Celibate Christian Woman Asks Christian Host Why God Will Not Send Her a Husband
A couple of days ago, I saw this episode of The 700 Club.
A celibate Christian woman wrote Pat Robertson this question –
And her question is one all Christians avoid: they just scream at a 20 year old today to MARRY NOW NOW NOW!
They have no advice and no encouragement to give any adult over 35 who wants to be married but still finds him or herself single.
The usual Christian response is just to shame this lady for supposedly not having done enough to marry when younger, in spite of not knowing her background, or what she did to try to marry – Christians just arrogantly ASSUME if you are not married past a certain age, it is all your fault, and there were no mitigating circumstances.
So here’s her question to Pat, host of The 700 Club:
- Dear Pat,
- The Bible says that it’s better to marry than to burn with lust, but what about someone like me who can’t find someone to marry?
- I gave up sex years ago in obedience to God’s Word, but I haven’t been able to meet a man who shares my moral values – not at church or anywhere else.
- I still have desires that I don’t act on. Does God just not want me to have a husband for some reason? I’m no spring chicken anymore.
If I remember Pat’s advice correctly (you can watch his response below in the video if you like), I think he told her that “God puts the lonely in families” which seems to be one of his go-to responses every time single men and women who want to marry but who can’t find a partner write to him about. I think this was also the letter where he advised the woman to join dating sites such as eHarmony.
I tried eHarmony years ago, and it does not work, especially if you are a single female. You will not, even as a paid member, get many matches. E-Harmony will dribble out about one match PER MONTH.
Once you stop paying, they claim they cannot find ANY matches ANYWHERE, even if you change the site parameters to accept men from any part of the USA or the world (I know, I tried).
Further, the types of men on e-Harmony, like most sites, are either vulgar or are entitled ass hats. There were so-called Christian men on these sites with smutty jokes in their dating page profiles, asking me sex questions very early in our online relationships, etc.
So, I hate to inform Pat of this, but dating sites are NOT panaceas for celibate, Christian women or for any woman.
Also, it’s not true the God puts the single and/or lonely in to families. (Ask me how I know.) Thank goodness I am an extreme introvert, because if I did not have high tolerance for being almost void of human contact and human relationships, I probably would’ve hanged myself several years ago.
Pat has given some spectacularly insensitive advice to other single women who have written him before, which I will try to link to at the bottom of this post, under the “Related Posts” section.
You can watch the videos here – the ones where the lady wrote Pat saying she’s single but God isn’t sending her a spouse (same video, just one is hosted on CBN’s site, the other is hosted on You Tube).
(Link): Bring It On-Line: Burning with Lust – June 29, 2016 (You Tube)
(Link): Bring It On-Line: Burning with Lust – June 29, 2016 (CBN site)
Video with letter, via You Tube:
(Link): Women: Stop Asking Pat Robertson For Romantic Relationship Advice – Whether You Are Divorced or Single – Pat Robertson Replies to Letter from Four Time Divorced Woman Who Wants to Know If God Will Send Her a Non-Abusive Husband
(Link): What Two Religions Tell Us About the Modern Dating Crisis (from TIME) (ie, Why Are Conservative Religious Women Not Marrying Even Though They Want to Be Married. Hint: It’s a Demographics Issue)