My Husband Raped Two Women — And I Had To Answer For His Crimes by S. Moroney
The link to the article is much farther below. I wanted to say a few things first.
I’ve only read about 1/3 or 1/4th of this article so far (and have skimmed down more), and holy moly, this is one of those times where I’m all “I am so freaking glad I have never married. There ARE benefits to being single.”
I feel sorry for this lady and wish her the best, but her story does serve as some kind of reminder that marriage is not all the romantic Hollywood movies or conservative Christians make it out to be.
Note that she writes that she met her husband – who not only killed a woman years prior, but went on to rape two women – in a soup kitchen.
I mention this because often on Christian TV shows, I hear preachers tell single women who want to marry to go volunteer at soup kitchens (or other places) if they want to meet eligible men and get married. (I also to this day get similar advice from Christian family members.)
I think this is a good example of why you need to take a man’s character into account, not just his profession of beliefs, or that you even meet him at a soup kitchen.
Just because a guy APPEARS to be upstanding – he volunteers, or goes to church weekly, or reads the Bible – does not mean he’s trustworthy or ethical.
Months ago, I posted a story to this blog of two or three Christian single women who met a self professing Christian man via a Christian dating site, and this man raped them.
What grabbed me in one article about this Christian rapist was the part where one woman victim of his said she exchanged a fair amount of dating site messages and/or e-mails with this guy prior to meeting him in person, and he said “all the right things” to her in their internet communications, and he talked about his favorite Bible verses, how much he loved Jesus, and so on. She said he sounded like a real deal, true blue Christian!
Let this also be another reminder that contrary to what many conservative Christians teach, a person does not have to reach a level of godliness, maturity, or integrity before they are allowed a spouse by God.
Here you have a slime ball killer and rapist who got married to a woman who seems nice, though a bit naive. If God allows deviants such a this to marry, there’s no way that God expects people to be perfect or upstanding before he permits them to marry.
I do feel for this lady, but there is no way in holy hell I would marry a man who murdered a woman in a fit of rage no matter how many years in the past it happened. That is a huge, f-cking red flag right there. Even if the guy is up front by telling you about it, it shows he has issues with women.
You do not murder someone in a roomie dispute. Huge red flag. Run, don’t walk away, from a man who tells you he killed a roommate years before.
She says she eventually divorced her rapist husband. Had she been a conservative Christian in a conservative church, they most likely would have pressured her to stay married to the pervert no matter what – as one church did with a woman who found out that her husband was a pedophile (read about that (Link): here – and see (Link): this post).
(Link): My husband raped two women — and I had to answer for his crimes by S. Moroney
Excerpts:
- by Shannon Moroney on January 13, 2016
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….Jason [her husband] had a criminal past — but we thought he’d moved beyond it
- [She says he killed a 38 year old roommate about 10 or 15 or so years before they met – they met in a soup kitchen where they were both volunteering; she writes: “I’d met Jason three years earlier, at a soup kitchen where I volunteered with a group of my students and where he was the head chef.” – but he assured her the murder was a one time deal, and he was on parole for it. She checked out his story and says it was accurate. They married.]
- …Jason and I built a life together with the full support of my family…
- [She is later contacted in a hotel room by some police officers who inform her that her husband is in jail for kidnapping and raping two women.
Her husband, Jason, was working a part time position in a food store when a 46 year old woman walked in.
He threatened her at knife point and raped her behind some shelves, and locked her in the store’s basement.
He later did the same thing to another, second woman who walked in several minutes or so after the first. He later took both women to his home and kept them locked up.] - …Then he [Jason, her husband] returned to our house, where the women [who he kidnapped and raped from the store] continued to talk with him. He switched back and forth from monster to human, terrorizing them and then apologizing.
- A little after 10 pm he answered my chipper, chatty phone call. When later I realized that during that phone call there were two women injured and terrified in my home, I wanted to vomit.
- …That night at the station, Jason gave a full confession that ended with, “Just put me away.”
- The police told me that given Jason’s history and the violence of these new charges, he would be a candidate for the dangerous offender designation, the highest sentence in Canada. He would spend the rest of his life in prison.
- “He has a wife. Who is she? What’s wrong with her?”
- News of the crimes hit the media, and I couldn’t return to my home, now a crime scene surrounded by police tape. Privacy was ripped away and replaced by public scrutiny. He has a wife. Who is she? What’s wrong with her? Was she part of this?
- … I was thrust upon a terrifying journey through the justice system, the media, and the social stigma of being the spouse of a sex offender.
- … I was left on the outside to deal with the aftermath, completely unprotected, an easy target for judgment and blame. My school principal banned me from entering the school without permission and forced me out of my job. I lost my salary, benefits, seniority, place of belonging, and, worst of all, my relationships with students, staff, and parents. I was made guilty by association.
- ..The prosecutor wouldn’t even look at me, even though I was on his list of victims — Jason also confessed to surreptitiously videotaping me and others in the bathroom of our home on a few occasions leading up to the assaults, crimes of voyeurism.
- …I also searched every inch of my own home for clues about what had gone wrong inside Jason — was there anything I should have seen? There wasn’t. Even a three-day, four-officer police search of our home had turned up nothing.
- Jason didn’t give me or anyone else a chance to help him or to prevent these crimes: He seemed to have two completely separate identities, one of which was entirely secret.
- ..How I found healingI tried to rebuild my life, finalizing my divorce from Jason, going to therapy, taking dance lessons, and, yes, even dating.
- …Why I share my storyGoing public with my story — first by accepting invitations to speak at justice conferences starting in 2008, and then publishing my memoir in 2011 — gave me back my voice and cleared me from guilt by association.
Read the rest here:
- (Link): My husband raped two women — and I had to answer for his crimes by S. Moroney
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(Link): 25 Totally Underrated Things About Being A Single Girl (from BuzzFeed)