Male Celebrity Says He’s Happy Being Childless – I’m Awaiting the Attacks by the Tucker Carlsons, Abby Johnsons, and Matt Walshes Shaming This Man For Being Fine With Not Having Kids

Male Celebrity Says He’s Happy Being Childless – I’m Awaiting the Attacks by the Usual: The Tucker Carlsons, Abby Johnsons, and Matt Walshes, Shaming This Man For Being Fine With Not Having Kids

Will movie actor Seth Rogen get backlash from hyper-pro-parenthood conservatives for publicly admitting that he’s fine with being childless, as did comic Chelsea Handler?

If you’re new to my blog: I’m a conservative who is not anti-family, anti-parenthood, or anti-marriage, but can see how many other conservatives have wrongly placed undue emphasis upon marriage, parenthood, and The Nuclear Family. (I am not a woke, abortion-supporting feminist progressive, in other words.)

I’ve so far seen a very small number of people on Twitter saying, “Ha ha, I’m glad Rogen isn’t reproducing” and a few that are critical of him being childfree, but there’s hardly been any resistance or criticism over his childfree choice by everyday people on that platform.

Will Tucker Carlson tell Rogen that by putting career over family, he’s ultimately choosing misery?

(On his nightly Fox news program, Carlson often likes to mock working women who are childless, he likes to argue that they are trading in motherhood – which he equates with guaranteed happiness for all women – for devoting their lives to a corporation.

I’ve never heard Carlson say to single, childless men: “You’re trading in happiness over having kids for a career, you sucker.”
This rhetoric is only directed at women. It’s a double standard.

Also, if a single, childless woman doesn’t earn a pay check, if she doesn’t hold down a job somewhere, is Tucker Carlson going to pay her rent for her, while she’s out dating, to try and find a “Mr. Right” to marry and pro-create with? My guess is no.)

Will sexist Matt Walsh (who’s correct about the transgender debate but little else) mock Rogen for “pushing 50 and being childless,” and suggest he will die alone in a room full of cats, as he did with comic Chelsea Handler? -Probably not.

Even should the usual culprits, who constantly try to shame, criticize, and fear monger women into getting pregnant and having children, should actually criticize Rogen over passing up Fatherhood, it will be a very, very rare exception that does not counter the repeated bashing of childless women that these extreme “pro family” conservatives have been aiming at women for decades.

And, I would guess that on the chance they would confront a man on his being childless, they would do so without using the same level of gross sexism and ageism at a man for passing up parenthood that they commonly direct at women, such as the phrases and jokes about “hitting the wall,” tweeting  photos of empty egg cartons, and making “crazy cat lady” jokes.

I do not think that men or women should be shamed, guilt tripped, or scared into getting married or having children, but I’ve noticed for many years that most of the criticism for being single or childless is more often than not directed at women.

(Link): Seth Rogen Says He and His Wife Are ‘Happy’ They Didn’t Have Kids

(Link): Seth Rogen: Not having kids ‘has helped me succeed’ 

Seth Rogen says he and his wife are “happy” with their “choice to not have kids” — and he believes it’s only boosted his career.

(Link): Seth Rogen claims he’s more successful because he did not have kids: ‘Honestly, thank God’

Seth Rogen and wife Lauren Miller ‘get to do whatever we want’ because they do not have kids, actor says

March 11, 2023
By Stephanie Giang-Paunon | Fox News

Seth Rogen is crediting his success to not having children.

The “Knocked Up” star candidly opened up about his personal life and the reason behind why he and his wife Lauren Miller decided not to start a family of their own.

“I do not [have kids]. That has helped me succeed as well, definitely” Rogen laughed during an interview on The Diary of a CEO podcast.

“There’s a whole huge thing I’m not doing, which is raising children.”

The 40-year-old actor continued to say he doesn’t believe having kids would make him happy.

“I’ve been around obviously a lot of children, I’m not ignorant to what it’s like…everyone I know has kids…some of my friends have had kids for decades,” he quipped.

“Some people want kids, some people don’t want kids. Honestly, you just are told, ‘You go through life, you get married, you have kids.’ That’s what happens…me and my wife, neither of us were like that.”

Bizarre: Women Who Are Genuinely Fine With Being Single or Childless and Who Publicly Admit It Deeply Disturb or Infuriate Sexist Incel Types and My Fellow Conservatives, Who Want Such Women to Harbor a Victim Mindset

Bizarre: Women Who Are Genuinely Fine With Being Single or Childless and Who Publicly Admit It Deeply Disturb or Infuriate Sexist Incel Types and My Fellow Conservatives, Who Want Such Women to Harbor a Victim Mindset

I have been a conservative person my entire life. I am not liberal, woke, or progressive.

I am not opposed to marriage, motherhood, the nuclear family, or parenthood. I do not support abortion on demand.

For years now, I have noticed the oddest, most disgusting behavior from other conservatives: many of them become unhinged, unsettled, or very angry about women who are truly happy with being single or childless or childfree. It didn’t cross my mind to blog about this observation until now.

The cherry on top of Conservative Outrage on this topic is that the fury seems to be particularly directed at single, childless women who mention on social media or in televised interviews that they’re enjoying life single and childless.

That is, from the angry conservative pro-family types, if you are single, childless (or childfree) and happy about it as a woman, you damn well just better keep it to yourself.

These pro-family conservatives, many of whom even profess to be Christian, further sometimes say things to or about those childless women and tell them personally on social media, how miserable they must be.

They chortle things at them things like, “You will die alone in a house full of cats,” and they say this as though they are filled with glee and happy at the thought of childless women dying alone and unhappy. How perverse.

Some of them, like Catholic Matt Walsh, even like to get ageist, and toss in comments about age at these women, saying to them, “You’re nearing 40…” or, “You’re almost 50….” (See (Link): example Tweet of his here.)

Ditto regarding “incels” or other types of men who are deeply sexist and ageist towards women. They too get very agitated and unglued if a woman publicly admits to being okay, content, or happy with being single or childless.

It’s as though these groups need and desperately want to believe that women who are and remain single or childless (or childfree) are lonely, bitter, miserable, and unhappy, or will become so in the future – and they need to believe that such women are deeply unhappy precisely because those women are single, childless, or childfree.

In the reverse situation, every once in awhile a woman celebrity may publicly say she’s sad that she was never able to have children – and what do the sexist conservatives and d-bag incels do, but immediately take screen captures of the comments, share them all over social media, as if to say,

“See? See?! Feminism has made women miserable. All women obviously want to marry and have babies! They are depressed if they don’t marry and have children, see, see, see!!!
“Women are unable to enjoy life or find contentment if they never marry or never have children, here is your proof, right here, this lady movie star saying she is lonely at 62 and regrets she never had children!!!!”

I’ve never been a feminist, but may I add: if some women are unhappy being childless or single, it may be in part precisely because conservatives and churches are constantly brainwashing women to think their only purpose in life, and their only road to happiness, resides in marrying and becoming pregnant.

If a woman grows up in a family, societal, or religious context that conditions her to think that she can be happy and have meaning only if she marries or has children, well, duh, don’t be surprised if yes, some women may get to adulthood and feel a little down that they’re not married or don’t have kids.

But that would be a result, in part, due to conservative, traditional, old school “family values” brainwashing. That would not be due to “feminism,” of all things

It’s as though many conservatives and sexist lunatics want single and childless women to be unhappy. It’s utterly bizarre to me.

Before I go on further, here is a pertinent article from the WSJ:

(Link): What’s That Ticking Sound? The Male Biological Clock

Men are also at the mercy of age when it comes to having kids

June 25, 2011
By Jennifer Vanderbes

A man’s age when he has children is turning out to be an important factor in that child’s health, according to WSJ contributor Jennifer Vanderbes. Kelsey Hubbard talks to the author about the role a man’s biological clock plays in a child’s risk for diseases and disorders.

Conservatives and the Double Standard Re: Lonely, Single Hetero Men

By the way, I’ve seen more and more articles the last several years that say more and more hetero men are single, and those hetero men either don’t want to date or marry (they’ve lost interest), or, some of them do want to date or marry women, but they can’t seem to get girlfriends and do not know how to go about getting dates or getting a girl friend.

So, I then began seeing news stories such as these about men who are single, some of whom are lonely:

(Link): Guy So Depressed Over Being Single He Cut Off His Own Penis (article)

(Link): ‘Transmaxxing’: Meet The Online Community Encouraging Gender Transitions For Sexually Frustrated (Incel) Men

(Link): Number of ‘Lonely, Single’ Men is on the Rise as Women with Higher Dating Standards Look for Partners Who are ‘Emotionally Available, Good Communicators, and Share Similar Values’, Says Psychologist

(Link): Dear Abby: I (Older, Single Man) Gave Up Dating Women, and 30 Years Later, I’m Lonely

(Link): Bitter, Frustrated 22 Year Old Male Virgin and Member of Men’s Rights / PUA Groups Kills Several Women Because He Couldn’t Get Dates – what an entitled sexist doof

Funny how I seldom see other conservatives mocking such men as the ones mentioned in those news articles for being single and lonely.

If anything, when these topics and news reports of men “falling behind” in culture are brought up, both conservative men and women rush to the men’s defense, to pity them and portray men in culture as being victims.

Often times, such conservatives who paint men as a group as being victims blame women for the men’s victim status, or else, they blame feminism or feminists, for the failings of men – it is so hypocritical and laughable.

By the way, as a conservative, I’ve also noticed that any time a new study or news story is published about men being single and lonely, that conservatives such as (but not limited to) Tucker Carlson will offer very understanding, compassionate, nuanced examinations about these shifts in culture leaving men out in the cold, and how society has supposedly let men down.

Carlson especially likes to invite on conservative women guest speakers on to his television program on Fox News who back Carlson up on this issue, and these women cluck in worry over those poor, poor, single men who are allegedly being kept down and single by a supposedly “feminized” culture of raving, men-hating feminists.

However, if women are under discussion – let’s say there’s a study or news story about women finding it difficult finding suitable marriage partners to marry, or what have you – those very same conservatives who pity men will revoke deep, thoughtful, compassionate analysis to instead snigger in contempt that, “feminism has made you women miserable, ha ha ha, look how  you’ve traded the bliss of family and marriage to being chained to a corporate desk! Ha ha, it’s so wonderful to see single and childless women suffering!”

The culture-wide problems that men face and the ones that women face are treated completely differently by such conservatives, with pity and empathy (and lots of excuses and justifications) being made for the failings or sadness of men,
while women, on the other hand, get roasted, demonized, mocked, and criticized, often for things and problems that they actually did not bring about, but are blamed for anyhow.

I see this phenomenon come up quite often by Tucker Carlson, Matt Walsh, sometimes Ben Shapiro, Candace Owens, and so on.

The men always get a pass, and always get rationalizations and lots of hugs, kisses, and reassurances, and the men’s failings get blamed on women, or on feminism, while the women, on the other hand, usually (wrongly), get blamed for problems they did not create, and they get ridiculed or criticized, too.

39-Year-Old Woman Goes Viral For Honest Videos On What Her Childfree Life Looks Like

39-Year-Old Woman Goes Viral For Honest Videos On What Her Childfree Life Looks Like

(Link): This Woman Went Viral For Sharing That She Ultimately Had To End A Relationship Because Her Partner Wanted Kids And She Didn’t, And It’s Something That Should Be Talked About More

“People need to stop asking women when they will have kids. Women need to be encouraged to do whatever the hell they want with their lives. Like any stigma, the more we normalize it, the better it will get.”

(Link): 39-Year-Old Woman Goes Viral For Honest Videos On What Her Childfree Life Looks Like

Excerpts:

In recent years, there has been a growing number of women who have been vocal about remaining child-free. The reasons behind their choice vary, but common ones are concerns about financial stability, the desire to focus on personal interests and careers, and broader things like overpopulation.

39-year-old Vancouver-based photographer and artist Jackie Dives is one of these advocates. In addition to her creative work, Jackie uses social media to break the ice and invites the public to talk about (not) having children.

Photographer Jackie Dives has made a conscious decision not to have kids

To normalize the discussion about this choice, she runs a TikTok vlog series

“I was surprised by how many people have commented that they experienced the same thing,” Jackie explained to BuzzFeed. “I think the root cause of this is that everyone tells women they will change their mind. You might have a strong conviction that you don’t want kids, but if everyone in your life is telling you that you will change your mind or that you will regret not having them, it can be very difficult to walk away from someone you love to stay true to your convictions.”

“People need to stop asking women when they will have kids,” Jackie said. “Women need to be encouraged to do whatever the hell they want with their lives. Like any stigma, the more we normalize it, the better it will get. People need to stop gaslighting women about what they want from their own lives.”

New Jersey Restaurant, Nettie’s, Wisely Bans Children (Good For Them) – Most People Do Not Want Screaming Kids Present or Underfoot When Eating Out

New Jersey Restaurant, Nettie’s, Wisely Bans Children (Good For Them) – Most People Do Not Want Screaming Kids Present or Underfoot When Eating Out

I don’t know how this Feb. 10, 2023 news story escaped my attention previously.

There are so many restaurants that already permit babies and children, I marvel every time a business does ban kids – you’ll see one of these news stories about once every two years – and parents get into an uproar about it and throw hissy fits.

Most people do not want to put up with loud, unruly children on airplanes, movie theaters, and restaurants.

Most parents are entitled narcissists who think everyone will or should love and adore their children as much as they do. Wrong. We don’t.

I remember going to a “help yourself” type restaurant, when I was in my 20s, where you take your dishes and tray up to the food bars, then walk your tray (loaded with food) back to your table,
and as I was walking back to my table, two kids, a boy and a girl, who must’ve been around ages 3 or 4, keep running and running in front of me, in back of me, around me in circles, because they were chasing one another (they were also screaming and yelling, treating the dining room as though it were a playground).

I was scared to death those kids would cause me to trip and fall, spilling the very hot food on myself or them or on other patrons, and someone would get burned.

I kept waiting for their irresponsible parents to tell the kids to sit down and shut up, but they did not. It’s a miracle of sorts I made it to my table without spilling anything on my tray that day.

Nobody wants to put up with that when they go out in public. Nobody.

I don’t mind if other people want to have children, but I resent being subjected to their misbehaving, loud, screaming babies, toddlers, little kids, pre-teens, or teens when I go out in public.

Now, I don’t support abortion, so if you’re a woman who gets pregnant, you should give birth and give the kid up for adoption if you don’t want to raise it yourself, but if you keep it, don’t bring the kid to a restaurant until he or she is old enough to behave.

Surprised that fellow conservatives, who are always wrong on such topics, didn’t chime in to mock a restaurant that bans kids under ten from dining there – surprised that Matt Walsh, Tucker Carlson, and all the usual hyper-pro-children persons and groups didn’t run out and do video segments or blog posts denouncing this restaurant over this, screaming or mocking them. I guess they save their bile only for single, adult, child women who are fine with being single and childless.

(Link):  Italian restaurant in New Jersey banning children under 10

Feb. 11, 2023

Nettie’s House of Spaghetti in Tinton Falls announced on its social media platforms that beginning March 8, children under 10 will not be allowed to dine there.

…According to its website, the restaurant will be closed for its winter break from Feb. 20 to March 7. The age limit ban will go into effect the following day.

Nettie’s, described as a “retro-chic pasta joint” by NJ.com, was named the state’s 28th-best Italian restaurant by the news outlet.

An age-limit at a restaurant is not new.

In 2021, Red Rooster Burgers and Grill in Garden Valley, California, banned patrons under 18 unless they were accompanied by an adult, “Today” reported. The restaurant cited bad behavior from teens that caused damage at the business.

Another California restaurant, Old Fisherman’s Grotto in Monterey, made headlines in 2018 when it banned “crying children” or youths making “loud noises,” “Today” reported. The restaurant also had a “no stroller” police in effect since 2009.

Nettie’s did not respond to “Today’s” request for comment.

(Link): New Jersey restaurant Nettie’s sparks furious debate after banning children under the age of 10

by Kelsi Karruli
February 10, 2023

A New Jersey restaurant has sparked furious debate after revealing it was banning children under the age of 10 from dining in.

Italian restaurant Nettie’s, located in Tinton Falls, New Jersey, caused a stir on social media after making the announcement.

In a Facebook post, a staff member said the ban would begin March 8, claiming its decision was due to rowdy children causing safety issues during peak dining times.

The new policy comes after another woman called for ‘adults only’ suburbs to have ‘peace and quiet’ without any disturbances from children.

Despite the growing calls for more strict no-kids rules to be enacted, the restaurant’s announcement has come under fierce criticism from many parents, triggering heated discussion about the controversial policy.

‘It’s been extremely challenging to accommodate children at Nettie’s. Between noise levels, lack of space for high chairs, cleaning up crazy messes, and the liability of kids running around the restaurant, we have decided that it’s time to take control of the situation,’ the post read.

‘This wasn’t a decision that was made lightly, but some recent events have pushed us to implement this new policy. As of March 8, the day we return from our winter break, we will no longer allow children under 10 to dine in the restaurant.

‘We know that this is going to make some of you very upset, especially those of you with very well-behaved kids, but we believe this is the right decision for our business moving forward. Thank you for understanding.’

The announcement prompted major backlash from many diners.

I’m Full of Regret at Ever Having Children Because I Miss My Old Life So Much – Why Didn’t Someone Warn Me Not to Do It?, by E. Coughland

I’m Full of Regret at Ever Having Children Because I Miss My Old Life So Much – Why Didn’t Someone Warn Me Not to Do It?, by E. Coughland

(Link): I’m full of regret at ever having children because I miss my old life so much – why didn’t someone warn me not to do it?

Feb. 1, 2023
by E. Coughland

A mum-of-two has revealed she is ‘full of regret’ at having had children and said she misses her old life.

Taking to the parenting platform Mumsnet, the British woman explained that she missed the ‘freedom and luxury’ of not having to think of everyone else all the time.

She admitted that she didn’t feel that parenting was particularly ‘rewarding’ and if someone had warned her not to have kids she might have listened.

Some people suggested that she was probably depressed, while others said they agreed that having kids was not for everyone.

The mother explained: ‘I’ve got two children who I love and they are sweet children who will (hopefully) grow into lovely people one day, and I adore them 80% of the time when there’s no tantrums etc.

‘But despite loving them, I feel deeply full of regret at ever having children. I miss my “old life” so, so, so much, I miss the freedom of just every single thing that comes without having children.

‘I miss my husband and how we used to be/how our relationship was then. I miss lazy weekends, not having to get up. And the travel I used to do… this is probably the biggest thing.

‘Yes I know I can still do things, and we do. But I mean that I miss the freedom and luxury of not having to think all the details/about everyone else. Everything is so much more of an effort, and I just basically really wish I’d stayed without children.

‘I don’t feel that parenting is particularly ‘rewarding’ even when they do something pretty amazing. It’s cute but I don’t get any joy from it per se.

‘Probably one of the only things in life that you genuinely can’t change once it’s happened.

‘I don’t want people of offer ‘fixes’ on how I can do this or that. I guess I just wanted a safe space to voice my feelings because I can’t really say this out loud in real life.

The Chelsea Handler Childless Woman Upset: Other Conservatives Wrongly Conflating Married Motherhood with Womanhood or Happiness, Meaning, Purpose

The Chelsea Handler Childless Woman Upset: Other Conservatives Wrongly Conflating Married Motherhood with Womanhood or with Happiness, Meaning, or Purpose

After entertainer Chelsea Handler uploaded (Link): a Tweet with a video of herself listing the numerous ways she enjoys life due to being childless – I didn’t see anything in the video mentioning abortion – a lot of other conservatives jumped to shame and scold Handler for being happy about being childless and publicly expressing that happiness.

Others have said that Handler had two or three abortions in the past. The fact that Handler previously had abortions does not change the substance of my problems with conservative reaction to Handler’s video.

I am pro-life, not pro-choice, so I don’t agree with Handler’s actions to terminate her pregnancies.

However, again, I don’t recall Handler’s “happy to be childless” video advocating abortion or mentioning anything about abortion.

I don’t think her video criticized or shamed women for being mothers or for wanting to be mothers.

The only possible, even remotely “anti motherhood” take away one can get from her video is that mothers – assuming they are good, non-abusive mothers – invest a lot of time in child-rearing, but Handler doesn’t frame it in an anti-motherhood way.

It’s Okay For Women to Be Childless at Any Age and to be Happy About Being Childless, Just Like It’s Okay For Mothers to Be Happy About Being Mothers

Handler was just showing ways she has more free time because she doesn’t have to participate in childcare – which is not the same thing as being “anti-motherhood,” or telling other women they are wrong to be mothers.

It’s perfectly fine for a woman to be single and childless and to be happy about it.

Women can and should find meaning and purpose apart from marriage and motherhood. It’s unhealthy for any person to wrap up all their happiness, meaning, or purpose into one identity, station of life, or role.

If you are a married mother, your children will grow up, move out, and seldom visit you once they’re gone. Your husband may develop dementia, abuse you, or cheat on you, so that you will be without emotional support or you will have to divorce him.
In all these situations, you will be left with yourself, by yourself, and god help you if you never forged purpose, identity, happiness, or meaning apart from a spouse and children.

There’s no reason to criticize or shame an adult, man or woman, for being single and childless and for being happy about it and posting about it.

My fellow conservatives often push motherhood (via podcasts, tweets, magazine articles, church sermons, blog posts, etc) to a loopy, creepy, fevered pitch, about how super awesome, fulfilling, and wonderful motherhood supposedly is – but goodness forbid a childless woman lists or publicizes the ways she’s happy with being childless – and do so without criticizing motherhood or mothers. That’s a huge double standard.

I also didn’t agree with Handler’s mockery of single women who choose to remain virgins until marriage or to remain chaste (I blogged about that (Link): here a few years ago).

Unfortunately, in the midst of criticizing Handler, a lot of conservatives today were conflating “womanhood” to married motherhood. 

However, a woman remains a woman regardless if she has a child or is infertile, childless, or childfree, or whether she wants to have children or not.

The Bizarre, Misguided Shaming of Single and Childless or Childfree Women by Pro-Lifer Abby Johnson – (Not All Single, Childless Women are Liberal, Pro-Choice Feminists)

The Bizarre, Misguided Shaming of Single and Childless or Childfree Women by Pro-Lifer Abby Johnson – (Not All Single, Childless Women are Liberal, Pro-Choice Feminists)

When I was on Twitter the other day, someone who I follow on Twitter commented on a Tweet by a lady calling herself Abby Johnson.

A reminder: I sometimes follow people on social media who I don’t fully agree with on all topics. I’m a conservative, but I follow some liberals and progressives, including women who call themselves “radical feminists.” A lot of those radical feminists are pro-choice; they support abortion, I do not.

Like me, most of those radical feminists do not support “sex work” (strip clubs, prostitution, etc), and they do not support transgender activism.

Here is how Abby Johnson is currently describing herself on her Twitter bio (@AbbyJohnson):

Planned Parenthood Director turned Pro-Life Advocate! CEO of @ATTWNministry
. Global Ambassador for @COL1972official
. Best selling author & speaker. Mama/Wife
— end Twitter bio —

I am sincerely glad to hear that Johnson flipped her opinion on abortion, that she went from being pro-choice to pro-life.

Johnson seems a bit familiar. I think I may have seen her interviewed on Christian television program “The 700 Club,” in one of their CBN news segments, or perhaps I saw her on Fox News at some point?

At any rate, I am dismayed by her Twitter feed. Unfortunately, she, like many of my other fellow conservatives, falsely equates motherhood and wifehood with womanhood. I corrected her on that under a few of her other tweets.

(I’m not sure if Johnson is a Christian or not, but from her tweets, I can see that she leans right – as I do – and she also is pro-life, does not support transgenderism. I too am pro-life, and I sure as heck do not support progressive transgenderism, ie, allowing biological men who say they are women into women’s prisons, women’s locker rooms and so forth).

Also like a lot of other conservatives, Johnson holds a lot of false stereotypes about secular, liberal feminists. Not all feminists support trans activism, are anti-men, anti-nuclear family, and so on. There are actually women feminists who are married mothers.

If you’ve followed my blog, you will already know that I am middle-aged, I am single by circumstance (not by choice – not that men or women who choose to be single should be criticized for that, either), I am a conservative, I am anti-progressive trans agenda, and I am pro-life.

I am not opposed to The Nuclear Family, parenthood, and marriage, but I am opposed to the deification of such by other conservatives.

(Yes, most conservatives have unfortunately turned “the family,” motherhood, fatherhood, and marriage into idols, and they frequently love to make negative assumptions about, and insult anyone, who isn’t married or who doesn’t have children).

Let’s look at some of Johnson’s tweets – here’s the first one that I saw the other day, because someone I followed on Twitter commented below it (link to her tweet):

So, what does Johnson do with conservative, pro-life, anti- leftist transgender activism, middle-aged never married women such as myself, who was a devout Christian for decades, who had expected to get married, never met the right guy, remained faithful to biblical sexual ethics – no sex outside of marriage, hence no pregnancies?

Why is Johnson lumping pro-life, conservative, single, childless women, such as myself, into the same group with progressive, pro-choice, pro-progressive- gender- ideology women? Which is what she’s doing, because she’s equating being a woman, and/or a decent, happy woman, with being married and a mother.

Johnson is unnecessarily insulting other pro-life, conservative women who never did marry, who may never marry, and who do not have children, and she’s doing this to score a few points against what she terms “radical feminists,” who she (like many of my other fellow conservatives) wrongly assume, are all man-hating, baby-hating, single women who are lonely, miserable Cat Ladies.

(The Cat Lady trope is very sexist and needs to die off already. I usually see men tossing this at women. It feels a little more gross to see a woman tossing this sexist stand-by at other women to insult them with.)

In trying to score points against radical feminists, many of whom are actually married with children (and possibly cats) of their own, Johnson creates collateral damage.

Meaning…
Not all conservative, anti-trans agenda, pro-life women are married, can get married, or want to get married. Not all conservative, anti-trans agenda, pro-life women have children, can have children, or want to have children.

Why is Abby Johnson throwing such conservative women under the bus? To get some cheap shots in at liberal, feminist, pro-choice women?

I’m a conservative, and while I do not agree with feminists (radical or otherwise) on every issue, I am not okay with Johnson (or other conservatives) shaming or insulting liberal or pro-choice women over their marital or parenting status, or that of mine or that of other conservative women.

I cannot imagine how Johnson hopes to change any pro-choice minds by carrying on like she is?

Dear Abby: “My Kids Never Call or Visit Me” – Your Adult Children Do Not Owe You Friendship and Won’t Visit You When You Are Elderly: Readjust Your Expectations, Parents

Dear Abby: “My Kids Never Call or Visit Me” – Your Adult Children Do Not Owe You Friendship and Won’t Visit You When You Are Elderly: Readjust Your Expectations, Parents

If you’re a childfree person, you know you’ve heard pro-parenthood people, usually parents themselves, ask a million times, “But who is going to take care of you when you get older?”

From what I’ve heard of people who work in nursing homes, the adult children of elderly people in nursing homes seldom to never go to visit them.

When I used to periodically visit my grandmother in a nursing home, as myself and other family would be sitting in the lobby waiting for a nurse to wheel my grandmother out to visit, other seniors would wheel up to myself or one of my aunts and start to cry.

These seniors would cry (I mean literally cry, with tears running down their faces), and they’d say, “I don’t like it here, I want to go home.”

The vibe is that these elderly people hated being in the nursing home (which is understandable; I felt so bad for these people), but they were apparently not getting many visits (if any at all) from their family members.

When one of my Aunts got into her 80s (by that time, her spouse had been dead for around ten or more years), she was living alone, her memory was going – she eventually had to move in with one of her adult sons.

But prior to that, for years and years, that Aunt was on her own. She’d phone my Dad (her brother in law) any time she needed help.

My Dad ended up doing things like driving that particular Aunt of mine to the hospital at 2:00 in the morning when she fell and broke a rib. She called him and asked him for help with that.

My Dad went to her home on another occasion to fix a leaking toilet. My Dad also mowed her lawn for her a few times.

My Aunt’s own own adult son, who lived much closer to her than my father did, was not stepping up to the plate. He only came into the picture when there was no other choice.

His Mom (my Aunt) eventually got fairly bad dementia, or whatever problem (her recall became terrible) – she also became more and more physically frail, and it became glaringly obvious she could no longer live alone.

Only then did the adult son step up and let her live in his house, something he should’ve done years prior.

Before that, my Dad, who was up there in age himself, was driving to her house, which was like a 40 minute commute each way, to run errands for her, drive her to doctor’s appointments, etc, whenever she’d phone for help.

In reading up on books and web pages on abuse and codependency, I kept seeing one boundary violation by parents who have this bogus expectation that their adult children owe them friendship – to keep them occupied when they’re lonely.

This is doubly true if the parent in question is widowed (the other spouse died), or if they’re in a lonely, loveless marriage.

These types of parents (usually the mother) actually expects that their adult children (usually a daughter) to wait on them hand and foot, eat lunch with them daily, to phone them daily to chit chat – to be their buddy, their confidant and their pal to keep loneliness at bay.

And that is not a fair or reasonable expectation for a parent to have. Psychologists write about this in their books, it’s not merely me informing you of this.

I also read an entire book about emotional incest by a psychologist, and, according to this book, a lot of parents actually begin looking to a young child of theirs to meet their emotional needs and their need for companionship and/or identity or purpose when their kid is a baby, toddler, pre-teen, or teen!

This sort of thing does not always start in the kid’s adulthood, in other words. For some kids, it begins when they’re a baby or small child.

If the parent leans on the child in that manner, according to the psychologist who treats the now-adult patients who were leaned on by a parent when they were a kid, it will create all sorts of problems for the child when he or she grows up.

If you’re a parent, you need to realize that it’s not your child’s responsibility or duty to provide you with companionship, regardless of your child’s age.

If you are lonely or bored, you need to get out of the house and make friends with people YOUR OWN AGE.

You should never, ever rely on a child of yours (whatever their age) to meet your need for friendship, nor should you share personal details with them, like divorce stress, or whatever.

Your child is not your mini-therapist at any age. Talk to an adult friend about your adult problems. Making friends as an adult is not easy, but you will be messing up your kid if you start sharing “adult” details and problems with them, especially if they are young.

Anyway, having children is NOT a guarantee that the children will regularly stay in touch with you as you age.

(Link): Dear Abby: My Kids Never Call or Visit Me

by Dear Abby
January 29, 2023

DEAR ABBY:
I am an active widower with five grown children. Although three of them live in the same city and two live in a city nearby, I haven’t heard from or seen them as often over the past few years as I would like.

I realized recently that I miss their company and I’d like them to call or see me more often.

Writers at WND and Real Clear Wire Sound Like They’re Freaking Out Over Increasing Numbers of Single Women Who Aren’t Marrying or Having Children

Writers at WND and Real Clear Wire Sound Like They’re Freaking Out Over Increasing Numbers of Single Women Who Aren’t Marrying or Having Children

I saw this headline go through my Twitter feed earlier (this is how the writers at WND chose to word their headline – WND says this article at their site originally appeared at another site called “Real Clear Wire”):

“Single women could push U.S. into ‘demographic decline’ like in Japan”

It’s hard for me to say if the writers at WND are stating that “matter of factly,” but at first glance (and realizing they’re conservatives, with many of my fellow conservatives being very grossly obsessed about promoting marriage and the nuclear family), it sounds as though it’s blaming and criticizing women for being single and for choosing not to reproduce.

As a conservative woman myself, who’s never married or had children, I abhor both liberals (or progressives) AND conservatives shaming or criticizing people (women especially) over whether to marry or have children or not.

Both sides need to back off. Allow women to decide for themselves if they’d like to marry and/or have children.

Men seldom get as much pressure, shaming, criticism, and guilt tripping to marry and have children as women do – and it’s sexist.

Women do not exist merely to marry and have kids and assist a man (husband) make HIS goals and dreams come to pass.

Most of the article itself at WND isn’t too bad – it seems to be straight up reporting. I only spotted two or three possible subtle, sexist digs at single women.

In the past week, I’ve seen two or three other headlines from other sources, such as The Daily Mail, go through my feed about how there are more and more single women in the USA now (including large numbers of never married women), and how a lot of these women tend to vote Democrat.

I am always alarmed when such news stories and surveys are released, because unfortunately, every time such studies or stories are published, the sexist asshole conservative and Republican men (and conservative / Republican women who are traitors to their own biological sex as a group) become aware of such news reports, and they immediately begin tweeting and blogging their revolting, sexist, anti-single-women propaganda, and their “women shouldn’t have the right to vote” garbage.

Many of these conservatives, when they begin catching wind of whatever recent news reportage of women staying single and childless, begin their face-palming, vomit-worthy lamentations about how America in 2023 isn’t the same as good old 1952 America, where every woman got married by age 23 and had five children.

Many such conservative-penned tweets and articles, and Tucker Carlson on his nightly FOX news show, will demonize single women for being single, will attempt to make marriage look like nirvana (never mind that a lot of husbands cheat on their wives or murder them), and in yet others, these authors or cable news commentators attempt to lecture, scold, or shame single women into marrying immediately and popping out ten kids, whether these women want to or not, and whether or not these women even know many single men they can date.

I could go on for ten more pages about why such utterly predictable material is disgusting and sexist, but one thing I wanted to point out is that these excessively pro-marriage idiot conservatives never factor in is that getting married is not easy.

I myself had wanted to be married, and in spite of having friends fix me up on dates, in spite of going to singles classes at churches, in spite of joining dating sites, I couldn’t find a compatible mate.

Even if a single woman wants to get married, it’s no easy task to find a decent, compatible guy.

So, if you’re a conservative, unless you’re willing to actually help marriage-desiring single women to get married, to fix them up on dates with decent single guys you know, or to get your local church to host more singles mixers and so forth so these singles can meet and marry, shut up with browbeating single women to get married.

A single woman cannot wave a magic wand and make a husband magically appear before her – it involves going out on dates with various men, and that is no guarantee of finding a suitable marital partner.

Some of those men women go on dates with or see on dating sites may be perverts, controlling, immature, selfish, or personality disordered -in other words, none of those types of men are marriage material.

Shaming and hounding single women to get married does nothing to actually HELP a single woman run into and marry an eligible single man. So shut up, conservatives, shut up about scolding women for not marrying.

I find that conservatives generally ignore single women. But this comes in cycles.

Conservatives will annoyingly ignore single, childless women and their concerns unless and until

• another new study appears discussing how more and more women are staying single and childless which may impact future demographics, or,
• until a major election cycle where a Republican loses to a Democrat, because, it’s found, single, childless women as a bloc voted for the Democrat, helping the Republican to lose.

Then, all the sudden, only in these very limited contexts, will these anti-singles idiot conservatives and Republicans start frothing at the mouth and pearl clutching and writing their singles-shaming editorials and tweets that are chock full of sexism about “why aren’t women marrying and making babies any more.” The rest of the time, we single and childless women do not exist on their radars.

Hey, fellow conservatives:
Why don’t you pro-marriage, pro-motherhood, pro-nuclear family assholes start investing into single and childless women at all times, not just when your favorite Republican loses an election? Start reaching single, childless women where they are and start offering them incentives to vote Republican.

(Link):  Single women could push U.S. into ‘demographic decline’ like in Japan

Excerpts:

‘One of the great untold stories of American politics’

By WND News Services
Published January 21, 2023

[Editor’s note: This story originally was published by Real Clear Wire.]

By Joel Kotkin & Samuel J. Abrams

Soccer Moms are giving way to Single Woke Females – the new “SWFs” – as one of the most potent voting blocs in American politics.

Unmarried women without children have been moving toward the Democratic Party for several years, but the 2022 midterms may have been their electoral coming-out party as they proved the chief break on the predicted Republican wave. While married men and women as well as unmarried men broke for the GOP, CNN exit polls found that 68% of unmarried women voted for Democrats.

The Supreme Court’s August decision overturning Roe v. Wade was certainly a special factor in the midterms, but longer-term trends show that single, childless women are joining African Americans as the Democrats’ most reliable supporters.

Their power is growing thanks to the demographic winds.

The (Link): number of never married women has grown from about 20% in 1950 to over 30% in 2022, while the percentage of married women has declined from almost 70% in 1950 to under 50% today.

Overall, the percentage of (Link): married households with children has declined from 37% in 1976 to 21% today.

A (Link): new Institute for Family Studies analysis  of 2020 Census data found that one in six women do not have children by the time they reach the end of their childbearing years, up from one in ten in 1990.

Single adult women now total some (Link): 42 million, comparable to the key African American voting bloc (46 million), while vastly larger than key groups like labor union members (14 million) or college students (20 million).

‘I Couldn’t Have Children Because My Mother and Father Were Brother and Sister’ by T. Weiler

‘I Couldn’t Have Children Because My Mother and Father Were Brother and Sister’ by T. Weiler

All that crap my fellow conservatives keep pumping out about marriage, parenthood, natalism, and The Nuclear Family keeps getting shown to be false over and over.

Marriage, parenthood, and the Nuclear Family don’t fix societal ills or make people more ethical, godly, or mature.

And I hate to say this as a conservative, but I’ve no doubt that most other conservatives (the ones who are abnormally fixated on Parenthood, Marriage, and The Nuclear Family) would wrongly assume that the reason this woman never had children is because she’s a man-hating feminist who put career before marriage.

It never occurs to such simplistic, dip shit conservatives that some of us – including conservative women such as myself! – that we couldn’t find the right guy to marry, or, maybe we’re infertile. There are many ways a person can end up single and/or childless into their 40s and beyond, and deliberately picking career over marriage is only one but many.

(Link): My mother was 16 when I was born, my father just 14. More shockingly, they were BROTHER AND SISTER… but despite being the product of incest I’m NOT tainted goods

Excerpts:

by Teresa Weiler
Dec 2, 2022

Making new friends when you’re in your mid-60s tends to follow the same pattern. Proud grandmas share photos of their grandchildren, stories of babysitting dramas and details of soon-to-be new additions.

So, at 64, I brace myself for the question I’m inevitably asked: ‘Teresa, do you have grandchildren yet?’

Pinning on my brightest smile I simply answer: ‘I’m afraid not. I would have loved a family but I just never met the right man.’

After years of being asked about my family status — first about children, now about grandchildren — you’d think I’d be used to it.

But while I’ve been giving the same platitudes for so long they trip off the tongue, the truth is, the pain I experienced aching for a baby is every bit as intense now as I accept I will never have grandchildren either.

Yet there’s no way I can share the real reason it never happened — that my family background is so tainted, I was terrified I would breed monsters.

My mother was 16 when I was born, my father just 14. More shocking still, they were brother and sister.

I’m Child-Free by Choice So No, I Don’t Want to Look After Your Kids by Jana Hocking

I’m Child-Free by Choice So No, I Don’t Want to Look After Your Kids by Jana Hocking

This is interesting… it’s (the essay below, via New York Post) presented from a secular vantage, so I’m not sure what the religious beliefs are here, or if everyone discussed is an atheist or what, but I can tell you as a former Southern Baptist, former evangelical Christian, that most Christians exploit single, childless adults and assume that all single, childless adults ADORE children, are only good for free babysitting services. And that is all false.

While I am pro-life on abortion (I don’t support abortion), I do NOT enjoy being around babies, toddlers, and little kids and have no interest in babysitting them.

The false, condescending idea that all single, childless adults should babysit the children of married couples for free at any and all times and LOVE doing it!!, is very, very common among Baptist and Protestant Christians (I’ve never been Roman Catholic, so I cannot speak to that).

But often in their sermons, podcasts, books, or literature about singleness (if and when the Christian idiots bother to address adult singleness at all, because they usually ignore the topic),
they always advise single adults (especially women) that they should help their “married with children” couples in their lives (especially in their churches) by babysitting their children for free. How obnoxious.

But it’s a very common theme that turns up in Christian thinking.

Years ago, I did a blog post here about a totally obnoxious, hideous post published in “Christianity Today” magazine by a married-with-kids woman who started the editorial out nicely enough, when she talked about how churches treat single, childless adults like trash (yes, they do), but then that wonderful opening transitioned into a vomitous, disgusting explanation at how churches should value single, childless adults for all the free babysitting they can provide nuclear families.

Seriously.

Just when I thought I had found a wonderful essay uplifting and affirming single, childless adults, and acknowledging how horribly Christian culture mistreats single, childless adults, married bitch has to go and ruin the essay by making it into another gross, “single adults are only good and useful for the services they can provide to married parents, like babysit my kids for free, since I’m a mother to toddlers, I have no immediate family near me, and the parenting leaves me exhausted all day!” spiel.

This below sounds like the secular version of that.

And it’s so wrong. Damn it all, am I ever sick and tired of married- with- kids couples acting as though their single, childless friends have life so much easier then they do and that these single adult friends “owe” babysitting services to them. It pisses me off to no end. And I’m also effing sick of Christian culture for upholding this same singles-exploiting crap in their books, tweets, You Tube videos, sermons, etc.

(Link): I’m child-free by choice so no, I don’t want to look after your kids by Jana Hocking

By Jana Hocking, News.com.au (in New York Post)
Oct 13, 2022

Look, there’s no polite way to put this: Dear people with kids, look after your own damn children!

There, I said it.

This fury has been quietly raging in me for a couple of years now. It started when a few of my girlfriends started coupling off.

Sure, I’ve managed to come to peace with the fact that once my friends find their special person, I’m probably not going to see them for a couple of months. At least until they’ve come out of that honeymoon period.

I’ve never complained, because I’ve secretly hoped they would understand when I too, went through that phase. It’s exciting, and lusty and totally worth dumping your friends for a few months of lovey dovey ridiculousness.

But then something happens once they start having kids.

We singletons become less friends, and more servants to you and your children. Think I’m being extreme? I’m really not!

Woman Who Unpopularly Decided To Never Have Children Reflects On It Now That She’s 85 Years Old

Woman Who Unpopularly Decided To Never Have Children Reflects On It Now That She’s 85 Years Old

I was never really for or against having children myself – had I married younger, I was entertaining the idea of having at least one kid, if I could’ve done so by the age of 35.

One of the things this 85 year old woman says is something that I deduced years ago: it’s a huge mistake for any woman to base most or all of her purpose and identity in parenthood or marriage (same is true for men).

If you build most to all of your identity and purpose upon being a spouse or parent, what do you do if you or your spouse are infertile, if you have an only child and he dies young, or if your spouse is abusive so that you have to divorce him (or her), or your spouse gets into a car wreck, gets cancer, or has a heart attack and dies? Or, what happens if your spouse develops dementia, which, in a manner of speaking, kind of leaves you alone?

What happens when your children grow up and move out, leaving you alone with just your spouse?

Actually, what I’m saying here is true of anyone – if you’re a Codependent, never married, childless person, you have the tendency to lose yourself in the problems and lives of your friends, co-workers, and family members. That will end up being a waste of your time or being a mistake as well.

(Link): Woman Who Unpopularly Decided To Never Have Children Reflects On It Now That She’s 85 Years Old

Even though an astonishing number of people don’t feel, and have never felt, the urge to become a parent, the pressure to have kids is still tremendous.

Any person who has made this profound decision about leading a child-free life can tell you it’s usually met in two different ways. One, people mutter a series of condescending phrases such as “oh” or “you’ll change your mind”.

Two, they actually take you seriously and instantly warn you that you’ll be lonely and regret it when you’re old.

Speaking of the latter scenario, one open letter on the ‘Childfree’ subreddit put this notion to bed once and for all.

An 85-year-old widow addressed the young people of this community, shared her experience, and proudly stated that she has zero regrets about her choice. Being married for 50 years, she offered her perspective and some validating words of wisdom.

“If I could go back in time, would I do it again? (being childfree), 100% yes. I would live the same life one thousand times,” the woman wrote. Her story sparked a discussion in the comments below, with responses ranging from kudos to appreciation. Scroll down to read the story in full and the reactions that followed.

For some reason, people who decide to lead a childfree life often hear they’ll regret it once they’re old and alone

So when this 85-year-old widow shared an open letter about her childfree experience, people felt incredibly validated

Letter from an 85 year old widow: My childfree experience and a few humble opinions

Dear Young People

I wonder if I am the oldest person to post on this forum? It was a young lady who told me about this forum and I have read many of your posts and comments for a few weeks. Many have made me smile. Some have made me wince.

It appears to me, many of you on here to validate your life changing decision.

Finding people similar to you is important and I understand the needs. So can I just say, from my experience, your decision is a good one? And if you want to know why I think that, please give me 5 minutes of your time.

I was married for just over 50 years. We bucked the norm and did not want kids. In those days we said “we are trying” for a few years than “we cannot have kids,” case closed. It was our personal secret. It was nobody’s business.

If we were honest and said “we cannot have kids, because we just don’t want them” the fallout with family and friends would have been tough for us.

Our 50 years in a nutshell was perfect. Good jobs, no money worries, followed our own interests and hobbies.

Had many friends and many lovely nieces and nephews. If I could go back in time, would I do it again? (being childfree), 100% yes. I would live the same life one thousand times.