views and thoughts on topics, especially ones pertaining to christianity – with an emphasis on how most christians either ignore or discriminate against unmarried christians – and how christians have turned marriage and parenting into IDOLS and how there is no true support for sexual purity, virginity, or celibacy among christians – this is a blog for me to vent; I seldom permit dissenting views. I don't debate dissenters ————-
Charlize Theron, Bella Thorne & More Celebs Who Totally Get the Dating Struggle
As I said a couple of years ago, even if you, by the world’s standards, are perfect and great dating material – you’re wealthy, famous, successful, and sexy – you are still not guaranteed an easy or great dating life or marriage.
Look at all the celebrities who meet all the criteria that Christian and secular dating advisors tell us we should gain before we are worthy to date, yet who can’t get a date, or they go through one break up after another.
The next time you’re sitting there, trying to find a way to get out of a really awkward, terrible date without being obvious about it, just think to yourself: Britney Spears has to deal with this, too. “I had a really bad date. I mean, it was really bad,” she recently told Marie Claire. “I’ve been single for ages and had a date with a guy I liked. I was getting anxious, worrying he wouldn’t like me.”
WashPost Columnist: ‘Ghostbusters’ Haters Are ‘Virgin Losers’ – (via NewsBusters Site); Both the Right and Left Wing Get Some things Wrong About This
This story comes from NewsBusters, which is discussing a column written for Washington Post newspaper by columnist Kristen Page-Kirby about the new Ghostbusters movie.
The original Ghostbusters movie, released in the 1980s, contained four male leads. The reboot version of the movie, which was released July 15, 2016, contains four women leads instead.
Unfortunately, over a year or more ago, when news came out that there would be four women leads in the film, some of the sexist jerkwads who inhabit the internet started lambasting the movie all over You Tube, Twitter, and where ever else – not because the move was bad (it wasn’t even released yet), but because they were incensed that Hollywood was cramming some form of feminism down their throats.
Interestingly, I didn’t see as much backlash over the main character of the new Star Wars film, “Star Wars: The Force Awakens” being a woman – Rey.
Ghostbusters Logo
At any rate, I will be discussing two or three different topics in this post that are related to this new film, or mentioned by the conservative essayist at the NewsBusters site.
This is another story where I am in the middle. I can’t say as though I’m completely on one side or another in regards to some aspects of this story, depending on what is under discussion.
I am currently a moderate right-winger (I used to be more to the right than I am currently. In the last few years, I’ve been reconsidering if some of my former political and Christian beliefs are wrong.)
I’ve been more open the last few years to hearing the criticisms and views of liberals and Non-Christians – which is not to say I agree with everything I see left wingers and Non-Christians espousing or arguing in favor of.
I sometimes think secular, liberal feminists have good points on some topics, but I normally disagree with them.
As far as the Ghostbusters film reboot is concerned, I do think some of the backlash against the movie does in fact stem from sexism. But then, I do think some people may honestly feel that the movie is genuinely bad due to having a poor story line, or what have you.
I have not seen the movie yet. I don’t go to movie theaters that much anymore.
I usually wait until movies air on cable television; I’m willing to bet that this Ghostbusters reboot will probably be shown on F/X channel, or SyFy, or some other cable network in the next two years, and I have cable television, so I don’t know if I want to invest my time and cash into driving down to a theater to see this, since it will eventually be on television.
I saw the original Ghostbusters in a movie theater when it was in theaters in the 1980s. I was a kid at the time.
The original was okay, it was quite enjoyable and plenty of fun, but it was no movie masterpiece, so to all the men online who were griping about the reboot featuring all women leads: get the hell over it already.
And yes, you were, or are, being sexist douche bags about it. I don’t buy for a moment that ALL male griping about the film is based on non-sexist reasons, like shoddy trailers, or supposed poor CG work.
The vast majority of the professional reviews (and I have read a ton of them) for the new Ghostbusters film have deemed it “okay.” -Not terrible. Not great. But just “meh.” It’s so-so, most reviews have said.
What I don’t appreciate is that the columnist for WaPo who was discussing male backlash about the movie is using virginity as an insult.
Let me start by saying that addressing gossip is something I have never done. I don’t like to give energy to the business of lies, but I wanted to participate in a larger conversation that has already begun and needs to continue. Since I’m not on social media, I decided to put my thoughts here in writing.
For the record, I am not pregnant. What I am is fed up. I’m fed up with the sport-like scrutiny and body shaming that occurs daily under the guise of “journalism,” the “First Amendment” and “celebrity news.”
…If I am some kind of symbol to some people out there, then clearly I am an example of the lens through which we, as a society, view our mothers, daughters, sisters, wives, female friends and colleagues. The objectification and scrutiny we put women through is absurd and disturbing. The way I am portrayed by the media is simply a reflection of how we see and portray women in general, measured against some warped standard of beauty.
…But I really can’t tell myself that anymore because the reality is the stalking and objectification I’ve experienced first-hand, going on decades now, reflects the warped way we calculatea woman’s worth.
No, I Do Not Like Richonne (Rick and Michonne as Romantic Couple on television series The Walking Dead) – Sex Can Be Risky in the Apocalypse
This may be, perhaps, the only, or one of the very few, anti- Richonne blog posts on the internet.
To any Richonne Fans Who Are Reading This
If you have not seen my “About” page (and I currently have this stated at the top of the blog itself), I seldom permit dissenting views to be published on my blog.
Therefore, if you are a rabid Richonne supporter who leaves me a nasty, rude comment in response to this post, I likely will not publish it.
I don’t even bother to read the entirety of such posts – the moment I glance a few cuss words or rudeness in the first sentence of a post that is pending, awaiting me to grant permission to publish it, I hit the “trash can” button and delete it. I don’t even read the entire thing once I have ascertained it’s a vitriolic post.
So please, don’t waste your time or mine by composing one.
There is an addendum below addressing people on Twitter who were commenting to me how having Michonne, a black woman, in a romance with a white guy on this TV show, was supposedly oh- so- important. I have addressed those types of comments much farther blow (towards the end of the post, before the “Related Posts” section).
I did an internet search or two in the days after the February 21, 2016 airing of the zombie apocalypse show The Walking Dead episode in which the Rick Grimes character has sex with the Michonne character for the first time.
In the vast majority of reaction I see in blog posts or comments on entertainment sites that discuss “Richonne,” most people appear approving or enthusiastic about this TV show pairing. I cannot fathom why this is so.
I remain perplexed at the drooling, nutty, overboard enthusiasm so many TV viewers have for wanting to see TV characters date each other.
Further, if you dare disagree on these other sites about “Richonne” and admit to disliking “Richonne,” no matter how politely you state your views, many of these “Richonne” supporters become unhinged and vitriolic.
I happen to like the Michonne character and the Rick character – Rick has always been one of my favorite characters on the show. I have nothing against either actor who plays these characters.
However, I do not like or enjoy a Michonne-Rick romantic pairing.
I did not enjoy the show attempting to romantically pair Rick up with Jessie, either.
(Jessie was later killed by being eaten by zombies).
I mention this early on, as a lot of these Richonne fans wrongly assume anyone who dislikes “Richonne” must be a “Jessie – Rick shipper.”
Why I’m Glad I Married a Celibate ‘Tim Tebow’ by L. Haywood
Some people are leaving comments below this editorial on another site, the one by Haywood, saying the media got it wrong: Tebow never dated this Olivia person.
I don’t know if he ever dated her or not. I find this editorial by Haywood is still relevant, because even if Tebow never dated Olivia What’s-her-name, the fact is, he got ridiculed a lot in the media for being an adult virgin / celibate.
People who chose to abstain sexually at any age should not be mocked for this choice.
It’s gotten a little old how society (I’d say liberals are really bad about this especially), expect folks who hold really traditional values of totally embracing and accepting homosexual behavior, transgenderism, and hetero fornication, but they draw the line at accepting and supporting people who choose to remain virgins or to practice celibacy.
To recap: even if Tebow never did date Olivia I-Forget-Her-Last-Name, the fact remains that his choice to sexually abstain was in fact mocked and ridiculed when this story first broke, that she supposedly broke up with him for refusing to perform.
So, I find many of the points in this editorial still cogent:
Former Miss Universe and Miss USA Olivia Culpo broke up with NFL star Tim Tebow because he reportedly wouldn’t have sex with her. This has made the headlines but I believe she has no idea what she just squandered. She may be beautiful but sexually clueless.
Here’s why I think she is sexually clueless:
…. Marrying a man who pledges himself to purity says that you’re more valuable to him then temporary gratification. We’re going into our 23rd year of marriage and I’m so glad that he waited for me. Jerome’s season of waiting showed me and my sons how valuable I am to him.
… Tebow is fascinating to people partly because the culture cannot accept the fact that a professional athlete does not indulge in a wild, partying lifestyle, or at least a sexually active one.
It’s almost as if the public (and particularly the media) don’t believe that people who believe in God and actively, honestly live out their faith even exist anymore.
The Rev. Michael Sliney, a Catholic priest and the New York chaplain of the Lumen Institute, an association of business and cultural leaders, said, “I deeply admire Tim Tebow for persevering in this noble ideal — a true witness of self-mastery and respect for the sacredness of the sexual act.”
It’s an interesting point, particularly when it comes to respect. And despite what either side of this argument believes, shouldn’t Tebow have the right to make his own decisions when it comes to what he feels is respecting himself and others?
…. There are multiple viable reasons people, religious or not, choose to remain chaste until marriage. Tebow should not be publicly ridiculed for his decision to do so, and his example is rare but refreshing in an overly sexualized culture.
So long story short, it’s a report that should have come as no surprise since Tebow has (Link): already had one relationship end because of his moral stand and maybe, just maybe, God-forbid engender some sense of begrudging respect from the media elite for at least having the courage of his convictions, has instead triggered a few juvenile headlines and one-liners from a legion of sports reporters who would never be allowed in the same room as a Miss USA, current or former. Unless they bought a ticket.
News Reports: Tim Tebow’s Girlfriend Allegedly Breaks Up With Him Because He Won’t Have Sex With Her
Condolences to Mr. Tebow, but he’s probably better off without her, since she doesn’t respect or apparently share his values.
I’m a fellow celibate adult. I’m over 40 years of age and haven’t had sex yet. I can appreciate how daunting and difficult it can be to be a single, celibate adult both in and out of church.
I first saw this story by way of Janet Mefferd’s Twitter.
I conveyed to Mrs. Mefferd that we celibate, single adults get no respect in or out of the church, which is true. Liberals especially are bad about this; they defend any and all sexual choices except for celibacy. They hold celibacy in contempt and usually ridicule it.
Christians do nothing to defend celibacy for adults who are over the age of 30 or so; they generally assume if you are over 29 years of age, you’ve either already had sex or will be doing so.
If this media report is true, I hope that it does not sour Mr. Tebow on all women. I do think the percentage of men or women who respect virginity in a mate has gone down – I actually have a link on my blog to a page where a men’s magazine advises men from dating lady virgins – but there are still some people out there who do respect a person for waiting, and who will date you.
The (Link): New York Daily News reports former Miss USA Olivia Culpo broke up with Tebow because he wouldn’t have sex with her due to his abstinent lifestyle.
Russell Wilson, Ciara, and Who Else Is Not Having Sex
You know what most of these writers and most of the media never report on or comment on? People who are still virgins over the age of 30.
They marvel at these celebrities who are around 27 or 34 years old (which the following page I link you to discusses), ones who were previously fornicating, but who become engaged, and then stay celibate until their wedding day six months later.
Big deal.
I’m over 40 and haven’t had sex at all… the Christian media is not celebrating adults such as myself. (And I have a sex drive.)
This also points out one minor point I mentioned once or twice before on my own blog- not everyone is having sex. But you wouldn’t know this from our hyper sexualized cutlure.
This page below also links to a few articles I’ve linked to here on my blog a year or more ago.
….But the public face of abstinence is changing. It’s no longer just teens from super-Christian homes or the ones we fear will ditch their promise rings any day now. Take the case of Seattle Seahawks quarterback Russell Wilson and hip-hop singer Ciara.
Wilson, 26 years old and a practicing Christian, ended his marriage to his high school sweetheart two years ago. Ciara—known for songs such as “Goodies,” “1-2 Step,” and, most recently, “Dance Like We’re Making Love”—has dated a string of rappers and has a young son. Because both of them are attractive, famous adults who have been in sexual relationships in the past, many would assume they’d inevitably sleep together. It’s the 21st century, and that’s what hot people do. But at Wilson’s request, they chose not to.
….Evangelicals constantly point out elements of today’s hyper-sexualized culture: the rise of sexting, widespread porn use, the normalization of cohabitation, and the prevalence of revealing images of women in the media. These things remain significant issues as the church promotes a Christian sexual ethic. But for all the concerns about the place of sex in our society, this counter-trend—singles opting out of sex by choice or by circumstance—rarely comes up.
TV Already Has Enough Token Homosexuals – Daryl Dixon Should Remain a Celibate Hetero Single – and Not All Older Single Men Are Homosexual
Oh brother. I seriously doubt that The Walking Dead writers are going to actually make fan favorite Daryl Dixon a homosexual, but it sure makes for good publicity.
I cannot, off the top of my head, think of any television show that has an adult single over the age of 30 who is a virgin and who is living a celibate life.
I cannot think of many progressive Christian or secular writers who support adult virgins, celibates, or asexuals. They will sit around blogging in support of every form of sexuality or sexual deviancy under the sun but for people who chose to abstain from sex.
About the entire cast of the GLEE television series was homosexual. The television series “Modern Family” has a homosexual couple who adopted a child. “Will and Grace” featured two homosexual guys as their main characters. “Faking It” is an MTV show about a girl who thinks she might be a lesbian.
There have been several other shows over the years that have featured homosexuals and lesbians. The world does not need anymore homosexual or lesbian characters, any more than the world needs another marriage sermon (see this page).
If folks are going to insist that each and every form of sexuality get equal screen time, I want to see more adult single, hetero virgin/celibate characters. Maybe also include some adult celibate homosexual characters, too.
It is so cliched’ for every character on a show to date, sex it up, or marry – there’s nothing special or interesting about it. One of the reasons I like the Daryl Dixon character is precisely due to the fact he seemingly lacks a love life and sex. It’s just him and his crossbow, shooting zombies in their faces.
No, Daryl Dixon should not be made into a homosexual character who dates. I also don’t want to see him get a girlfriend. Him getting into any sort of sexual or romantic relationship would ruin the character to a degree, maybe totally.
I also want to say that one common view that pops up on pages that report this story is damaging to hetero virgin men who are over 25 or so years of age: the assumption is that if people do not see a man over 25, 30 or older with a woman, he MUST be a homosexual.
This knee-jerk reflection is very insulting and offensive to hetero males who are single into adulthood, ones with Christian or traditional values who don’t believe that homosexual behavior is moral. Just because a man is not dating a woman, has never dated, or has never married or never had sex with a woman, does NOT necessarily mean he is a closeted homosexual or is one in practice.
There are asexual and celibate older HETERO men out there (just as there are asexual and celibate older HETERO women too).
Nick Jonas Losing Christian Image as ‘Racy’ Music Video Set to Release
Didn’t we just go through this about six months ago with Hannah Montana? (See link at bottom of this post under “Related Posts” for more on that.)
In the future, if we get anymore teen or 20 something pop singers, I hope music journalists ask them,
“Look, you are only 14 years old now, you have a wholesome image, and you claim to be a virgin and sexually pure now…
Is this just an act? Five or six years from now, can we expect you, like 99% of teen singers before you, to say all the “sexually pure” stuff was a put-on, that you found it restrictive and you were really just dying to pose half nude for magazines and grab your crotch in music videos?”
Because this crap seems pretty par the course now.
Why, why, does our culture – or kids in the culture – equate being sexy, or having sex, with full-fledged adulthood? (And… See link at bottom of this post under “Related Posts” for more on that.)
More accurate barometers of adulthood:
-Having a tedious 9 to 5 office job with an incompetent boss and annoying co-workers and not hanging yourself or losing your sanity from it
-(if you have your own home) paying a mortgage
-realizing some of your dreams and goals, held since childhood, may never come to pass -and learning how to cope with that
-learning to accept yourself, flaws and all, and not to care so much what other people think about you
If you’re over 40, you can probably come up with a few more things to add to that list.
I am going to guess (and I may be wrong, I’m just guessing based on this news story below), that the upcoming Jonas music video will include scantily clad females with really big, silicon-enhanced boobs (ie, standard video vixens), dancing around this Jonas guy, and him looking all “come hither” into the camera and possibly grinding on the next- to- nude models?
Being “skanky sleazy = adult” to this Jonas guy and to a lot of these Miley Cyrus types, sadly (see the article below for more on that).
Conversely, these guys think
being civilized, having standards, being respectable = “in chains, repressed,” etc.
I would like to inform folks who think like Jonas does that tarting yourself up and being overly sexual in music videos is not going to make you happy or bring you instant maturity.
Movie actress Marilyn Monroe, who died in 1962 and is still widely regarded as the world’s utmost sex symbol, grew to detest being known only, or primarily, as a sex kitten.
Monroe wanted to be taken seriously; it’s a theme that came up every so often in her interviews. She took acting classes at the prestigious Actor’s Studio at one point, in a bid to be taken seriously by everyone.
After years of making films in Hollywood, Monroe moved to New York and started her own production company to get out of the dumb and sexy roles Hollywood studio executives kept forcing her into. Her production company allowed her to take on slightly deeper, or more varied, movie roles.
Another funny observation here of how being skanky, sleazy, and sexy – or having a sexy public persona – won’t bring you the gravitas and “grown up” image you think it will:
If you paid attention to pop culture back in the 1980s (or, if you weren’t even born yet, pay attention and learn something), you may recall that George Michael, who was once the lead singer of the Brit pop duo “Wham!” and who later became a solo act – was so tired of being thought a dirty sexy sex symbol poster boy, he released the song “FREEDOM,” which included the lyrics expressing his desire to be taken seriously and his despair of being thought nothing but a pretty, sexy face:
[FREEDOM LYRICS – GEORGE MICHAEL]
Heaven knows I was just a young boy
Didn’t know what I wanted to be
I was every little hungry schoolgirls pride and joy
And I guess it was enough for me
To win the race? a prettier face
Brand new clothes and a big fat place
On your rock and roll TV
But today the way I play the game is not the same
No way
Think I’m gonna get me some happy
I think there’s something you should know
I think it’s time I told you so
There’s something deep inside of me
There’s someone else I’ve got to be
Take back your picture in a frame
Take back your singing in the rain
I just hope you understand
Sometimes the clothes do not make the man
… Well it looks like the road to heaven
But it feels like the road to hell
When I knew which side my bread was buttered
I took the knife as well
Posing for another picture
Everybody’s got to sell
But when you shake your ass
They notice fast
And some mistakes were build to last
Yeah, see, that whole pop song was an expression of how empty it was to be a public sex symbol.
And in the 1980s, George Michael was pretty popular, especially with the young teen ladies (this was years and years before his homosexuality became public).
Yet, these teeny bopper, or young 20 somethings of today, think if they show some skin, sleep around, that this will make them feel or look like an adult. It won’t. They should learn from people such as Marilyn Monroe and George Michael who went down that road and found out it’s unsatisfying.
By the way, I’m tired of the Virgin Shaming and Celibacy Shaming inherent in such moves by these entertainers.
These pop singers, who are now about 25, are basically saying they resented once having stood for sexual purity. After marketing themselves as sexually wholesome stage acts when they are 13 or 16 years old, they turn around when they are 23 or 24, when they are about to drop a new album or video, and say how much they actually despised the virginity shtick in their younger days – well thanks so much, pal!
Nick Jonas, the youngest sibling of former pop band The Jonas Brothers, is set to release a new solo music video and sources say it might destroy his Christian image.
The Jonas Brothers dissolved in Oct. 2013 as the brothers decided to go their separate ways in the professional world. Now the youngest brother is preparing to release a single of his own called “Chains.”
According to Breathecast.com, the new music video is going to express his dissatisfaction with the years spent as the wholesome “character” of Nick Jonas.
A source told the New York Post that Jonas “has emancipated himself from the squeaky-clean shackles of former purity ring-wearing boy band The Jonas Brothers.”
“Nick has spent years experiencing a burden that’s hard to explain. He feels free now for the first time in his life. He’s making music he believes in. He’s done saying sorry for everything and trying to be perfect. He’s just going to be himself. If people like him, great. If not, he’s done giving a [expletive].”
The Jonas brothers were previously known for their Christian upbringing; the group wore purity rings and spoke openly about their decisions to wait until marriage to have sex, but discarded the rings later on.
An official release date for the music video has yet to be set.
Her chances of conceiving are less than five per cent and her odds of having a child with down syndrome are ‘one in four or five’
This marks the longest time in 27 years that Mrs Duggar has not been pregnant
The strictly Christian family does not believe in birth control
By ANNABEL FENWICK ELLIOTT
PUBLISHED: 10:34 EST, 20 May 2014 | UPDATED: 12:07 EST, 20 May 2014
Michelle and Jim Bob Duggar, parents to 19 children already, have visited a fertility doctor in a bid to see whether they are ‘ready’ for another baby.
‘We would love more children if God saw fit to give us more, I just want to make sure that I am ready to catch a baby if that would happen’, explains Mrs Duggar, 47, star of 19 Kids and Counting, in a clip on Today.com from tonight’s episode of the TLC show.
‘My goal is to find out where I am in my life, hormonally speaking,’ she says of visiting Dr Paul Wendel, an OB-GYN specializing in high-risk pregnancies.
Michelle and Jim Bob Duggar, parents to 19 children already, have visited a fertility doctor in a bid to see whether they are ‘ready’ for another baby.
‘We would love more children if God saw fit to give us more, I just want to make sure that I am ready to catch a baby if that would happen’, explains Mrs Duggar, 47, star of 19 Kids and Counting, in a clip on Today.com from tonight’s episode of the TLC show.
‘My goal is to find out where I am in my life, hormonally speaking,’ she says of visiting Dr Paul Wendel, an OB-GYN specializing in high-risk pregnancies.
Michelle and Jim Bob Duggar, parents to 19 children already, have visited a fertility doctor in a bid to see whether they are ‘ready’ for another baby.
‘We would love more children if God saw fit to give us more, I just want to make sure that I am ready to catch a baby if that would happen’, explains Mrs Duggar, 47, star of 19 Kids and Counting, in a clip on Today.com from tonight’s episode of the TLC show.
‘My goal is to find out where I am in my life, hormonally speaking,’ she says of visiting Dr Paul Wendel, an OB-GYN specializing in high-risk pregnancies.
Kirk Cameron (Christian actor): ‘Fornicators and adulterers’ worse than homosexual marriage.
Left wing sites are flipping out because actor Kirk Cameron said (to summarize), “‘Fornicators and adulterers’ worse than gay marriage.”
Not only are some in shock, but some of the other left wingers are angry that Cameron is discussing the topic at all. They don’t think the guy should have any opinions about sex or publicize them.
Even though Cameron is criticizing other Christians for obsessing about being against homosexual marriage – which should make some of these die hard, liberal yea-hoo’s happy – they are still complaining. You can’t make everyone happy, no matter what you do.
Said one commentator at Huffington Post, “why is Cameron discussing other people’s sex lives, why is he so interested in who other people screw” or something.
Well, genius, it’s because everyone else is, including guys like you.
Liberals, atheists, ex Christians, and emergents claim to be non-judgmental about sex, but they are in fact very judgemental – many of them ridicule abstinence and the idea of staying a virgin until marriage, and those groups never. shut. up. about. sex, even if it’s to sit back and criticize how Christians feel about sex.
It’s on their (ie, liberal, ex-Christian, atheist, liberal Christian) blogs all the time, from how they feel Christians and Republicans are too preoccupied about sexual purity, to when they themselves make every fourth story on their forums and blogs about sex.
And liberals and ex-Christians won’t STFU already about homosexuals, homosexuality, and homosexual marriage.
Cameron is on the right track to aim at the church and call them out for THEIR sexual sin, instead of lambasting a bunch of Non-Christians who are into homosexuality.
If the church starts taking a stronger stance against hetero sexual sin (especially as taking place among self professing Christians), that will make it ten times easier to combat the unquestioning acceptance of homosexuality in churches these days.
I’ve pretty much been saying the same thing as Cameron there for the last few years on this blog, and I tweeted this to Cameron a few months ago (I have no idea if he saw it):
I’ve also said time and again in previous threads that the Bible does not call Christians to fight secular culture.
I am not against Christians speaking their minds, voting in politicians who are anti- abortion and so on and so forth.
I’m not saying Christians should totally toss in the towel and completely halt writing editorials against homosexuality, homosexual marriage, abortion, and other social issues that are near to their hearts, but maybe dial it back several notches.
I get very annoyed by militant atheists and secularists who pretty much want to force or intimidate Christians into keeping their values and opinions to themselves.
If Christians want to write editorials or books arguing against abortion and homosexuality, or supporting theism and traditional marriage, that is their right.
My problem with Christians on this topic is largely the amount of emphasis.
BY DUSTIN SIGGINS
Thu May 01, 2014 15:28 EST
Tags: Celibacy, Chastity, Megan Alexander, Premarital Sex
NEW YORK, NY, May 1, 2014 (LifeSiteNews.com) — Megan Alexander is known for being the New York City Correspondent for the gossip tabloid show and website Inside Edition. This week, Alexander decided to open up a little about her personal life, explaining how she “accepted Jesus Christ as my Lord and Savior in about 7th grade and made” the decision to be sexually abstinent until marriage.
Alexander told Fox News that she wants people to know that “it’s okay to wait [to have sex] if you want to.” A narrator also says that Alexander opened up “to provide an alternative view of sex in a world where sex before marriage is almost expected.”
Her decision contrasts with the often public sexcapades of much of her industry. “I don’t think it’s so uncommon around the world and around America in everyday life” to abstain from sex until marriage, she said, “but in the entertainment industry it’s definitely not popular.”
Alexander, who has been with Inside Edition since 2007, married husband Brian Cournoyer in 2008. She said that they set boundaries for their relationship, and that helped keep her celibate until their wedding day.
Alexander’s views on abstinence came to light after she wrote for WHOAwomen Magazine on why “Marriage Still Matters.” In it, she says modern young people “live for ourselves, not each other, and we wonder why there are so many broken homes and broken lives in our culture.”
She also wrote that keeping busy, “setting goals,” and having a boyfriend who shared her views on chastity really helped. While Cournoyer was not a virgin when they began dating, he willingly sought “a ‘second virginity'” with Alexander.
… In addition to telling young people “don’t look to Hollywood for advice on marriage,” Alexander said things weren’t exactly perfect on their wedding night. “We put way too much pressure on ourselves to have the sexual aspect of our marriage all figured out.” She wrote that her husband said, “Well, honey, we have the rest of our lives to work on it!” on the honeymoon, which was part of the communication she calls “essential.”
I don’t like to post solely about homosexuality on my blog. Some of the only times I blog about the topic is how it reflects upon, or intersects with, issues pertaining to hetero celibacy, or how Christians today are dealing with discussing sexual sin.
As I’ve pointed out previously on this blog the last couple years, the vast majority of Christians – not just Non-Christians, but conservative Christians now – are now attacking sexual purity, celibacy, and virginity.
Some of them do this on the basis that teaching about those topics causes fornicators, that is, those who willingly had sex before marriage, to feel guilty, offended, or ashamed.
This page by Idleman points out that some of the same strategies being used to excuse or downplay heterosexual sex sins are also being used to excuse, condone, or downplay homosexual sexual sins.
Here are some excerpts:
Gay Marriage What Does God Say Not Jars of Clay by Shane Idleman
Dan Haseltine (singer for Jars of Clay) used Twitter recently to support gay-marriage; stating,
“Because most people read and interpret scripture wrong. I don’t think scripture ‘clearly’ states much of anything regarding morality.”
Many say that we cannot take a position on homosexuality because all positions will hurt someone.
Here’s my question: “Are those who defend homosexuality, or who say nothing, truly loving the homosexual, or are they simply seeking to avoid conflict?” If they are more worried about being liked than being truthful, do they really care for homosexuals more than the person who is willing to risk their reputation, and quite possibly their safety, in order to speak the truth in love?
Jennifer Garner: ‘I wish I’d waited until I was 30 for marriage’
And I was just saying about a week ago that women (especially from religious families) should wait until age 40 to marry, not in the early 20s as so many Christians are pushing for the last couple of years.
BY JOYCE CHEN / NEW YORK DAILY NEWS
TUESDAY, FEBRUARY 7, 2012, 7:00 AM
Jennifer Garner did a lot of growing up between the ages of 13 and 30, and one big lesson she learned during that period was how to properly pace the major milestones of her life.
The soon-to-be mother of three opened up to Britain’s The Sun about being raised by strong, confident women and how that has impacted her in the Hollywood realm — namely, when it comes to love.
“I did marry in my 20s [to Scott Foley, who she divorced eight years ago] and I found divorce a crushing experience,” she told the newspaper. “I thought the divorce statistics would never apply to me. I was beyond heartbroken when they did.”
Following her divorce from “Felicity” co-star Foley, Garner, now 39, started dating Ben Affleck and the two wed in 2005.
Jennifer Garner says that she wishes she had waited until 30 to get married, and implies that she would like to wipe her marriage to Scott Foley off the record.
Jennifer Garner has revealed that she wishes she had waited until after her 30th birthday to tie the knot for her first marriage.
“Everyone reaches maturity at different times. I wish I’d known to wait for marriage until I was 30 or over,” Garner tells The Sun, referring to her marriage to actor Scott Foley, whom she had met on the set of “Felicity.” While the dimpled pair married in 2000, they filed for divorce just two and a half years later.
“I did marry in my twenties and I found divorce a crushing experience,” Garner continues. “I thought the divorce statistics would never apply to me. I was beyond heartbroken when they did.”
After Foley and Garner finalized their divorce, she began seeing her “Alias” co-star Michael Vartan. When that romance ended in 2004, she started dating current husband Ben Affleck, who she had co-starred with in the film “Daredevil” while she was still married.
“I got up and got on with it. I also kept my belief in marriage,” Garner said. “I did not have a fairytale vision of the future but I still believed I would find someone to commit to and raise kids with.”
Garner and Affleck married in 2005 in a private ceremony in the Caribbean. And of course Garner sings her husband’s praises to the newspaper.
She is heavily pregnant with her third child to Ben Affleck but ahead of her 40th birthday Jennifer Garner has been reflecting on past experiences.
The actress, 39, who married actor Scott Foley when she was in her twenties has revealed that she regrets marrying so young.
Speaking to the Sun Jennifer said: ‘I wish I’d known to wait for marriage until I was 30 or over.
I did marry in my twenties and I found divorce a crushing experience.’
The marriage lasted just four years and the couple divorced in 2004.
Opening up about the experience Jennifer admitted it left her ‘beyond heartbroken,’ but added: ‘But I got up and got on with it. I also kept my belief in marriage.’
Shortly after her divorce from Foley, Jennifer began dating Ben Affleck and the couple married in June 2005.
The acting duo have two daughters together, Violet, six, and Seraphina, three, and they are currently expecting their third child who is due any day now.
The 39-year-old actress met her first husband, Felicity co-star Scott Foley, when she was just 22, and now she says she regrets tying the knot so early in life.
“I wish I’d known to wait for marriage until I was 30 or over,” Garner told Britain’s Sun newspaper in an interview. “I did marry in my twenties and I found divorce a crushing experience.”
Garner married Foley in 2000 and they divorced in 2004 and she soon began dating Ben Affleck, whom she married in 2005 and has two daughters with, Violet, 6, and Seraphina, 3.
She said that the demise of her four-year marriage was devastating. “I thought the divorce statistics would never apply to me. I was beyond heartbroken when they did.”
Actress Jennifer Garner believes she wasn’t mature enough to enter into her first marriage with Scott Foley at 28 and wishes she had waited to tie the knot.
The 39-year-old, who is currently married to actor Ben Affleck, first tied the knot with Foley in October 2000 and their union ended just three years later, reported Contactmusic.
“Everyone reaches maturity at a different times. I wish I’d known to wait for marriage until I was 30 or over. I did marry in my twenties and I found divorce a crushing experience.
Celebrity Deems Herself A Born Again Virgin And Vows to Stay Celibate “For A Year” – Oh Puh-leaze
Oh geeze. Just stop. Stop making a mockery out of virginity, celibacy, and chastity. If you’ve already had sex, you are not a virgin.
If you’re going to refrain from sex for only a year knowing damn well you’re going to start again later, don’t even bother trying to depict yourself as a “celibate” to the rest of the culture.
GEMMA Collins and Arg may have been flirting up a storm on the TOWIE series 11 premiere, but make no mistake – our Gems isn’t looking for love.
by Emma Kelly/Published 25th February 2014
The 33-year-old has been nursing a broken heart since splitting with her fiancé Rami Hawash, and isn’t planning on rebounding as part of her recovery plan.
Speaking to Heat, the bubbly blonde said: “I’m a born again virgin. I’m not looking for any man. I’m off sex and men – and I’ll be staying well away. I’ve taken a chastity vow, hopefully for a year.
“I went through such a bad time that the thought of going out with someone else is just a big no. I’m not looking for love. I’ve got no interest.”
The reality TV star split from her ex just four weeks after he proposed with a pear-shaped diamond ring at Christmas.
On the heels of her just announced second porno, Farrah Abraham has declared that “sex isn’t what it used to be” and she’s going to be a virgin (again?) or a nun. Okay boo. [Celebuzz]
She says she “wants to be a virgin forever.” Too late for that, sweetheart.
Sorry, guys. Farrah Abraham has given up on the back door… and the front door, for that matter.
The Teen Mom who took it all off for $10,000 is tired of feeling used by the porn industry who graciously let her extend her 15 minutes with the cinematic masterpiece Farrah 2: Backdoor and More.
In fact, she’s so disenchanted with movie-making love-making that not only ruined her life, but her sex life as well.
So she’s taking a vow of celibacy.
Cue applause.
“People use sex for power and manipulation when sex is supposed to be enjoyable and great,” she told Life & Style. “I don’t feel that, I want to be a virgin forever — or a nun.
“I don’t feel like sex is what it used to be.”
To be fair, after fantasy fetish swings and limo romps, it’s really all downhill from there for the 21-year-old.
Paul Walker was a 40 year old movie star who was killed in a car accident a few weeks ago. I figure men like this are either very pervy, taking advantage of a teen’s lack of life experience and gullibility, or are deeply insecure and scared to death at even the idea of dating a woman their own age.
…I’ve been getting a lot of heat from commenters lately who are upset that I pointed out the widely-reported seventeen year age difference between Paul Walker and his longtime girlfriend Jasmine Pilchard-Gosnell.
His death was undeniably tragic, and no one is bringing that into question, but in reading posts about the loved ones who survived him, I was coming across some disturbing information.
I kept seeing Jasmine’s age listed as twenty-three right next to information that said they’d been dating for seven years. Given that Paul was forty at the time of his death, that meant that when they started dating, Paul was thirty-three and Jasmine was…sixteen.
I thought that was a thing we could all agree on as unacceptable, given that Paul was a parent by the time Jasmine was eight years old and started dating her when she was still a sophomore in high school, but some readers of our readers disagree.
Particularly in light of Paul’s sudden and tragic death in a car accident this past weekend, they aren’t ready to hear anything about him that isn’t a glowing review of his admirable accomplishments. And understandably so. In the days after someone dies, especially someone famous, the last thing people want to be reminded of is not only the fact that he was a human being who makes mistakes, but that they never knew him at all.
To that end, I’ve been getting a lot of really hateful commentary from people who are upset with me for suggesting that there’s anything wrong with a thirty-three year old man dating a sixteen-year old girl.
I’ve heard things like ‘you can’t put a number on love’ and ‘the age of consent is 16 in California’ and ‘who are you to judge’? That’s a good question — who am I to judge? Well, not that it matters, since we have a lot of laws specifically designed to do that judging for us, but I’m someone who was in a very similar situation.
Since you ask.
When I was sixteen, I had occasion to meet the twenty-four year old man who in a few short months would take my virginity. (On New Years Eve. With his socks on.)
He wasn’t famous and he wasn’t Paul Walker, but he was an older male who showed me inappropriate sexual attention, and that was enough. He was only eight years older than me instead of the seventeen that Paul had on Jasmine, but I was really impressed with myself for being able to attract someone that much older and, in my mind, more mature.
BY MORGAN LEE , CHRISTIAN POST REPORTER
December 2, 2013|12:59 pm
Despite growing up in a Pentecostal church that his father pastored, Joe Jonas no longer sees himself as religious, crediting part of his disillusionment to a scandal that rocked the congregation.
“We eventually left our church, Assembly of God, when I was 14. A scandal had erupted involving stolen money, and it caused a big rift in the church. After that the concept of church really upset me for a long time,” Jonas shared in a recent interview with Vulture. “I mean, I believe in God, and that’s a personal relationship that I have, but I’m not religious in any way.”
Jonas, who was formerly part of pop rock band The Jonas Brothers, also said that at an early age he felt the pressure of pleasing and conforming to others’ standards.
“To some extent, I was used to growing up in public. I was a pastor’s kid, so eyes were always on me, even then. I sat in the first pew of the church, and I had to wear a suit every Sunday, because my parents wanted me to be this role model that I didn’t always want to be,” Jonas said.
…In an exceptionally raw and frank interview, Jonas also mentioned that although he had made a good-faith, preteen, commitment with Christian abstinence organization True Love Waits to keep his virginity until marriage and donned a “purity ring” as an 11-year-old, he was overwhelmed when this became the focus of media attention when the band started to blow up.
“The topic that dominated news coverage of us for a long time was the whole promise-ring thing. We couldn’t escape it,” said Jonas.
“I remember this interview with this guy whose entire agenda was to focus on the rings. He kept pushing the subject, and when we insisted that we didn’t want to talk about it, he told us, ‘I can write whatever I want,’ which terrified us,” he added. “That’s the thing: We didn’t know any better, and we just wanted to make people happy. Now I know that I don’t have to answer any questions I don’t want to. Like, why do you even care about my 15-year-old brother’s sex life?”
Jonas was increasingly frustrated when he felt that something that he did not want to be an issue, became something that fans were emulating.
“People were coming up to us, saying, “Thank you so much, I’m waiting because you guys are, too!” And we just thought, No! That’s not what we’re about,” said Jonas, who noted that he lost his virginity when he was 20.
Pro Ball Player Convicted for Kid Diddling Three Kids Claims to be an Outstanding Christian (and he’s married with a kid of his own) – again, why should Christian single gals limit themselves to only marrying Christian men? The Whole “Being Yoked Equally” thing is irrelevant and unduly limiting for singles
I was told my whole life by Christians it would be wrong for me to marry a Non-Christian because the Bible has one sentence that says “do not be yoked to an unbeliever.”
I ran into a few decent Non-Christian guys growing up, but no, couldn’t get into a romantic relationship with them or marry them, because according to Christian folklore, if I just kept “trusting in the Lord” and praying about my marital future, in due time God would send me a Christian Prince Charming.
I find myself still never-married in my early 40s.
There is no, there was no, Christian Prince Charming that was my reward for staying a virgin, for being a good Christian girl who prayed, had faith, and waited on “God’s timing” or for “God’s Best.”
Meanwhile, as a single, other singles and myself go ignored by the Christian community, when they are not harboring insulting stereotypes about older singles (such as all unmarried women are harlots that will steal married men).
Supposedly, the unmarried are not as godly, sexually pure and loving as married people with children.
Then we come across stories such as this by a guy who says he is a swell Christian – and I’m not sure, but I think he might be married with children of his own?
I cannot believe Christians expected me to hinge my entire marital relationship destiny on one measly biblical verse that contains the phrase “be not yoked to an unbeliever,” and upon reflection, I wonder what in the hell does that verse even mean?
Maybe Apostle Paul was only talking about tennis partners, for all we know.
The end result of holding that verse up as the end- all, be- all of marriage advice is tragic, though: lots of single Christian ladies like me who wanted marriage are single into our 40s.
I cannot believe a perverted guy like this gets a spouse while decent people such as myself, despite wanting to be married, can’t so much get a date for Friday night.
Oh yes, this story also works against another secular and Christian stereotype: that older, never-married men are sexual predators. Here we have a story about a MARRIED man who is a FATHER who was convicted of child sexual abuse.
Curtis claims he’s “living faith every day” — and thinks he and his victim could write a book together
BY MARY ELIZABETH WILLIAMS
Former major league outfielder Chad Curtis says he tries to “live my faith every day.” Chad Curtis is a recently convicted sex offender.
On Thursday in Hastings, Mich., the 44-year-old was sentenced to seven to 15 years in prison on six counts of second-, third- and fourth-degree criminal sexual conduct. The victims were three teenage girls he knew during his time as a high school volunteer weight-room strength trainer two years ago. When he was initially suspended from his position last year, he told reporters, “I’d ask [the community] to pray for us and pray that this would be resolved in a way that is honoring to God.”
Now, in a courtroom statement the prosecution called “an arrogant, self-serving hour-long soliloquy,” Curtis, who played for the Yankees in two winning World Series, steadfastly maintained that his victims were liars, saying, “The truth will set her free. I think this whole thing is an unfortunate situation where the whole truth has not been told. I believe her [the victim] and I could write a book someday and it would have a positive impact on a whole lot of people.” It’s a horrible, desperately insensitive thing to say, but it’s an illuminating window into the mind of a convicted sex offender – one who still bafflingly seeks connection with his accuser.
The girls all tell similar tales — of Curtis groping them under the guise of giving them athletic massages. In her account of his actions, one of his teenage victims said that he’d “he exposed her breast, covered it with his mouth and simultaneously groped her crotch.”
When she began crying, she says he swore that “he would never again succumb to his immoral impulses” and asked her to pray with him.
She says that when she refused he told her, “Prayer is always good.” According to Michigan Live, it was the same scenario with the other two victims: “Each would hear an apology. Each would receive a promise that it would not happen again.” Yet if he expressed contrition during his encounters with the victims, there was none of the kind on display during his trial or sentencing.
Judge calls the former Yankees team member a predator during sentencing
By Courtney Subramanian
Oct. 03, 2013
New York Yankees’ ex-outfielder Chad Curtis was sentenced Thursday to seven to 15 years in prison for sexual abuse by a Michigan circuit judge who called him a predator and a community threat.
Curtis, whose career spans from 1992 to 2001 and includes two World Series wins with the New York Yankees, was convicted of six counts of criminal sexual conduct in August. During a stint volunteering as a weight trainer at a Barry County high school, the ex-MLB star inappropriately touched three teenage girls.
Two 15-year-olds said he touched their buttocks while a 16-year-old girl said he touched and kissed her breasts. The 44-year-old told the court Thursday that the three girls lied, while calling himself a Christian servant.
HASTINGS, MI – As Chad Curtis delivered what a prosecutor called an arrogant, self-serving hour-long soliloquy, the three teen victims of his sexual crimes could take no more and walked out of the courtroom.
But they returned in time to hear Barry County Circuit Court Judge Amy McDowell sentence the former major leaguer and school athletic mentor to seven to 15 years in prison for his sexual assault of three girls at Lakewood High School.
“I feel like I’ve got to a point now where I have done all I can do and I can move on with my life,” said the 18-year-old, who was the victim of Curtis’ crimes in 2011 when he committed third-degree criminal sexual conduct against the then-high school senior. The crime involves sexual penetration.
… For his part, Curtis talked for an hour and accused all the victims of lying during the week-long trial in August, during which Curtis was found guilty of six counts of criminal sexual conduct.
Curtis talked of how he was playing for the Detroit Tigers, one of six teams he would play for in a 10-year career ending 2001, when he decided he wanted to become a servant of God.
Curtis talked at length about all the students he helped by getting his teaching certificate at Cornerstone University. He talked about the people he brought to Christ through his example and the lives he helped turn around even as he waited sentencing in the Barry County Jail.
“I wake up every morning and ask, ‘How can I be a positive influence in this little cell?” Curtis told the judge. “I live my faith every day.”
Curtis took exception to being called selfish by the victims and their parents, and he seemed intent on making sure the judge knew that he was not selfish.
Curtis also said he was the one rebuffing advances from the girls, who accused him of getting them alone in the school weight room and then molesting them under the guise of athletic conditioning.
He said the girls will have to come to terms with their wrong-doing.
“The truth will set her free,” he said of one of his victims.
“I think this whole thing is an unfortunate situation where the whole truth has not been told, Curtis said. “I believe her (the victim) and I could write a book someday and it would have a positive impact on a whole lot of people.”
Barry County Prosecutor Julie Nakfoor Pratt said Curtis’ statement showed an utter lack of remorse and showed that he needed to be put in prison.
“That was the most selfish, self-serving, victim-blaming statement I’ve heard in my career as a prosecutor,” Pratt said. “It speaks volumes about his character, or lack thereof.”
… Following the sentence hearing, defense attorney David Dodge gathered with supporters of his client, including Curtis’ wife and daughter, as they met in a circle and prayed in the courthouse parking lot.
Here is the first mention of Miley Cyrus’ sleazy 2013 VMA appearance since the appearance itself (in a Taylor Swift editorial) I’ve seen so far in a Christian publication, as I predicted yesterday…
Unfortunately, she’s in the minority. We as a society rarely produce an adolescent female star who can turn into a woman without going wild. Unlike some, I’m not convinced that the whole process is deliberate. But almost invariably, yesterday’s sweet little Hannah Montana becomes today’s Miley Cyrus, singing about drugs and simulating sex acts in her underwear onstage.
I’m sure in the next few days, The Christian Post will publish a few Cyrus stories as well.
Secular, conservative news sites and blogs already began issuing observations about Cyrus’ performance yesterday (with the predictable attitude that Cyrus’ seedy performance is harmful to women, shows the downfall of American morality, etc), and a few have chipped in today. It seems to take the Christian sites a little longer to get material written and published.
EDIT Later in the day (Aug 27), The Christian Post published this:
I’m still awaiting editorials from publications like Christian Post that say how horrible Miley’s example will be for young ladies, how it’s another example of how sexual morals have fallen apart, and so on.
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