The Unfortunate Anti-Virginity Fall-Out from Christian Misogynist Lori Alexander’s Wacky “Debt Free Virgins Without Tattoos” Post – The Problem is Not Supporting Virginity, It’s Complementarianism

The Unfortunate Anti-Virginity Fall-Out from Christian Misogynist Lori Alexander’s  Wacky “Debt Free Virgins Without Tattoos” Post – The Problem is Not Supporting Virginity, It’s Complementarianism

Updated:

Lori Alexander has posted this (unhelpful) clarification of her post (about “Debt Free Virgins with Tattoos”) on an ultra-conservative political forum:

(Link): Godly Men Prefer Debt Free Virgins Without Tattoos – by Lori Alexander, on Free Republic

Her new aspect is to add the word “Godly” prior to the word “Men,” as if that makes it less obnoxious or wrong, but it does not.

I used to lurk at the Free Republic site, back in my more conservative days, but I’m not surprised to see most of the posters under Alexander’s post on that site actually agreeing with it.

Of course they do.

I’m still a conservative, but I’m no longer off the reservation about it, as the Freepers are on some things, like on this topic.


The Unfortunate Anti- Virginity Fall Out Due to Lori Alexander’s “Debt Free Virgin” Post

If you’d like more background to this post, and an explanation for who Lori Alexander is, please see my previous post about it here:

(Link): Reflections On Lori Alexander’s Debt Free Virgins Without Tattoos

If you are new to my blog, a recap:

I am over 45 years of age and still a virgin.

I was reserving sexual activity for marriage. I’ve never had sexual intercourse. I was expecting to be married but never found Mr. Right.

I do have a libido.

Contrary to what Christians ASSUME about older virgins, Celibacy, being sexually abstinent for as long as I’ve been, is not “a gift” where God granted it to me and supernaturally removed my libido and makes it easy-breezy to cope with.

For many years, I was dedicated to remaining a virgin until marriage, due to Christian ethics, (these days I’m semi-agnostic), but also due to other reasons as well, which I shall not get into here but have explained in older posts on the blog.

In the last ten or so years, I’ve seen a disturbing trend where secular, liberal feminist views about sex have trickled into liberal Christian corners, where there is much railing against “slut shaming” and there is strong opposition to judging any woman for her sexual behavior or choices.

This trend became so common that these same views, disturbingly, began appearing on liberal Christian blogs and sites, whose progressive, feminist, Christian authors began writing editorials saying virginity is of no import, God only cares about your heart and spiritual purity, and God does not care so much anyone’s sexual behavior, (Link): intact hymen, or sexual past.

This anti- sexual purity thinking (which includes the down-playing, condemning, or mocking of physical virginity and adult celibacy) has even crept into mainstream moderate- to- conservative churches and Christian writing and thinking, unfortunately.

Continue reading “The Unfortunate Anti-Virginity Fall-Out from Christian Misogynist Lori Alexander’s Wacky “Debt Free Virgins Without Tattoos” Post – The Problem is Not Supporting Virginity, It’s Complementarianism”

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Singles Discrimination, Complementarianism, Equally Yoked Teaching, and Spotting Predators in Church Video

Singles Discrimination, Complementarianism, Equally Yoked Teaching, and Spotting Predators in Church Video

Someone in a Christian discussion group posted this video (and I don’t want to link to the group or mention it by name, though you may be able to figure out which one it is, especially if you are already familiar with it), and the Christians on the discussion board talked about it:

(Link): When A Predator Shows Up At Your Church — Here’s What You Do!

That same video has also been making the rounds on other Christian blogs, sites, forums, and on Twitter.

The video is around 18 minutes long. I watched it a few days ago.

The video features a Christian woman who says a 50-something guy showed up at her church, a man who set off red flags for her, due to his weird behavior around the kids who were there at the church, including her own.

The man behaved overly-familiar with her kid, other people’s kids who were there, and he ignored the parents of the kids.

(1) First, I’m going to discuss what I believe this video has to do with complementarianism.

(2) Then I am going to discuss some of the disturbing comments about adult singles that were made in the Christian discussion group where I saw this video posted to, and next,

(3) I’ll move on to discussing, as mentioned by a woman or two in the group, about the creepy behavior single adult women have to put up with, even at church, and what this has to do with the Christian “Equally Yoked” teaching.

Continue reading “Singles Discrimination, Complementarianism, Equally Yoked Teaching, and Spotting Predators in Church Video”

Reflections On Lori Alexander’s Debt Free Virgins Without Tattoos (post updated)

Reflections On Lori Alexander’s Debt Free Virgins Without Tattoos

(Post updated below.)


I used to be a gender complementarian, and I wrote about that in (Link): this post.  I rejected complementarianism many years ago.

Lori Alexander is an extremist Christian gender complementarian (some may consider her more of a patriarchalist, I suppose) who has a Facebook group and a blog called “The Transformed Wife,” where she dispenses what many consider to be extremely toxic, harmful, and sexist advice to women, which makes most women want to gag or vomit.

Lori Alexander recently wrote a post called something like, “[Men Find] Debt Free Virgins Without Tattoos [More Attractive].”

If you are new to my blog, a little about myself, so you can see my qualifications for addressing Mrs. Alexander’s commentary:

I was a conservative Christian for many years and a gender complementarian until around the age of 35. I am currently between the ages of 45 and 50 and am still a virgin (that’s right, I’ve never had sex, not even when I was a college student).

I was committed to the idea of waiting until marriage to have sex, and I never found “Mr. Right,” ergo, I never had sex.

I attended college, which my father paid for (thanks, dad!), so I never had any student debt.

I have a college degree.

I’ve never had any tattoos. I’ve also never drank alcohol, smoked, or abused drugs.

Someone on Twitter posted (Link): these screen captures of posts by Lori Alexander. In those screen caps, Alexander is recorded as writing the following (which I will critique below):

By Lori Alexander (“The Transformed Wife”)

Do you know how much more attractive debt-free virgins (without tattoos) are to young men?

Unfortunately, there are so few of these types of young women anymore because of the high costs of college (debt) and sexual promiscuity even within those in the church. [snip URL Alexander cites to her blog post on this subject]

— end Lori Alexander quotes–

A summary of my conclusions and opinions on this matter:
Mrs. Alexander, you are simply incorrect. I am a virgin, I don’t have any tattoos,  I have no debt, for many years I was the epitome of the good, godly, sweet, demure, lady-like complementarian, I’ve never identified as feminist – but none of that enabled me to catch a husband, Christian or otherwise. I remain single past the age of 45.

There are no guarantees that a woman will gain a spouse if only she follows a certain set of dating advice or rules, such as… prays for a spouse, “trusts the Lord” for a spouse, follows complementarian teachings, refrains from attending college, or refrains from receiving a tattoo or dabbling in feminism.

Continue reading “Reflections On Lori Alexander’s Debt Free Virgins Without Tattoos (post updated)”

Southern Baptist Officials Knew of Sexual Abuse Allegations Eleven Years Before Leader’s Arrest

Southern Baptist Officials Knew of Sexual Abuse Allegations Eleven Years Before Leader’s Arrest

Southern Baptists are gender complementarians – they say they respect women, but by looking at news stories like this, one can see that is not so.

As a single woman, I will not take relationship advice from a group of Christians  (Southern Baptists) who cover-up sexual abuse of girls and women, and who teach that male hierarchy and female subordination is “biblical,” which they do as part of “gender complementarian” teachings.

I also won’t bother, contrary to what my parents taught me, to seek a potential husband from a local church, since so many church-goers do things like fondle teen-aged girls and then the rest of the church covers it up.

(Link): Southern Baptist Officials Knew of Sexual Abuse Allegations Eleven Years Before Leader’s Arrest

by Sarah Smith, July 2018

The missionary arm of the Southern Baptist Convention knew about allegations against Southern Baptist leader Mark Aderholt more than 10 years before he was arrested July 3 on charges that he sexually assaulted a 16-year-old girl, according to police records, emails and an internal investigation from the organization.

In 2007, the International Mission Boardconducted an investigation into allegations that Aderholt had a sexual relationship with the girl while he was a 25-year-old student at Southwestern Baptist Theological Seminary in Fort Worth. At the time of the investigation, Aderholt was one of the more prolific missionaries with the Mission Board, which has sent Southern Baptists around the globe for more than a century.

Continue reading “Southern Baptist Officials Knew of Sexual Abuse Allegations Eleven Years Before Leader’s Arrest”

I’m in My 40s, Child-Free and Happy. Why Won’t Anyone Believe Me? By Glynnis MacNicol

I’m in My 40s, Child-Free and Happy. Why Won’t Anyone Believe Me? By Glynnis MacNicol

As to this editorial below – I for one never cared much if I had children or not. I just wanted to be married.

So I am more than a little puzzled or annoyed by societal attitudes that assume I am pitiable because I don’t have children, or that I must not know my own preferences or my own mind.

(Link): I’m in My 40s, Child-Free and Happy. Why Won’t Anyone Believe Me?

Excerpts:

Since I turned 40 I’ve encountered disbelief that I could possibly be enjoying my own life. But then there’s the other unexpected gift of this age: just how little concern I have for others’ opinions.

By Glynnis MacNicol
July 5, 2018

A few months before my 42nd birthday, I was out to dinner with friends and found myself seated next to a well-known older male writer.

I happened to be in the final stages of finishing a proposal for a memoir about being a single woman over 40 without children, and was inwardly marveling at the timing of our encounter. I was a fan of his. Perhaps he might offer some wisdom? Words of encouragement?

As drinks were delivered I sketched the outline of the story: No one had prepared me for how exhilarating life could be on my own. I was traveling all the time, doing what I wanted, when I wanted, released from the fear of the clock that had dogged me through my 30s.

Conversely, no one had warned me of the ways in which it would actually be difficult; my mother had been very ill, for instance, and part of the book was about caring for her.

No sooner had I finished than the famous writer placed his glass firmly on the white tablecloth, leaned back and declared: “Glynnis MacNicol, you have a terrible life!”

….I again faced a dilemma I’d been struggling with since turning 40: how to counter other people’s disbelief that I, single and child-free, could possibly be enjoying my own life.

Continue reading “I’m in My 40s, Child-Free and Happy. Why Won’t Anyone Believe Me? By Glynnis MacNicol”

Want More Babies? You Need Less Patriarchy by M. Goldberg

Want More Babies? You Need Less Patriarchy by M. Goldberg

(Link): Want More Babies? You Need Less Patriarchy – on New York Times

Same editorial here:

(Link): Want More Babies? You Need Less Patriarchy – Oregonian

Excerpts:

Last week, the National Center for Health Statistics reported that America’s birthrate reached a historic low in 2017, falling to 60.2 births per 1,000 women of childbearing age.

For a population in the developed world to replace itself, the average woman needs to have around 2.1 children. In the United States, where fertility has been below replacement for about a decade, the average woman now has 1.77.

Several commentators have described the plunge as a mystery, particularly since we’re in a period of economic growth. Some on the right have, absurdly, blamed the shrinking birthrate on abortion, even though abortion rates are also as low as they’ve been since Roe v. Wade was decided.

More thoughtful conservatives, like National Review’s David French, speculated that the baby bust could be a sign of the same sort of sweeping despair that has been linked to America’s decreasing life expectancy.

I have another theory. Perhaps the United States is becoming more like the rest of the industrialized world, where declining birthrates are correlated with a lack of support for working mothers.

Continue reading “Want More Babies? You Need Less Patriarchy by M. Goldberg”

Women Are Sharing Their Experiences of What Happened When They Rejected Men

Women Are Sharing Their Experiences of What Happened When They Rejected Men

(Link): Women Are Sharing Their Experiences of What Happened When They Rejected Men

Excerpts:

There’s been a lot in the news recently about incels and redistribution of sex. Incel = involuntarily celibate, and redistribution of sex = women being expected to shag these blokes so they don’t get all murdery about not getting laid. Completely understandably, many people took exception to this.

It takes away womens’ bodily autonomy and puts the blame on them when men become violent.

It’s also sparked a debate, with plenty of guys steaming in to say #NotAllMen and get defensive about incels being the only ones who become aggressive when rejected. Elizabeth May retaliated to this by asking the women of Twitter what their experiences had been after rejecting men.

[there are many examples on the page]

(Link): TWITTER TERROR Women reveal the most ‘frightening’ experiences they have had with men after rejecting them in a harrowing Twitter thread

Excerpts:

by Lydia Hawken

Elizabeth May has encouraged women to share their experiences in this viral Twitter thread

WOMEN all over the world are sharing their most frightening dating experiences in a Twitter thread that has had over 2,500 responses.

Continue reading “Women Are Sharing Their Experiences of What Happened When They Rejected Men”

Thoughts on the NRO Essay “Advice For Incels” by Kevin D. Williamson

Thoughts on the NRO Essay “Advice For Incels” by Kevin D. Williamson

About me and this blog:

If you are new to my blog: I have been a conservative my entire life. I’ve never voted Democrat. I was a Republican until a few years ago. I am no longer in any political party.

I sometimes critique secular, left wing feminists on my blog (such as but not limited to (Link): this post and (Link): this one), but there are times when I believe other conservatives get feminists wrong, and feminists are actually correct on some issues.

I was brought up in a traditional values, conservative, Christian family where my parents brought me to Southern Baptist churches as I was growing up, where I was taught to believe in gender complementarianism, which I did for many years, until I finally realized how (Link): wrong and sexist complementarianism is.

Because I grew up as a complementarian, I am quite familiar with what they think and why they think as they do.

My current religious beliefs are somewhat “up in the air,” as I am waffling between being agnostic, (or a deist), and the Christian faith. (Note: I am not an atheist.)

I am by no means anti- Nuclear Family, anti- motherhood, or anti- marriage, though I do posit that many to most conservatives – especially the religious ones – have gone to un-biblical lengths and have turned the Nuclear Family, marriage, natalism, and motherhood and fatherhood into idols which is wrong of them.

— end introduction to me and this blog —

I saw a link to this essay go through my Twitter feed today:

(Link): Advice for Incels by Kevin D. Williamson

On one level, this essay – “Advice for Incels” was okay.

However, I think that while the guy who wrote it has his heart in the right place, I think he gets a lot of things wrong and is naive about how Baptist and conservative Protestant and evangelical churches are for adult singles.

I’ve spent the last several years on this blog covering these topics – I’d encourage Williamson and anyone who read his NRO piece to read the books  (Link): “Singled Out” by Field and Colon and  “Quitting Church” by Christian author Julia Duin for even more information.

Continue reading “Thoughts on the NRO Essay “Advice For Incels” by Kevin D. Williamson”

The Sexless Life When Sex Is God by D. French

The Sexless Life When Sex Is God by D. French

(The link to the editorial by D. French is farther below)

Overall, it’s a good essay, though I can’t say as though I totally agree with this author’s suggestion, which involves teaching people to put faith in God, or a god, because, he believes, one issue with incel men is that they have turned sex into a deity.

And that may well be true – perhaps incels have turned sex into a deity, but I’m not sure asking them to turn to God will necessarily fix this issue.

Why? Because more and more Americans are post-Christian, or, if they still believe in God, they now regard themselves as “nones” or “dones” and have been leaving churches in droves.  There is little to no respect by such people for what churches or pastors are saying or preaching.

Not only that, but a lot of Christians, as I have blogged about repeatedly on this site, have also turned sex into a deity themselves.

I have many examples on my blogs of pastors who mock and disparage singleness, celibacy, and adult virginity, who go on and on in their sermons about how great marriage is and how great sex is.

One of a few solutions I put forth is this: since our (secular) culture esteems choice so highly, remind the third-wave feminists and the sexist bro-dudes who worship sex, that if they expect everyone to respect their choice to have, or to want, pre-marital sex, that they need to return that favor and respect those, who by choice or circumstance, are virgins into adulthood, or who practice celibacy.

Some feminists yell, scream, and complain about “slut shaming,” but some of them (and the wider culture) likes to practice Celibate Shaming and Virgin Shaming, which I’ve blogged about many times before (with some examples).

Continue reading “The Sexless Life When Sex Is God by D. French”

Actually We Don’t Owe You Sex, and We Never Will by M. Donegan

Actually We Don’t Owe You Sex, and We Never Will by M. Donegan

(Link to the Donegan editorial is farther below)

As I’ve mentioned on older posts on this blog, not only do women not owe men sex, we don’t owe them smiles, dates, attention, emotional support, or companionship, but some of them are under the very misguided notion that we do.

According to this article, some of these bitter sexist ass hat male incels feel that women have a moral obligation to have sex with them – no, we do not. One of the incels quoted argued that people (or is it just men?) have a “right” to sex – no, wrong again.

If you are a sexless man, I am under no obligation to have sex with you. I do not owe you sex.

Continue reading “Actually We Don’t Owe You Sex, and We Never Will by M. Donegan”

A #MeToo Divorce Debate in the Philippines by James Hookway

A #MeToo Divorce Debate in the Philippines by James Hookway

(Link): A #MeToo Divorce Debate in the Philippines by James Hookway

Excerpts:

April 27, 2018

When the tiny island nation of Malta voted to allow divorce in 2011, Melody Alan realized that her own strongly Catholic country, the Philippines, was the only one left in the world without that right (aside from the Vatican).

Last fall, as the #MeToo movement began to ripple out from the U.S., she and fellow advocates for divorce seized the moment and tried to recast the debate.

Ms Alan’s own husband left her and their two children for another woman in 2010. He offered to support an annulment of their marriage (an elaborate court or church procedure) but only if she would pay the entire cost – more than a year’s worth of her schoolteacher’s salary.

“I wanted to be free of him and call myself a free woman, but I couldn’t,” she told legislators in February, when a parade of women appeared before a committee of the country’s House of Representatives. Some recounted abuse at the hands of their husbands, abandonment to a life of poverty and single motherhood with no chance of remarriage.

Last month, a divorce bill cleared the House of Representatives for the first time. …

Continue reading “A #MeToo Divorce Debate in the Philippines by James Hookway”

When Pop Culture Sells Dangerous Myths About Romance by J. Beck

When Pop Culture Sells Dangerous Myths About Romance by J. Beck

(Link): When Pop Culture Sells Dangerous Myths About Romance by J. Beck

Entertainment glorifying or excusing predatory male behavior is everywhere—from songs about “blurred lines” to TV shows where rapists marry their victims.

Jan 2018

Edward Cullen. Chuck Bass. Lloyd Dobler. Spike from Buffy the Vampire Slayer. That guy from Love Actually with the sign. The lead singers of emo bands with their brooding lyrics.

Many of the romantic heroes that made me swoon in my youth followed a pattern and, like a Magic Eye picture, only with a little distance did the shape of it pop out to me. All of these characters in some way crossed, or at least blurred, the lines of consent, aggressively pursuing women with little or no regard for their desires.

But these characters’ actions, and those of countless other leading men across the pop-culture landscape, were more likely to be portrayed as charming than scary.

Continue reading “When Pop Culture Sells Dangerous Myths About Romance by J. Beck”

Who Are “Incels” (Involuntary Celibates)? Behind the Misogynistic Ideology That Inspired The Toronto Suspect by T. Merrigan

Who Are “Incels”? Behind the Misogynistic Ideology That Inspired The Toronto Suspect

Much farther below, in this post: link to an article hosted on The Lily, about Alex Minassian, who was apparently influenced by online “incel” (women-hating) groups.

I’ve actually already done a post or two about these misogynists before, such as (Link): this one – they refer to themselves as “Involuntary Celibates” and blame women for their problems and lives, rather than taking responsibility for themselves. (They also like to live in a fantasy world where women have lives so much easier than men, and, women are supposedly to blame for the problems of men.)

These bitter men exude hatred of women but then have the audacity to bleat on Reddit threads and elsewhere that “women don’t like nice guys,” and they cannot comprehend how it is no woman wants to date or have sex with a “nice guy” (who is actually a big, sexist, woman-hating jerk) such as themselves.

It’s no mystery – well, not to the rest of us.

One problem of posting about these sexist douche canoes is that they will at times want to leave a comment under any posts you make about them.

According to some of these articles I’ve read about Incels, they celebrate every time an Incel kills women. If Incels kill all the women, there won’t be any women for them to have a chance of having sex with – they’d have to have sex with other men.

Other than being immoral, killing women is counter-productive to their goals of having sex with a real living woman. But I guess not only do they lack in looks, incels also aren’t very intelligent.

Continue reading “Who Are “Incels” (Involuntary Celibates)? Behind the Misogynistic Ideology That Inspired The Toronto Suspect by T. Merrigan”

Wife Who Was Body Shamed For Having a ‘Handsome’ Husband Responds to Trolls

Wife Who Was Body Shamed For Having a ‘Handsome’ Husband Responds to Trolls

(Link): Wife Who Was Body Shamed For Having a ‘Handsome’ Husband Responds to Trolls

by Greg Evans, March 2018

“Beauty is in the eye of the beholder”goes the old saying but for some people, beauty is dependent on how hot your husband is.

At least that’s what one person tried to tell wedding photographer and entrepreneur Jenna Kutcher on Instagram.

Jenna has shared several images of herself and her husband Drew taking romantic strolls on an exotic beach in Hawaii.

Jenna who describes herself as “curvy” often receives a lot of positive messages on her pictures which regularly rack up thousands of likes.

However, her figure has been a source of criticism as of late with one direct message dared to question how she managed to land a husband who is as handsome and as chiselled as Drew.

Continue reading “Wife Who Was Body Shamed For Having a ‘Handsome’ Husband Responds to Trolls”

Dear Abby: I Gave Up Dating, and 30 Years Later, I’m Lonely

Dear Abby: I Gave Up Dating, and 30 Years Later, I’m Lonely

This post has been edited to add even more reader comments from other sites that published this Abby letter. Virtually nobody is sympathetic with this guy.


I was genuinely feeling empathy and sympathy for this dude, right up until this phrase in his letter to Dear Abby:

I’m not attracted to women my age, and I don’t see younger women being attracted to an overweight old guy…”

Die alone, ageist rat bastard!

You’re in your 70s, by your own admission, you’re dumpy- or tubby- looking and don’t have a great income, but you pine after some 20, 30, or 40 or 50 year old hottie? (And I bet this sexist pig jerk expects any chick he dates to not only be younger but very thin, too.)

Oh get bent, ten times over!

Continue reading “Dear Abby: I Gave Up Dating, and 30 Years Later, I’m Lonely”

Tim Challies Needs to Shut His Pie Hole about Many Things, but Especially About Dating, Marriage, Singleness, and Now, Equally Yoked

Tim Challies Needs to Shut His Pie Hole about Many Things, but Especially About Dating, Marriage, Singleness, and Now, Equally Yoked

Tim Challies is the doofus Christian blogger, speaker, and book author who has actually said garbage in the past such as “even fornicators are virgins now” (yeah, (Link): he really said that).

Also bear in mind:

(Link): Tim Challies, Who Is Fine With Single Adults Fornicating, Is Not Okay With Fake Sex on TV, As Portrayed by Married Actors

(Link):  Christians (such as Tim Challies and his wife) Want to Hold Adulterers Accountable but Give Adult Single Fornicators a Pass

Furthermore, Challies is so vested in his belief of “Christian gender complementarianism,” he doesn’t care that its “male headship” doctrine leads to domestic violence against women and often leads to pressuring women to staying in abusive marriages; you can read more about that here:

(Link, to “Internet Monk” site): Stuck With Their Noses In the Text

Challies is more interested in women obeying the “male headship” and female subordination articles of faith that comprise gender complementarianism than he is in the safety and well-being of women.

As such, if you are a single woman, do you REALLY want to take any sort of relationship advice from this kind of person who does not value YOU as a person?

I would hope not.

See this:

(Link):  Consider The Source: Christians Who Give Singles Dating Advice Also Regularly Coach Wives to Stay in Abusive Marriages

Here is the link to the Tim Challies “Equally Yoked” article on Christian Post site (with more remarks by me below the excerpts):

(Link): Tim Challies Warns Christians the ‘Bible Is Very Clear’ Not to Marry Unbelievers

Here are excerpts from that page:

“The Bible makes it very, very clear that a Christian can only marry another Christian. You may not marry somebody who is an unbeliever. You should not marry somebody for whom you’re not certain whether they’re a believer or not. So absolutely, the first thing is, is this person a believer in Jesus Christ? Do we share faith?” Challies advised Thursday in part two of his message on Christian dating.

Continue reading “Tim Challies Needs to Shut His Pie Hole about Many Things, but Especially About Dating, Marriage, Singleness, and Now, Equally Yoked”

Men Who Believe ‘Madonna-Whore Dichotomy’ Have Less Satisfying Relationships

Men Who Believe ‘Madonna-Whore Dichotomy’ Have Less Satisfying Relationships

(Link): Men Who Believe ‘Madonna-Whore Dichotomy’ Have Less Satisfying Relationships

By Meera Jagannathan, Moneyish

Clinging to male dominance won’t do your relationship any favors.

Men who buy into the Sigmund Freud-coined “Madonna-Whore dichotomy” — i.e., viewing women as either “good” and chaste or “bad” and promiscuous — are more likely to embrace a “patriarchy-enhancing ideology” and feel less satisfied in romantic relationships, a recent studypublished in the journal Sex Roles found.

“These men may have difficulties feeling attracted to the women they love, or loving the women to whom they are sexually attracted, leading to chronic dissatisfaction in their romantic relationships,” lead author Orly Bareket said in a statement.

Continue reading “Men Who Believe ‘Madonna-Whore Dichotomy’ Have Less Satisfying Relationships”

One Group That Thinks Grown Men “Courting” Teen Girls Is Natural? Fundamentalist Home-Schoolers by R. Graham

One Group That Thinks Grown Men “Courting” Teen Girls Is Natural? Fundamentalist Home-Schoolers by R. Graham

I linked to an article very similar to the one below a few months ago (Link): here.

I’ve also blogged about Phil Robertson’s gross, sexist, and creepy idea before that girls should marry at age 15 (Link): here.

(Link):  One Group That Thinks Grown Men “Courting” Teen Girls Is Natural? Fundamentalist Home-Schoolers by R. Graham

[Some Christians object to the idea of adult men dating teen girls.]

….But there’s a group of Moore’s allies for whom the basic idea of an unmarried older man “courting” a teenage girl is not anathema at all—fundamentalist home-schoolers.

Duck Dynasty patriarch Phil Robertson, who (Link): endorsed Moore in the contested Republican primary and has spoken at his rallies, told an audience in 2009 that girls should marry when they’re (Link): “about 15 or 16.”

Moore has (Link): appeared several times on a radio show hosted by Kevin Swanson, an ultra-conservative Colorado pastor who  (Link): defended Robertson’s notion that girls should be marrying at 15 because it helps them avoid sexual sin.

I’ve never married, still a virgin at age 40+, and I have a sex drive: it’s simply not true that “getting married young”(or getting married at all) is necessary to prevent someone from dabbling in sexual sin.

Staying a virgin past one’s teen years is not (Link): an impossible, heroic feat.

Anyone can do it.

Most choose not to.

Being celibate is a choice and a self-discipline, and it’s not due to lacking a sex drive; it is not a godly, incredibly difficult feat only a few can pull off. Anyone can do this.

Is is somewhat difficult when you’re single and rather be married and having sex? Yes, it can be somewhat difficult at times, but not to the point where one loses control of one’s ability to refrain.

Also, getting married does not keep people from “burning with lust,” with all due respect to the New Testament’s apostole Paul:

A lot of people get married only to sexually sin by having sex with people not their spouse, by fondling children, viewing porn, hiring prostitutes etc., and so on – see my many examples of married couples engaging in sexual sin (Link): here (i.e., collection of news stories of married people arrested for hiring prostitutes, etc).

Excerpts from the article:

Moore has an even deeper relationship with Doug Phillips, a disgraced leader in the “Biblical patriarchy” movement. Phillips was president of Vision Forum, a Texas-based organization devoted to the (Link): “restoration of the Christian household.”

In Phillips’ world, men ought to be self-sufficient by the time they marry, but women live under their father’s authority until they marry.

Continue reading “One Group That Thinks Grown Men “Courting” Teen Girls Is Natural? Fundamentalist Home-Schoolers by R. Graham”

Your Boss Hired You to Perform A Job Not Flirt With Co-Workers – The ‘Me Too’ Backlash

Your Boss Hired You to Perform A Job Not Flirt With Co-Workers

About me: I am a right wing person who is not affiliated with any political party after leaving the Republican Party a few years ago.
I don’t call myself a “feminist” because many feminists tend to be liberal, and I am not liberal.
However, I do agree with feminists on some topics, not all.


In the weeks after women began sharing their workplace stories of sexual harassment on social media (starting around fall of 2017), using the “Me Too” hash tag, there began a steady stream of backlash, some of which includes push-back by both men, and unfortunately, a fragment of women, saying how so terrible the “Me Too” phenomenon is, all because now, some men may be too afraid to flirt with women at their jobs.

I for one do not want to be flirted with at any job I hold.

When I am in a workplace, I am there to perform work-related tasks. I am not there to get dates or humor single men who may be lonely.

My boss or the human resources department hired me to do work-related tasks.

Unless you were hired by a john to be a prostitute or to be a porn actor, you are not at your job to have sex, ask for dates, flirt with others, grope others, wink suggestively at them and make suggestive jokes.

You’re there to give status reports, Power Point presentations, and file memos, and to do other standard, day- to- day office- grind stuff.

If you’re a single man who wants a girlfriend, you need to use venues or media that is applicable to that very purpose, such as dating sites or nightclubs – a job is not a proper place to do that.

Get your friends to set you up on blind dates.

Try to strike up conversations with single women in the produce section at your local Kroger’s grocery store, or use the “Meet Up” site to meet others who have similar interests to yours.

Get a pet dog and go take it on walks at your local park; maybe a dog-loving, single woman will approach you to chat with you about the dog, and you can ask her on a date at that point.

But your workplace is NOT the appropriate venue by which to flirt or pick up women.

If you are a single man who does not like dating sites or nightclubs, that is not my problem.

If you ask a woman out on a date once (or flirt with her), and she either sends signals she does not want to date you, or else plainly communicates she is not interested, she indicates she is not receptive, you need to leave her alone at that stage. Stop flirting.

Stop winking, asking her out, and you should NOT be grabbing a woman co-worker by any part of her anatomy in the first place, nor should you be showing her porn photos, or whipping out your nude penis in front of her.

If you keep pursuing a woman, (and why do so many of you men do this – because you assume women find it cute, endearing, flattering, or sexy, or you actually believe in the false cliche “women love playing hard to get”?), that woman will come to view your attention as sexual harassment.

Continue reading “Your Boss Hired You to Perform A Job Not Flirt With Co-Workers – The ‘Me Too’ Backlash”

Tinder, Dating and Sex in Saudi Arabia — where Love is a ‘Sin.’

(Link): Tinder, Dating and Sex in Saudi Arabia — where Love is a ‘Sin.’

RIYADH, Saudi Arabia — The course of true love never did run smooth. While applicable the world over, Shakespeare’s words are particularly true in swiftly changing Saudi Arabia.

Long forbidden, dating has arrived in the ultra-conservative Gulf kingdom with some Saudis meeting and marrying without the help of relatives. Well-heeled millennials meet via Tinder, Snapchat, Twitter and Instagram.

Continue reading “Tinder, Dating and Sex in Saudi Arabia — where Love is a ‘Sin.’”