The Silent Shame of Male Infertility by M. Oaklander

The Silent Shame of Male Infertility by M. Oaklander

(Link): The Silent Shame of Male Infertility

Excerpts

By MANDY OAKLANDER
January 3, 2019

…He started taking fertility drugs to help his testicles recover. But three months later, he still had no sperm. He’d been injecting himself with testosterone because his body could no longer produce it naturally, but his doctor recommended he stop in order to make the fertility drugs more effective.

Now his sperm count is slowly climbing, but his sex drive has withered, along with his energy and 30 pounds of muscle. He has fat in places he never had before, including his breast tissue. He’s become depressed.

 On his social-media accounts, Goldman has scaled back on shirtless photos and posts more long-sleeved shots instead. But beyond confiding in his wife, he hasn’t publicly shared what’s really going on. “I have 10-plus thousand people that follow me on Instagram,” he says, “who don’t know who the f-ck I am.”

Infertility is almost always thought of as a woman’s issue, and it’s true that women bear the greater burden of it. They are the ones who ultimately either get pregnant or don’t, and regardless of which partner has the fertility problem, the woman’s body is usually the site of treatment.

Continue reading “The Silent Shame of Male Infertility by M. Oaklander”

Why I Have Zero Regrets About My Childless Life by C. Zacharek

Why I Have Zero Regrets About My Childless Life by C. Zacharek

(Link): Why I Have Zero Regrets About My Childless Life

Excerpts:

I’d always wanted babies. Probably. Eventually. Possibly. When I graduated from college, in the early 1980s, friends started having them while I remained happily unencumbered.

Even after I married, family planning was more like having no plan, other than putting it off until later. When I reached the age when I was supposed to be desperate to be a mother–early to mid-30s–I didn’t feel desperate; I only felt unsure.

My sole mistake at the time, I see now, was not trusting that I’d be O.K.–maybe even better than O.K.–with or without a baby.

Today, more and more women are choosing not to have children, and while the stigma hasn’t completely lifted, it’s not what it once was.

Continue reading “Why I Have Zero Regrets About My Childless Life by C. Zacharek”

First Baby Born Using Uterus Transplanted From Deceased Donor

First Baby Born Using Uterus Transplanted From Deceased Donor

(Link): First Baby Born Using Uterus Transplanted From Deceased Donor

Excerpts

by Maria Cheng
December 2018

– Brazilian doctors are reporting the world’s first baby born to a woman with a uterus transplanted from a deceased donor.

Eleven previous births have used a transplanted womb but from a living donor, usually a relative or friend.

Experts said using uteruses from women who have died could make more transplants possible. Ten previous attempts using deceased donors in the Czech Republic, Turkey and the U.S. have failed.

Continue reading “First Baby Born Using Uterus Transplanted From Deceased Donor”

The Overlooked Emotions of Sperm Donation

(Link): The Overlooked Emotions of Sperm Donation

by Ashley Fetters

July 9, 2018

“My hope is that people think about how this is more than a transaction,” says one family therapist.

Sperm donation offers a tidy solution to an aggravating problem: When a person or a couple wants a baby and needs a different ingredient than what they’ve currently got to make one, a man with viable sperm swoops in to help.

…As simple a transaction as sperm donation can seem to be, though, some find it to be stressful or isolating—and because assisted reproductive technology is a relatively new, rapidly developing field, the social and emotional challenges that can arise between the participants in a sperm donation are, for many, uncharted.

Continue reading “The Overlooked Emotions of Sperm Donation”

Why More Women Are Having Babies at 50 and Beyond

Why More Women Are Having Babies at 50 and Beyond

(Link):  Why More Women Are Having Babies at 50 and Beyond

Excerpts:

….Duckworth [Sen. Tammy Duckworth, D-Ill] is expected to deliver her second child a few weeks after she turns 50, a time when many woman expect the end of fertility and the beginning of menopause to be around the corner.

The Senator said she delayed having children to pursue her career and, by the time she was ready, she had to overcome infertility.”The early part of my career, which was also, [like] for most women, your twenties and early thirties, your prime fertility years,” she told ABC station WLS in Chicago, “were also my career-building years.”

She is not alone. Duckworth is among a growing number of women, including celebrities like Janet Jackson and Sophie B. Hawkins, tackling motherhood in their fifties.

Overall birthrates in the United States have been declining for years, reaching a record low in 2016, according to National Bureau of Health Statistics, and provisional data suggests a new low for 2017.

Continue reading “Why More Women Are Having Babies at 50 and Beyond”

Womb Transplants Could Allow Men to Have Babies ‘Tomorrow’, Claims Expert

Womb Transplants Could Allow Men to Have Babies ‘Tomorrow’, Claims Expert

I wonder, do men get the annoying monthly menstrual period to go along with it, which can come with cramps and backaches? *fingers crossed*

What a strange world we’re living in.

(Link): Womb Transplants Could Allow Men to Have Babies ‘Tomorrow’, Claims Expert

by V Fletcher, November 2017

Blokes would not be able to deliver the baby naturally, but could give birth by cesarean

Continue reading “Womb Transplants Could Allow Men to Have Babies ‘Tomorrow’, Claims Expert”

Raising Concerns About a Widely Used Test to Measure Fertility by C. Caron

Raising Concerns About a Widely Used Test to Measure Fertility by C. Caron

(Link): Raising Concerns About a Widely Used Test to Measure Fertility by C. Caron

Excerpts

Oct 16, 2017

[She was told her eggs were too old or not good enough, so she’d likely not be able to have a kid and the fertility treatment was very expensive and not covered by her insurance]

…Two years later, she remarried. Ms. Bourquin and her husband conceived naturally on the first try. Her doctor was “stunned,” Ms. Bourquin said.

…New research published last week in the Journal of the American Medical Association underscores what Ms. Bourquin experienced, and what many fertility experts have already observed: AMH doesn’t dictate a woman’s reproductive potential.

And although AMH testing is one of the most common ways that doctors assess a woman’s fertility — it’s especially important for women struggling with infertility — an AMH value isn’t always telling.

Continue reading “Raising Concerns About a Widely Used Test to Measure Fertility by C. Caron”

WHO: Single People Who Struggle to Find A Partner To Be Considered “Infertile”

WHO: Single People Who Struggle to Find A Partner To Be Considered “Infertile”

I’m taken aback by some of the cranky comments by people who disagree with this decision. Take for example this (source):

Josephine Quintavalle, from Comment on Reproductive Ethics added: “This absurd nonsense is not simply re-defining infertility but completely side-lining the biological process and significance of natural intercourse between a man and a woman.

Well, excuse the hell out of me, Ms. Quintavalle, but some of us find ourselves single by circumstance – we had hoped to be married in our 20s or 30s but just could not find the right guy. I cannot get pregnant now because I have no husband to have sex with to get pregnant, by, HELLO.

You’re saying women like me shouldn’t be able to get help we need or want in having a kid of our own, if that is what we want (I never cared if I had one myself or not, but some women really want one). There is just no sympathy from some people for the circumstances other people find themselves in in life. I didn’t plan on turning out single well into my 40s, lady.

I don’t think that adult singleness should be thought of in a derogatory fashion as a “disability” (God knows we get enough of that condescending attitude from churches as it is), but I don’t see anything wrong with it pertaining to allowing singles who want to have  kid.

I’m also seeing one or two commentators who assume that single adults are more “selfish” than married couples, which is untrue and is (Link): the reverse!

(Link):   People Who Can’t Find Sex Partners Should Be Classified as ‘Disabled,’ Says World Health Organization

(Link):  Being Single Is Now a Disability, According to the World Health Organization

By Rhett Jones

For the WHO’s Dr. David Adamson, one of the authors of the new standards, this move is about creating medical equality. He says, “(Link): The definition of infertility is now written in such a way that it includes the rights of all individuals to have a family, and that includes single men, single women, gay men, gay women.”

Continue reading “WHO: Single People Who Struggle to Find A Partner To Be Considered “Infertile””

62-Year-Old New Mom Encourages Older Women to have Babies

62-Year-Old New Mom Encourages Older Women to have Babies

I first saw this story tweeted by Drudge, and lord-a-mercy, the folks leaving Tweets under it are judgmental little jerk-weeds.

Why do people care if women like this want to have a kid over the age of 50?

I find it hypocritical, too. Society puts all this pressure on women to have kids, and so, if a woman does have a kid, they pick apart when she has a kid, how many she has, does she use birth control or not to space them out, and on and on it goes.

Shut the hell up culture! Stop nit-picking apart women’s choices on when, if, how, or where they have a kid.

(Link): 62-year-old new mom encourages older women to have babies

Excerpts:

A 62-year-old woman from Spain has become a new mom.  Lina Alvarez of Lugo, in northwest Spain gave birth to a girl she named Lina.  She says “it’s impossible to be happier” at having her baby late in life.

Baby Lina was born on October 10th.  She was born a month early due to mom’s blood pressure problems and weighed 5 pounds and 2 ounces.  Lina is Alvarez’s third child.  Her oldest child is 27-years-old and she also has a 10-year-old.

Continue reading “62-Year-Old New Mom Encourages Older Women to have Babies”

Single, 54, and a New Dad: Why Some Start Families Late by A. Ellin

Single, 54, and a New Dad: Why Some Start Families Late

(Link):  Single, 54, and a New Dad: Why Some Start Families Late by A. Ellin

Excerpts:

August 5, 2016

SPARKY CAMPANELLA never heard the thrumming of a biological clock. But his “sociological clock” — his sense that he was missing out on something important in life — boomed mightily. At the age of 54, he decided to do something about it. He became a father.

He was single, but so what? “I decided I could either do it myself, or wait for the right partner to come along,” said Mr. Campanella, a Los Angeles fine arts photographer whose son, Rhys, is a little over 1 year old. Over the years he had dated women who had children of their own, but he realized that he didn’t want to be a stepdad.

….It’s a question many childless people over 50 are asking themselves. Of course, dealing with night feedings and rambunctious 2-year-olds are not for the faint of heart. But with their finances in order and their careers in place, with their life spans extended, some older people are concluding: Why not start — or continue — raising children in later life?

Continue reading “Single, 54, and a New Dad: Why Some Start Families Late by A. Ellin”

With Menopause Reversal, Women Could Be Forever Fertile

With Menopause Reversal, Women Could Be Forever Fertile

(Link): With Menopause Reversal, Women Could Be Forever Fertile

The hot flashes, night sweats, and vaginal dryness characteristic of menopause may no longer also signal the end of a woman’s fertility thanks to a blood treatment used to heal wounds.

Presenting their findings at the European Society of Human Reproduction and Embryology annual meeting in Helsinki, Finland, this month, researchers in Greece said they were able to reverse menopause in roughly 30 women, including one who entered menopause at 40 but five years later menstruated again, reports (Link): New Scientist.

Continue reading “With Menopause Reversal, Women Could Be Forever Fertile”

Why does society still view childless women like me with suspicion? by E. Day

Why does society still view childless women like me with suspicion?

(Link): Why does society still view childless women like me with suspicion? by E. Day

Excerpts:

  • Remarks like Leadsom’s go far beyond the usual cut-and-thrust of the political arena and reveal how (Link): childless women are still viewed with innate suspicion. This, in spite of the fact that women in their mid-40s are now almost twice as likely to be childless as their parents’ generation. One in five women born in 1969 is childless today, compared with one in nine women born in 1942.
  • But there remains a taboo, a retrograde belief that (Link): we are in some way unnatural for not fulfilling our biological destiny. How else to explain the fact that the first question many people ask when I meet them is whether I have children, followed by an uncomfortable pause when I say that I don’t. “But why?” I can see them thinking. “What’s wrong with her?”

Continue reading “Why does society still view childless women like me with suspicion? by E. Day”

Mothers Over 40 in Record Baby Boom: Number of Women Who Give Birth in Their Fifth Decade or Later Trebles

Mothers Over 40 in Record Baby Boom: Number of Women Who Give Birth in Their Fifth Decade or Later Trebles

This article is from 2010. I could have sworn I already did a blog post on this, but I looked around my blog a little bit and don’t see it.

(Link): Mothers over 40 in record baby boom: Number of women who give birth in their fifth decade or later trebles

  • By Steve Doughty for the Daily Mail
  • A baby boom among older women has trebled the number giving birth after their 40th birthday.
  • Almost 27,000 babies were born to mothers over 40 last year, figures revealed yesterday.
  • The unprecedented level is nearly three times the total of 20 years ago and up by 50 per cent over the past decade.
  • Even during the post-war childbirth peak in the Sixties there were fewer children born to women in their fifth decade and beyond.
  • Britain now has one of the highest birth rates for older women in the world, with 3.8 per cent of all babies born to mothers over 40. Only Italy has a higher level in Europe.

Continue reading “Mothers Over 40 in Record Baby Boom: Number of Women Who Give Birth in Their Fifth Decade or Later Trebles”

Woman in Her 70s May Be Oldest Ever to Give Birth

Woman in Her 70s May Be Oldest Ever to Give Birth

(Link): Woman in Her 70s May Be Oldest Ever to Give Birth

Excerpts:

  • By ARSHAD R. ZARGAR & ASHLEY WELCH CBS NEWS
  • May 12, 2016, 3:23 PM
  • A woman in India could make the record books as one of the oldest ever to give birth.
  • Daljinder Kaur, who’s believed to be at least 70 years old, gave birth to a son named Arman (meaning “wish” in Hindi) on April 19. The baby was the first for Kaur and her 79-year-old husband, Mohinder Singh Gill, after nearly five decades of marriage.
  • “I feel blessed to be able to hold my own baby. I had lost hope of becoming a mother ever,” said Kaur, who underwent two years of (Link): IVF treatment and had two failed attempts earlier.

Continue reading “Woman in Her 70s May Be Oldest Ever to Give Birth”

Stop Pressuring Women to Be Moms: It’s Insulting to Assume We All Want The Same Thing by R K Bussel

Stop Pressuring Women to Be Moms: It’s Insulting to Assume We All Want The Same Thing by R K Bussel

(Link): Stop Pressuring Women to Be Moms: It’s Insulting to Assume We All Want The Same Thing

Excerpts

  • I used to wonder why my childfree friends were so adamant about what they didn’t want—but I get it now
  • We talk a lot about freedom of choice when it comes to reproduction, but there’s still one choice that women face an unconscionable amount of backlash over: the decision not to have kids. In an essay for (Link): Marie Claire, writer Starre Vartan details the opposition she’s faced in the dating and medical arenas over her choice to remain childfree, with a gynecologist telling her “That’s what we’re here for” and two boyfriends deliberately removing condoms during sex in a disgusting attempt to force her to change her mind:
  • “I…explained how terrified I was, physically and mentally, to be pregnant, to care for needy small humans. Two different, otherwise wonderful, handsome, and brilliant men said they ‘understood’ after I opened up about my fears. And then they each promptly sabotaged the birth control that I was very strict about.”
  • Assuming that all women automatically want kids is insulting—to everyone. It insults those who do plan to have kids or are parents already by diminishing the sheer amount of physical and emotional labor that goes into the undertaking. It insults those who don’t want kids, or aren’t sure, by elevating motherhood above every other option….
  • …Nobody wins by coercing someone else into becoming a parent, or making someone feel guilty, damaged or ostracized for not wanting kids.

Continue reading “Stop Pressuring Women to Be Moms: It’s Insulting to Assume We All Want The Same Thing by R K Bussel”

Why Being a Childless Woman is Rarely a Simple Case of Choice or Infertility – Childless by Circumstance by J. Day

Please note all you are getting here is a long excerpt. I did not paste in the whole article. The author discusses how she tried IVF at one time, or she considered using IVF, if I remember correctly.

(Link): Why being a childless woman is rarely a simple case of choice or infertilityby J Day

  • An estimated 80% of women who don’t have children are ‘childless by circumstance’, rather than choice or medical reasons
  • Feb 28, 2016
  • Before I became a statistic, by reaching my mid-forties without having children, I thought, as many of us do, that there were two ways to become a childless woman: you either didn’t want them (“child-free”) or you were infertile.
  • It has been estimated that 80 per cent of women who don’t have children are “childless by circumstance”, a phrase coined by the Australian academic Dr Leslie Cannold in her 2005 book, What, No Baby?
  • The figure comes from the work of Dr Renske Keizer, a professor at Erasmus University Rotterdam, who in a 2010 meta-analysis of data from the Netherlands and the US estimated that 10 per cent of women without children are childless by choice, 10 per cent for medical reasons, and 80 per cent by circumstance.
  • Applied to statistics about UK women, it can be estimated that there are (or shortly will be) almost 1.5 million women in their forties and fifties here who won’t have children, with only 10 per cent of those being unambiguously by choice.
  • ….Perhaps the most difficult-to-digest reason for childlessness is that of never having been in a suitable relationship.

Continue reading “Why Being a Childless Woman is Rarely a Simple Case of Choice or Infertility – Childless by Circumstance by J. Day”

Facebook’s motherhood challenge makes me want to punch my computer screen by F. Everett

Facebook’s motherhood challenge makes me want to punch my computer screen by F. Everett

I am friends with people on Facebook who have told me in private that their mother friends – one lady is Facebook friends with a sister of hers who has three kids – are actually terrible parents in real life.

Yet, these same terrible mothers who blather on about how wonderful their children are when they are on Facebook, who post scads of posts of their smiling kids, yell and scream at the kids in real life – or neglect them.

Remember that every time you see posts by parents on Facebook, with their sweet family snaps, who are bragging about their children. They are often times selectively editing their social media to present a glossy, happy version of their life that may not be real most of the time.

(Link):  Facebook’s motherhood challenge makes me want to punch my computer screen by F. Everett

(Link): Mommy Blogger Confesses in Blog Post that Mommy Blogging is a Bunch of Fake, Happy-Clappy B.S. – Kind of Like Most Christian Adult Singleness Blogs

  • Of course it’s meant to be a bit of fun, but this smug club fetishises motherhood, and creates a new way to measure women and find them wanting
  • There are certain phrases that make my heart sink. After “Can I be really honest?” and “Mind if I join you, ladies?” the latest to engender a sense of creeping misery must surely be (Link):Facebook motherhood challenge.Of uncertain origin, this viral “challenge” demands that mothers post a series of pictures that make them “proud to be a mum” and then tag other women who they think are “great mothers”.
  • Many of my friends have done this, bouncily posting shots of themselves with interchangeable babies, all of whom look like glow-worms in padded snowsuits, and tagging whole lists of other “awesome mums” inviting them to do the same.
  • And while I fully understand that they have no intention of hurting anyone, that they are simply happy to have their wonderful children, #blessed, #lovinglife and so on, I still want to punch the screen of my computer in whenever a new one pops up.
  •  The most offensive aspect of this is the idea that it’s a “challenge” at all.
  • A challenge is coping with grief when you wish you were dead, or pushing your mind and body to the limit in a feat of superhuman endurance. It’s not posting a few snaps of your toddler and waiting for your friends to type “aw gorgeous hun xxx” underneath. And it’s unclear whether the challenge in question is to prove what a great mother you are, or merely to challenge your friends to prove that they are too.
  •  This insidious idea of (Link): motherhood as a beatific vocational calling began with the Virgin Mary, and reached its peak with the Victorian notion of “the angel of the hearth”, when mothers who didn’t have to work, and had nannies and housekeepers and nursery maids rushing about looking after their children, were depicted as celestial beings radiating goodness, their sole purpose on Earth to gather little children to their rustling taffeta bosoms and gently instruct them.

Continue reading “Facebook’s motherhood challenge makes me want to punch my computer screen by F. Everett”

Christian Publication Seems To Take Stance Against Uterus Transplants

Christian Publication Seems To Take Stance Against Uterus Transplants

This page appears on Christian news site, World.

(Link):  Will uterus transplants eventually violate all natural boundaries?

  • The Cleveland Clinic this month (Link): announced it would begin a clinical trial of uterus transplants—taking uteri from dead women and transplanting them into healthy women in their twenties and thirties who have ovaries but lack a uterus (an uncommon problem accounting for 3 percent of female infertility).

I would take it that the publication is against the idea of women getting a uterus transplant. It is again, a Christian magazine.

I have no idea why Christians are so hypocritical on this matter, that they pressure and shame women into having children, yet, if a woman has problems conceiving, they condemn her for availing herself of medical technology to help.

I wrote of this topic more here, in an earlier blog post:

(Link):  Hypocrisy: Conservative Christians / Catholics Pressure Women To Feel Their Only Worth is in Becoming Mothers, But If Women Try to Use Medical Technology to Get Pregnant, the Women Are Condemned by The Same Groups

———————–

Related:

(Link):   Marriage, Parenthood, Judgment by Christians and Non Christians – You Can’t Win No Matter What Choice You Make

(Link): Praying for a Child – The Catholic Church makes life impossible for infertile women.

(Link):  A Woman’s Fertility is Her Own Business, not Everyone Else’s by L. Bates

(Link): Baby Making Fixation at Christianity Today Magazine Online – Shaming Women For Not Procreating, or For Delaying Motherhood, or For Limiting the Number of Children

(Link):  Hypocrisy in Christian Culture – Those who idolize parenting chide infertiles for trying to have kids

(Link):  “Who is my mother and who are my brothers?” – one of the most excellent Christian rebuttals I have seen against the Christian idolatry of marriage and natalism, and in support of adult singleness and celibacy – from CBE’s site

(Link): Pro-Life, Yet Anti-Celibacy, Anti-Childless Christian Site Tweets Story about Mother Who Slit New Born Infant Son’s Throat to Save Her Sex Life (Christians equating single or childless / childfree women to women who murder their babies)

(Link): Pro-Life, Christian Sites that Flirt With Denigrating Singleness and Childlessness In Their Quest to Argue Against Abortion / Re Eric Metaxas etc

(Link): Renting a Womb – Women Reduced to Baby Breeders (editorial from CP)

(Link):  Remaining childless can be wise and meaningful. The pope should know Gaby Hinsliff

(Link): Christians Advise Singles To Follow Certain Dating Advice But Then Shame, Criticize, or Punish Singles When That Advice Does Not Work

(Link):  Why do we still have to justify the choice to be child-free? by H. Freeman

(Link):  Are Marriage and Family A Woman’s Highest Calling? by Marcia Wolf – and other links that address the Christian fallacy that a woman’s most godly or only proper role is as wife and mother

Hypocrisy: Conservative Christians / Catholics Pressure Women To Feel Their Only Worth is in Becoming Mothers, But If Women Try to Use Medical Technology to Get Pregnant, the Women Are Condemned by The Same Groups

Hypocrisy: Conservative Christians / Catholics Pressure Women To Feel Their Only Worth is in Becoming Mothers, But If Women Try to Use Medical Technology to Get Pregnant, the Women Are Condemned by The Same Groups


LANGUAGE ALERT. I blow up a few places in this blog post and use dirty words, including dropping the “F” bomb once or twice.


Thank God I never felt a strong tug or urge to have children. I never cared if I had one or not. I’ve never measured my value or womanhood by if I had a kid or not. THANK GOD.

I feel sorry for women who really, really wanted a kid but were unable to have one, whatever the reason. Women are under a lot of pressure, even from secular culture, to have children. Women who don’t have kids are either viewed with suspicion or with pity.

I have blogged on this topic two or three times before. The editorial I link to below is focused on Roman Catholics, but I have seen a small number of Protestants write editorials condemning IVF and the like as well.

This makes my blood boil.

These Catholic and conservative Protestant (and Baptists) shame women into having children, conveying the notion that a woman’s only value resides in things like getting pregnant and having babies.

If a woman therefore buys into this propaganda and desperately tries to have a baby (or even if she just wants to have a baby, Christian propaganda aside), these same Christian groups criticize these ladies (and their husbands, if their husbands are on board) for using medical technology to conceive.

These Christians tell women they must have babies, that they are obligated to have babies. Christians pressure and nag women to have babies.

But when or if women then have to turn to medical science to conceive because they or their spouse have fertility issues, these natalistic- obsessed Christians condemn them for it.

I cannot begin to communicate how angry this makes me. These groups are putting people into no-win situations, then blaming them for a system, or for failing to meet a set of values, that they themselves created!

It rather reminds me of Jesus’ condemnation of the Pharisees, when he said to them something like,

  • “How dare you put burdens on to people’s shoulders but then refuse to do so much as lend a finger to lift those same burdens.”

It’s the same exact phenomenon.

It also reminds me a tad of Christians who shame and pressure adult singles to marry, but if we singles try to actually get married, take action to make it happen – by flirting, by going to bars to meet other singles, or by using dating sites, or asking church members to fix us up on dates – we gets scolded for trying to do what they tell us we should be doing!

We singles are supposed to just sit with our hands neatly folded on our laps, wait, and pray and hope that God happens to send a spouse across our paths, with no action on our part to make it come to pass. This has been a losing strategy – which is taught by a lot of Christians – for a lot of singles, including me.

For the love of Frank, if you do not approve of IVF (or whatever fertility programs), or, if you do not approve of Christians using dating sites or visiting bars to meet potential mates in an attempt to make marriage come about, stop lecturing or pressuring people to have children or to marry in the first place! Stop treating the childless, child free, or the singles as though they are failures or second class citizens!

You cannot dictate both the what and the how. Pick one or the other.

Or better yet, stop telling people how they should live their lives, and stop telling them that “X” is the only appropriate way or age to make something (marriage, having kids, whatever) happen.

The Bible actually does NOT command anyone to marry or have children and does not specify an age by which it “should” happen – Jesus Christ, the founder of Christianity, never married nor had kids, and Paul said in 1 Cor. 7 it is better to stay single (and hence celibate and child free).

One portion of the article reads:

  • …Not all Catholic bio-ethicists even believe every couple deserves to be parents. “If a couple decides they have the right to a child, the child has become a commodity,” Marie Hilliard, director of bioethics and public policy at the National Catholic Bioethics Center in Philadelphia, (Link): told Religion News Service last year. “And if they haven’t been given the gift of a child, it doesn’t mean they have the right to a child as commodity.”

This ticks me off very much.

Who are these douche bags to say some people don’t “deserve”  to be parents? Unless we are talking about people who would abuse any kids they have, these bio-ethicists are wrong.

Who are they to say who “deserves to have kids” or not? The ego here is amazing.

Just because a couple wants to have a kid does not mean they view children as “commodities,” give me a fucking break, Hilliard.

This reminds me of Christians who hound adult singles to get married, and if we say yes, we’d like to get married and are using dating sites to pursue that course of action, they then say, “You must stop, for you have made marriage into an idol.”

These groups set up something that they say everyone should have or do, but if that something is out of reach and would require a person to take additional steps (using IVF, or using dating sites, what have you), they then condemn these people.

For fuck’s sake. Stop, stop, stop pressuring people to think they have to do “X” in life, but if they cannot do “X” on their own, but have to get outside help to achieve “X,” don’t sit there and chide them for getting that outside help to do something you say they should be doing to start with.

What a bunch of double-standard holding, hypocritical ASSHOLES – they put unrealistic standards and burdens on people and tell them they cannot do anything to change or improve whatever the situation is. This kind of thing just drives me nuts, I swear.

Here is the article:

(Link): Begotten Not Made: The Vatican Doesn’t Want IVF Babies by B L Nadeau

  • The logic of the Catholic Church rules out many techniques used to help infertile couples.
  • … Catholic dogma may be “pro-life” and certainly pro-creation (and anti-contraception), but only for the fertile.

Continue reading “Hypocrisy: Conservative Christians / Catholics Pressure Women To Feel Their Only Worth is in Becoming Mothers, But If Women Try to Use Medical Technology to Get Pregnant, the Women Are Condemned by The Same Groups”