The Authors at The Federalist Site Often Don’t Get It: Joy Pullman is Fine With Men Harassing Women Who Wear Headphones In Public – Part 1

The Authors at The Federalist Site Often Don’t Get It: Joy Pullman is Fine With Men Harassing Women Who Wear Headphones in Public – Part 1

I am quoting portions of an essay at The Federalist site in order to offer a rebuttal to it. Link is below.


The Federalist is a conservative web site.

I’m a conservative.

However, I am a conservative who is truly and actually repulsed by sexism against women – and yes, many conservatives will say they are as well – but then they go on to mock and ridicule the very legitimate concerns raised by other women, which means, ultimately, they are supporting and defending sexism despite their avowed concern for women and girls.

Lets’s examine one example of this very thing. From the right wing site The Federalist comes this editorial written by a Joy Pullman:

(Link): Even Women With Headphones May Want A Man To Chase Them

Here is the obnoxious sub-heading on that page, which was published in September 2016:

Back off, uptight whiners, and stop making public and romantic life so much less fun for everyone. Some ladies like a good chase.
–(end quote)–

I’m surprised a woman wrote this piece, because it conveys a lot of the stupidity, the ignorance of women, and wrong, sexist assumptions many men have of women, but this is written by a conservative woman – so maybe I should not be surprised.

A lot of conservative women (I myself am conservative, but please recall, I don’t agree with them on all topics) hold this bizarre and wrong position that the automatic, correct position on any topic pertaining to gender that feminists, or all women as a group (which may or may not include feminists), are championing or upset about, must be to adopt the direct, opposite position.

And that is an incredibly stupid and irresponsible position for conservatives to take, for, like broken clocks, (Link): even liberal feminists are correct at least twice a day.

Continue reading “The Authors at The Federalist Site Often Don’t Get It: Joy Pullman is Fine With Men Harassing Women Who Wear Headphones In Public – Part 1”

The Horrible, Sexist Advice And Attitude Behind the ‘How Do I Approach A Girl With Headphones In?’ Post from the Absolute Ability Blog

The Horrible, Sexist Advice And Attitude Behind the ‘How Do I Approach A Girl With Headphones In?’ Post from the Absolute Ability Blog

I’m not a feminist.

But if you spend so much as ten minutes skimming over articles and blog posts about women, especially ones by feminists, you will discover on posts about what turns women off when, how, and why men approach them, that 99.9% of women, who are publicly using headphones, do not enjoy being approached when they have headphones or earplugs in.

Many women on forums and blogs have quite plainly said that they put on headphones in public precisely to use as a “Do Not Disturb Me” sign, as in, “I don’t want men to chat with me, ask me out, or flirt with me right now. I want to be left alone.” (I have a list of links to such comments, editorials, and blog posts farther below.)

But do the guys at this “Absolute Ability” blog below, which appears to be some kind of dating advice or P.U.A. (pick up artist) type site care about women’s stated preferences and explanations for their behavior?

Why no, they do not.

These men assume they know better than women what women want.

So, the short answer to the question, “How do I approach a girl wearing headphones” is – you do not.

(By the way, I am a woman. You can take my word over what men on a blog have to say about women.)

Do not take a woman wearing headphones as a challenge to overcome. It is not.

Do not view a woman’s “no” as an invitation to keep trying, to keep pestering her. Back off.

One clue that anyone and everyone should avoid taking dating or relationship advice from Tony D, is this Tweet on (Link): Tony’s Twitter (this is his Twitter linked to from his dating advice blog):

(Link): Tweet source (@TonyDAbsolute)

The Tweet by Tony reads:

I was sexually assaulted by Obama in the early, no mid, no early 90’s. Can’t remember when, where, how I got there, how I got back, and none of my friends I named remember it, or remember meeting him. But he’s definitely guilty. #touchedbyObama #BrettKavanaugh
–(end quote)–

Regardless of where one stands politically (I am moderately conservative), it shows a great deal of immaturity and insensitivity, and some sexism, to mock any woman who comes forward to say she was sexually assaulted – and note that Tony is also misusing the “me too” hash tag in his tweet.

Any man who thinks it’s acceptable to ridicule an alleged sexual assault victim, to mock sexual assault of women generally, is not a man to be taking dating advice from.

He clearly does not respect women, and if a man wants more success in dating, and if a man wants a lasting, healthy relationship with a woman, he will have to at a minimum, generally respect women.

Tony is also apparently a (Link): fan of Jordan Peterson, whom despite what his admirers think (and yes, I am familiar with Peterson’s work in context), holds to some sexist ideals and is in favor of traditional gender stereotypes for men and women, many of which elevate men at the expense of women.

Tony also tweeted on his Twitter (link) that

This is why the left is losing, and will continue to. They’re bullies and morons. twitter.com/SourcedReports–(end quote)–

Mmm. Now, I am a right wing woman (and yes I do believe that some liberals some of the time can behave like bullies), but Tony’s blog, from what I recall, does not say he is in the business of helping right wing men approach right wing women.

Well, considering that a lot of women are liberals and vote Democrat, how does Tony expect a man of whatever political persuasion, being able to approach  liberal or Democrat women for a date, when he holds them in such low esteem, and I’m sure that attitude would likely color his dating advice?

Or is Tony D. expecting male readers on his blog to approach only conservative women for dates? And how are those single men going to know which women are conservatives, if they’re not, for instance, wearing a M.A.G.A. ball cap?

Continue reading “The Horrible, Sexist Advice And Attitude Behind the ‘How Do I Approach A Girl With Headphones In?’ Post from the Absolute Ability Blog”

Ex-Evangelicals Admit Their Religion Killed Their Love Lives: I’m ‘Literally Thinking About Hell’ During Sex

Ex-Evangelicals Admit Their Religion Killed Their Love Lives: I’m ‘Literally Thinking About Hell’ During Sex

(Link): Ex-Evangelicals Admit Their Religion Killed Their Love Lives: I’m ‘Literally Thinking About Hell’ During Sex – Raw Story Site

(Link):  ANONYMOUS EX-CHRISTIANS OPEN UP ABOUT THEIR DAMAGED SEX LIVES

Excerpts from Raw Story site:

In a confessional piece on The Feed, ex-evangelicals lamented the oppressive influence their faith had on their sex lives and personal relationships with their partners, saying they were haunted by feelings of guilt and shame.

As pointed out by Hemant Mehta at the Friendly Atheist, former fundamentalist Christian Ruby Bisson (Claire) who writes about Christianity at The Gravity of Guilt, has been compiling stories told her by her readers who detailed not only how their deeply-held religious beliefs crippled their sex lives, but the lingering effects after they lost their religion.

According to one anonymous woman, “I can’t orgasm because I can’t relax. I’m literally thinking about hell. It’s been three years since I left Christianity but I can’t shake the thought that a guy who isn’t a Christian just wants me for my bod and I project that insecurity onto him. This is ultimately what ended my only two relationships.”

She then admitted how she tried to make it work.

“I made him pretend he was religious and didn’t want to have sex,” she explained. “I had to convince him it was a good idea. I made him pray at the end of the bed. Through that role play I was able to be the other person and that power allowed me not to freak out.”

Another former Christain said that she spiraled into a world of pornography at the age of 12, that left her secretly living in “shame and self-hatred.”

Continue reading “Ex-Evangelicals Admit Their Religion Killed Their Love Lives: I’m ‘Literally Thinking About Hell’ During Sex”

Hetero CIS Woman Conned Into Having Sex With Trans-man Who Didn’t Tell Her He was First a She

Hetero CIS Woman Conned Into Having Sex With Trans-man Who Didn’t Tell Her He was First a She

Sounds as though this deviant placed her selfish sexual preferences and desires above the welfare of this other woman in the news story.

I think another thing this news story goes to show is that not only do some men (that is, honest to God men, who were born male) make terrible, selfish, abusive boyfriends, but some women (who try to pass themselves off as male) also make for terrible boyfriends!

(Link): Mum, 30, duped into sex by transgender man, 35, with fake penis says she’ll ‘never trust another man’

Lisa Evans has opened up on how Carlos Delacruz claimed he was self conscious because of burn scars – and demanded romps in the dark while using a ‘blood and flesh’ prosthetic

A MUM duped into sex with a trans lover who used a fake penis told how her life was “torn apart”.

She's a Man, Baby!

Lisa Evans, 30, bedded Carlos Delacruz, 35, unaware the fiend — born female — had no penis.

Delacruz was jailed for the prosthetic attack on her and another partner.

Continue reading “Hetero CIS Woman Conned Into Having Sex With Trans-man Who Didn’t Tell Her He was First a She”

Single People Aren’t Problems to Be Fixed or Threats to Be Neutralized By Ella Hickey

Single People Aren’t Problems to Be Fixed or Threats to Be Neutralized By Ella Hickey

I’ve noted in older posts how terrible Christian advice on the subjects of dating, marriage, and relationships are – if you’d like to see my posts on those subjects, some of them are linked to below, at the bottom of this post under the “Related Posts” section.

By the way, I would ask you to click on this link below to go to the page and read it, but, be sure to scroll to the bottom of the page to read any posts by single adults who leave comments, including one comment by a 60 year old lady with the screen name “janep75_2173,” who has been divorced for 20+ years, on how badly her local church treats her for being single.

(Link): Single People Aren’t Problems to Be Fixed or Threats to Be Neutralized

What’s missing from Christian books on dating, singleness, and purity

Excerpts:

…. [The author discusses having read numerous Christian books about dating, marriage, and relationships when she was a teen-ager]

….Our theology of singleness and the “not-yet-married” has gone unmonitored, unchanged, and unimpressive for too long. Much of it is built on outdated gender roles and unhelpful clichés that don’t apply easily to today’s dating world.

For example, many of these books assume that sexual attraction is the “burden” of men and not something women struggle with.

Or, many of these books assume that men will lead a dating relationship and women will follow. Others encourage men and women to avoid and fear each other to avoid “stumbling.”

Continue reading “Single People Aren’t Problems to Be Fixed or Threats to Be Neutralized By Ella Hickey”

Female Cockroaches Form Squads to Block Male Mating Attempts

Female Cockroaches Form Squads to Block Male Mating Attempts

(Link): Female cockroaches form squads to block male mating attempts

By Hannah Sparks

Ladies have to look out for each other. Even roaches know that.

A new study of Pacific beetle cockroaches in the journal Ethology revealed some surprising feminist tendencies among the insects: In mixed-sex groups, females cluster together to stave off unwanted mating advances from males.

Continue reading “Female Cockroaches Form Squads to Block Male Mating Attempts”

‘Men Are 100% Responsible For Unwanted Pregnancies’ Writes Blogger in Viral Twitter Thread

‘Men Are 100% Responsible For Unwanted Pregnancies’ Writes Blogger in Viral Twitter Thread

(Link): ‘Men are 100% responsible for unwanted pregnancies’ writes blogger in viral Twitter thread

‘Stop trying to control women’s bodies and sexuality’

A blogger from Oakland, California has become a viral sensation after sharing her views on abortion on Twitter, in which she argues that “all unwanted pregnancies are caused by the the irresponsible ejaculations of men”.

Gabrielle Blair, a Mormon and mother-of-six, began her series of tweets by claiming that men have “zero interest in stopping abortion” and are almost entirely responsible for accidental pregnancies.

“Women can only get pregnant about two days each month,” she writes. “And that’s for a limited number of years.

“That makes 24 days a year where a woman might get pregnant. But men can cause pregnancy 365 days a year.

“In fact, if you’re a man who ejaculates multiple times a day, you could cause multiple pregnancies daily. In theory, a man could cause 1000+ unwanted pregnancies in just one year.”

Continue reading “‘Men Are 100% Responsible For Unwanted Pregnancies’ Writes Blogger in Viral Twitter Thread”

Transgender Bathroom Crime Study Misses The Mark – Transgenderism and Women’s Privacy

Transgender Bathroom Crime Study Misses The Mark – Transgenderism and Women’s Privacy

(Link): New “Transgender Bathroom Crime” Study Misses The Mark

Interesting comment at the bottom of the page by Miles Coburn:

What gets me is abortion was greenlit in society on the basis of “penumbras of privacy” on the part of women’s rights. And now, actual privacy concerns are being disregarded.

Now that he mentions it, yes: why do so many liberals insist that a woman should have a right to privacy regarding abortion (and not every woman gets one), but a lot of women use public bathrooms and restrooms, and these same liberals believe that biological women don’t deserve privacy? That a biological man’s rights (a man who thinks he is a woman) trumps a woman’s privacy or right to safety?

Continue reading “Transgender Bathroom Crime Study Misses The Mark – Transgenderism and Women’s Privacy”

Majority of Heterosexuals Say They Won’t Date Trans Folk and That’s Discrimination Somehow – by Brett T.

Majority of Heterosexuals Say They Won’t Date Trans Folk and That’s Discrimination Somehow – by Brett T.

(Link): Majority of Heterosexuals Say They Won’t Date Trans Folk and That’s Discrimination Somehow – by Brett T.

Zhana Vrangalova late last month wrote a piece for Them about the results of a study by two Canadian researchers that showed that the vast majority of cisgender people (those who identify as their biological sex) would not consider dating a trans person, and that is just another example of the discrimination trans people suffer.

Of 958 participants in the study, only 12 percent said they would consider dating a trans woman or trans man.

Continue reading “Majority of Heterosexuals Say They Won’t Date Trans Folk and That’s Discrimination Somehow – by Brett T.”

‘Bachelorette’ Star Shamed For His Virginity Defends Himself

‘Bachelorette’ Star Shamed For His Virginity Defends Himself

Yeah, see, both secular and (Link): Christian culture mocks, de-values, and shames virginity, celibacy, as well as virgin and celibate people.

So, when I see some Christians or (Link): secular feminists rattling on and on about how society supposedly “slut shames” all women for their sexual behavior, I’m not so sure.

Society has even become a tad more tolerant towards asexual adults.

But God help you if you’re an adult who has voluntarily chosen to sexually abstain for whatever the reason, then both secular and Christian culture will mock you, question you, suspect there’s something weird or freaky or repressed about you.

And, people who do sexually abstain are expected to tolerate and accept any and all sexual behavior by others – we’re supposed to be non-judgmental about people who have a lot of casual sex, or who engage in homosexual behavior, or what have you. But no such tolerance is shown to adult virgins or celibates.

This guy should not be shamed for being a virgin.

He should not have to “defend” himself over this.

All you people out there who may be mocking or insulting this guy for his sexuality status can go get bent.

(Link): ‘Bachelorette’ Star Shamed For His Virginity Defends Himself

Colton Underwood, a 26-year-old retired NFL player and ex-boyfriend of Olympian Aly Raisman, has been in the spotlight on the most recent season of the Bachelorette for being the one out-and-proud virgin on the show, and has gotten quite a bit of flack for it.

During Monday night’s “Men tell All” episode, some of the other guys had some particularly nasty comments regarding Underwood’s virginity.

Continue reading “‘Bachelorette’ Star Shamed For His Virginity Defends Himself”

STUDY: Like Females, Males Suffer Melancholy After Sex

STUDY: Like Females, Males Suffer Melancholy After Sex…

(Link): STUDY: Like Females, Males Suffer Melancholy After Sex…

Excerpts:

According to a new paper titled Postcoital Dysphoria: Prevalence and Correlates among Males published in the (Link): Journal of Sex and Marital Therapy, men can and do suffer from Postcoital Dysphoria (PCD).

Symptoms include feelings of sadness, tearfulness or irritability following sex.

While (Link): previous findings show the condition to be common in women, there had been no prior research into whether the same could be said for men, say Masters student Joel Maczkowiack and Professor Robert Schweitzer from Queensland University of Technology’s School of Psychology and Counselling.

“Forty-one per cent of the participants reported experiencing PCD in their lifetime with 20 per cent reporting they had experienced it in the previous four weeks. Up to four per cent suffered from PCD on a regular basis.”

Continue reading “STUDY: Like Females, Males Suffer Melancholy After Sex”

The Dating Swamp: How Finding Love in DC May Be Impossible For Young Trump and GOP Staffers – Liberals Hypocritically Insist You Date Transgender Persons But Not Trump Voters

The Dating Swamp: How Finding Love in DC May Be Impossible For Young Trump and GOP Staffers – Liberals Hypocritically Insist You Date Transgender Persons But Not Trump Voters

(Disclaimer: I personally did not vote for anyone in the 2016 Presidential race, because I did not care for any of the candidates)

Wait. I’m confused.

Most Liberals insist other people date not based on personal preferences but on political correctness.

So, for example, pro-Trans activist Liberals yell and scream at CIS Lesbian women to date Trans women, even though many lesbians have made it clear they prefer to date other CIS (lesbian) women.

But now, liberals are not willing to date Republicans or Trump voters? They will supposedly date, or advocate that others date, people with penises who claim to be women, but they won’t date Republicans or whomever or whatever differing political persuasion? What?

(Link): The Dating Swamp: How Finding Love in DC May Be Impossible For Young Trump and GOP Staffers

Excerpts:

Trying to find love in D.C. can be tricky. If you’re a young Trump administration staffer, it might be near impossible.

GOP employees and other right-wingers have been complaining that dating in one of the most Democratic cities in America is a political minefield.

They’ve been called out, flipped off and told they are personally responsible for the death of democracy.

One 29-year-old lobbyist told Fox News that learning to date in a Trump world is “absolutely insane.”

 “It’s getting so bad,” the lobbyist, who asked to remain anonymous because she works with the administration, said.

Continue reading “The Dating Swamp: How Finding Love in DC May Be Impossible For Young Trump and GOP Staffers – Liberals Hypocritically Insist You Date Transgender Persons But Not Trump Voters”

The Unfortunate Anti-Virginity Fall-Out from Christian Misogynist Lori Alexander’s Wacky “Debt Free Virgins Without Tattoos” Post – The Problem is Not Supporting Virginity, It’s Complementarianism

The Unfortunate Anti-Virginity Fall-Out from Christian Misogynist Lori Alexander’s  Wacky “Debt Free Virgins Without Tattoos” Post – The Problem is Not Supporting Virginity, It’s Complementarianism

Updated:

Lori Alexander has posted this (unhelpful) clarification of her post (about “Debt Free Virgins with Tattoos”) on an ultra-conservative political forum:

(Link): Godly Men Prefer Debt Free Virgins Without Tattoos – by Lori Alexander, on Free Republic

Her new aspect is to add the word “Godly” prior to the word “Men,” as if that makes it less obnoxious or wrong, but it does not.

I used to lurk at the Free Republic site, back in my more conservative days, but I’m not surprised to see most of the posters under Alexander’s post on that site actually agreeing with it.

Of course they do.

I’m still a conservative, but I’m no longer off the reservation about it, as the Freepers are on some things, like on this topic.


The Unfortunate Anti- Virginity Fall Out Due to Lori Alexander’s “Debt Free Virgin” Post

If you’d like more background to this post, and an explanation for who Lori Alexander is, please see my previous post about it here:

(Link): Reflections On Lori Alexander’s Debt Free Virgins Without Tattoos

If you are new to my blog, a recap:

I am over 45 years of age and still a virgin.

I was reserving sexual activity for marriage. I’ve never had sexual intercourse. I was expecting to be married but never found Mr. Right.

I do have a libido.

Contrary to what Christians ASSUME about older virgins, Celibacy, being sexually abstinent for as long as I’ve been, is not “a gift” where God granted it to me and supernaturally removed my libido and makes it easy-breezy to cope with.

For many years, I was dedicated to remaining a virgin until marriage, due to Christian ethics, (these days I’m semi-agnostic), but also due to other reasons as well, which I shall not get into here but have explained in older posts on the blog.

In the last ten or so years, I’ve seen a disturbing trend where secular, liberal feminist views about sex have trickled into liberal Christian corners, where there is much railing against “slut shaming” and there is strong opposition to judging any woman for her sexual behavior or choices.

This trend became so common that these same views, disturbingly, began appearing on liberal Christian blogs and sites, whose progressive, feminist, Christian authors began writing editorials saying virginity is of no import, God only cares about your heart and spiritual purity, and God does not care so much anyone’s sexual behavior, (Link): intact hymen, or sexual past.

This anti- sexual purity thinking (which includes the down-playing, condemning, or mocking of physical virginity and adult celibacy) has even crept into mainstream moderate- to- conservative churches and Christian writing and thinking, unfortunately.

Continue reading “The Unfortunate Anti-Virginity Fall-Out from Christian Misogynist Lori Alexander’s Wacky “Debt Free Virgins Without Tattoos” Post – The Problem is Not Supporting Virginity, It’s Complementarianism”

Singles Discrimination, Complementarianism, Equally Yoked Teaching, and Spotting Predators in Church Video

Singles Discrimination, Complementarianism, Equally Yoked Teaching, and Spotting Predators in Church Video

Someone in a Christian discussion group posted this video (and I don’t want to link to the group or mention it by name, though you may be able to figure out which one it is, especially if you are already familiar with it), and the Christians on the discussion board talked about it:

(Link): When A Predator Shows Up At Your Church — Here’s What You Do!

That same video has also been making the rounds on other Christian blogs, sites, forums, and on Twitter.

The video is around 18 minutes long. I watched it a few days ago.

The video features a Christian woman who says a 50-something guy showed up at her church, a man who set off red flags for her, due to his weird behavior around the kids who were there at the church, including her own.

The man behaved overly-familiar with her kid, other people’s kids who were there, and he ignored the parents of the kids.

(1) First, I’m going to discuss what I believe this video has to do with complementarianism.

(2) Then I am going to discuss some of the disturbing comments about adult singles that were made in the Christian discussion group where I saw this video posted to, and next,

(3) I’ll move on to discussing, as mentioned by a woman or two in the group, about the creepy behavior single adult women have to put up with, even at church, and what this has to do with the Christian “Equally Yoked” teaching.

Continue reading “Singles Discrimination, Complementarianism, Equally Yoked Teaching, and Spotting Predators in Church Video”

Reflections On Lori Alexander’s Debt Free Virgins Without Tattoos (post updated)

Reflections On Lori Alexander’s Debt Free Virgins Without Tattoos

(Post updated below.)


I used to be a gender complementarian, and I wrote about that in (Link): this post.  I rejected complementarianism many years ago.

Lori Alexander is an extremist Christian gender complementarian (some may consider her more of a patriarchalist, I suppose) who has a Facebook group and a blog called “The Transformed Wife,” where she dispenses what many consider to be extremely toxic, harmful, and sexist advice to women, which makes most women want to gag or vomit.

Lori Alexander recently wrote a post called something like, “[Men Find] Debt Free Virgins Without Tattoos [More Attractive].”

If you are new to my blog, a little about myself, so you can see my qualifications for addressing Mrs. Alexander’s commentary:

I was a conservative Christian for many years and a gender complementarian until around the age of 35. I am currently between the ages of 45 and 50 and am still a virgin (that’s right, I’ve never had sex, not even when I was a college student).

I was committed to the idea of waiting until marriage to have sex, and I never found “Mr. Right,” ergo, I never had sex.

I attended college, which my father paid for (thanks, dad!), so I never had any student debt.

I have a college degree.

I’ve never had any tattoos. I’ve also never drank alcohol, smoked, or abused drugs.

Someone on Twitter posted (Link): these screen captures of posts by Lori Alexander. In those screen caps, Alexander is recorded as writing the following (which I will critique below):

By Lori Alexander (“The Transformed Wife”)

Do you know how much more attractive debt-free virgins (without tattoos) are to young men?

Unfortunately, there are so few of these types of young women anymore because of the high costs of college (debt) and sexual promiscuity even within those in the church. [snip URL Alexander cites to her blog post on this subject]

— end Lori Alexander quotes–

A summary of my conclusions and opinions on this matter:
Mrs. Alexander, you are simply incorrect. I am a virgin, I don’t have any tattoos,  I have no debt, for many years I was the epitome of the good, godly, sweet, demure, lady-like complementarian, I’ve never identified as feminist – but none of that enabled me to catch a husband, Christian or otherwise. I remain single past the age of 45.

There are no guarantees that a woman will gain a spouse if only she follows a certain set of dating advice or rules, such as… prays for a spouse, “trusts the Lord” for a spouse, follows complementarian teachings, refrains from attending college, or refrains from receiving a tattoo or dabbling in feminism.

Continue reading “Reflections On Lori Alexander’s Debt Free Virgins Without Tattoos (post updated)”

Southern Baptist Officials Knew of Sexual Abuse Allegations Eleven Years Before Leader’s Arrest

Southern Baptist Officials Knew of Sexual Abuse Allegations Eleven Years Before Leader’s Arrest

Southern Baptists are gender complementarians – they say they respect women, but by looking at news stories like this, one can see that is not so.

As a single woman, I will not take relationship advice from a group of Christians  (Southern Baptists) who cover-up sexual abuse of girls and women, and who teach that male hierarchy and female subordination is “biblical,” which they do as part of “gender complementarian” teachings.

I also won’t bother, contrary to what my parents taught me, to seek a potential husband from a local church, since so many church-goers do things like fondle teen-aged girls and then the rest of the church covers it up.

(Link): Southern Baptist Officials Knew of Sexual Abuse Allegations Eleven Years Before Leader’s Arrest

by Sarah Smith, July 2018

The missionary arm of the Southern Baptist Convention knew about allegations against Southern Baptist leader Mark Aderholt more than 10 years before he was arrested July 3 on charges that he sexually assaulted a 16-year-old girl, according to police records, emails and an internal investigation from the organization.

In 2007, the International Mission Boardconducted an investigation into allegations that Aderholt had a sexual relationship with the girl while he was a 25-year-old student at Southwestern Baptist Theological Seminary in Fort Worth. At the time of the investigation, Aderholt was one of the more prolific missionaries with the Mission Board, which has sent Southern Baptists around the globe for more than a century.

Continue reading “Southern Baptist Officials Knew of Sexual Abuse Allegations Eleven Years Before Leader’s Arrest”

Men Are More Satisfied By ‘Bromances’ Than Their Romantic Relationships, Study Says

(Link):  Men Are More Satisfied By ‘Bromances’ Than Their Romantic Relationships, Study Says

Excerpts:

Young men get more emotional satisfaction out of “bromances”—close, heterosexual friendships with other males—than they do out of romantic relationships with women, according to a small new study published in Men and Masculinities.

Intimate male friendships have become more socially acceptable in recent years, say the study authors, and that’s largely a good thing. But they caution that the shift could lead to weaker bonds among dating or married couples, or even reduce the likelihood of men and women pairing up at all.

Continue reading “Men Are More Satisfied By ‘Bromances’ Than Their Romantic Relationships, Study Says”

I’m in My 40s, Child-Free and Happy. Why Won’t Anyone Believe Me? By Glynnis MacNicol

I’m in My 40s, Child-Free and Happy. Why Won’t Anyone Believe Me? By Glynnis MacNicol

As to this editorial below – I for one never cared much if I had children or not. I just wanted to be married.

So I am more than a little puzzled or annoyed by societal attitudes that assume I am pitiable because I don’t have children, or that I must not know my own preferences or my own mind.

(Link): I’m in My 40s, Child-Free and Happy. Why Won’t Anyone Believe Me?

Excerpts:

Since I turned 40 I’ve encountered disbelief that I could possibly be enjoying my own life. But then there’s the other unexpected gift of this age: just how little concern I have for others’ opinions.

By Glynnis MacNicol
July 5, 2018

A few months before my 42nd birthday, I was out to dinner with friends and found myself seated next to a well-known older male writer.

I happened to be in the final stages of finishing a proposal for a memoir about being a single woman over 40 without children, and was inwardly marveling at the timing of our encounter. I was a fan of his. Perhaps he might offer some wisdom? Words of encouragement?

As drinks were delivered I sketched the outline of the story: No one had prepared me for how exhilarating life could be on my own. I was traveling all the time, doing what I wanted, when I wanted, released from the fear of the clock that had dogged me through my 30s.

Conversely, no one had warned me of the ways in which it would actually be difficult; my mother had been very ill, for instance, and part of the book was about caring for her.

No sooner had I finished than the famous writer placed his glass firmly on the white tablecloth, leaned back and declared: “Glynnis MacNicol, you have a terrible life!”

….I again faced a dilemma I’d been struggling with since turning 40: how to counter other people’s disbelief that I, single and child-free, could possibly be enjoying my own life.

Continue reading “I’m in My 40s, Child-Free and Happy. Why Won’t Anyone Believe Me? By Glynnis MacNicol”

Want More Babies? You Need Less Patriarchy by M. Goldberg

Want More Babies? You Need Less Patriarchy by M. Goldberg

(Link): Want More Babies? You Need Less Patriarchy – on New York Times

Same editorial here:

(Link): Want More Babies? You Need Less Patriarchy – Oregonian

Excerpts:

Last week, the National Center for Health Statistics reported that America’s birthrate reached a historic low in 2017, falling to 60.2 births per 1,000 women of childbearing age.

For a population in the developed world to replace itself, the average woman needs to have around 2.1 children. In the United States, where fertility has been below replacement for about a decade, the average woman now has 1.77.

Several commentators have described the plunge as a mystery, particularly since we’re in a period of economic growth. Some on the right have, absurdly, blamed the shrinking birthrate on abortion, even though abortion rates are also as low as they’ve been since Roe v. Wade was decided.

More thoughtful conservatives, like National Review’s David French, speculated that the baby bust could be a sign of the same sort of sweeping despair that has been linked to America’s decreasing life expectancy.

I have another theory. Perhaps the United States is becoming more like the rest of the industrialized world, where declining birthrates are correlated with a lack of support for working mothers.

Continue reading “Want More Babies? You Need Less Patriarchy by M. Goldberg”

Women Are Sharing Their Experiences of What Happened When They Rejected Men

Women Are Sharing Their Experiences of What Happened When They Rejected Men

(Link): Women Are Sharing Their Experiences of What Happened When They Rejected Men

Excerpts:

There’s been a lot in the news recently about incels and redistribution of sex. Incel = involuntarily celibate, and redistribution of sex = women being expected to shag these blokes so they don’t get all murdery about not getting laid. Completely understandably, many people took exception to this.

It takes away womens’ bodily autonomy and puts the blame on them when men become violent.

It’s also sparked a debate, with plenty of guys steaming in to say #NotAllMen and get defensive about incels being the only ones who become aggressive when rejected. Elizabeth May retaliated to this by asking the women of Twitter what their experiences had been after rejecting men.

[there are many examples on the page]

(Link): TWITTER TERROR Women reveal the most ‘frightening’ experiences they have had with men after rejecting them in a harrowing Twitter thread

Excerpts:

by Lydia Hawken

Elizabeth May has encouraged women to share their experiences in this viral Twitter thread

WOMEN all over the world are sharing their most frightening dating experiences in a Twitter thread that has had over 2,500 responses.

Continue reading “Women Are Sharing Their Experiences of What Happened When They Rejected Men”