Nine Signs He’s Not The Marrying Type, According To Marriage Counselors
I’m not going to copy the entire page here; you’re just getting excerpts.
Number five on this list describes my ex fiance exactly (see this (Link): prior post). I’d also say point 7 applies to my ex. My ex kept putting his mother (and some of his other family members) before me.
Read on for nine signs he’s just (Link): not the marrying type, according to marriage counselors. (Note that this applies to women too!)
1. He acts younger than he is.
“If he still acts like he’s in a fraternity ― staying out all night, drinking too much ― then he’s not ready for marriage. Getting married requires giving up the self-focus and ‘it’s all about me’ behavior. This doesn’t mean marriage doesn’t allow for some ‘me time,’ because it does, but it’s down on the priority list way below being responsible and considerate of your spouse.” ― Kurt Smith, counselor and director of Guy Stuff Counseling & Coaching
5. He always makes it about him.
“Any healthy relationship needs a give-and-take dance. That said, it would only make sense for there to be balanced conversations. However, if your man leads most of the conversations back to himself and shows no interested in you, then chances are that he will mimic the same behavior throughout a marriage.” ― Carin Goldstein, marriage and family therapist
6. You don’t feel like yourself around him.
“If your partner has a lot of ‘shoulds’ for you ― he wants you to be this way, and not that way ― you might find yourself playing a certain role that doesn’t really feel like you. Sometimes it’s your friends that tell you that you’ve changed. If he can’t be in relationship with you ― the real you ― then you might want to reconsider.” ― Gal Szekely, marriage and family therapist
7. He cannot say “no” to himself and others.
“Being a part of a marriage means that you have to make sacrifices and set boundaries. This means that you will have to put someone else’s needs before yours at times. It also requires that you set boundaries with others to protect the desires of your partner. He can’t muster up the courage to tell his ex to stop texting him because he’s in a relationship? He has a hard time telling his parents to stop meddling in his finances? He just doesn’t want to stick to a budget? If you find him really struggling with or avoiding these types of things, it may be a sign that he’s not ready to make the sacrifices that marriage entails.” ― Nari Jeter