Cheating Christian Man Tells Wife He is Not Built for Marriage – Take Carrie’s Advice On Cheating Jerks – Equally Yoked Is A Stupid Teaching
A Christian woman wrote to Pat Robertson, host of the Christian show ‘The 700 Club,’ with the following letter (you can view the video segment with this letter, as well as listen to Pat Roberson’s reply to her (Link): here (You Tube)):
[Dear Pat Robertson]
I married a man who I thought was a Christian … even though I knew he cheated on me a year before I married him.
He is addicted to porn and I just recently found out he was talking to another woman.
They both said they did not have sex, but I am crushed.
Is this adultery? What should I do? He says he wasn’t made for marriage,
Robertson basically tells her she does not have grounds to divorce the guy (I disagree with him. More on that farther below).
First of all, I wonder why this woman walked into a marriage knowing the guy had cheated on her a year prior to their wedding? That was a stupid move on her part.
(Note: I don’t fault women who walk into marriages not realizing that they are getting a cheater or abuser for a spouse. Unlike Robertson, who scolds such women and (Link): tells them they have “the discernment of a slug.”
However, this woman walked into a marriage with a guy who SHE KNEW had cheated on her. I am still a little compassionate towards her, but I also question the wisdom of marrying a creep who you knew cheated on you.)
I was brought up in a Christian family. I was taught by churches, Christian books, in sermons, and by my parents, that I should only marry or date Christians – this is known as the “equally yoked” rule, and is one reason of several I am still single into my mid-40s, even though I had wanted to marry. I never could meet a ‘Mr. Christian Right.’
I now realize that “equally yoked” is a stupid, detrimental, and useless teaching to single adult women.
Had I been open to marrying a Non-Christian man, I would or could have been married by now.
One thing I have noticed more and more often years past is that a lot of Christian men are jerks or pigs (see examples listed here).
Many Christian women who do marry a Christian man end up discovering after marriage that their Christian husband is a verbal or physical abuser, an adulterer, or a porn addict.
I personally would much rather marry a kind-hearted atheist man who does not view porn, beat me up, or cheat on me, than marry a self-professing Jesus-lover who does in fact cheat on me, hit me, view porn all day, and so forth.
FAR BETTER ADVICE ON HOW TO DEAL WITH CHEATING MEN
Any way, I want to present women of the world with far better advice on how to deal with a cheating boyfriend or husband, whether he is a Christian or not.
This excellent advice comes from the TV character Carrie Heffernan on the TV show “King of Queens.”
Listen to Carrie’s advice to a teenage girl in the following scene, who asks what she should do about her cheating boyfriend.
Take Carrie’s advice that she gives to this teen girl and follow it yourself (link to You Tube video – also embedded in this post below).
Carrie’s advice is far more sound and constructive for Christian and Non-Christian women than any comment or thought penned, blogged, or spoken by any Christian any where on what to do about a cheating man (or any guy who mistreats you in whatever way):
Carrie: “DUMP the LOSER and MOVE ON”
Follow Carrie’s advice from that video, NOT Pat Robertson’s advice, not Mark Driscoll’s advice, not your church’s advice, not John Piper’s advice, not Mary Kassian’s advice, not whoever Christian speaker, writer, or pastor advice.
Carrie knows what she is talking about – John Piper et al. are clueless by comparison and expect women to stay trapped in awful relationships to men.
(Link): The Selfish, Lazy Husband Who Kept Blowing Off His Stressed Wife to Go on World War 2 Reenactments – Male Entitlement in Relationships: Why Women Divorce Men – and Churches and Culture Support This Male Entitlement