Women In 30s Now Having More Babies Than Younger Moms in U.S.

Women In 30s Now Having More Babies Than Younger Moms in U.S. 

(Link):  American Women are Opting to Wait Longer to Have Kids

(Link): Women in Their 30s Now Having More Babies Than Younger Moms

Women in their early thirties are for the first time having more babies than younger moms in the United States, according to new data released by the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention. According to health experts, the shift was caused by more women choosing to wait longer to have children, as well as a steady national drop in teen births. Now, the birth rate for women in the 30-to-34 age group is about 103 per 100,000.

(Link):  For the First Time Ever, Thirty-Something Women Are Having More Babies Than Their Twenty-Something Counterparts

In many ways, this attitude, and the milestone marked by the new CDC data, represents a gain for women. As Rebecca Traister wrote in her 2016 book All the Single Ladies, the social permission to delay marriage and childbirth—as well the as the biological ability to do so, first through the use of reliable birth control, now with the help of the booming fertility industry—has given women the freedom to define themselves through means other than motherhood. As recently as 1970, the mean age of first birth was just 21, giving most women precious little time to pursue education, adventure, and professional achievement.

However, the rise of older parenthood is also a response to a workplace paradigm that levies penalties on mothers. The U.S. is (Link): the only wealthy nation in the world without a federal paid parental leave policy, and childcare in this country is (Link): exorbitantly expensive and (Link): frighteningly under-regulated. Together, these factors push many women to put off pregnancy in the name of professional success or financial stability.

In her 2012 book Ready: Why Women are Embracing the New Later Motherhood, University of Houston professor Elizabeth Gregory analyzed census data from 2000 and found that delaying motherhood measurably increased women’s earnings.

(Link): Women In 30s Now Having More Babies Than Younger Moms in U.S.  – May 2017

For the first time, women in their early 30s are having more babies than younger moms in the United States.

Continue reading “Women In 30s Now Having More Babies Than Younger Moms in U.S.”

58 Year Old Woman Gives Birth to Twins

58 Year Old Woman Gives Birth to Twins

(Link): 58 Year Old Woman Gives Birth to Twins

Excerpts

April 27, 2017

A 58-year-old woman who underwent fertility treatments gave birth to premature twins in northwestern Mexico last month.

The twins, a boy and a girl, were born at 33 weeks gestation and spent three weeksat Culiacan’s Regional General Hospital Number 1. They had been receiving specialized treatment for several medical conditions, including low birth weight, but are now reported to be in good condition.

They were born at 33 weeks and are in good condition, the Mexican Social Security Institute (IMSS) said in a statement.

 

Single, 54, and a New Dad: Why Some Start Families Late by A. Ellin

Single, 54, and a New Dad: Why Some Start Families Late

(Link):  Single, 54, and a New Dad: Why Some Start Families Late by A. Ellin

Excerpts:

August 5, 2016

SPARKY CAMPANELLA never heard the thrumming of a biological clock. But his “sociological clock” — his sense that he was missing out on something important in life — boomed mightily. At the age of 54, he decided to do something about it. He became a father.

He was single, but so what? “I decided I could either do it myself, or wait for the right partner to come along,” said Mr. Campanella, a Los Angeles fine arts photographer whose son, Rhys, is a little over 1 year old. Over the years he had dated women who had children of their own, but he realized that he didn’t want to be a stepdad.

….It’s a question many childless people over 50 are asking themselves. Of course, dealing with night feedings and rambunctious 2-year-olds are not for the faint of heart. But with their finances in order and their careers in place, with their life spans extended, some older people are concluding: Why not start — or continue — raising children in later life?

Continue reading “Single, 54, and a New Dad: Why Some Start Families Late by A. Ellin”

With Menopause Reversal, Women Could Be Forever Fertile

With Menopause Reversal, Women Could Be Forever Fertile

(Link): With Menopause Reversal, Women Could Be Forever Fertile

The hot flashes, night sweats, and vaginal dryness characteristic of menopause may no longer also signal the end of a woman’s fertility thanks to a blood treatment used to heal wounds.

Presenting their findings at the European Society of Human Reproduction and Embryology annual meeting in Helsinki, Finland, this month, researchers in Greece said they were able to reverse menopause in roughly 30 women, including one who entered menopause at 40 but five years later menstruated again, reports (Link): New Scientist.

Continue reading “With Menopause Reversal, Women Could Be Forever Fertile”

Mothers Over 40 in Record Baby Boom: Number of Women Who Give Birth in Their Fifth Decade or Later Trebles

Mothers Over 40 in Record Baby Boom: Number of Women Who Give Birth in Their Fifth Decade or Later Trebles

This article is from 2010. I could have sworn I already did a blog post on this, but I looked around my blog a little bit and don’t see it.

(Link): Mothers over 40 in record baby boom: Number of women who give birth in their fifth decade or later trebles

  • By Steve Doughty for the Daily Mail
  • A baby boom among older women has trebled the number giving birth after their 40th birthday.
  • Almost 27,000 babies were born to mothers over 40 last year, figures revealed yesterday.
  • The unprecedented level is nearly three times the total of 20 years ago and up by 50 per cent over the past decade.
  • Even during the post-war childbirth peak in the Sixties there were fewer children born to women in their fifth decade and beyond.
  • Britain now has one of the highest birth rates for older women in the world, with 3.8 per cent of all babies born to mothers over 40. Only Italy has a higher level in Europe.

Continue reading “Mothers Over 40 in Record Baby Boom: Number of Women Who Give Birth in Their Fifth Decade or Later Trebles”

Woman in Her 70s May Be Oldest Ever to Give Birth

Woman in Her 70s May Be Oldest Ever to Give Birth

(Link): Woman in Her 70s May Be Oldest Ever to Give Birth

Excerpts:

  • By ARSHAD R. ZARGAR & ASHLEY WELCH CBS NEWS
  • May 12, 2016, 3:23 PM
  • A woman in India could make the record books as one of the oldest ever to give birth.
  • Daljinder Kaur, who’s believed to be at least 70 years old, gave birth to a son named Arman (meaning “wish” in Hindi) on April 19. The baby was the first for Kaur and her 79-year-old husband, Mohinder Singh Gill, after nearly five decades of marriage.
  • “I feel blessed to be able to hold my own baby. I had lost hope of becoming a mother ever,” said Kaur, who underwent two years of (Link): IVF treatment and had two failed attempts earlier.

Continue reading “Woman in Her 70s May Be Oldest Ever to Give Birth”

Follow Up Part 2 – Reactions by Other Writers to Sexist, Condescending 50 Something Men Who Think They Are Final Arbiters of If Women Are Attractive Past Age of 40 (Re: Esquire Editorial by Junod)

Follow Up Part 2 – Reactions by Other Writers to Sexist, Condescending 50 Something Men Who Think They Are Final Arbiters of If Women Are Attractive Past Age of 40 (Re: Esquire Editorial by Junod)

Original Post:

Follow Up 1:

More backlash:

Note: as to this link below, at the LA Times, the section on the page entitled “It misleads women into thinking they have time” was actually quite sexist. I have chosen to not paste that part of the page in.

That part was written by a Charlotte Allen who argues that all men will always favor 22 year old women over 42 year old women, mostly because most men want to have babies.

I don’t know what rock that woman writer is living under, but women in their 40s still get their periods every month and conceive ((Link): read this page for starters – that is one but several pages I have on this blog noting that lots and lots more women are getting pregnant, some for the first time, over age 40).

I personally never really cared if I had a baby or not, but I think it’s sexist to say that women over 40 are basically unvaluable (to men) because, in the writer’s opinion, they’re all barren (they are not, by the way. A lot of “oops” pregnancies happen to women over 40, because they go off birth control under the mistaken notion “I can no longer get pregnant, or not easily.”)

(Link): What’s so offensive about Esquire’s praise of 42-year-old women?

Excerpts:

    By ALEXANDRA LE TELLIER

    Women don’t need a writer dressed in feminist clothing to define her worth by his own narrow definitions

    Tom Junod set the social web aflame with his article praising 42-year-old women. Never did one think that Esquire, a men’s magazine that’s stayed above the lad mag fray, could enrage so many people. But that it did, with people accusing Junod of sexism.

    “Let’s face it: There used to be something tragic about even the most beautiful forty-two-year-old woman,” Junod begins. Now, he writes, “it may be said that the best thing that forty-two-year-old American men have going for them is forty-two-year-old American women.”

    It might sound like a compliment, but women aren’t buying it.

    … I asked some of our female writers for their thoughts, and here’s what they had to say.

    Where has Junod been?

    … And, men, you now have Esquire’s permission to objectify women in their 40s without being creepy to other men. (But, again, only if the women do Pilates and yoga.) This expands your potential ogling to hundreds, even thousands more women each year.

    Kidding aside, I find the whole premise of the piece to be completely outdated, if it was ever true to begin with. It’s as though Esquire and Junod have been cryogenically frozen for the last 20 to 30 years and woke up to discover this new creature in mass media called the Modern Woman. She’s independent! She’s empowered! She’s still sexy at 40!

    But my biggest complaint is that Junod and Esquire reinforce the sexualization of women in general — the idea that the value of a woman is how much she arouses a man.

    Continue reading “Follow Up Part 2 – Reactions by Other Writers to Sexist, Condescending 50 Something Men Who Think They Are Final Arbiters of If Women Are Attractive Past Age of 40 (Re: Esquire Editorial by Junod)”

Looking For Free Sperm, Women May Turn To Online Forums

Looking For Free Sperm, Women May Turn To Online Forums

Thank Dog I never cared one way or another if I ever had a baby or not. I just never hankered for one.

I could not imagine being so desperate to have a kid that you’d go to a site to hook up with a stranger to pork each other and have a kid. No thanks, I’d rather die alone, single, childless, celibate.

(Link): Looking For Free Sperm, Women May Turn To Online Forums

    Commercial sperm banks have operated in the U.S. since the early 1970s. Today, women who can afford to use them tend do so without stigma. But banks are no longer the only source for women hoping to get pregnant.

    There are informal, unregulated websites popping up where men who are willing to donate their sperm for free can meet women who are hoping to have a baby.

    The most established sperm donation website in the U.S., the Known Donor Registry, launched in 2010. Since then, it has grown to more than 16,000 members.

    Membership to this site and others does not necessarily reflect how many people actually conceive this way — in fact, there really aren’t solid statistics on this kind of exchange. But there are anecdotes, and people have come forward saying they’ve tried it.

    Continue reading “Looking For Free Sperm, Women May Turn To Online Forums”

The Crumbling Post-35 Pregnancy Myth (article from The Daily Beast site)

The Crumbling Post-35 Pregnancy Myth

(Link) The Crumbling Post-35 Pregnancy Myth

Excerpts:

    The prevailing myth that women can’t and shouldn’t get pregnant after the age of 35 is finally starting to crumble. Science shows women can safely deliver healthy babies into their 40s.
    ———

A new study finds that women who had their last child when they were 33 or older lived longer than those who had their last child by 29. It doesn’t necessarily mean one causes the other—it’s possible that being healthy enough to get pregnant later also causes longevity—but it’s encouraging news for those of us who waited until our late 30s to have children.

  • That news has been coming more quickly in recent years. As I noted in my book The Impatient Woman’s Guide to Getting Pregnant, the scary statistic that one out of three women over 35 will not be pregnant after a year of trying comes from an analysis of French birth records between 1670 and 1830.
  • Studies of more modern populations find fairly high fertility in a woman’s late 30s.
  • About 80 percent of women 35-39 will get pregnant naturally in a year of trying. That’s barely different from the 85 percent of under 35’s who will succeed.
  • Other recent good news for older women and fertility comes from an unlikely source: statistics from in vitro fertilization (IVF) clinics. Until just a few years ago, IVF success rates for older women were depressingly low.

Continue reading “The Crumbling Post-35 Pregnancy Myth (article from The Daily Beast site)”

More Criticisms of the Pope’s Anti Childless Anti Childfree Comments

More Criticisms of the Pope’s Anti Childless Anti Childfree Comments

The Pope recently said that people who do not have children will end up “bitter” and “lonely,” among other anti-childless, anti-childfree comments. Here are some editorials criticizing his views.

(Link): Why Parents Can Still End Up Lonely

    Hey, Pope Francis: Being child-free doesn’t make you bitter, and having kids certainly isn’t proof against ending up alone. Amanda Marcotte (Link): has already done a fabulous job outlining why Pope Francis was wrong to dismiss those of us living the child-free life as shallow, future bitter types.

    But besides misjudging those who consciously choose not to have children when they are not financially or emotionally ready to be good parents as selfish, the pope’s argument has another flaw: the idea that having children is a surefire way to avoid loneliness later in life.

(Link): Hey, Pope Francis: Kids Aren’t a Retirement Plan

    ADULTS WHO HAVE KIDS CAN STILL BE PLENTY LONELY, WRITES KELI GOFF

    By Kevin Spak, Newser Staff
    Posted Jun 9, 2014 11:57 AM CDT

    (NEWSER) – Pope Francis recently exhorted his followers to have kids, saying that to do otherwise would lead to “old age in solitude, with the bitterness of loneliness.”

    Well Keli Goff at the Daily Beast has some news for the pontiff: “Children are not a surefire way to inoculate against loneliness.”

    Adult children constantly abandon their elders to nursing homes, for one. “One director of a local nursing home said 85% of his residents had no visitors,” the head of a volunteer organization called Visiting the Lonely Ones tells Goff.

    Loneliness can set in before nursing home age, too— “I know of divorced people who struggled during holiday seasons” as custody arrangements kept their kids away, Goff writes.

    Ultimately, your happiness is your own responsibility, and there are no guarantees. “I think it is selfish to have a child only to have a caregiver later in life,” one family therapist says. “I think that is quite narcissistic to do something like this.” Click for Goff’s full column.

(Link): Conservative and Childfree

    Does being a conservative mean I must have children?
    By A. J. Delgado

    Daily Beast columnist Amanda Marcotte is getting rough treatment from conservatives over her Friday piece “Pope Francis Is Wrong About My Child-Free Life,” which makes a persuasive case that it’s OK to not have kids.

    Full disclosure: I am in that child-free camp. (I call it “child-free” while some pro-parentage folks may prefer the term “child-less” — one’s choice of term likely gives away one’s view on the matter.)

    Like Marcotte, I’m a woman in my 30s (34 to be exact) with, at the present time and likely into the future, no interest in being a mother.

    Motherhood seems wonderful for others, and I respect and cherish the role, though I have sensibly decided it simply isn’t for me. I’ll pass on parenting.

    But I am also a conservative. Can those two be reconciled? Does being a conservative mean I must have children or, at the very least, like Pontifex, encourage others to do so?

    It’s a question that has been lingering for quite some time. After all, conservatism is family-friendly and socially traditional, stressing family as the core building block of society. But as more and more men and women nowadays rule out the idea of having children, are these individuals any less conservative than those who are parents?

    Continue reading “More Criticisms of the Pope’s Anti Childless Anti Childfree Comments”

Women are having fewer kids, and demographers don’t know why

Women are having fewer kids, and demographers don’t know why

(Link): Women are having fewer kids, and demographers don’t know why

    BY JOSEPH LAWLER | JUNE 7, 2014 | 6:00 AM

    U.S. fertility is not recovering from the financial crisis — and demographers aren’t sure why.

    The fertility rate fell to a record low 62.9 births per 1,000 women aged 15-44 in 2013, according to the National Center for Health Statistics.

    The total number of births, at 3.96 million, inched up by a mere 4,000 from 2012, the first increase since the financial crisis. But the total fertility rate, or TFR, the average number of children a woman would have during her child-bearing years, fell to just 1.86, the lowest rate in 27 years. TFR is considered the best metric of fertility. A TFR of 2.1 represents a stable population, with children replacing parents as they die off.

    Demographers expected the fertility rate to fall during recession, as financially strapped families put off childbearing. But what has surprised some demographers is both the depth of the decline and the fact that fertility has continued to drop even over the course of the country’s five years of slow but steady recovery. The rate has fallen steadily each year since 2007, when it stood at 2.1 percent.

    Continue reading “Women are having fewer kids, and demographers don’t know why”

Duggar Family Visits Fertility Specialist To Have Another Baby

Duggar Family Visits Fertility Specialist To Have Another Baby

The mind boggles. I do believe this is nuclear family and baby worship taken to an insane degree.

The Duggars, if I remember correctly, are part of the “Quiverfull” movement. They already have 19, or 20 kids.

(Link): Duggars visit fertility doctor to explore having 20th kid

(Link): ‘Am I ready to catch another baby?’ Mother-of-19 Michelle Duggar visits ‘high-risk’ fertility doctor in hopes of having MORE children aged 47

    Her chances of conceiving are less than five per cent and her odds of having a child with down syndrome are ‘one in four or five’

    This marks the longest time in 27 years that Mrs Duggar has not been pregnant

    The strictly Christian family does not believe in birth control
    By ANNABEL FENWICK ELLIOTT

    PUBLISHED: 10:34 EST, 20 May 2014 | UPDATED: 12:07 EST, 20 May 2014

    Michelle and Jim Bob Duggar, parents to 19 children already, have visited a fertility doctor in a bid to see whether they are ‘ready’ for another baby.

    ‘We would love more children if God saw fit to give us more, I just want to make sure that I am ready to catch a baby if that would happen’, explains Mrs Duggar, 47, star of 19 Kids and Counting, in a clip on Today.com from tonight’s episode of the TLC show.

    ‘My goal is to find out where I am in my life, hormonally speaking,’ she says of visiting Dr Paul Wendel, an OB-GYN specializing in high-risk pregnancies.

    Michelle and Jim Bob Duggar, parents to 19 children already, have visited a fertility doctor in a bid to see whether they are ‘ready’ for another baby.

    ‘We would love more children if God saw fit to give us more, I just want to make sure that I am ready to catch a baby if that would happen’, explains Mrs Duggar, 47, star of 19 Kids and Counting, in a clip on Today.com from tonight’s episode of the TLC show.

    ‘My goal is to find out where I am in my life, hormonally speaking,’ she says of visiting Dr Paul Wendel, an OB-GYN specializing in high-risk pregnancies.

    Michelle and Jim Bob Duggar, parents to 19 children already, have visited a fertility doctor in a bid to see whether they are ‘ready’ for another baby.

    ‘We would love more children if God saw fit to give us more, I just want to make sure that I am ready to catch a baby if that would happen’, explains Mrs Duggar, 47, star of 19 Kids and Counting, in a clip on Today.com from tonight’s episode of the TLC show.

    ‘My goal is to find out where I am in my life, hormonally speaking,’ she says of visiting Dr Paul Wendel, an OB-GYN specializing in high-risk pregnancies.

—————–
Related posts:

(Link): Population Decline and Bay-bee Obsession – Patriarchy, Quiverfull, Traditional Family, Christian Gender Complementarian Nuts

(Link): Otherhood – An overlooked demographic – the Childless and Childfree Women and Singles Especially Women Who Had Hoped to Marry and Have Kids But Never Met Mr. Right (links)

(Link): Parenthood Does Not Make People More Loving Mature Godly Ethical Caring or Responsible (One Stop Thread)

(Link): Loving the child-free people in your church by S. Burden

(Link): Study: Couples Without Children Have Happier Marriages / Study: Having Kids Ruins Your Life

(Link): Widows and Childless and Childfree Have Better Well Being Than Married Couples and Parents says new study

(Link): Cultural Discrimination Against Childless and Childfree Women – and link to an editorial by a Childless Woman

(Link): Study: Couples Without Children Have Happier Marriages / Study: Having Kids Ruins Your Life

(Link): Christian Patriarchy Group: God Demands You Marry and Have Babies to Defeat Paganism and Satan. Singles and the Childless Worthless (in this worldview).

(Link): Lies The Church Tells Single Women (by Sue Bohlin)

(Link): The Isolating Power of Family-Centered Language (How churches exclude singles and the childless) by E A Dause

(Link): Never Married Christians Over Age 35 who are childless Are More Ignored Than Divorced or Infertile People or Single Parents

(Link): If the Family Is Central, Christ Isn’t

(Link): Misapplication of Biblical Verses About Fertility (also mentions early marriage) – a paper by J. McKeown

(Link): Christian Patriarchy Group: God Demands You Marry and Have Babies to Defeat Paganism and Satan. Singles and the Childless Worthless (in this worldview).

(Link): Married Preacher, Father of Eight Kids (and promoter of “Family Values” and Leader of wacko Quiverfull- and- Patriarchy type groups that promotes idolatry of “the family” and Marriage and of Having Lots of Children), Used Nanny as Sex Object – update on Phillips story

(Link): The Irrelevancy To Single or Childless or Childfree Christian Women of Biblical Gender Complementarian Roles / Biblical Womanhood Teachings

Otherhood – An overlooked demographic – the Childless and Childfree Women and Singles Especially Women Who Had Hoped to Marry and Have Kids But Never Met Mr. Right (links)

Otherhood – An overlooked demographic – the Childless and Childfree Women and Singles (links)
——————————————
The book Otherhood: Modern Women Finding A New Kind of Happiness by Melanie Notkin is available for sale on Barnes and Noble, and other sites.

From a page about the book:

    More American women are childless than ever before—nearly half those of childbearing age don’t have children.

While our society often assumes these women are “childfree by choice,” that’s not always true.

In reality, many of them expected to marry and have children, but it simply hasn’t happened. Wrongly judged as picky or career-obsessed, they make up the “Otherhood,” a growing demographic that has gone without definition or visibility until now.

—————————————-
Disclaimer: I am not anti-motherhood, nor necessarily against people taking their mothers out to brunch on Mother’s Day.

I am, however, against the onslaught of syrupy Mother’s Day hoopla on and before the day, and the church services that honor mothers because:

  • Some people (women included) were abused by their mothers and so find the holiday awkward or painful,
  • some people had or have mothers who are/were cruel or overly-critical,
  • some people’s mothers are dead and they miss them terribly,
  • some women desire to be a mother but cannot because they are infertile, their spouse is infertile, or they are single and cannot find “Mr. Right” (and don’t believe in getting pregnant outside of marriage, or don’t feel they could support a baby alone)
  • some women choose to be child free, but feel excluded or shamed by church and secular staggering emphasis on motherhood on the holiday

Some Christians have turned motherhood (as well as fatherhood and marriage) into idols, which they should repent of.
—————————-
This post discusses “Otherhood” (women who delay motherhood for years, or who are infertile, or ones who were open to having children but who’ve not met “Mr Right,” and for whatever reason, do not want to have a child while single, but would prefer to be married before having kids)

OTHERHOOD

(Link): The Otherhood: Single women face ‘circumstantial infertility’

Excerpt

    Melanie Notkin wanted love, marriage, and then the proverbial baby carriage — in that order.

By the time she reached her early forties, the entrepreneur and author was still single and appreciated the likelihood that, despite wanting desperately to be a mother, she might never give birth to a child on her own.

Like many women her age, Notkin, 44, a Montreal native, expected to reap all the social, economic, and political equality that her mother’s generation didn’t have. At the same time, in addition to her education and her career, she anticipated a traditional family track.

In her new book, released today, “Otherhood: Modern Women Finding A New Kind of Happiness,” Notkin uncovers the personal stories of women like her, who are part of a growing demographic trend and suffer what she calls “circumstantial infertility.”

Often, people presume that when a woman like Notkin is childless, it’s probably by choice. But many of the childless women in their thirties and forties simply want to do it the “old fashioned way,” she says, and find the right relationship before making a lifetime commitment to have kids.

Continue reading “Otherhood – An overlooked demographic – the Childless and Childfree Women and Singles Especially Women Who Had Hoped to Marry and Have Kids But Never Met Mr. Right (links)”

Three Parents? FDA Mulls Safety of Embryo Technique

Three Parents? FDA Mulls Safety of Embryo Technique

(Link): Experts: Confirming safety of 3-person embryo technique could take decades

    WASHINGTON — Genetic experts cautioned the federal government Tuesday that it could take decades to confirm the safety of an experimental fertilization technique that would create babies from the DNA of three people, with the aim of preventing children from inheriting some debilitating diseases.

    The Food and Drug Administration heard from supporters and opponents of the provocative technique at a two-day meeting, as the agency considers whether to greenlight testing in women who have defective genes linked to blindness, organ failure and many other inheritable diseases.

    Preliminary testing in animals suggests that combining the DNA of two parents with that of a third female donor could allow prospective mothers to give birth to healthy children. But even experts in the field warned that researchers would have to follow the offspring for many years to see if they are truly healthy.

(Link): Genetically Modified Babies (op ed)

(Link): FDA Considers 3-Person Embryo Fertilization

    Procedure could prevent children from inheriting genetic diseases from mothers

(Link): FDA Weighs Unknowns of 3-Person Embryo Technique

Continue reading “Three Parents? FDA Mulls Safety of Embryo Technique”

Is The Church Failing Childless Women? by Diane Paddison

Is The Church Failing Childless Women? by Diane Paddison

(Link): Is The Church Failing Childless Women?

    Does the church know how to love childless women? It’s a difficult but important question.

I recently read a pair of articles from two different perspectives that touch on this issue.

One was (Link): from Suzanne Burden, a married woman in her early 40s who has struggled with infertility; the other was (Link): from Amanda Bast, an unmarried 26­-year-­old. Both presented quite a poignant picture of how lonely—even alienating—the “Christian community” can feel when you don’t fit the traditional, get-married-young-and-start-a-family-early” mold.

… These articles were eye­opening and convicting to me. I have to admit that at times I have been guilty of some of the exact things that Suzanne and Amanda described [eg, ignoring or mistreating childless women].

And I should know better.

Even though I do have kids, as a full­time professional I certainly know what it feels like to not fit into the traditional image of the Christian mom.

..But really, we should all know better.

Continue reading “Is The Church Failing Childless Women? by Diane Paddison”

Over 40 Woman Gives Birth to Actor Owen Wilson’s Baby

Over 40 Woman Gives Birth to Actor Owen Wilson’s Baby

(Link): Welcomes Baby Boy With Fitness Trainer Caroline Lindqvist

    CELEBRITY MOMS JANUARY 31, 2014 AT 8:00PM BY ESTHER LEE

Boy, oh baby! Owen Wilson welcomed his second son, a baby boy, into the world with personal trainer Caroline Lindqvist on Thursday, Jan. 30, his rep confirms to Us Weekly.

This is Wilson’s first child with Lindqvist. Back in October, Us confirmed that the actor, 44, and Lindqvist, 41, were expecting a child together. The parents, who reportedly first met when the actor hired her to be his trainer several years ago, are no longer together.

A source close to the situation told Us that the Wedding Crashers star made it clear to Lindqvist (who was in the process of divorcing her plastic surgeon husband) that he would be there for her, as well as the child once he arrived: “Owen plans to be involved with the baby and help raise him,” the insider told Us.


Related Posts:

(Link):  Mothers Over 40 in Record Baby Boom: Number of Women Who Give Birth in Their Fifth Decade or Later Trebles

(Link): Infertility/ Kids/ The Male Biological Clock

(Link): Rock Singer Gwen Stefani Pregnant at Age 43

(Link): The Decline in Male Fertility (article)

(Link):  Woman in Her 70s May Be Oldest Ever to Give Birth 

(Link): Actress Pregnant With Second Baby At Age 41 (or 42)

(Link): Ladies Over 35 Years Of Age Having Babies

(Link): Ageism and Singlehood: Ask Amy Columnist

(Link): Infertility/ Kids/ The Male Biological Clock

 

Fewer women seek help for infertility, data show

Fewer women seek help for infertility, data show

I didn’t care too much if I had children or not, but I blog about this topic on occasion because if you are a Christian female, you get the message from Christian culture constantly that you are not worth anything unless you marry and have children.

Some lunatic Christians, even the ones more mainstream, and despite the total lack of biblical support (sorry, but the Bible comparing kids to a ‘quiverfull of arrows’ is really not suggesting that believers should breed like rabbits for theological, or socio-political-cultural, reasons) are teaching that to win ‘Murica back to Christ, that Christian couples need to pop out oodles of rug rats, out breed the heathen.

That is why I occasionally post infertility articles, unwed mother birth rate articles, etc. etc.

(Link): Fewer women seek help for infertility, data show

    7:47 AM, January 22, 2014

    Increased awareness about the options hasn’t resulted in increased use of infertility services, according to new federal data. Instead, the numbers show declines for those seeking medical help to get pregnant or to prevent miscarriage.

    “There’s always been this perception these things are on the rise when the data have never supported that,” says Anjani Chandra, lead author of the report, out Wednesday from the National Center for Health Statistics.

    Findings are based on a survey of 22,682 men and women, ages 15-44, conducted from 2006 to 2010, but much of the focus is on ages 25-44, because that’s when the report says “infertility service use may be more prevalent.”

    … Kurt Barnhart, president of the Society for Reproductive Endocrinology and Infertility, says the report confirms what he already knows.

    “Fertility services are underutilized and not reaching everybody,” says Barnhart, an OB-GYN at the University of Pennsylvania in Philadelphia.

    Still, findings show that women ages 25-44 with current fertility problems were “five times more likely to have ever used any infertility services and six times more likely to have used medical help to get pregnant” than those without current problems.

    … Still, high costs for some procedures (that can reach thousands of dollars) as well as the fact that not all procedures are covered by insurance means that some may not take that first step, Barnhart says.

    “Not everyone needs expensive or high-tech treatment,” he says. “Maybe simple treatments and advice is all they need. When people don’t come in to get the consult, they don’t know if simple solutions would have helped them.”

    Barnhart suggests one reason for the declines could be that the survey was conducted largely during tough economic times.

—————
Related posts:

(Link): Response to the Hemingway Editorial ‘Fecundophobia’ – conservatives and Christians continue to idolize children, marriage – which is unbiblical

(Link): Misapplication of Biblical Verses About Fertility (also mentions early marriage) – a paper by J. McKeown

(Link): Christian Patriarchy Group: God Demands You Marry and Have Babies to Defeat Paganism and Satan. Singles and the Childless Worthless (in this worldview).

(Link): Conservatives and Christians Fretting About U.S. Population Decline – We Must “Out-breed” Opponents Christian Host Says

Don’t Judge Me, I’m Childless (from Today’s Christian Woman)

Don’t Judge Me, I’m Childless (from Today’s Christian Woman)

You have to be a member and logged on to read the entire editorial. Or, you might be able to read the entire thing by clicking (Link): here.

Some women DO make a choice NOT to become mothers. They are called “child free,” and they should not be marginalized in or by churches, either, not just the women who wanted children but for whatever reason could not have any.

(Link): Don’t Judge Me, I’m Childless

Their editorial preview:

    Is there a place at church for those of us who don’t have kids?
    by Jean E. Jones

    Recently, a woman asked, “My husband and I are childless. How do you cope with the feelings of rejection and of being a minority in the church community?” Both she and I are unable to have children, and her question brought back memories: the hurt as friends with babies bundled in blankets pulled away, the struggle to fit in at church, and the hurdles of gracefully handling ignorant and hurtful comments.

    Childlessness is a growing church issue: The number of women who will never bear children has doubled in the last 30 years from 1 in 10 to almost 1 in 5 (Pew Research).

    In 1976, the number of childless women ages 40–44 (considered the end of childbearing years) was 580,000; by 2008, it had more than tripled to 1.9 million.

    What’s causing this rise in childlessness?

    First, Americans are delaying marriage until they’ve achieved educational goals and financial stability. The median age for women’s first marriage is now 27, and more than half of women age 25 to 29 have never married, says the 2013 report Knot Yet: The Benefits and Costs of Delayed Marriage in America.

    Delaying marriage leaves fewer childbearing years in which to find a suitable husband. It also decreases a woman’s chance of having a successful pregnancy.

    But the bigger reason is that more women are choosing not to have children: Among women ages 40–44, the number of voluntarily childless now equals the number who wanted children but couldn’t have them.

    In TIME Magazine’s recent cover article “None Is Enough,” Lauren Sandler cites many reasons for the surge in opting to be child-free. Some non-moms say they don’t want the “bone-tired” lifestyle their mothers had “doing it all,” or never felt they were “mother material.”

    The financial costs in raising a child are formidable, and leaving the career track for a mommy track can cost “$1 million in lost salary, lost promotions and so on.”

    Women who delay marriage may develop enjoyable lifestyles they’re reluctant to give up. Society’s portrayal of all it takes to be a great mom seems unrealistic.

    Whether being without offspring is voluntary or not, the biggest stress the childless face is isolation as “friends just peel off into their small domestic worlds,” Lauren says.

    The late 30s and early 40s are the loneliest because friends are parents, but not empty nesters.

    Another strain is being judged harshly. Others assume lack of progeny is by choice, and that that choice is selfish. In the 2008 movie The Women, Sylvie (Annette Bening) says to Mary (Meg Ryan): “Do you know that’s the last impermissible thing you can say at a dinner party? That you don’t want children?”

    The childless feel scolded in a culture that mandates motherhood, says TIME.

    Unintentionally illustrating the point, Fox & Friends host Tucker Carlson responded to TIME with, “But having children means less time for vacations and spin class, where the real meaning in life resides, right? I mean, have you ever seen anything more selfish, decadent and stupid?”

    Problems don’t stop at the church door. Lauren Sandler says that for some, the church community seems so “oppressively family-centric,” they abandon it.

    At church as elsewhere, moms naturally seek out other moms as they look for friends not just for themselves, but for their children. Church groups for couples, singles, and women in their 30s and 40s consist almost entirely of parents who gravitate to each other to chat about potty training, children’s soccer, and teenage angst. The childless feel sidelined.

    Criticisms take a spiritual edge with some arguing that procreation is God’s command, not just his blessing. Too many pronounce infertility a sign of divine disfavor, leaving women reticent to admit their situation. Controversies over the morality of fertility options make discussions seem like minefields. The result: Church feels unsafe.

    But all this can be changed. Here are ways those with children can help those without feel included in the church community instead of isolated, and accepted instead of criticized.

    Create opportunities for diverse friendships.

    Rather than getting together with just moms your age, reach out to the childless woman. Invite her to coffee and share about your lives. Plan get-togethers that women in different life stages can enjoy and that will naturally engender conversations about more than just children: For instance, tea in an antique district gives lots to talk about. Make sure the conversation includes everyone.

    Continue reading “Don’t Judge Me, I’m Childless (from Today’s Christian Woman)”

More married women are not having children, U.S. study finds – this will throw a monkey wrench into conservative Christian plans

More married women are not having children, U.S. study finds

If you mosey through older posts on this blog, you will notice that some conservative Christians, all the way to totally nutty Reconstructionist / Dominionist / Quivering Christian groups, think that the way to win America back to God and/or to bring purity and decency back to American culture, to fight the population decline and so on, is to encourage Christian teen agers to marry young.

Hmm, well, it looks like getting married is not a guarantee of popping out children either.

Getting married and having children is no longer the norm, so Christians need to knock it off with the “Gift of Singleness, only a few are called to singleness, God expects most to marry” horse shit. Whether to marry or stay single is a cultural thing, a personal decision thing, not a “Thus saith the Lord” thing.

(Link): More married women are not having children, U.S. study finds

    Among married American women, having no children is still rare, but it has become less so as ideas about why to marry have changed.

    By Emily Alpert Reyes
    December 7, 2013, 10:21 p.m.

    First came love. Then came marriage.

    And the baby carriage? Meh.

    “Just the two of us is awesome,” said Sara Tenenbein, a 31-year-old blogger and consultant living with her husband in Los Angeles. “Maybe we don’t need to add more humans to the equation.”

    Not having children is still rare among married women like Tenenbein, but less so than it used to be, according to an analysis by the National Center for Family & Marriage Research at Bowling Green State University, which examined figures from the National Survey of Family Growth.

    The percentage of married women ages 40 to 44 who had no biological children and no other kids in the household, such as adopted children or stepkids, reached 6% in the period from 2006 to 2010. That’s a small but statistically significant jump since 1988, when only 4.5% of married women had no kids.

    Continue reading “More married women are not having children, U.S. study finds – this will throw a monkey wrench into conservative Christian plans”

One in 25 babies born to over-40s / 53 year old woman gives birth to baby

One in 25 babies born to over-40s / 53 year old woman gives birth to baby

(Link): My 53-year-old mother has had a baby, and it’s changed me

    byNadia Gilani
    theguardian.com, Thursday 17 October 2013
    When my mother became pregnant I dreaded the baby’s arrival, but the love I feel for my brother has flicked my maternal switch

(Link): One in 25 babies born to over-40s

    Number of women over 40 having a baby has risen fourfold in 30 years, and average age of first-time mother now 28.1

    Denis Campbell, health correspondent
    The Guardian, Tuesday 15 October 2013 18.30 EDT

    The number of women over the age of 40 having a baby has increased more than fourfold in the last 30 years, figures show.

    At the same time the number of women over 35 giving birth has risen almost as sharply, underlying the pronounced shift towards older motherhood.

    Continue reading “One in 25 babies born to over-40s / 53 year old woman gives birth to baby”