Male Author Slams Woman Author’s Editorial Slamming Working Mothers as Being Insulting Against Women AND Men

Male Author Slams Woman Author’s Editorial Slamming Working Mothers as Being Insulting Against Women AND Men

(Link): ‘Not only are you calling women selfish, you’re calling men incapable’: Father slams columnist who said motherhood is ‘under threat’ because women are prioritising their careers

Controversial columnist Miranda Devine made headlines in early February after writing a piece about working mothers.

In her column, titled ‘Don’t let your career make you a bad mother,’ Ms Devine said ‘motherhood is under threat’ and that ‘young women are coerced into prioritising careers and becoming feminist warriors against the so-called pay gap.’

Since, the column has been slammed by a number of women and furious mothers, including radio host Em Rusciano, who have labelled the piece both ‘offensive and ignorant.’

And now, Australian father-of-two and daddy blogger, Brad Kearns, has lashed out at the piece in defence of both himself and his wife.

‘Hey Miranda Devine, as a dad, I’ve never felt pressure to justify my career decisions to complete strangers,’ he  (Link): began.

‘Nobody has ever asked me how having children was going to impact my study or work. To be honest, I barely even entertained the thought that it could hold me back professionally.

‘Do you want to know why? Because I’m a f*****g man and society just assumes it wouldn’t change anything.’

Continue reading “Male Author Slams Woman Author’s Editorial Slamming Working Mothers as Being Insulting Against Women AND Men”

Children Don’t Come Cheap: Cost of Raising One Hits $233,610 (2017 Findings)

Children Don’t Come Cheap: Cost of Raising One Hits $233,610

(Link):  Raising kids isn’t cheap — and the annual cost of a child is only going up by J. Dennin

Wondering if you can afford to have a kid? Here’s some sobering news.

Children born in 2015 will cost about $380 more per year to raise than kids born in 2014, according to the Department of Agriculture’s latest report on the cost of raising a child in the United States, released Monday.

Overall, families spend between $12,350 and $13,900 annually on their kids, at least when you’re talking married couples with two kids in the middle third of income bands, the report found.

Continue reading “Children Don’t Come Cheap: Cost of Raising One Hits $233,610 (2017 Findings)”

WHO: Single People Who Struggle to Find A Partner To Be Considered “Infertile”

WHO: Single People Who Struggle to Find A Partner To Be Considered “Infertile”

I’m taken aback by some of the cranky comments by people who disagree with this decision. Take for example this (source):

Josephine Quintavalle, from Comment on Reproductive Ethics added: “This absurd nonsense is not simply re-defining infertility but completely side-lining the biological process and significance of natural intercourse between a man and a woman.

Well, excuse the hell out of me, Ms. Quintavalle, but some of us find ourselves single by circumstance – we had hoped to be married in our 20s or 30s but just could not find the right guy. I cannot get pregnant now because I have no husband to have sex with to get pregnant, by, HELLO.

You’re saying women like me shouldn’t be able to get help we need or want in having a kid of our own, if that is what we want (I never cared if I had one myself or not, but some women really want one). There is just no sympathy from some people for the circumstances other people find themselves in in life. I didn’t plan on turning out single well into my 40s, lady.

I don’t think that adult singleness should be thought of in a derogatory fashion as a “disability” (God knows we get enough of that condescending attitude from churches as it is), but I don’t see anything wrong with it pertaining to allowing singles who want to have  kid.

I’m also seeing one or two commentators who assume that single adults are more “selfish” than married couples, which is untrue and is (Link): the reverse!

(Link):   People Who Can’t Find Sex Partners Should Be Classified as ‘Disabled,’ Says World Health Organization

(Link):  Being Single Is Now a Disability, According to the World Health Organization

By Rhett Jones

For the WHO’s Dr. David Adamson, one of the authors of the new standards, this move is about creating medical equality. He says, “(Link): The definition of infertility is now written in such a way that it includes the rights of all individuals to have a family, and that includes single men, single women, gay men, gay women.”

Continue reading “WHO: Single People Who Struggle to Find A Partner To Be Considered “Infertile””

62-Year-Old New Mom Encourages Older Women to have Babies

62-Year-Old New Mom Encourages Older Women to have Babies

I first saw this story tweeted by Drudge, and lord-a-mercy, the folks leaving Tweets under it are judgmental little jerk-weeds.

Why do people care if women like this want to have a kid over the age of 50?

I find it hypocritical, too. Society puts all this pressure on women to have kids, and so, if a woman does have a kid, they pick apart when she has a kid, how many she has, does she use birth control or not to space them out, and on and on it goes.

Shut the hell up culture! Stop nit-picking apart women’s choices on when, if, how, or where they have a kid.

(Link): 62-year-old new mom encourages older women to have babies

Excerpts:

A 62-year-old woman from Spain has become a new mom.  Lina Alvarez of Lugo, in northwest Spain gave birth to a girl she named Lina.  She says “it’s impossible to be happier” at having her baby late in life.

Baby Lina was born on October 10th.  She was born a month early due to mom’s blood pressure problems and weighed 5 pounds and 2 ounces.  Lina is Alvarez’s third child.  Her oldest child is 27-years-old and she also has a 10-year-old.

Continue reading “62-Year-Old New Mom Encourages Older Women to have Babies”

Sexism, Protecting Women, Family Values, and Christians Placing Biological Family Above Everyone Else

Sexism, Protecting Women, Family Values, and Christians Placing Biological Family Above Everyone Else

(Link):  The Problem with Protecting our Wives and Daughters

Excerpts:

by K. Du Mez

….I’m reminded here of the poignant words of Madeline Southard, one of the leading proponents of women’s rights in the Methodist church in the twentieth century. In her 1927 book, The Attitude of Jesus toward Woman, Southard raised precisely this question.

For centuries, Southard noted, women had been considered “the creature of her sex-relationships and of the resultant blood relationships.” As such, a woman’s status had been determined by her being “the wife, mother, daughter, concubine or mistress of some man,” but not as “a person in herself.”

Continue reading “Sexism, Protecting Women, Family Values, and Christians Placing Biological Family Above Everyone Else”

Police Charge 45 Year Old Woman With Incest With 25 Year Old Son

Police Charge 45 Year Old Woman With Incest With 25 Year Old Son

These incest stories seem to be becoming more common lately.

Anyway, this goes to show that the Christian assumption that being a parent makes a person more godly or mature is a bunch of crap.

Puke
Puke

(Link): Police Charge 45 Year Old Woman With Incest With 25 Year Old Son

Police in Asheville, North Carolina, arrested a 45-year-old woman and charged her with having an illegal sexual relationship with her own 25-year-old son, reports

Melissa Nell Kitchens was accused of having a sexual relationship with her son, Shaun Thomas Pfeiffer, Buncombe County police said, according to (Link): the New York Daily News.

Continue reading “Police Charge 45 Year Old Woman With Incest With 25 Year Old Son”

Mother and Daughter Arrested for Alleged Incestuous Marriage, Woman Previously Married Son

Mother and Daughter Arrested for Alleged Incestuous Marriage, Woman Previously Married Son

Many Christians (especially the conservative ones who are totally consumed by culture wars and marriage idolatry) like to insist it is necessary for a person to marry and have children, because supposedly, being married and a parent bestows character, godliness, and responsibility to a person.

Clearly, this is not the case, when we see news stories like this one, of a biological mother involved in an incestuous relationship with her daughter.

(Link):   Oklahoma Mother Charged with Incest Allegedly ‘Looked Into’ Laws Before Marrying Daughter

(Link): Incest charges for Oklahoma mother and biological daughter

(Link):  Oklahoma woman and daughter arrested for incestuous marriage 

Puke
Puke

(Link):  Mother who married daughter faces jail for incest… 8 years after she married her son

Patricia Spann, 43, married 25-year-old Misty Spann in March 2016 in Comanche County. Six years previously, she had annulled her previous marriage – to her son Jody.

In August this year, Patricia and Misty’s relationship was discovered by the Department of Human Services during a child welfare investigation. Under state law, the marriage of close relatives is considered incestuous whether or not they also have a sexual relationship.

Continue reading “Mother and Daughter Arrested for Alleged Incestuous Marriage, Woman Previously Married Son”

Schoolgirl Drugged and Raped on Her 10th Birthday Was Chopped Up and Burned in Bathtub ‘by Own Family’

Schoolgirl Drugged and Raped on Her 10th Birthday Was Chopped Up and Burned in Bathtub ‘by Own Family’ 

This post contains vulgar language by me. Because I am incensed at what happened to this little girl, and how Christians tend to teach about or react to stories such as this.

-October 2016 update much farther below-


Terrible story. I feel so bad for this little girl.

The only consoling thing I can possibly think of is that she was probably so doped up (the mother’s boyfriend injected her with drugs or something before attacking her) that she at least was maybe un-aware of what was happening to her and could not feel any physical or psychological pain (I hope).

The articles say the girl’s mother just sat there and watched passively as her boyfriend doped up, raped, and killed her biological daughter (the man’s cousin, some woman named Jessica Kelley, also assaulted and attacked the girl).

SIDE RANT. Note to my fellow Pro-Lifers in the Abortion Debate:

I have read other news stories that talk about mama cats walking in and out of burning buildings to take their baby kittens out of the raging fire, one at a time, saving them all, and putting their own lives at risk in the process.

You see, there are some ANIMALS who are BETTER PARENTS to their offspring than some HUMANS.

So please, let’s lay off the whiny nonsense about how, “Oh, geepers, the media pay more attention to Cecil the Lion being killed by the dentist than abortions in Planned Parenthood, that’s not right” type stuff.

I’ve read two or three news reports about this so far.

This first one I’m linking to on here says that the girl’s mother met her boyfriend (the guy who killed the girl,) online.  I’m not sure if that means they met on a dating site or where exactly.

Many Christians like to say that being married and/or a parent are necessary to make a person more mature, godly, or responsible or loving. News stories like this show that to be absolute bunk. Parenthood and marriage are not magical panaceas that just cause people to be more ethical and loving. Give me a break.

I have always supported the death penalty – and news items like this is a big reason why.

Continue reading “Schoolgirl Drugged and Raped on Her 10th Birthday Was Chopped Up and Burned in Bathtub ‘by Own Family’”

With Menopause Reversal, Women Could Be Forever Fertile

With Menopause Reversal, Women Could Be Forever Fertile

(Link): With Menopause Reversal, Women Could Be Forever Fertile

The hot flashes, night sweats, and vaginal dryness characteristic of menopause may no longer also signal the end of a woman’s fertility thanks to a blood treatment used to heal wounds.

Presenting their findings at the European Society of Human Reproduction and Embryology annual meeting in Helsinki, Finland, this month, researchers in Greece said they were able to reverse menopause in roughly 30 women, including one who entered menopause at 40 but five years later menstruated again, reports (Link): New Scientist.

Continue reading “With Menopause Reversal, Women Could Be Forever Fertile”

Why does society still view childless women like me with suspicion? by E. Day

Why does society still view childless women like me with suspicion?

(Link): Why does society still view childless women like me with suspicion? by E. Day

Excerpts:

  • Remarks like Leadsom’s go far beyond the usual cut-and-thrust of the political arena and reveal how (Link): childless women are still viewed with innate suspicion. This, in spite of the fact that women in their mid-40s are now almost twice as likely to be childless as their parents’ generation. One in five women born in 1969 is childless today, compared with one in nine women born in 1942.
  • But there remains a taboo, a retrograde belief that (Link): we are in some way unnatural for not fulfilling our biological destiny. How else to explain the fact that the first question many people ask when I meet them is whether I have children, followed by an uncomfortable pause when I say that I don’t. “But why?” I can see them thinking. “What’s wrong with her?”

Continue reading “Why does society still view childless women like me with suspicion? by E. Day”

Many Parents Will Say Kids Make Them Happier. They’re Probably Lying. by A. Swanson

Many Parents Will Say Kids Make Them Happier. They’re Probably Lying. by A. Swanson 

(Link): Many Parents Will Say Kids Make Them Happier. They’re Probably Lying. by A. Swanson 

Excerpts:

  • Ask the vast majority of American parents, and they will tell you that having kids has made them happier.
  • The problem with this claim, as common as it is, is that (Link): research suggests it just isn’t true. People who have kids in the United States and in many countries around the world report being less happy than people who don’t have kids. Being a parent gives people a sense of purpose and meaning, as well as lifelong social connections. But for some reason, it doesn’t appear to bring American parents more happiness.
  • Now, new research has shed light on why this might be.
  • …The key to their findings is that not every country experiences a “parenting happiness gap” like the United States does. On average, an American parent reports being 12 percent unhappier than a non-parent in America – the biggest gap in the 22 countries the researchers looked at, followed distantly by Ireland. In 12 other countries, non-parents also described themselves as happier than parents.
  • ..The researchers examined the differences among these countries to figure out what might be causing the happiness gap. They conclude that U.S. policies – or, more accurately, the lack of them – are likely to be the fundamental cause, by increasing the cost and the amount of stress and anxiety that parents feel.

Related Posts:

(Link):  ‘It’s a break from the kids’: Why parents cheat more than childless couples

(Link):  Mommy Blogger Confesses in Blog Post that Mommy Blogging is a Bunch of Fake, Happy-Clappy B.S. – Kind of Like Most Christian Adult Singleness Blogs

(Link): Marriage Does Not Make People More Loving Mature Godly Ethical Caring or Responsible (One Stop Thread)

(Link):  Are Marriage and Family A Woman’s Highest Calling? by Marcia Wolf – and other links that address the Christian fallacy that a woman’s most godly or only proper role is as wife and mother

 

Dad Buys Full-Page $900 Newspaper Ad Seeking a Wife for His 48 Year Old, Never Married Son

Dad Buys Full-Page $900 Newspaper Ad Seeking a Wife for His 48 Year Old, Never Married Son

I hope this father realizes that men over 40 who father kids are more likely to father a kid with various diseases, see link 1, link 2, link 3.

(Link): Dad places newspaper ad to find wife for son

(Link):  Dad seeks ‘wife’ for 48-year-old son with full-page newspaper ad

(Link):  Wife wanted: Dad places spouse-needed ad in Idaho newspaper

  • The ad gives a brief description of Brooks, including a photo with the disclaimer, “I look just like my picture, except I now have grey hair.” The “About You” section states applicants “Will be attractive being height and weight proportional.” It also goes on to say that applicants should be prepared to have children with Brooks and also be a stay-at- home mom.

(Link):  MEDDLING BEVERLY HILLS DAD PUTS OUT FULL-PAGE AD TO FIND 48-YEAR-OLD SON A WIFE

  • He said his father has been ill and wants a grandson to carry on the family name.Brooks compared his father to Larry David’s character in the TV series “Curb Your Enthusiasm,” saying he “thinks he does the right thing, and then it all blows up in his face.”

    He said he’d never buy an ad like this himself, but “it’s worth a shot. Can’t hurt.”

(Link):  Full-page newspaper ad seeking wife

(Link): Dad Buys Full-Page $900 Newspaper Ad Seeking a Wife for His 48 Year Old, Never Married Son

  • One father in Beverly Hills is trying to find his son a wife the old-fashioned way.
  • Arthur Brooks, 78, spent $900 on a full-page ad in Idaho’s Coeur d’Alene Press newspaper using the headline “Looking For a Wife.”

Continue reading “Dad Buys Full-Page $900 Newspaper Ad Seeking a Wife for His 48 Year Old, Never Married Son”

Mommy Blogger Confesses in Blog Post that Mommy Blogging is a Bunch of Fake, Happy-Clappy B.S. – Kind of Like Most Christian Adult Singleness Blogs

Mommy Blogger Confesses in Blog Post that Mommy Blogging is a Bunch of Fake, Happy-Clappy B.S. – Kind of Like Most Christian Adult Singleness Blogs

I first got wind of this story via SCCL Facebook group ((Link): Conversation about this topic at SCCL FB Group).

A link to a news article about the Mommy Blogger is much farther below. I wanted to say a few things before getting to the article.

The (ex?) mommy blogger in question, Josi Denise, says in one of her blog posts that a lot of mommy blogging is fake and too happy-clappy.

Denise’s critique of Mommy Blogging is reminiscent of my views on blogs or magazine articles by Christians pertaining to adult singleness, which you can read here:

I find that a lot of Christian-written material for adult singles is too sickeningly sweet.

There is an absence in most Christian-penned material for singles that honestly, really gets into and grapples with, how hard, painful, or disappointing it can be to be single into your 30s and older, when you had really expected or had hoped to marry.

Continue reading “Mommy Blogger Confesses in Blog Post that Mommy Blogging is a Bunch of Fake, Happy-Clappy B.S. – Kind of Like Most Christian Adult Singleness Blogs”

Mothers Over 40 in Record Baby Boom: Number of Women Who Give Birth in Their Fifth Decade or Later Trebles

Mothers Over 40 in Record Baby Boom: Number of Women Who Give Birth in Their Fifth Decade or Later Trebles

This article is from 2010. I could have sworn I already did a blog post on this, but I looked around my blog a little bit and don’t see it.

(Link): Mothers over 40 in record baby boom: Number of women who give birth in their fifth decade or later trebles

  • By Steve Doughty for the Daily Mail
  • A baby boom among older women has trebled the number giving birth after their 40th birthday.
  • Almost 27,000 babies were born to mothers over 40 last year, figures revealed yesterday.
  • The unprecedented level is nearly three times the total of 20 years ago and up by 50 per cent over the past decade.
  • Even during the post-war childbirth peak in the Sixties there were fewer children born to women in their fifth decade and beyond.
  • Britain now has one of the highest birth rates for older women in the world, with 3.8 per cent of all babies born to mothers over 40. Only Italy has a higher level in Europe.

Continue reading “Mothers Over 40 in Record Baby Boom: Number of Women Who Give Birth in Their Fifth Decade or Later Trebles”

Woman in Her 70s May Be Oldest Ever to Give Birth

Woman in Her 70s May Be Oldest Ever to Give Birth

(Link): Woman in Her 70s May Be Oldest Ever to Give Birth

Excerpts:

  • By ARSHAD R. ZARGAR & ASHLEY WELCH CBS NEWS
  • May 12, 2016, 3:23 PM
  • A woman in India could make the record books as one of the oldest ever to give birth.
  • Daljinder Kaur, who’s believed to be at least 70 years old, gave birth to a son named Arman (meaning “wish” in Hindi) on April 19. The baby was the first for Kaur and her 79-year-old husband, Mohinder Singh Gill, after nearly five decades of marriage.
  • “I feel blessed to be able to hold my own baby. I had lost hope of becoming a mother ever,” said Kaur, who underwent two years of (Link): IVF treatment and had two failed attempts earlier.

Continue reading “Woman in Her 70s May Be Oldest Ever to Give Birth”

Salvation Army Bans Duggar / Quivering Cult’s ‘Retreat’ (Called ‘Get Them Married’) that Promoted Arranged Marriages for Teen Girls – Quivering Advocates Are Anti-Adult Singleness and Anti-Celibacy

Salvation Army Bans Duggar / Quivering Cult’s ‘Retreat’ (Called ‘Get Them Married’) that Promoted Arranged Marriages for Teen Girls – Quivering Advocates Are Anti-Adult Singleness and Anti-Celibacy 

Before I present you with the links to the news reports about this story (which are much farther down the page), I wanted to make some introductory comments in general, and a few specific comments refuting a few points from a pro-Quivering page about celibacy.

In regards to the specific news story I am blogging about today, this Quivering group is completely overlooking Apostle Paul’s comments in (Link): 1 Corinthians 7 that it is better for people to remain single than it is to marry – and Paul does not say that this teaching is in regards only to “a few,” or only a “minority” of people.

The Bible nowhere states that marriage is “a norm,” or that God expects or wants all, or most, people to marry.

It just so happens that in other cultures thousands of years ago, most people did happen to marry – one should not deduce from this cultural situation that God supported it or wanted it to be so. It just was what it was.

If the Bible said that all or most ancient Jews painted their bodies green once a year and balanced weasels on their heads while jumping up and down on a watermelon one week out of a year, one should not assume from this that

  • 1. God created that cultural practice and/or that
  • 2. God wanted Americans in the year 2016 to practice these things as well.

The Quivering group’s position on marriage, celibacy, and singleness is unbiblical, not to mention disturbing.

According to this article (linked to much farther below), the Quivering group was going to call this event, (where they set up marriages for little girls to marry), “Get Them Married.”

Why not have an event called, per 1 Corinthians 7, “It Is Better To Stay Unmarried”?

Am I opposed to marriage? No.

Is the God of the Bible against marriage? No.

But the Bible does not say that being married is better or more holy for girls, women, or culture, than being single, but a lot of Christian groups, and these wacky Christian cults, insist otherwise.

Christians need to do a better job of recognizing adult singleness and celibacy as legitimate, godly, biblical lifestyles and choices for all persons (and not only meant for a small minority of people who were supposedly “gifted” with it), instead of promoting marriage and natalism as the only legitimate avenues or as ways of fixing culture, the nation, or as pleasing God.

Continue reading “Salvation Army Bans Duggar / Quivering Cult’s ‘Retreat’ (Called ‘Get Them Married’) that Promoted Arranged Marriages for Teen Girls – Quivering Advocates Are Anti-Adult Singleness and Anti-Celibacy”

Woman, 47, Gives Birth to Her First Child an Hour After Learning She Was Pregnant

Woman, 47, Gives Birth to Her First Child an Hour After Learning She Was Pregnant

(Link):  A 47-year-old woman discovered she was pregnant an hour before giving birth

  • When severe abdominal pain sent 47 year-old Judy Brown to the hospital Wednesday night, she was shocked at her diagnosis: She was in labor.
  • A doctor at Beverly Hospital told Brown she was pregnant at about 6:20 p.m. An hour later, daughter Carolyn Rose was born, according to The Salem News .
  • “I was in a little shock,” Brown, a first-time mom, told The Salem NewsThursday.

  • According to WCVB, Judy and husband Jason have been married for 22 years, and the couple’s approach to having kids was always, “If it happens, it happens.”

  • The healthy baby weighed 8 pounds, 2 ounces and measured 20.5 inches long.

Continue reading “Woman, 47, Gives Birth to Her First Child an Hour After Learning She Was Pregnant”

Cops: Mom Allegedly Made, Sold Sexually-Charged Breastfeeding Videos

Cops: Mom Allegedly Made, Sold Sexually-Charged Breastfeeding Videos

Another notch in the bedpost of arguments against the Southern Baptist, Reformed, evangelical Protestant, Fundamentalist, and what seems to be the Roman Catholic propaganda that being a mother makes a woman more godly, loving, and mature…

Notice also that it was a married man who was buying and viewing these videos. Christians like to argue that single adults are horny horn dogs who are sexual deviants, and that married people are more godly and sexually ethical than singles – but I am forever seeing news stories about married people who are caught engaging in sexually perverse acts, like in this story.

Also, married sex is not as fulfilling as Christians claim it is, if married men keep going outside their marriages to get extra nooky from other people.

(Link): Cops: Mom Allegedly Made, Sold Sexually-Charged Breastfeeding Videos

  • by Chris Harris
  • Police in Florida have arrested a 31-year-old single mother accused of selling sexually explicit breast-feeding videos that allegedly featured her 18-month-old son.
  • Charges filed against Leigh Felten – a piano teacher from Tallahassee – during her arrest on on Friday include cruelty toward a child, promoting sexual performance by a child, lewd and lascivious behavior and molestation, according to a probable cause affidavit obtained by PEOPLE.
  • The document claims police in Wisconsin had reached out to their counterparts in Tallahassee on Oct. 6, after receiving a complaint from a woman who said her husband had allegedly bought and downloaded seven videos from a woman via YouTube.
  • The woman called police because the videos – purchased using PayPal – showed a woman breast-feeding a toddler “as both of them were nude.”
  • The affidavit says the videos depict “the female…rubbing oil on herself and the child. At one point, the female’s vagina and the child’s penis appear to be in contact with one another.”
  • The Wisconsin woman also told police she believed her husband travelled to Florida “to meet with the suspect, where he engaged in sexual intercourse with her.”
  • According to the affidavit, one video police inspected featured Felten “as she rubs her breasts back and forth across the child’s face.”
  • Felten remains in police custody on $60,000 bond. Court records did not indicate whether she has a lawyer at this time and it’s unclear whether she’s entered a plea.

Men Who Have Children Younger Die By Mid-Life -early marriage also involved, says researchers

Men Who Have Children Younger Die By Mid-Life -early marriage also involved, says researchers

So much for the evangelical, Reformed, and Southern Baptist method of guilt tripping and shaming people into early marriage – and parenthood.

They’ve been having fits about the fact that Christians are either not marrying at all (or not having children at all), or are not marrying or having children until later in life, so they’ve been screaming at Christians to marry before they are 25 and to start cranking out kids really young.

Check this out:

(Link):   How the Age You Become a Father Predicts Mortality

  • August 4, 2015
  • By Patricia Reaney
  • NEW YORK, Aug 4 (Reuters) – First-time dads in their early 20s may have the energy and agility to keep up with their young children, but a new study shows early fatherhood can pose perils later in life.
  • Research by Finnish researchers showed that becoming a father before the age of 25 is linked to a higher chance of dying in middle age.“Men who have a child before the age of 22 have a very clear higher midlife mortality than men who have children later, at an average age of 25 to 26,” said Dr. Elina Einio of the University of Helsinki.

Continue reading “Men Who Have Children Younger Die By Mid-Life -early marriage also involved, says researchers”

Fatherhood and Marriage Bring Out the Best In Men says Conservative Think Tank

Fatherhood and Marriage Bring Out the Best In Men says Conservative Think Tank

I am a social conservative and a right winger who doesn’t have a problem with marriage, the family unit, or natalism per se, but I do object to how other conservatives place such a tremendous premium on such things to the degree that they marginalize singles, celibacy, childlessness, and the childfree.

I also completely object to the notion put forward by Christians and conservatives that parenthood and marriage are necessary components to make persons mature, responsible, or ethical.

The Bible certainly does not teach that marriage or parenthood are necessary to accomplish those traits, but rather, says that the indwelling Holy Spirit, self control, choice, and self discipline are crucial in that regard.

I was scrolling through my Twitter feed today when I saw this tweet by conservative think tank Heritage Foundation:

<blockquote class=”twitter-tweet” lang=”en”><p lang=”en” dir=”ltr”>Fatherhood and <a href=”https://twitter.com/hashtag/marriage?src=hash”>#marriage</a&gt; bring out the best in men <a href=”http://t.co/RXqPfqhVa8″>http://t.co/RXqPfqhVa8</a&gt; <a href=”http://t.co/chYGErsuJx”>pic.twitter.com/chYGErsuJx</a></p>&mdash; Heritage Foundation (@Heritage) <a href=”https://twitter.com/Heritage/status/615641144962125824″>June 29, 2015</a></blockquote>
<script async src=”//platform.twitter.com/widgets.js” charset=”utf-8″></script>

Heritage quote (from their Tweet):

I left them (Link): this comment:

  • So does single celibacy [bring out the best in men]. Jesus Christ was a never married, celibate / childless man. Paul commends singleness in 1 Corinthians 7

The link in their tweet is to this page:

(Link): Fatherhood and Marriage Bring Out the Best in Men

Excerpts:

  • by Vanessa Calder
  • Is fatherhood becoming a relic of the past?
  • The sad absence of fathers in American families is pervasive and has been growing for decades. In the 1960s, less than 10 percent of American children were born to single women, but as of 2013, the number had increased to 41 percent. Among Hispanic children, 54 percent are born to unwed mothers, and the figure is 72 percent for African-American children.
  • The institution of fatherhood is not merely a passé throwback to the mid-20th century. Active and engaged fatherhood is an integral part of nature’s design. As Rutgers University’s David Popenoe states, “The contribution of fathers to child-rearing is unique and irreplaceable.”
  • Research shows the absence of fathers in the home is associated with poorer outcomes for children.

I can’t be bothered to reproduce the entire editorial here; you can click on the link provided to read the rest if you like. I assume it’s probably filled with a bazillion stats presumably saying how much healthier and happier kids are if brought up with a father who is around – such editorials are so common, filled with the same points I tire of reading them in full.

I’m not opposed to the nuclear family, but I don’t think fellow conservatives don’t realize how incorrect and ostracizing headlines such as “Fatherhood and Marriage Bring Out the Best in Men” comes across to men who never marry, men who are infertile, or whose wives are infertile, men who would love to marry but who cannot find a wife, men who have no interest in marrying or who don’t want children.

The Bible does not teach anywhere that marriage or parenthood are necessary to bring out a person’s best. 

Jesus and Paul advocated and commended adult singleness, celibacy, and childlessness.

The Bible teaches that God can “bring the best out of” anyone, regardless of their martial status or ability or lack thereof to procreate.

While I often disagree with liberals, I do agree with the liberal author of the following – I don’t know of many people who are ‘anti father.’

It is simply not true that fatherhood or marriage “bring out the best” in men. It was an encounter with the risen Lord and repentance that “brought the best” out of the apostle Paul.

If marriage and parenting are necessary to bring the best out of people or build character, that would mean anyone who does not marry or have children – even women such as myself who want to marry but never found the right guy – are doomed; we have no hope.

We can never improve our lot. And what of people who do marry, but their spouse dies? Or they have to divorce, because their spouse was abusive? Are they without hope as well, incapable of being their best? No, of course not.

So, if my fellow conservatives want to keep writing editorials supporting parenting and marriage, they need to drop the strawmen arguments, the stereotypes, and unbiblical talking points and find some other grounds from which to launch their points.

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Related posts:

(Link): Parenthood Does Not Make People More Loving Mature Godly Ethical Caring or Responsible (One Stop Thread)

(Link):  The Holy Spirit Sanctifies a Person Not A Spouse – Weekly Christian Marriage Advice Column Pokes Holes in Christian Stereotype that Marriage Automatically Sanctifies People

(Link): How Christians Have Failed on Teaching Maturity and Morality Vis A Vis Marriage / Parenthood – Used as Markers of Maturity Or Assumed to be Sanctifiers

(Link): Fatherhood Not Quite the Producer of Manly, Mature, Godly Men Some Conservative Christians Make It Out To Be

(Link): Salvation By Marriage Alone – The Over Emphasis Upon Marriage by Conservative Christians Evangelicals Southern Baptists

(Link):  “Who is my mother and who are my brothers?” – one of the most excellent Christian rebuttals I have seen against the Christian idolatry of marriage and natalism, and in support of adult singleness and celibacy – from CBE’s site

(Link):   American Churches Idolizing Fatherhood: Churches Want Your Dad, and Will Give Him Bacon, Guns, and a Grill

(Link): The Irrelevancy To Single or Childless or Childfree Christian Women of Biblical Gender Complementarian Roles / Biblical Womanhood Teachings

(Link):  Church must avoid becoming Fight Club to attract men by H. Coffey

(Link): New father killed his five-week-old son by slamming his face into cot because he felt fatherhood meant ‘his life was over’

(Link): Un-Happy Father’s Day!

(Link): Why men are boycotting marriage, fatherhood and the American Dream (article by Matt K. Lewis)

(Link): Are Marriage and Family A Woman’s Highest Calling? by Marcia Wolf – and other links that address the Christian fallacy that a woman’s most godly or only proper role is as wife and mother

(Link): Father Leaves 2 Month Old Son Alone in Car So He Can Go Shopping on Black Friday

(Link): There Are No “Biblical Men” by B. Robertson

(Link): Why Men Don’t Go To Church

(Link): New father killed his five-week-old son by slamming his face into cot because he felt fatherhood meant ‘his life was over’

(Link): Why all the articles about being Child Free? On Being Childfree or Childless – as a Conservative / Right Wing / Christian

(Link): Do You Rate Your Family Too High? (Christians Who Idolize the Family) (article)

(Link): The Isolating Power of Family-Centered Language (How churches exclude singles and the childless) by E A Dause

(Link): If the Family is Central Christ is Not

(Link):  AZ GOP vice-chair calls for sterilizing poor women: If you want a baby, get a job

(Link):  Baby Making Fixation at Christianity Today Magazine Online – Shaming Women For Not Procreating, or For Delaying Motherhood, or For Limiting the Number of Children

(Link):  Marriage, Parenthood, Judgment by Christians and Non Christians – You Can’t Win No Matter What Choice You Make