Help! Can I Use My Dead Wife’s Vibrator With My New Girlfriend?

Help! Can I Use My Dead Wife’s Vibrator With My New Girlfriend?

I can’t believe I didn’t stumble across this bizarre perversion when it was first published back in 2013 (this is a re-print).

A lot of Americans spend a lot of time shaming adults over the age of 25 or so for still being virgins as being freaks or odd-balls, but the real odd-balls and freaks are people having sex who do gross, weird things like think it may be okay to pawn off their dead wife’s vibrator on their new girlfriend, I mean, WTF?

(Link): Help! Can I Use My Dead Wife’s Vibrator With My New Girlfriend?

Is This Creepy?

August 7, 2022 (originally printed in 2013)
by Slate Staff

Dear Prudence,

In the summer of 2011 my wife and I purchased a top-of-the-line Jopen vibrator. We used it a few times and were just beginning to really integrate it into our sex lives when my wife died suddenly of a heart attack. (The vibrator had nothing to do with that.)

Now, more than a year later, I’ve begun to date again. I’ve met a woman with an open mind, and I’m thinking she might be interested in using the vibrator.

But I’m not sure how, or whether, to suggest it.

Is it creepy to offer a dead woman’s vibrator to someone else?

Continue reading “Help! Can I Use My Dead Wife’s Vibrator With My New Girlfriend?”

Pastor Appears To Berate Congregation For Not Buying Him A High-Priced Watch In Viral Clip

Pastor Appears To Berate Congregation For Not Buying Him A High-Priced Watch In Viral Clip

It didn’t become clearly apparent to me until after my mother died when I was in my late 30s just how incredibly selfish, self absorbed, and narcissistic people are, including Christ-professing Christians who may even attend church regularly.

Yes, I had brief flashes and intuitions in my youth and 20s and 30s prior to my mother dying that people could be jerks or selfish and so on, but I did not realize HOW COMMON it was among so many people, including Christians, until after my Mom died.

Until Mom died, I had assumed that most people (Christians in particular) were empathetic people I could turn to if I was ever hurting, in a bind, and in need of emotional support (and my Mom kind of led me to believe I could count on other people, especially family, for support) – boy wow was that expectation ever shattered.

The Christians I went to in my grieving process time (whether extended family of mine or people I met at churches I attended) were insensitive, callous,  unempathetic, or selfish (some acted like sparing 30 to 60 minutes of their time every several months for me to to talk to them about me missing my Mom would be a huge, huge burden to them).

I know better now. I really had my eyes opened to the fact that most people, including Christians, are selfish, unempathetic tools.

In light of all that, I can’t say as though I am shocked by the selfishness and entitled attitude of this church preacher:

(Link): ‘False prophet’ pastor berates congregation for not buying him pricey new watch 

August 17, 2022
By Natalie O’Neill

Time for a new preacher!

A Missouri pastor was caught on camera berating his “broke” congregation for failing to buy him an expensive Movado watch — sparking criticism that he wants to make a profit, not be a prophet.

Pastor Carlton Funderburke of the Church at the Well in Kansas City was giving a fiery sermon about “honoring God’s shepherds” when he scolded his followers for being too poor to give him the pricey timepiece he’d requested, according to now-viral TikTok footage.

(Link): Missouri pastor says congregation is ‘poor, broke, busted’ for not buying him a luxury Movado watch

Carlton Funderburke, the senior pastor at Church at the Well, issued an apology video Tuesday for his “inexcusable” remarks in an Aug. 7 sermon.

August 17, 2022

A Kansas City, Missouri, pastor who said his congregation was “poor, broke busted and disgusted” for not buying him the luxury watch he wanted has issued an apology after his remarks caused a stir on social media.

Carlton Funderburke, the senior pastor at Church at the Well, issued an apology video Tuesday for the “inexcusable” remarks he made in an Aug. 7 sermon.

Continue reading “Pastor Appears To Berate Congregation For Not Buying Him A High-Priced Watch In Viral Clip”

Man Whose Children Were Killed by Drunk Driver Commits Suicide a Day After Father’s Day

Man Whose Children Were Killed by Drunk Driver Commits Suicide a Day After Father’s Day

I skimmed the article; it doesn’t say what drove this man’s anxiety and suicidal ideation, so I’m not sure if his kids being killed by a drunk driver is what pushed his mental health the wrong way, or if they were pre-existing conditions.

Regardless, although this guy was married with children, his children were killed, so being married and a parent was not a guarantee of constant happiness for him.

Being married, and I guess a father, didn’t bring him inner peace, joy, and all the other things so many conservatives (like Al Mohler and Brad Wilcox) say it will bring.

You can get married and have children and still be depressed or have other mental health problems, or your loved ones can still die.

Very sad story.

(Link): Man whose children were killed by drunk driver commits suicide a day after Father’s Day

by Jesse O’Neill

A Canadian dad whose three children were killed by a drunk driver in 2015 took his own life in the hours after Father’s Day.

Edward Lake’s wife Jennifer Neville-Lake shared the tragic news about her husband along with a photo of their three children — Daniel, Harry and Milly, who were 9, 5 and 2 when they died in the crash.

…A day before she shared a post with a picture of the children’s graves

Continue reading “Man Whose Children Were Killed by Drunk Driver Commits Suicide a Day After Father’s Day”

Another Misleading Christian Propaganda Piece About Marriage: ‘She Was Widowed With 3 Kids At 25 But God Had Plans For Her And A Widower To Find Love Again’

Another Misleading Christian Propaganda Piece About Marriage: ‘She Was Widowed With 3 Kids At 25 But God Had Plans For Her And A Widower To Find Love Again’

If this married couple is happy, I’m happy for them.

My problem is not with the couple particularly (well, maybe a little bit, but more on that way below), but my primary concern is that Christian outlets keep carrying these stories, stories which can be very misleading to single, Christian adults who read them and wonder,
“Why did God bless these two in this story with a spouse, but God never sent me a spouse? Where is the spouse I spent years praying for and trusting in God for?”

There are a lot of Christian women out there who wanted to be married, but it never happened for them, including devout Christian women who followed all the evangelical, Baptist, or otherwise Christian, rules they were taught to follow when younger on how to get married.

A devout Christian single who desires marriage can live a godly life, devoted to Jesus, and follow all the “how to get married” books and magazine articles by Christians – but still never get married. Such a person can find him or herself single into his or her 30s, 40s, 50s, or older.

I don’t see too many Christians or publications admit to that possibility and reality – and it’s not just me. In my years of blogging here, I’ve seen many other single, Christian women (and some men) say they are in the same situation, and not just online but on occasionally on Christian television shows that take viewer questions for advice.

I have a lot more to say below this link and excerpts, so please keep reading and scrolling:

(Link): She Was Widowed With 3 Kids At 25 But God Had Plans For Her And A Widower To Find Love Again

Excerpts:

By Mel Johnson On June 23, 2022

Brittany and Daniel Brooker were both widowed at young ages and both had small children to raise. But God led them through their grief to one day find love again as the Brooker Bunch!

At weddings, a couple vows to love one another for “as long as they both shall live.” And most of us assume that life will span multiple decades.

Sadly, though, that’s not always the case. Sometimes lives are cut short. And that was the case for the first marriages of Brittany and Daniel Brooker.

Continue reading “Another Misleading Christian Propaganda Piece About Marriage: ‘She Was Widowed With 3 Kids At 25 But God Had Plans For Her And A Widower To Find Love Again’”

What do Female Incels Really Want? By Kaitlyn Tiffany

What do Female Incels Really Want? By Kaitlyn Tiffany

(Link): What do Female Incels Really Want?

Excerpts:

By Kaitlyn Tiffany
May 12, 2022

“We were all ugly,” Amanda, a 22-year-old student from Florida told me, recalling the online community she found when she was 18. “Men didn’t like us, guys didn’t want to be with us, and it was fine to acknowledge it.”

This Reddit forum was called r/Trufemcels, and she commented there under the username “strangeanduglygrl.” Amanda didn’t post very often, but she checked in every day on the community of self-identified “femcels,” or involuntarily celibate women. (I agreed to refer to her by her first name only, to separate her current life from her former internet identity.)

They came to complain about the superficiality of men and the privilege of pretty women, and to share their experiences moving through the world in an unattractive body, which therefore disadvantaged them romantically, socially, and economically.

They were finding the modern dating landscape—the image-based apps, the commodified dating “market,” the illusory “freedom” to be found in hookup culture—to be unnavigable, and they talked about taking a “pink pill,” and opening their eyes to the reality that society was misogynistic and “lookist.”

Continue reading “What do Female Incels Really Want? By Kaitlyn Tiffany”

A New Start After Age 60: ‘Alone for the First Time in My Life, I Learned How To Be Happy’ (A Woman’s Husband Divorces Her After 40 Years of Marriage)

A New Start After Age 60: ‘Alone for the First Time in My Life, I Learned How To Be Happy’ (A Woman’s Husband Divorces Her After 40 Years of Marriage) by Paula Cocozza

In the article below, the woman (who is in the UK) also mentions that when she was younger, her father died, which had a big impact on her and her mental health.

(Link): A new start after 60: ‘Alone for the first time in my life, I learned how to be happy’

Excerpts:

by Paula Cocozza

Marian Elliott was devastated when her husband left her after almost 40 years together. New friends have helped her rebuild her confidence – and enjoy her freedom

May 16, 2022

Marian Elliott was 22 when she left the family home to be with her husband-to-be. So when he left her nearly 40 years later – shortly after her 60th birthday – she found herself living entirely alone for the first time.

Elliott had thought she could picture the next stage in her life. She and her ex had worked hard to pay off their mortgage.

“We were about to enjoy our retirement together,” she says with a heavy sigh. Now there was nothing but uncertainty. “I felt such pain, I didn’t know what to do with it,” she says.

Continue reading “A New Start After Age 60: ‘Alone for the First Time in My Life, I Learned How To Be Happy’ (A Woman’s Husband Divorces Her After 40 Years of Marriage)”

Pakistan: Men Dig Up Grave of Teenage Woman and Rape Her Corpse, 17 Accused Are Being Interrogated

Pakistan: Men Dig Up Grave of Teenage Woman and Rape Her Corpse, 17 Accused Are Being Interrogated

Spencer’s work on this opens with many examples of Muslims who have had sex with dead bodies, and quotes from Islamic religious texts which shows it’s considered normal or kind of common place to engage in necrophilia:

(Link): Pakistan: Men dig up grave of teenage woman and rape her corpse, 17 accused are being interrogated – by Robert Spencer

Excerpts:

May 8, 2022
by Robert Spencer

… “There is no need to rewash a dead woman if her husband has sex with her after she dies….And there is no punishment for anyone who has sex with a dead woman or limits sex to sex with a dead woman.” (Abd Al-Hameed Al-Sharawani, Howashi al-Sharwani (Al-Qubra, Egypt: Al-Maktabah Al-Tojariah, 1983, vol. 1, p. 263)

…“There is no restriction against sex with a dead woman or an animal.” (Mohammad Al-Sherbini Al-Khateeb, Al-Iqna3 fi Hal al-Faz: Abu Shoja’a (Beirut: Dar al-Fikr, 1994, vol. 2, p. 521)

…“Moroccan Cleric Abd Al-Bari Al-Zamzami: Husbands May Have Sex with Dead Wife’s Corpse; Women May Use Carrots as Vibrators,” MEMRI, March 24, 2012 …

(Link): Pakistan: Unidentified men dig up the grave of a teenage woman and rape her corpse, 17 accused being interrogated, investigation underway

 Attaullah Tarar, the deputy secretary-general of the Pakistan Muslim League (PMLN), took to Twitter on May 6 to inform that 17 suspects are being interrogated regarding the case.

May 7, 2022

On May 5, Thursday, some unknown men dug out the corpse of a teenage girl and raped it in the Chak Kamala village in Gujrat, Pakistan.

Attaullah Tarar, the deputy secretary-general of the Pakistan Muslim League (PMLN), took to Twitter on May 6 to inform that 17 suspects are being interrogated and the investigation of the case is being done as per scientific methods.

Continue reading “Pakistan: Men Dig Up Grave of Teenage Woman and Rape Her Corpse, 17 Accused Are Being Interrogated”

Studies on Falling Out of Love and Breaking Up and How to Recover From a Break Up – Research by Dr. Helen Fisher

Studies on Falling Out of Love and Breaking Up and How to Recover From a Break Up – Research by Dr. Helen Fisher

(Link): A relationship expert reveals the best ways to get over someone

Helen Fisher, biological anthropologist and author of “Anatomy of Love,” says heartbreak has physiological effects on our minds and bodies. There’s a scientific reason it hurts so much.

(Link): Why Breaking Up is So Hard, and How to Cope

Excerpts:

by Kelsey Chun
Feb 2020

There’s science behind a broken heart—but recovery is possible

…  Research has shown why our biology makes breaking up so hard for us, but thankfully it has also provided some helpful tips on what to do if you find yourself in that situation.

… one can better understand the unfortunate aftermath if a romantic relationship should end; it’s something akin to a drug withdrawal. Dr. Fisher and her colleague Lucy Brown also did research on people’s brains after they had just been broken up with, and their findings are in line with Dr. Fisher’s previous research.

While looking at images of their exes during MRIs, three brain regions light up in these heartbroken people: the first is the same brain region that lights up when someone is in love.

Dr. Fisher explains the meaning of this in her TED talk [(Link): The Brain In Love], “When you’ve been dumped, the one thing you want to do is forget about this human being and then go on with your life, but no, you just love them harder.” That brain system is the reward system, and it only becomes more active when you can’t get what you want—a loving partner.

[Self Care Tips After a Break Up]

…While manicures and shopping sprees are certainly nice, real self-care is about taking care of your own emotions, which often looks like being kinder rather than harsher with yourself, letting yourself cry, or saying “no” to activities that might overwhelm you more easily.

On the other hand, self-care might also include doing more, such as getting involved in more activities, hobbies, or projects.

Continue reading “Studies on Falling Out of Love and Breaking Up and How to Recover From a Break Up – Research by Dr. Helen Fisher”

‘Wonder Woman’ Star Lynda Carter Honors ‘Vibrant’ Robert A. Altman After Losing Spouse of 37 Years

‘Wonder Woman’ Star Lynda Carter Honors ‘Vibrant’ Robert A. Altman After Losing Spouse of 37 Years

This goes to show that even if you marry, your spouse can die – of old age, a medical problem, in a car accident, what have you – which will leave you single again.

(Link): ‘Wonder Woman’ Star Lynda Carter Honors ‘Vibrant’ Robert A. Altman After Losing Spouse of 37 Years

The gaming CEO passed away in February 2021 at age 73

April 25, 2022
By Stephanie Nolasco | Fox News

Lynda Carter is determined to keep the legacy of her late husband Robert A. Altman alive.

The “Wonder Woman” star attended the TGen awards, an affiliate of City of Hope, where she was given the John S. McCain Leadership Award for her advocacy of research and clinical advances.

The 70-year-old took to Instagram on Monday and shared her spouse of 37 years passed away from a rare type of cancer that impacts the body’s normal production of blood cells.

Continue reading “‘Wonder Woman’ Star Lynda Carter Honors ‘Vibrant’ Robert A. Altman After Losing Spouse of 37 Years”

Chronic Pain and the Self Pity, Depression Trap

Chronic Pain and the Self Pity, Depression Trap

If you are someone who is currently in the grieving process because someone you love died within the last five years, some of the tips below by Dr. Trunzo (article: “The Best Life Possible”) about acceptance in regards to chronic health conditions may be useful to you as well in regards to your grief, so please scroll down to read that.


Don’t forget to see my two previous posts about Covert Narcissism, as those posts explain that sometimes, people with Covert Narcissism will either exaggerate or lie about physical or mental health illness to garner sympathy and attention from others, and they often have a “victim mentality.”

In particular, in (Link): this post about Covert Narcissism, scroll down to find the section entitled “The Psychosomatic.” (That section is located about half-way down that page.)

You’ll notice that a lot of the tips and advice in the first article below, which was reviewed by a medical doctor, echo and repeat the same set of tips and advice I have given to (Link): people I’ve known before, people who insist these tips do not work (though some of it worked for me or for other people, in regards to clinical depression), or they dismiss this advice as being nothing but mere “platitudes” or “pep talks,”, or, (Link): some of these people dismiss this type of advice on other grounds.

Recap on my situation:
I was diagnosed with clinical depression by a psychiatrist at a young age, had it verified by three additional psychiatrists as I got into my 30s.
I lived with depression for over 35 years, and largely found my way out of it (on my own), and I can tell you that escaping depression involved doing some of the very things mentioned in the articles below.

Other than lower back pain I’ve dealt with since a teen, I’ve not had chronic physical pain.

Chronic Physical Pain & Mental Health

From my research into the topic of chronic pain and mental health, I’m finding articles by people (some doctors, some lay persons) who live with a chronic pain condition who do talk about the possible slide into self pity, how to avoid it, and how to manage any depression that results from, or accompanies, the pain.

So obviously, things can be done to change here – it’s not as though a person is doomed with no recourse if they live with a physical health problem to necessarily stay in a hopeless, despondent emotional or psychological state (this is also true for physically disabled persons who (Link): must use wheelchairs)

(Link):  The best life possible by Joseph Trunzo

Excerpts:

Living with chronic illness is hard. But there are psychological techniques that make it possible to thrive even when ill

‘Don’t let what you can’t do interfere with what you can do.’
John Wooden (1910-2010), NCAA basketball coach

by Joseph Trunzo, professor of psychology at Bryant University in Smithfield, Rhode Island, and a clinical psychologist. He is the author of Living Beyond Lyme: Reclaim Your Life From Lyme Disease and Chronic Illness (2018).

—- — —-

Before Donna got her diagnosis, she thought of herself as a musician, a busy professional, a volunteer, a mother, a grandmother. After she got her diagnosis – Parkinson’s disease, at age 58 – she thought of herself as a patient.

The time she used to spend engaging in the things that gave her life meaning was eaten up by doctor’s appointments, diagnostic tests and constant monitoring of her symptoms, her energy, her reactions to medication. Her sense of loss was profound and undeniable.

Unfortunately, Donna’s experience is all too common. Heart disease, arthritis, multiple sclerosis, diabetes, depression, cancer, asthma, Crohn’s disease, cystic fibrosis, autoimmune disorders, fibromyalgia, chronic fatigue syndrome, Lyme disease: the list goes on.

I would guess that most people know someone close to them who is suffering from one of these debilitating chronic conditions, if not struggling with a diagnosis themselves.

However, as a clinical psychologist, I see many people trying to navigate the daily vagaries of chronic afflictions. I’ve worked with people who have been diagnosed with various forms of cancer, Parkinson’s, cystic fibrosis, Lyme disease, obesity, all manner of cardiovascular diseases, multiple sclerosis, brain injuries, paralysis and many other illnesses.

Naturally, I also see people on a regular basis who are dealing with chronic mental health issues, such as depression, anxiety, trauma, bipolar disorder and so forth.

The causes of these conditions are varied and multifaceted. The underlying factor for all of them, however, is that, in the absence of a cure, people want to live the best life they possibly can, regardless of their affliction or disability.

While each person and each condition presents its own set of challenges, there are some unifying principles in helping people who are suffering from chronic illnesses to live better, more meaningful lives.

In my practice, I approach these issues from a therapeutic perspective known as acceptance and commitment therapy, or ACT (said as the word, not the acronym). I encourage anyone dealing with similar issues to learn about this approach, as it has been helpful to my clients and countless others.

…Generally, living as rich and meaningful a life as possible when you are struggling with a chronic illness requires a great deal of psychological flexibility.

With chronic illness, rigidity in your thinking and behaviour is the greatest barrier to living well with your illness.

Continue reading “Chronic Pain and the Self Pity, Depression Trap”

The Love Story Behind This 2,500- Piece Beer Can Collection Up For Auction is Filled With Emotion

The Love Story Behind This 2,500- Piece Beer Can Collection Up For Auction is Filled With Emotion

(Link): The Love Story Behind This 2,500- Piece Beer Can Collection Up For Auction is Filled With Emotion

Dec. 2021
by Cortney Moore

There’s a 2,500-piece beer can collection that’s gone up for auction, and behind it, there’s a love story.

Luverne Kahl’s husband “Catfish” John Kahl collected beer cans in the 30-plus years of their marriage. John died in 2019 at the age of 83 after a two-year battle with Parkinson’s.

The unique auction item, which was first reported by The New Orleans Advocate, began in November and will conclude on Saturday, Dec. 11.

Luverne told Fox News she’s now ready to part ways with the collection after her home suffered damage from Hurricane Ida earlier this year.

The couple had previously rebuilt their home in Pearl River, Louisiana, following the devastation Hurricane Katrina left in 2005, and it took them a year to recover.

Continue reading “The Love Story Behind This 2,500- Piece Beer Can Collection Up For Auction is Filled With Emotion”

Couple Die of Covid, Leaving Behind Newborn and Five Children

Couple Die of Covid, Leaving Behind Newborn and Five Children

Such a sad story. Condolences to the family and friends of the couple.

For those of you who may visit this blog every so often – especially if you’re an unmarried adult who wanted to marry (and maybe have children too), but you find yourself single (and childless) into your 30s, 40s, or older, I think news stories like this one are eye opening.

Just because some people do marry (and have children) doesn’t mean it’s a happy life or a happy ending.

I have more news stories on my blog (see “Related Posts” below) of people who died shortly before or right after getting married! I have news stories of people who died in a car crash on their way to their own wedding and so on.

Here’s a couple who each died shortly within one another, not long after the wife gave birth.

I feel particularly bad for the children – to grow up with neither parent. 

And really, Christians who “hype” marriage (and parenthood) way too much, to the point they shame singles for being single and not having children – such as Al Mohler – need to stop doing so (as they sometimes do) by falsely painting this picture of “most to all of your problems in life will be solved if you just marry and have children.”

(Link): California couple die of Covid and leave behind 5 kids, including newborn daughter

September 13, 2021
by William Wong

Daniel Macias wanted to wait until he and his wife, Davy Macias, recovered from the coronavirus before naming their newborn daughter.

But about a week after giving birth, the mother died of Covid-19 complications. And nearly two weeks after she died, so did her husband.

Davy Macias was 37, and Daniel Macias was 39, Terri Serey, Davy Macias’ sister-in-law, told NBC News on Monday.

The couple, both of Yucaipa, California, left behind five children, ages 7, 5, 3, 2 and 3 weeks.

Continue reading “Couple Die of Covid, Leaving Behind Newborn and Five Children”