Single at Thanksgiving

Single at Thanksgiving

Several web pages linked to below:

(Link): How to Cope When You Are Alone on Thanksgiving


by Arlin Cuncic

…Whatever the reason for being alone, there are ways that you can feel less lonely.


 Accept Being Alone
Accepting being alone doesn’t necessarily mean staying home and feeling lonely. There are many things that you can do on Thanksgiving that put you in the company of people, or connect you with people, while you are still alone.

Be Productive
Make it a productive day and get your house organized. Clean out closets, get the paperwork in order, make to-do lists, and generally get control of the little details in your life. You will end the day with a feeling of accomplishment, and the ability to focus on your relationships with others because your life is manageable.

 Get Outdoors
Depending on your climate, Thanksgiving day can be a marvelous time to head outdoors for a nature walk or hike. A 2017 study published in PLoS ONE showed that an outdoor activity such as hiking results in a more positive and less negative emotional state compared to just sitting or even compared to walking on a treadmill indoors.1

(Link): Table For One, Please. A Solo Thanksgiving

“Initially, this may seem depressing,” one person said [in response to this question about spending Thanksgiving single and alone on NPR’s Facebook page]. “But as someone who has spent a Thanksgiving alone and enjoyed it, I have to say that sometimes spending time with the family is overrated.”

…Complicated reactions from a complicated nation at a complicated moment in our timeline. In any case, one thing is certain: Many Americans will be spending Thanksgiving Day alone.

Single Servings

“At a time when too many people are feeling hyper-connected, overstimulated, too busy and too hassled, what could be more dreamy than spending an entire day completely on your own, doing whatever you want, whenever you want?” says Bella DePaulo, who teaches psychology at the University of California, Santa Barbara and is the author of Singled Out: How Singles Are Stereotyped, Stigmatized and Ignored, and Still Live Happily Ever After.
“Thanksgiving is one of those holidays that are highly scripted. You are supposed to spend it with other people — especially with family. All jokes and sitcoms aside, you are supposed to want to spend it that way.”

But a lot of Americans are celebrating by themselves because of demanding jobs, challenging schoolwork, family tensions or the expense of travel.

Some don’t care for all the dinner-table questions people ask, or the political talk, or the meat-and-sweet potatoes menu, or the lame jokes; some people prefer going on nature hikes or biking or snowboarding or strolling around empty cityscapes on Thanksgiving Day.

(Link): 5 Thanksgiving Strategies For Singles (Or People In A Relationship With Mashed Potatoes)


by Shani Silver

….So why are there so many survival guides for singles? The holidays aren’t something we have to survive, they’re something we’re meant to enjoy. And I will do my best to equip you with a few of my favorite strategies for doing so.

1) Prepare Your Answers
You know they’re coming, the questions. As a single person, you are likely to hear “So, are you seeeeeeeing anybodyyyyyyy?” more often than Mariah Carey’s “All I Want For Christmas” during this festive holiday season. We know the questions are coming, they always do. So let’s not stress, let’s just prepare a script, and learn our lines.

The biggest mistake you can make when asked this question is, in my opinion, to answer it. Smiling through it and sweetly muttering, “Nope, not yet!” is a missed opportunity.

Because when you actually answer this question, you let people know it’s an okay question to ask again. A better course of action is to gently, and lovingly, put the question out of its misery.

Try saying something along the lines of, “I’m actually not going to answer that question because it’s very personal to me, but I’d love to know how work is going for you!” or something to that effect. It softly suggests that the question was an unwelcome one, and deflects to another topic.

Of course what we’d all like to say is, “No, I’m not, and by the way, how happy is your marriage, since you seem to think it’s OK to ask questions that are none of your business?” but there are kinder approaches, I promise you.

(Link): The Single Person’s Guide to Thanksgiving by Dakota Kim


….Holidays like Thanksgiving have a way of reminding you that you’re single — and it’s not just because your aunt always asks about your relationship status. Although some may relish the alone time, others may wish they could spend time with their families.

Volunteer With a Charity
Thanksgiving is a wonderful day to distribute food to those in need. Contact your local soup kitchen, food bank, shelter, church, or Meals on Wheels program about volunteer opportunities.

Turkey Day is a popular time to volunteer, so you may not be able to volunteer on the holiday itself. If you can’t give in person, organize a group of friends, co-workers, or church members to raise funds to donate to the charity of choice.

You can even spend the day picking up non-perishable goods to replenish food banks after the holiday or join a group like Shopping Angels, which shops for and delivers groceries to those who are at a higher risk of COVID-19.

Host a Friendsgiving
If you’ve been maintaining a social bubble with a handful of close friends or neighbors, host a Friendsgiving. You can take a few measures to keep it extra safe: keeping it small, planning it outdoors, and pre-packing individual plates.

Will it be a potluck? Catered? Will you make the whole meal? Let everyone know how food will be handled so they’re comfortable before committing. Make it BYOB, and mark cups with a marker or wine charm.


(Link): Single At Thanksgiving (humor)

(Link): Because, you know, singles over age 18 are not “real” adults – Thanksgiving Letter

(Link): Family Shortchanges Singles (letter to Dear Abby)

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