Married Preacher, Father of Eight Kids, Used Nanny as Sex Object – update on Phillips story

Married Preacher, Father of Eight Kids, Used Nanny as Sex Object – update on Phillips story
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WARNING. Post ahead contains some sexy scenarios, some adult material, if you will.
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I have written of this story before – twice. Here’s yet another update on the Phillips saga.

Most Christians don’t support folks like me, who have stayed virgins into our 40s or older – I’ve never been married, but had wanted to be – but instead, Christians preach repeatedly on the importance of marriage and having children. They claim to defend and revere “family values.”

Christians pay attention to marriage, married couples, and children and parenting all the time, but do little for or about older singles.

I’m treated like persona non grata, or like a leper, depending on which denomination we’re considering, for being a childless, never married, 40 something virginal woman.

But these guys who work as preachers who espouse the “nuclear family” ideal, who are married, some are fathers, get caught in affairs all the time. They are such flaming hypocrites it makes me want to form a fist and punch a hole in the wall.

Instead of Christians harboring the unfair stereotype that never married men past age 30 are child molestors, given the staggering amount of news items I keep seeing of MARRIED CHRISTIAN MEN (see this link for examples) who are using prostitutes, having affairs, molesting kids, and acting inappropriate towards young women, I think the stereotype needs to be dropped.

It’s much more accurate for Christians to suspect married men of sexual sin than un-married ones.

We have an update on another married preacher, a marriage- and- family idolater, Doug Phillips, who apparently cheated on his wife, which you can read at (Link): Spiritual Sounding Board
– under the “Lourdes Torres, Alleged Victim in the Doug Phillips (Vision Forum) Sex Abuse Scandals Files Lawsuit” post which was published April 15, 2013

And here:
(Link): Lawsuit claims S.A. religious leader preyed on his kids’ nanny

And here:
(Link): Sex Scandal Rocks The Duggars’ Christian Patriarchy Movement

    The far-right Christian Patriarchy—brought to American audiences by the Duggar family—is on the verge of collapse after a series of alleged sex scandals involving the movement’s leaders.

And here:

(Link): Pastor accused of ‘using nanny [Lourdes Torres] as sex object’, from WND

This has nothing to do with anything, but in some of the photos, particularly the “red dress” photo, Torres looks like British R&B singer Amy Winehouse.
Compare (Link): Torres’ Photo with (Link): Amy Winehouse photos and tell me if they don’t look like they could be sisters. Anyway…..

Excerpts from WND article:

    April 2014

    Lawsuit claims religious leader promised to marry young woman after wife dies

    by CHELSEA SCHILLING

    (Warning: This story contains explicit descriptions of alleged sexual conduct described in a lawsuit and may be offensive to some readers.)

    The former leader of a popular Christian ministry – who resigned from his position after confessing to an “inappropriate” relationship – is now the subject of a lawsuit that claims he “methodically groomed” and made unwanted sexual contact with a young woman after serving as an authority figure in her life for more than a decade.

    Doug Phillips, a husband and father of eight children, had been a popular and controversial figure in the homeschooling movement and a leading advocate of “biblical patriarchy” before his resignation from Vision Forum Ministries and Boerne Christian Assembly, a Baptist church outside San Antonio, Texas, at which he had served as an elder and preached hundreds of sermons.

    … According to the teachings of the patriarchy movement, also known as the stay-at-home daughters or quiverfull movement, young women remain at home under the protection of their fathers.

    They’re generally expected not to work outside their home or go to college, and they’re taught to abide by strict gender roles in which men have authority over women.

    ‘A personal sex object’

    In the complaint filed in Kendall County District Court in Texas Tuesday morning, Phillips is accused of using a woman named Lourdes Torres, now 29, as “a personal sex object” over a period of five years.

    … Torres said she met Phillips and his wife, Beall, at a homeschooling conference in November 1999 when Torres was 15 years old.

    Torres spent many hours in the Phillips home, cared for their children and helped run the family farm. She was invited on trips with the family to Hawaii, Virginia, Mexico, Florida and other states.

    Adulterer and Nuclear Family Idolater Doug Phillips Product: "Family Strategies" DVD Series
    (click the image to enlrage it) Adulterer and Nuclear Family Idolater Doug Phillips Product: “Family Strategies” DVD Series – The subtitle reads, “How to Build A Healthy Family Culture in Your Home” -I see. how does that fit a 50 something year old man hitting on a teen aged girl repeatedly?

    By 2007, according to the complaint, Phillips began “to pay special attention” to Torres, complementing her beauty and devotion to his family, giving her money, touching her, asking her personal questions about her thoughts and life plans and telling her he would take care of her.

    By October of that year, the lawsuit states, Phillips invited Torres’ family to live with him as they were moving into a new home: “Phillips entered [Torres’] bedroom and without her consent began touching her breasts, stomach, back, neck, and waist.” Torres alleges she began to cry and ask Phillips to stop as he rubbed his genitals on her and “masturbated and ejaculated on her.” She claims the behavior continued, and Phillips told her he loved her and intended to marry her and “blatantly disregarded her requests” that he stop.

    “Douglas Phillips, on the evenings he visited Ms. Torres, persuaded her that he was not doing anything wrong, that he intended to marry Ms. Torres, and that his wife would die shortly and enable him to marry Ms. Torres,” the complaint states. “He further repeatedly told Ms. Torres that he loved her, that he would take care of her, and that what they were doing was not wrong. He also stated that if it was wrong, it was completely her fault.”

    Continue reading “Married Preacher, Father of Eight Kids, Used Nanny as Sex Object – update on Phillips story”

Married Christian Woman Sexually Preys on Kids At Phillips’ Family-Worshipping Church – Married People Not More Godly Than Singles – Married Sex Must Not Be As Hot As Christians Teach

Married Christian Woman Sexually Preys on Kids At Phillips’ Family-Worshipping Church – Married People Not More Godly Than Singles – Married Sex Must Not Be As Hot As Christians Teach

Before I get to the main point of this post:

To refresh your memory:

One blog page says that some middle aged (or she might be in her 30s, but I think she’s a bit older?) woman at Phillips’ church was running about hitting on and sleeping with under-aged males in the church, and Phillips did nothing about it.

As I have said numerous times on this blog, and although some Christians do not like to admit this (some have denied this when I talk to them on other blogs), there are indeed stigmas adult singles face from and by the Christian community, such as:

All of us single adults are thought by married Christians to be hussies who hump ten men a day. Never mind some Christian women are virgins at age 40+, no, we are still suspected of being female horn dogs who will hump a married man in a heartbeat.

We are also subjected to the notion in evangelical and fundamentalist Christianity, Southern Baptist thinking, and some Neo-Reformed thinking, that married people with children are more godly, above sexual temptation, holier, and more responsible, than never married/ divorced childless Christians.

Also, according to Christians, if one waits until marriage to have sex, the sex will be regular and great. If married sex is so great and peachy, why did this married Christian woman have sex with so many teen boys and such at her church?

So is it not eye-opening to see married Christian women who get caught doing things such as described in this post (it discusses a married Christian woman who had sexual affairs with one teen boy, and who hit on numerous teen boys and perhaps a few 20-somethings at her church, and there were possibly a few adult on adult extra marital affairs going on as well, and the church’s preacher did nothing to halt any of this despite numerous pleas from church members):

(Link): Yet Another Doug Phillips Sex Scandal

It is a very long post, but I encourage you to click the link and read the page, or at least skim. I will only excerpt a paragraph or three:

Update: Family Worshiping Cult Leader – Doug Phillips – Admits to Physical Affair / And Christian Skeptics Who Deny that Churches and Christians Harbor Stereotypes Against Unmarried Women (and Men)

Update: Family Worshiping Cult Leader – Doug Phillips – Admits to Physical Affair / And Christian Skeptics Who Deny that Churches and Christians Harbor Stereotypes Against Unmarried Women (and Men)

This is an update to my previous post,
(Link): Leader of Hyper Family Focused, Fertility Cult (Vision Forum Ministries) Steps Down After Admitting to Having an “Emotional Affair”

Another update (April 2014):
(Link): Married Preacher, Father of Eight Kids (and promoter of “Family Values” and Leader of wacko Quiverfull- and- Patriarchy type groups that promotes idolatry of “the family” and Marriage and of Having Lots of Children), Used Nanny as Sex Object – update on Phillips story

Phillips admits there was a physical aspect to the affair (see link below).

Yes, married people commit sexual sin. That should not be a revelation to most people, but to some Christians, it is.

Sexual sin is not, contrary to most Christian views on these topics (sometimes it goes unspoken), only something that happens to or among singles.

Amazingly, I have come across Christians on other blogs in the last few months who actually deny that there is a stereotype that adult Christian singles are sexually promiscuous, or more apt to sexually sin than married couples, or that single women are perceived as being threats to married women, but yes, these stereotypes very much exist. I do not make this stuff up.

Because these doubters themselves have not experienced this prejudice, or have not seen it happen to other people with their own two eyes, they doubt me.

I’ve run into one or two catty married Christian women on those same blogs (I’ve discussed this before, dig through the archives of this blog to see those posts) who sit there – and they are quite rude to me about it – who justify and rationalize their horrible treatment of, and attitudes toward, unmarried women.

These married women should feel guilty and ashamed by their prejudices against unmarried women, but they tend to justify why they feel just fine acting as though any unmarried women they meet wants to bed their husband.

These Christian married women rationalize and spin why they feel single women should be isolated and kept away from married couples. They are bigoted against single women and are proud of it.

I relish the day their husbands drop dead (men usually die before women), and they find themselves widows who then gets subjected to the very treatment that they give to me and other single women.

Let’s see how these types of prejudiced married women like it if their husband dies next week, and they are then treated like potential man-snatching harlots, so all their married friends start avoiding them, or clutch their husband’s arm even tighter when the now-widowed woman steps forward to greet the couple.

Let’s see how they enjoy being treated suspiciously, like a home wrecking slut, even though they’ve not done anything wrong.

I have documented these very stereotypes here on this site before from various sources, and I have been subjected to it personally, and I have read other singles talk about it on other sites.

I am tiffed that there are Christians running around on other forums or blogs saying, “But I’ve never encountered this attitude or stereotype you speak of!”

Honey, just because it’s not happened directly to you or right before your eyes, does not mean it doesn’t happen. Jeeze.

One indirect piece of evidence that this stereotype exists and that I am not making it up is that Christian singles who write articles and books about common challenges to being single discuss it, and Christian married preachers who minister to singles have to sometimes address these biases in their churches, and in their books or blogs about singles, because they see adult singles being marginalized and ostracized and facing discrimination by married couples in churches due to these stigmas.

Some churches will not hire unmarried men for teaching or preaching positions, one reason being because they assume all unmarried people are randy, sex-starved animals who will mount any other person in the vicinity if given half a chance and begin humping them immediately.

So, you have single preachers writing against this situation, and the ones who were single and now married discuss it in their books and blogs, and they explain that these very attitudes are driving single adults away from churches.

One reason some evangelicals have begun pushing “early marriage” within the last five years (and I’ve blogged about early marriage before, please check the blog archives) is precisely because they assume any and all adults over age 18 or 25 are having sex, or will have sex, because supposedly, no adult can withstand sexual urges or temptations (even though, yes, they very well can; I am proof of that, and I have a normal libido, I am not “anti sex,” “frigid,” did not lack the opportunity for sex, or whatever).

There is most certainly a perception among evangelicals, fundamentalists, Neo Reformed, and Baptists, that no human being can wait for sex longer than three minutes, so these sorts of bloggers and preachers have been telling kids to marry by the time they are 18, 21, or 25 years old, because if they do not marry young, the assumption is these kids will turn into that stereotypical Christian unmarried person who has sex every five minutes with married men and every one else.

Regarding the update about the married, nuclear- family-worshipping cult guy who is also a father (Doug Phillips), who admits to having an affair:

From the way Phillips worded his misdeeds, he may not have had standard penis in the vagina intercourse (which most Christians would consider “the biblical sense of knowing someone,” and which is the phrase he uses to deny the extent of what he did), but the way he words things could refer to anything from heavy petting, to French kissing, to anal sex, to oral sex by one or both people, or who knows what.

I am really disgusted and tired of most of conservative Christianity worshipping marriage and the nuclear family, but offering no support for any unmarried adult past age 25 or older, especially the ones who are still virgins or who are trying to stay celibate.

These same nuclear- family idolizers lecture the teens and college students to stay virgins until marriage, they say they view the “family as the backbone of society,” but they themselves are out having affairs, or visiting prostitutes, or viewing porn on the internet – and in effect, ruining their own families with their sexual sins and betrayals.

So, do they really and truly value marriage and family? Nah, I don’t think so.

But they have the nerve to lecture the rest of us for not being married, or just assume we’re all out being promiscuous, as they are doing.

And, this brings to mind the fact that while conservative Christians tell young people that if they stay a virgin until marriage, the sex they get will be frequent and “mind blowing.” If that were true, we would not be so apt to see all these stories of Christian guys, some preachers, who get caught having affairs, or all the sexless marriages.

Also, a lot of Christian thinking, or an assumption, on the topic of marriage (and this comes across in Christian books about marriage and dating, especially aimed at singles in their teens and twenties, though not limited at them only), is that an un-married person has to become mature, totally responsible, and completely godly before God will grant that person a spouse.

Exactly how godly, responsible, and mature is this married, family idolizer Phillips, if he’s diddling another woman while he’s married?

Yeah, see, examples like this go to show that you do not have to achieve sinless perfection or even moral superiority in life as a requirement by God for marriage.

If God really had a set list of criteria (such as being mature and godly) that he expects all Christians to meet before allowing them a spouse, there would be zero married Christians.

I’ve not yet seen a study on this topic, but I wonder, are Christian men more likely to be adulterous or to be abusive towards their wives than Non Christians, or are the numbers about evenly split?

That is, I decided some months ago to discard the “do not be yoked to a Non Christian” teaching, because Christian men, from what I have seen, are no more likely to treat a wife well than a Non-Christian would be, so I might as well increase my odds of marrying by opening up the pool of candidates to Non-Christians.

(Link): Vision Forum’s Doug Phillips: Extra-Marital Relationship Was ‘Sufficiently Serious’ to Resign, Confirms ‘Inappropriate Physical Component’

    BY MORGAN LEE , CP CONTRIBUTOR
    November 15, 2013|12:39 pm

    Former Vision Forum Ministries president Doug Phillips reiterated yesterday that his decision to resign from his leadership position was the proper outcome following his acknowledgement that he had “inappropriate relationship” with a woman who was not his wife.

    Phillips also elaborated on the details of his relationship which he had previously only disclosed as “inappropriately romantic and affectionate” and asserted that he had not known the woman in a “Biblical sense.”

    “Some reading the words of my resignation have questioned if there was an inappropriate physical component with an unmarried woman. There was, and it was intermittent over a period of years,” Phillips wrote.

In light of his admission that there was Physical activity, here is Olivia Newton John’s Let’s Get Physical video.


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Related posts, this blog:

(Link): Leader of Hyper Family Focused, Fertility Cult (Vision Forum Ministries) Steps Down After Admitting to Having an “Emotional Affair”

(Link): Focus on the Family Members Practice Infidelity or Homosexuality and Get Divorced and Remarry – links to exposes

(Link): Married Preacher and Father of Five (Geronimo Aguilar) In Trouble Over Multiple Affairs and Sex with Kids

(Link): Getting Married Does Not Necessarily Guarantee Frequent Hot Satisfying Sexy Sex – Husband is Sexless for Eight Years (article)

(Link): Getting Married Does Not Necessarily Guarantee Frequent Hot Satisfying Sexy Sex / (also discussed): Gender and Sex Stereotypes (article)

(Link): Focus on the Family advice columnist perpetuates stereotypes about single women

(Link): Christian Gender and Sex Stereotypes Act as Obstacles to Christian Singles Who Want to Get Married (Not All Men Are Obsessed with Sex)

(Link): Pastor Busted in Prostitution Sting – If Married Sex So Great Why Do So Many Married Christian Men Have Affairs

(Link): Prejudiced Writer Stupidly Blames Slutty Halloween Costumes and Societal Ills on Childless the Childfree, and Unmarried Adults – but Married people and parents are not perfect either

(Link): More Married Couples Admit to Sexless Marriages (various articles) / Christians promise you great frequent sex if you wait until marriage, but the propaganda is not true

(Link): Wife of Kinda Famous TV Preacher Guy Committed Multiple Affairs – He tells congregation at church service