Divorce Papers Reveal Lysa TerKeurst’s Husband Spent Over $100K on Extramarital Affair

Divorce Papers Reveal Lysa TerKeurst’s Husband Spent Over $100K on Extramarital Affair

Christians are so wrong about marriage in some ways – some of them fall into the old school secular take, which is, you won’t be fully, really happy, or be a true, full fledged adult and “complete,” until you marry.

You can “equally yoked” all you want to, but even should you marry a Christian (if you’re a Christian) it is not a guarantee that your marriage or married sex will be great, loving, or wonderful.

Your Christian spouse may turn out to be abusive or a serial adulterer.

You are far better off being single and staying single than you are in marrying a guy like this lady ended up marrying in the news story below.

Also: contrary to old school Christian dating advice, you don’t have to be perfect to get a spouse.
That so many murderous or abusive scum buckets manage to marry in the first place (even the self professing Christian ones) should tell you that God is not making your obedience, level of godliness( or whatever else), some kind of criteria or requirement before he will send you a spouse.

(Link): Divorce Papers Reveal Lysa TerKeurst’s Husband Spent Over $100K on Extramarital Affair

By Leah MarieAnn Klett, Assistant Editor
April 29, 2021

A recent court filing has shed light on the divorce proceedings between Proverbs 31 Ministries founder Lysa TerKeurst and her husband, Art, including evidence the latter spent over $100,000 of the couple’s money on an “illicit sexual” extramarital affair with a woman he met online.

Lysa TerKeurst filed for divorce in December 2021 and publicly announced her decision in January, revealing her husband of nearly three decades had engaged in “chosen patterns of behavior that dishonor God and the biblical covenant of marriage.” The couple has five adult children together.

Continue reading “Divorce Papers Reveal Lysa TerKeurst’s Husband Spent Over $100K on Extramarital Affair”

Donald Trump Critical Christianity Today Magazine Editor, Mark Galli, Accused of Sexual Harassment by Multiple Women, CT Magazine Allegedly Did Nothing About It

Donald Trump Critical Christianity Today Magazine Editor, Mark Galli, Accused of Sexual Harassment by Multiple Women, CT Magazine Allegedly Did Nothing About It 

Ah, yes. I’ve mentioned here and there on this blog that many progressives and liberals love to spend a lot of time criticizing evangelicals, Republicans, and Trump voters for not agreeing with or supporting left wing causes, they all hate Trump, so they demonize anyone (especially evangelicals) who voted for Trump, and they like to point at any Christian or conservative who’s been accused of sexual assault.

Here we have a case of an editor of a Christian publication who apparently not only heavily criticized Trump, Trump’s supporters, and criticized feminism (not that I agree with feminism on any and every point myself), but he was allegedly sexually harassing several women co-workers at Christianity Today magazine. Hypocritical!

It is so hypocritical how people on the left sexually harass people while claiming ALL evangelicals or ALL Republicans or ALL conservatives are sexual harassers or sexist (some are, yes, but not all).

The left – progressives, liberals, Democrats – has its OWN failures and problems, including with sexism.

While people on the right side of the political spectrum (of which I am one!) have their problem with drooling, knuckle-dragging sexists and the occasional pervert, SO TOO do the Trump-hating, evangelical-hating liberals, progressives, and Democrats.

Even the VERY SAME conservative- haters and Trump- haters who write impassioned editorials for Christian magazines criticizing behaviors of Trump, Trump voters, and conservatives, are themselves guilty of engaging in sexual assault, and/or some of the very same problems they criticize in others.

It’s more frustrating coming from progressives, Democrats, and liberals, though, since they are always mewling about how “anti sexism” they are. No, they’re not.

The very same guys – the conservative haters or Trump haters – writing these editorials are supposedly sexually harassing multiple women!

So spare me, you “Exvangelicals,” progressives, and conservative haters and Trump haters for your hypocritical sanctimony and outrage against anyone who disagrees with YOUR political stances.

This goes to say – yet again! – that while not every non-Christian man on the planet may be a prize, there’s nothing intrinsic in Christianity that makes a man (or not every man!) a ‘better catch’ for a single Christian woman.

You single Christian ladies that are still hanging on to the “equally yoked” rule in regards to dating and marriage are, in my estimation, wasting your time.

You have a supposed Christian man (working as an editor) at a Christian magazine who was allegedly sexually harassing numerous Christian woman, for pete’s sake!

This guy’s supposed faith in Christ means nothing – his profession of faith in Christ did not make him a better person – but some of you single Christian women who believe in the “equally yoked” rule may have been likely to date this sexist clown if he was single, dating, and matched with you on a dating app – while not realizing that he’s a pervert. Please think that over.

(Link): Two top ex-execs at Christianity Today sexually harassed staffers, magazine says

Excerpts:

Former advertising director and editor who authored anti-Trump editorial named

March 15, 2022
by Mark A. Kellner – The Washington Times – Tuesday, March 15, 2022

Two top executives of evangelical magazine Christianity Today committed “unchecked” sexual harassment of colleagues over the course of a dozen years, the publication said Tuesday.

Mark Galli, who was editor-in-chief of the magazine for seven years before his retirement in January 2020, was accused of multiple incidents of ”demeaning, inappropriate and offensive behavior,” in an online article by CT News Editor Daniel Silliman posted Tuesday.

In December 2019, Mr. Galli — a veteran of several editorial positions in his three decades at the Christian publisher — penned a widely noticed editorial condemning then-President Trump as unworthy of office.

…The editor cited a “stacked deck of gross immorality and ethical incompetence” on the part of Mr. Trump that would “crash down on the reputation of evangelical religion and on the world’s understanding of the gospel.”

…Olatokunbo Olawoye, former advertising director at the publication, was accused of imposing himself on female employees. Continue reading “Donald Trump Critical Christianity Today Magazine Editor, Mark Galli, Accused of Sexual Harassment by Multiple Women, CT Magazine Allegedly Did Nothing About It”

Why Are Most Christian Men Living Sexually Immoral Lifestyles? by J. S. Shelton

Why Are Most Christian Men Living Sexually Immoral Lifestyles? by J. S. Shelton

The “equally yoked” rule becomes even more irrelevant in regards to marriage when one considers that this article claims that over half of Christian men don’t see any thing wrong with pornography.

Hmm. Maybe Christians need to start pushing the propaganda to boys and men they used to aim at girls and women all the time: if you, as a single, engage in sexual sin (for the purposes of this post, that would be, specifically, looking at pornography), God will not bless you with a wonderful spouse, if you want to marry.

For years, Christians used to push this at girls and women: if you want God to send you a spouse at all, and a ‘quality’ one, you had better stay a virgin until your wedding night! Turn about is fair play. Time for Christians to start telling men, “If you use porn, God won’t send you a spouse!”

(Link): Why Are Most Christian Men Living Sexually Immoral Lifestyles? by J. S. Shelton

Excerpts:

Churches should be pushing the alarm button…not the snooze button! The sad reality is we are not hearing the alarm because most Christian men are in the clutches of this sin.

Barna Research Group and Josh McDowell Ministries commissioned a (Link): study found that the number of Christian men who view pornography nearly mirrors that of non-Christian men.

How can this be?

Continue reading “Why Are Most Christian Men Living Sexually Immoral Lifestyles? by J. S. Shelton”

Americans Increasingly Ditching Religious Marriage for Secular, Interfaith Relationships: Study

Americans Increasingly Ditching Religious Marriage for Secular, Interfaith Relationships: Study

Not only has there been a surge in editorials the last few weeks by conservative marriage-pushers beating young people over the head to marry and marry really young (I’ve not gotten around to addressing those articles and editorials)-

But I wouldn’t be surprised in the weeks to come if conservatives, both secular and Christian, don’t see this new study about interfaith marriages being on the rise, freak out, panic, and start publishing a lot of fear-mongering editorials or pod-casts guilt tripping or manipulating Christian singles into abiding by “equally yoked” and not even thinking about marrying a Non-Christian.

I have some more comments to make below these two links with excerpts:

(Link): Americans increasingly ditching religious marriages for secular, interfaith relationships: study

Excerpts:

by L. Blair
Feb 18, 2022

Fifty years ago, religious marriage ceremonies were the norm. Most people got married to someone who shared their faith, and just a small fraction of husbands and wives were in relationships where no one practiced a religion.

That trend, according to the latest American National Family Life Survey, is now on the decline as the influence of religion in society has been progressively fading.

…“Only 30% of Americans who were married within the past decade report having their ceremony in a church, house of worship or other religious location and officiated by a religious leader,” the study said.

Interfaith marriage — a union between people who have different religious traditions — has also grown increasingly common and make up 14% of all marriages. Another 14% of Americans are in a religious-secular marriage where one person does not identify with a faith tradition while the other does

Continue reading “Americans Increasingly Ditching Religious Marriage for Secular, Interfaith Relationships: Study”

What Should Christian Singles Know about Online Dating? by S. Bricker

What Should Christian Singles Know about Online Dating? by S. Bricker

As far as Christian dating advice goes, this (article below) isn’t all bad, but it’s pretty pedestrian stuff. If you’re an adult who’s been on the internet for a few years, there’s nothing ground-breaking here.

You really should already know all of the information it contains.

I have more to say about parts of this dating advice article further below:

(Link): What Should Christian Singles Know about Online Dating? by S. Bricker

Excerpts:

According to Pew Research, 12% of married couples in America found their spouse through online dating. While this percentage is not large, online dating has grown in recent years.

People can now easily browse and find compatible relationship matches with only a few clicks or swipes.

Many single Christians find the prospect of online dating appealing as a quick and effective way of finding potential marriage partners, especially when other avenues of finding a compatible match have been exhausted.

Despite the effortless quality of online dating websites and apps, Christian singles need to know that there is more to online dating than what people commonly assume.

Continue reading “What Should Christian Singles Know about Online Dating? by S. Bricker”

Hipster Megachurch in Shambles Over Pastor’s Alleged Affair by Emily Shugerman

Hipster Megachurch in Shambles Over Pastor’s Alleged Affair by Emily Shugerman

I actually blogged about this before, (Link): here.

If I am understanding the reportage correctly, this news story involves a married man who had an affair with a married woman. It’s so important to mention this, because a lot of people – I’d say maybe both in and out of the Christian culture – assume that SINLGE (un-married) adults “hit on” married people and entice them into affairs.

I’m an unmarried adult who is tired of that odious trope.

I periodically see news items about married people who have affairs with other married people, or married people who “hit on” single adults.

Also, if you’re a single Christian, and if you’re exposed to Christian teaching about dating and marriage which suggests that you have to achieve some kind of perfection, level of godliness, or whatever, before God will allow you to get married (I saw this sort of teaching from Christians in the 1980s and 1990s), news stories like this one demonstrates that no, God does not with-hold spouses from imperfect, flawed people.

If God permitted this clown to get married – this church pastor who committed adultery – he won’t withhold a spouse from you.

Also, marriage, contrary to what the “marriage pushers” in Christianity promote, does not always, or necessarily, make a person more ethical, loving, or responsible. If it did, this pastor douche would not have strayed from his wife, and the douche-ette he slept with would not have slept around on her spouse. But they both did. Which means, marriage did not magically conform them to some higher standard.

(Link): Hipster Megachurch in Shambles Over Pastor’s Alleged Affair

The drama has unfolded like a soap opera, with rumors, a parade of employee exits, and a suggestive videotape.

by Emily Shugerman

When volunteers at Venue Church in Chattanooga, Tennessee, arrived at their pastor’s house last November, they were hoping to raise his spirits with a surprise visit.

Instead they got a shock: Pastor Tavner Smith was alone with a female church employee—she in a towel, he in his boxers.

The charismatic 41-year-old hurriedly explained that the two of them had been making chili and hot dogs and gotten food on their clothes, according to one volunteer who was present.

But, as the volunteer put it, “I don’t think none of us was that dumb.”

“If she dropped chili on her clothes, why are you in your boxers?” she recalled thinking. “Was y’all like, throwing chili at each other?”

For the volunteer, the scene confirmed something she had long suspected—that Smith, then married with three children, was secretly carrying on an affair with the employee, who was married to another church staffer.

Continue reading “Hipster Megachurch in Shambles Over Pastor’s Alleged Affair by Emily Shugerman”

Lundy Bancroft on Narcissists vs Abusers for The Audacious Life podcast

Lundy Bancroft on Narcissists vs Abusers for The Audacious Life podcast

The first half to two thirds of this video of what the speakers describe, how they describe the typical views of abusive men, is reminiscent of some Christian Gender Complementarians and their views, and what some complementarian adherents believe.

Especially if you are a Christian single woman who’s wanting to marry AND in particular you were raised by Christian parents or in a church that taught traditional gender roles (perhaps under the phrase or label of “gender complementarianism“) please pay special attention to the video below.

Under “gender complementarian” teachings (and just mainstream, evangelical or Baptist and Christian dating advice), Christian women have been taught to accept all sorts of toxic teachings and to accept on-going mistreatment from a spouse (and from other people in their lives).

Chances are good that if you’re a single Christian woman who was brought up to believe in gender complementarian teachings that you were heavily encouraged to adopt people pleasing or codependent behaviors, beliefs, and attitudes, which will make you attractive to abusers and people with personality disorders (many of whom can be abusive).

Additionally, if you do marry an abusive person (whether he is emotionally, sexually, verbally, or physically abusive) the majority of Christian churches and denominations teach women that divorce is not an option, not even in cases of abuse.

You (if you’re an abused wife asking a Christian for advice or help in regards to your marriage) will usually be told just to “submit more,” give your spouse more sex, and to pray about it – but none of those methods will change your spouse or cause him to stop abusing you.

There is nothing you can say or do that will get your husband to stop abusing you – (Link): nor is it your responsibility to try to fix or change your spouse in the first place.

You have to go into a marriage to a self professing Christian man knowing before-hand  that if your spouse turns abusive, that you must eventually divorce the guy, and you most likely won’t get any help or encouragement in that area from your church, church group, church friends, or pastor.

Most churches and pastors will shame, pressure, and guilt trip an abused wife to stay in the abusive marriage at all costs, because they value the institution of marriage above the safety and mental health of the abused wife.

If you’re a Christian woman in an abusive marriage, your church, church friends, and your preacher will never, ever give you permission to divorce – but you don’t need their permission or approval – you just need your own. It’s your life, not theirs.

(Link – to video on You Tube): Lundy Bancroft on Narcissists vs Abusers for The Audacious Life podcast

Excerpts, video description (from text below the video on the You Tube page):

I’m happy to interview Lundy Bancroft, author, and expert on male abuse behaviors and tactics.

Lundy has 30 years experience working in the field of abuse. His book “Why Does He Do That” is a one of the first I read and it helped tremendously.

Lundy is a lifelong advocate for the safety of women and children and it shines through in his books. You may be wondering whether you’re in a relationship with a Narcissist or an Abuser or someone who’s both.

Continue reading “Lundy Bancroft on Narcissists vs Abusers for The Audacious Life podcast”

Staffers Quit Venue Church After Confronting Pastor With Allegations of Affair, Misconduct by L. Blair

Staffers Quit Venue Church After Confronting Pastor With Allegations of Affair, Misconduct

(Link): Staffers Quit Venue Church After Confronting Pastor With Allegations of Affair, Misconduct

Dec 23, 2021
by Leonardo Blair

At least eight employees of Venue Church, a fast-growing congregation based in Chattanooga, Tennessee, have reportedly quit their jobs over alleged misconduct by Pastor Tavner Smith, who is allegedly shown kissing a woman who is not his wife in a video that recently surfaced online.

Last Friday afternoon, staff and volunteers confronted Smith about the video recorded in North Georgia, The Chattanooga Times Free Press reported.

Two former employees and four volunteers or members previously connected to the church told the newspaper that the eight employees quit after confronting the pastor about a rumored affair with a church employee.

Continue reading “Staffers Quit Venue Church After Confronting Pastor With Allegations of Affair, Misconduct by L. Blair”

Rebuttal to, Or Observations About, the Kerwin Holmes Jr. Editorial “On Finding ‘The One:’ Another Correction on Christian Teaching Concerning Romance”

Rebuttal to, Or Observations About, the Kerwin Holmes Jr. Editorial “On Finding ‘The One:’ Another Correction on Christian Teaching Concerning Romance”

The following post has been edited after publication to fix typing mistakes or to add more commentary.


I will be commenting on this editorial about singleness and marriage on The Christian Post:

(Link): On finding ‘the one:’ Another correction on Christian teaching concerning romance by Kerwin Holmes Jr

That post as linked to on The Christian Post’s Facebook page:

(Link): On Finding The One – post on Facebook Page

This guy’s editorial is written in an odd way, so I’m having to go back and re-read it to just to try and comprehend some of the points he’s making.

Maybe I am totally wrong about this, but my impression is that Holmes is either in his 20s at this time, or in his 30s.
(Wait until he’s in his 40s or older and STILL single.  If Holmes still has not married by age 40 or older, his views on these matters will likely shift in time, thanks to good old life experience.) kermitTyping

Also distracting: his first name, Kerwin, reminds me of Kermit the Frog, so I unintentionally keep visualizing Kermit sitting at a keyboard typing this editorial I am reading. (That is not intended to be an ad hominem, just a random aside.)

At the beginning of Holmes’ editorial, he tells readers to view or read dating advice articles or videos by Christian pastors or personalities that he agrees with, such as the works by Reformed pastors or personalities in general and Voddie Baucham in particular .

Let me stop him right there.

I spent years following Christian dating advice (stuff I read or heard in the 1980s and 1990s, advice by and from standard, run- of- the- mill conservative Baptist or evangelical Christians), and none of that smelly, stupid advice ever actually helped me to marry, though I had wanted to be married for many years (I am currently in my 50s and still single). 

As a matter of fact, a lot of Christian dating advice, even the advice by conservative Christians, is counter-productive and actually plays a role in keeping single adults single (this includes, and is not limited to, the “be equally yoked” rule).

Continue reading “Rebuttal to, Or Observations About, the Kerwin Holmes Jr. Editorial “On Finding ‘The One:’ Another Correction on Christian Teaching Concerning Romance””

Convicted Sex Offender on the Run for 20 Years Found Living New Life as Pastor, or “Musical Minister,” in Alabama

Convicted Sex Offender on the Run for 20 Years Found Living New Life as Pastor, or “Musical Minister,” in Alabama

My parents used to tell me as I was growing up that church is a better place for single adults who’d like to marry to go “spouse-hunting” than other places, especially bars or night clubs.

I can see how maybe that was true in the past, but these days, I’m not so sure.

I don’t know or care if this bogus, sex offending pastor or minister mentioned was a “true” Christian or not; the point is, a lot of his church mates assumed he was a real-deal Christian.

So, could you imagine if you are a single, Christian woman, and he was single, you walk into this guy’s church, and you may just assume this guy is safe to date or marry?

Especially for those of you single, Christian ladies who are way too beholden to the “equally yoked” teaching.

If you’re a single, Christian woman who’d like to be married one day, you really need to get rid of the “equally yoked” teaching in regards to whom you choose to date or marry, as it will increase your dating odds if you get rid of following that rule.

If you insist on limiting yourself to dating only self-professed Christian men, you could end up dating or marrying a self-professing Christian man who by all appearances seems to be a devout Christian but who ends up being a child rapist, like the pastor in this news story below.

You may as well ditch that dippy, stupid rule and judge men by their behavior, not by what religion they claim to follow.

(Link): Fugitive sex offender caught working at Alabama church after 20 years on the run

A convicted sex offender who spent 20 years on the lam was busted in Alabama — where he’d been working at a church for a decade, authorities said.

Larry Albert Flake, 75, was nabbed Friday in Birmingham, where FBI officials said he was living under an assumed name, Larry White, and was known to locals as Rev. White, FBI spokesman Paul Daymond told AL.com.

Officials at the Evergreen True House of Prayer Missionary Baptist Church told the outlet Flake was a minister of music and not a pastor.

Continue reading “Convicted Sex Offender on the Run for 20 Years Found Living New Life as Pastor, or “Musical Minister,” in Alabama”

Pastor Tells Men: “The Best Person to Rape is Your Wife” by Sarah Einselen

Pastor Tells Men: “The Best Person to Rape is Your Wife” by Sarah Einselen

(Update Below)

Another indication of why single, Christian women especially should never, ever take any type of dating advice by Christians…
Because if Christian pastors are teaching it’s acceptable for married men to rape their wives, you can feel sure in assuming such men and their churches or denominations won’t have YOUR best interests at heart if you are a single woman. 

You – if you are a woman, whether you are married or single – need to look out for you and not expect to get loving, wise counsel from such sexist douche waffles, like this male pastor, who always prioritize the feelings and needs of men above that of women.

Contrary to what this guy is teaching, yes ladies, you are your own; you have a right to have boundaries. Here we go again with patriarchal, complementarian Christian men assuming that Codependent relationship habits for women are “biblical,” though the God of the Bible frowns on Codependent behavior in EITHER biological sex (men or women).

Also, the “equally yoked” rule is bunk. If you’re a single, Christian woman, don’t limit yourself to only dating Christian men – because some of these self-professing Christian men are dirt bags who have no regard for women; you’d be better off dating and marrying an ethical, loving NON-Christian man than a dirt-bag Christian one who thinks it’s acceptable for a husband to rape his own wife.

(Link): Pastor Tells Men: “The Best Person to Rape is Your Wife” by Sarah Einselen

Nov 22, 2021

A New York pastor recently told men in a video clip posted on YouTube that “the best person to rape is your wife.”

The pastor, Dr. Burnett L. Robinson, is senior pastor of (Link): Grand Concourse Seventh-Day Adventist Temple in New York City. And in the clip, Robinson urges womento submit to their husbands and tells them, “In this matter of submission, I want you to know up front, ladies, that once you get married, you are no longer your own. You are your husband’s!”

Robinson then expresses dismay that a woman can sue her husband for rape and states, “I would say to you, gentlemen, the best person to rape is your wife.”

The video was posted by Sarah McDugal, an advocate and abuse recovery coach.

(link to You Tube video: Pastor Promotes Rape & Abuse from the Pulpit)

But the doctrine he preached is common in some fundamentalist evangelical circles, too.

Continue reading “Pastor Tells Men: “The Best Person to Rape is Your Wife” by Sarah Einselen”

Rampant Sexual Abuse of Women, and Its Cover Up, at Hope Community Church, Gives Single Christians Another Reason to Be Leery of the Be Equally Yoked Rule or Looking for a Spouse at a Church

Rampant Sexual Abuse of Women, and Its Cover Up, at Hope Community Church, Gives Single Christians Another Reason to Be Leery of the Be Equally Yoked Rule or Looking for a Spouse at a Church

The following article needs to be read in full, because, among other things, one learns that the church staff of the church discussed victim-blamed a teen-aged girl for wearing shorts as the reason as to why a male hired by the church sexually assaulted her.

What I wanted to focus on in this article, however, were the comments the single women made about this church.

Remember as you are reading this, that many Christians will advise you, if you are a single woman who’d like to marry, to try finding “husband material” at your local church.

Also remember as you read this, that a lot of Christians still push the spinster-making teaching of “be equally yoked” in regards to dating or marriage. (It’s a Christian view that holds that a Christian single should not date or marry any Non-Christians.)

(Link): Women Came to Hope Community Church Looking for Fellowship and Healing. Disrespectful Behavior from Church Leaders Drove Them to Leave.

Excerpts:

Feb 10, 2021
by Katie Jane Fernelius

…As members of Hope Community Church streamed in for services, the protesters held signs confronting Hope’s leadership on its record of handling sexual abuse and assault.

Over the last few months, the INDY has worked to vet these allegations and the church’s response to them.

Unfortunately, church leaders, including founder and lead pastor Mike Lee, have not responded to multiple inquiries, effectively stonewalling the INDY’s reporting around a fraught topic.

Sara Dye, who joined the megachurch looking for healing after she was raped by a stranger and went through a divorce, says she was assaulted by a member of the church’s worship team.

Continue reading “Rampant Sexual Abuse of Women, and Its Cover Up, at Hope Community Church, Gives Single Christians Another Reason to Be Leery of the Be Equally Yoked Rule or Looking for a Spouse at a Church”