Husband Slept With Dead Wife For Six Nights

Husband Slept With Dead Wife For Six Nights

(Link): Heartbroken husband slept next to dead wife for six nights as family gave ‘beautiful and comforting’ farewell

A heartbroken husband has told how he slept next to his dead wife’s body in the same room for six days – because he did not want her to be taken to a mortuary.

Russell Davison, 50, decided he wanted to be in control of what happened to his partner’s corpse after she passed way from cancer on April 21.

Continue reading “Husband Slept With Dead Wife For Six Nights”

Eight of the Most Shocking Cases of People Who Died During Sex

Eight of the Most Shocking Cases of People Who Died During Sex

Just another advantage to being celibate….

(Link): Eight of the Most Shocking Cases of People Who Died During Sex

HARD LUCK
From a bet gone wrong to the man suffocated by BOOBS…these are 8 of the most bizarre cases of people who died during sex

The tragic stories highlight a dangerous side to everyone’s favourite pastime, so remember to take care next time you get your rocks off

Crushed by porn stash

One man recently met a sticky end after being (Link): crushed by a mountain of pornographic magazines.

The Japanese man, named as 50-year-old Joji, was found six months after his six-tonne stash of porn magazines fell on him.

Cleaners tasked with tidying his neglected flat found that the entire apartment was rammed with the explicit magazines.

It is unknown whether the man, a former car-manufacturer, had died from a heart attack and then fell into a stack of pornography, or whether he was crushed to death by his X-rated collection.

Continue reading “Eight of the Most Shocking Cases of People Who Died During Sex”

Death, Grief, Marriage, Single Again, Soul Sleep, Christianity, Obnoxious Male Fixation on Female Looks

Death, Grief, Marriage, Single Again, Soul Sleep, Christianity, Obnoxious Male Fixation on Female Looks

I have several topics I’d like to address here. I’m going to discuss death, grief, dating, how men are too fixated on women’s looks, etc, and so on, all in the same post.

I learned from watching the Christian program “It is Written” today (Feb 2017) that the wife of Christian TV host Mike Tucker, Gayle, died. I’m not sure when the episode was first filmed or first aired.

You can read a transcript of that episode, “From Grief To Hope” (Link, off site): here.

You might be able to watch that very episode or one like it here: (Link, off site): Coping with Grief.

I see from an online obit that Gayle Tucker passed away in April 2016.

I am sorry for his loss.

I lost my mother, and it hurt a lot.

(Link, off site):  Gayle Tucker, Beloved Marriage Counselor on Faith For Today TV, Dead at 60

April 2016 –  The prominent Adventist television personality dies after a brief struggle with pancreatic cancer.

(Link, off site):   Beloved Christian TV Host, Couples’ Counselor Dead at 60

I learned a few years ago that the hosts and backers of “It Is Written” are SDAs (Seventh Day Adventists).

I also learned from a glance over google search results that Mike Tucker is a Seventh Day Adventist.

Part of SDA theology is something called “Soul Sleep,” a view that I totally disagree with and find discouraging and cruel.

Continue reading “Death, Grief, Marriage, Single Again, Soul Sleep, Christianity, Obnoxious Male Fixation on Female Looks”

Some Liberals Call Gatlinburg Fire Punishment for Trump Support

Some Liberals Call Gatlinburg Fire Punishment for Trump Support

Well this is a switch.

Usually, we find right wing Christians saying that every natural disaster in the United States is due to homosexuality or abandonment of support to Israel, but here we have liberals saying that the wildfires in TN are due to people voting for Trump.

(Link) : Some Liberals Call Gatlinburg Fire Punishment for Trump Support

Excerpt:

Pastor Commits Suicide After Accidentally Sexting Penis Photos Meant For Mistress to Church Members

Pastor Commits Suicide After Accidentally Sexting Photos Meant For Mistress to Church Members

(Link):   Pastor takes own life after sending penis photos to church WhatsApp group

(Link):  Philandering priest hangs himself after sending his penis pictures to church WhatsApp group

The picture caption said “Wife is away, it’s all yours tonight”.

September 20, 2016 15:14 BST

By Staff Reporter

A South African pastor has killed himself after accidentally sending pictures of his penis to his church WhatsApp group chat

Pastor Letsego, from the Christ Embassy – a Christianmegachurch founded in Nigerian in the 1990s – is believed to have sent the pictures accompanied by the caption: “Wife is away, it’s all yours tonight”, the Daily Post reported.

Letsego, who was married, was allegedly trying to send the pictures to his lover, also a member of the church.

Continue reading “Pastor Commits Suicide After Accidentally Sexting Penis Photos Meant For Mistress to Church Members”

On Not Filtering Every Choice Through the Bible

On Not Filtering Every Choice Through the Bible

This is one of those topics I’m working my way through right now. Maybe a year from now, my opinion will flip on it. But here is where I am now.

I was first made aware of this post from John Piper’s “Desiring God” web site via someone posting to SCCL Facebook group.

Here it is:

(Link):  How to Drink Orange Juice to the Glory of God by John Piper

Excerpts:

  • I said that one of my reasons for believing this comes from 1 Corinthians 10:31. “Whether, then, you eat or drink or whatever you do, do all to the glory of God.” I asked, “Is it sin to disobey this Biblical commandment?” Yes.
  • …Some of you then asked the practical question: Well, how do you “eat and drink” to the glory of God? Say, orange juice for breakfast?
  • ….Orange juice was “created to be received with thanksgiving by those whobelieve the truth.” Therefore, unbelievers cannot use orange juice for the purpose God intended—namely, as an occasion for heartfelt gratitude to God from a truth heart of faith.
  • But believers can, and this is how they glorify God. Their drinking orange juice is “sanctified by means of the word of God and prayer.”

Yes, it’s an entire post explaining why and how Christians may drink Orange Juice to the glory of God.

This is a part of Christianity that I am glad to leave behind. In my faith crisis of the last few years, there have been some advantages to ceasing turning to the Bible as an authority in decision-making in life in every area.

Continue reading “On Not Filtering Every Choice Through the Bible”

Groom Finds Bride Dead Morning After their Wedding

Groom Finds Bride Dead Morning After their Wedding

This is one of those things that few in our marriage-centric culture and churches consider: even if you do marry, there is no guarantee the marriage will be happy or that the spouse will live. Maybe the spouse will divorce you or be abusive, so you have to divorce. Or, like in this story, your spouse passes away.

Being married or getting married is not the end-all, be-all solution to eradicating loneliness that so many Hollywood movies or church sermons or Christian or conservative based think tanks make it out to be.

(Link): Groom Finds Bride Dead Morning After their Wedding

Excerpts:

  • May 20, 2016
  • DARLINGTON, England — The morning after what should have been one of the happiest days of their lives as a couple, a (Link): groom was mourning his new bride who died in her sleep on their wedding night.
  • Mariola Michalowski, 38, died just hours after celebrating her marriage May 13, to partner Krzysztof, who was known as Kris.

Continue reading “Groom Finds Bride Dead Morning After their Wedding”

Jezebel Site and xoJane Site: Pot Meet Kettle – On Supporting All Women’s Voices

Jezebel Site and xoJane Site: Pot Meet Kettle – On Supporting All Women’s Voices

I saw this paragraph or so in (Link): an article on Jezebel’s site (by S. Edwards; title: “xoJane Publishes Terrible Article By a Woman Who’s Glad Her Friend Died, Then Deletes Her Byline“):

  • It’s a well-known fact that outrageous confessionals—the kind that populate xoJane’s section, It Happened to Me — garner traffic. Outrage, disgust and anger are the stuff of going viral (a phrase that conjures up disease as much as anything else). Yet xoJane seems to consistently cross an unspoken line, confusing any woman’s opinion as one inherently worth publishing, no matter the opinion, or its costs.

Continue reading “Jezebel Site and xoJane Site: Pot Meet Kettle – On Supporting All Women’s Voices”

No, I Do Not Like Richonne (Rick and Michonne as Romantic Couple on television series The Walking Dead) – Sex Can Be Risky in the Apocalypse

No, I Do Not Like Richonne (Rick and Michonne as Romantic Couple on television series The Walking Dead) – Sex Can Be Risky in the Apocalypse

This may be, perhaps, the only, or one of the very few, anti- Richonne blog posts on the internet.

  • To any Richonne Fans Who Are Reading This
  • If you have not seen my “About” page (and I currently have this stated at the top of the blog itself), I seldom permit dissenting views to be published on my blog.
  • Therefore, if you are a rabid Richonne supporter who leaves me a nasty, rude comment in response to this post, I likely will not publish it.
  • I don’t even bother to read the entirety of such posts – the moment I glance a few cuss words or rudeness in the first sentence of a post that is pending, awaiting me to grant permission to publish it, I hit the “trash can” button and delete it. I don’t even read the entire thing once I have ascertained it’s a vitriolic post.
  • So please, don’t waste your time or mine by composing one.
  • There is an addendum below addressing people on Twitter who were commenting to me how having Michonne, a black woman, in a romance with a white guy on this TV show, was supposedly oh- so- important. I have addressed those types of comments much farther blow (towards the end of the post, before the “Related Posts” section).
  • See also: (Link, off site):  Your Status as a Single Person Is a Diversity Issue

I did an internet search or two in the days after the February 21, 2016 airing of the zombie apocalypse show The Walking Dead episode in which the Rick Grimes character has sex with the Michonne character for the first time.

In the vast majority of reaction I see in blog posts or comments on entertainment sites that discuss “Richonne,” most people appear approving or enthusiastic about this TV show pairing. I cannot fathom why this is so.

I remain perplexed at the drooling, nutty, overboard enthusiasm so many TV viewers have for wanting to see TV characters date each other.

Further, if you dare disagree on these other sites about “Richonne” and admit to disliking “Richonne,” no matter how politely you state your views, many of these “Richonne” supporters become unhinged and vitriolic.

I happen to like the Michonne character and the Rick character – Rick has always been one of my favorite characters on the show. I have nothing against either actor who plays these characters.

However, I do not like or enjoy a Michonne-Rick romantic pairing.

I did not enjoy the show attempting to romantically pair Rick up with Jessie, either.

(Jessie was later killed by being eaten by zombies).

I mention this early on, as a lot of these Richonne fans wrongly assume anyone who dislikes “Richonne” must be a “Jessie – Rick shipper.”

Continue reading “No, I Do Not Like Richonne (Rick and Michonne as Romantic Couple on television series The Walking Dead) – Sex Can Be Risky in the Apocalypse”

A Book Called “Prude” That Uses the Term “Neo Virgin”

A Book Called “Prude” That Uses the Term “Neo Virgin”

An author by the name of Carrie Lloyd was on Christian TV program The 700 Club today. She wrote a book called “Prude” about her choice to remain celibate after having been very sexually active while in her 20s. I think she also used the term “Neo Virgin” on the show and maybe in her book.

I have not read her book, I only saw her interview on the show today.

She was raised in a Christian household, but later drifted away from the Christian faith and then came back to the faith later.

I support her choice to remain celibate until marriage. I don’t have a problem there. However, I have to admit to not being fond of terms such as “Neo Virgin.”

Either you are a virgin or you are not one. I’m over 40 years of age and have never had sexual intercourse, not even with my ex fiance, because I was wanting to wait until marriage to have sex.

I find terms such as “Neo Virgin” or other Christian phrases such as “Born Again Virgin” or “Spiritual Virgin” to be a little demeaning to actual, honest to God virgins such as myself. Such terms dilute the real meaning of, or state of being, a virgin.

I also find it ironic that Christian culture continues to uphold fornicators as experts in how to resist sexual temptation or how to go about sexual purity and celibacy, rather than publish books by honest- to- God virgins who are past the age of 30 or older who are still maintaining their virginity.

Here is a link to a page that discusses Ms. Lloyd’s story and book:

(Link): Making Healthy Relationship Choices in an Unhealthy World

Excerpts:

  • ….Growing up, Carrie was teased about her stance on abstinence.  By the time she entered high school, she was infamous with the boys at the neighboring school as one of the last remaining virgins.  Once her photo was pinned to the school notice board.  She was the target to see which boy could get her to lose her virginity.  Her peers didn’t feel the same way she did.  “No one wanted to save it for one person,” says Carrie.  “This subtle prejudice toward my choices made me more determined to hold out.”
  • …. Meanwhile, women were fighting for someone to love them.  “I call this the curse of Eve,” says Carrie.  The curse says, “Everything will be redeemed once I have found my husband,” and that a woman will be happier having found her purpose.
  • THE DECADENT DAYS
  • Carrie was 18 when her father underwent a serious heart operation so severe it almost killed him and left him with some brain damage.  In his effort to deal with his pain, Carrie’s dad began to drink.  “Seeing my preacher papa enter into substance abuse caused me to question everything he taught,” says Carrie.  “What happened to relying on God?”
  • When she was 23, Carrie’s dad passed away.  One night Carried decided to walk away from God.  She was mad at God and men and started on the path of hurting others.  Several years later, Carrie had several physical relationships and reached the lowest point of her life since her father died.  She prayed to God and heard an inaudible voice that said, I’ve been here all along.  Carrie realized that God had never left her.

According to the rest of the article, and from what I remember from the TV interview, when she decided at some stage in her late 20s (or her 30s?) to remain abstinent, some of the men she dated broke up with her. One guy did stay with her for two years and respected her “no sex until I marry” belief, but the relationship ended, though not due to the celibate aspect.

Here is a page about her book:

(Link):  Prude: Misconceptions Of A Neo-Virgin

  • Overview
  • “SEX. LOVE. VIRGINITY? In the dating game, the V-word has become as strange and complicated as the L-word, with purity as outdated as pay phones.
  • What is an ex-athiest, post-porn addict, unorthodox Christian girl to do these days?
  • How can she create boundaries without scaring off every available guy? Is purity even possible without being puritanical? In this candid, humorous account of the true-life trials of Christian dating, the author shares the wisdom she’s gleaned in her quest for love in a modern world.
  • She guides with grace and honesty through the often hush-hush topics of sex, porn, shame, female competition, misconceptions about purity, and those dreaded “waiting till marriage: conversations.

————————–

Related Posts:

(Link):  Churches Would Rather Hear From Ex Porn Stars Than Adult Celibates or Virgins – Church Invites Ex Porn Star to be Guest Speaker

 (Link):   Why are young feminists so clueless about sex? by M. Wente

(Link): Article: Our Born-Again Virgin Bachelor – Secondary or Spiritual Virginity

(Link): Celebrity Deems Herself A Born Again Virgin And Vows to Stay Celibate “For A Year” – Oh Puh-leaze

(Link):  Woman Says She Refuses to Hook-up with Men ‘For Fun’ – Says Most Men She’s Met Are Willing to Wait

(Link):  How About Using Celibates as Role Models For Celibacy? (Oddity: Christians Holding Up Non-Virgins [Fornicators] As Being Experts or Positive Examples on Sexual Purity)

(Link):  She’s Waiting Until Marriage to Have Sex. Here’s Her Response to Those ‘Inevitable Jerks’ Who Think Her Decision Is ‘Stupid’ – by E. Kahn

(Link):  Sometimes Fornication Can Impact Another Relationship Later – One Example

(Link):  When Adult Virginity and Adult Celibacy Are Viewed As Inconvenient or As Impediments

(Link): Self Control – everyone has it, is capable of it, but most choose not to use it (New Study Says Conservatives Have Better Self Control Than Liberals)

(Link):  Hypocrisy: Secular Pundits Judge Christian Sexuality: Josh Duggar’s So-Called Vanilla Sexual Preferences Deemed Dull

(Link): False Christian Teaching: “Only A Few Are Called to Singleness and Celibacy”

(Link): Statistics Show Single Adults Now Outnumber Married Adults in the United States (2014)

(Link): The Netherworld of Singleness for Some Singles – You Want Marriage But Don’t Want to Be Disrespected or Ignored for Being Single While You’re Single

(Link):  Ever Notice That Christians Don’t Care About or Value Singleness, Unless Jesus Christ’s Singleness and Celibacy is Doubted or Called Into Question by Scholars?

(Link):  Are Single People the Lepers of Today’s Church? by Gina Dalfonzo

(Link):  No Christians and Churches Do Not Idolize Virginity and Sexual Purity – Christians Attack and Criticize Virginity Sexual Purity Celibacy / Virginity Sexual Purity Not An Idol

(Link): Secular, Left Wing Feminist Writer Marcotte on Anyone Choosing To Be a Virgin Until Marriage: “It’s a Silly Idea” – What Progressive Christians, Conservative Christians, Non Christians, and Salon’s Amanda Marcotte Gets Wrong About Christian Views on Virginity

(Link): Want To But Can’t – The One Christian Demographic Being Continually Ignored by Christians | Re: Marriage Not Happening for Hetero-sexual Christians Over the Age of 30

(Link): On ‘Late’-In-Life Virginity Loss (from The Atlantic)

(Link): Why Some People Become 30 Year Old Virgins (Article / Study)

(Link): Virginity Lost, Experience Gained (article with information from study about virginity)

(Link): Some Atheists Are Just As Ignorant About Adult Singleness and Celibacy as Progressive Christians, Secular Feminists, and Protestant Evangelical or Conservative Christians

(Link): Celebrities who waited until marriage to have sex (list 2)

(Link): Living Myths About Virginity – article from The Atlantic

(Link): I Shouldn’t Need An Excuse To Be A Virgin – (Secular Editorial Defends Virginity – More Rare Than a Unicorn Sighting)

(Link): Virgins and Celibates are Sexual – Not Asexual and Androgynous – You don’t have to have sex to possess sexuality

(Link): Asexuality and Asexuals

(Link):  Meagan Good Tells Single Women Why They Should Stop Having Sex

(Link):  Preacher: ‘They Will Know We Are Christians By Our Hot SEX Lives’ – and once more, never-married celibate adults and their experiences, wisdom, and input are ignored

(Link):  Want To Grow Your Church? Advertise Sex (Story via A Little Leaven Blog)

(Link):  The Decisive Marriage – Study Says Couples Who Don’t Have Pre-Marital Sex, or Not Much or Not Many Sexual Partners Pre-Marriage, Have Better Quality or Longer Lasting Marriages

(Link): Weak Argument Against Celibacy / Virginity / Sexual Purity by the Anti Sexual Purity Gestapo – Sexual Compatibility or Incompatibility – (i.e., Taking Human Beings For Test Spins – Humans As Sexual Commodities) (Part 2)

(Link):   Stop Pretending Sex Never Hurts, By D.C. McAllister

(Link):  The Myth of Safe Sex by D. Foley

Cops: Pantsless Motorist Killed In Crash Was Masturbating While Watching Porn Flick On His Phone

Cops: Pantsless Motorist Killed In Crash Was Masturbating While Watching Porn Flick On His Phone

(Link): Cops: Pantsless Motorist Killed In Crash Was Masturbating While Watching Porn Flick On His Phone

  • A Detroit man who died early Sunday in a one-car crash was pantsless and masturbating while watching a pornographic movie on his cell phone, according to police who investigated the accident.
  • The rollover crash occurred around 3:40 AM as motorist Clifford Ray Jones, 58, was driving a 1996 Toyota on a freeway near Interstate 75.
  •  

    Michigan State Police officials report that Jones became “distracted” while watching the film and lost control of the car, which overturned. Jones, who was not wearing a seat belt, was partially ejected through the car’s sun roof and died on the scene,

  •  

    Accident investigators discovered that Jones, who was alone in the Toyota, was not wearing pants at the time of the crash.

——————-

Related:

(Link):  Couple Fall To Death Having Sex Against Window

People Suspect Pastor Davey Blackburn May Have Something to Do With His Wife’s Murder

People Suspect Pastor Davey Blackburn May Have Something to Do With His Wife’s Murder

(In the days after making this post, I have added new links, mostly at the bottom of the post)

————-

I haven’t been keeping up with this news story all that much. I’ve just skimmed a few other blog posts about it.

A lot of Christian chatter I’m seeing online indicates people suspect that Davey Blackburn, who is a pastor, may have hired a hit man to murder his wife, or he killed her himself. They find his actions suspicious, his demeanor and tone when talking about his deceased wife suspicious.

All I care to say at this point that if true, if this pastor husband did in fact murder his wife or paid someone to have her killed, I would not be shocked.

I already keep a long, running list of such stories – I have many blog posts on my blog here with links to news stories of men who claim to be Christ-followers, who are married, who are arrested for killing or beating their wives. You can view that collection of links (Link): here.

The police said a few days ago that they cleared the husband, but still, a lot of people I’ve seen online think that the husband had something to do with his wife’s murder.

Let this news story of the pastor’s wife being found dead, with a bullet wound in her head, be a reminder that if you do actually marry, there is no guarantee your spouse will live for years with you.

Your spouse may die, leaving you single again.

I mention this because secular and Christian culture tend to paint this picture of life that there is a “soul mate” for everyone, that you will find this soul mate person, marry them, and live happily ever after.

The truth is, your spouse may be a crime victim, get in a car wreck and die, or develop cancer and die.

Christians therefore need to stop placing so much emphasis on “the nuclear family” and marriage – the New Testament teaches that all believers in Christ (and Christ himself) are to take priority over your spouse or blood relations.

The way this works, is that if you are married and your spouse dies, you will not be left completely alone, IF your church family (assuming you have one) will be your family too. You won’t be left alone.

However,  many churches don’t view other Christians in this manner; they all think the cure for loneliness is to marry and have some kids. But what happens if you never marry, you divorce, or your spouse dies?

Edit. Here are some new links, by way of Watchkeep’s Twitter and Janet Mefferd’s Twitter:

(Link):  Questions, Inconsistencies Remain in Murder of Indiana Pastor’s Wife

Excerpts:

  • Jarrett emphasized that the pastor is not a person of interest, but must be investigated because in so many cases, husbands and boyfriends are involved when a female is murdered.
  • The pastor said he left the house at 6am on the morning of the murder to go to the gym, then found his wife when he returned.
  • Jarrett said another issue is that authorities cannot pin down the exact time that Amanda Blackburn was shot.
  • Therefore, Jarrett said police can’t rule out that Amanda was shot before the pastor left.
  • Jarrett said the suspect in the surveillance image is said to have broken into a home nearby beforehand, but there was no sign of forced entry at the Blackburn home and nothing was taken.
  • … Jarrett noted that there was no “discernible” sadness, tears or anguish from the pastor during the interview.
  • He said all people grieve in different ways, but others have also pointed out that the pastor smiled at other points in the interview.

(Link):   Pastor takes time away from Indianapolis to mourn slain wife

Here are links to the news story about Blackburn and his wife’s murder:

(Link):  Cops vow to catch killer of Indianapolis pastor’s wife as they probe next-door break in: ‘We will find you’

Nov 13, 2015

  • Indiana crime fighters cleared a popular pastor in the fatal shooting of his pregnant 28-year-old wife and narrowed their investigation to a rash of burglaries in the couple’s leafy Indianapolis neighborhood, officials said during an emotional press conference Friday morning.

Continue reading “People Suspect Pastor Davey Blackburn May Have Something to Do With His Wife’s Murder”

Mother of Dead Daughter Says Brother and Other Family Neglected Her During Time of Grief

Mother of Dead Daughter Says Brother and Other Family Neglected Her During Time of Grief

This woman’s letter to Ask Amy sounds so familiar to me. I went through similar stuff after my mother died.

I wrote about one person’s dismal response to me in my time of grief here:

In my time of grief, I either got entirely inappropriate responses from people, I got cliches, or I was completely ignored- or I was brushed off when I finally started calling some of these people and directly asking for emotional support.

Here’s the woman’s letter to Ask Amy (I have just a small number of comments below this letter and the partial reply from Amy):

  • My daughter passed away last year after a long illness. We had a memorial service and many friends and family gathered to celebrate her life.
  •  My brother from out of town attended, bringing his two small grandchildren. He treated it like a family reunion, offered no condolences, and left early the next day to tour the city.
  • His adult children with families of their own didn’t attend or send any acknowledgment.
  • I thought we were close, as we both lost someone close to us within the last three years.
  • We supported him during his grieving period and called frequently. We donated to a charity as a memorial to his loved one.
  • None of this was reciprocated. I feel so disrespected. How do I get past it?
  • [Signed] Grieving

Here is part of Amy’s response:

  • Dear Grieving:
  • One way to inch your way past this hurt is to admit to yourself how emotionally limited and thoughtless these relatives are. You just have to “own” this truth about them.
  • Push through your disappointment until you realize that these deeply flawed humans are not only adding to your grief, but are also getting in the way of you reveling in the loveliness of your daughter’s life.

Americans are terrible at comforting anyone in grief, if they even bother to try. Christians are not excluded from this accusation.

Some of the worst wounds I got after my mother’s death came from self-professing Christians, many of whom go to church weekly.

But I’d say many just do not want to deal with it. Despite the fact the Bible says to weep with those who weep, and to do good to others in so far as you can, most Christians brushed me off or tried to get me out of their hair as quickly as they could by uttering platitudes.

Nobody wanted to really invest the time and effort of sitting with me for a mere hour or two once every few months to let me talk through the loss, what I was going through, and what I was feeling.

Proverbs 3:27

  • Do not withhold good from those to whom it is due, when it is in your power to act.

———————————

Related:

(Link): People Really Hack Me Off (Part 2) The Clueless Christian Who Likes To Send You Upbeat Updates About Himself In Reply To Your Announcement of Your Mother’s Death (ex friend of mine)

Conservative, Church-Going Christian Guy Participates in Threesome, Jumps To Death / Masculinity So Fragile Twitter Hash Tag

Conservative, Church-Going Christian Guy Participates in Threesome, Jumps To Death

For any newbies to this blog:

  • I am right wing, conservative, and I was Republican.
  • (I am still right of center these days, but the GOP is deeply disappointing to me now (though not for most of the reasons liberals find the GOP disappointing), so I may be leaving the GOP, I have not decided on that  – and no, I am not a Democrat).
  • Furthermore, I was raised with traditional values in a Christian home. I was completely Christian up until around 2013 or so.
  •  I still have a lot of respect for conservative Christian values, but I now see that a lot of conservative Christians mis-use or misinterpret the Bible, and, in the process, some are, or can be, very rude, dismissive, or arrogant to anyone who doesn’t share their beliefs in toto.
  • (But no, I am not a supporter of liberal Christian theology, either. Those guys treat the Bible too much like Silly Putty.)
  • While I disagree with left wing, secular feminists about 95% or more of the time, I do believe they are occasionally right on some topics sometimes..
  • Unlike most conservatives, I do not automatically tune out liberal feminist arguments and concerns. I usually will take the time to actually go to their blogs, forums, and articles, read what they are saying, and try to understand where they are coming from.
  • Most other conservatives, however, have a knee-jerk tendency to out-right dismiss or ridicule left wing feminist concerns. I think this is a big mistake.
  • I am disappointed that my fellow conservatives do not really take the time to listen and understand what their ideological opponents are saying – I have learned in the last few years that even broken clocks are right twice a day.

Tyler Carlisle

Concerning the news story I am blogging about now:

This guy, Tyler Carlisle,  was a regular church goer.

I would take it that Carlisle would have considered himself a Christian, and it looks like his pastor or church thought that the younger church folks thought of this guy as a role model.

Stories like this just re-enforce my ever-growing belief that the “equally yoked” teaching, which is taught and believed by many Christians, as applies to dating and marriage, is a lot of Hooey, or largely irrelevant to adult singles.

(I grew up as a conservative Christian and used to be a subscriber to the “equally yoked” teaching, for anyone reading this who is new to this blog.)

You have, as in this example (link farther below), church-going Christian guys who are having pre-marital sex – via threesomes, no less – and then stabbing his friend in the neck in a jealous fit, and I don’t see his (or their) morals necessarily being any better or worse than your average Non-Christian.

There are probably Non-Christians with better morals than this.

I can also see (thanks to stories like this), how it’s better to be single and celibate. You sure do avoid a lot of grief in life without getting mixed up in love affairs or sexual acts.

Masculinity So Fragile

Some of my fellow right wingers and conservatives (that’s correct, yours truly who is writing this post is NOT a left winger) are having a cow over the “Masculinity So Fragile” hash tag on Twitter, but I think stories like this go to show there may be something to the concept.

I cannot imagine most women feeling so slighted during a sexual escapade or from not receiving what they believe is enough attention from a male suitor that they deal with it by stabbing someone in the neck and then jumping from a window.

This story shows that a lot of men do have a very deeply held sense of entitlement to sex from women.

(I have another news story to blog about some other time that is just as, if not, more troubling in some ways than this one, which also highlights male entitlement towards sex and women.)

This news story also shows that there is something deeply wrong with any religious group, and with a secular culture, that produces something like this – there is something very “off” and disturbing about attitudes towards dating, sex, and women that is being communicated to a lot of men.

For more examples of that, of male entitlement in dating, or towards women in general, please see links at the bottom of this post, under the “Related Posts” section.

(Link):  Student jumped to his death from window during threesome after stabbing friend in jealous rage

(Link):   Yale student jumped out of window during threesome after stabbing his best friend when he felt that he was getting too much attention from their female partner

  • Tyler Carlisle, 21 stabbed friend Alexander Michaud in the neck on May 26 and then jumped out a window to his death
  • The police report from the incident now reveals the two men had been having a threesome with another woman at the time
  • Michaud, now 22, told an officer that Carlisle had become jealous when he thought the girl was not paying enough attention to him and stabbed him
  • Carlisle was pronounced dead on the scene, less than one week after graduating from Yale
  • The unnamed female was unharmed in the incident, and she and Michaud still attend Yale

Continue reading “Conservative, Church-Going Christian Guy Participates in Threesome, Jumps To Death / Masculinity So Fragile Twitter Hash Tag”

Pastor Outed on Ashley Madison Cheating Site Commits Suicide

Pastor Outed on Ashley Madison Cheating Site Commits Suicide

Times I’m glad I’m single and don’t have sex….

(Link) Pastor Outed on Ashley Madison Site Commits Suicide

Excerpts:

  • He was married with two children. His daughter, Callie, was teaching in front of 250 college students when she got the call. Her father had killed himself.
  • It was August 24, six days after hackers exposed the names of millions of people who had signed up for Ashley Madison, the notorious site for those seeking affairs. Gibson’s name was on the list.
  • His wife, Christi, discovered her husband’s body.

  • …In his suicide note, Gibson chronicled his demons. He also mentioned Ashley Madison.
  • “He talked about depression. He talked about having his name on there, and he said he was just very, very sorry,” Christi said. “What we know about him is that he poured his life into other people, and he offered grace and mercy and forgiveness to everyone else, but somehow he couldn’t extend that to himself.”
  • …Gibson said her husband was likely worried he’d lose his job.”It wasn’t so bad that we wouldn’t have forgiven it, and so many people have said that to us, but for John, it carried such a shame,” she said.

    Gibson, 56, was known as a great teacher with a “quirky laugh,” but he had struggled with depression and addiction in the past, his family said.

(hat tip Defend the Sheep, Twitter)

Owen Strachan’s “Being Single To Bring God Glory” Essay (other topics addressed, such as Christian codependency, death, grief)

Gender Complementarian Owen Strachan’s “Being Single To Bring God Glory” Essay

The following post contains one or two cuss words – the majority of the post is “clean,” however. Proceed at your own risk if you are a dainty Christian flower who gets the vapors upon seeing crude language.

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Owen Strachan, who almost always gets 99% of commentary about gender roles and gender incorrect (he’s also written some (Link): very insulting, (Link): way more insulting, or (Link): weird things about gender roles – Strachan used to be head guy at CBMW, an organization that promotes the bogus gender complementarian view), wrote this page at Patheos about a year ago about adult singleness and giving God glory.

In this short blog post, (Link): Being Single To Give God Glory Strachan links to another, longer version of the same editorial hosted on Boundless (longer version: (Link): complete version at Boundless).

A reminder:  I am not a fan of Boundless, one of several reasons is that Boundless laser focuses on 20 something singles ((Link): for example and (Link): for example) but ignores older singles, and some of their writers give horrible or insulting advice to and about singlehood.

After I began pointing out on my blog and under a few of their blog posts, that there are tons of over 30 singles out there, I notice the writers at Boundless began lumping 30 somethings in with 20 somethings, rather than focusing solely on 20 somethings as had been their previous habit.

However, the folks at Boundless don’t seem to notice or care that there is a significant crop of 40 and older (never married) singles in existence, too. It took them a long, long time to catch on to the fact that there are singles over the age of 29.

Returning to the topic of Strachan’s post about singleness. Not all of Strachan’s blog post about adult singles is terrible. I agreed with a few parts of it.

Strachan actually mentions a few of the same points I’ve been bringing up on my blog here in the last 3 or 4 or however many years.

I believe his blog post was written in 2014, but I did not see it until today (August 2015).

Before I paste in a few of the excerpts from his blog post (probably much farther below), the parts I agreed with, I wanted to comment on this “give glory to God” rhetoric that shows up in his post’s title.

Not only does Strachan use the “glory of God” phrase in his posts about singleness, but I saw Challies (another Christian blogger) use the same phrase in talking to a Christian woman in my same situation (over the age of 35, never married, a virgin).

Challies was saying to this lady, under his post (which essentially put down adult virginity), under her comments to him on his post page, that this woman remaining a virgin over her mid 30s and that she was still single was all to “God’s glory.”

Now, I don’t want to spend a long time dissecting this or commenting on it, but suffice it to say, it offends me, annoys me, and hacks me off when Christians trot out this “be single and be a virgin to God’s glory,” or that they insist that being a single virgin is for his glory.

Before I go further with that, I must also note that Strachan has a graphic on his Patheos page that says “Don’t Waste Your Singleness.” Ugh, no. I have written about that cliche here:

This “it’s for God’s glory” is a pat answer, a cliche’ response, and does not really address the heartbreak, frustration, or dashed hope of someone who is past 35 and marriage never happened for them, although they had expected and had hoped to marry (and to have sex).

Continue reading “Owen Strachan’s “Being Single To Bring God Glory” Essay (other topics addressed, such as Christian codependency, death, grief)”

Ashley Madison Proves Women Aren’t Interested in Casual Sex by N S Riley – a brief critique of this editorial

Ashley Madison proves women aren’t interested in casual sex by N S Riley

There may be some portions of this editorial I agree with, but there was a point or two where I don’t agree with the author, or I at least disagree slightly:

(Link): Ashley Madison proves women aren’t interested in casual sex – on The New York Post, by N S Riley

As to this excerpt:

  • Feminists remain convinced that if only our “gender norms” were different and there weren’t such a “double standard,” that women could enjoy casual sex the way men can.

I recently did another blog post awhile back which proclaims:

So you can read that later and come to your own conclusions.

I am not a feminist.

I do believe in equal rights for women, but the word “feminist” has so much baggage associated with it, I don’t like to use it to describe myself.

Most often, the word is associated with pro-choice, far left liberals who vote Democrat.

I myself am right wing, pro-life, and generally vote Republican when I do vote. Secular feminists are usually left wing and despise right wing women such as myself, so I don’t feel comfortable using the word “feminist” to describe myself.

I do on occasion agree with some secular feminists on some topics, but I find myself disagreeing with them quite a bit.

As to the point that men supposedly want sex more often and with more partners than women do,  or want casual sex more than women do, there is this link:

One of the things I think is dangerous about other conservatives (I am a conservative myself) bashing feminists and liberals on these points is that it actually makes men less accountable for their actions.

I believe the Bible and common sense dictates that people are perfectly capable of self control, and this includes the area of sexual behavior, and this includes men.

For my fellow conservatives to keep running around saying men are more prone to affairs, or that they want sex more, or what have you, is to perpetuate some notions that harm men and women.

We can see in very far right wing expressions of Christianity, such as branches that practices patriarchy or Quivering, that male sexual sins (including things as serious as child molestation, as in the case of Josh Duggar), is often watered down, and the male is excused for his sin, while the girl or women victims are blamed for having been raped or molested, because they supposedly did not dress “modestly enough,” or what have you.

I thought Christians and fellow conservatives were supposed to support the concept of personal responsibility, but in the area of male sexual sin, they usually do not. Their tendency is instead to be hypocritical and hold women and girls responsible for being raped, leered at, cat called, or molested by men.

Continue reading “Ashley Madison Proves Women Aren’t Interested in Casual Sex by N S Riley – a brief critique of this editorial”

Men Who Have Children Younger Die By Mid-Life -early marriage also involved, says researchers

Men Who Have Children Younger Die By Mid-Life -early marriage also involved, says researchers

So much for the evangelical, Reformed, and Southern Baptist method of guilt tripping and shaming people into early marriage – and parenthood.

They’ve been having fits about the fact that Christians are either not marrying at all (or not having children at all), or are not marrying or having children until later in life, so they’ve been screaming at Christians to marry before they are 25 and to start cranking out kids really young.

Check this out:

(Link):   How the Age You Become a Father Predicts Mortality

  • August 4, 2015
  • By Patricia Reaney
  • NEW YORK, Aug 4 (Reuters) – First-time dads in their early 20s may have the energy and agility to keep up with their young children, but a new study shows early fatherhood can pose perils later in life.
  • Research by Finnish researchers showed that becoming a father before the age of 25 is linked to a higher chance of dying in middle age.“Men who have a child before the age of 22 have a very clear higher midlife mortality than men who have children later, at an average age of 25 to 26,” said Dr. Elina Einio of the University of Helsinki.

Continue reading “Men Who Have Children Younger Die By Mid-Life -early marriage also involved, says researchers”

Elderly Remarried Dude Hung Up Over New Wife’s Two Ex Husbands – Past Relationship Actions Can Have Ramifications

Elderly Remarried Dude Hung Up Over New Wife’s Two Ex Husbands – Past Relationship Actions Can Have Ramifications

This guy, who is in his 60s, wrote to Hax, an advice columnist. He’s upset because his new wife has been married twice before and had a buttload of boyfriends to boot.

This is just another example of how past relationships and/or past sexual activity can in fact bother your current or possible future partners.

You can stamp your feet all day in protest and say, “That should NOT matter!! Your sweetie should totally forgive and overlook your past bedroom activities.”

Yes, you can feel that way and scream that, but that’s like saying something like, “Telephone poles, street lights, and trees should be made out of chocolate candy, and everyone in the world should be able to have a chocolate telephone pole, street light, and tree for free.”

Yes, that would be nice, but it’s not reality, is it?

July 2015 letter from a newly married guy to Hax:

Dear Carolyn (Hax):

  • My wife and I are newlyweds in our 60s. This is my second marriage. My first wife died after 20-plus years together. I had dated a few other women while in school and before meeting my new wife.
  • On the other hand, this is my wife’s third marriage in addition to a few relationships during the 15 years she was single.
  • I fear her eventually growing tired of me and leaving me. I feel like I’m always being compared to the other men in her past. What do I do to get past this?

    (signed) Insecure

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Related Posts:

(Link): Fornication or Previous Marriages Can Negatively Impact Other Relationships Later – Another Example or Two (via Ask Amy, Hax)

(Link):  Sometimes Fornication Can Impact Another Relationship Later – One Example

(Link): Ramifications of Pre Martial Sex – Sky Diver Husband; Also: Stereotypes About All Men Wanting Sex Constantly and Being Visually Stimulated Disproven Again

Hot Car Death: Drunk Dad Leaves 2-Year-Old Girl In Hot Car For 16 Hours On Father’s Day

Hot Car Death: Drunk Dad Leaves 2-Year-Old Girl In Hot Car For 16 Hours On Father’s Day

This is a point I have raised many times before and no doubt will again when similar news stories are published but: Christians have a nasty habit of equating getting married or becoming a parent with becoming mature, responsible, ethical or godly.

By the same token, Christians believe, assume, or teach that single adults who never have children are immoral, selfish, or immature.

But then we see many stories of married parents who commit sins and crimes, like this one, and it took place on Father’s Day, of all days.

How did being a parent make the guy in this story more mature or godly than people who never have kids?

(Link): Hot Car Death: Drunk Dad Leaves 2-Year-Old Girl In Hot Car For 16 Hours On Father’s Day

  • Another tragic hot car death has happened to a young child. This time a 2-year-girl died after being left in a hot car for 16 hours when her drunk father passed out. The incident happened in Baltimore on Father’s Day.
  • 6 ABC News reports that Wilber Leon Carter, 31, was arrested and charged with murder and child abuse after leaving his daughter strapped in her car seat for more than 16 hours on an 89-degree day.
  • Police say paramedics discovered Leasia Carter unconscious and suffering from second-degree burns Monday evening. She was rushed to the hospital, but was pronounced dead when she arrived at the hospital.
  • Documents in the hot car death indicate that Carter informed detectives he’d been drinking Sunday while his daughter was in his custody. He said when he woke up Monday afternoon, he couldn’t recall where his car was parked — or where his daughter was until he found her unconscious in his vehicle.