Female TikTok Users Ditch Dating Apps, Go Husband-Hunting at Home Depot

Female TikTok Users Ditch Dating Apps, Go Husband-Hunting at Home Depot

Well this is bizarre.

I don’t know how men feel about being flirted with when they’re out on tasks like shopping, but most women hate this. Most women don’t want men staring at them or flirting with them if they’re shopping or at a gym.

Considering that churches have gender imbalances that favor single men, if you’re a single Christian woman, you may have more luck meeting a single guy at a Home Dept – God knows you won’t meet many eligible single men at any churches. The men who do attend churches are pedophiles or perverts or abusers.

(Link): Hilarious social media challenge has women ditching dating apps to find love at Home Depot

(Link):  Female TikTok users say they’re deleting their dating apps and heading to Home Depot

Jan. 23, 2023
by Ben Tobin

…Could Home Depot be the destination to meet your future husband? If some TikTokers are to be believed, the retailer’s over 2,000 locations have become an unlikely spot to look for dates.

Of the many women on TikTok who say they’re “deleting the dating apps in 2023,” some say they’re looking for love in a surprise location. “I’m headed to Home Depot to look confused in the lumber aisle.”

The humorous trend has been building for almost two years.

“Ladies, no joke, Home Depot is where you go if you want to meet a man,” TikTok user meganlouise217 said in a video in March 2021.

(Link): How doers get more done: Female TikTok users ditch dating apps, go husband-hunting at Home Depot

January 24, 2023

A recent fad has some young, single women on TikTok using their phones for more than just swiping right on dating apps like Bumble and Tinder. Instead, these girls are heading to home improvement stores like Home Depot to find a husband — and using the camera on their phone to chronicle their experiences.

Continue reading “Female TikTok Users Ditch Dating Apps, Go Husband-Hunting at Home Depot”

The One Question You Should Never Ask a Single Person at Christmas by J. Hocking

The One Question You Should Never Ask a Single Person at Christmas by J. Hocking

(Link): The one question you should never ask a single person at Christmas

Excerpts:

by Jana Hocking
December 15, 2022

This time of year can put a shiver up the spine of most singletons.

Yes, it’s Christmastime, and oopsy daisy, you forgot to bag yourself a partner in time for dinner with the family.

You’re armoring up for the “Why haven’t you got yourself a partner yet?” question from annoying relatives with good hearts, and the idea of waking up by yourself instead of to a boisterous house full of children and a sexy husband can seem pretty darn crappy.

Except … it’s not.

You see, we focus so much on the traditional side of Christmas, we forget that this time of year as a singleton is actually ridiculously fun.

Don’t believe me? Let me point out a few reasons why you can thank the Lord he didn’t throw your soulmate into your direct path this year.

1. Sweet, sweet freedom

Unlike partnered-up couples who are arguing about who will be designated driver, and trying to figure out whose family gets Christmas and whose gets Boxing Day, you get the glorious gift of freedom to pick and choose to do whatever the heck you want for Christmas.

Continue reading “The One Question You Should Never Ask a Single Person at Christmas by J. Hocking”

Dating Profiles that are More Original, Contain Metaphors and Personal Information Get More Attention

Dating Profiles that are More Original, Contain Metaphors and Personal Information Get More Attention

(Link): Dating profiles that are more original, contain metaphors and personal information get more attention

October 19, 2022

TILBURG, Netherlands — Dating profiles that contain metaphors and concrete personal information, rather than vague statements spark more attention, according to a new study.

Researchers in the Netherlands say apps such as Tinder, Hinge, and Bumble have made dating quicker and easier for singles across the globe. However, they tend to make people pickier, as the pool of potential dates has become endless.

The numerous options mean it is important to have a profile that stands out. According to the new research, the profiles that have more original text have the most success. That text could be anything from a small fact or a joke, to future life goals, or your favorite food.

Continue reading “Dating Profiles that are More Original, Contain Metaphors and Personal Information Get More Attention”

Woman Says Why She’s Rejecting These ‘Lonely, Single Men’ – also: Male Entitlement In and Out of the Church, Men Who Won’t Take Personal Responsibility for Their Singleness

Woman Says Why She’s Rejecting These ‘Lonely, Single Men’ – also: Male Entitlement In and Out of the Church, Men Who Won’t Take Personal Responsibility for Their Singleness

Below this article, I have a lot of comments, before I resume with providing another link related to this first one:

(Link): Woman says why she’s rejecting these ‘lonely, single men’

Aug 18, 2022
By Jana Hocking, News.com.au

Unless you were hiding under a rock this week, you would have read about an article published on Psychology Today titled “The Rise of Lonely, Single Men.”

It was written by psychologist, Greg Matos, and revealed that dating opportunities for heterosexual men are diminishing as relationship standards rise.

The psychologist explained that women are now only dating men who share the same values, have great communication skills and are emotionally available. Praise the lord!

Toxic men are out, respectful studs are in.

Now first of all, may we get out our violins and play a sad melody for the men who have treated women like absolute rubbish and then realized that they’re now single and alone. How unfair for these poor creatures.

You see, while they were bed-hopping, ghosting, breadcrumbing and doing all sort of mind f–kery to us women folk, we were quietly, and subtly embracing this ‘self love’ culture that started to emerge in TED Talks, TikTok videos, YouTube channels, and various other online forms.

Oprah preached: “If you feel like he is stringing you along, then he probably is. Don’t stay because you think ‘it will get better’. You’ll be mad at yourself a year later for staying when things are not better.”

Continue reading “Woman Says Why She’s Rejecting These ‘Lonely, Single Men’ – also: Male Entitlement In and Out of the Church, Men Who Won’t Take Personal Responsibility for Their Singleness”

“Immediately No”: Mental Health Expert Shares Red Flags on Dating Profiles

“Immediately No”: Mental Health Expert Shares Red Flags on Dating Profiles

I don’t agree with all of this person’s red flags, but some of them may be worthwhile to keep in mind.

 (Link): “Immediately no”: Mental health expert shares red flags on dating profiles

Excerpts:

by C. Ferris
June 2, 2022

In a now-viral TikTok video, a mental health expert discussed what would cause her to not match with someone on a dating app.

Karli Kucko, LPC-A shares content about mental health on her TikTok and Instagram accounts @karli.k.counseling. She recently posted a video on her TikTok where it garnered more than 100,000 views. The video, which discussed seeing people making demands on their profile, was the first of several that touched on behaviors that would cause her to “swipe left.”

Viewers found these points helpful, and many shared what they considered to be red flags when they peruse dating apps themselves.

Good Morning America outlined a few tips for a strong dating profile, which include users posting good quality photos, writing “just enough” about themselves and being up-front with their intentions.

Matthew Hussey, a New York Times bestselling author and dating expert, told the outlet that there is a way to be open and honest while remaining positive.

“If you’re going to say you want something serious, frame it in a positive way rather than a negative one,” he said. “You don’t want to come across as bitter or jaded.”

In Kucko’s first video, she said something that would make her “swipe left” is seeing someone making demands on their profile. She noted that statements like “have to have, can’t do, must do,” were some examples of phrases that led to her not matching with someone.

Continue reading ““Immediately No”: Mental Health Expert Shares Red Flags on Dating Profiles”

Men Who Pose Shirtless on Dating Apps are Unappealing and Slutty: Study


Men Who Pose Shirtless on Dating Apps are Unappealing and Slutty: Study

I appreciate that we’re living in an era where men are starting to be called or thought of as “slutty.” 😂  For years being a “whore” or a “slut” were terms reserved for women only.

The cultural assumption was that it was okay for men to sleep around as much as they want to, and they were considered studly, but if a woman slept around – not even that much – she would get branded as “slutty” or “loose.”

(Link):  Want to impress on your Tinder profile? Keep your top ON! Men who pose topless are seen as less competent and more promiscuous, study reveals

May 24, 2022

While dating apps were once seen as taboo, they’re now one of the main ways that singletons find love around the world.

But if you have a profile on a dating app, a new study may encourage you to reassess which pictures you include.

Researchers from the University of Colorado have revealed that men who pose topless on Tinder are seen as less competent and more promiscuous.

Continue reading “Men Who Pose Shirtless on Dating Apps are Unappealing and Slutty: Study”

I Appear Successful, But Since Having Kids I Feel I’ve Lost Myself by Annalisa Barbieri (Letter from a Married Mother Who Has Depression, Low Self Esteem)

I Appear Successful, But Since Having Kids I Feel I’ve Lost Myself by Annalisa Barbieri (Letter from a Married Mother Who Has Depression, Low Self Esteem)

Before I get to the link and the letter, I wanted to say…

The article below – via The Guardian – doesn’t make it clear, but the following appears to be an e-mail or a letter from a married mother who has low self esteem, and she’s writing to this paper for advice, guidance, and help.

I’m sorry this lady is not doing well, but I want you to take away from this that being married and being a mother (having children) will not necessarily make you happy, or bring you joy, inner peace, or a healthy sense of identity.

I’m afraid that a lot of conservatives – especially Christians – keep promoting these false notions to women, from the time we are girls, that if we just marry (and/or have children), that being married and a parent will bring us permanent happiness and purpose in life, but clearly, that is not the case.

I am not “anti family” nor “anti motherhood,” but I figured out a long time ago that being a parent or married may not bring you fulfillment in life, and it is that expectation that a lot of “pro family,” “pro motherhood” type of conservatives continue to hold up – it is misleading, false hope and propaganda.

I’ve got other examples on my blog of women who married (or who are mothers), and yet, being married (or being a mother) didn’t bring them happiness, but they were still left feeling overlooked, depressed, or lonely – in some cases, because the man they married doesn’t meet their emotional needs regularly, but spends all his day wrapped up in his hobbies or watching television.

I have blog posts of women who admit that they regret motherhood!

I think if you’re someone who had hoped or expected to marry (or have children) it can be painful  or very disappointing if that did not happen for you, but if you can accept it,
and permit yourself to go through a grieving process and determine to move on in life and determine to enjoy life anyway (in spite of life not turning out how you had hoped), that you can ultimately find joy, happiness, fun, and peace without a spouse and without children.

You can find other avenues of joy, meaning, and happiness in life that don’t involve being married or having children. I made that transition myself years ago, though it took me several years of grappling with unhappiness to get there, but it can be done.

But again, notice, that although the woman letter writer here married and had children, that she is STILL depressed, feels like a failure, feels like a “loser,” and thinks she is not enough.

Being a wife and a mother – contrary to what a lot of excessively pro-family, pro-natalism Christian conservatives bang on about – did not fill that empty void she has, nor increase her self image to a healthy level.

(Link): I appear successful, but since having kids I feel I’ve lost myself

Excerpts:

Squashing your anger down is exhausting. Try using your free time to do what makes you feel good, and see what shifts

May 20, 2022
by Annalisa Barbieri

[This appears to be a question from a writer to an advice columnist named Annalisa Barbieri? – the article doesn’t make it clear]:

[Dear Advice Columnist,]

I have struggled with depression and anxiety since my teens and have had therapy and medication on and off since I was 17 (I am now 37). I’m aware of deep-rooted low self-esteem and shame.

I feel worthless. I never want to draw attention to myself and have a paralysing fear of confrontation.

I have managed to maintain a few close friendships, have worked in the past, and am married with two kids. So I appear “successful” on the surface.

Continue reading “I Appear Successful, But Since Having Kids I Feel I’ve Lost Myself by Annalisa Barbieri (Letter from a Married Mother Who Has Depression, Low Self Esteem)”

Divorce Attorney Reveals SHOCKING Reasons That DESTROY Relationships And Cause Bad BREAKUPS – via ‘Women of Impact’

Divorce Attorney Reveals SHOCKING Reasons That DESTROY Relationships And Cause Bad BREAKUPS – via ‘Women of Impact’

I’m not even half way done with this video yet (linked to and embedded below in this post), but this lady in the video is giving some great insights and advice. (I’ve just finished listening to the entire video, and it is worth the entire watch.)

The lady in the video mentions she didn’t get married until around (or a bit after?) age 40.

The divorce attorney (who later became a judge, if I understand correctly) said up until that point, she did get a lot of questions from people asking her why she wasn’t married yet.

(I also had to put up with that, or with other nasty assumptions, from others, when I was still single into my 30s. I was raised in a conservative Christian church, and a lot of Christians wrongly assume if you’re a woman who has not married by the age of 30 or 35, it’s because you are a man-hating feminist or that that you were too “career focused.” It’s a very victim-blaming, sexist world view.)

Some of the points this lady, Faith Jenkins, addressed in the video includes but is not limited to (these are also points I’ve learned along the way with life experience, and just mulling things over):

  • You have to know who you are and figure out who you are before you get married.
  • It’s far more healthy to learn to be single before you get married.
  • Don’t wait to get married to start living and enjoying your life – she says, “being single is not a rest stop. [At the time I was single I concluded that] it’s time for me to really live.”
  • Don’t look to someone outside of yourself to make you happy.

(Note from me, the blog owner: this is a big one.
If you go through life making your sense of self worth, happiness, or opinion about yourself contingent upon external circumstances or on how others treat you, you will never, ever achieve stable, consistent, or lasting healthy self esteem or happiness
– and along the way, if you keep making your self worth contingent on how others treat you or their opinions of you, you will tend to attract selfish people, abusers, and very emotionally needy people who will want all your time and attention, leaving you drained
– I’ve learned the hard way that many of the people who will want to use you as a sounding board, a “rock” they lean on, will not return that courtesy to you – they won’t allow you to talk to them about your problems)

  • She says you should know who you are before you marry – I think this is also a good idea prior to dating.

If you know who you are prior to dating or marriage (you know your identity and your likes, your dislikes, and your values), you won’t change to please someone else (a lot of abusive or controlling people will either badger you, pressure you, threaten, or demand that you make changes to yourself or your life to please them), and it makes it easier to weed out incompatible or potentially abusive partners.

  • She discourages you from trying to clean up, fix, rescue another person, what she refers to as “rebuilding” another person.

I agree with her on that – you ultimately cannot change another person, and you will only exhaust yourself trying. I think a lot of women who do this are people pleasers or codependents, and it’s a huge waste of time.

Continue reading “Divorce Attorney Reveals SHOCKING Reasons That DESTROY Relationships And Cause Bad BREAKUPS – via ‘Women of Impact’”

Dear Abby: Lengthy Marriage Now Includes Threats and Ill Will

Dear Abby: Lengthy Marriage Now Includes Threats and Ill Will

I like seeing content like below.

It’s nice to see that decades-old Hollywood and Christian propaganda about marriage (or romantic relationships overall) “completing” a person or making him or her happy is a bunch of garbage.

This married guy sounds miserable. His wife doesn’t sound happy with him, either.

(Link): Dear Abby: Lengthy Marriage Now Includes Threats and Ill Will

Dear Abby,

I am a 50-year-old man, married for 25 years. My wife is older than I. In the beginning, it was great, but our relationship slowly started failing, and now we argue about everything.

I feel like I’m trapped in a cage.

We don’t have one single thing in common anymore.

Continue reading “Dear Abby: Lengthy Marriage Now Includes Threats and Ill Will”

How I Navigated the Minefield of Online Dating in Later Life – and How You Can Too by Alice Grebot

How I Navigated the Minefield of Online Dating in Later Life – and How You Can Too by Alice Grebot

(Link): How I Navigated the Minefield of Online Dating in Later Life – and How You Can Too by Alice Grebot

Excerpts:

Feb 27, 2022

D*ck pics, scammers and GHOSTERS… would you brave online dating?

It’s the most popular way to find love in 2022 – but as these three women discovered, online dating in later life is a minefield!

‘I had to Google what ghosting is’

…After a few months of being single, I began hankering for some adult company, and online dating felt like the easiest way to meet somebody. I’d met my ex at work and I had a little experience of it from years ago, but the idea of speed dating or singles’ clubs didn’t appeal, and no one seemed to go out ‘on the pull’ any more.

I downloaded Bumble, Hinge and Tinder, but soon deleted the latter, as it seemed to be full of men looking for something casual, while I wanted a relationship.

Continue reading “How I Navigated the Minefield of Online Dating in Later Life – and How You Can Too by Alice Grebot”

Secular Sex Ed Failures, Secular Sexual and Biological Ignorance

Secular Sex Ed Failures, Secular Sexual and Biological Ignorance

Are you counting on secular sources to educate you properly on sex, biology, anatomy, or puberty? Are you counting on secular sources to even address a possible (negative) psychological and emotional consequence of having sex when you’re not truly ready, or don’t want to do it, but feel shamed or guilted by a date or culture, into having sex? Ha ha, well, good luck with that!

Not only do some Non-Christians hold false or weird ideas about sex themselves, but some Non-Christians like to portray all or most Christians as having false, shaming, or weird ideas about sex.

As someone who has followed a lot of Non-Christian, feminist social media accounts or who has dropped by their magazine sites to read their articles about sex, men, and sexism in the last several years, one recurrent theme that shows up is how ignorant teen boys and men in their 20s (and sometimes older men) are about sex.

I should maybe do a post about that later.

But the fact is, a lot of Non-Christian men, who are being raised in secular culture, some of whom have who even been exposed to secular sex education teachings in public school, have NO IDEA how a woman’s body works.

A lot of these Non-Christian men hold all sorts of false, bonkers ideas of how  menstrual periods work, or how a woman can get pregnant, for example, which shocks the secular, feminist women writers.

There are secular, liberal feminists who mock this secular, male ignorance all the time on their sites.

You can probably google to find examples of it. Maybe I will make a post about it later. I’ve seen a lot of it over the years.

Sexual Abstinence is, in fact, one way to totally avoid contracting STIs, sorry to inform the critics of Christian sexual ethics, or the high school kids in some of the quotes below on the BuzzFeed site, who lament that their sex ed teachings advised them (accurately!) that sexual abstinence is the safest bet.

There is no form of artificial birth control that is 100% effective. Condoms are cited as being 98% effective, but what if you’re in on that two percent failure rate?

Some forms of sexual acts, such as anal sex (which (Link): some secular teen magazines have been promoting in the last few years), are more liable to cause or spread disease and create physical issues.
See, for example, this SECULAR (Non-Christian) page about anal sex at WebMD, which confirms that:

(Link):  Anal Sex Safety: What to Know

Excerpt:

The lining of the anus is thinner than the vagina, and it lacks natural lubrication. That makes it much more vulnerable to tearing. Tears can allow viruses and bacteria to enter the bloodstream. This can include sexually transmitted infections, such as HIV.

Studies have suggested that anal exposure to HIV poses 30 times more risk for the receptive partner than vaginal exposure.

Anal intercourse can also boost the risk of getting the human papillomavirus (HPV).

HPV may also lead to the development of anal warts and anal cancer. Using lubricants can help, but it doesn’t completely prevent tearing.

The tissue inside the anus is not as well-protected as the skin outside the anus. Our external tissue has layers of dead cells that serve as a protective barrier against infection. The tissue inside the anus doesn’t have this natural protection, which leaves it vulnerable to tearing and the spread of infection.

The anus was designed to hold in feces. The anus is surrounded with a ring-like muscle, called the anal sphincter, which tightens after we have a bowel movement. When the muscle is tight, anal penetration can be painful and difficult.

Repetitive anal sex may weaken the anal sphincter, making it difficult to hold in feces until you can get to the toilet. Kegel exercises to strengthen the sphincter may help prevent this problem or correct it.

The anus is full of bacteria. Bacteria normally in the anus can potentially infect the giving partner. Having vaginal sex after anal sex can also lead to vaginal and urinary tract infections.
— end excerpts —

I don’t think all the samples on the pages below are all Christian –
(I am not going to copy the entire pages; if you’d like to see all the examples, please use the links below to visit the pages to view them all if you want to):

(Link): One Man Believes Women With Large Boobs Scientifically Can’t Be Smart And 49 Other Jaw-dropping Misconceptions Men Actually Believe About Women (some of the examples on the page involve inaccurate ideas men have about female anatomy, biology, etc)

(Link):  34 Things Some Men Believe About The Female Body That Concern Me

I think it’s time for us to have an adult sex-ed class because WHEW, child.

…5. “I’m a female student who’s taking sex ed now.
The funniest thing to me is how often they refer to penises and male anatomy, but rarely discuss vaginas and female anatomy. It’s kinda disgusting how little the guys have to learn about vaginas and periods, yet, I know pretty much everything about males now.”

(Link):  People Are Sharing What’s Being Taught Today In Sex Ed And It Proves We Still Have A Long Way To Go

(Link):  “My Sex Ed Teacher Told Me Women Cannot Orgasm”: People Are Sharing The Biggest Sex Ed Failures They’ve Ever Witnessed

Excerpts:

“My male sex education teacher told our entire classroom that period cramps do not exist and that he would not accept them as an excuse to get out of gym class.”

January 8, 2022
by Maya Ogolini – BuzzFeed Staff

Let’s face it: Sex can sometimes be an uncomfortable conversation topic when you’re young. Whether your school had a teacher attempt to explain things in health class or your parents sat you down for a “birds and the bees” talk, chances are you spent a majority of the time learning about sex wishing that you were anywhere else.

But sometimes trying your best to avoid an awkward situation can actually result in a much more awkward, embarrassing situation.

Recently, Reddit user u/wilson-volleyball77 asked,

“What is one sex education fail you’ve heard/experienced?”

Here are some of the best:

1. “If you use a tampon before sex, then you’re no longer a virgin. The number of people that believe this is unbelievable.”
—u/Typical-Cantaloupe48

“When I was a freshman in high school, my dad heard me tell my mom that I needed tampons from the store, and he freaked out. He thought that you had to have sex first before being able to use them. I was only 14, and I understood all that a lot better than him.
—u/sunflowerssunshine_

…6. “A guy once told me he thought periods lasted a whole month.”
—u/AstroLozza

7. “I was asked this question, ‘How will you be able to pee when you have your hysterectomy?’
—u/purely_logic

“I had to tell my first girlfriend she didn’t pee out of her vagina. She didn’t know she had a urethra.”
—u/Sebastian83100

Continue reading “Secular Sex Ed Failures, Secular Sexual and Biological Ignorance”

New York Times: Respect Your Daughter’s Choice To Be A Married Man’s Mistress by T. Justice

New York Times: Respect Your Daughter’s Choice To Be A Married Man’s Mistress by T. Justice

(Link): New York Times: Respect Your Daughter’s Choice To Be A Married Man’s Mistress

January 18, 2022

Poetic Justice is an advice column that offers counter-advice to submissions at other publications whose contributors have failed the reader.

The New York Times last week admonished a woman who was uncomfortable about the prospect of allowing her daughter in a relationship with a married man to bring him on a Greek vacation.

[The letter reads]…

My 30-year-old daughter is in a polyamorous relationship with a married man.

Continue reading “New York Times: Respect Your Daughter’s Choice To Be A Married Man’s Mistress by T. Justice”