A Table For One: A Critical Reading of Singlehood, Gender and Time (podcast and free book on singleness from author Kinneret Lahad)

A Table For One: Critical Reading of Singlehood, Gender and Time (podcast and free book on singleness from author Kinneret Lahad)

The author was also offering a free (yes, free – and it’s totally legal) download or copy of her book about singleness (a book which I have not read; I may do so later).

I did listen to the interview she gave for the podcast linked to here:

(Link): A Critical Reading of Singlehood, Gender and Time
^ Podcast on that Page

Why are you still single?

This question is often asked of single women, especially those who are deemed by loved ones or friends to be too old to be single.

In her newest book, A Table for One: A Critical Reading of Singlehood, Gender and Time(Manchester University Press, 2017), Kinneret Lahad analyzes this undertheorized aspect of the gendered experience.

Singlehood is inextricably linked to a post-structural analysis of time: not only are single women judged on their single status based on how old they are, but Lahad argues that being single often ages women at a faster rate in the eyes of others.

Continue reading “A Table For One: A Critical Reading of Singlehood, Gender and Time (podcast and free book on singleness from author Kinneret Lahad)”

Why Are So Many Single Women Leaving the Church? by K. Gaddini

Why Are So Many Single Women Leaving the Church? by K. Gaddini

I have been blogging about this topic, and ones pertaining to it, for several years now. It’s no mystery to me why women have been leaving the church in droves the last ten or more years.

(If you’d like to see just a few of my posts explaining why the Christian faith, or more specifically, churches, are a huge turn-off to single women, please see some of the links to my other blog posts below in this post, under the “Related Posts” heading.)

However, most Christians only obsess over smaller numbers of MEN leaving church; they don’t seem to either notice or to care that single women have been dropping out as well.

One of the few things this article highlights is that the “equally yoked” rule is a waste of time for women of faith who’d like to be married.

If you are a Christian woman, and you’d like to marry, it is vital you give up a hope or strict rule of marrying only a Christian man – otherwise, you are more than likely to remain single.

Secondly, and obviously, too many churches have made marriage and parenthood into idols and benchmarks of adulthood, so that any woman who doesn’t marry or have kids is ignored or viewed and treated like a child. That needs to change. Single women should be valued and recognized in their singleness. 

I can also see how gender complementarianism (traditional gender roles) are also keeping these Christian women from getting married: they have internalized the idea that being anything other than the Christian gender complementarian woman (i.e., a passive doormat) hinders them from getting a husband, and worse yet, some of the men they’ve met in church actually do feel that way.

Christians need to toss out the regressive stereotypes (which are snuck into Christian teaching under heretical gender complementarian teachings) if they are truly concerned about declining marriage rates and would like to actually help marriage-minded single women to get married.

Not all women naturally fit into the gender complementarian ideal, which means they may not get married, if everyone insists all women must be gender comp to merit marriage. (The Bible does not hold up women being passive or being gender complementarian to merit a husband; it is church members who promote this false view.)

(Link): Why Are So Many Single Women Leaving the Church? by K. Gaddini

Excerpts:

…. It turns out that in both countries, single Christian women are leaving churches at increasingly high rates. In the UK, one study showed that single women are the most likely group to leave Christianity.

In the US, the numbers tell a similar story.

Of course, there is a distinction between leaving church and leaving Christianity, and these studies do not make the difference clear.

Regardless, leaving – whether it be your congregation or your faith — is a difficult decision. Women stand to lose their friends, their sense of identity, their community and, in some cases, even their family. And yet, many are doing it anyway.

What or who is driving them out?

Continue reading “Why Are So Many Single Women Leaving the Church? by K. Gaddini”

Let’s Stop Praising Men Who Deign To Date Women Almost Their Own Age by B. Ellen

Let’s Stop Praising Men Who Deign To Date Women Almost Their Own Age by B. Ellen

(Link): Let’s Stop Praising Men Who Deign To Date Women Almost Their Own Age by B. Ellen

Excerpts:

Nov 9, 2019

Sexual politics hasn’t really evolved much if Keanu Reeves is hailed as a feminist

Keanu Reeves comes across as a sweetheart, but I’m not sure he actually deserves a sainthood for dating artist Alexandra Grant, who, at 46, is still nine years younger than him.

Nevertheless, their recent appearance on the red carpet (Grant, elegant with natural grey hair) was hailed as refreshing, even groundbreaking.

So it goes with the twisted maths of male-female age-appropriateness, especially in Hollywood – a man seen with anyone who isn’t half his age is hailed as a feminist god walking among us.

But why wouldn’t Reeves date Grant? She appears to be smart, talented, fun, a catch. But this is beyond one couple – this is about the gender politics of success and how society tells successful men that they “deserve” not only a beautiful, but also a much younger woman.

…Then there’s that other kind of age gap, with the freaky gendered socioeconomic dimension – where snagging a much younger woman becomes as much a signifier of male success as a mansion or a Porsche.

Here, the younger woman is less a human being than a male acquisition or achievement. I always wondered why some men were forever moaning nastily about gold-diggers.

…For women, the rules are different. Helena Bonham Carter has just been in the news with a much younger partnerand you’d have thought that witchcraft (bubbling cauldrons, the lot) must have been involved for this 53-year-old to lure this younger man into her aged lair. It barely matters that Bonham Carter is beautiful, talented and successful. That, these days, she’d be called a cougar rather than a crone. Still, society decrees that a woman’s status is rarely improved by her having a much younger male partner; if anything, it’s sacrificed.


Related:

(Link):  Study:  Big Gaps in Age Can Turn A Marriage Sour in Just Six Years

(Link): Younger Women Tend To Marry Older Men in the U.S. – But That’s Finally Changing by Dan Kopf (2018 Article)

(Link): Thirty Year Old Man Likes To Date and Have Sex with 80, 90 Year Old Women

(Link): “Dear Therapist: I’m Dating a Divorced Man With Kids, and It’s Harder Than I Thought – His Ex Wife Calls Constantly” (She Needs To Dump This Guy)

(Link):  Stop Telling Women Their Most Valuable Asset Is Their Youth

(Link):  Thirty Year Old Man Likes To Date and Have Sex with 80, 90 Year Old Women

(Link): Girlfriend, 26, Chops Off Her 40 Year Old Boyfriend’s Penis With Garden Shears

(Link): Woman Burned To Death For Refusing Marriage Proposal To A Man Over Half Her Age

(Link): What Is The #HusbandNotDad (hash tag)? Down The Rabbit Hole Of An Unlikely Hashtag by P. Frank

(Link):  Dear Abby: I Gave Up Dating, and 30 Years Later, I’m Lonely – letter from self-professing 70 year old guy who is overweight, says he prefers younger women and does not want to date women his own age

(Link):  Wife’s Shock As Husband, 26, Is Caught Cheating With a 72-Year-Old Lover at Premier Inn

(Link):  ‘I Want My 2.3 Bonus Years’ – A.K.A., ‘Where do 50-year-old men get the strange impression that they could date a 23-year-old?’ by Mona Chalabi

(Link): What It’s Really Like to Be a Guy Who Only Dates Much Older Women by L. Moore 

(Link): French Author Yann Moix, 50, Says Women Over 50 Are ‘Invisible’ To Him

(Link): Men Become ‘Invisible’ And Lose Sex Appeal At 39 – Article from Daily Caller

(Link): A 69 Year Old Man Wants to Self Identify as a 40-Something to Increase His Chances on Dating Sites

(Link):  How Dating In Your 40s Is Nothing Like Dating In Your 20s – via NY Post – A Secular Editorial Grasps what Married Christian Relationship Advice Givers Do Not

(Link): Ageism Vs. Age Preferences and Creepy Older Men (critique of post at another blog) 

(Link): The Bigger the Age Gap The Shorter The Marriage  / Divorce Rates Predicted By Age Differences

(Link): Avoid Dating Divorced Guys Who Are Dating on the Rebound – and Icky May December Relationships

(Link): Obnoxious, Condescending, Sexist, Pervy Esquire Editorial by 50-Something Year Old Man: “In Praise of 42 Year Old Women” – Condescendingly Reassures 40 Something Women He’d Sex Them Up

(Link): Follow Up – Reactions by Other Writers to Sexist, Condescending 50 Something Men Who Think They Are Final Arbiters of If Women Are Attractive Past Age of 40 (Re: Esquire Editorial by Junod)

(Link): Follow Up Part 2 – Reactions by Other Writers to Sexist, Condescending 50 Something Men Who Think They Are Final Arbiters of If Women Are Attractive Past Age of 40 (Re: Esquire Editorial by Junod)

(Link): Online Dating: Women Want Younger Men (article)

(Link): Christian Males Blaming their Unwanted Protracted Singleness on Feminism – They have the wrong target

(Link): Couple Says 30-Year Age Gap Means Hotter Sex (*Barf*)

(Link): Creepizoids Weirdos and Perverts on Dating Sites

My Thoughts Regarding the Editorial: Sex & The Single Pastor by Rod Dreher

My Thoughts Regarding the Editorial: Sex & The Single Pastor by Rod Dreher

The following editorial by Rod Dreher is about a liberal Luthern preacher named Nadia Bolz Weber who recently had a bunch of women’s “sexual purity rings” melted down to have an artist form them into the shape of a vagina.

Bolz Weber also released a new book about sex called “Shameless.” It’s an anti-Purity Culture book.

The author of this essay, Dreher, refers readers of his piece to (Link): this page (“The Luthern Pastor Calling For a Sexual Revolution”) at the New Yorker about Bolz Weber.

I was a devout Christian for many years, and that is one reason among a few as to why I remain a virgin past the age of 45.

That’s right, I’ve never had sex – because I was waiting until I got married to have sex, but I never found the right guy to marry.

I have spent a few years blogging here pointing out how nobody but nobody respects adult virginity or celibacy.

Many conservatives and Christians mock and insult adult celibacy and virginity, not just “sex positive” feminists or liberals.

As a matter of fact, a lot of Christians (and secular conservatives) view marriage to be the norm, and as something that can “fix” society, so they shame or insult anyone who remains single past the page of 30, whether that singleness is due to choice or circumstance. (I have examples of this sort of thing in older posts on this blog.)

Continue reading “My Thoughts Regarding the Editorial: Sex & The Single Pastor by Rod Dreher”

Younger Women Tend To Marry Older Men in the U.S. That’s Finally Changing by Dan Kopf (2018 Article)

Younger Women Tend To Marry Older Men in the U.S. That’s Finally Changing by Dan Kopf (2018 Article)

(Link): Younger Women Tend To Marry Older Men in the U.S. That’s Finally Changing by Dan Kopf – October 2018

Excerpts:

In August 2018, the Indian actress Priyanka Chopra announced she was engaged to the American pop singer Nick Jonas. The 36-year-old Chopra is more than 10 years older than Jonas, who just turned 26. According to friends, Jonas likes it that way, as he prefers older women.

Increasingly, he is not alone.

Continue reading “Younger Women Tend To Marry Older Men in the U.S. That’s Finally Changing by Dan Kopf (2018 Article)”

French Author Yann Moix, 50, Says Women Over 50 Are ‘Invisible’ To Him

French Author Yann Moix, 50, Says Women Over 50 Are ‘Invisible’ To Him

Before I get to the article about this person, here are a couple of related ones:

(Link): Men Become ‘Invisible’ And Lose Sex Appeal At 39 – Article from Daily Caller

(Link): Online Dating: Women Want Younger Men (article)

I’m not 50 years old – the big 5-0 is a few years away for me – but – I have no desire to date people such as this Moix guy, who is, I think over age 50 himself. I’ve seen his photo on sites – he is not attractive.

When I was in my 20s, I was creeped out by any guy more than five years my senior who took a fancy to me. And I sometimes, yes, had guys older than me hit on me. It was gross.

I wonder if this guy actually gets any dates with anyone?

Here’s the article:

(Link): French Author Yann Moix, 50, Says Women Over 50 Are ‘Invisible’ To Him

Yann Moix’s comments about being “incapable” of loving women over his own age has sparked furious backlash online.

A prize-winning French author faced backlash online after he reportedly declared he was “incapable” of loving women over the age of 50 because they are “too old” and “invisible” to him.

Yann Moix, who is 50 himself, told Marie Claire magazine’s French edition that he preferred the bodies of younger women, according to multiple media reports.

Continue reading “French Author Yann Moix, 50, Says Women Over 50 Are ‘Invisible’ To Him”

A 69 Year Old Man Wants to Self Identify as a 40-Something to Increase His Chances on Dating Sites

A 69 Year Old Man Wants to Self Identify as a 40-Something to Increase His Chances on Dating Sites

(Post Updated Below, December 2018)

I wonder if this man, named Ratelband, is like 99% of men – a sexist ass clown, who, despite being 60-something, only wants to date 20 -something women?

This man says in one of these articles that when he joins dating sites and states his age as 60-something that he gets no responses, but I bet he does – probably from other 60- something women, but he probably only wants to date 21 year old women.

Most men are sexist, ageist douche canoes like that; they don’t want to date women their own age, nope; they feel entitled to women 10 or more years their junior.

(By the way, this dude thinks he has the face of a 40-something (he says so in one of the articles)? I am currently in my 40s as I compose this post, and no, honey, you don’t look like a 40-something man. You don’t even appear to be an attractive 60 something man, sorry.)

(Link): Man, 69, sues to lower age 20 years: ‘You can change your gender. Why not your age?’

Excerpts:

Ratelband cites several reasons as to why he wants to lower his age from 69 years to 49 years.

The Dutchman, who is a motivational speaker and media personality in the Netherlands, says that he’d likely have better luck dating, gaining employment, and making large purchases, such as homes or vehicles, if he were younger on paper.

…Ratelband adds, “When I’m on Tinder [dating site] and it says I’m 69, I don’t get an answer. When I’m 49, with the face I have, I will be in a luxurious position.”

“You can change your name. You can change your gender. Why not your age?” he asks.

Continue reading “A 69 Year Old Man Wants to Self Identify as a 40-Something to Increase His Chances on Dating Sites”

60 Year Old, Never- Married Woman Asks Christian TV Host Pat Robertson If Some Are Just Not Meant to Marry

60 Year Old, Never- Married Woman Asks Christian TV Host Pat Robertson If Some Are Just Not Meant to Marry

Below, in this post, is a video on You Tube, via ‘700 Club,’ uploaded on October 25, 2018, in which a 60 year old woman says she “never found a godly man to marry” and her church never has any men her age there.

She asks Robertson if some people are just never meant to marry.

As I’ve been saying on this blog for ages now, you cannot count on God, prayer, churches or Christians to fix you up with a spouse, because they won’t (churches will even shame and scold you for asking).

The woman says she’s never found a “godly” man to marry – I think that is Christian code-speak for “I haven’t found a Christian man to marry.” This woman has probably been brain-washed into accepting (Link): the “Equally Yoked” teaching.

Single ladies, if you are Christian and want marriage, the numbers are stacked against you, as I’ve explained in numerous posts before. You need to get away from this “I must marry a  Christian and only a Christian” belief, or you will end up in your 40s, never married like me, or like this 60 year old woman.

It’s better to find a kind-hearted, loving Non-Christian man to marry than end up at 60 never having been married because you could not find a compatible Christian man – there are no single Christian men in churches for you to meet and marry who are over age 30 and under age 80. They don’t attend church.

Continue reading “60 Year Old, Never- Married Woman Asks Christian TV Host Pat Robertson If Some Are Just Not Meant to Marry”

Dear Abby: I Gave Up Dating, and 30 Years Later, I’m Lonely

Dear Abby: I Gave Up Dating, and 30 Years Later, I’m Lonely

This post has been edited to add even more reader comments from other sites that published this Abby letter. Virtually nobody is sympathetic with this guy.


I was genuinely feeling empathy and sympathy for this dude, right up until this phrase in his letter to Dear Abby:

I’m not attracted to women my age, and I don’t see younger women being attracted to an overweight old guy…”

Die alone, ageist rat bastard!

You’re in your 70s, by your own admission, you’re dumpy- or tubby- looking and don’t have a great income, but you pine after some 20, 30, or 40 or 50 year old hottie? (And I bet this sexist pig jerk expects any chick he dates to not only be younger but very thin, too.)

Oh get bent, ten times over!

Continue reading “Dear Abby: I Gave Up Dating, and 30 Years Later, I’m Lonely”

Sick, Dying, and Raped in America’s Nursing Homes

Sick, Dying, and Raped in America’s Nursing Homes

American churches continue to fixate upon youth. They are always chasing after kids or college-aged people.

Meanwhile, the elderly face their own set of problems and issues, but do churches care? No.

The elderly can be just as vulnerable as children, in that some of them are frail or they have dementia.

Senior citizens needed to be cared for and advocated for just as much as any infant or child, but I rarely see Christians show as much interest in helping them as I do them looking after abused, poor, or neglected babies and children.

(Link): Sick, Dying, and Raped in America’s Nursing Homes

by Blake Ellis

Some of the victims can’t speak. They rely on walkers and wheelchairs to leave their beds. They have been robbed of their memories. They come to nursing homes to be cared for.

Instead, they are sexually assaulted.

The unthinkable is happening at facilities throughout the country: Vulnerable seniors are being raped and sexually abused by the very people paid to care for them.

It’s impossible to know just how many victims are out there. But through an exclusive analysis of state and federal data and interviews with experts, regulators and the families of victims, CNN has found that this little-discussed issue is more widespread than anyone would imagine.

Continue reading “Sick, Dying, and Raped in America’s Nursing Homes”

‘I Want My 2.3 Bonus Years’ – A.K.A., ‘Where do 50-year-old men get the strange impression that they could date a 23-year-old?’ by Mona Chalabi

‘I Want My 2.3 Bonus Years’ – A.K.A., ‘Where do 50-year-old men get the strange impression that they could date a 23-year-old?’ by Mona Chalabi

The Tweet from the NT Times had this as a heading: ‘Where do 50-year-old men get the strange impression that they could date a 23-year-old?’

As you should already be aware, I (Link): do not support people of either biological sex dating people much older or younger than themselves. I’m a big believer that May-December relationships are gross and disgusting, and people should date with a five year limit (five yrs older or younger than their own age).

Basically, this appears to be a half-way decent editorial, though the author jokingly disparages celibacy in it, unfortunately.

(Link): ‘I Want My 2.3 Bonus Years’ – AKA, ‘ Where do 50-year-old men get the strange impression that they could date a 23-year-old?’

Excerpts-

…Most men who date women don’t fantasize about what they would do if they had these bonus years, they simply get them. In two-thirds of heterosexual couples, the man is at least a year older than his partner. The average age difference is (Link): 2.3 years according to the Census Bureau.

…The fact that women end the childless part of our lives earlier than our male partners is just salt in the wound. And looking even farther down the line, the bigger the age difference, the more likely that it will be women who take care of their male partners in old age.

…This arrogance [by men regarding cavalier attitudes about marrying] has, as I see it, two main causes — one, a belief that their spermatozoa are good for a very long time, indeed, and two, a belief that they could get a younger woman if they wanted to.

Let me examine the evidence for each of those male beliefs; fertility first.

Continue reading “‘I Want My 2.3 Bonus Years’ – A.K.A., ‘Where do 50-year-old men get the strange impression that they could date a 23-year-old?’ by Mona Chalabi”

Woman Boss at Thinx Company Accused of Sexual Harassment

Woman Boss at Thinx Company Accused of Sexual Harassment

I often see secular, left wing feminists deny that women can be terrible to women on the job. Of course, men can sometimes be horrible to other employees.

But in my time in the working world, while I was subjected to a few male jerks here and there, I also had to deal with rude, harassing, or awful female co-workers or female bosses. One of the all-time worse workplace bullying I ever encountered was at the hands of a FEMALE boss, not a male.

It’s a fact that there is such a thing as women bosses or women co-workers who harass other women workers, but feminists are loathe to admit this, because they seem to feel it bolsters sexist claims by men against women in the workplace.

The woman boss in this news report sounds absolutely disgusting and like a lunatic. And a control freak.

Also, it is sad to note that this supposedly “feminist” type company was AGEIST! They were ageist against any woman over the age of 29.

All the young ladies in this company, the ones being stalked by this perverted and creepy-sounding  boss, should read the book “Boundaries” and related material.

(Link):  Sexual-Harassment Claims Against a ‘She-E.O.’

Excerpts

Miki Agrawal, the co-founder of Thinx — a company that makes “period underwear” — doesn’t think much of boundaries. “I just love the taboo space,” she told New York last year, of her mission to (profitably) destigmatize menstruation. And in a promotional video for the product, she said, “My favorite thing to talk about are the things you’re not supposed to talk about.”

According to a complaint filed late last week by a former employee (and echoed in interviews with multiple current and former employees), those things have included: the size and shape of her employees’ breasts, an employee’s nipple piercings, her own sexual exploits, her desire to experiment with polyamory, her interest in entering a sexual relationship with one of her employees, and the exact means by which she was brought to female ejaculation.

Continue reading “Woman Boss at Thinx Company Accused of Sexual Harassment”