Married South Dakota Couple Die of Cancer Hours Apart on the Same Day – Marriage Doesn’t Guarantee Happiness, Great Health

Married South Dakota Couple Die of Cancer Hours Apart on the Same Day – Marriage Doesn’t Guarantee Happiness, Great Health

Such real life stories blow the lid off conservative marriage and nuclear family propaganda. I’m a conservative myself, and I am not against marriage or the nuclear family, but so many other conservatives have elevated marriage, parenthood, and the nuclear family to such an absurd degree that they’ve deified it.

Studies have shown that marriage does not make people healthier or happier, but I’ve seen some conservatives, including Christian ones, such as Al Mohler, gleefully (gleefully!) share inaccurate studies that claim to show that single adults are unhappy, miserable, and die younger.

Imagine how perverse and deep into pro-marriage and pro-nuclear family propaganda and idolization you have to be to TAKE DELIGHT in studies that (falsely) purport to show that single adults are unhappy or die younger.

Look at the married couple in the example here – being married (and they had children too) didn’t guarantee them a super long life and never-ending bliss. They’re both dead of cancer in their 50s.

(Link): South Dakota EMS worker, 58, and his ‘soulmate’ wife, 52, both die of different forms of cancer just 10 hours apart – two days before Christmas – leaving their three children devastated

Dec 27, 2022
by Keith Griffith

A married couple in their 50s from South Dakota both died of cancer within 10 hours, two days before Christmas, leaving their three children distraught.

Steve Hawkins, 58, and Wendy Hawkins, 52, died from different types of cancer in the same hospital in Yankton on Friday, family members said.

Steve had been battling the disease for five years, while Wendy died after a shorter illness, according to a statement confirming the deaths from the Yankton County EMS, which Steve had overseen since 2009. It remains unclear what type of cancer each of them had.

Continue reading “Married South Dakota Couple Die of Cancer Hours Apart on the Same Day – Marriage Doesn’t Guarantee Happiness, Great Health”

A Husband and Father Died on Thanksgiving After Flames Burst Over His Body When Hospital Staff Used Defibrillator Paddles – Wife Relied on Dead Husband’s Social Security

A Husband and Father Died on Thanksgiving After Flames Burst Over His Body When Hospital Staff Used Defibrillator Paddles   – Wife Relied on Dead Husband’s Social Security

 Being married and a father didn’t save this guy.

His wife is now alone again. Marriage didn’t ultimately make her happy or protect her from loss and stress.

Also, Complementarian Christians and anti-Feminist conservatives are in error to brainwash women into thinking they can or should always count on a husband to rescue them, pay their way, etc, because what happens if that married woman doesn’t have a career of her own, no savings, and her husband dies, and she was relying on his income or social security (as was the case here)?

I am a conservative, I’ve never been a feminist, but, I also do not buy into the usual sexist, backwards propaganda other conservatives push on to women about marriage and motherhood, either.

Other conservatives think the way to ‘own the libs’ on these issues is to stupidly go in the 180 degree (opposite) direction of neo-marxist, anti-motherhood feminist, and progressive views,
and then “double down” even more on marriage, natalism, and motherhood.

They’re actually creating more problems than they’re solving with that approach, but that is their comfort zone, and they seem determined to stick to it.

This woman, if she had a career of her own and savings, might not have fallen into this situation.
And Christian Patriarchists and Complementarians actually double down on this faulty approach of advising or pressuring women to be nothing but stay at home wives and mothers, leaving them with possibly no fall-back income by which to pay their bills, if their husband dies or leaves them.
It’s very unwise advice or an unwise way to approach life.

(Link): A Tennessee husband and father died on Thanksgiving after flames burst over his body when hospital staff used defibrillator paddles

by Katie Balevic
Sat, December 3, 2022

    • A Tennessee man died after he caught on fire while hospital staff used a defibrillator on him.
    • The man’s wife was in the room when her husband caught ablaze, telling WKRN that “it just blew up.”
    • The hospital system said they are reviewing the “functionality of equipment” following the incident.

A father died in Tennessee on Thanksgiving day after he caught on fire as hospital staff attempted to use a defibrillator on him.

Bobby Ray Stark was bedridden for seven years and relied on his wife of 35 years, Kathy Stark, for care, according to WKRN. He went to the hospital for a foot infection and bed sores last month was later transferred to TriStar Centennial, where he coded and staff tried to revive him with a defibrillator, Kathy told the outlet.

“Then they started the paddles, and it just blew up, everything,” Kathy told WKRN. “I saw that, and I just burst out.”

Kathy told the outlet that she watched the flames cover her husband’s body.

Continue reading “A Husband and Father Died on Thanksgiving After Flames Burst Over His Body When Hospital Staff Used Defibrillator Paddles – Wife Relied on Dead Husband’s Social Security”

Guy Cheats On His Wife And Divorces Her, Expects Her To Mother His Kids From The Affair After His Second Wife’s Death

Guy Cheats On His Wife And Divorces Her, Expects Her To Mother His Kids From The Affair After His Second Wife’s Death

So what we have here is a guy who had an affair on his first wife.

(A sixteen year old girl wrote in asking for advice about all this. This guy she’s talking about is her father.)

This guy and Wife 1 had two children together, a boy and a girl.

Wife 1 divorced him (or he divorced her), and the guy married his mistress, who became Wife 2, “Kate.” 

The guy and Kate had two kids together, “Ellie” and “Tommy.”

Ellie was a product of the guy’s affair – that is, while this guy was married to Wife 1, he committed adultery with Kate, and Kate got knocked up with Ellie. Tommy, the boy, was born AFTER the guy married Kate.

After X number of years of marriage, Kate died. 

Now, the two kids of Kate and the guy (Ellie and Tommy) miss their mother and miss having a maternal figure in their lives, and they – and the ex Husband (their biological father) – are now demanding that Wife 1 act as their mother and start including them in holidays, “babying” them, acting maternal towards them, and what not.

Wife 1 and her kids from the first marriage want nothing to do with this arrangement. (And I don’t blame them.)

If I remember right, Kate’s family cut ties with Kate and the guy and their two kids (Ellie and Tommy) because they were upset, offended, or angry that Kate was a mistress who stole this guy away from his first wife. 

Look, I feel for those kids (Ellie and Tommy). It has to be difficult to lose your mother especially at a young age, but it’s not Wife 1’s responsibility to step up to the plate to “mother” the two kids popped out by Former Mistress Kate (who became Wife 2). 

I think that the dad (the ex husband) is entitled here – very entitled. It’s bad enough this ass hat cheated on Wife 1 with Kate, but he’s also now demanding that Wife 1 take over “mother” duties for the kids he and Kate had together.

Let me tell you – if you’re a single woman on a dating site or app, watch out for things like this.

Dating a parent (a person with children from a previous marriage) can be a huge mistake. This guy is probably on dating apps and sites right now, seeking Wife 3, or, if he’s not on dating sites now, he will probably join one in the future.

On any of his dating site profiles, he will probably omit that he lost Wife 1 via divorce due to his affair with “Kate.” He’ll leave that out, and just expect YOU to baby and take care of his children by Kate.

Avoid guys like this. Avoid, avoid, avoid. It’s better to stay single than get mixed up in taking on responsibilities and selfish, irresponsible, entitled ass clowns like this guy.

It’s not Wife 1’s job or duty to be a care taker and/or free therapist to his two children by Kate who are probably in the grieving process.

This father in this example needs to be spending time with both his children, attending to their emotional needs as they are grieving their mother. He also probably needs to take them each to separate, regular therapy sessions for a couple of years, so they can talk and cry to a therapist and work through their grief.

He may also want to try signing them up for free Grief Share meetings, that tend to meet regularly at churches around the nation (Grief Share meetings are free). They can sit in a circle of other people and talk through their feelings of loss and get their emotional needs met that way.

I do feel bad for the kids who are currently around ages 9 and 11. At that age, all they know is, their real mom is gone, they are grieving her, and they are wanting a maternal figure they can go to.

From their perspective, they aren’t going to see why it’s a big deal for the step-mom to step up and act as their mother now. I can totally understand from THEIR view why and how they can feel that way.

It’s a sad situation… because from the adult perspective, the step-mother owes the 9 and 11 year old nothing, but the kids are going to have a difficult time understanding or accepting that. The choice is hers, the adult woman, as to whether or not take on the role of acting like a maternal figure to them.

Sounds to me as though this guy is selfish and doesn’t want to do any parenting; he just wants to dump the two kids off at the ex-wife’s (Wife 1’s) house and have her cater to them as they cry and weep over their dead mom.

If this guy wants his second batch of two kids to have a mother, he needs to get re-married. It’s not the responsibility of Wife 1 to “act as a mother figure” to his second set of kids by his mistress Kate. That this guy would even THINK this is acceptable is a clue to me he’s probably a narcissist. 

This dad should stop using his 16 year old daughter by Wife 1 as a pawn in all this. He’s going to her, the teen daughter, to get her to try to convince Wife 1 to be a mother figure to his second set of kids. 

Also: notice how being married and a father did NOT make this man more ethical, responsible, mature, or godly.

(Link): Guy Cheats On His Wife And Divorces Her, Expects Her To Mother His Kids From The Affair After His Second Wife’s Death

Excerpts (the site summarizes the story while also providing screen shots of the original poster’s text):

by Konstancija Gasaitytė and Monika Pašukonytė

…Despite thinking that family is something that makes us feel safe and secure, sometimes because of certain twists and turns, it tends to fall apart.

Having this in mind, Reddit user @u/Affectionate_Kick521 decided to share the situation she found herself in that involved her parents and siblings.

The story which received more than 12k upvotes soon started a discussion online about how parents should behave in situations like this and how kids shouldn’t be the ones telling their parents how to deal with difficult circumstances. 

[Their source: (Link): AITA for saying I don’t care if my half siblings feel left out because it’s not my mom’s job to mother them?]

The 16-year-old author of the post started her story by sharing that she lived with her mom, dad, and her brother until it was revealed that her dad was having an affair.

After the news broke out, the man and his wife divorced and he went to live with and eventually marry the other woman, Kate.

Together they had two kids: 11-year-old Ellie and 9-year-old Tommy. After a year, Kate died and this is when all the problems started.

Continue reading “Guy Cheats On His Wife And Divorces Her, Expects Her To Mother His Kids From The Affair After His Second Wife’s Death”

37 Year Old Man Dies Within Hours After Marrying

37 Year Old Man Dies Within Hours After Marrying

Sorry that this guy has died – but for the purposes of my blog, this is kind of illuminating or amusing – NOT that it’s amusing that he’s dead, mind you (truly, sorry he’s passed away) –  but that it so acutely points out the problem with the “marriage will make you happier, safer, and more healthy in life” propaganda my fellow conservatives are always peddling.

Obviously, being married didn’t make this guy any happier or more secure, and it didn’t magically improve his health – he’s deceased now.

Getting married is NOT a fairy tale guarantee that it will give you a “happily ever after” ending.

I have more news stories on my blog that are similar – news reports of other people who were killed moments before, during, or after their wedding. You can see some of those similar stories at the bottom of this post, under “Related.”

(Link): Oklahoma singer-songwriter Jake Flint died in his sleep just hours after celebrating his marriage to his wife Brenda. His cause of death remains unknown.

Oklahoma singer-songwriter Jake Flint died in his sleep Sunday, just hours after celebrating his marriage to his wife Brenda.

The 37-year-old’s sudden death shook the state’s music scene with tributes pouring out to honor the fallen country singer.

His wife took to Facebook early Monday to post a video from their wedding with the caption, “I don’t understand.”

(Link): Country singer Jake Flint, 37, dies in his sleep just HOURS after his wedding

Nov 29, 2022

Oklahoma singer-songwriter Jake Flint died in his sleep hours after his wedding, leaving his new bride heartbroken.

Jake, 37, and Brenda were exchanging wedding vows at a remote homestead between Claremore and Owasso near Tulsa on Saturday night. Hours later the groom died in his sleep, The Oklahoman reported.  The cause of death has not yet been determined.

Continue reading “37 Year Old Man Dies Within Hours After Marrying”

Divorcee Learns to Enjoy Life Again After 35 Year Marriage Ends by J. Ivey

Divorcee Learns to Enjoy Life Again After 35 Year Marriage Ends by J. Ivey

I could not find a copy of this online, so I cannot link to it. I have a print copy.

Someone did upload a copy to Scribd, but you have to have a subscription or whatever to read past the first few paragraphs

Girlfriend Power

Excerpts:

February / March 2022

It was the first Valentine’s Day after my marriage ended. The last thing I wanted to do was go to a party with a bunch of single ladies

Girlfriend Power by Jennie Ivey

[The author opens the piece by explaining that she and her husband George were divorcing after 35 years of marriage.]

… For the first time in decades, I wasn’t part of a couple. For the first time in my life, I was living alone.

… Why oh why had I said I’d go to my friend Pat’s Valentine’s party? “Celebrate with other singles at a girls’ night in,” the invitation read. “Food! Music! Games! Fun!”

[Initially, she called her friend who was throwing the party to decline. The friend told her the reason for the party started years before, when her husband served her divorce papers on Valentine’s Day, and her father died on Valentine’s Day a few years prior. The friend replied,]

… “instead of moping around because we’re not coupled up, we get together to have a good time.” She wouldn’t take no for an answer.

“And one more thing, Jennie – you have to wear pink or red. It’s a Valentine’s party rule!”

[She mentions that her ex husband George was a surgeon, and while he wasn’t the greatest husband, he did okay on Valentine’s – he’d bring her flowers or candy in heart shaped boxes and so on]

Before I left for Pat’s I said a quick prayer. I hadn’t done a whole lot of praying since the breakup of my marriage. Sometimes I felt mad at God. Furious even.

Did he care that I was suddenly single at 60, an age when most couples were looking forward to retirement and spending time with their kids and grandkids together?

My prayer that evening was short and to the point: God, please show me how to be single.

Continue reading “Divorcee Learns to Enjoy Life Again After 35 Year Marriage Ends by J. Ivey”

Dear Abby: I’m Happy Now That My Abusive Ex is Dead

Dear Abby: I’m Happy Now That My Abusive Ex is Dead

 This is not the first time I’ve come across this sort of thing. I have another blog post or two from the past several years detailing letters by widowed women who say their dead husband was abusive or a big jerk, and they are thrilled the husband is dead.

(Link): Dear Abby: I’m Happy Now That My Abusive Ex is Dead

DEAR ABBY:
I have been a widow for six months.

My late husband was a physically and verbally abusive alcoholic.

I spent numerous nights in the ER waiting to be seen and nursed many black eyes throughout the years.

During all those years of abuse, which was witnessed by numerous friends and family, I remained faithful and dedicated to him and our marriage, but due to the toxicity of our relationship I was severely depressed and needed antidepressants.

I tried many times to get him help and had family interventions, only to end up being threatened with getting all my teeth knocked out.

Continue reading “Dear Abby: I’m Happy Now That My Abusive Ex is Dead”

Single by Choice: Why I Am Content to Be Without a Plus-One by M. Weldon

Single by Choice: Why I Am Content to Be Without a Plus-One by M. Weldon

(Link): Single by Choice: Why I Am Content to Be Without a Plus-One

Excerpts:

And, no, I don’t have an affliction in need of a cure.

By Michele Weldon
October 17, 2022

…Married for nine years (we were together for 12) from the mid-’80s to the mid-’90s and divorced for the past 26 years, I have been in one serious, nearly seven-year relationship since my divorce. It was a mostly calm alliance that he ended with his declaration that he never was number one in my life, and needed to be.

…Proposing a rebuttal to Three Dog Night’s 1969 cover of “One Is the Loneliest Number,” I suggest that for many women 50 and older, being single is not just a holding pattern until the next best person comes along.

In her latest book, Not Too Old for That: How Women Are Changing the Story of Aging (2022), award-winning journalist and author Vicki Larson writes, “What if being self-partnered is nothing to fear, but something actually to celebrate?”

Continue reading “Single by Choice: Why I Am Content to Be Without a Plus-One by M. Weldon”

Widow Hid Husband’s ‘Mummified Corpse’ In Home For 18 Months, Didn’t Think He Died

Widow Hid Husband’s ‘Mummified Corpse’ In Home For 18 Months, Didn’t Think He Died

(Link): Widow hid husband’s ‘mummified corpse’ in home for 18 months, didn’t think he died

by Andrew Court
Sept 26, 2022

A grieving widow kept the “mummified” corpse of her husband hidden inside her home for 18 months — and used a cleaning disinfectant to keep the flesh from rotting.

The unidentified woman, who hails from Uttar Pradesh, India, reportedly refused to believe that her spouse had passed away on April 22 last year.

According to the Indian Express, the 35-year-old victim, named Vimlesh, succumbed to “bilateral pneumonia” brought on by a COVID-19 infection.

However, his distraught wife insisted that he was only in a coma, and kept his corpse concealed in a room at their home.

Continue reading “Widow Hid Husband’s ‘Mummified Corpse’ In Home For 18 Months, Didn’t Think He Died”

Help! Can I Use My Dead Wife’s Vibrator With My New Girlfriend?

Help! Can I Use My Dead Wife’s Vibrator With My New Girlfriend?

I can’t believe I didn’t stumble across this bizarre perversion when it was first published back in 2013 (this is a re-print).

A lot of Americans spend a lot of time shaming adults over the age of 25 or so for still being virgins as being freaks or odd-balls, but the real odd-balls and freaks are people having sex who do gross, weird things like think it may be okay to pawn off their dead wife’s vibrator on their new girlfriend, I mean, WTF?

(Link): Help! Can I Use My Dead Wife’s Vibrator With My New Girlfriend?

Is This Creepy?

August 7, 2022 (originally printed in 2013)
by Slate Staff

Dear Prudence,

In the summer of 2011 my wife and I purchased a top-of-the-line Jopen vibrator. We used it a few times and were just beginning to really integrate it into our sex lives when my wife died suddenly of a heart attack. (The vibrator had nothing to do with that.)

Now, more than a year later, I’ve begun to date again. I’ve met a woman with an open mind, and I’m thinking she might be interested in using the vibrator.

But I’m not sure how, or whether, to suggest it.

Is it creepy to offer a dead woman’s vibrator to someone else?

Continue reading “Help! Can I Use My Dead Wife’s Vibrator With My New Girlfriend?”

UK Court Says Widower Can Use Late Wife’s Frozen Embryo for Surrogate

UK Court Says Widower Can Use Late Wife’s Frozen Embryo for Surrogate

(Link): Widower wins right to have baby using embryo created with his late wife

Landmark ruling allows Ted Jennings, 38, to use embryo to have child via a surrogate

(Link): Widower, 38, fights for the right to have a baby with embryo he created during IVF with wife after she died of a ruptured uterus while pregnant at the age of 40

May 5, 2022

An investment manager is fighting for the right to have a baby using the last remaining embryo he created with his late wife, after they spent a years desperately trying to have children.

Widower Ted Jennings, 38, of Highbury, north London, used his sperm to create multiple embryos with Fern-Marie Choya during several rounds of IVF treatments between 2013 and 2018.

He has now asked Mrs Justice Theis at the High Court to rule that it would be lawful for him to place the last embryo – which was created in 2018 and has been stored –  ‘in treatment with a surrogate mother’.

But lawyers representing the Human Fertilisation and Embryology Authority said Mr Jennings’ application should be dismissed.

They argued that it would not be lawful to use the embryo because Mr Jennings’ accountant wife, who died in 2019, had not provided written consent.

(Link): UK court says widower can use late wife’s frozen embryo for surrogate

Ted Jennings said his wife previously agreed upon using their embryos if she were to pass

June 23, 2022
By Haley Chi-Sing

A U.K. High Court judge ruled in favor of a man requesting to use his late wife’s frozen embryo with a surrogate on Wednesday.

Ted Jennings, 38, had submitted his application to the High Court after his wife, Fern-Marie Choya, died suddenly in 2019 while pregnant with twins and did not give written consent as to how her embryos could be used following her untimely death.

The couple had previously engaged in fertility treatments, according to The Guardian. Choya later became pregnant with twins and died suddenly 18 weeks into her pregnancy after experiencing complications.

Continue reading “UK Court Says Widower Can Use Late Wife’s Frozen Embryo for Surrogate”

Man Whose Children Were Killed by Drunk Driver Commits Suicide a Day After Father’s Day

Man Whose Children Were Killed by Drunk Driver Commits Suicide a Day After Father’s Day

I skimmed the article; it doesn’t say what drove this man’s anxiety and suicidal ideation, so I’m not sure if his kids being killed by a drunk driver is what pushed his mental health the wrong way, or if they were pre-existing conditions.

Regardless, although this guy was married with children, his children were killed, so being married and a parent was not a guarantee of constant happiness for him.

Being married, and I guess a father, didn’t bring him inner peace, joy, and all the other things so many conservatives (like Al Mohler and Brad Wilcox) say it will bring.

You can get married and have children and still be depressed or have other mental health problems, or your loved ones can still die.

Very sad story.

(Link): Man whose children were killed by drunk driver commits suicide a day after Father’s Day

by Jesse O’Neill

A Canadian dad whose three children were killed by a drunk driver in 2015 took his own life in the hours after Father’s Day.

Edward Lake’s wife Jennifer Neville-Lake shared the tragic news about her husband along with a photo of their three children — Daniel, Harry and Milly, who were 9, 5 and 2 when they died in the crash.

…A day before she shared a post with a picture of the children’s graves

Continue reading “Man Whose Children Were Killed by Drunk Driver Commits Suicide a Day After Father’s Day”

Con Artists Scammed Widow Woman Out of $800,000 by Pretending to Be Leonardo DiCaprio and Claiming He Was Enslaved by the Church of Scientology

Con Artists Scammed Widow Woman Out of $800,000 by Pretending to Be Leonardo DiCaprio and Claiming He Was Enslaved by the Church of Scientology

A few months ago, con artists were using Keanu Reeves to con women, now it’s Leonardo DiCaprio.

(Link): Con artists pretending to be Leonardo DiCaprio enslaved by Scientology scam widow out of $800K

May 12, 2022

A Texas woman says she’s lost over $800,000 to scammers attempting to extract money from her to ‘save’ actor Leonardo DiCaprio from the Church of Scientology.

The woman, 54, told The Daily Beast she was first contacted by what she thought was the Oscar-winning actor and activist via Twitter, which she was new to in around 2018.

Continue reading “Con Artists Scammed Widow Woman Out of $800,000 by Pretending to Be Leonardo DiCaprio and Claiming He Was Enslaved by the Church of Scientology”