Teacher Reveals How a Man She Was Polite to at a Restaurant STALKED Her for THREE MONTHS
This has been a big problem in my life, and I’m sure many other women have encountered the same issue: your friendliness or mere politeness is often mistaken by men for flirtation, or is taken advantage of by super desperate, socially awkward men.
I’ve discussed before my 3 plus decades of having a super sweet, codependent nature. Additionally, as far back as my pre-teen years, I was the girl who felt sorry for the odd-ball kids who sat by themselves in the cafeteria at lunch, so though I was pretty shy myself, I’d occasionally say a few kind words to some of those types of kids. Some of them were boys, and frequently, they’d mistake my kindness for flirtation and start acting flirty with me and following me around.
All of that, as well as my openness when discussing my own issues at times on blogs like this one, has made me an attractive target to mentally damaged, depressed, or covert narcissistic people who approach me online and start to cling to me to get their emotional needs met. It’s exhausting and can be creepy depending on how stalker-ish and insistent the person is.
I’ve since learned to be assertive, have boundaries, and be more careful about who I allow into my life.
Anyway, a lot of men out there – of all ages – need to understand that just because a woman is being polite to you, being friendly, or making platonic, pleasant conversation, does NOT necessarily mean she is interested in you romantically or that she wants to date you, so stop creeping women out with your behavior!
If you’re interested romantically in the woman, be straight up and tell her so, and ask her if you can take her out to dinner or a coffee or a movie some time, and if she says no, or appears uninterested, then back off.
(Link): Teacher reveals how a man she was polite to at a restaurant STALKED her for THREE MONTHS, saying he tracked down her email and showed up at her school claiming to be an ‘old friend’
Jan. 13, 2023
A woman has opened up about how she was stalked by a random man for three months after being polite to him in a restaurant, saying he showed up at her workplace twice claiming to be an ‘old friend.’
Patty Brem, 44, from California, shared her terrifying story on Twitter last month as a warning to both men and women. The teacher explained that the stranger tracked her down after she naively told him what high school she worked at.
‘This experience has forever changed how I will act with strangers,’ she told BuzzFeed. ‘I will never give out personal information, even if it seems innocent. I feel like I will always have my guard up from here on out, rather than willingly being friendly.’
In her series of tweets, she recalled how she met the man at a salsa bar nearly two hours away from her house and had a polite yet brief conversation with him.
‘He asked where I was from and what I did for work and I told him. He was familiar with the city I live in and asked which school I taught at, so I mentioned the name,’ she wrote. ‘Turns out, he was familiar and refs some of my school’s football games.’
Brem said she told him to ‘have a good night’ before she sat down to have dinner with her sister, who later noticed the guy checking her out. He and his friend ended up sitting at the table next to theirs.
They made polite conversation and exchanged first names before they finished their dinner and drove home.
‘A couple of weeks go by and I get an email in my WORK inbox from the dude asking me to go out sometime,’ she shared. ‘I never gave him my email address, number, or even my last name. I am slightly creeped out, but don’t reply, delete, and move on with my life.’
Brem received another email from him a few weeks later. This time, he said that he had recently refereed one of her school’s games and was ‘bummed’ she wasn’t there.
Once again, she deleted his email without replying because she didn’t want to encourage him.
On December 13, she was having a conversation with her principal and vice principal when the school administrator came in and said her ‘old friend’ was at the school and wanted to ‘say hi’ to her.
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