in the United States):

(Link):  Myths of Christianophobia Part 1 – It does not exist (off site link; hosted on Patheos blog)

———————————–

(Kind Of) Related Posts:

(Link):  I Hate to Defend Pat Robertson, However. Raw Story News Site Double Standard on Atheism and Christian Pat Robertson / Also: Brief Word about Atheist Richard Dawkins

(Link):  Movie Actor Allegedly Gives Girlfriend Herpes 1, Herpes 2, and Gonorrhea

(Link): Romantic Comedy Movies and Their Obsession With Books

(Link): I Hate to Defend Pat Robertson, However. Raw Story News Site Double Standard on Atheism and Christian Pat Robertson / Also: Brief Word about Atheist Richard Dawkins

(Link): Goodbye to romance: Are rom-coms worse than porn? (How Hollywood Feeds Into People’s Tendency to Idolize Marriage and Turn a Spouse Into a Deity)

(Link): Christian Hollywood Rorschach – seeing Jesus in every single show, movie, or fictional character

(Link):   Hollywood Men: It’s No Longer About Your Acting, It’s About Your Abs (article about how male actors are now valued for being eye candy)

(Link): Virgin Shaming: Hollywood’s Attack on Purity (by B. Bowen)

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