Pastor Quits Church To Become a Stripper and Now Sells X-Rated Pics and Videos Online
Before I get to the link about the woman pastor who left pastoring to be a sex kitten on line:
I never, ever want to hear another Christian woman complain on a blog, in a book, a podcast, or on social media that the church “values virginity or sexual abstinence too much,” nor do I need or want to hear any more women talk about how much Christian sexual abstinence pep talks comparing non-virgins to “used chewing gum” made them feel icky.
Because the times have changed.
It’s hard for me to pinpoint exactly when the change happened, but sometime in the last 10 to 20 years, the Christian community stopped supporting sexual abstinence, and they’ve never truly supported adult virgins who remain single over the age of 30.
(They only gave lip service to supporting anyone who is a virgin / celibate, but in practice, they aren’t there for the sexually abstinent; they’re only there to serve the married-with-children people.)
We are living in quite the opposite age now.
The culture has changed. Most people, including Christians and churches, no longer support celibacy and virginity – but rather mock or insult these things.
In light of the news stories like the one below, or about how, what is it, 70% of (Link): Christian American women comprise abortion seekers, or how up to half or more of the church see (Link): nothing wrong with unmarried sex, any Christians out there (especially women – it’s usually women, seldom men) who complain that the church emphasizes virginity or sexual purity too much – are quite full of sh*t and have things totally backwards.
The church now openly supports sexual hedonism, and they shame or question adults who remain virgins until marriage.
Are there double standards, sexism, and problems within “Purity Culture” and how sexual purity is taught, or are there problems with the content of it? Yes, certainly.
But none of those issues suddenly excuse extra-marital sex as being fine and dandy. And the Bible does not support extra-marital diddling.
You can criticize some of the excesses, sexism, or weirdness of Purity Culture and its teachings without completely tossing aside the principles of sexual propriety or without criticizing, shaming, or mocking those adults who are still virgins or celibate.
A word of warning: I am an (Link): ex-complementarian. But as someone who realized complementarianism was false and abandoned it, I did not become a liberal or embrace sexual hedonism as a result.
I disagree with this woman’s lifestyle who is mentioned below. Rejecting complementarianism does not automatically or necessarily turn a woman into a liberal, feminist, bimbo harlot.
I’m putting this warning in here, because the article mentions the woman in the article became a stripper after joining a church that was more egalitarian in regards to gender roles.
I would imagine a lot of complementarians would see that part of the article and say, or reason to themselves, “A-ha, this is what happens when a woman rejects Christian gender complementarianism!” – but alas, no, it is not.
Again, I rejected complementarianism many years ago, but I did not turn into a sexual hedonist or a bi-sexual stripper.
Another warning: If you’re a Christian, stop assuming that the reason why some leave the Christian faith is because they want to live in sexual hedonism.
Some people leave the faith not to indulge in sexual sin, which is a common and false assumption a lot of Christians have, but due to other reasons, ones having nothing to do with sexual sins, or going after some goal or dream in life that may be considered incompatible with the Bible.
People do have legitimate reasons for questioning the faith, ones that don’t have to do with wanting to be kinky.
There may be some people for whom wanting to be lascivious is one (or a main) motive in leaving the faith, but that is not true for all.
Additional comments by me are below this:
(Link): Pastor Quits Church To Become a Stripper and Now Sells X-Rated Pics and Videos Online
Nikole Mitchell, a mum-of-three, said she has always wanted to become an erotic dancer but she was brought up in a strict Christian family which put a damper on her dreams
by L. King
She has now come out as bisexual and carved a new career as a stripper, model and erotic dancer.
Nikole regularly post semi-clad images on her Instagram page to her 42,000 followers and runs a successful OnlyFans account where people pay to see explicit photos and videos of her.
She said: “I started off really timid like just topless photos, but now I’m at the point where I take personal requests and make videos very tailored to people’s specific desires.”
The 36-year-old said she always longed to be a stripper but she grew up in a strict Baptist family so was “indoctrinated to believe her desires and body were innately sinful and bad”.
Nikole got married and became a pastor – which she said was a move seen as rebellious in her family’s eyes as a “woman’s place was in the kitchen and looking after her children.”
But when Nikole, and her now ex-husband, joined an evangelist megachurch in St. Paul, Minnesota, she had an epiphany which led to her life-changing decision.
The church raised the possibility of gender equality within the faith.
Nikole then began to question her sexuality in 2016 after she went to a LGBT-oriented theatre performance and she realised she was bisexual and pansexual.
“I knew if I revealed my queerness I would lose it all because the church is not welcoming to queer people.” she said.
Not wanting to live a duplicitous life Nikole left the church for good and ‘came out’ in a confessional YouTube video posted on her social media platforms.
Nikole, who has now relocated to Los Angeles and divorced her husband, says she is “happier than ever”.
She added: “Every person has the right to express themselves in whatever way feels good to them and this is how it feels good to me.
“My sexuality is incredibly healing and sacred. And when I give this gift to people, it blesses them.”
—- end excerpt —–
I don’t approve of or agree with all of this woman’s lifestyle choices, but I do think on some level it serves to dispel some falsehoods that many Christians have about women, sex, and marriage.
When I was growing up, I would hear lectures by Christians, or read books and articles by Christians, that if one would just abstain sexually until marriage, that God would reward you with a great spouse, and the married sex would be regular, great, and “mind-blowing.”
Real life does not bear this out.
This woman’s sex life with her husband was probably not the greatest – she seems like she feels like she needs or wants more “in the sack” than her husband would or could provide.
Being married obviously did not make this woman happy or fulfilled.
And I wonder about the Christians who preach that the goal of marriage and faith is not to fulfill a person, or bring them happiness or meaning – says who? I don’t see that taught in the Bible.
I don’t agree that the only, or even primary, purpose of marriage is ‘to make one holy, not happy.’
The Bible teaches it’s the indwelling Holly Spirit who sanctifies a person, and the Holy Spirit does so regardless if a person is married or not.
This woman apparently enjoys sex. This goes against much of Christian teaching and assumptions, especially gender complementarianism teachings, which says only men are visual and only men want or enjoy sex.
This anecdote about a woman who became a bi-sexual stripper obviously puts those false assumptions to rest.
News reports like this one just show how some Christian teachings about sex, marriage, women, etc are completely wrong.
I wonder why so many Christians keep up the pretext though, and why they don’t just admit they’ve been wrong about a lot of things for so long?
In this day and age, it’s not true that the church community “worships” or “idolizes” sexual purity, virginity, or celibacy.
Hell, the church community and even some of the “pro marriage, pro nuclear family” conservative organizations now barely hides their disdain for sexual purity – they are, and have been for years now, openly tolerating sexual sin, or are very apathetic about it.
We’ve not been living in a, “if you have sex prior to marriage, you are like a used, chewed up piece of gum” culture for quite some time now, so the Christian ladies on Twitter, Facebook groups, and blogs can stop seething about Purity Culture now.
Things are now in the very opposite direction: sexual purity is not only NOT expected by Christians, but it’s not defended any longer, and at times, it is lamented or mocked. The shoe is on the other foot now, and those who have walked the walk and have remained sexually pure are jeered or criticized.
(Link): Former church pastor now makes $100K a month as life-coaching stripper
(Link): No, Christians and Churches Do Not Idolize Virginity and Sexual Purity
(Link): Slut Shaming and Secular and Christian Culture – Dirty Water / Used Chewing Gum and the CDC’s Warnings – I guess the CDC is a bunch of slut shamers ?
(Link): Conservatives Have Now Abandoned All Pretense of Advocating For Sexual Abstinence and They Actually Lament the Lack of Fornication – The Bradford Wilcox Piece, 2019
(Link): Poster Chapmaned24 Blocked On This Blog: He’s a Celibacy-Shaming Apologist of Pastoral Sexual Predators
(Link): Is Premarital Sex a Sin? Bible Scholars Respond
(Link): Christian Preacher Admits He Won’t Preach About Sexuality For Fear It May Offend Sexual Sinners
(Link): Christian Swingers: Body-building Christian Couple Advocates and Practices Wife Swapping – and the wife calls this lifestyle “pure”
(Link): Accusations That Jerry Falwell Jr. and His Wife Becki Are Kinky Perverts Who Sexually Abused College Aged Men
(Link): When society isn’t judging, women’s sex drive rivals men’s
(Link): Prudie Counsels a Woman Whose Husband Stopped Initiating Sex. – But Most Christians Teach that Marriage Means Great and Regular Sex.
(Link): Perverted Christian Couple Wants to “Wife Swap” (For Sex) With Other Christian Couple – Why Christians Need to Uphold Chastity / Celibacy For All People Even Married Couples Not Just Teens
(Link): “I’m Not Attracted to My Husband Anymore” – Christian advice column. I guess Christian married sex isn’t all it’s said to be by Christians
(Link): Women Are More Interested In Sex Than You Think, (2016) Studies Show – Men underestimate their wife’s or girlfriend’s sexual desire; read the signals
(Link): New ‘Christian Swingers’ Dating Site Offers Faithful Couples Chance to ‘Hookup’
(Link): CDC Report: Virgin Teens Much Healthier Than Their Sexually Active Peers (2016 Report)
(Link): Hypocrisy From The ‘No Slut Shaming’ Crowd by C. Nance
(Link): Christian Stereotypes About Female Sexuality : All Unmarried Women Are Supposedly Hyper Sexed Harlots – But All Married Ones are Supposedly Frigid or Totally Uninterested in Sex
(Link): Craigslist confessional: I’m in my 40s, never married, and a virgin—but I’m happy by Abigail
(Link): Did Hell Freeze Over?: Liberal Rag Promotes Idea that Celibacy is Acceptable, and a Valid Life Choice / Re: 2016 Study Says Millennials Aren’t Having Much Sex
(Link): Living Myths About Virginity (via The Atlantic)
(Link): Why Some People Become 30 Year Old Virgins (Article / Study)
(Link): On ‘Late’-In-Life Virginity Loss (from The Atlantic)
(Link): Why are young feminists so clueless about sex? by M. Wente
(Link): We’re Casual About Sex and Serious About Consent. But Is It Working? by J. Zimmerman