Preacher Perry Noble Gives Advice to Adult Singles On How To Date and Marry Days Before Articles Say He’s Having Marriage Problems – Consider the Source
As I’ve said before, Consider the Source when listening to dating advice.
On July 6th, Christian Post published a page with dating advice by pastor Perry Noble.
On July 8th, Christian Post published an article suggesting that Noble may have been fired from his church for, among other things, marital problems.
Why is a guy who is in the midst of having marital issues writing dating advice for singles? Please. Does the phoniness in contemporary Evangelical Land know no limits?
From what I’ve seen on the internet the last two, three days, Noble’s church is expected to announce tomorrow that he was fired, probably due to marital conflicts or alcoholism or something.
If, after tomorrow or early next week, we get a plethora of articles saying that the guy was abusing his wife or cheating on her, I shall edit this post to include links to that material.
If you’re not familiar with Perry Noble, I would ask that you please visit this page at Pajama Pages blog and read more about Noble and Noble’s church here (but remember to finish reading the rest of my blog post!):
- (Link): Rage At The ‘Spring
I will reserve further commentary for BELOW both of these links/ excerpts:
- July 6, 2016
- by K. Porter
- Christian singles having difficulty finding a suitable date or a spouse need not fret. South Carolina-based NewSpring Church Pastor Perry Noble is dishing out some helpful advice about what might be holding them back.
- In a recent podcast titled 8 Reasons Why You Can’t Get a Date or Get Married, the NewSpring pastor is shooting from the hip with an eight-point list to help singles get their dating lives on track.
- July 8, 2016
- by L. Blair
- NewSpring Church, a popular megachurch in South Carolina that averages a weekly attendance of 30,000 people at multiple campuses in that state, said they will address on Sunday growing whispers that Perry Noble, the church’s founding and senior pastor, was fired this week.
- The Christian post was informed Thursday by a source close to the church that Perry’s alleged firing was triggered by a “terrible marriage, alcoholism and maybe more.”
- …Shortly after, she was asked if she could provide further details about the rumors as well as Noble’s alleged marital troubles and alcoholism.
As to the dating or “how to get married” advice Noble issues on this page:
- Advice by Perry Noble:
- 1. It’s not time
- The NewSpring Church pastor reminds Christians that God does things in order and believers should do the same. Noble bases his point on Proverbs 24:27, which says to put one’s outdoor work in order and to get one’s fields ready. Afterward, build the house.
- “God said there is a certain order in the processes,” says Noble. “We’ve got to make sure our life is in order. One of the worst things you can do as a single person is spend so much time evaluating other people and not actually evaluating yourself, and getting other people involved in that process.”
My comments: this is a variation on the moldy-oldy dating chestnut “don’t look for the one, BE THE ONE.”
Secondly, as far as timing and so on. Good grief. I’m over 40. Exactly how in the hell long is a woman supposed to wait? His advice reads more like it’s written for a 21 year old kid.
I’m not going to excerpt it here, but Noble actually uses the “bitterness” card on his list of dating advice.
I wrote a blog post about that topic here:
- (Link): Unmarried / Single People Are Supposedly Bitter & Have Too Much Baggage – and that’s why you’re still single they say
- Advice by Perry Noble:
- 2. You want to get married more than you want to walk with Jesus
- “I’ve seen this happen so many times,” Noble says. ” … A person is in love with the idea of getting married so much so that their walk with Jesus will actually suffer. If this is true, this is called idolatry.”
- Being in love with the “idea of getting married more than you love Jesus” will set a believer up for disappointment, the pastor said. “Because when you desire someone else more than you desire God, that someone else is going to let you down time, after time, after time.”
- “I completely understand wanting to get married … but … run hard after Jesus, and look to your right and to your left. And if the person that you are wanting to pursue, or is pursuing you, is right beside you in that run, then they’re probably the one.”
I’m sort of in agreement with the notion that if you make much too much out of marriage, you’re going to be sorely disappointed when your husband lets you down – not if, but when. I’ve never married, but I was engaged to a self-absorbed jerk for a few years, and yes, he was a monumental disappointment.
But as to some of the rest of what he says under that point, I cannot fully agree.
I have refuted some of these points a few times before on my blog, or have linked to others who have.
Noble seems to be suggesting under this item that wanting to get married is idolatry, a point that many Christians often raise in talking to adult singles.
The Truth: Wanting to get married is not idolatry, nor is it placing a desire for marriage above Jesus.
Here is just one blog post about it on my blog (see links at bottom of post under “Related Posts” for more):
(Link): Desire for Marriage is Idolatry?
During my Christian years, I sincerely put Jesus first and all this other religious mumbo-jumbo guys like this advise singles to do – and I’m still singe.
Over age 40 now, still single. That “putting Jesus first” stuff is not a magic spell that guarantees a spouse – it sure as holy hey did not work for me.
If the rumors I’ve seen online are true, maybe Noble himself is headed for a divorce. Meaning, he may find himself single again soon, and good luck following your own dating advice, there, buddy.
I don’t have much to say about the rest of his advice on that page, which ran from some items I agreed with, to some I feel ambivalent about.
Anyway, if this guy is going through marital problems and is being fired from his church for that, it’s somewhat to very hypocritical he was just recently giving advice to other people on romantic relationship issues.
If I see any new links come out tomorrow or over the next week saying he’s divorcing his wife because he’s a cheater or whatever, I’ll add those links to this post, probably under this very paragraph.
July 10, 2016:
- I don’t have a source other than live.newspring.cc, where they just announced that Noble has been removed as head pastor at NewSpring. They said that Noble has fallen into alcohol abuse and neglected his marriage and in accordence the scripture this announcement and firing are necessary.
- A letter from Noble was read where he claimed that alcohol abuse is the main issue. He also claimed that no sexual infidelity, including viewing porn, has occurred and that there has been no domestic violence.
- The Rev. Perry Noble, who started NewSpring Church nearly 20 years ago, is no longer its senior pastor.
- Early in Sunday’s 9:15 a.m. service, Executive Pastor Shane Duffey announced that Noble had been removed as pastor on July 1, after the NewSpring board of directors had “made a difficult and painful decision” to make a change.
- Duffey said the termination by the state’s largest and richest church came after Noble “had made unfortunate choices,” and that the board members had confronted Noble on numerous occasions regarding his use of alcohol.
- The announcement came three days after a closed-door, unscheduled meeting of church officials that fueled rumors throughout the community that the 45-year-old Noble was at odds with church hierarchy.
- Noble, in a statement read by Duffey, said “I wish this were a joke, and part of a sermon illustration, but it is true.”
- He also confirmed an “overuse of alcohol,” in the statement, adding that he has “come to depend on alcohol instead of Jesus.” He also said that there was no infidelity or abuse in his marriage.
(Link): Desire for Marriage is Idolatry?
(Link): Are Single People the Lepers of Today’s Church? by Gina Dalfonzo
(Link): What Two Religions Tell Us About the Modern Dating Crisis (from TIME) (ie, Why Are Conservative Religious Women Not Marrying Even Though They Want to Be Married. Hint: It’s a Demographics Issue)
(Link): ‘Why Are You Single’ Lists That Do Not Pathologize Singles by B. DePaulo
Link): Why Do Churches Treat Singleness Like a Problem? via Relevant Magazine
(Link): A Liberation Theology for Single People by Christena
(Link): Eight Ways to Rethink the Conversation About Singleness by K. Kreminski