Avid Motorcyclist 39, Crashes and Dies Just Months After He Staged FAKE Accident to Propose to His Girlfriend

Avid Motorcyclist 39, Crashes and Dies Just Months After He Staged FAKE Accident to Propose to His Girlfriend

(Link): Avid motorcyclist, 39, crashes and dies just months after he staged FAKE accident to propose to his girlfriend

An motorcyclist died in a tragic in an accident just months after he staged his own accident to propose to his girlfriend.

Miguel Angel Pena, 39, was enjoying another ride along the Dominican Republic’s resort town of Las Terrenas with a group of other bikers when he lost control of his motorcycle on a highway on Friday.

Continue reading “Avid Motorcyclist 39, Crashes and Dies Just Months After He Staged FAKE Accident to Propose to His Girlfriend”

The Entitled, Insensitive Comments Left by Entitled Christian Mothers, and the Men Who Support Them, Under the Post ‘Don’t Ask Moms To Stand In Church This Sunday (Mother’s Day)’

The Entitled, Insensitive Comments Left by Entitled Christian Mothers, and the Men Who Support Them, Under the Post ‘Don’t Ask Moms To Stand In Church This Sunday (Mother’s Day)’

As of 2018, the snotty entitlement and insensitivity of some mothers – and Christian men who support them – continues.

I’ve been blogging about this topic for a few years now on this blog. It makes me sad to see this still going on.

DefendTheSheep (person on Twitter) tweeted out a link to this reasonable essay imploring Christians to be more sensitive towards those who find the Mother’s Day holiday painful. Link to that:

(Link): Don’t Ask Moms To Stand in Church This Sunday

My problem is not with the essay itself.

As a matter of fact, I encourage you to click the link above to visit the page and read it.

My problem was with some of the hideous comments various people left below the page.

Some of the comments were just incredibly insensitive or very mistaken about why some people find Mother’s Day – especially when it’s celebrated during church services – to be hurtful or stressful.

Christians often like to teach that parenthood and marriage are necessary to make people more giving and loving and compassionate, but that is not so. The married parents leaving comments under blog posts such as the one I am discussing here are very selfish and entitled – being parents has done nothing to make them more loving, caring, or empathetic.

Continue reading “The Entitled, Insensitive Comments Left by Entitled Christian Mothers, and the Men Who Support Them, Under the Post ‘Don’t Ask Moms To Stand In Church This Sunday (Mother’s Day)’”

Bride Battling Cancer Dies 18 Hours After Exchanging Vows

Joanne the widow lady (Link): was just crying or complaining to Christian show host Pat Robertson that her husband died after 37 years of marriage – how do you think this groom feels, that he only got EIGHTEEN HOURS with his spouse? (And women like me have ZERO HOURS with a spouse?)

(Link): Bride Battling Cancer Dies 18 Hours After Exchanging Vows

(Link): Bride battling breast cancer dies 18 hours after wedding

Bride battling breast cancer dies 18 hours after wedding. A Connecticut bride lost her battle with breast cancer just 18 hours after exchanging wedding vows with her husband. The former Heather Lindsay and David Mosher said, “I do” Dec. 22 in the chapel of St. Francis Hospital and Medical Center in Hartford.

(Link): Woman battling cancer dies hours after getting married

The story of a woman who died from cancer 18 hours after getting married has broken hearts across the world.

Heather Mosher, from Connecticut, married her husband, David Mosher a few days before Christmas, after the couple brought the wedding forward out of fears Heather wouldn’t make it to their planned ceremony on 30 December.

Continue reading “Bride Battling Cancer Dies 18 Hours After Exchanging Vows”

Joanne The Widow Lady Wants to Know Why God Didn’t Answer Her Prayer to Keep her Husband With Her

Joanne The Widow Lady Wants to Know Why God Didn’t Answer Her Prayer to Keep her Husband With Her

Several months ago, the viewer question segment of the 700 Club’s show was called “Bring It On,” but for whatever the reason, they changed the name of the segment to “Your Questions, Honest Answers.”

On today’s (January 3, 2018) program, a woman named Joanne wrote Pat Robertson with this question (video below). I will type up a transcript of her letter (which was read aloud by the lady co-host) and then I will opine about the letter below the transcript:

Viewer Question Transcript:

My husband and I were happily married for 37 years. Every single night I prayed to God thanking him for my husband and the life we had together.

I asked God to never take him from me, for I had hoped that we would grow old together.

Then one day out of nowhere, my husband was diagnosed with a terminal brain tumor. I was devastated and I felt like my sincere prayer must not have meant anything to God.

Continue reading “Joanne The Widow Lady Wants to Know Why God Didn’t Answer Her Prayer to Keep her Husband With Her”

Sex Robots Are Being Made to Look Like Customers’ Dead Wives

Sex Robots Are Being Made to Look Like Customers’ Dead Wives

I do not find this touching. It’s gross and weird.

(Link): Sex robots are being made to look like customers’ dead wives… and one firm insists it’s the best way to help with their grief

by G Harrison

For many people, the social aspects of owning a sexbot are far more important than the physical side of things

SEX robots have become so lifelike that bereaved men are flocking to order dolls designed to resemble their dead partners.

Continue reading “Sex Robots Are Being Made to Look Like Customers’ Dead Wives”

Man Seeking Soulmate After Wife Dies Threw 2,000 Messages in Bottles Into the Sea

Man Seeking Soulmate After Wife Dies Threw 2,000 Messages in Bottles Into the Sea

I feel bad for this guy. He loses his wife, does this message in a bottle thing, and a bunch of environmental grouches criticize him

(Link):   Widower, 49, who sent hundreds of messages in bottles in a search for romance finds locals don’t love his idea as they accuse him of LITTERING

(Link): Bottle man lands 50 potential dates

(Link):   Widower under fire for littering beaches with 2,000 messages in bottles

…Eighteen months after his wife, Julia, died from breast cancer, Craig Sullivan went on a mission — to find another great love.

…”That started me thinking. If I could find some good places to throw some bottles, they might wash up on your shore,” Sullivan wrote in a blog post. “You might open one and read a message.”

Continue reading “Man Seeking Soulmate After Wife Dies Threw 2,000 Messages in Bottles Into the Sea”

More 40-Something Single Women Falling Prey to Dishonest or Violent Men in Dating (says report)

More 40-Something Single Women Falling Prey to Dishonest or Violent Men in Dating (says report)

I don’t know how accurate this type of story is. Sometimes the media like to report ideas and leave the impression there is a huge crisis going on, because it generates panic and makes for good click-bait and gets them more views and hits.

For example:

(Link):  When Newsweek ‘Struck Terror in the Hearts of Single Women’ – Bogus Study Said Women Over 40 More Likely To Be Killed By A Terrorist Than to Marry

This story is in a UK-based paper. I’ve no idea how common this is in the United States vs. the UK. Some of the folks who left comments below the (Link): Twitter post felt that the article is “victim-blaming.” I don’t know if I took it that way or not.

I have posted other stories to this blog before of women who were killed by men they had met online, and one story about a guy who was robbed (and I think killed) by a woman he met on a dating site (she brought her male friends with her to the man’s house, and her friends killed him – she was part of the plot). I don’t think it’s necessarily “victim blaming” to remind people who use dating sites to use caution when meeting people through sites.

(Link):  The tragic story of Helen Bailey’s murder shows how easily an unscrupulous character can fool a lonely romantic by J. S-Porter

“At 49, I met and married a man within three months. It was a disaster, and I quickly realised I’d been hopelessly naïve. Sometimes the dream gets in the way of reality”

Excerpts:

A successful middle-aged woman was murdered by a partner she trusted implicitly. Helen Bailey’s story is shocking because it reveals how little she really knew about her partner of five years. How can such an intelligent person be so oblivious to the dark side of her lover’s personality?

Continue reading “More 40-Something Single Women Falling Prey to Dishonest or Violent Men in Dating (says report)”

Death, Grief, Marriage, Single Again, Soul Sleep, Christianity, Obnoxious Male Fixation on Female Looks

Death, Grief, Marriage, Single Again, Soul Sleep, Christianity, Obnoxious Male Fixation on Female Looks

I have several topics I’d like to address here. I’m going to discuss death, grief, dating, how men are too fixated on women’s looks, etc, and so on, all in the same post.

I learned from watching the Christian program “It is Written” today (Feb 2017) that the wife of Christian TV host Mike Tucker, Gayle, died. I’m not sure when the episode was first filmed or first aired.

You can read a transcript of that episode, “From Grief To Hope” (Link, off site): here.

You might be able to watch that very episode or one like it here: (Link, off site): Coping with Grief.

I see from an online obit that Gayle Tucker passed away in April 2016.

I am sorry for his loss.

I lost my mother, and it hurt a lot.

(Link, off site):  Gayle Tucker, Beloved Marriage Counselor on Faith For Today TV, Dead at 60

April 2016 –  The prominent Adventist television personality dies after a brief struggle with pancreatic cancer.

(Link, off site):   Beloved Christian TV Host, Couples’ Counselor Dead at 60

I learned a few years ago that the hosts and backers of “It Is Written” are SDAs (Seventh Day Adventists).

I also learned from a glance over google search results that Mike Tucker is a Seventh Day Adventist.

Part of SDA theology is something called “Soul Sleep,” a view that I totally disagree with and find discouraging and cruel.

Continue reading “Death, Grief, Marriage, Single Again, Soul Sleep, Christianity, Obnoxious Male Fixation on Female Looks”

Widow Lived With Husband’s Corpse For 9 Months, Says He Wanted To Be Eaten By Birds

Widow Lived With Husband’s Corpse For 9 Months, Says He Wanted To Be Eaten By Birds

So contra evangelical Christian claims, marriage doesn’t always or necessarily make a person better, more responsible, or more godly. Sounds like marriage makes people go a little loopy, as a matter of fact, if they’re willing to live with a corpse in the house for nine months.

(Note: I am not saying that all married people are nuts or violent. Usually on my site when I make sweeping statements or implications like that, it’s a retort to how a lot of Christians do this same thing towards singles or the childless all the time. Evangelicals and other types of Christians tend to lump ALL adult singles into the group of “lazy, selfish, weird, or loser”.)

(Link): Lafayette widow’s story at odds with official records

(Link): Widow Lived With Husband’s Corpse For 9 Months, Says He Wanted To Be Eaten By Birds

    Ila Solomon, a widow from Indiana, lived with her husband’s corpse 9 months after he died. The body of 88-year-old Gerald “Scooter” Gavan was found in their home on May 3. Solomon is still waiting if she will be charged for keeping her husband’s decomposing body.

    Solomon gave an interview and a tour of her home to RTV6 on Thursday. The 54-year-old widow showed the news team their living room carpet where her husband died.

    When the body was discovered, Solomon insisted that her husband had been dead for only 5 days, but authorities say otherwise. According to Tippecanoe County Coroner Donna Avolt, Gavan had been dead for over 9 months when he was discovered, Indy Star reports.

    According to the law, failure to report a dead body within 3 hours of discovery is considered a Class A misdemeanor, and is punishable by up to one year in jail. In Solomon’s case, it is up to the prosecutor to decide if the widow will be charged.

—————————-
Related post:

(Link): Marriage Does Not Make People More Loving Mature Godly Ethical Caring or Responsible (One Stop Thread)

Thirty Year Old Man Likes To Date and Have Sex with 80, 90 Year Old Women

Thirty Year Old Man Likes To Date and Have Sex with 80, 90 Year Old Women

I have never approved of May-December relationships, regardless of the gender situation.

I am grossed out by relationships that have more than a five year age gap (ten at the most). I wrote about that before in (Link): this post.

(Link): Thirty Year Old Man Likes To Date and Have Sex with 80, 90 Year Old Women

-‘Some guys prefer blondes, some brunettes – I like old ladies’: ‘Extreme toyboy’, 31, takes 91-year-old girlfriend home to meet his mother

-Kyle had first sexual experience with a 50-year-old aged 18

-Claims he has always been attracted to older women

-Currently dating five women aged over 60, including Marjorie, 91

-Says they have an active and satisfying sex life

-Often takes girlfriends home to meet him mother, 51

As a society, we’ve become used to May to September relationships – just look at Madonna and her latest backing dancer; Michael Douglas and Catherine Zeta-Jones and their 25-year age gap. No one bats an eyelid any more.

But one ‘exteme toy boy’ does raise a few eyebrows when he steps out with his lover – because baby-faced Kyle Jones, 31, is in a relationship with a 91-year-old great-grandmother.

Kyle, from Augusta, Georgia, dates numerous pensioners at the same time and even takes them home to meet his 50-year-old mother. For the last five years he has been in a ‘casual’ relationship with 91-year-old Marjorie McCool.

And despite the 60-year age gap, the pair have an active sex life and can’t keep their hands off each other.

Kyle said: ‘Everyone’s brain is wired differently, some guys prefer blondes, some brunettes, some like other guys – I like old ladies.’

The call centre worker was just 18 when he first acted on his attraction for older women and began a sexual relationship with a 50-year-old.

Now Kyle uses dating websites to find women as well as chatting them up in his daily life.

He said: ‘Most of the time, the average age I go for is between 60 and 80.

‘Whenever I’m trying to speak to an older woman, the first reaction I get is ‘you’re way too young’.

‘I find persistence is good so I tell them it’ll be fun.’

Although officially single, Kyle regularly sees up to five women at a time and takes them on dates – and even home to meet his mother.

In 2009 he met great-grandmother Marge – short for Marjorie – in the bookstore where she was working and asked for her number.

Marge, who had been single for 37 years since splitting with the father of her six children, agreed to go on a date.

She said: ‘In the beginning I got jealous of his other women but he keeps coming back to me and tells me I’m the best.

‘The physical side of our relationship is wonderful. I amaze myself, he amazes me. There’s nothing better.

…. And while many of the women he dates can’t believe such a young man would find them attractive, Kyle is adamant he does.

He said: ‘Often, the things women are so self-conscious about is what I’m into. I like the neck lines and wrinkles.

‘Women worry about their boobs sagging but I think the natural hang looks great. I’m really not a fan of plastic surgery.

…Kyle’s preference for the elderly has drawn criticism from those who see him as opportunistic.

He said: ‘The most common criticism I hear is ‘you’re after money’ or ‘you’re after inheritance’.

‘Or people think these women must be buying me things.

‘But it’s not true at all – I do this because I like it and they like it too. I’ve dated women from various ends of the financial spectrum, but it’s never about what they have.’

———————-
Related posts:

(Link): Creepy, wrong, immature and pathetic: older men chasing after much younger women

(Link):  Study:  Big Gaps in Age Can Turn A Marriage Sour in Just Six Years

(Link): Woman Burned To Death For Refusing Marriage Proposal To A Man Over Half Her Age

(Link):  Wife’s Shock As Husband, 26, Is Caught Cheating With a 72-Year-Old Lover at Premier Inn

(Link): What Is The #HusbandNotDad (hash tag)? Down The Rabbit Hole Of An Unlikely Hashtag by P. Frank

(Link):  Dear Abby: I Gave Up Dating, and 30 Years Later, I’m Lonely – letter from self-professing 70 year old guy who is overweight, says he prefers younger women and does not want to date women his own age

(Link):  ‘I Want My 2.3 Bonus Years’ – A.K.A., ‘Where do 50-year-old men get the strange impression that they could date a 23-year-old?’ by Mona Chalabi

(Link): What It’s Really Like to Be a Guy Who Only Dates Much Older Women by L. Moore 

(Link): Men Become ‘Invisible’ And Lose Sex Appeal At 39 – Article from Daily Caller

(Link):  How Dating In Your 40s Is Nothing Like Dating In Your 20s – via NY Post – A Secular Editorial Grasps what Married Christian Relationship Advice Givers Do Not

(Link): Ageism Vs. Age Preferences and Creepy Older Men (critique of post at another blog) 

(Link): The Bigger the Age Gap The Shorter The Marriage  / Divorce Rates Predicted By Age Differences

(Link): Avoid Dating Divorced Guys Who Are Dating on the Rebound – and Icky May December Relationships

(Link): Obnoxious, Condescending, Sexist, Pervy Esquire Editorial by 50-Something Year Old Man: “In Praise of 42 Year Old Women” – Condescendingly Reassures 40 Something Women He’d Sex Them Up

(Link): Follow Up – Reactions by Other Writers to Sexist, Condescending 50 Something Men Who Think They Are Final Arbiters of If Women Are Attractive Past Age of 40 (Re: Esquire Editorial by Junod)

(Link): Follow Up Part 2 – Reactions by Other Writers to Sexist, Condescending 50 Something Men Who Think They Are Final Arbiters of If Women Are Attractive Past Age of 40 (Re: Esquire Editorial by Junod)

(Link): Online Dating: Women Want Younger Men (article)

Christians Over Hyping Parenting – When All Identity is Wrapped Up In Being a Parent – Empty Nest Article

Christians Over Hyping Parenting – When All Identity is Wrapped Up In Being a Parent – Empty Nest Article

Not only is Christian culture guilty of hyping motherhood, but secular culture is as well.

The majority of girls in America are conditioned to be mothers when they are older. It is expected all women want to be mothers or will be mothers some day.

Christians in particular – especially the kook groups, such as patriarchy and quivering – teach that a woman’s only or best role is to be a wife and mother.

It’s one facet of codependency to base your entire identity in your relation to one or more other people (such as husband and children).

One issue is that some Christian women are so wrapped up in being a mother they never stop to think, “What if my child dies tomorrow,” or, “What will I do when my kid gets out of college and gets her own apartment.”

One of my aunts only had one child. He died in his early 20s, he was hit by a guy who fell asleep at the wheel. She had divorced the boy’s father years before.

This Aunt of mine was forced to live out her life alone after her son died. She could no longer define herself by the role “wife” or “mother” in the same way other women do who are still married or who have living children. She had to figure out who she was apart from the roles of “wife” and “mother”.

There is no guarantee your kid won’t get hit by a car, hit by cancer, or kidnapped and murdered. At the very least, your child will probably one day grow up and move out of your home.

I really don’t think churches and Christians in general think through their worship of motherhood often enough.

Not only do they raise Christian females with the expectation that if only they pray hard enough God will send them a husband, but they so enforce the “you will be a mommy” shtick so much, women are never taught how to cope with the possible reality they may remain single into their 40s and older, or, they may be infertile, or their kid may die young if they have a kid.

Here is an article about Empty Nest Syndrome.

It’s very dangerous for culture and churches to keep teaching women to define themselves by their relation to other people.

It is wrong and unhealthy for preachers and other Christians to teach women that their only or even primary meaning comes from being a wife and a mother. Husbands divorce or die, or you never get one at all and you stay single your whole life through. Kids die, become estranged from their parents and never phone them, or they move out and only visit on the occasional holiday.

By the way, when Christians keep hyping motherhood as much as they do, that is a form of Virgin Shaming or Singles Shaming. Churches need to venerate and respect adult virginity and singleness and being childless every bit as much as they do motherhood. That they do not, that they continually applaud motherhood but never cheer on singleness, is a form of singles of celibate shaming.

(Link): Dealing with a looming empty nest

Excerpt

    By Tracy Grant,
    Published: April 16

    My kids are going to graduate from high school in a matter of weeks and in a matter of months, they will head off to college.

    None of this comes as a surprise. I’ve known it intellectually pretty much since the day they were born. Knowing, as veteran-mom friends have warned, that “you’re really going to feel it when they are gone.” I’ve even written about my dawning realization of this next step of parenthood.

    But there’s a difference between knowing something in your head and knowing something in your soul. And this month, with actions that are positively quotidian, the knowledge is seeping into my soul.

    First came the realization that I would make the last Catholic school tuition payment. The only rational reason for feeling sentimental about this is that soon I’ll be pining for the (relatively) small payments associated with those years of education.

    Continue reading “Christians Over Hyping Parenting – When All Identity is Wrapped Up In Being a Parent – Empty Nest Article”

The Isolating Power of Family-Centered Language (How churches exclude singles and the childless) by E A Dause

The Isolating Power of Family-Centered Language

(Link): The Isolating Power of Family-Centered Language by E A Dause

Excerpts:

    I am 27, single, and my father has passed away. It seems everywhere I turn in the Christian world — churches, organizations, politicians — I am excluded, because I am not part of a family.

    A pastor comments excitedly on the number of new families joining his church. If I joined, would my membership be valuable? Respected Christian leaders urge us to support “family values.” Are values really tied to family units, or can I have values, too? A politician catering to evangelicals declares strong families to be the foundation of our nation.

    If he even knows I exist, a person without a family, does he even care about my vote?

    Christian magazines and organizations identify themselves by their emphasis on family. Where do I stand with them?

    A church bulletin asks me to bring enough food for my family to the church gathering. Am I even invited in the first place?

    Continue reading “The Isolating Power of Family-Centered Language (How churches exclude singles and the childless) by E A Dause”

Sexual Immorality and Five Other Reasons People Reject Christianity by D. Johnson

Sexual Immorality and Five Other Reasons People Reject Christianity

This mentions that some people become atheists because they were hurt in life and blame God – like several well-known atheists experienced the death of their fathers when they were young. However, I am focusing on the portion of the article that talks about how sexual immorality influences people to become atheistic.

(Link): Sexual Immorality and Five Other Reasons People Reject Christianity by D. Johnson

The pages discusses different reasons. Here is one.

    Immorality

    Now for the big one. Of all the motivations and reasons for skepticism that I encounter, immorality is easily the most common.

    In particular, sexual sin seems to be the largest single factor driving disbelief in our culture. Brant Hanson calls sex “The Big But” because he so often hears this from unbelievers: “’I like Jesus, BUT…’ and the ‘but’ is usually followed, one way or the other, with an objection about the Bible and… sex.

    People think something’s deeply messed-up with a belief system that says two consenting, unmarried adults should refrain from sex.” In other words, people simply do not want to follow the Christian teaching that sexual intercourse should take place only between and man and woman who are married, so they throw the whole religion out. The easiest way to justify sin is to deny that there is a creator to provide reality with a nature, thereby denying that there is any inherent order and purpose in the universe.

    Aldous Huxley admitted that this is a common reason for skepticism:

      I had motives for not wanting the world to have a meaning; consequently I assumed that it had none and was able without any difficulty to find satisfying reasons for this assumption….

      Those who detect no meaning in the world generally do so because, for one reason or another, it suits their books that the world should be meaningless.

      … For myself as, no doubt, for most of my contemporaries, the philosophy of meaninglessness was essentially an instrument of liberation. The liberation we desired was …liberation from … a certain system of morality.

      We objected to the morality because it interfered with our sexual freedom….

      There was one admirably simple method in our political and erotic revolt: We could deny that the world had any meaning whatsoever. Similar tactics had been adopted during the eighteenth century and for the same reasons. (Ends and Means, 270-273)

    Indeed, similar tactics have been used extensively up to the present day.

    If you are looking for two great resources that document the extent to which the work of the world’s “great” atheistic thinkers has been “calculated to justify or minimize the shame of their own debauchery,” (Spiegel, 72)

    I recommend Intellectuals by Paul Johnson and Degenerate Moderns: Modernity as Rationalized Sexual Misbehavior by E. Michael Jones.

    The bottom line is that these skeptical scholars didn’t reach their conclusions by following the evidence where it led.

    They didn’t “discover” that the world was meaningless and then proceed to live accordingly.

    They lived sinful lives (usually involving some type of sexual deviancy) and then produced theories that justified their actions. This connection between immorality and unsound thought is clearly scriptural.

    Paul tells the Ephesians that they

      “must no longer live as the Gentiles do, in the futility of their thinking. They are darkened in their understanding and separated from the life of God because of the ignorance that is in them due to the hardening of their hearts. Having lost all sensitivity, they have given themselves over to sensuality so as to indulge in every kind of impurity, with a continual lust for more” (Eph. 4:17-19)

    Paul blames futile thinking and a lack of understanding on hard hearts.

    When we compare this passage with Romans 1, it seems that immorality and bad ideas work together in a vicious cycle that spirals downward. Sin leads to false philosophies which then lead to more sin.

    … So Paul argues that the nature of reality is clear to everyone but people suppress the truth by their wickedness. Rebellious people become fools as they deny the obvious meaning of creation because of their sin. Their foolishness leads them to indulge in more immorality.

    Thus immorality is very closely linked to skepticism and we need to be aware that sin will almost always be at least an underlying issue in our conversations.

———————
Related posts this blog:

(Link): No Christians and Churches Do Not Idolize Virginity and Sexual Purity – Christians Attack and Criticize Virginity Sexual Purity Celibacy / Virginity Sexual Purity Not An Idol

(Link): Part 1 – No Man’s Land – Between Agnosticism and Christianity / Also: It’s Emotional Not Intellectual (Part 1)

Neither Fully Widow Nor Fully Wife – Married People Will Be Single Again

Neither Fully Widow Nor Fully Wife – Married People Will Be Single Again

I’ve blogged on this before: married people left single again in a sense because their spouse developed dementia.

The church – run by married couples – makes an idol out of marriage, treats singles like second class citizens, or doesn’t take notice of singles, and it never seems to enter their minds that one day their spouse will be dead, either of old age, or possibly prematurely in their 30s, 40s, 50s from an auto accident, cancer or some other incident or health problem.

Your spouse could divorce you when you’re both 38 years old – maybe he says he’s fallen out of love, or he wants to run off with another woman.

If a woman’s husband is physically or emotionally abusive, she may have to divorce him.

Being married now is not a guarantee you’ll be married tomorrow or five years from now.

This is one reason it is to the benefit of married people to keep and maintain friendships with other people outside their immediate family (like hey, single adults).

Here’s another article about married people being, in effect, in a manner of speaking, left single again because their spouse has dementia.

(Link): Neither Fully Widow Nor Fully Wife

    Alzheimer’s puts caregivers in painful in-betweens.
    Jamie A. Hughes, guest writer

… But for my grandmother, the outcome isn’t so promising, as her husband will continue to lose abilities with each passing year. She is one of 15 million people in the United States caring for someone with Alzheimer’s or another form of dementia.

According to a recent report by the Alzheimer’s Association, more than 5.2 million Americans are affected by this disease, and the number is expected to climb to 13.8 million by 2050.

… Women bear the brunt of this illness in more ways than one. Not only are we more likely to be diagnosed with Alzheimer’s disease, but we also shoulder the burden of being primary caregivers. (Between 60 to 70 percent of people nursing a loved one with this condition are female.)

…2 Corinthians 9:11 says that Christians are “enriched in every way to be generous in every way” (NKJV), but I lost sight of that in the confusion of shifting family dynamics.

My grandfather struggled to pray at family gatherings, so my uncle assumed the task. Another person absorbed his duties around the house. Others became the handyman, bookkeeper, and financial planner.

Though I did whatever I could to help my grandfather, I rarely spared a thought for my grandmother. I didn’t fully understand how this disease has eaten away at her life and sense of self.

I came to see that she, too, was mourning—both for herself and the man she’s loved for 58 years, the one she’s losing to a pitiless disease that scours memories from the gray grooves of his brain.

Continue reading “Neither Fully Widow Nor Fully Wife – Married People Will Be Single Again”

The Walking Dead television series – Virginity and Family – One of TV’s Most Popular Adult Characters is a Virgin and Single And Most Are Okay With That

The Walking Dead television series – Virginity and Family

My last post on this topic:

—- SHOW FAVORITE IS A VIRGIN AND SINGLE —-

As the cable series The Walking Dead moved along, character Daryl Dixon had only one living family member left, so far as the show has revealed to this point: his brother Merle Dixon. Merle was killed a couple of seasons ago.

In interviews, actor Norman Reedus, who plays Daryl on the show, assumes that the character is a virgin – yes, a virgin.

In real life, Reedus is currently in his mid-40s and was in a long term relationship with a model in his late twenties (they had a son together). It has not been fully verified on the show what Daryl’s age is, but I would assume Daryl is the same age on the show that Reedus is in real life.

But as far as his Daryl character, Reedus feels that due in part of Dixon’s abusive upbringing, he’s not had much exposure to women and dating. He spent much of his life living in the woods, hunting, and living off the land. Reedus says he plays the Dixon character as though the character has never had sex and is not a smooth Don Juan with the ladies.

The show writers so far (thank God!) have not caved in to the immense female fan viewer demand to pair him up with Carol, Beth, or anyone else on the show. I hope they keep it that way.

You can read more about this subject on these off-site pages (I have additional comments about this below these long excerpts):
(Link): ‘The Walking Dead’s’ Norman Reedus: Daryl is a ‘total virgin’

Excerpts:

    By Liz Kelly Nelson
    Oct 10th, 2011

    Daryl Dixon knows how to handle a crossbow and has no problem putting an arrow between the eyes of a zombie, but when it comes to romance, he’s a bit of a late bloomer.

    “I’m trying to play him like he’s a total virgin,” Norman Reedus tells Zap2it. “Like if someone were to try to kiss him he’d be like, ‘Eeeeee.'”

    Reedus (“The Boondock Saints”) plays Daryl on AMC’s smash hit, “The Walking Dead.” Although the character wasn’t in the original Robert Kirkman comic books, he’s become a fan favorite. If we were comparing this show to “Lost,” which would be wrong because they are two totally different beasts, he’s kind of like the Sawyer of the group: hot, dangerous and — deep down — a good guy.

    Continue reading “The Walking Dead television series – Virginity and Family – One of TV’s Most Popular Adult Characters is a Virgin and Single And Most Are Okay With That”

Elderly Widower Dude is a Slut Says Adult Daughter – Why Churches Need to Teach Celibacy Applies to Even Married People Not Just Under Age 25 Singles

Elderly Widower Dude is a Slut Says Adult Daughter – Why Churches Need to Teach Celibacy Applies to Even Married People Not Just Under Age 25 Singles

So this adult daughter writes to an advice columnist explaining that her elderly father lost his wife (her mother) a few years ago, and ever since, he has been a big slut. (Farther below, I have pasted in her letter to Dear Amy so you can read it for yourself.)

I’d like to point out that “slut shaming” happens to men too, but I usually only hear secular feminists complain that it happens to women.

The woman’s senior-aged father is sleeping around with numerous women, he has several girlfriends at a time, but keeps each girlfriend (GF) in the dark about all the other GFs.

The daughter is afraid someone, her dad, or one of the dad’s GFs, is going to get an S.T.I. (aka S.T.D.).

This is yet another reason Christians need to get over the mentality that teachings about sexual purity and celibacy are for young singles only.

Not only do you have never-married (or not- married- yet) adult singles over the age of 30 who are trying to remain sexually pure, there are plenty of whom are still virgins, but you get these married couples whose spouse dies at some point in their lives, and they go out and start having sex with a lot of people after the death.

Celibacy is not just for young singles, it’s for ~everyone~. !HELLO, Christian culture, HELLO preachers of America!

You have married couples where one partner loses his (or her) sex drive due to stress, physical health (illness), or one or both partners find the sex boring after several weeks or months. As a result, some marriage counselors are telling such partners to go have an extra-marital fling (an affair).

I wrote about that situation here:

      (Link):

Why Christians Need to Uphold Lifelong Celibacy as an Option for All Instead of Merely Pressuring All to Marry – vis a vis Sexless Marriages, Counselors Who Tell Marrieds that Having Affairs Can Help their Marriages

It’s not enough for churches to keep acting as though messages of sexual purity are for teens and college students only.

Another reason they need to step up: a lot of 20- somethings and 30- somethings today, ones who drift away from church or the faith now, reject a lot of the church’s teachings on sexuality – that is, the churches and preachers who even bother to teach that pre-marital sex is a sin at all, because many do not.

(See: (Link): Christian Preacher Admits He Won’t Preach About Sexuality / Sexual Sin For Fear It May Offend Sexual Sinners)

The problem is, a lot of these ex-Christians or uber- liberal Christian types feel that their conservative churches wrongly taught about sex. These types feel that the Bible does not speak out against sex outside of marriage, even though yes, it in fact does. So, they disregard about any and all limitations on sex at all.

Churches need to do a better job, and try a different approach of, speaking about sexual sin, because a lot of the 20-somethings are later rejecting or disregarding what they are hearing about sex in church when they later leave church.

The fact remains that even married adults need to hear sermons about sexual purity, because some of them are failing miserably at it.

If your husband takes a two week business trip, and you find yourself alone, are you going to sleep with your UPS delivery man, or next door neighbor, while the husband is gone?

If you are a married man whose wife is in the military, and she gets shipped overseas for a six month tour of duty, are you going to remain faithful to her, or whore it up with other women while she is away?

What if you’re 50 years old and your 50 year old spouse is physically disabled or gets early-onset dementia, are you going to be true to him or her, or start sleeping around?

Churches need to address those types of situations and stop assuming that sexual temptation and sin is something that besets ONLY 17 year old kids.

Here’s the letter:

Ask Amy: Randy widower worries his daughter

Dear Amy:

I’m really concerned my widower father is turning into something of a slut.

My mother passed away seven years ago, and then my father had the very unfortunate luck of having a girlfriend who succumbed to cancer a few years later.

I understand that he’s lonely, and needs affection that only a female companion would give, but he’s currently courting three women, none of whom know about each other.

I know it is none of my business, but I am actually frightened that these women he met online who so easily jump into bed with him will leave him with an STD.

I’ve heard that the spread of STDs is actually more prevalent among the older generation these days. What would you suggest I do to convince him that these trysts may be more than he bargained for, without overstepping boundaries?

He’s quite headstrong and rarely listens to me; what should I do?

Signed,
— Concerned daughter

You see, preachers need to be preaching about sex in such a way that even married people understand that sex outside of marriage is SIN.

Because evidently, there are a lot of married men who feel okay and fine cheating on their wives while the wife is alive, or like the man in the letter above, they feel just fine engaging in fornication, and with multiple partners, once the wife dies.

Here was Amy’s reply:

Dear Concerned:

I shared your question with a spokesperson for the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention, who responded:
“While CDC continues to find that STDs disproportionately affect younger people in the U.S., it is important to understand that many older Americans face unique prevention challenges (e.g., discomfort in discussing sexual behaviors with physicians and partners and discomfort discussing condom use). It is also important for physicians to assess older patients’ risk.”

Older men may not have gotten the memo about wearing a condom. In their randy youth, condoms were used for birth control; now they are vital disease control devices. Your father could become infected and/or infect his partners.

Onto his sluttiness. There is not much you can (or should) do about his choice to sleep around.

The women he is seeing may also be mutually consenting (slutty) elders, and while this prospect isn’t quite what you want for your dear dad — it is what it is and you may have to accept it and only remind him to speak to his doctor about his risks.

Sexual promiscuity can be a sign of depression, however. If you feel he is out of control, you must do your best to urge him toward a mental health evaluation.

———————————–
Related posts:

(Link): No Christians and Churches Do Not Idolize Virginity and Sexual Purity – Christians Attack and Criticize Virginity Sexual Purity Celibacy / Virginity Sexual Purity Not An Idol

(Link):  Sex and Alzheimer’s – Selfish, Perverted Husband Rapes His Alzheimer’s Wife

(Link): Married People Who Find Themselves Single Again – Spouses With Dementia / Married People Who Are Lonely

(Link): Widower to Advice Columnist Talks about Being Stereotyped by Married Couples or Ignored by Other Marrieds Since His Wife has Died

(Link): AARP post: How to Handle a Sexless Married Life – But Christians Promise You Great Hot Regular Married Sex

(Link): Horny Celibacy – Another Anti Virginity, Anti Sexual Purity Essay – Also discussed: Being Equally Yoked, Divorce, Remarriage

(Link): Grieving widow doesn’t need to start dating in order to heal (letter from advice column)

(Link): Widows and Childless and Childfree Have Better Well Being Than Married Couples and Parents says new study

(Link): “Family-ing” Single Adults by D. Franck – How Churches Can Minister to Single Adults
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To Tweet:

Elderly Widower is Slut Says Daughter – Y Churches Need Teach Celibacy 2 Married Pple Not Just Teens https://christianpundit.wordpress.com/2014/03/18/elderly-widow-dude-is-a-slut-says-adult-daughter-why-churches-need-to-teach-celibacy-applies-to-even-married-people-not-just-under-age-25-singles/ #Celibacy

“Family-ing” Single Adults by D. Franck – How Churches Can Minister to Single Adults

“Family-ing” Single Adults – How Churches Can Minister to Single Adults

(Link): “Family-ing” Single Adults

I don’t know about you, but as a single adult who has walked into churches alone, my experience has been more like Bob’s than the lady he mentions under “Sandy’s Experience,” which I won’t repeat on my blog page here.

    Pastors have a unique opportunity to attract and positively influence single adults. Here are specific strategies pastors can employ to build a single-adult friendly church.

    By Dennis Franck

    BOB’S EXPERIENCE — WILL HE RETURN?

    Bob arrived at church 10 minutes before the service began hoping to connect with someone to ease the butterflies in his stomach. It had been 3 years since he stepped into a church, but his recent separation and impending divorce helped him recognize his need to develop some sort of spiritual life. A few people in the lobby laughing together noticed him but seemed preoccupied.

    Bob quietly slipped into the back row hoping someone would speak to him. Others around him looked straight ahead as if they were in a trance … or were they just afraid to speak to someone they did not know?

    The service began: “Welcome to First Church. Let’s stand and sing about the love of God.” After a few songs and prayer, the leader asked people to say hello to each other. Bob turned to someone in front of him, but that person was already talking to someone else.

    After an awkward 10 seconds, a man and woman next to him said, “Are you new here? Did you come alone or is your wife here, too?” The word wife stirred feelings that were difficult for Bob, and several questions ran through his mind. Why assume I’m married? Why ask such a personal question? Do I stand out like a fifth wheel here?

    The men’s retreat promotion didn’t help either. The speaker mentioned the retreat was only a month away and that wives should be happy their husbands will come back better equipped to strengthen their marriages. Feelings of loneliness and emptiness flooded over Bob. He didn’t choose to end his marriage; his wife left him for another man.

    Bob hoped the sermon might offer some encouragement to help deal with his impending divorce. The essence of the sermon — family and marriage are God’s desire for us — caused him consternation and pain. His marriage was over.

    The pastor concluded his message by asking couples and families to stand for prayer. Bob noticed many adults didn’t stand, and he assumed they were either single or without their spouse that day. Nothing was said about those who didn’t have a spouse present. Bob didn’t enjoy the service and wondered if/when he would ever return.

    YOU MAKE THE DIFFERENCE

    Your church can make the difference by showing God’s love to others. Bob’s story portrays an experience far too common in many churches today. As a single adult, Bob needed to feel included and part of a family. Bob needed to be “family–ed.”

    “Family” is more than a noun; it is also a verb. Christians need to family each other, especially those who may not have a family due to death of a spouse, death of a marriage, relatives many miles away, or other reasons.

    Churches want everyone to become part of a church and feel included. Accomplishing this, however, requires more than hope. Single adults need the church to realize not all adults are married, and not everyone has family nearby.

    The church needs to understand that single adults want/need people to accept them, maybe even more than married adults who have each other.

    The church needs to know single adults benefit from meeting other single adults with whom they share common interests and needs.

    The unmarried benefit from church leadership using inclusive language that recognizes and affirms individuals representing the many types of marital status: married, remarried, never-married, formerly married, separated, single parent, etc.

    How can your church — the hands, feet, and voice of Christ — help single or single-again adults feel included? How can your congregation help them come to the knowledge of the truth of the gospel?

    Continue reading ““Family-ing” Single Adults by D. Franck – How Churches Can Minister to Single Adults”

Churches Ignoring The Olds: Increasing Population of Senior Citizens In America – Yet Churches Keep Obsessing About Kids and 20 Somethings

Increasing Population of Senior Citizens In America – Yet Churches Keep Obsessing About Kids and 20 Somethings

If you’re not married with a kid at home, most churches will ignore you and your problems and needs.

Many conservative Christians remain, above all, obsessed with married parents, followed by youth (see here), and special interest, tear-jerking groups (e.g., starving, third-world nation orphans, strippers, and people caught in sexual trafficking, etc).

Which is all fine and good, Christians, yes, should be helping orphans and the like… but not at the detriment of people in other groups who could also use a hand up.

I’ve noticed the peculiar habit of Christians to be willing to show compassion only to certain, limited groups – anyone who does not fall in their particular cherished groups (eg, strippers, pole dancers, and orphans) is persona non grata, and if you go to them for help, you will receive condescending, rude lectures about “count your blessings,” and “you have life no where near as hard as strippers and orphans, so no help for you, go suck it up.”

(Link): Increasing Population of Senior Citizens In America

    by S Simms

As Baby Boomers age, we are seeing an incredible growth in the number of people in a given age group at any one time. In fact, there are now more Americans that are at least 65 years of age than at any other time in our nation’s history.

This can have a number of impacts on society and is also a marker for things to come. In addition to having a greater number of members in the workforce, senior citizens can also help project the increased longevity of our country moving forward.

According to a new census bureau report, there were over five million more people age 65 and older living in the United States in 2010 than in 2000. This also represents an increase of over 37 million people than in 1900.

As we know, advances in medicine, technology and our species’ ability to adapt to changing conditions have contributed to our increased life span. In order to get a full understanding of the senior citizen demographic in the U.S., you can take a look at some of the statistics from the census report.

Senior citizens make up 13 percent of the populations while those age 64 and under comprise 87 percent.

As we get older, females significantly outnumber males in our population.
The largest percentage of elderly people live in the Northeast, while the elderly population is growing the fastest in the West.

——————-
Related posts this blog:

(Link): Mature Christians Need to Stop Allowing the Under 30 Crowd to Direct the Entire State of Christian Affairs

(Link): Elder / Senior Abuse and Neglect – Christians need to stop worshipping youth – there are other needy groups out there

(Link): Churches Idolize Youth But Do Nothing to Protect Them

(Link):  Ministering to the Unmarried at Home and Abroad by C. Darnell (article focuses on middle aged, never married adults and ministering to the elderly)

Power Point, Boring Churches, It’s all about Jesus, Church Quitters, No Community, Selfish Preachers, Churches As Stalkers / (Re: Why Some Drop Out of Church)

Power Point, Boring Churches, It’s all about Jesus, Church Quitters, No Community, Selfish Preachers, Churches As Stalkers / (Re: Why Some Drop Out of Church)

(Link): How Power Point is Ruining Higher Ed

That page has one slide with screen shots of various tweets by various college students complaining about their professor’s over use of Power Point, including:

    -Being a college professor would be easy. Read off a Power Point you made 10 years ago and give online quizzes with questions you googled.

    -College basically consist[s] of you spending thousands of dollars for a professor to point at a Power Point and read the bullets.

    -I hate when a professor makes class mandatory and reads straight from the Power Point instead of actually teaching… I can do that at home

There are many reasons I no longer attend church and am not eager to ever go to another one ever again, and that is one of the reasons.

Church is boring. (And it’s not personal; churches tend to be impersonal.)

I feel that is a perfectly legitimate criticism of church: church is boring.

I am not saying that from a bratty, entitled, immature, 10 year old kid mentality.

Do not misunderstand. I am not arguing that the only thing a person should look for is entertainment at church.

There are already too many churches today that try to draw in crowds by entertaining them with rock bands, coffee shops in the church building, and gimmicks, primarily the moronic “seeker friendly” churches. That is not what I am advocating.

I’ve read criticisms of the present church model that argue church as we know it today is not how it was when Christianity first began. The first churches were groups of Christians sitting around in someone’s home discussing God, singing hymns, sharing each other’s problems … everyone was invited to participate in those meetings.

A “church service” back at the start of the Christian faith did not consist of one guy at a podium reading verbatim from the Bible, or, in the case of seeker friendly churches, one guy at a podium spouting off personal anecdotes and funny one-liners and pep talk advice while the congregation (the captive audience) sat there in silence.

By the way: the “worship” part of evangelical / Baptist church services don’t uplift me. They consist of people looking straight ahead at a big screen with text on it that is very repetitive. Some people (though this is rare at Baptist churches), put their hands up and wave them around.

I have never felt moved during these music segments at church, and I abhor them. I wish churches would drop the music segments – at least the ones where the entire congregation is expected to participate.

The music sections where some lady or guy stands at front and sings while I sit and listen don’t bother me as much. I don’t like the parts where myself and everyone else is commanded to get on their feet and sing along to words on a big screen.

I am not against music in and of itself, I am saying it feels out of place during a church service. I’ve never felt closer to God during the music part. I don’t see how me mumbling a few simplistic lines from a song honors God.

If anything, the music bits make me feel MORE hollow and empty, because there is this expectation by other Christians that you’re supposed to feel all warm and fuzzy and so, so close to God during the music, or you’re supposed to be basking in the greatness of God, or whatever.

I look around in some churches I’ve been to during the music bits (including one large, non denominational, charismatic church) and see some people with eyes closed, arms uplifted, swaying back and forth. Those types look like they are really getting something from the music.

I hate the music segments. I’m always waiting for them to end the moment they start.

At any rate, church is boring and impersonal.

I am not a supporter of shallow sermons and a rock band – the gee whiz environment that is prevalent in 90% of American churches today. I am not arguing that the antidote to “boring church” is to inject more excitement via rock bands and more coffee shops.

At the same time, though, I have been to one or more earnest churches where the preacher basically reads straight from the Bible – and that is boring. I can do that at home.

I can read the Bible myself and sometimes do, even in the midst of my agnosticism and trying to figure out if I want to remain a Christian at all anymore. (I should explain I don’t read the Bible nearly as much as I used to. I only read very small portions now, every so often.)

I am literate. I am college educated. I can sit at home and read the Bible, I don’t need some guy at a podium on a Sunday morning reading 90% of the Bible to me.

Even the churches that make entertainment a basis bore me. I’ve been to a few Baptist churches, large ones, that have gigantic video monitors and rock bands, with a preacher making jokes and pop culture references in his sermons, and I was still bored out of my mind.

One of the reasons I get bored at church is that there is no “back and forth.” There is no room for me to participate. I am not able to enteract with the pastor or other people. (This is the opposite of my issue with music segments: I prefer to sit out of music performances at church. I hate participating in music at church – but I do want to participate in lessons.)

For those of you who say that is what Sunday School is for – no, that has not been my experience.

In most Sunday School classes I have visited, there is already a pre-planned curricula, a published workbook from “Lifeway” that the class’s Sun. Sch. teacher reads from, or uses as a guide.

It’s not that I object to some pre-planning. I am not saying that use of a guide or workbook is necessarily wrong. If you are a Sun Sch teacher who wants to come up with a plan or topic for the class to discuss beforehand, I am fine with that to a point.

What I don’t like is an hour-long Sunday School class that is 95% a teacher reading from a Life Way workbook, and not much more.

Continue reading “Power Point, Boring Churches, It’s all about Jesus, Church Quitters, No Community, Selfish Preachers, Churches As Stalkers / (Re: Why Some Drop Out of Church)”

Think men on online dating sites are dodgy? Meet the sex-mad women! (Brit article) (One man mentions that his marriage was sexless for years)

Think men on online dating sites are dodgy? Meet the sex-mad women! (Brit article)

This is interesting to me, because Non Christian and Christian culture insist that only men want sex while women do not.

Men are portrayed as wanting sex or liking sex, but women are portrayed as hating sex or being un-interested in it.

One of the men interviewed says his marriage was sexless for several years.

LOL! Christians lie through their teeth when they tell virgins to “wait for marriage for sex, the sex will be great.” No, it’s not. Some people don’t have any sex after marriage.

Some of the dudes interviewed admit that they had affairs on their wives. One guy who is 44 or 45 said his wife died when she was 39.

From a British site:
(Link): Think men on online dating sites are dodgy? Meet the sex-mad women! (Brit article)

Excerpts.

    Four men explain that it’s not just male oddballs you find on the Internet

    Being a widow and single fatherhood have affected their online dating lives

    Undeterred by their dating mishaps, they are still looking for love online

    By ANTONIA HOYLE
    PUBLISHED: 19:09 EST, 29 January 2014 | UPDATED: 19:09 EST, 29 January 2014

    We’ve all heard about the bad behaviour of men who date online: the married ones just out for casual sex, the ‘successful businessmen’ who turn out to be minicab drivers and the ‘spontaneous risk takers’ who are, in truth, crashing bores.

    But as it is reported that one in every five relationships now begins via the web, four men turn the tables and reveal to Antonia Hoyle their often hilarious encounters with women looking for love…

    Tears when I turned down sex

    Peter Jones, 45, an author from Southend-on-Sea, Essex, started internet dating seven years ago after his wife Kate, an entrepreneur, died suddenly of a brain haemorrhage, aged just 39.

    My date interrupted my nervous small talk to ask about the platinum band on my finger.

    ‘It’s my wedding ring,’ I said.

    Looking at her horrified expression, I added hastily: ‘My wife died.’

    Her disgust turned to sympathy, but it was an awkward introduction to internet dating.

    The next day I changed my profile to read ‘widowed a few months ago’. I didn’t want to make a big deal of it, but I hoped a brief summary of my marital status would explain my presence online.

    I also hoped, selfishly, it would persuade my dates that I wasn’t to blame for my single status; that there was a legitimate, if tragic, reason.

    Kate had suffered a sudden brain haemorrhage a year earlier in September 2006. We’d been married two years and her death left a gaping hole in my life. I couldn’t imagine finding anyone to replace her, but I knew she would want me to be happy.

    I naively thought internet dating would be easy. I had no idea what a thick skin I’d need.

    When I wasn’t ignored, it often felt as if I were on a production line. One woman I met in a bar early on claimed haughtily that she’d been out with a man called Mike the day before and was meeting another called Steve the following day.

    I was sandwiched between the two! I told her it didn’t feel very special, but she didn’t care.

    I slept with two women in those early months; both after our first dates. Neither answered my calls afterwards.

    The sense of rejection following such physical intimacy was awful, prompting me to instigate a ‘no sex on the first date’ rule.

    ‘One 40-something secretary burst into tears at the end of an otherwise enchanting evening because I wouldn’t sleep with her’

    ‘I’ve spent the day cleaning my house and getting ready,’ she sobbed.

    Sadly, a date in 2008 with a 35-year-old mature student that blossomed into a promising relationship ended after because she was jealous of Kate.

    She wanted me to get rid of her picture from my wallet and mantelpiece. I refused, determined to keep Kate’s memory alive.

    For all the setbacks, my confidence grew. Last year, I uploaded a better profile picture; women, I learned, like men to look moody.

    Soon, I was inundated. And I’ve learned to be savvy.

    One 45-year-old sent me a picture of herself six months ago posing stark naked in bed.

    After staring at my screen wild-eyed in horror, I spotted a tiny tattoo of a tiger on her shoulder. It provided my get out clause. ‘I’m terribly sorry, I have a phobia of tattoos,’ I emailed.

    For the past two months, I’ve been seeing a writer four years my senior. I’m hoping my search may be over. I have also written a book, How To Start Dating And Stop Waiting, which is being published on Valentine’s Day.

    I still wear my wedding ring, and I’ll never forget my wife, but I’m happy again and, of that, she would be proud.

    Continue reading “Think men on online dating sites are dodgy? Meet the sex-mad women! (Brit article) (One man mentions that his marriage was sexless for years)”