Christian Speaker Christine Caine Apologizes to Adult Singles For Singles Being Marginalized by the Church, for Church Idolizing Marriage
I was watching the TBN program “Praise the Lord” tonight (April 22, 2016), and Christian speaker Christine Caine (who I don’t know a whole lot about) was a guest.
Caine has a new book called “Unashamed” she was there to promote. I have not read the book; it’s supposed to be released in May of 2016.
If I am remembering the program correctly, Caine said a chapter in her book apologizes to adult singles (especially the women) – the never married, the widows, the divorced – for how the church (as in church universal, all Christians) have sidelined, ignored, or heaped shame upon adult singles for being single.
Caine informed hosts Lori and Matt Crouch that about 57% of people (not sure if she meant 57% of people in the United States or the entire world) are single now – but the church keeps holding marriage up as the example, so that women who don’t marry by the age of 35 are made to feel ashamed or like failures.
Caine also mentioned that the 57% number is also the same figure for the church, that there are many, many single adults in the Christian faith.
Caine said that the church ignores the never-married and the “single again” (such as widows). She apologized to them for this.
The Crouch couple, Matt and Lori, who own TBN, seemed a little surprised or shocked to hear that 57% of adults are single in and out of the church.
I have noticed that Matt and Lori seldom (or never) have PTL shows about singleness, but they have in the past (I have (Link): blogged on that topic previously) devoted several two hour long PTL shows to MARRIAGE.
Yep. They have had what’s- his- face on there, the preacher jerk who disrespects singles (please see Link 1 and Link 2), on to give marital advice in those 2 hour long marriage fixated PTL programs.
I am fairly sure Caine said on the TV show that her book contains a chapter about how the church makes single adults feel ashamed for being single.
Anyway, it means a lot to me that a practicing Christian stood up for adult singles on a Christian TV show and apologized to them for how shabbily and horribly they get treated by Christian culture for being single.
More Christians need to do this and acknowledge that singles exist and that we are not failures.
In addition, Christians (including preachers) need to decrease the amount of attention they pay to marriage – cut down severely on the marriage sermons and seminars, etc.
I’m not certain of this, but I think a long time ago (one to two years ago), I left comments on a Christine Caine post somewhere on social media or a blog telling her about how horribly the church treats adult singles. Maybe she saw that comment I left her – if I was able to. I remember having a difficult time getting my post to go through, due to a technical problem.
Links about Caine’s new book, in which she (if I remember right from her interview) discusses how the church treats singleness:
(Link): You Tube: Unashamed by Christine Caine
(Link): Barnes and Noble book site: Unashamed: Drop the Baggage, Pick up Your Freedom, Fulfill Your Destiny
In the future, you might be able to read free sample chapters here:
(Link): Google Books: Unashamed
This page has an audio file on it that I have not listened to:
(Link): Christine Caine: Jesus Came to Shame Our Shame
- What advice do you have for singles who feel shame over not being married?
- Key Quotes:
- “There are enough women I’ve talked to in the church world that feel they have to dumb themselves down in Christian settings, which I think is so the antithesis of what the Lord would have.”
“I think there’s just something fundamentally wrong when any person, male or female, has to make someone else feel small to make themselves feel big.”
“You are as entirely whole single as you are married.”
(Link): Jesus Christ Removed the Stigma, Shame From Being Single and Childless – by David Instone Brewer
(Link): Statistics Show Single Adults Now Outnumber Married Adults in the United States (as of 2014)
(Link): Thirty Year Old Woman Kills Herself Due to Being Single and Childless – Churches contribute to this by either Ignoring adult singles or shaming them for being single and childless
(Link): TBN Devotes Entire Nov 19, 2013 Praise the Lord Show To Marriage – They Never Devote Entire PTL to Singles
(Link): Christian Patriarchalists and Gender Complementarians Sexualizing the Trinity and Insisting Sexual Activity is Necessary to Fully Know God (via Under Much Grace blog)
(Link): Eight Ways to Rethink the Conversation About Singleness by K. Kreminski
(Link): The Preacher Says that Never Married or Divorced People Are Losers
(Link): Want To But Can’t – The One Christian Demographic Being Continually Ignored by Christians Re: Marriage
(Link): Christian ‘Married People’ Privilege – Most Marrieds Remain Amazingly Blinded to Christian Discrimination Against Singles Or Write Unmarrieds’ Concerns Off, As Though They Are Nothing Compared to Marriage/ Parenting.
(Link): Single Adults – Why They Stay and Why They Stray From Church – Book Excerpts
(Link): “Who is my mother and who are my brothers?” – one of the most excellent Christian rebuttals I have seen against the Christian idolatry of marriage and natalism, and in support of adult singleness and celibacy – from CBE’s site
(Link): All The Single Ladies by Rebecca Traister – Various Links to Reviews or Commentary About the Book and Its Issues
(Link): I’m a [Single / Unmarried] Woman, and my Church Didn’t Know What To Do With That – by A D Abdallah
(Link): Single Adult Christian Pressured Into Marriage by Her Church – And Regrets It
(Link): Husband-Hunting is the Worst Part of a Christian Upbringing – Christianity Made Me Obsessed with Finding a Husband – by B. Ramos
(Link): Salvation By Marriage Alone – The Over Emphasis Upon Marriage by Conservative Christians Evangelicals Southern Baptists
(Link): Really, It’s Okay To Be Single – In order to protect marriage, we should be careful not to denigrate singleness – by Peter Chin
(Link): Adult Singles Do Not Need A Marital Partner to Be Whole or Complete
(Link): Are Marriage and Family A Woman’s Highest Calling? by Marcia Wolf – and other links that address the Christian fallacy that a woman’s most godly or only proper role is as wife and mother