Deep Friendships and Other Asexual Connections Can Feel Romantic, Even Without The Sex. Here’s Why. by Ritch C Savin-Williams Ph.D.
Research demonstrates that sexual and romantic desire are not necessarily linked
Posted Aug 19, 2020
A sexologist argued a decade ago that “sexual interest is necessary for the development of romantic feelings.” Many appear to agree.
By contrast, if he had argued the reverse—that romantic feelings are necessary for the development of sexual desire and behavior—no one would have believed him.
….Romantic Asexuals vs. Aromantic Asexuals
An exception is recent research by Amy Antonsen and colleagues who combined data from seven previous studies to net over four thousand asexual participants.
Nearly 75% of the asexual individuals reported having romantic attractions for others without having sexual desires for them. These romantic asexuals did not differ from aromantic asexuals in being female or male.
… We refer to these as “passionate friendships.”
A “bromance” between two males, however, is generally understood to be a non-sexual and non-romantic friendship that is, nevertheless, exceptionally affectionate, emotional, and intimate—which admittedly are the hallmarks of a romantic orientation.
…What is so wrong with two straight, bisexual, gay, pansexual, queer, fluid, etc. identified youths being infatuated, passionate, or attached to each other without having sexual desires for each other? To lose the connection between a same-sex or other-sex pair because of culturally-induced toxic masculinity or femininity is tragic. Asexuals have shown us that it is possible. Perhaps we should just celebrate the love that has no name.
(Link): Typical Erroneous Teaching About Adult Celibacy Rears Its Head Again: To Paraphrase Speaker at Ethics and Public Policy Center: Lifelong Celibacy is “heroic ethical standard that is not expected of heteros, so it should not be expected of homosexuals” (ie, it’s supposedly an impossible feat for any human being to achieve)
(Link): How the Sexual Revolution Ruined Friendship – Also: If Christians Truly Believed in Celibacy and Virginity, they would stop adhering to certain sexual and gender stereotypes that work against both