They Put Their Faith in a God-Fearing Man Selling Them Tiny Homes. Now They’re Suing Him For Fraud – Christians: Please Learn the Red Flags, Research Cluster B Personality Disorders

They Put Their Faith in a God-Fearing Man Selling Them Tiny Homes. Now They’re Suing Him For Fraud – Christians: Please Learn the Red Flags, Research Cluster B Personality Disorders

Before I get to the links way below about a self-professing, devout Christian man who was allegedly swindling customers out of their very expensive purchases:

For any of you super trusting people out there – especially if you consider yourself kind, decent, empathetic and/or a Christian (though what I say below is also applicable to kind-hearted Non-Christians as well):

Please, please educate yourselves and accept reality.

There ARE people out there with what are called “Cluster B” personality disorders (such as NPD, malignant narcissism, or, they’re on the narcissism spectrum, or they are sociopathic or psychopathic) who cannot, or will not, have empathy (and on top of an empathy-deficit, sociopaths lack a conscience, too).

Not all of these Cluster B personality disordered persons are serial killers, as is often assumed(*) – but they all lack remorse and empathy and will use and abuse those in their paths, even their own spouses and family members! (*Some Cluster B personality disordered persons love to financially scam other people or financially exploit them, for instance.)

The primary drivers and motivations of Cluster B persons are control and dominance of other people.

These people can be your neighbor, sibling, parent, spouse, a friend, your boss, or a co-worker.

These dangerous persons can work as church pastors, doctors, school teachers, veterinarians, psychologists, therapists, plumbers, IT professionals, UPS delivery persons, mailmen, hair stylists – any and every occupation, even “care based,” charity based, or church ministry related ones!

These people have learned to “pass” as normal. They will pretend to be normal. Many will act as though they have compassion and empathy for others, but they do not.

Just because someone is working in a care-based occupation doesn’t mean they have empathy and are warm, nurturing, and have your best interest at heart.

Some narcissistic or sociopathic persons who work as therapists or as social workers INTENTIONALLY undermine their patients or others in their care. That’s one reason you must be careful when shopping around for a mental health professional, should you want to see one for treatment.

Some of these personality disordered persons will do things like say they are a “Jesus-follower,” a Christian, they will even volunteer for charity work, attend church regularly, and “play act the part” of loving, devoted Christ follower while simultaneously committing financial fraud (or other sins and crimes) against you or others.

And they do NOT CARE AT ALL how much it hurts your feelings or hurts you financially.

They are not sorry, and they never will be. They do not experience remorse or sorrow for how they hurt others.

Even the non-personality disordered abusive persons out there have very large entitlement attitudes, so their view on relationships is that being mean, lying, nasty, and controlling of or to you is getting THEIR needs met for them, their abusive behavior of you is working well for them, so why bother to care about you and your needs and how YOU are being hurt by them in the process?

They feel they have no reason to change for the better (this is from their perspective).

There is nothing you can do to fix, change, save, or help such persons (even most therapists agree such persons are beyond help or fixing), nor is it your responsibility to fix or change them.

Avoid them as much as possible. No amount of compassion, love, attention, pity, or empathy from you or someone else will change or fix such persons.

No amount of church attendance, Bible reading, or exposure to the Gospel or the teachings of Jesus will heal, change, or fix them.

This includes the marriage context: a wife being “more submissive” or “loving” towards a narcissistic or sociopathic husband will not “heal,” change, or fix the husband and cause him to stop hurting his wife.

Please do some research, and stop allowing people to take advantage of you! Look for the red flags.

Perhaps start out by reading books such as “The Sociopath Next Door” by Stout

(though, caution: in an otherwise very good and educational work, I think she sugar coats her descriptions of narcissism in her book too much – narcissists, especially at the moderate to high end of the spectrum, are essentially watered-down sociopaths, so far as I am concerned,
but, in her book, Stout makes narcissists sound more lovable, redeemable, reachable, and friendly than they actually are,
which contrasts what I’ve read in a lot of research by other mental health professionals and accounts by narcissistic abuse survivors who all specialize in the topic of narcissism),

or “Husband, Liar, Sociopath – How He Lied, Why I Fell for It & the Painful Lessons Learned” by O. N. Ward,
or “Becoming the Narcissist’s Nightmare: How to Devalue and Discard the Narcissist While Supplying Yourself” by Shahida Arabi.

There are many other books – and free online articles and videos – that describe all these issues.

Just because someone claims to be a Christian and acts really sweet, caring, and nice does NOT mean they will NOT abuse you financially, or will not abuse you physically, verbally, or sexually in private.

Because such people do exist, and they will abuse or exploit you.

Stop thinking the best of people, stop being so trusting, stop assuming that because someone talks favorably of Jesus that this must mean they are trust-worthy, and stop giving people third, fourth, and more chances if they’ve already hurt or lied to you twice!

Stop rationalizing their behavior, stop excusing it on the basis they told you they are having a bad day, they’re under stress, or they were abused as a child (whether they were or not still does not excuse their abusive or dishonest behavior).

Such attitudes and behaviors on your part, where you keep forgiving, pitying, trusting, and grant repeated chances and do-overs, is what enables alleged frauds like the guy in the article below to scam you in the first place.

I am not victim blaming anyone who has been abused or targeted by any of these abusers or scammers.

Here is where I am coming from:
I just want to pull my hair out in frustration in particular at how Christians, in their sermons, books, social media, blogs, and their attitudes, frequently encourage or pressure behaviors or attitudes in believers that encourage them to be very susceptible to attracting abusive people or con artists, or from eliminating them from their lives once they encounter them.

Christians are setting other Christians up to be attractive and easy targets and prey for sociopaths, narcissists, and other troubled and dangerous people.

Misguided Christian teachings about grace, forgiveness, compassion, helping one’s neighbor, turning the cheek, the “no divorce for any reason” teachings, and giving second chances, and Christian complementarians especially are really bad about this.

Christian gender complementarians promote “gender complementarianism,” where they strongly condition girls and women to adopt beliefs and actions that are indistinguishable from Codependency (ie, which includes things like lacking boundaries, being passive, etc), which makes girls and women reluctant to engage in perfectly healthy and normal actions, such as standing up to abusers or bullying behavior, and leaves them vulnerable from recognizing abusive behavior as being abusive in the first place.

Secular culture of course also re-enforces such harmful beliefs and behaviors in girls and women as well, via traditional gender stereotypes (see the book The Gift of Fear by Gavin de Becker for some examples; research by others has also been done in this area going back years with the same results being shown).

(Link): They Put Their Faith in a God-Fearing Man Selling Them Tiny Homes. Now They’re Suing Him For Fraud

People around the country who have paid Matt Sowash thousands of dollars for the small dwellings after seeing him on TikTok say he never delivered on his promises.

by Sept 20, 2022

By Deon J. Hampton

DENVER — A man who had been convicted of bilking investors out of thousands of dollars and who professed his love for God while selling tiny homes online swindled homebuyers out of their life savings for dwellings that were never delivered, three alleged victims said in lawsuits filed in federal and state courts.

Developer Matt Sowash, founder of the Colorado-based nonprofit Holy Ground Tiny Homes, promoted the small residences on social media, including to his 80,000 TikTok followers, with short videos portraying an upbeat, God-fearing man selling the American Dream — affordable homes with financing and no credit checks.

“For people that can’t pay for a house all at once, we can finance you. Holy Ground Tiny Homes. Get yours today,” Sowash said in one TikTok video.

“Great house, available now, around $45,000 is what this goes for. Come in and take it away,” he said in another video, wearing a T-shirt adorned with “Faith Over Fear.”

Sowash said in an interview that he never set out to take advantage of homebuyers, but he’s not sure he’ll be able to build the 250 homes already paid for, in full or in part.

…A plaintiff in one of three lawsuits filed against Sowash said in an interview that the builder’s persuasiveness and Jesus-loving persona convinced her to part with her hard-earned cash.

“That’s part of what sold me. He’s charming, convincing and I believe in God,” said Clara Virginia Davis, 24, an elementary schoolteacher in upstate New York.

Continue reading “They Put Their Faith in a God-Fearing Man Selling Them Tiny Homes. Now They’re Suing Him For Fraud – Christians: Please Learn the Red Flags, Research Cluster B Personality Disorders”

‘The Right Stuff,’ A Dating App for Conservatives – Liberal Sites Scoffing

‘The Right Stuff,’ A Dating App for Conservatives – Liberal Sites Scoffing

From what I’ve seen of a couple of left leaning sites (and certainly liberals on Twitter), the liberals seem to be rejoicing or mocking the fact that supposedly, newly launched conservative dating app “The Right Stuff” is not attracting many women members.

According to another study or two in the past few months, ALL dating sites, political or no, are struggling to attract women members.

I just did a blog post or two about it around a month ago – for the first time, there are more male users on dating sites and apps than there are female ones, and that goes for all manner of dating apps and sites, not just politically oriented ones.

Here’s at least one blog post I did about it, that mentions that gender imbalance:

(Link): Number of ‘Lonely, Single’ Men is on the Rise as Women with Higher Dating Standards Look for Partners Who are ‘Emotionally Available, Good Communicators, and Share Similar Values’, Says Psychologist

I’m puzzled by liberal joy at this perceived conservative dating site failure, as liberals say they hate conservatives, would never date one, and they also hypocritically bitch and moan about dating standards – for example, a lot of blue-haired, unattractive fat male and female progressives scream and yell about how skinny people should be forced to date them, even if skinny people find obesity a turn-off.

I would think that liberals would want conservatives to silo themselves into their own dating sites so that they, the liberals, wouldn’t have to be confronted by conservatives on dating sites.

There are single, conservative women out there – I am one of them – but one problem is that there are already too many dating sites. I joined a couple of them years ago – very well known, mainstream dating sites – and as I already belong to two or three, I have no interest in joining ten more. I think that may be playing a role in why new dating sites are having a hard time attracting new members.

While I myself am a conservative, I do not support sexism,  yet I don’t identify as a feminist (for reasons I shall not enumerate here and now), and it’s been my observation that both liberals and conservatives are sexist.

I would be cautious about using a conservative dating app, because I’ve no doubt that many of the single men on this conservative app adhere to sexist gender stereotypes – as many conservatives do (but again, progressives and liberals engage in their own type of sexism, too) and belief in traditional gender roles is associated with male entitlement and abusive behavior – so no thank you! I would be hesitant to use this dating app for that reason.

Beyond that, I don’t care if the men on this app are conservative, Republican, or if they vote Republican.

I’m fine with that in so far as it goes, but as I said, many conservative men unfortunately equate rejecting  feminism and “woke,” progressive ideology with the 180 degree opposite, equally obnoxious, awful, and wrong world view of supporting sexism against women vis a vis gender role stereotypes – as in, toxic femininity for women (which amounts to people pleasing and codependency) and toxic masculinity for men (which includes narcissistic abuse and entitled attitudes).

(Link):  The Right Stuff, a dating app for conservatives, launches this fall

Aug 15, 2022
These days, there’s a dating app for everyone, from farmers to parents to goths. Another one being thrown in the mix hopes to help you find your Mr. or Mrs. “Right” — a conservative, right-leaning partner, that is.

The Right Stuff is a new dating app for conservatives only, co-founded by John McEntee, Daniel Huff and Isaac Stalzer, three former Trump administration officials. The app is backed by PayPal co-founder Peter Thiel.

The site will launch in September and is free to join, but will be invite-only à la Clubhouse style (if you remember the social audio app’s craze mid-pandemic). This means you can’t join unless you know someone who’s already a member and they send you an invite. The invite list is limitless, though.

Continue reading “‘The Right Stuff,’ A Dating App for Conservatives – Liberal Sites Scoffing”

Dad Lets Daughter Drown in Dubai So She’s Not ‘Dishonored’ by Male Lifeguards

Dad Lets Daughter Drown in Dubai So She’s Not ‘Dishonored’ by Male Lifeguards

Before I even skim articles about this, I can only assume the father in question is a Muslim, though I can see some idiotic American Christian patriarchalists and complementarians finding this a tempting thing to do.

Muslims – like Christian complementarians – have some very backwards, sexist ideals about how they think women ought to live life and behave, especially in regards to clothing or whom they date and marry, or if they marry at all.

This news story was first published in 2015, but I didn’t see it until 2022, not that I remember.

(Link): Dubai Drowning: Dad Lets Daughter Die Rather Than Be Saved by ‘Strange’ Man

(Link): Man let daughter drown rather than have strange men touch her, Dubai police claim

(Link): Dad lets daughter drown in Dubai so she’s not ‘dishonored’ by male lifeguards’ touch: report

by David Harding
August 9, 2015

The father of a 20-year-old woman let her drown in Dubai rather than let lifeguards rescue her.

The father preferred she drown rather than be dishonored by getting touched by male rescuers, reports Emirates 24 News.

Lt. Col. Ahmed Burqibah, deputy director of the Dubai police’s search and rescue team, confirmed the incident happened.

Continue reading “Dad Lets Daughter Drown in Dubai So She’s Not ‘Dishonored’ by Male Lifeguards”

I Hate Looking After Ill People So I’m Removing ‘In Sickness’ From My Wedding Vows – via AITA and The Sun 

I Hate Looking After Ill People So I’m Removing ‘In Sickness’ From My Wedding Vows – via AITA and The Sun 

This one below is a tough one.  My opinion sometimes goes one way and then the other on this subject whenever I see it turn up every so often in advice columns.

I don’t think it’s as clear cut as some of the people screaming at this lady think it is.

I was a caretaker for one of my dying family members for over a year, and it was physically and mentally draining – no, I wouldn’t want to repeat that, either, not with a spouse or someone else, so I can understand where this woman is coming from.

I am also a recovered codependent, and in the 35 or so years I was a codependent, I ran around ignoring my own needs to take care of other people – and I don’t just mean in caring for physically ill people, and driving car-less neighbors to doctor’s appointments and things like that – but I frequently listened to troubled friends, co-workers and family complain for hours over YEARS about the same problems repeatedly.

It is draining to be a constant care-taker for people, whether it’s caring for a physically ill and dying person, or providing a lot of Emotional Labor for negative or depressed friends and family.

So I don’t know if I can totally view the woman in the post below as being a selfish person. She already cared for one of her sick parents for years, and she understandably doesn’t want to re-live that with a spouse, should the spouse develop a chronic health condition.

But then, I can also see how, at first glance her position does come across as grating.

I wonder how much sexism plays a role in this – American culture expects that women will be care-takers and nurturers, where-as men are not expected to take on that role.

(Link): I hate looking after ill people so I’m removing ‘in sickness’ from my wedding vows

Along with the big white dress and booze-up with friends, the most important part of any wedding is seeing two people commit to each other for the rest of their lives.

Although plenty of couples opt for personal vows to express their love, the most important moment of any ceremony is arguably the bit where they declare to look after one another “in sickness and in health”.

But one bride-to-be has caused uproar online after she explained why she wants to remove this important line on her big day.

Posting on Reddit’s “Am I The A—-le” forum, the woman said she wants to replace “in sickness” with “in happiness”.

She explained: “This is harsh, but I hate taking care of sick people.

“My siblings and I were always taking care of our parents whenever they get sick and I just hate it.

“I’m sick of it and I hate feeling bound or obligated to take care of somebody.

Continue reading “I Hate Looking After Ill People So I’m Removing ‘In Sickness’ From My Wedding Vows – via AITA and The Sun “

Sex Dolls, Robots, and Woman Hating – a Conversation with Author Caitlin Roper (video and other, related material – similar to what Christian Gender Complementarians Teach About Women and Sex)

Sex Dolls, Robots, and Woman Hating – a Conversation with Author Caitlin Roper (video and other, related material – similar to what Christian Gender Complementarians Teach About Women and Sex)

The interview (in the video below) also discusses “pedophile activists” and pedophiles who want “sex dolls” that look like little girls.

There is something terribly, horribly wrong going on with men … and women and feminism are not to blame. And patriarchy and enforced traditional gender roles is not the solution, either (I say this as a conservative).

A lot of what Roper mentions about sex in some of the pieces below (especially this one on ABC) sounds very much like the usual attitude by many complementarian Christian men, such as Doug Wilson
– a lot of complementarian and pro-patriarchal “Christian” men –
continue to falsely teach in their books, blogs, sermons, videos, and pod casts that all men have a need for sex, men are incapable of sexual self control (in distinct contradiction to Galatians 5:22-23, 2 Timothy 1:7, etc), that women are obligated to have sex with men whenever men want sex (especially married women).

On Barnes and Noble:

(Link):  Sex Dolls, Robots and Woman Hating: The Case for Resistance

(Link): Pleasure machines: What sex robots tell us about men and sex

Excerpts:

by Caitlin Roper
December 2017

… The growing popularity of sex robots raises many ethical issues, but it also forces us to ask questions about the very nature of sex.

What is sex? What is it for? Is it merely the “acquisition of pleasure” as Robert Jensen put it, a mechanism for orgasm, or is it something one experiences with another person?

While it’s true that sex does not necessarily involve intimacy or meaningful connection, and it’s certainly not always mutually beneficial – mutuality is a key factor. Sexual relations without mutuality might be more appropriately described as sexual exploitation.

… Some men express their preferences for sex robots over relationships, which require catering to someone else’s needs and “needless drama.” Others, despite being married or in committed relationships, prefer their dolls to their living female partners, who unlike dolls are complex human beings with their own interests, feelings and lives.

Dolls, on the other hand, have no expectation of an equal or mutually beneficial partnership, have no needs to be met and no free will to be exercised.

It is precisely the dolls’ complete lack of autonomy that is the key attraction for many men. “You ALWAYS have their full attention,” said one. “It’s just nice to know that there is someone home waiting on me without the bitching … She can’t talk [but] at least she looks good sitting there watching TV.”

One owner described the bliss of gaming for hours with his devoted sex doll by his side, something his ex-wife “would only do … for a few mins, then find things to be upset about.”

…But what is it female bodied sex robots are providing? What is the appeal?

Rather than simply “better” sex, sex dolls provide men with the means for more selfish sex – sex that is totally one-sided. It is sex predicated on men’s absolute sexual freedom to dominate and use a woman without limitations.

There is no pressure to perform well, no need to reciprocate, no need to consider the other party’s feelings, enjoyment, discomfort, humiliation or pain.

It is sex with a compliant woman that is all about the user’s sexual fantasies – with a woman who never refuses, who can be used over and over again.

Continue reading “Sex Dolls, Robots, and Woman Hating – a Conversation with Author Caitlin Roper (video and other, related material – similar to what Christian Gender Complementarians Teach About Women and Sex)”

Woman Says Why She’s Rejecting These ‘Lonely, Single Men’ – also: Male Entitlement In and Out of the Church, Men Who Won’t Take Personal Responsibility for Their Singleness

Woman Says Why She’s Rejecting These ‘Lonely, Single Men’ – also: Male Entitlement In and Out of the Church, Men Who Won’t Take Personal Responsibility for Their Singleness

Below this article, I have a lot of comments, before I resume with providing another link related to this first one:

(Link): Woman says why she’s rejecting these ‘lonely, single men’

Aug 18, 2022
By Jana Hocking, News.com.au

Unless you were hiding under a rock this week, you would have read about an article published on Psychology Today titled “The Rise of Lonely, Single Men.”

It was written by psychologist, Greg Matos, and revealed that dating opportunities for heterosexual men are diminishing as relationship standards rise.

The psychologist explained that women are now only dating men who share the same values, have great communication skills and are emotionally available. Praise the lord!

Toxic men are out, respectful studs are in.

Now first of all, may we get out our violins and play a sad melody for the men who have treated women like absolute rubbish and then realized that they’re now single and alone. How unfair for these poor creatures.

You see, while they were bed-hopping, ghosting, breadcrumbing and doing all sort of mind f–kery to us women folk, we were quietly, and subtly embracing this ‘self love’ culture that started to emerge in TED Talks, TikTok videos, YouTube channels, and various other online forms.

Oprah preached: “If you feel like he is stringing you along, then he probably is. Don’t stay because you think ‘it will get better’. You’ll be mad at yourself a year later for staying when things are not better.”

Continue reading “Woman Says Why She’s Rejecting These ‘Lonely, Single Men’ – also: Male Entitlement In and Out of the Church, Men Who Won’t Take Personal Responsibility for Their Singleness”

“Financial Infidelity” Is When A Person Hides or Withholds Money-Related Issues and Decisions from Their Partner

“Financial Infidelity” Is When A Person Hides or Withholds Money-Related Issues and Decisions from Their Partner

Abuse comes in different types, not just in the physical form – abuse can be emotional, verbal, relational, sexual, or financial.

(Link): “Financial infidelity” is when a person hides or withholds money-related issues and decisions from their partner.

While many discuss sexual infidelity as a serious breach of trust, money-related cheating can sink relationships too.

by Arman Khan.
April 18, 2022

Vinod, a 38-year-old writer, believes that for some, love is a luxury and the price you’ve to pay for it could often be crushing. He said he learnt this the hard way when, nearly a decade before gay sex was decriminalised in India, his first boyfriend cheated him off money just because Vinod could not easily break off their relationship for the fear of crushing loneliness.

“He didn’t earn much and used to borrow money from me, which at first I thought was OK,” Vinod told VICE. “At first, he would tell me that he needed the money for commuting, food, buying clothes, paying bills, etc. But with time,  it became a habit for him to borrow without even batting an eyelid. I think somewhere down the line I got him used to it as well, which I shouldn’t have.”

Vinod would keep a note of how much money he was lending but when he started noticing how his boyfriend’s wallet would never emerge from his pocket, he started asking him where the money he lent him actually went.

Continue reading ““Financial Infidelity” Is When A Person Hides or Withholds Money-Related Issues and Decisions from Their Partner”

The Obnoxious Abuse Survivor Community Is Targeting Julie Roys Again – this time begun by R L Stollar

The Obnoxious Abuse Survivor Community Is Targeting Julie Roys Again – this time the witch hunt was begun by R L Stollar

The “abuse survivor community” has taken their pitchforks out again, and again their pitchforks and torches are for journalist Julie Roys.

This time, the bullying is being carried out by a R L Stollar, a name I’ve seen on twitter off and on in the last few years.

I believe he originally began speaking out against harms caused by Christian homeschooling? Good on him for that (I mean that, that was not snark).

Beyond that, though, I’m not familiar with Stollar. He may have even tweeted a few things in the past I saw shared by others I follow on Twitter that I agreed with.

To Julie Anne (“Defend the Sheep” on twitter) – why are you  participating in this continued pile on?

(Edit: I believe Julie Anne “Liked” some of the comments in that thread, or I saw her share it on her Twitter account, which is how I became aware of it in the first place)

Why are you, Julie Anne, continuing to associate with people who behave this way?
I’m sorry if you feel that Roys did not credit you or friends of yours or whatever on older reportage she did (which she tried to discuss with you), but what is the deal with cozying up to the people singling her out every few weeks?

Anyway. Roys is being bullied online again, and this time it was started by Stollar.

Yes, I said “again” – see (Link): my previous post about this weird, disturbing anti-Roys obsession from the Amy Smiths, Ashley Easters, and other so-called abuse survivor advocates.

If you take note of this obnoxious behavior, as I did, (that is, noting their bullying and mob mentality where they target someone), some of them will erroneously misconstrue you as being a “Julie Roys Stan,” or use that as an ad hominem against you (see embedded tweets below for more on that).

Birth Control Movie

Now, the “abuse survivor community” is targeting Roys for having once appeared in a several years old (conservative created, I believe) movie about birth control and the sexual revolution.

I’ve not seen the movie they are referring to, but I did watch and listen to a clip of Roys presumably from the film (that clip located in a tweet by someone else here), and the comments Roys made were pretty conventional.

There was  nothing “far out” there by Roys in that clip, not unless, I suppose, you’re operating from a faulty, far left liberal paradigm, in which case pointing out that sexual behaviors with little- to- no boundaries can result in things like disease or other harmful ramifications will sound judgmental, fuddy duddy, and stodgy.

Speaking of which:

(Link): Monkeypox virus could become entrenched as new STD in the US – via ABC News (warning: auto-playing video file with audio on that page)

Excerpts:

The spread of monkeypox in the U.S. could represent the dawn of a new sexually transmitted disease, though some health officials say the virus that causes pimple-like bumps might yet be contained before it gets firmly established

By Mike Stobbe AP Medical Writer
July 22, 2022

… So far, more than 2,800 U.S. cases have been reported as part of an international outbreak that emerged two months ago. About 99% have been men who reported having sex with other men, health officials say.
— end excerpts —

Secular Criticisms of Birth Control and the Sexual Revolution

In the past year, a few secular books criticizing the consequences of the sexual revolution (including the role of the advent of birth control pills) have been published
(which I’ve blogged about here (Where the Sexual Revolution Went Wrong by Maria Albano) and here (The Sexual Revolution Has Backfired on Women by S. Moore),
so it’s not only those evangelicals all you hipster “Exvangelicals” despise pointing out the flaws and dangers with no-holds-barred sexual behavior.

In the past few years, more and more liberals and feminists have been speaking out about the excesses and harms of loose sexual behavior; these are just a couple of examples on my blog:

(Link): Why Sex-Positive Feminism is Falling Out of Fashion by S. Greenberg – excerpts via New York Times

(Link): Did Hell Freeze Over?: Liberal Rag Promotes Idea that Celibacy is Acceptable, and a Valid Life Choice / Re: 2016 Study Says Millennials Aren’t Having Much Sex

Progressives / Abuse Advocates Define Christianity to = Democrat Party, Progressive Values and Views

Many of the abuse advocates under consideration in this blog post I am discussing are politically driven (or some have left-leaning sympathies).

They conflate Christianity with leftism, progressive views, causes, and the Democratic Party, and reject anyone who doesn’t agree with all their socio-political views.

Here is my reaction to what got the ball rolling (tweet link – my comment – and here is a link to the original R L Stollar comment I was replying to):

Link to Tweet embedded below.

So this Stollar guy initially did a tweet with a link to this page (also linked to below, with excerpt) at Right Wing Watch – of course he did.

Does Stollar ever follow sites with names like “Left Wing Watch” (i.e., any accounts that are critical of progressive ideology?) – probably not.

Continue reading “The Obnoxious Abuse Survivor Community Is Targeting Julie Roys Again – this time begun by R L Stollar”

Victim Blaming Codependents, or Victim Blaming People Who Exhibit Codependent Behaviors

Victim Blaming Codependents or Victim Blaming People Who Exhibit Codependent Behaviors

The concept of Codependency is not victim-blaming.

The concept of Codependency does not pathologize domestic abuse survivors,  targets of narcissistic abuse, or other victims of other types of abuse, contrary to a lot of online rhetoric I have seen, and I don’t care what psychiatrist with what degree behind his name has stated things like, “Codependency is victim blaming and pathologizing!” – that psychiatrist, despite his eight years in medical school, is wrong.

He is wrong, wrong, wrong, and wrong.

I disagree with him entirely. And I do not have to have a medical degree to see where he’s wrong, and to know that he’s wrong.

I am a recovered codependent, and I remain astounded at people, especially therapists, psychologists, and abuse survivor advocates, who should know better, who never-the-less keep peddling this trope that the concept of Codependency is victim blaming, or it’s too broad in scope to be of much use.

(There are actually other mental health professionals out there who do not believe that Codependency is useless, too broad, or that it pathologizes anyone.)

A few months ago, when news stories about Anna Duggar were more prominent – she’s married to convicted child pornography user Josh Duggar, former reality television show star
– and then, a little later, when so-called abuse survivor advocates, such as Ashley Easter started commenting on that and victim blaming Anna Dugggar, and Amy Smith of Watchkeep began attacking journalist Julie Roys, I kept seeing these people, and others who follow them, showcase a very stunning misunderstanding of, or in some cases, a lack of awareness of, Codependency.

I may in the future do more posts – ones specific to Ashley Easter, Anna Duggar, and the Amy Smith – Julie Roys fiasco from months back – but for this post, I wanted to address this topic via at least two videos I saw on Dr. Ramani’s You Tube Channel.

Dr. Ramani is a psychologist who specializes in treating victims of narcissistic abuse.

I actually like Dr. Ramani quite a bit, and I’ve seen and listened to many of her videos. I like her on a personal level, and I think she’s quite astute.

I do  not feel comfortable being critical of someone who I usually agree with often, and who I find to be personable, but Dr. Ramani made a few comments in some of her videos here and there, pertaining to codependency, which I didn’t entirely agree with.

And no, I myself do not have to be a psychologist or have a mental health degree to form opinions or conclusions based upon what I hear and see!

While I do not have a mental health degree, I am college educated, and I did spend the past several years researching mental health topics. I did take psychology courses in college, but that is not what I earned my degree in.

So, I may not be an “expert” on mental health topics (in a degreed sense), but I am not an entirely uninformed person.

Continue reading “Victim Blaming Codependents, or Victim Blaming People Who Exhibit Codependent Behaviors”

Tucker Carlson Has the Audacity to Blame All Women for the Actions of a Male Mass Shooter – Which is not “Based”

Tucker Carlson Has the Audacity to Blame All Women for the Actions of a Male Mass Shooter – Which is not “Based”

Robert Crimo III, the Highland Park (July 4th) mass shooter, is to blame for Robert Crimo III’s actions.

One can possibly argue Crimo’s parents played a role in matters, as they helped him obtain one or  more of his weapons. But in the end scheme of things, Crimo is responsible for Crimo’s choices and Crimo’s actions.

The fact remains that women are not to blame for Robert Crimo III’s shooting spree, where he killed seven individuals at a July 4th (Independence Day holiday, 2022) parade in Illinois.

Contrary to what some liberals have been saying, who’ve been claiming that Crimo was a “MAGA supporter,”
it is not clear at this time what Crimo’s political beliefs are (he was photographed at a Trump rally, but some were saying he mocked Trump supporters, that he was not showing up to the rally to support Trump),
nor is it clear if any political views motivated his shooting spree.

Others found that Crimo followed a lot of Democrats on his social media and voiced some support for Democrat or progressive views. sexismNotBased_Removed

I will include either tweets with videos of the Tucker Carlson segment under discussion and/or embed much farther below, videos from You Tube, where you can see and hear for yourself Carlson blaming not only women for Crimo’s actions, but also, weirdly, video games and several other factors.

Please note that some of the videos or tweets I embed in this post may not necessarily be from sources I agree with on every point. It’s usually left-leaning content providers who will hold guys like Carlson accountable for his unhinged, unfounded sexist comments against women.

I’m a conservative, but I rarely see other conservatives calling out sexism when it’s bandied about by other conservatives.

I have never identified as a feminist, but I do not blame all feminists or feminism for the July 4th shooting.

Story Background / Summaries

Here’s some background and/or descriptions about the situation:

(Link): Tucker Carlson pins Highland Park shooting on ‘lectures from women on male privilege’ while furious Bill O’Reilly attributes atrocity to ‘minority gangs which, like drug gangs and drug crime, you’ll never stop’

(Link): Tucker Carlson Points Finger At Women And Weed For Latest Mass Shooting

(Link): Tucker Finds a Way to Blame Women for Young Male Mass Shootings

July 5, 2022
by William Vaillancourt

On the heels of yet another mass shooting, Tucker Carlson identified what he believes to be one contributing factor in young men using firearms on innocent bystanders: women “lecturing” them about “their so-called privilege.”

Carlson opened his Tuesday show discussing the shooting at a Fourth of July parade in Highland Park, Illinois, allegedly by 21-year-old Robert “Bobby” Crimo.

The Fox News host mentioned how authorities said Crimo had appeared on their radar twice before: in April 2019 after a suicide attempt and a few months later after he threatened to “kill everyone” in his immediate family.

After the second incident, police confiscated knives, a dagger, and a sword from his home. No complaint was filed, and no arrest was made.

[Carlson said:]
“And yet the authorities in their [the male mass shooters] lives—mostly women—never stop lecturing them about their so-called privilege. ‘You’re male, you’re privileged.’” Carlson imitated. “Imagine that. Try to imagine an unhealthier, unhappier life than that. So a lot of young men in America are going nuts. Are you surprised?”
— end excerpts —

No Motive Given As of July 12, But Tucker, Without Evidence, Listed Motives on July 5

It’s dishonest and inaccurate for Tucker Carlson or any other conservative to blame women as a group or feminism or feminists for the shooting.

As to the date of me composing this post – July 12, 2022 – I have not yet seen a motive for the shooting.

Crimo did not mention that “women in authority” drove him to shoot a group of people.

As far as motive, what we do have is this (from July 6, 2022):

Authorities would not go into Crimo’s possible motive but did acknowledge he “had an affinity for the numbers 4 and 7” — which, when reversed, point to the date he carried out the massacre. (Source)

Even if Crimo were to issue a statement to police tomorrow that he hates women and believes that “women in authority” drove him to shoot and kill several people, that still does not mean that he would be correct, that women are culpable, or that police would magically say,

“Why, you’re right! Women are such nags! It’s totally fine that you felt so nagged by women that you murdered seven people. We will set you free instantly, with no charges pressed, you poor, dear victim  you!”

A lot of liberal women have said for years that conservatives or Republicans are waging a “war against women,” and while I think that rhetoric is fairly untrue (though some conservatives and Republicans do, regrettably, adhere to sexist beliefs),
it sure does not help to dispel liberal paranoia about the extent of conservative (or Republican) sexism when a conservative talk host like Tucker Carlson unjustly accuses women as a group (and without citing any evidence) as being to blame for the actions of a male mass shooter.

Continue reading “Tucker Carlson Has the Audacity to Blame All Women for the Actions of a Male Mass Shooter – Which is not “Based””

First it Was Christian Complementarians Telling Me To Shut Up, Then Trans Activists, and Now, It’s Intersectional Feminist, Black, Pro-Choice Tik Tokers

First it Was Christian Complementarians Telling Me To Shut Up, Then Trans Activists, and Now, It’s Intersectional Feminist, Black, Pro-Choice Tik Tokers

I actually did a post covering similar territory a few weeks ago – I noted in that post how members of the progressive transgender movement constantly tell women to shut up – as did the Christian gender complementarians I grew up with, or whose teachings I was exposed to, as my parents were Southern Baptists, and Baptists push that sexist tripe but claim it’s “biblical.”

I’ve also seen secular (and religious) conservative men either imply all women should shut up, or they suggest that all women should not have the right to vote (I wrote about that here, among other posts I’ve done on the topic)

Now, here we have a black, pro-choice woman on Tik Tok insisting that white women shut up.

I’m part white but also part Native American. I will not shut up. If I have an opinion and want to express it, I will express it.

I don’t allow church, complementarians, progressives, trans activists, pro choicers, or sexist conservatives to silence me or tell me what to do.

(Link): ‘If you value your life…shut the f*** up’: CRAZY MAD TikToker threatens white women over Roe reversal

‘This is what happens when social media gives people who used to take classes in the basement and wear a helmet a platform’

by BlazeTV Staff
June 30, 2022

On the latest episode of “Fearless,” BlazeTV host Jason Whitlock and contributor Shemeka Michelle try to make sense of a very angry TikToker’s racist rant about the Supreme Court’s decision to overturn Roe v. Wade.

“So, we all see what has happened with this Roe v. Wade situation. We already knew this was how it was going to go down,” said the blue-lipped TikToker and self-described “Priestess Warrior.”

“Dear white women, listen. Your only play in this, if you value your life, is to shut the f*** up!” she continued.

Continue reading “First it Was Christian Complementarians Telling Me To Shut Up, Then Trans Activists, and Now, It’s Intersectional Feminist, Black, Pro-Choice Tik Tokers”

Married Father, Mayor of Town, and Prayer Leader of His Church, Arrested for Solicitation of a Child

Married Father, Mayor of Town, and Prayer Leader of His Church, Arrested for Solicitation of a Child

Contrary to what hyper- pro- marriage and hyper- pro- parenthood conservatives will tell you, being a spouse or a parent will not make you more godly, ethical, or loving than being single or childless (or childfree).

Not all self professing Christian men are decent – the guy in the story below is apparently a Christian who was a prayer leader for his men’s group at his church.

You’re better off being married to a  non-child-molesting atheist or other type of Non-Christian than marrying a pedophile Christian man.

(Link):  Source: Pilot Point Mayor Matt McIlravy arrested for online solicitation of a child

DENTON (CBSDFW.COM) – A source told CBS11 reporter JD Miles that Pilot Point’s new mayor, Matt McIlravy was arrested for online solicitation of a child, a second degree felony.

(Link): Texas mayor and teacher Matt McIlravy arrested for soliciting child online

By Jesse O’Neill
June 21, 2022

The mayor of a town in Texas was arrested for online solicitation of a child, a report said.

Pilot Point Mayor Matt McIlravy was charged with a second-degree felony for the offense, according to KTVT-TV.

The mayor, who is also a teacher, was busted by a Dallas Police undercover operation, the station said.mayorMatt2

McIlravy is a married father of two boys that works as a design engineer and also serves as a men’s prayer meeting leaderaccording to his government profile.

Continue reading “Married Father, Mayor of Town, and Prayer Leader of His Church, Arrested for Solicitation of a Child”