Woman Says Why She’s Rejecting These ‘Lonely, Single Men’ – also: Male Entitlement In and Out of the Church, Men Who Won’t Take Personal Responsibility for Their Singleness

Woman Says Why She’s Rejecting These ‘Lonely, Single Men’ – also: Male Entitlement In and Out of the Church, Men Who Won’t Take Personal Responsibility for Their Singleness

Below this article, I have a lot of comments, before I resume with providing another link related to this first one:

(Link): Woman says why she’s rejecting these ‘lonely, single men’

Aug 18, 2022
By Jana Hocking, News.com.au

Unless you were hiding under a rock this week, you would have read about an article published on Psychology Today titled “The Rise of Lonely, Single Men.”

It was written by psychologist, Greg Matos, and revealed that dating opportunities for heterosexual men are diminishing as relationship standards rise.

The psychologist explained that women are now only dating men who share the same values, have great communication skills and are emotionally available. Praise the lord!

Toxic men are out, respectful studs are in.

Now first of all, may we get out our violins and play a sad melody for the men who have treated women like absolute rubbish and then realized that they’re now single and alone. How unfair for these poor creatures.

You see, while they were bed-hopping, ghosting, breadcrumbing and doing all sort of mind f–kery to us women folk, we were quietly, and subtly embracing this ‘self love’ culture that started to emerge in TED Talks, TikTok videos, YouTube channels, and various other online forms.

Oprah preached: “If you feel like he is stringing you along, then he probably is. Don’t stay because you think ‘it will get better’. You’ll be mad at yourself a year later for staying when things are not better.”

Continue reading “Woman Says Why She’s Rejecting These ‘Lonely, Single Men’ – also: Male Entitlement In and Out of the Church, Men Who Won’t Take Personal Responsibility for Their Singleness”

Number of ‘Lonely, Single’ Men is on the Rise as Women with Higher Dating Standards Look for Partners Who are ‘Emotionally Available, Good Communicators, and Share Similar Values’, Says Psychologist

Number of ‘Lonely, Single’ Men is on the Rise as Women with Higher Dating Standards Look for Partners Who are ‘Emotionally Available, Good Communicators, and Share Similar Values’, Says Psychologist

If any of the usual conservative commentators, male or female, get wind of this article by this psychologist, they will somehow try to pin the blame for more men going single longer – on all women, or on feminism.

I’m a conservative who doesn’t agree with progressive woke ideology, but I’ve noticed that other conservatives, despite claiming to believe in the concept of ‘personal responsibility’ never- the- less do not want to hold men accountable for the failures of men, whether on the individual level or men as a group.

Then, these same conservatives, who bemoan the “victimhood” mentality of progressivism, go on to depict all men as being poor, put upon victims.

If men of today are finding it more difficult to get dates, they need to take personal responsibility and work on improving themselves, rather than go the usual “blame feminism” or “blame all women” route, which is what they normally do.

I can see secular and Christian conservatives blaming women for this phenomenon – they are going to blame and shame women, and yell at women to lower their standards.

I find it absolutely refreshing to learn from these articles that women are now vastly out-numbered on dating sites.

I think I read the figure is 62%; that is, 62% of the participants on dating sites are male, the rest are female, so that women have the pick of the litter, LOL. This is a nice turn around.

This is the total opposite of churches.

Most churches have gender imbalances that favor single men – most churches have way more single women than single men. If you’re a single, practicing Christian woman that wants marriage, you need to dump the “equally yoked” rule and perhaps giving dating sites a second look.

Not that dating sites and apps are a god-send, because there are weirdos, rapists, and wackos on there, but you have more single men to choose from on dating sites than in many churches.

(Link):  The Rise of Lonely, Single Men by Greg Matos

Excerpts:

Dating apps and a drastically changing relationship landscape.

KEY POINTS

    • Dating opportunities for heterosexual men are diminishing as relationship standards rise.
    • Men represent approximately 62% of dating app users, lowering their chances for matches.
    • Men need to address skills deficits to meet healthier relationship expectations.

(Link): Number of ‘lonely, single’ men is on the rise as women with higher dating standards look for partners who are are ’emotionally available, good communicators, and share similar values’, says psychologist

August 15, 2022
by Jessica Green

Men are lonelier than ever as they struggle to meet the higher dating standards of modern women, according to a psychologist.

American psychologist Greg Matos wrote in a recent Psychology Today article that the current state of young and middle-aged men’s love lives shows they need to ‘address a skills deficit’.

He said: ‘I hear recurring dating themes from women between the ages of 25 and 45: They prefer men who are emotionally available, good communicators, and share similar values’.

Yet, he claimed he’s found that modern men’s biggest problem is communication, which is ‘the lifeblood of healthy, long-term love’.

It comes as data shows dating apps are overrun with men – who represent 62 per cent of users – and figures collected in the US in 2019 showed more men than women were single.

Dr Matos said society fails to teach young boys the importance of communication, which has resulted in growing numbers of unintentionally single men.

Continue reading “Number of ‘Lonely, Single’ Men is on the Rise as Women with Higher Dating Standards Look for Partners Who are ‘Emotionally Available, Good Communicators, and Share Similar Values’, Says Psychologist”

The Obnoxious Abuse Survivor Community Is Targeting Julie Roys Again – this time begun by R L Stollar

The Obnoxious Abuse Survivor Community Is Targeting Julie Roys Again – this time the witch hunt was begun by R L Stollar

The “abuse survivor community” has taken their pitchforks out again, and again their pitchforks and torches are for journalist Julie Roys.

This time, the bullying is being carried out by a R L Stollar, a name I’ve seen on twitter off and on in the last few years.

I believe he originally began speaking out against harms caused by Christian homeschooling? Good on him for that (I mean that, that was not snark).

Beyond that, though, I’m not familiar with Stollar. He may have even tweeted a few things in the past I saw shared by others I follow on Twitter that I agreed with.

To Julie Anne (“Defend the Sheep” on twitter) – why are you  participating in this continued pile on?

(Edit: I believe Julie Anne “Liked” some of the comments in that thread, or I saw her share it on her Twitter account, which is how I became aware of it in the first place)

Why are you, Julie Anne, continuing to associate with people who behave this way?
I’m sorry if you feel that Roys did not credit you or friends of yours or whatever on older reportage she did (which she tried to discuss with you), but what is the deal with cozying up to the people singling her out every few weeks?

Anyway. Roys is being bullied online again, and this time it was started by Stollar.

Yes, I said “again” – see (Link): my previous post about this weird, disturbing anti-Roys obsession from the Amy Smiths, Ashley Easters, and other so-called abuse survivor advocates.

If you take note of this obnoxious behavior, as I did, (that is, noting their bullying and mob mentality where they target someone), some of them will erroneously misconstrue you as being a “Julie Roys Stan,” or use that as an ad hominem against you (see embedded tweets below for more on that).

Birth Control Movie

Now, the “abuse survivor community” is targeting Roys for having once appeared in a several years old (conservative created, I believe) movie about birth control and the sexual revolution.

I’ve not seen the movie they are referring to, but I did watch and listen to a clip of Roys presumably from the film (that clip located in a tweet by someone else here), and the comments Roys made were pretty conventional.

There was  nothing “far out” there by Roys in that clip, not unless, I suppose, you’re operating from a faulty, far left liberal paradigm, in which case pointing out that sexual behaviors with little- to- no boundaries can result in things like disease or other harmful ramifications will sound judgmental, fuddy duddy, and stodgy.

Speaking of which:

(Link): Monkeypox virus could become entrenched as new STD in the US – via ABC News (warning: auto-playing video file with audio on that page)

Excerpts:

The spread of monkeypox in the U.S. could represent the dawn of a new sexually transmitted disease, though some health officials say the virus that causes pimple-like bumps might yet be contained before it gets firmly established

By Mike Stobbe AP Medical Writer
July 22, 2022

… So far, more than 2,800 U.S. cases have been reported as part of an international outbreak that emerged two months ago. About 99% have been men who reported having sex with other men, health officials say.
— end excerpts —

Secular Criticisms of Birth Control and the Sexual Revolution

In the past year, a few secular books criticizing the consequences of the sexual revolution (including the role of the advent of birth control pills) have been published
(which I’ve blogged about here (Where the Sexual Revolution Went Wrong by Maria Albano) and here (The Sexual Revolution Has Backfired on Women by S. Moore),
so it’s not only those evangelicals all you hipster “Exvangelicals” despise pointing out the flaws and dangers with no-holds-barred sexual behavior.

In the past few years, more and more liberals and feminists have been speaking out about the excesses and harms of loose sexual behavior; these are just a couple of examples on my blog:

(Link): Why Sex-Positive Feminism is Falling Out of Fashion by S. Greenberg – excerpts via New York Times

(Link): Did Hell Freeze Over?: Liberal Rag Promotes Idea that Celibacy is Acceptable, and a Valid Life Choice / Re: 2016 Study Says Millennials Aren’t Having Much Sex

Progressives / Abuse Advocates Define Christianity to = Democrat Party, Progressive Values and Views

Many of the abuse advocates under consideration in this blog post I am discussing are politically driven (or some have left-leaning sympathies).

They conflate Christianity with leftism, progressive views, causes, and the Democratic Party, and reject anyone who doesn’t agree with all their socio-political views.

Here is my reaction to what got the ball rolling (tweet link – my comment – and here is a link to the original R L Stollar comment I was replying to):

Link to Tweet embedded below.

So this Stollar guy initially did a tweet with a link to this page (also linked to below, with excerpt) at Right Wing Watch – of course he did.

Does Stollar ever follow sites with names like “Left Wing Watch” (i.e., any accounts that are critical of progressive ideology?) – probably not.

Continue reading “The Obnoxious Abuse Survivor Community Is Targeting Julie Roys Again – this time begun by R L Stollar”

An Assessment of the Article “Why the Religion of Self-Care is Really Sanctified Selfishness” – Christian Author is Indirectly Promoting Codependency, Which is Harmful

An Assessment of the Article “Why the Religion of Self-Care is Really Sanctified Selfishness” – Christian Author is Indirectly Promoting Codependency, Which is Harmful

A link to this article, from a site and Twitter account called “Truth Over Tribe,” came through my Twitter feed today.

I don’t think I am following these guys; this was a suggestion by Twitter that appeared in my timeline. The “Truth Over Tribe” site says on their site that they are “too liberal for conservatives and too conservative for liberals.”

Okay… I’m somewhat in the same place. I’m a conservative who occasionally disagrees with other conservatives, but I sure don’t agree with many positions of progressives.

After having skimmed over some articles on this site – the site owner and author seems to be a Patrick Miller – he seems to lean left of center.

I can tell he’s left of center from some of the commentary and language he’s used – for one, in the article below, he puts his Intersectional Feminism (a left wing concept) on full display by talking about how “self care” was really started by black people, white women love it, and these days, only white woman can (financially) afford it. (Though I didn’t quote those portions of his article below, but they are over on his site.)

(Does Miller realize that left wing darling BLM (Black Lives Matter) is misleading people financially or that they spend more on transgenderism than on race related issues?)

At any rate, let’s get on to the article on this site that alarmed me, and I will provide a few excerpts, and then I will comment on them to explain why I feel this piece goes horribly wrong:

(Link):  Why the Religion of Self-Care is Really Sanctified Selfishness

Excerpts:

by Patrick Miller

“To be happy, you need to leave toxic people behind.” The preaching Peloton instructor continued, “I’m talking about people who take more than they give. People who don’t care about your dreams. People whose selfishness impedes your ability to do what you want to do.”

 Oh crap. She just described my two-year-old. I guess it’s time to cut him off.

This is the gospel of self-care. The notion that the most important person in my life is me, and anyone who impedes my happiness is an existential threat to my emotional and physical well-being. …

… What’s the Religion of Self Care?

Continue reading “An Assessment of the Article “Why the Religion of Self-Care is Really Sanctified Selfishness” – Christian Author is Indirectly Promoting Codependency, Which is Harmful”

I Appear Successful, But Since Having Kids I Feel I’ve Lost Myself by Annalisa Barbieri (Letter from a Married Mother Who Has Depression, Low Self Esteem)

I Appear Successful, But Since Having Kids I Feel I’ve Lost Myself by Annalisa Barbieri (Letter from a Married Mother Who Has Depression, Low Self Esteem)

Before I get to the link and the letter, I wanted to say…

The article below – via The Guardian – doesn’t make it clear, but the following appears to be an e-mail or a letter from a married mother who has low self esteem, and she’s writing to this paper for advice, guidance, and help.

I’m sorry this lady is not doing well, but I want you to take away from this that being married and being a mother (having children) will not necessarily make you happy, or bring you joy, inner peace, or a healthy sense of identity.

I’m afraid that a lot of conservatives – especially Christians – keep promoting these false notions to women, from the time we are girls, that if we just marry (and/or have children), that being married and a parent will bring us permanent happiness and purpose in life, but clearly, that is not the case.

I am not “anti family” nor “anti motherhood,” but I figured out a long time ago that being a parent or married may not bring you fulfillment in life, and it is that expectation that a lot of “pro family,” “pro motherhood” type of conservatives continue to hold up – it is misleading, false hope and propaganda.

I’ve got other examples on my blog of women who married (or who are mothers), and yet, being married (or being a mother) didn’t bring them happiness, but they were still left feeling overlooked, depressed, or lonely – in some cases, because the man they married doesn’t meet their emotional needs regularly, but spends all his day wrapped up in his hobbies or watching television.

I have blog posts of women who admit that they regret motherhood!

I think if you’re someone who had hoped or expected to marry (or have children) it can be painful  or very disappointing if that did not happen for you, but if you can accept it,
and permit yourself to go through a grieving process and determine to move on in life and determine to enjoy life anyway (in spite of life not turning out how you had hoped), that you can ultimately find joy, happiness, fun, and peace without a spouse and without children.

You can find other avenues of joy, meaning, and happiness in life that don’t involve being married or having children. I made that transition myself years ago, though it took me several years of grappling with unhappiness to get there, but it can be done.

But again, notice, that although the woman letter writer here married and had children, that she is STILL depressed, feels like a failure, feels like a “loser,” and thinks she is not enough.

Being a wife and a mother – contrary to what a lot of excessively pro-family, pro-natalism Christian conservatives bang on about – did not fill that empty void she has, nor increase her self image to a healthy level.

(Link): I appear successful, but since having kids I feel I’ve lost myself

Excerpts:

Squashing your anger down is exhausting. Try using your free time to do what makes you feel good, and see what shifts

May 20, 2022
by Annalisa Barbieri

[This appears to be a question from a writer to an advice columnist named Annalisa Barbieri? – the article doesn’t make it clear]:

[Dear Advice Columnist,]

I have struggled with depression and anxiety since my teens and have had therapy and medication on and off since I was 17 (I am now 37). I’m aware of deep-rooted low self-esteem and shame.

I feel worthless. I never want to draw attention to myself and have a paralysing fear of confrontation.

I have managed to maintain a few close friendships, have worked in the past, and am married with two kids. So I appear “successful” on the surface.

Continue reading “I Appear Successful, But Since Having Kids I Feel I’ve Lost Myself by Annalisa Barbieri (Letter from a Married Mother Who Has Depression, Low Self Esteem)”

The Fragile Male Ego That Can’t Function Without Constant Sexual Validation by S. Ashley

The Fragile Male Ego That Can’t Function Without Constant Sexual Validation by S. Ashley

The following pertains to Christian author Gary Thomas and his weird, sexist marital advice book, Married Sex, that got savaged by Christian women on social media in 2021.

I will provide an excerpt or two below, but really, this author’s entire review of Thomas’ book is quite good, so I would ask that you please click the link below to visit her review – which is hosted on Medium – to read the entire piece.

(Link): The Fragile Male Ego That Can’t Function Without Constant Sexual Validation by S. Ashley

Excerpts:

[Thomas earlier book, When to Walk Away, was well-received by many Christian women.]

Unfortunately, his latest book (co-authored by Debra K. Fileta and published by Zondervan Books), Married Sex, comes across more like a sex-obsessed man desperately trying to convince himself and the rest of us that his fixations were “designed by God.”

[The author of the piece then goes on to discuss certain parts of the book by Thomas that concerned her.]

[Excerpt from the Gary Thomas book, by Thomas]:

“Now she asks us to put a coaster under our drink or pick up our socks from the floor, and we act like she’s requesting twelve hours of hard labor. God isn’t unaware of this tendency, so he has given us men a physiological compulsion to keep our wives near and dear in our affections.
If it has been a while since we’ve had sex, those hormones start to boil, and the “drive” slowly begins to captivate our minds. If we grow in love and understanding, we’ll learn that for our wives to be sexually available to us, they need to be relationally and even spiritually connected with us.

When I saw this as God’s creational design, I realized that my sex drive was God’s way of keeping me aware of my wife’s relational needs. The fact that our brains have so much more space devoted to sex drive motivates us men to pursue our wives on all levels—with loyalty, empathy, and love. God’s design is for men to be so sexually vulnerable to their wives that they don’t neglect them in other aspects of the relationship.”
— end Thomas book excerpt —

This is so, so, so… gross. So gross! I (and so many other women) have zero interest in being with a man who requires constant sexual incentive just to be a decent human being.

Continue reading “The Fragile Male Ego That Can’t Function Without Constant Sexual Validation by S. Ashley”

Secular Sex Ed Failures, Secular Sexual and Biological Ignorance

Secular Sex Ed Failures, Secular Sexual and Biological Ignorance

Are you counting on secular sources to educate you properly on sex, biology, anatomy, or puberty? Are you counting on secular sources to even address a possible (negative) psychological and emotional consequence of having sex when you’re not truly ready, or don’t want to do it, but feel shamed or guilted by a date or culture, into having sex? Ha ha, well, good luck with that!

Not only do some Non-Christians hold false or weird ideas about sex themselves, but some Non-Christians like to portray all or most Christians as having false, shaming, or weird ideas about sex.

As someone who has followed a lot of Non-Christian, feminist social media accounts or who has dropped by their magazine sites to read their articles about sex, men, and sexism in the last several years, one recurrent theme that shows up is how ignorant teen boys and men in their 20s (and sometimes older men) are about sex.

I should maybe do a post about that later.

But the fact is, a lot of Non-Christian men, who are being raised in secular culture, some of whom have who even been exposed to secular sex education teachings in public school, have NO IDEA how a woman’s body works.

A lot of these Non-Christian men hold all sorts of false, bonkers ideas of how  menstrual periods work, or how a woman can get pregnant, for example, which shocks the secular, feminist women writers.

There are secular, liberal feminists who mock this secular, male ignorance all the time on their sites.

You can probably google to find examples of it. Maybe I will make a post about it later. I’ve seen a lot of it over the years.

Sexual Abstinence is, in fact, one way to totally avoid contracting STIs, sorry to inform the critics of Christian sexual ethics, or the high school kids in some of the quotes below on the BuzzFeed site, who lament that their sex ed teachings advised them (accurately!) that sexual abstinence is the safest bet.

There is no form of artificial birth control that is 100% effective. Condoms are cited as being 98% effective, but what if you’re in on that two percent failure rate?

Some forms of sexual acts, such as anal sex (which (Link): some secular teen magazines have been promoting in the last few years), are more liable to cause or spread disease and create physical issues.
See, for example, this SECULAR (Non-Christian) page about anal sex at WebMD, which confirms that:

(Link):  Anal Sex Safety: What to Know

Excerpt:

The lining of the anus is thinner than the vagina, and it lacks natural lubrication. That makes it much more vulnerable to tearing. Tears can allow viruses and bacteria to enter the bloodstream. This can include sexually transmitted infections, such as HIV.

Studies have suggested that anal exposure to HIV poses 30 times more risk for the receptive partner than vaginal exposure.

Anal intercourse can also boost the risk of getting the human papillomavirus (HPV).

HPV may also lead to the development of anal warts and anal cancer. Using lubricants can help, but it doesn’t completely prevent tearing.

The tissue inside the anus is not as well-protected as the skin outside the anus. Our external tissue has layers of dead cells that serve as a protective barrier against infection. The tissue inside the anus doesn’t have this natural protection, which leaves it vulnerable to tearing and the spread of infection.

The anus was designed to hold in feces. The anus is surrounded with a ring-like muscle, called the anal sphincter, which tightens after we have a bowel movement. When the muscle is tight, anal penetration can be painful and difficult.

Repetitive anal sex may weaken the anal sphincter, making it difficult to hold in feces until you can get to the toilet. Kegel exercises to strengthen the sphincter may help prevent this problem or correct it.

The anus is full of bacteria. Bacteria normally in the anus can potentially infect the giving partner. Having vaginal sex after anal sex can also lead to vaginal and urinary tract infections.
— end excerpts —

I don’t think all the samples on the pages below are all Christian –
(I am not going to copy the entire pages; if you’d like to see all the examples, please use the links below to visit the pages to view them all if you want to):

(Link): One Man Believes Women With Large Boobs Scientifically Can’t Be Smart And 49 Other Jaw-dropping Misconceptions Men Actually Believe About Women (some of the examples on the page involve inaccurate ideas men have about female anatomy, biology, etc)

(Link):  34 Things Some Men Believe About The Female Body That Concern Me

I think it’s time for us to have an adult sex-ed class because WHEW, child.

…5. “I’m a female student who’s taking sex ed now.
The funniest thing to me is how often they refer to penises and male anatomy, but rarely discuss vaginas and female anatomy. It’s kinda disgusting how little the guys have to learn about vaginas and periods, yet, I know pretty much everything about males now.”

(Link):  People Are Sharing What’s Being Taught Today In Sex Ed And It Proves We Still Have A Long Way To Go

(Link):  “My Sex Ed Teacher Told Me Women Cannot Orgasm”: People Are Sharing The Biggest Sex Ed Failures They’ve Ever Witnessed

Excerpts:

“My male sex education teacher told our entire classroom that period cramps do not exist and that he would not accept them as an excuse to get out of gym class.”

January 8, 2022
by Maya Ogolini – BuzzFeed Staff

Let’s face it: Sex can sometimes be an uncomfortable conversation topic when you’re young. Whether your school had a teacher attempt to explain things in health class or your parents sat you down for a “birds and the bees” talk, chances are you spent a majority of the time learning about sex wishing that you were anywhere else.

But sometimes trying your best to avoid an awkward situation can actually result in a much more awkward, embarrassing situation.

Recently, Reddit user u/wilson-volleyball77 asked,

“What is one sex education fail you’ve heard/experienced?”

Here are some of the best:

1. “If you use a tampon before sex, then you’re no longer a virgin. The number of people that believe this is unbelievable.”
—u/Typical-Cantaloupe48

“When I was a freshman in high school, my dad heard me tell my mom that I needed tampons from the store, and he freaked out. He thought that you had to have sex first before being able to use them. I was only 14, and I understood all that a lot better than him.
—u/sunflowerssunshine_

…6. “A guy once told me he thought periods lasted a whole month.”
—u/AstroLozza

7. “I was asked this question, ‘How will you be able to pee when you have your hysterectomy?’
—u/purely_logic

“I had to tell my first girlfriend she didn’t pee out of her vagina. She didn’t know she had a urethra.”
—u/Sebastian83100

Continue reading “Secular Sex Ed Failures, Secular Sexual and Biological Ignorance”

New York Times: Respect Your Daughter’s Choice To Be A Married Man’s Mistress by T. Justice

New York Times: Respect Your Daughter’s Choice To Be A Married Man’s Mistress by T. Justice

(Link): New York Times: Respect Your Daughter’s Choice To Be A Married Man’s Mistress

January 18, 2022

Poetic Justice is an advice column that offers counter-advice to submissions at other publications whose contributors have failed the reader.

The New York Times last week admonished a woman who was uncomfortable about the prospect of allowing her daughter in a relationship with a married man to bring him on a Greek vacation.

[The letter reads]…

My 30-year-old daughter is in a polyamorous relationship with a married man.

Continue reading “New York Times: Respect Your Daughter’s Choice To Be A Married Man’s Mistress by T. Justice”

Rebuttal to, Or Observations About, the Kerwin Holmes Jr. Editorial “On Finding ‘The One:’ Another Correction on Christian Teaching Concerning Romance”

Rebuttal to, Or Observations About, the Kerwin Holmes Jr. Editorial “On Finding ‘The One:’ Another Correction on Christian Teaching Concerning Romance”

The following post has been edited after publication to fix typing mistakes or to add more commentary.


I will be commenting on this editorial about singleness and marriage on The Christian Post:

(Link): On finding ‘the one:’ Another correction on Christian teaching concerning romance by Kerwin Holmes Jr

That post as linked to on The Christian Post’s Facebook page:

(Link): On Finding The One – post on Facebook Page

This guy’s editorial is written in an odd way, so I’m having to go back and re-read it to just to try and comprehend some of the points he’s making.

Maybe I am totally wrong about this, but my impression is that Holmes is either in his 20s at this time, or in his 30s.
(Wait until he’s in his 40s or older and STILL single.  If Holmes still has not married by age 40 or older, his views on these matters will likely shift in time, thanks to good old life experience.) kermitTyping

Also distracting: his first name, Kerwin, reminds me of Kermit the Frog, so I unintentionally keep visualizing Kermit sitting at a keyboard typing this editorial I am reading. (That is not intended to be an ad hominem, just a random aside.)

At the beginning of Holmes’ editorial, he tells readers to view or read dating advice articles or videos by Christian pastors or personalities that he agrees with, such as the works by Reformed pastors or personalities in general and Voddie Baucham in particular .

Let me stop him right there.

I spent years following Christian dating advice (stuff I read or heard in the 1980s and 1990s, advice by and from standard, run- of- the- mill conservative Baptist or evangelical Christians), and none of that smelly, stupid advice ever actually helped me to marry, though I had wanted to be married for many years (I am currently in my 50s and still single). 

As a matter of fact, a lot of Christian dating advice, even the advice by conservative Christians, is counter-productive and actually plays a role in keeping single adults single (this includes, and is not limited to, the “be equally yoked” rule).

Continue reading “Rebuttal to, Or Observations About, the Kerwin Holmes Jr. Editorial “On Finding ‘The One:’ Another Correction on Christian Teaching Concerning Romance””

Eugene, the 56 Year Old Man, Tells Christian Show Host He’s Tired of Being Single

Eugene, the 56 Year Old Man, Tells Christian Show Host He’s Tired of Being Single

On today’s “The 700 Club,” host Pat Robertson got a question from a guy who says he’s 56 year old and tired of being alone. (The guy is single and would like a girlfriend, or to marry.)

I’ve said it before, but I’ll say it again – single adults of America (but especially women!) please (Link): stop asking Pat Robertson for relationship advice.

I’ve watched his “700 Club” show for many years, and Robertson always gives the same 3 to 4 answers to single adults who write him asking him why hasn’t God sent them a spouse, or how do they get a spouse?

And Pat Robertson always tells lovelorn single adults to “go fishing where the fish are,” (i.e, visit locales where you are sure to find single adults), and, he will tell you that “God puts the lonely in families,” which is a load of sh*t – no, God does not always put single adults who may be lonely “into families.”

For women who write in, especially if they are age 40 or older and single and want a spouse, Pat will insultingly tell them that they “sound desperate.” (Seriously; he has done this in the past, see the links below under “Related Posts” for links to examples of this atrocious behavior.)

(I’ve noticed that Robertson never tells the older single MEN who write in saying they are lonely and want a spouse that the MEN “sound desperate.” Robertson only tosses that sexist, insulting comment at single WOMEN.)

Pat Robertson also wrongly believes (and many Christians are like this as well, not just him), that (Link): if you want a spouse and pray for one, that God will of course send you one – which also a bunch of garbage.

So, here is what Eugene wrote in to Pat:

What do I have to do to find that special woman in my life? I’m tired of living alone in life. It’s been 56 years. Please help me, Pat. I read the Bible, but it never seems to help. I love all you guys and enjoy your show.

[Signed] Eugene

You can view / listen to Eugene’s question in this video on You Tube, and it’s around 44.25 into the video.

You can also listen to Pat Robertson’s unhelpful advice in that video to Eugene.

But… Eugene… should you read this, I have this to say to you:

Continue reading “Eugene, the 56 Year Old Man, Tells Christian Show Host He’s Tired of Being Single”

The Dear Driscoll Site – Re: Mark Driscoll – Christians: Stop Supporting Driscoll, any church Driscoll runs, and Stop Supporting Guys Like Him!

The Dear Driscoll Site – Re: Mark Driscoll – Christians: Stop Supporting Driscoll, any church Driscoll runs, and Stop Supporting Guys Like Him!

Update below, July 2021. (Links to the Julie Roys July 2021 part 1 and 2 Mark Driscoll related podcasts below)


I recently became aware of this new site: (Link): “Dear Driscoll.”

Currently, at the top of that web page, is this remark, to give you some background on that site’s purpose:

This site was formed out of the need to centralize articles, videospodcasts, and other items regarding recent events at The Trinity Church in Scottsdale, AZ and historical events from Mars Hill Church in Seattle, WA.

…-The Dear Driscoll Team
—- end —

Currently on the main page of the site is a lengthy letter by a guy named Chad Freese who used to work at Driscoll’s church in Arizona.

Freese says he and his wife attended Driscoll’s church for awhile, and for a few weeks, Freese was even employed as the church’s director of security.

I’ve not even read through one fourth of the guy’s letter yet (I’ve only read the first few sections), and I already have some observations and concerns.

Continue reading “The Dear Driscoll Site – Re: Mark Driscoll – Christians: Stop Supporting Driscoll, any church Driscoll runs, and Stop Supporting Guys Like Him!”

Parents Want To “Collect” Off Of Their Child’s Wedding – She Says No And Family Drama Ensues

Parents Want To “Collect” Off Of Their Child’s Wedding – She Says No And Family Drama Ensues

(Link): Parents Want To “Collect” Off Of Their Child’s Wedding – She Says No And Family Drama Ensues

Excerpts:

by Jonas Grinevičius and Austėja Akavickaitė

…A redditor shared how their parents were planning to use their wedding as a way to make bank.

See, they were planning to force their child to invite all of their distant relations and acquaintances so that everybody brings money as a gift.

That, in their parents’ opinion, is their way of getting back all the cash that they gave out at other people’s weddings, graduation parties, and other important events.

Naturally, the redditor confronted their parents when they realized that they have zero control over their own wedding.

Continue reading “Parents Want To “Collect” Off Of Their Child’s Wedding – She Says No And Family Drama Ensues”