Woman in Her 70s May Be Oldest Ever to Give Birth

Woman in Her 70s May Be Oldest Ever to Give Birth

(Link): Woman in Her 70s May Be Oldest Ever to Give Birth

Excerpts:

  • By ARSHAD R. ZARGAR & ASHLEY WELCH CBS NEWS
  • May 12, 2016, 3:23 PM
  • A woman in India could make the record books as one of the oldest ever to give birth.
  • Daljinder Kaur, who’s believed to be at least 70 years old, gave birth to a son named Arman (meaning “wish” in Hindi) on April 19. The baby was the first for Kaur and her 79-year-old husband, Mohinder Singh Gill, after nearly five decades of marriage.
  • “I feel blessed to be able to hold my own baby. I had lost hope of becoming a mother ever,” said Kaur, who underwent two years of (Link): IVF treatment and had two failed attempts earlier.

Continue reading “Woman in Her 70s May Be Oldest Ever to Give Birth”

Salvation Army Bans Duggar / Quivering Cult’s ‘Retreat’ (Called ‘Get Them Married’) that Promoted Arranged Marriages for Teen Girls – Quivering Advocates Are Anti-Adult Singleness and Anti-Celibacy

Salvation Army Bans Duggar / Quivering Cult’s ‘Retreat’ (Called ‘Get Them Married’) that Promoted Arranged Marriages for Teen Girls – Quivering Advocates Are Anti-Adult Singleness and Anti-Celibacy 

Before I present you with the links to the news reports about this story (which are much farther down the page), I wanted to make some introductory comments in general, and a few specific comments refuting a few points from a pro-Quivering page about celibacy.

In regards to the specific news story I am blogging about today, this Quivering group is completely overlooking Apostle Paul’s comments in (Link): 1 Corinthians 7 that it is better for people to remain single than it is to marry – and Paul does not say that this teaching is in regards only to “a few,” or only a “minority” of people.

The Bible nowhere states that marriage is “a norm,” or that God expects or wants all, or most, people to marry.

It just so happens that in other cultures thousands of years ago, most people did happen to marry – one should not deduce from this cultural situation that God supported it or wanted it to be so. It just was what it was.

If the Bible said that all or most ancient Jews painted their bodies green once a year and balanced weasels on their heads while jumping up and down on a watermelon one week out of a year, one should not assume from this that

  • 1. God created that cultural practice and/or that
  • 2. God wanted Americans in the year 2016 to practice these things as well.

The Quivering group’s position on marriage, celibacy, and singleness is unbiblical, not to mention disturbing.

According to this article (linked to much farther below), the Quivering group was going to call this event, (where they set up marriages for little girls to marry), “Get Them Married.”

Why not have an event called, per 1 Corinthians 7, “It Is Better To Stay Unmarried”?

Am I opposed to marriage? No.

Is the God of the Bible against marriage? No.

But the Bible does not say that being married is better or more holy for girls, women, or culture, than being single, but a lot of Christian groups, and these wacky Christian cults, insist otherwise.

Christians need to do a better job of recognizing adult singleness and celibacy as legitimate, godly, biblical lifestyles and choices for all persons (and not only meant for a small minority of people who were supposedly “gifted” with it), instead of promoting marriage and natalism as the only legitimate avenues or as ways of fixing culture, the nation, or as pleasing God.

Continue reading “Salvation Army Bans Duggar / Quivering Cult’s ‘Retreat’ (Called ‘Get Them Married’) that Promoted Arranged Marriages for Teen Girls – Quivering Advocates Are Anti-Adult Singleness and Anti-Celibacy”

Stop Pressuring Women to Be Moms: It’s Insulting to Assume We All Want The Same Thing by R K Bussel

Stop Pressuring Women to Be Moms: It’s Insulting to Assume We All Want The Same Thing by R K Bussel

(Link): Stop Pressuring Women to Be Moms: It’s Insulting to Assume We All Want The Same Thing

Excerpts

  • I used to wonder why my childfree friends were so adamant about what they didn’t want—but I get it now
  • We talk a lot about freedom of choice when it comes to reproduction, but there’s still one choice that women face an unconscionable amount of backlash over: the decision not to have kids. In an essay for (Link): Marie Claire, writer Starre Vartan details the opposition she’s faced in the dating and medical arenas over her choice to remain childfree, with a gynecologist telling her “That’s what we’re here for” and two boyfriends deliberately removing condoms during sex in a disgusting attempt to force her to change her mind:
  • “I…explained how terrified I was, physically and mentally, to be pregnant, to care for needy small humans. Two different, otherwise wonderful, handsome, and brilliant men said they ‘understood’ after I opened up about my fears. And then they each promptly sabotaged the birth control that I was very strict about.”
  • Assuming that all women automatically want kids is insulting—to everyone. It insults those who do plan to have kids or are parents already by diminishing the sheer amount of physical and emotional labor that goes into the undertaking. It insults those who don’t want kids, or aren’t sure, by elevating motherhood above every other option….
  • …Nobody wins by coercing someone else into becoming a parent, or making someone feel guilty, damaged or ostracized for not wanting kids.

Continue reading “Stop Pressuring Women to Be Moms: It’s Insulting to Assume We All Want The Same Thing by R K Bussel”

James Dobson’s Flawed Take on Population Decline (no.1: We’re Not in Decline) by T. Grant

James Dobson’s Flawed Take on Population Decline (no.1: We’re Not in Decline) by T. Grant

As this report notes (link is much farther down this blog page), more pressure is placed on WOMEN to marry and have children than is placed on MEN.

I know that culture and Christians can treat single / celibate / childless men like trash, but they are TEN TIMES worse on Christian WOMEN in these regards.

Women get far more pressured to marry and have kids than men do or ever will.

Women get more shamed and insulted by Christians (and at times, secular culture) for staying single, celibate, and childless than males ever are.

Just because most women are capable of carrying a baby inside them, society and churches think it’s their DUTY to have a baby (as though women serve no other purpose in life), and if they choose to opt out (or cannot have a kid), they are still marginalized or insulted for it.

Men don’t face nearly as much insult or pressure to have kids as women do.

I am right of center – but I agree with this left wing (liberal) guy that other right wingers such as Dobson’s real goal is to be against what he perceives as liberal threats to the church or culture. That is one very real motivator some right wingers have, in why they do things like harass women to have children.

I also want to say how utterly moronic I find this approach by Dobson.

Continue reading “James Dobson’s Flawed Take on Population Decline (no.1: We’re Not in Decline) by T. Grant”

Pedophiles Seeking Christian Wives in Churches – Another Reason to be Leery of the “Equally Yoked” Idea and Reconsider Church as a Place to Meet Singles

Pedophiles Seeking Christian Wives in Churches – Another Reason to be Leery of the “Equally Yoked” Idea and Reconsider Church as a Place to Meet Singles

I skimmed over this really long blog post, on Brent Detwiler’s site (link much farther below), about a guy, Caffery, who was jailed for pedophilia. Caffery has more than one victim, if I remember right.

Caffery wrote a book at one point claiming that belief in Christ changed his life for the better, and so on and so forth (amazingly, he was molesting kids while writing this book – during the same time frame).

Caffery also wrote (in a book or a letter to his church elders, I forget which) that he was afraid if his wife gave birth to a daughter, he would molest his own daughter, so he prayed and asked God for sons. His wife went on to give birth to all sons. (I think the blog post says he later had a daughter by his second wife.)

Let me pause here to say: if I were dating or engaged to a guy who told me this upfront, that he is afraid he might molest any kids we had together, I would take him at his word and dump his ass.

(I don’t know if the woman this guy married knew beforehand or not, I’m just saying if this happened to me, I would NOT stay with a guy who confessed such a thing to me.

Never, ever stay with a guy out of pity or a sense of duty – don’t feel sorry for Mr. “I might molest our kids if we have kids together” Pervert. Helping him or redeeming such a deviant is not your responsibility. Part of the reason I got sucked into my last disaster of an engagement was that I felt sorry for the guy.)

The part that really stood out to me in this blog post by DeWiler was when Caffery said after one wife divorced him, he went looking for a new wife at a large Christian church. I found this alarming and creepy.

Continue reading “Pedophiles Seeking Christian Wives in Churches – Another Reason to be Leery of the “Equally Yoked” Idea and Reconsider Church as a Place to Meet Singles”

Stop Assuming Dads With Daughters Must Be Disappointed by R. P. Payne

Stop Assuming Dads With Daughters Must Be Disappointed by R. P. Payne

I’ve never understood men who are obsessed with sons (with having one – with being upset if their wife turns out to be pregnant with a girl rather than a boy). Or mothers who are obsessed with having daughters.

(Link): Stop Assuming Dads With Daughters Must Be Disappointed by R. P. Payne

Excerpts:

  • When my mom gets asked about our family, she’ll say she has “four grown children.” She omits the fact that all four of those children are daughters.
  • “I’m just tired of it,” she said. “The dismayed facial expressions, the pity for your dad. I’d rather just not go down that path.”
  • Fathers of daughters—even one, but especially three, four, or more—know this reaction all too well. Corey Widmer, pastor of Third Church in Richmond, Virginia, is the father to four young girls. He noticed that “90 percent of the time, when I tell people I have four girls, the reaction is negative. If it is positive, it’s usually because they came from a family of all girls.”

  • We assume, on some level, that having so many daughters must be a disappointment for dads. Ask nearly any of these fathers, though, and it’s far from the truth.

(( click here to read the rest ))

Scary Single Ladies: Rebecca Traister Explains Why Single Women Frighten The Hell Out Of The GOP

Scary Single Ladies: Rebecca Traister Explains Why Single Women Frighten The  Hell Out Of The GOP

Sometimes some of these reviews of Traister’s book, or interviews with her, bring up how so many Republicans often demonize or criticize single motherhood.

I happen to be a Republican myself, someone who was raised in a traditional Christian home.

One thing I don’t get is how so many other Republicans and Christians do in fact constantly bad-mouth single motherhood, but out of the other side of their mouths, they frequently complain that not enough women are having babies.

It ticks these types of Republicans and Christians off that baby-making rates have declined a bit in the last decade or whatever (see this link for example).

So, on the one hand, my fellow Republicans complain about women having babies (women who happen to be single), but then turn around and complain and gripe about women NOT having babies.

Christians and Republicans are somewhat inconsistent on this point. They might argue that women should marry first, and then make a baby with their spouse, but this is part of the problem: plenty of women WANT to marry, but there are no eligible males for them to marry (see this link or this link for more).

And, of course, there are married women who cannot have babies because they are infertile, or some may choose to forgo motherhood – and their choices should be respected, not condemned.

Another thing that bothers me about this conservative demonizing of single motherhood is that I suspect one view that undergirds it is that they believe that marriage or parenthood supposedly makes adults more mature, responsible or godly, which is simply (Link): not true (and see this link and this link).

(There are a lot of conservative Christians who have taught or said that people only become mature or responsible when they marry or have a kid.)

The Bible does not teach that marriage or parenthood are necessary to make a person more godly, loving, responsible, or mature.

And even every day common sense and observation bears that out: we’ve all known, or heard of, married parents who are immature, greedy, or immoral swine.

Disclaimer:

  • I am right wing and have been a Republican for years. However, I don’t always agree with Republicans on everything.
    I do occasionally agree with some of the left wing’s criticism of right wingers, and concerning how dismally right wingers treat singles, I agree with them on that.

The link I give you here is from a left wing site, by Amanda Marcotte, a liberal feminist who is (Link): sometimes hypocritical about women’s sexual issues.

Even though I completely disagree with Marcotte on some topics, I did find myself agreeing with some of the content of this interview she had with this book author:

(Link):  Scary single ladies: Rebecca Traister explains why single women frighten the hell out of the GOP by Amanda Marcotte

Excerpts:

  • Author Rebecca Traister’s new book on single women looks at how this growing population is reshaping America
  • Author Rebecca Traister’s last book, “Big Girls Don’t Cry,” took a comprehensive look at how the 2008 elections changed everything for American women.
  • Now she’s back with a similarly pop music-themed title, “All the Single Ladies: Unmarried Women and the Rise of an Independent Nation,” an examination of the role single women have played in American culture, both in our history and in our current times.
  • (Link): Single women are a potent political force in a way that they never have been before, making up nearly a quarter of the electorate and leaning to the left of both men and their married counterparts.
  • This, along with a whole host of inchoate fears about what happens when women are left to their own devices without male supervision, has led to a rash of conservative pundits and politicians denouncing the ladies who aren’t married. I interviewed Traister about this moral panic over single women and what it means for the culture at large.
  • [Question to the book author]: In your book, you detail how obsessed the conservative media has become with single women, who clearly anger right-wing pundits. The most hilarious quote you pull is Rush Limbaugh whining, “What is it with all these young, single, white women?” What is it with these conservative pundits focusing on single women?
  • It was just a couple of weeks (Link): after his tirade of Sandra Fluke that he made those comments about another woman who had written a book.
  • The fact that he said “white,” well, there are these versions of single womanhood that we are presented and the version that threatens most, is the white, privileged women.
  • Sandra Fluke testifying in front of Congress, women who are writing books, Murphy Brown, and Anita Hill, even though she’s not white, a lawyer appeared for Clarence Thomas.
  • There is a kind of woman who is economically powerful, professionally powerful who threatens a white male grip on power that has a long historic precedent in the country. Independent women living outside of marriage threaten all kinds of things about the way power is supposed to work.
  • What if reproduction is taken outside that version of male control? What if women are competing?

Continue reading “Scary Single Ladies: Rebecca Traister Explains Why Single Women Frighten The Hell Out Of The GOP”

The Single American Woman via NY Magazine

The Single American Woman via NY Magazine

Pretty long article, but very interesting.

Please use this link I’m giving you if you’d like to read the entire page (it’s a little bit farther below).

I am a right winger, have been a Republican my whole life (though the GOP has been annoying me more and more the last few years, but no, I am not fine with the Democrats), and I am a single woman who was raised in a Christian home.

My parents were Christians who had very traditional values.

The one thing I dread when reading articles like this one I am linking to in this post is imagining how my fellow right wingers will react to what it discusses.

Typically, rather than help single women where they are (which is what they should be doing), they will more likely, instead, complain and yell about singleness, about what a shame it is people aren’t marrying as much or not as young as they did decades ago, and yell at single women to run right out and get married immediately.

(One thing these types of idiots overlook is that marrying is not that easy. I’ve always wanted to be married, but I never met the right guy. I am not going to marry just any guy with a pulse just for the sake of being married.)

Anyway, following that initial reaction of my fellow right wingers, they will then, at that point – by “they,” I refer more specifically to the conservative marriage concern trolls among the secular right wingers and the conservative Christians – will write fear-mongering articles (like (Link): this one) to scare single women into marrying the first man they meet who has a pulse.

The fear mongering and pressure by conservatives to scare or cajole women to marry has gotten so bad with right wing marriage concern trolls, that some of them are even directing Christian women to marry (Link): known pornography addicts.

The majority of my fellow conservatives don’t give a rat’s ass about doing anything to assist single women so long as those women are single.

Many conservatives would prefer to sit back in their rocking chair on the front porch, sipping on lemonade, smoking on their pipes, complaining about how times have changed for the worst, and how the nation was so much better back in 1952. They would rather pine away for the so-called “good old days” than to help people in practical ways in 2016 where ever they find themselves in life.

Though I am right wing, I think this author makes a few good arguments against conservative views about singleness and marriage and the roles of women.

(Link): The Single American Woman via NY Magazine

Excerpts:

  • The most powerful voter this year, who in her rapidly increasing numbers has become an entirely new category of citizen, is THE SingleAmerican Woman
  • By REBECCA TRAISTER
  • ….In 2009, the proportion of American women who were married dropped below 50 percent. In other words, for the first time in American history, single women (including those who were never married, widowed, divorced, or separated) outnumbered married women.
  • Perhaps even more strikingly, the number of adults younger than 34 who had never married was up to 46 percent, rising 12 percentage points in less than a decade. For women under 30, the likelihood of being married has become astonishingly small: Today, only around 20 percent of Americans ages 18–29 are wed, compared to nearly 60 percent in 1960.
  • It is a radical upheaval, a national reckoning with massive social and political implications. Across classes, and races, we are seeing a wholesale revision of what female life might entail.
  • We are living through the invention of independent female adulthood as a norm, not an aberration, and the creation of an entirely new population: adult women who are no longer economically, socially, sexually, or reproductively dependent on or defined by the men they marry.
  • This reorganization of our citizenry, unlike the social movements that preceded it and made it possible — from abolition and suffrage and labor fights of the 19th and early-20th centuries to the civil-rights, women’s, and gay-rights movements of the mid-20th century — is not a self-consciously politicized event. Today’s women are, for the most part, not abstaining from or delaying marriage to prove a point about equality.
  • They are doing it because they have internalized assumptions that just a half-century ago would have seemed radical: that it’s okay for them not to be married; that they are whole people able to live full professional, economic, social, sexual, and parental lives on their own if they don’t happen to meet a person to whom they want to legally bind themselves.
  • The most radical of feminist ideas—the disestablishment of marriage — has been so widely embraced as to have become habit, drained of its political intent but ever-more potent insofar as it has refashioned the course of average female life.

Continue reading “The Single American Woman via NY Magazine”

Why Single Women Have Baby Fear Of Missing Out – via Daily Beast

Why Single Women Have Baby Fear Of Missing Out – by L. Crocker – via Daily Beast

Fortunately for me, I never cared much if I had any children or not, so I’m “meh” about not having kids.

(Link):  Why Single Women Have Baby FOMO by L. Crocker

Excerpts:

  • Single women have more power, influence, and freedom than ever before—but that freedom is still complicated by child-bearing.
  • It’s not easy for single women of a certain age to revel in their singledom. There comes a time—one that varies depending on cultural, geographic, and socioeconomic backgrounds—when the single woman in America feels like an anomaly among her peers, regardless of whether she’s single by choice or not.
  • In reality, the opposite is true: There are more single women now than ever.
  • In 2009, the number of American women who were married fell below 50 percent, and the number of women younger than 34 who had never been married climbed to 46 percent.
  • The numbers reflect a broader cultural shift that has allotted single women more power, influence, and freedom than ever before.
  • We’ve seen the single woman’s rise touted in books like Kate Bolick’s (Link): Spinster (2015), about how the author has managed to live independently for 39 years, taking cues from other unconventional women. We’ve seen it in television shows about powerful single women, too, like Liz Lemon in 30 Rock.
  • Now, feminist writer Rebecca Traister shows us just how far we’ve come in 50 years in her new book, All the Single Ladies: Unmarried Women and the Rise of an Independent Nation. (New York magazine ran a cover story adapted from the book last week, a viral essay about the (Link): value of the single woman’s vote in this election cycle.)
  • All the Single Ladies argues that single women, “untethered from the energy-sucking and identity-sapping institution of marriage in its older forms,” have long played crucial roles in our country’s defining social movements, from abolitionism to suffragism to feminism.

Continue reading “Why Single Women Have Baby Fear Of Missing Out – via Daily Beast”

If condoms are OK for Zika, why not Aids, Pope Francis? by B. Ellen

If condoms are OK for Zika, why not Aids, Pope Francis? by B. Ellen

This editorial: “If condoms are OK for Zika, why not Aids, Pope Francis? by B. Ellen is farther down the page.

I have explained before on this blog that I am not Roman Catholic, and that I disagree with their theology (ie, their rejection of sola fide, sola scriptura, etc).

However, I find that Protestant attitudes on topics sometimes parallel what Roman Catholics (specifically, the Pope) says or thinks, so I do occasionally post about sexuality, dating, marriage, etc, as it intersects Roman Catholicism.

There are some Baptists and Protestants who seem to feel that the only purpose for sex is for pro-creation. If I am not mistaken, that is the Roman Catholic position on sex as well – all sex is supposedly meant to create pregnancy, that a person isn’t to have sex just for the sheer enjoyment of the act. I disagree.

Anyway, I found this interesting. Some in the media are framing the current Pope as saying it’s acceptable for women to use birth control rather than risk getting pregnant and having a fetus with Zika.

I find this a bit confusing, as a p_r_o_Life Twitter page I follow, which is Roman Catholic, if I am not mistaken, believes that a celibate woman is just as bad as a woman who gets an abortion.

These types of P_r_o_Life Catholics really feel it is a woman’s DUTY or only value in life to have a baby – it’s absolutely contrary to what the Bible teaches and is incredibly sexist. I have blogged on that before here:

(Link):  Pope suggests contraceptives could be used to slow spread of Zika

  • (CNN) Pope Francis suggested that contraceptives may be used to prevent the spread of the Zika virus, despite the church’s longstanding ban on most forms of birth control.

Continue reading “If condoms are OK for Zika, why not Aids, Pope Francis? by B. Ellen”

Facebook’s motherhood challenge makes me want to punch my computer screen by F. Everett

Facebook’s motherhood challenge makes me want to punch my computer screen by F. Everett

I am friends with people on Facebook who have told me in private that their mother friends – one lady is Facebook friends with a sister of hers who has three kids – are actually terrible parents in real life.

Yet, these same terrible mothers who blather on about how wonderful their children are when they are on Facebook, who post scads of posts of their smiling kids, yell and scream at the kids in real life – or neglect them.

Remember that every time you see posts by parents on Facebook, with their sweet family snaps, who are bragging about their children. They are often times selectively editing their social media to present a glossy, happy version of their life that may not be real most of the time.

(Link):  Facebook’s motherhood challenge makes me want to punch my computer screen by F. Everett

(Link): Mommy Blogger Confesses in Blog Post that Mommy Blogging is a Bunch of Fake, Happy-Clappy B.S. – Kind of Like Most Christian Adult Singleness Blogs

  • Of course it’s meant to be a bit of fun, but this smug club fetishises motherhood, and creates a new way to measure women and find them wanting
  • There are certain phrases that make my heart sink. After “Can I be really honest?” and “Mind if I join you, ladies?” the latest to engender a sense of creeping misery must surely be (Link):Facebook motherhood challenge.Of uncertain origin, this viral “challenge” demands that mothers post a series of pictures that make them “proud to be a mum” and then tag other women who they think are “great mothers”.
  • Many of my friends have done this, bouncily posting shots of themselves with interchangeable babies, all of whom look like glow-worms in padded snowsuits, and tagging whole lists of other “awesome mums” inviting them to do the same.
  • And while I fully understand that they have no intention of hurting anyone, that they are simply happy to have their wonderful children, #blessed, #lovinglife and so on, I still want to punch the screen of my computer in whenever a new one pops up.
  •  The most offensive aspect of this is the idea that it’s a “challenge” at all.
  • A challenge is coping with grief when you wish you were dead, or pushing your mind and body to the limit in a feat of superhuman endurance. It’s not posting a few snaps of your toddler and waiting for your friends to type “aw gorgeous hun xxx” underneath. And it’s unclear whether the challenge in question is to prove what a great mother you are, or merely to challenge your friends to prove that they are too.
  •  This insidious idea of (Link): motherhood as a beatific vocational calling began with the Virgin Mary, and reached its peak with the Victorian notion of “the angel of the hearth”, when mothers who didn’t have to work, and had nannies and housekeepers and nursery maids rushing about looking after their children, were depicted as celestial beings radiating goodness, their sole purpose on Earth to gather little children to their rustling taffeta bosoms and gently instruct them.

Continue reading “Facebook’s motherhood challenge makes me want to punch my computer screen by F. Everett”

Leaving Christianity gave me the fairy-tale ending I always wanted / Divorce and pre-marital sex destroyed my relationship with Christianity by T. Sheehan

Leaving Christianity gave me the fairy-tale ending I always wanted / Divorce and pre-marital sex destroyed my relationship with Christianity by T. Sheehan

Even though the details of my life and situation are different, I sure did relate to this lady’s story.

My eye brow did raise at one or two points of this essay, such as her claim that people at her church encouraged her to get an abortion when she became pregnant out of wedlock, and from the way she discusses her church, they sound pretty conservative and legalistic.

Perhaps she is telling the truth and that really did happen, it’s just that most conservative Christians are pro-life, not pro-choice, so I am having a hard time picturing any of them advising a pregnant woman to get an abortion.

With possibly a few wacko Protestant church exceptions, (Link): like this one, where the church’s preacher allegedly encouraged the women members to get abortions. But then, of course, there is information such as this: (Link): 2015 Poll: 70% of American Women Who Have Abortions Identify As Christian

By and large, though, most churches are pro-life, not pro-choice.

At one point in this essay, Sheehan says that although she and her male friend were not having sex, that due to being constantly suspected and accused of having sex by Christians at her church, is actually what in large measure drove her and her boyfriend to become sexually active with one another.

Major irony there. Or maybe not…

As I have said time and again at my blog, most Christians, just like secular culture, just blindly assumes that celibacy is impossible for anyone over the age of 25 or so, and that it is impossible for men and women to be platonic friends.

It is entirely possible for men and women to remain friends, and it is entirely possible for an adult to stay celibate for months or years at a time.

I have also explained before, in previous posts, that one reason there is so much fornication among Christian singles is precisely because most Christians have such low expectations: they expect that single adults will, or have, had sex outside of marriage. It becomes a self-fulfilling prophecy quite often.

The couple discussed in this post were expected, assumed to be, and suspected by their fellow congregants of sleeping together; this couple got tired of being falsely accused, so they figured, well, we might as well have sex, since everyone is already assuming we are and harassing us over it.

I also notice that one reason this woman’s husband, who was a Christian at one time, but is now an atheist or agnostic, began losing his faith over how miserably his grief (over the death of his father) was mishandled by Christians.

Oh yes, I relate: after my family member’s passing a few years ago, rather than receiving love, empathy, and encouragement from Christians in my family or churches I went to, I instead received judgment, criticism, platitudes, or indifference. This in turn is one of several things that caused me to partially leave the Christian faith.

One of a few things that caused Sheehan to leave the faith is over how one church she attended mishandled her abusive marriage – her priest told her to stay with the abusive husband.

This advice is also usually given in Baptist or Protestant situations. Christians often put keeping an (abusive) marriage before the welfare of the two persons who comprise the marriage.

Abused wives are usually instructed to stay with the abusive spouse and submit to the abuser more, or just pray about things. None of this resolves the situation but actually prolongs it.

I am not surprised in light of all the insensitive treatment that she and her husband endured at the hands of other believers, that they both developed major doubts about Christianity and walked away from it.

There were a few supportive comments to the woman who wrote this, in the comments area under the essay, but there were also a lot of hateful, judgmental, or naive posts left to her by Christians.

There were also a few annoying posts by atheists who were just there to say “all religion is idiotic, there is no God” to any of the well-meaning, yet naive Christians who were telling her to hold on to the faith, in spite of the Christians who had been mean to her at her prior churches.

Honestly, I wish those types of atheists would refrain from posting under articles like this one by Sheehan. I find their opportunistic, anti-theism drivel and rants to be about as bad as the nasty posts by the Christians who scolded Sheehan for leaving Christianity.

(Link): Leaving Christianity gave me the fairy-tale ending I always wanted 

  • Divorce and pre-marital sex destroyed my relationship with Christianity by T. Sheehan
  • My family has always been part of the Catholic Church, including being actively involved in fighting for those beliefs in Ireland and France through the centuries. It is all I knew and I never imagined a life without it. Even in today’s permissive society, divorce is still a huge don’t in the Catholic Church.

    When my priest advised me to stay in an abusive marriage rather than lose access to the Catholic religion, I stayed — until my husband left me for one of the many women he had been seeing.

    I went back to my priest for help but instead found myself without a church.

    Confused and directionless, I ended up seeking help at a Word of Faith Christian Church in Texas.

    Although the church and I both believed in Jesus, the similarities ended there. Everything was so different from what I had grown up with, it made the transition very difficult.

    They kept trying to break down my identity by using scripture to suggest that everything about me, from Catholicism to my Irish culture, was evil and against God. It was like going through spiritual boot camp as they attempted to rebuild me into a person that could gain access to heaven.

    During my time there, I met my current husband. He was also having a tough time as his father had died suddenly the year before, causing him to question the church he had been raised in and even the existence of God due to how they handled his grief.

    We became really good friends who spent hours talking as we each struggled with our sheltered worlds collapsing around us, no matter how hard we tried to fight to keep the walls intact.

    The damage in our lives, caused by blind devotion to a religion, forced us to question all the truths we had been raised to believe.

    Continue reading “Leaving Christianity gave me the fairy-tale ending I always wanted / Divorce and pre-marital sex destroyed my relationship with Christianity by T. Sheehan”

Woman Rapes Her Own 1 Year Old Biological Son Sells Video To Pedo

Woman Rapes Her Own 1 Year Old Biological Son Sells Video To Pedo

Some factions of secular culture view childfree women as being selfish or horrible. Some conservative Christians think women who do not have children – whether by choice or circumstance – are somehow failures.

Some Christians think that God’s only or primary goal for women is to marry and have children, so if you do not do either, they either look down their nose at you or think of you as some kind of monster.

Of course, another myth a lot of Christians believe is that being a parent (or being married) makes a person more mature, loving, and godly.

I think news stories like this go to show that up for the falsehood it is. This women sexually assaulted her own infant son, and for a profit – she sold video of the assault to a pedophile.

I have never had a child, but I am more ethical, godly, and mature than this woman ever will be. Christians should stop holding parenthood (or marriage) up to be some kind of barometer of a person’s morality, godliness, or success in life.

There are evangelical (and other) Christians who go on and on about “Family Values,” who think that the family is “the building block of society,” and who think all of society’s issues could vaporize if only everyone would marry and form a nuclear family of their own. What bunk! Having a kid sure as heck did not automatically make this woman a pillar of society – she raped her own child!

The Bible does not say anything about “the family” saving society.

(Link): Woman Rapes Her Own 1 Year Old Biological Son Sells Video To Pedo

Excerpts:

  • A woman who filmed the rape of a baby is now being targeted with threats by outraged members of the public. Radio New Zealand reports that 23-year-old Krystal Harvey has been sentenced to eight months of home detention, along with 100 hours of community service after she was (Link): convicted of her crimes. Numerous people believe that the punishment wasn’t harsh enough, so is this woman in danger?
  • Threats against Harvey have allegedly originated on social media, where thousands of people have united against the woman convicted of sex crimes against a child. The Facebook page Krystal Harvey Should Go To Prison has more than 3,000 followers. Meanwhile, folks on Twitter are also paying attention to this shocking case.
  • The New Zealand Herald reported earlier this week that the convicted child molester (Link): would not serve any actual jail time for her crimes. The 23-year-old woman admittedly filmed herself raping her own 1-year-old son, which she sold to a pedophile for $300. She then used the $300 to buy herself a laptop, exhibiting an incredibly low price in exchange for the bond between mother and child, and the innocence of a baby.

Continue reading “Woman Rapes Her Own 1 Year Old Biological Son Sells Video To Pedo”

GOP Consultant Rick Wilson to MSNBC: Trump Supporters ‘Childless Single Men Who Masturbate to Anime’

GOP Consultant Rick Wilson to MSNBC: Trump Supporters ‘Childless Single Men Who Masturbate to Anime’

I am right wing, and a Republican (though I am lately thinking about leaving the GOP, but not for the Democrats. Both the GOP and the Democrats are disappointing, but for different reasons).

I have said on this blog before that many Republicans (or at least a percentage) are stuck in the 1950s, and that they idolize the nuclear family. They ostracize or marginalize anyone who is not married with children (which is quite what conservative Christians do).

Some of the following links pertain to Donald Trump. I know a lot of people find Trump polarizing, but I don’t have strong opinions for or against the guy.

I don’t keep up with politics as much as I used to do, so I just happen to see the occasional blurb or Tweet about Trump. From what I’ve seen the last several months, Trump says offensive or over the top things. Every so often, he makes a point that I agree with a tiny bit.

It’s highly inappropriate for a Republican to trash un-married or childless men for any reason, but I’d also include doing so for the sake of taking Trump down a peg or two. Insulting people for being single or childless, or in the context of scoring political points, is totally uncalled for.

I suppose the GOP yea-hoo who made these disparaging remarks about single or childless people is unaware that most Americans today are single, and more and more are forgoing parenthood (Link about that and see this link).

(Link): GOP strategist slams ‘crazy’ Trump fans: ‘Childless single men who masturbate to anime’

Continue reading “GOP Consultant Rick Wilson to MSNBC: Trump Supporters ‘Childless Single Men Who Masturbate to Anime’”

In Editorial about Abortion, Left Wing Site ‘Raw Story’ Author Assumes All Or Most Young People Are Having Sex – Fornication Does Not Have To Be Taken As A Given

In Editorial about Abortion, Left Wing Site ‘Raw Story’ Author Assumes All Or Most Young People Are Having Sex – Fornication Does Not Have To Be Taken As A Given 

I usually cover my fellow right wingers on this site, how they and conservative (and liberal) Christians assume sexual self control is impossible (among other topics); how the idea of anyone remaining celibate is a foreign idea to them, or one which they mock.

Here is an example from a secular, liberal site whose author seems to assume all or most young people will have pre-marital sex (I don’t really care to focus on all the other points this pro-abortion page makes):

(Link): Who to blame for high abortion rates? The religious right — they push laws that increase the killing of fetuses by George Monbiot

Excerpts
(please note the portion I placed in bold faced type; I shall comment briefly on some of the other comments as well below the excerpts):

  • Young people have sex, whatever their elders say – they always have, and always will.
  • Those with the least information and the least access to birth control are the most likely to suffer unintended pregnancies. And what greater incentive could there be for terminating a pregnancy than a culture in which reproduction out of wedlock is a mortal sin?

Continue reading “In Editorial about Abortion, Left Wing Site ‘Raw Story’ Author Assumes All Or Most Young People Are Having Sex – Fornication Does Not Have To Be Taken As A Given”

Parents Who Regret Having Children Speak Honestly About Why It Was A Huge Mistake

Parents Who Regret Having Children Speak Honestly About Why It Was A Huge Mistake

(Link): Parents who regret having children speak honestly about why it was a huge mistake

Excerpt:

  • Jan 6, 2016
  • Not everyone is cut out for parenthood – mums and dads who readily admit their mistakes explain why it was a bad idea for them
  • Parenthood is something no man or woman should enter into lightly – and any mum or dad will tell you it’s hard work.
  •  

    Indeed, once you have kids, your life is never the same again.

  •  

    For some people, those changes are life-altering in a completely positive way. “I can’t remember life before the kids came along,” they will tell their friends with a smile.

  •  

    But for others, welcoming new life into the world just wasn’t ever the right thing to do for them, personally.

  •  

    Parents who regret having children have been (Link): sharing their thoughts on Q&A website Quora , explaining why starting a family wasn’t the best decision they’ve ever made.

  • ….2. “There’s a huge taboo about saying you simply hate being a parent”
  • One dad explains that he never wanted to have children and his wife felt the same, until she was around the age of 40 and discovered an ‘unquenchable desire for motherhood.’
  •  

    After several rounds of IVF and ‘huge time, financial and emotional costs’ a healthy son came along.

  •  

    The man, who remains anonymous, said he was “immediately plunged into a seemingly endless spiral of resentment and depression.”

  •  

    He continues: “I knew at a profound level that I Did Not Want This. It completely destroyed spontaneity and flexibility; everything needed planning, and our son like all very small children needed to be watched pretty much 24/7.”

Continue reading “Parents Who Regret Having Children Speak Honestly About Why It Was A Huge Mistake”

Christian Publication Seems To Take Stance Against Uterus Transplants

Christian Publication Seems To Take Stance Against Uterus Transplants

This page appears on Christian news site, World.

(Link):  Will uterus transplants eventually violate all natural boundaries?

  • The Cleveland Clinic this month (Link): announced it would begin a clinical trial of uterus transplants—taking uteri from dead women and transplanting them into healthy women in their twenties and thirties who have ovaries but lack a uterus (an uncommon problem accounting for 3 percent of female infertility).

I would take it that the publication is against the idea of women getting a uterus transplant. It is again, a Christian magazine.

I have no idea why Christians are so hypocritical on this matter, that they pressure and shame women into having children, yet, if a woman has problems conceiving, they condemn her for availing herself of medical technology to help.

I wrote of this topic more here, in an earlier blog post:

(Link):  Hypocrisy: Conservative Christians / Catholics Pressure Women To Feel Their Only Worth is in Becoming Mothers, But If Women Try to Use Medical Technology to Get Pregnant, the Women Are Condemned by The Same Groups

———————–

Related:

(Link):   Marriage, Parenthood, Judgment by Christians and Non Christians – You Can’t Win No Matter What Choice You Make

(Link): Praying for a Child – The Catholic Church makes life impossible for infertile women.

(Link):  A Woman’s Fertility is Her Own Business, not Everyone Else’s by L. Bates

(Link): Baby Making Fixation at Christianity Today Magazine Online – Shaming Women For Not Procreating, or For Delaying Motherhood, or For Limiting the Number of Children

(Link):  Hypocrisy in Christian Culture – Those who idolize parenting chide infertiles for trying to have kids

(Link):  “Who is my mother and who are my brothers?” – one of the most excellent Christian rebuttals I have seen against the Christian idolatry of marriage and natalism, and in support of adult singleness and celibacy – from CBE’s site

(Link): Pro-Life, Yet Anti-Celibacy, Anti-Childless Christian Site Tweets Story about Mother Who Slit New Born Infant Son’s Throat to Save Her Sex Life (Christians equating single or childless / childfree women to women who murder their babies)

(Link): Pro-Life, Christian Sites that Flirt With Denigrating Singleness and Childlessness In Their Quest to Argue Against Abortion / Re Eric Metaxas etc

(Link): Renting a Womb – Women Reduced to Baby Breeders (editorial from CP)

(Link):  Remaining childless can be wise and meaningful. The pope should know Gaby Hinsliff

(Link): Christians Advise Singles To Follow Certain Dating Advice But Then Shame, Criticize, or Punish Singles When That Advice Does Not Work

(Link):  Why do we still have to justify the choice to be child-free? by H. Freeman

(Link):  Are Marriage and Family A Woman’s Highest Calling? by Marcia Wolf – and other links that address the Christian fallacy that a woman’s most godly or only proper role is as wife and mother

2015 Poll: 70% of American Women Who Have Abortions Identify As Christian

2015 Poll: 70% of American Women Who Have Abortions Identify As Christian

And 40% are regular church goers.

I’m not sure what percentage of these women are married vs. single.

Anyway, it would appear that self professing Christians are no more successful at following the Bible’s or Jesus’ teachings than Non-Christians.

If any of these women are un-married, wow, the church needs to once more re-emphasize that single adults are directed by the Bible to sexually abstain – be celibate.

If these women were celibate, they wouldn’t be having sex, and hence, obviously, would not be becoming pregnant and not feel the need to get abortions.

But too much Christians today are too afraid to speak out against sexual sin, including (Link): preachers, because doing so (Link): may upset the sensitive feelings of Delicate Debbie,  Weepy Wendy, Sensitive Steven, Fornicating Fred, or Mopey Mike.

If, as many conservative Christians believe, being a mother makes a woman more loving, godly, and mature, why do so many Christian women who become pregnant get that child aborted?

Christians really need to re-think how they measure passage into maturity, adulthood, and how they measure sanctification, because getting married or getting pregnant (ie, having a baby) does not necessarily make a person more mature, loving, or godly, as these sorts of examples on my blog continue to show.

(Link):  4 in 10 women who have had abortions are regular churchgoers

  • by Harry Farley
  • Four in ten women who have had abortions are regular churchgoers, new figures by (Link): LifeWay Research reveal.
  • The church is more likely to be a place of gossip, judgement and condemnation than care or help for women who are considering abortion, the study shows.
  • This is despite the fact that 70 per cent of women who have had abortions claim a Christian religious preference and 43 per cent were attending church at least once a month at the time of their abortion.
  • ….Perhaps because it is such a taboo, the church is becoming increasingly irrelevant for women deciding whether to have an abortion.

Continue reading “2015 Poll: 70% of American Women Who Have Abortions Identify As Christian”

Childless Women: Are They Safe? (Parody, Humor)

Childless Women: Are They Safe?

The following is PARODY. It’s not to be taken seriously.

It’s actually poking fun at the stupid stereotypes that pro-natalist types have against the childfree and childless.

I’d like to point out, for the billionth time on my blog, that it’s WOMEN who bear the brunt of this crap! Men seldom to never get beat up, interrogated, or shamed for not having children.

By mere fact of owning a vagina and a uterus, women are expected by almost everyone in every culture to get pregnant and have a kid – for Christians, this is not cool, because the Bible is fine with people being single and celibate.

Anyway, the following is parody; don’t get offended by it. It’s a round-about way of mocking the stereotypes people have against the childless and childfree.

(Link): Childless Women: Are They Safe? by Becky Brown

Excerpts:

  • It’s a common misconception that women without children are just like other people. Wrong! Childless women choose not to have children deliberately to make moms feel uncomfortable with our choices. It’s time we take a “pregnant” pause and ask the question: Are childless women safe?
  • I had cocktails with my co-worker recently, and, being the caring and sensitive person I consider myself to be—qualities a mother has naturally—I wanted to get to know her better. When I asked her if she had any children, she said “No.” This was an awkward moment because I spit out my drink all over her, but also because I saw my co-worker for who she really is: childless, and currently putting me in danger.
  • …I came up with a few safe assumptions:
  • Childless women have more time to become dangerous criminals.
  • Women usually have reasons for not having children. Whatever their reasons may be—whether it’s a demanding career or simply because their womb was cursed by a witch—they’re just not spending any time raising children, which leaves them with excess leisure time. That leaves a lot of time for criminal activities such as using illegal drugs and participating in organized crime, for all we know!

  • Childless women are probably in a cult.

  • It’s safe to assume that childless women are likely part of some extremist cult that celebrates their bizarre life choices. Only some kind of weird mind control could keep a woman from the incredibly natural urge to procreate and mold a young person in her image. Keep this in mind if you allow your children to interact with these women. Kids are extremely impressionable, and you want to avoid questions about “where Debbie went” when she dies in a mass suicide. Children are extremely delicate and good.

Pro-Life, Christian Sites that Flirt With Denigrating Singleness and Childlessness In Their Quest to Argue Against Abortion / Re Eric Metaxas etc

Pro-Life, Christian Sites that Flirt With Denigrating Singleness and Childlessness In Their Quest to Argue Against Abortion / Re Eric Metaxas etc

If you are new to this blog: I am pro-life. I do not support abortion.

I have traditional values, and was completely a Christian up until a couple years ago; I currently reside somewhere between being a Christian and being agnostic. I am not hostile towards traditional marriage or “the family.”

I do, however, object to the fact that many conservative Christians have turned marriage and family into deity, and they marginalize and shame anyone who has not married or had children.

One troubling aspect I see in Christian sites or blogs that champion traditional values, or ones that argue against abortion, is a propensity to equate adult singleness, celibacy, and remaining childless to being selfish, to being opposed to God, the Bible, or biblical values.

Many times, these sites that argue for the nuclear family and against abortion do not take into account that many adult singles are remaining single not by choice, but due to circumstance.

See, for example, this post on this blog:

(Link):  Want To But Can’t – The One Christian Demographic Being Continually Ignored by Christians Re: Marriage

I myself had wanted to marry, but my relationship with my fiance did not work out so I had to break up with him, and I have not met anyone suitable since.

I cannot put a gun to a man’s head and force him to marry me, nor do I want to order a male-order mail groom, nor do I have a magic wand where I can wave it about and make a man appear out of thin air.

I don’t think Christians who obsessively advocate for marriage, natalism, and the nuclear family, appreciate that getting married is not as simple or easy as they seem to think it is.

For more on that typical mindset among Christians, please see this post at this blog: (Link):  Typical Conservative Assumption: If you want marriage bad enough (or at all), Mr. Right will magically appear

I follow the site “Life News” on Twitter, and I tend to agree with many, though not all, of their views. I am not sure, but I think Life News is a Roman Catholic based organization, but many of their view points sound similar to Protestant or Baptist positions on marriage, abortion, and other topics.

Life News is a very pro-life site, which I am fine with. However, today, they tweeted a link to this page, and I do have some misgivings by how they have represented singleness and the state of being childless, via this editorial by Eric Metaxas:

(Link): “Choice,” Abortion Behind Worldwide Demographic Spiral by Eric Metaxas

I’m not sure, but I believe that Metaxas is Protestant. At any rate, here are some excerpts:

  • by Eric Metaxas
  • As you might suspect, this pro-choice “age of possibility” has room for almost anything—except children. Brooks notes: “The number of Americans who are living alone has shot up from 9 percent in 1950 to 28 percent today. In 1990, 65 percent of Americans said that children are very important to a successful marriage. Now, only 41 percent of Americans say they believe that.
  • And here’s the kicker: “There are now more American houses with dogs than with children.”

Continue reading “Pro-Life, Christian Sites that Flirt With Denigrating Singleness and Childlessness In Their Quest to Argue Against Abortion / Re Eric Metaxas etc”