Lundy Bancroft: How to Spot Red Flags When Dating

Lundy Bancroft: How to Spot Red Flags When Dating

(Link): video on You Tube: Lundy Bancroft: How to Spot Red Flags When Dating

Also embedded here:

(Link): Warning Signs Of A Controlling And Abusive Man, According To A Domestic Violence Specialist

Excerpts:

by Gwen Farrell

….All of His Exes Are “Crazy”

…Maybe all of his exes really were “crazy,” but more often than not, this claim points to the fact that this guy doesn’t like taking any blame for any misdeeds or wrongdoing, and if he didn’t own up or take responsibility for his actions in his past relationships, chances are slim he’ll suddenly decide to do so with you.

He’s Disrespectful to You

If he’s verbally disrespectful, careless with the way he talks to you and about you to others, get the heck out. Psychologist Lundy Bancroft says, “Disrespect is the soil in which abuse grows.

Continue reading “Lundy Bancroft: How to Spot Red Flags When Dating”

Surprise! Slate’s Advice Column is Full of Fake Letters

Surprise! Slate’s Advice Column is Full of Fake Letters

(Link): Surprise! Slate’s Advice Column is Full of Fake Letters

by J. Sexton

Slate has an advice column called “Dear Prudence” which has been written by a number of people over the years.

The usual letter is some semi-plausible domestic situation which is always anonymous of course since no one would want their real name associated with these problems in public.

But it turns out that kind of anonymity and the desire for a certain brand of unbelievable, yet morally fashionable, dilemma created another problem.

It left the column open to fakes.

Continue reading “Surprise! Slate’s Advice Column is Full of Fake Letters”

Trans Activists and Leftists Are Now Also Harassing “Cis” (Biological) Men Who Are Homosexual, in Addition to Harassing Biological Hetero or Lesbian Women

Trans Activists and Leftists Are Now Also Harassing “Cis” (Biological) Men Who Are Homosexual, in Addition to Harassing Biological Hetero or Lesbian Women

For the past few years, transactivists have largely been aiming their harassment, sexism, and death threats at (biological) women (sometimes hetero women, but especially lesbian women) but in the last year or so, they seem to be shifting to harassing “cis” (biological) homosexual men as well.

The actual enemy of Lesbians and Homosexuals (especially in the United States, but this can apply in other nations) are not right wingers, Christians, or conservatives, but would be the far left Transactivists and people who use the “Queer” label.

(Note to any conservatives or straight people reading this who can’t or don’t keep up with the identity movements and jargon of the left:

While many heterosexuals have used the word “Queer” interchangeably to mean the same thing as “Homosexual,” that’s really not how the word is used now, due to what is called “Queer Studies” or “Queer Theory.”

But that is perhaps another topic for another post. (You can read an overview, if you wish, (Link): here on Wikipedia about the term)

Just bear in mind that the “Queer” in the “LGBTQ” acronym and group is non-supportive of the Lesbians, Gays, Bisexuals who don’t agree with their views on sexuality and identity – and the “Queers” are also not completely hospitable to the Trans persons, either.)

I’d like to start a blog post collecting such examples.

As time marches on, if  I come across more examples, I would like to edit this post to add them.

EXAMPLES OF THE FAR LEFT HARASSING HOMOSEXUAL MEN & RELATED ISSUES

(I have other posts listing examples of the far left harassing – or shaming, pressuring, or guilt tripping- biological hetero and homosexual women; here I am trying to keep the list limited to biological men who are homosexual.)

(Link): Boston Pride announces it will shut down after criticism it was racist, insufficiently supportive of BLM by John Sexton

Excerpts:

Boston Pride is the organization that has organized the largest annual pride parade in New England.
Today the group announced that it was shutting down all operations in response to demands from activists who accused the group of being racist and exclusive. Here’s a portion of the group’s statement (Link) about the decision

…The Boston Globe reports on the conflict that led to the group’s decision (Link): to dissolve itself

…Once the volunteers resigned, they set up a rival pride group and called for a boycott of Boston Pride. Former volunteers claimed it wasn’t just the altered statement but said the group had other problems including a history of micro and macroaggressions….

…So there you have it. A pretty significant pride organization has been canceled (or pushed into self-canceling) by complaints of racism and insufficient support for Black Lives Matter (and insufficient criticism of police).
People on the left who still think they’ll be spared the woke inquisition because they’re progressives in good standing should look on this and reconsider.
— end excerpts —

(Link): Golden – “To the Transphobic Cis White Gay Men at Pride” – this video was uploaded two years ago, so this bigotry has been going on longer than I realized (maybe, as of 2021, it is ramping up?):

This video was uploaded in March of 2020:

(Link): video on You Tube: Trans Activist Outed 100 Gay Men in Morocco

More links about that particular news story:

(Link): Transgender Moroccan Influencer Tells Women to Out Gay Men

A number of gay men have been rejected by their families, kicked to the streets, and some have committed suicide. Others are being violently threatened, harassed, and blackmailed.

Continue reading “Trans Activists and Leftists Are Now Also Harassing “Cis” (Biological) Men Who Are Homosexual, in Addition to Harassing Biological Hetero or Lesbian Women”

Parents Want To “Collect” Off Of Their Child’s Wedding – She Says No And Family Drama Ensues

Parents Want To “Collect” Off Of Their Child’s Wedding – She Says No And Family Drama Ensues

(Link): Parents Want To “Collect” Off Of Their Child’s Wedding – She Says No And Family Drama Ensues

Excerpts:

by Jonas Grinevičius and Austėja Akavickaitė

…A redditor shared how their parents were planning to use their wedding as a way to make bank.

See, they were planning to force their child to invite all of their distant relations and acquaintances so that everybody brings money as a gift.

That, in their parents’ opinion, is their way of getting back all the cash that they gave out at other people’s weddings, graduation parties, and other important events.

Naturally, the redditor confronted their parents when they realized that they have zero control over their own wedding.

Continue reading “Parents Want To “Collect” Off Of Their Child’s Wedding – She Says No And Family Drama Ensues”

The Art of Being Single by E. Bernstein

The Art of Being Single by E. Bernstein

(Link): The Art of Being Single

Excerpts:

March 2019

After Katie Tomaszewski divorced at the age of 28, she felt ashamed to be alone.

So she did what she thought a single person should do: She over-dated, over-worked and over-socialized, inviting friends over for dinner nearly every night because she was afraid of being lonely.

“It was constant socializing and constant distraction,” says Ms. Tomaszewski, now a 36-year-old Pilates instructor in Chicago. “I became desperate and depressed, looking for someone—anyone—to save me from being alone.”

Yes, it can be tough to be single. But a new study published this past December in the Journals of Gerontology offers hope for those who are struggling.

Singles today are more satisfied with their lives than singles in the past, the study found.

Continue reading “The Art of Being Single by E. Bernstein”

Emma Watson on Being “Self Partnered” (Single) – The Editorial Round Up

Emma Watson on Being “Self Partnered” (Single) – The Editorial Round Up

A week or two ago, movie actress Emma Watson declared herself “self partnered,” rather than use the word “single” to describe her relationship status.

Watson got some amount of confusion or ridicule for using that term. As a never-married woman, I found the term a little strange, but hey, if it works for her, fine by me.

I was engaged for several years, from my late 20s into my early 30s. My ex fiance was a self absorbed idiot. I am better off single than in a relationship with a loser like that. 

Anyway, there have been a few editorials defending Watson on this point, such as this one:

(Link): Emma Watson looked shame in the face and won

Excerpts

…”I never believed the whole ‘I’m happy single’ spiel,” she told Vogue in an interview published this week. “It took me a long time, but I’m very happy [being single]. I call it being self-partnered.”

Now anyone might be forgiven for being blindsided by the “consciously uncoupled”-esque vibe of that remark at first glance. Indeed, many outright jeered. “Self-partnering means you can’t get a bloke, right?” suggested British TV host and, we can only assume, self-appointed relationship expert Piers Morgan.

“What’s wrong with being single?” Twitter users demanded.

But isn’t that kind of the point? If society was kinder to single women, and our associations with the word “single” were generally more positive, there wouldn’t be any need for Watson to coin the phrase.

Continue reading “Emma Watson on Being “Self Partnered” (Single) – The Editorial Round Up”

‘I Hate Dating Apps So Much!’ By Heather Havrilesky

‘I Hate Dating Apps So Much!’ By Heather Havrilesky

(Link): ‘I Hate Dating Apps So Much!’ By Heather Havrilesky

Dear Polly,

I’m a huge fan, and I’m so grateful for your writing. There is one area, however, where I think you may have a blind spot, and that is the absolutely terrible plight of trying to find love on dating apps.

Your general advice about the pursuit of love always resonates:
Build a life alone that you love; hold onto your belief that love exists even when it makes you feel vulnerable and uncool; if you meet someone you think you like but they’re tepid or not fully invested, go ahead and tell them to fuck off.

I now read this and think, “Yep, got it, great advice, duly noted.”

My execution is sometimes imperfect, but I remain fully convinced that you are right about these things.

However, that belief doesn’t change the day-to-day, grueling nature of what “being open to love” in 2019 entails.

I am 35 years old, and I have been on and off dating websites or apps for almost a decade.

During that time, I’ve met a very small handful of people I ended up caring deeply for, or felt I could deeply care for, but for various reasons it has never worked out.

Continue reading “‘I Hate Dating Apps So Much!’ By Heather Havrilesky”

The Man Using Equations To Find Love

The Man Using Equations To Find Love

(Link): All you need is maths? The man using equations to find love

Mathematician Bobby Seagull has tried to use numbers to solve his romantic difficulties. Is he on to something?

by Ellie Hunt

They say love is a numbers game. Bobby Seagull – the mathematician who rose to fame as a finalist on University Challenge in 2017 – took them literally.

A few years ago, he sat down to try to work out why he had been so unlucky in life. “I was 32 or 33, I was single, I loved maths and science – I thought: ‘Can I use maths and science to help me?’ It was a genuine, earnest attempt.”

Inspired by Peter Backus – a Manchester University economics lecturer who in 2010 wrote a paper titled Why I Don’t Have a Girlfriend – Seagull used the Drake equation, developed to estimate how many intelligent alien civilisations there might be in the galaxy, to determine his number of potential partners. “You start by assuming there’s infinitely many, then you keep on making the pool smaller and smaller.”

….Numbers have long factored into the dating game, even for those who have a ropey grasp on them. We might wonder, of a couple’s particularly serendipitous origin story: “What are the chances?” Or we might console someone who is unhappily single that “it only takes one”.

Continue reading “The Man Using Equations To Find Love”

High Schoolers Who Don’t Date Are Less Depressed Than Their Counterparts Who Do (2019) Study Says

High Schoolers Who Don’t Date Are Less Depressed Than Their Counterparts Who Do (2019) Study Says

(Link): High Schoolers Who Don’t Date Are Less Depressed Than Their Counterparts Who Do Study Says

Kirsi Goldynia, CNN
Updated 2:45 PM ET, Wed September 11, 2019

(CNN)Dating is a normal part of adolescence — and a formative one at that. Decades of research have suggested a link between romantic relationships and identity development as teenagers mature into young adults.

But a recent study published in the Journal of School Health reveals that adolescents who choose not to date fare as well as, or better than, their coupled counterparts in social and leadership skills.

They’re also less depressed.

Continue reading “High Schoolers Who Don’t Date Are Less Depressed Than Their Counterparts Who Do (2019) Study Says”

Woman Shares Story Of How A Group of Women Helped Her Narrowly Avoid Being Kidnapped While On A Date

Woman Shares Story Of How A Group of Women Helped Her Narrowly Avoid Being Kidnapped While On A Date by Greg Evans

(Link): Woman Shares Story Of How A Group of Women Helped Her Narrowly Avoid Being Kidnapped While On A Date

Excerpts:

June 2019

Dating someone who is relatively unfamiliar can be a bit of a nightmare, especially if that person turns out to be not as decent as they make out.

This can be even more troublesome, should a man turn out to be not who he said he was when he started messaging.

Continue reading “Woman Shares Story Of How A Group of Women Helped Her Narrowly Avoid Being Kidnapped While On A Date”

A Philosopher of Sex Says Sexual Freedom Is Destroying Desire by Olivia Goldhill

A Philosopher of Sex Says Sexual Freedom Is Destroying Desire by Olivia Goldhill

(Link): A Philosopher of Sex Says Sexual Freedom Is Destroying Desire

Excerpts

Philosophers claim to explore the most fundamental features of existence, but have been disappointingly silent on one all-important subject: Sex.

Sure, Michel Foucault addressed the sociological discourses around sex and Simone de Beauvoir definitively demonstrated the value of sexual equality, but what about sex itself—or, as philosophy professor Jeanne Proust researches, sexual desire?

Continue reading “A Philosopher of Sex Says Sexual Freedom Is Destroying Desire by Olivia Goldhill”

Ask E. Jean: My Husband Will Not Shower

Ask E. Jean: My Husband Will Not Shower

So much for the conservative and Christian myth that marriage makes people more mature, godly, and responsible.

(Link): Ask E. Jean: My Husband Will Not Shower

How do I get the guy to be more into hygiene? I’ve tried everything!

Continue reading “Ask E. Jean: My Husband Will Not Shower”