I Liked A ‘High-Value’ Man’s Photo on a Dating App – He Rejected Me Because I’m ‘Fat’ by A. Diaz

I Liked A ‘High-Value’ Man’s Photo on a Dating App – He Rejected Me Because I’m ‘Fat’ by A. Diaz

I feel for this lady. This man who contacted her on this dating app sounds like a narcissistic, arrogant, entitled douche.

This woman doesn’t strike me as being like the entitled, obese, progressive “body positivity” or “fat acceptance” women who say bizarre things – like dieting is a part of white supremacy – and who demand that thin men date them.

The woman in the story below does appear to be on the large size (there were photos of her on the page), but she doesn’t have an entitled “attitude,” so, IMO, the guy who texted her back was being unnecessarily rude about the whole thing – he’s also a flaming A-hole and someone should kick him in the balls repeatedly for how he thinks about women, and how he treated this particular woman.

Amended this post to add the following observations:
The article says she met this guy on a “Christian” dating app (Plenty of Fish). I want to educate the married Christians out there, who keep hyping “Christian dating sites” to their lonely heart single friends: stop doing it because “Christian dating sites” are also filled with jerks, abusers, and rapists.

Years ago, I was on a few dating web sites, one of which was considered to be “Christian,” and the so-called self professing Christian men on those sites who approached me were gross, their profiles were peppered with inappropriate sexual talk
– I may blog here about sexual topics (and get quite frank about it), but when I’m on a dating site, I don’t want to see sex jokes or smutty humor on a guy’s profile, nor do I openly and frankly discuss sex-related stuff on any of my old dating site profiles, nor did I engage in “smutty” humor talk with any of the men who contacted me (I kept things clean).

There have been news stories in the last ten years of MARRIED Christian men (with HIV and AIDS) who lie and say they’re single and then meet single women on dating sites, some of which are “Christian” dating sites.

There was a serial rapist who said he was a Christian to women he met on dating sites, but once he’d get to know them and then meet them in person, he’d rape them (here’s one post on my blog about that).

So… secular and “Christian” dating sites and dating apps are not guarantees for meeting quality, up-standing, loving men. Meaning, you idiot Christian married couples out there need to stop dishing out the simplistic advice of “Just join Plenty of Fish or eHarmony to get a Christian spouse!” – we singles have tried that, and for a lot of us, those sites have NOT worked.

(Link): I liked a ‘high-value’ man’s photo on a dating app — he rejected me because I’m ‘fat’

Dec 8, 2022
By Adriana Diaz

A plus-size mom claims she was harassed last month by a man on a dating app with self-proclaimed “above average” looks and “high values.”

“It was so ridiculous that it was comical,” Krista Brown told Kennedy News.

Brown, 36, said she downloaded the Christian dating app Plenty of Fish in November after being single for three years. She was unprepared for the cringeworthy communications she said she received from a match who turned out to be a mismatch.

The Minnesota budget support specialist recalled thinking the cyberspace Casanova was “kind of cute” despite his “pathetic mustache.” She claims she swiped right, but didn’t message him. She says the unidentified man reached out to her — in a big way.

“He sent me a whole huge, long paragraph asking why I think I’m worthy of dating him, and what do I bring to the equation? He had a very condescending tone. He was so absolutely ridiculous,” she lamented.

UK Mom Admits to Killing Teen Daughter by Letting Her Get Morbidly Obese

UK Mom Admits to Killing Teen Daughter by Letting Her Get Morbidly Obese

This is an update to a news story I blogged about months ago (here).

(Link):  Mother admits killing her disabled 16-year-old daughter by allowing her to become morbidly obese

A mother has admitted killing her disabled teenage daughter by allowing her to become morbidly obese.

Kaylea Titford, 16, was found dead at her home in Newtown, Powys, on October 10, 2020, having suffered from health problems linked to her obesity.

(Link): UK mom admits to killing teen daughter by letting her get morbidly obese

by Lee Brown
Dec 20, 2022

A UK mom has admitted to killing her teenage daughter by allowing her to become morbidly obese.

Sarah Lloyd-Jones, 39, pleaded guilty to gross negligence manslaughter and allowing the death of a child for failing to care for daughter Kaylea Titford, 16, according to Wales News Service.

The wheelchair-bound teen was found dead in bed in her family’s home in Wales in October 2020 — having suffered “multiple medical issues,” including spina bifida, the report said.

Wife Asks If It Is Okay To Warn Husband That She Will Leave Him If He Becomes More Obese – Yes, Complementarians, Women Are Visually Oriented Too!

Wife Asks If It Is Okay To Warn Husband That She Will Leave Him If He Becomes More Obese – Yes, Complementarians, Women Are Visually Oriented Too!

Not only will many people find too much excess weight horrible to look at, but being overweight can result in life-shortening medical conditions.

The thinner spouse may end up being the “care taker” to the fat spouse – that is not a role I would want for myself.

A lot of women are visually oriented and care about what a man looks like, but Christian Gender Complementarians have un-biblical, incorrect teachings and assumptions that God “wired” men to be visual, that women only care about “emotional connection” and not what a guy looks like – FALSE!

Women DO CARE about what their male partner looks like.

The woman in the following example says she “doesn’t care” about what her husband looks like, but she isn’t quite clear on this point, because she says when they first met, her spouse lifted weights regularly and stayed in shape – I am not clear if she means she was okay with the way he looked initially, but now she’s not, or what.

(Link): Wife Asks If It Is Okay To Warn Husband That She Will Leave Him If He Becomes More Obese

by Jurgita Dominauskaitė and Saulė Tolstych
Dec 2022

The traditional vow the bride and the groom give one another goes something like this: “I take you to be my wife/husband, to have and to hold from this day forward, for better, for worse, for richer, for poorer, in sickness and in health, to love and to cherish, until parted by death.”

But what if you are really annoyed that your spouse is getting sick and they aren’t doing anything to prevent it when they can?

Is that enough of a reason to leave them? This woman online asks the internet if she would be unreasonable to threaten to divorce her husband if he became morbidly obese.

More info: Mumsnet [I want to tell my husband I will divorce him if he gains a lot more weight]

Woman noticed her husband has been gaining weight and wants to tell him that if he ends up like his dad, she will leave him

The Original Poster (OP) has a father-in-law who is morbidly obese and has so much excess weight that he finds it hard to walk. This concept is hard for the woman to wrap her head around as she likes to be active and couldn’t imagine doing that to one’s body.

‘1000-Lb. Sisters’ ‘ Tammy Slaton Weds Caleb Willingham at Ohio Rehab Center: ‘I’m Married’

‘1000-Lb. Sisters’ ‘ Tammy Slaton Weds Caleb Willingham at Ohio Rehab Center: ‘I’m Married’

I think most people would be reluctant to marry an extremely overweight person, but this very heavy lady got married.

(Link): ‘1000-Lb. Sisters’ ‘ Tammy Slaton Weds Caleb Willingham at Ohio Rehab Center: ‘I’m Married’

The TV star and her now-husband met at the rehab center and eventually fell in love at the same location

By Emily Strohm and Brenton Blanchet
Nov 20, 2022

Tammy Slaton is now a married woman!

The 1000-Lb. Sisters star, 36, tied the knot with husband Caleb Willingham on Saturday at Windsor Lane Rehabilitation Center in Gibsonburg, Ohio, PEOPLE can exclusively reveal.

“You all knew me as Tammy Slaton, but now you’ll all know me as Mrs. Tammy Willingham,” Tammy says. “I’m married now!”

Slaton and Willingham, 39, met at the rehab center and eventually fell in love at the same location, before inviting 30 friends and family members to the small celebration on Saturday, a TLC source shares.

30 Horrible Dates Whose Entitlement Is Through The Roof

30 Horrible Dates Whose Entitlement Is Through The Roof 

I am not about to copy all 30 items, so please use the link provided to visit their page if you’d like to see all 30.

As to one of the examples on the page, where the European guy tells his lady date she might be attractive if she only lost some weight – one of my friends went through this.

This friend of mine was trying dating sites in the late 1990s or early 2000s, and one of the guys she met at a dinner date, via this dating site she was using, actually told her if she wanted to date him, she’d have to lose weight.

This seems to be a somewhat common attitude by men who meet women on dates – tell them if they’d only change “X” about themselves (usually, it’s lose weight), they’d be attractive and worthy of a relationship.

This is a huge red flag. Most women who hear this will not date such a guy further.

I myself am a visually oriented woman who am not attracted to fatties, so my preference is to date in-shape guys

Therefore, I don’t have a problem per se with people who aren’t comfortable dating chubbies or fatsos, but if that’s you, you shouldn’t accept a date with an overweight person on a site only to spring this preference on them when you meet them in-person on a date, and tell them, “You know, I’d totally enter into a relationship with you if ONLY you’d lose weight,” for god’s sake!

If you can tell from the person’s dating app photo that they’re overweight in their dating site / app photos, then don’t approach them on the site for a date in real life, moron!

(Link): 30 Horrible Dates Whose Entitlement Is Through The Roof 

by Ieva Gailiūtė and Austėja Akavickaitė

Dating is complicated. After all, being selective has never been easier with the myriad of dating apps and websites that let you filter people based on their descriptions.

But let’s say you decide to go for it.

You message back and forth, awkwardly wait to be asked out, think of different conversation starters… only to discover that the person you’re interested in is way too picky to begin with.

So today, we’re diving into the not-so-pleasant incidents where people ran into dates who were ridiculously entitled. From insisting you own waterfront property to demanding a free Korean BBQ dinner, some people have unrealistically high standards.

We have combed through the internet and collected some of the best stories of people who think they inherently deserve more than anyone else…

#2 Guy Went On One Date With A Girl, Waited 3 Months Of No Contact Before Deciding To Pick Out Every Insecurity She Probably Has About Herself. Claims She Hurt His Ego, Then Proceeds To (Kind Of) Ask For A Second Date

Hello [name redacted]. I know we went on a date quite a while ago now but I’d like to explain why I haven’t messaged you.

I feel like you could have made the date much better, here’s a few reasons why. I apologize if I offend you

• • If you lost some weight you would look incredible. Maybe about a stone or so
  • You are very pale. I know you aren’t a fan of the sun but a bit of a fake tan won’t hurt
  • You have quite big boobs so you should show off cleavage more
  • I think you need to wear clothes that suit your figure and maybe update your style slightly. Just so I’m not embarrassed to be seen with you
  • You need to dye your hair a normal colour and add extensions. Longer hair is much more attractive 😍

Yet Another Fat Lady Video – Fat Lady Says You Must Find Fat People Attractive or Else You Are “Racist” -Are Fat People Trying to Date Skinny People?

Yet Another Fat Lady Video – Fat Lady Says You Must Find Fat People Attractive or Else You Are “Racist” -Are Fat People Trying to Date Skinny People?

So, another fat lady uploaded a video of herself saying if you don’t find fat people attractive, you are racist.

This reminds me of the man-baby, bitter, sexist Incels of today, and the regular old school, 90 pound, weakling really dorky and nerdy men from the 1990s and earlier, who cannot get dates, who feel entitled to date 21 year old beautiful, thin fashion models.

This also reminds me of the “transwomen” (some of whom even still have a penis attached) who demand that cis lesbian, or cis hetero women date them, and if those women say “No,” the men (who are “transwomen”) spend hours per day on Twitter sending death threats to these women, or ones like them.

What do all these types of people have in common? Here’s what:
Delusion, an excessive amount of entitlement, and an unwillingness to accept reality – and an inability to handle rejection well.

Are the fat women making these videos saying you MUST date fat people aiming to date skinny people? Is that who these videos are aimed at?

The Obese, Overly Hairy ‘Erotic Eater’ Guy Should Be The Final Nail in the Coffin of Sexist Complementarian Teachings that Looks Matter Only To Men

The Obese, Overly Hairy ‘Erotic Eater’ Guy Should Be The Final Nail in the Coffin of Sexist Complementarian Teachings that Looks Matter Only To Men & That Women Are Oblivious To, or Don’t Care About, What Men Look Like

I am an ex-complementarian (yes, I am, read more about that (Link): here if you so choose).

I’m very aware of what complementarians teach and believe on many topics.

Many complementarians wrongly believe that women lack sexual drive, an interest in sex, and that women don’t care about what men look like.

Complementarians operate in this very strange worldview that only men are “visual.” The Bible does not teach that God created men to be visual or to have more of a sex drive than women, but Complementarians act as though it does. These views permeate their blogs, pod casts, books, sermons, and so on.

So, under complementarian teachings, women are often shamed and scolded about their physical appearance.

I’ve seldom heard complementarians tell male listeners or male readers to join a gym, work out, and get in shape so that they will be physically and visually appealing to women.

(Edit, Side Note:
Complementarians seem to assume that all single women are only interested in a man’s bank account. No, we’re not.

But there’s nothing wrong with wanting to marry a guy who has a steady job, steady pay check, who is financially responsible.

I was engaged to a man who took financial advantage of me for years. Most women I know were dating or married to men who refused to get jobs, so the women had to earn a pay check.

These women’s husbands would sit about the house all day in their underpants playing Playstation video games or watching sports.

I’ve never personally run across too many female gold diggers in my time, only one – the rest of the gold diggers I’ve met or known personally have been MEN who were leeching off their wives or girlfriends.

At any rate, complementarians wrongly assume that all women are obsessed with  looking for a husband or boyfriend with a very large income or expensive sports car, so they are always telling us women to “stop judging a man by his income or what kind of car he drives, and instead, focus on how much he loves Jesus.”

Well, I hate to break it to you complementarians, but some us ladies are busy checking out if the guy has great abs and muscular arms or not – we aren’t as obsessed with his credit score, car, or savings and investments as you may assume.)

No, the sexist complementarians reserve that rhetoric for women.

But women do notice and care about what men look like, as I’ve blogged about years ago in a series of posts, such as (Link): this one or (Link): this one.

(Even the (Link): Bible mentions women noticing hot looking men and getting turned on by them, but per usual, complementarians ignore or do not mention parts of the Bible that don’t fit their backwards views.)

All of that brings me to this…

The other day, I was scrolling down my Twitter page and saw this headline from The Daily Mail:

(Link): ‘Erotic weight gainer’ who tips the scales at 500lbs reveals he eats 10,000 calories a day to maintain his ‘ball gut’ and keep his OnlyFans followers entertained

Here are some excerpts:

A 500lb OnlyFans influencer who found a lucrative niche within the fat fetish community has revealed he has to eat around 10,000 calories a day to maintain his ‘ball gut’ and keep his followers entertained.

Dear Advice Lady: My Boyfriend is a Fattie and I Feel Like His Mom

Dear Advice Lady: My Boyfriend is a Fattie and I Feel Like His Mom

About the letter below that some woman in a troubled relationship wrote to an advice columnist:

I just love how so many men fool themselves into thinking that women don’t care about what men look like – because we do.

This is ten times more true in Christian culture, especially within churches and denominations that teach that sexist, idiotic “complementarianism” drivel, where the pastors will browbeat the women to stay thin and pretty because supposedly all men are visually “wired by God”
(note: no, they’re not; men are socially conditioned by culture, including Playboy magazine, on what to find attractive in women),
so Christians guilt and pressure Christian women into starving themselves and being obsessed with their looks.

Ask Amy: Wife Says She Is Turned Off By Husband’s Fat Body and Muffin Top

Ask Amy: Wife Says She Is Turned Off By Husband’s Fat Body and Muffin Top

I am publishing this to disprove one or two common stereotypes among conservative Christians: that women are not interested in sex, and women are not “visually oriented.”

Here we have an example of a woman who is sexually turned off by the sight of her husband’s obese body and muffin top. Women do in fact pay attention to what men look like and DO CARE about what men look like, though I’d have to say women are a lot less strict and picky about the looks.

Women might be willing to date a “so-so” looking man, so long as he compensates in other areas, like, he treats her really well, or he has a great sense of humor.

But women do notice and care about what men look like, and women can and do get turned off by flabby male bodies, receding hairlines, and so on.

Letter to Ask Amy advice columnist (Sept 2016):

Dear Amy:

How do I tell the man in my life that his huge muffin top is a turn off for me? He is more than plump, Amy, he is obese.

He blames his diabetes on the fact that he cannot satisfy me sexually, but I maintain that it is his obesity that is the reason he has diabetes.

I do not want to insult him or cause him any embarrassment, but I need to get across to him that he has to lose at least 30 to 40 pounds. Even his daughter gives him grief about his weight.

Please tell me how to talk to him without hurting his feelings.

— Diabetes

You can read Amy’s reply (Link): here or (Link): here

---

Related Posts:

(Link): The Obese, Overly Hairy ‘Erotic Eater’ Guy Should Be The Final Nail in the Coffin of Sexist Complementarian Teachings that Looks Matter Only To Men & That Women Are Oblivious To, or Don’t Care About, What Men Look Like

(Link):  Men, This Woke Lady Wants You to know You’re “Fatphobic” If You Refuse To Go Out With Her – by NTB Staff

(Link): Dear Advice Lady: My Boyfriend is a Fattie and I Feel Like His Mom

Hollywood Men: It’s No Longer About Your Acting, It’s About Your Abs (article about how male actors are now valued for being eye candy)

Hollywood Men: It’s No Longer About Your Acting, It’s About Your Abs

If society is not going to stop being so judgmental against women in regards to their physical appearance, I am happy to see that the same pressure is being applied to males now.

This actually is a trend that is several years old. Several years ago, I started seeing more and more articles about how men are being judged almost as harshly as women are in regards to looks, age, and weight.

More males are going in for cosmetic surgery, and not just on their faces, but they are doing things like getting “pec implants.” More and more males are developing eating disorders at younger and younger ages.

(Link): Hollywood Men: It’s No Longer About Your Acting, It’s About Your Abs

But what’s really interesting is the fact that for decades in the entertainment industry, women were the ones expected to be the eye candy. Years and years and years of young, thin but curvy starlets draped over leading men. Somehow, though we’ve made progress in terms of using ladies for window dressing, instead of arriving in a place where it’s less about aesthetics, it’s men who are being held to new, unrealistic standards. Hill says that recently, “a major production was pushed back several weeks when the star told producers he needed more time before he could go shirtless.”

(Link): Building a Bigger Action Hero

By Logan Hill May 2014
A mere six-pack doesn’t cut it in Hollywood anymore. Today’s male stars need 5 percent body fat, massive pecs, and the much-coveted inguinal crease – regardless of what it takes to get there.
——————————
Acting skill – even paired with leading-man looks and undeniable charisma – is not enough to get you cast in a big-budget spy thriller or a Marvel Comics franchise.

For much of Hollywood history, only women’s bodies were objectified to such absurd degrees. Now objectification makes no gender distinctions: Male actors’ bare asses are more likely to be shot in sex scenes; their vacation guts and poolside man boobs are as likely to command a sneering full-page photo in a celebrity weekly’s worst-bodies feature, or go viral as a source of Web ridicule.

A sharply defined inguinal crease – the twin ligaments hovering above the hips that point toward a man’s junk – is as coveted as double-D cleavage.

Muscle matters more than ever, as comic-book franchises swallow up the box office, in the increasingly critical global market. (Hot bodies and explosions don’t need subtitles.)

Thor-like biceps and Captain America pecs are simply a job requirement; even “serious” actors who never aspired to mega-stardom are being told they need a global franchise to prove their bankability and land Oscar-caliber parts.

…To get that hungry look, trainers stress calorie-conscious diets and exercises that pump up fat-burning metabolism. No actor can gain 10 pounds of muscle in a six-week period, but he can lean down to reveal the muscle underneath.

Testosterone-Deficient Gamma Male Whines About the ‘Friend Zone’ (post from The Other McCain) – AKA, Ugly, Fat, Weird, Awkward, or Poor Nice Guys Who Unrealistically Expect to Attract Rich, Pretty, Thin, Socially Normal Women

Testosterone-Deficient Gamma Male Whines About the ‘Friend Zone’ (post from The Other McCain)

I have blogged on this before: Men who complain they cannot get girlfriends and yet, they say, they are so darn “nice.”

I’ve also noticed, like the author of The Other McCain blog, that quite often, many men are unrealistic about women, or the kind of women they can hope to attract:

A fat, ugly, stupid, impoverished man, who is a “one” or “two” on a scale of desirability of 1 to 10 (with one being loser and ten being a winner), will keep seeking out women to date who are above a “5.”

Such men will go after 9’s and 10’s, even.

Such entitled ugly, stupid, and poor men do not seem to realize they are doomed to live life alone unless they lower their expectations.

If you are a 46 year old, 500 pound, bald, toothless man, guess what? A woman who is 24 years old, with big boobs, a tiny waist, and of super model good looks, is NOT going to sleep with you, date you, or marry you.

Accept the reality and start seeking out women on YOUR LEVEL: other 46 year olds who are chunky and missing teeth. Then and only then you might start hitting it off with the ladies.

Here’s the post:
(Link): Testosterone-Deficient Gamma Male Whines About the ‘Friend Zone’ (post from The Other McCain)

• Chris Tognotti offers a lesson in Darwinian selection by the obverse example of

How to Fail:
Why Don’t Women Like Me Back?

(Link): Being the Guy Who’s Just a Friend (Why Don’t Women Like Me Back? On Always Being the Guy Who’s Just a Friend)

Excerpts -McCain starts off quoting Tognotti:

Hello. My name is Christopher Tognotti, and I’m no good with women.

This is a slight generalization, perhaps, but that’s how it feels.

Whether I’ve been bright-eyed or gloomy, fat or slender, young(er) or old(er), the ladies have never seemed to love me quite as much as I love them. My days as a fit gym employee involved no more fulfilled loves than my days now as a portly writer.

Let me lay it on the line: At nearly 28 years old, I’ve never been in a proper relationship. Even further — I’ve never actually been on a date with anyone I felt a real flare of passion for.

McCain’s comments:

OK, here’s your first big clue: Tognotti’s complaint is not that he gets zero action, but rather that he can’t get any action from girls he actually finds attractive.

His problem, therefore, is that he imagines himself entitled to be with good-looking women, rather than being forced to make do with the ordinary-looking women who are actually interested in him.

Women Hating Sites / Men’s Rights Sites Such as Moronic “Save The Males”

Women Hating Sites / Men’s Rights Sites Such as Moronic “Save The Males”

In a previous post, a reader asked me to check out and comment on the site “Save the Males.”

Here is in part how she described that site and some of the views on the site:

[Writers on the Save the Males site are] …. always talking down to women about how their position is at home with a husband and baby and specially the last article telling women to snatch a husband while in college.

This women is pushing the one sided idea that if a women wants to get married all she needs to do is snap her fingers and the guy will instantly agree to tie the knot, when the truth is far from this.

I will say it again most college guys will laugh at your face say if are thinking about marriage. They are focused on their career and or partying and see women as casual hooks or someone to avoid.

Here was my response to the reader that I was going to leave as a reply but decided to put into a post of its own:

Nothing has changed. I was a college student in the 1990s, and it was the same in the 1990s as it is now with the 20 something males.

By the way, you are not going to be in your 20s forever. You will turn 30, then eventually 40, and you will grow to deeply resent how the culture and churches fawn all over 20 somethings and cater to their every concern while ignoring yours.

If you are a single woman past age 35, you rarely will get any articles, editorials, or advice about being single.

Most preachers (and many secular authors) tailor all their singleness sermons, blogs, and books, and articles to a 20 something audience. People are very ageist in this regard.

If you think being single is bad now, just wait until you reach age 35, 40, and older and are still single – it gets 100 times worse, in several regards. (In some ways, it gets a little better, but that is another topic for another time.)

Also, it’s not just men in their 20s who are like what you were describing in your comments.

A lot of older men, men ages 30, 40, and up, are also reluctant to marry.