What Two Religions Tell Us About the Modern Dating Crisis (from TIME)
This article (see link to it much farther below) primarily focuses on Jews and Mormons, but it is still very interesting, and I think has things to say about other religious types.
I have done previous posts about the shortage of single adult men among Mormons (Link): here.
There is an interactive map on the page (the TIME article linked to below), where, if you run your mouse over it, right above it, it will tell you the ratio of men to women in your city.
One thing I think that is contributing to why Baptist, evangelical, and other Christian women are staying single so long – among the ones who want to marry – is the Christian belief in “equally yoked,” where Christians pressure Christian women to marry only Christian men.
I’ve already chucked that teaching aside a few years ago, but am not ready to date just yet. Whenever I do start dating again, this time, I am fully open and prepare to date Non-Christian men.
There really are no Christian men to date, and many of the ones who are self professing believers are creeps – serial rapists, killers, etc. (see (Link): this list on my blog for examples). If a Christian woman wants to marry these days, she will really have no choice BUT to marry an atheist or some other sort of Non-Christian.
(Link): Sorry, ladies, there really is a man shortage (New York Post)
(Link): What Two Religions Tell Us About the Modern Dating Crisis (from TIME) by J. Birger
Believe it or not, the rise in Mormon breast implants and $100,000 Jewish dowries can explain why you’re alone on Friday night
That’s the one thing that always came up when I’d discuss theories on declining marriage rates or the rise of the hookup culture with my friends or family.
“Couldn’t it just be that times have changed?” people would ask.
Times have changed, and that is a good thing—especially the fading-away of cruel taboos that once stigmatized women who engaged in premarital sex or bore children out of wedlock.
Thing is, times change for a reason. The values question assumes that sexual mores loosen naturally from conservative to liberal. In reality, these values have ebbed and flowed throughout history, often in conjunction with prevailing sex ratios.
Today, mainstream dating guides tell the everything-going-for-her career woman it’s her fault she’s still single—she just needs to play hard to get or follow a few simple rules to snag Mr. Right. But the problem is a demographic one.
Multiple studies show that college-educated Americans are increasingly reluctant to marry those lacking a college degree. This bias is having a devastating impact on the dating market for college-educated women. Why?
According to 2012 population estimates from the U.S. Census Bureau’s American Community Survey, there are 5.5 million college-educated women in the U.S. between the ages of 22 and 29 versus 4.1 million such men. That’s four women for every three men. Among college grads age 30 to 39, there are 7.4 million women versus 6.0 million men—five women for every four men.
It’s not that He’s Just Not That Into You—it’s that There Just Aren’t Enough of Him.
Lopsided gender ratios don’t just make it statistically harder for college-educated women to find a match. They change behavior too. According to sociologists, economists and psychologists who have studied sex ratios throughout history, the culture is less likely to emphasize courtship and monogamy when women are in oversupply. Heterosexual men are more likely to play the field, and heterosexual women must compete for men’s attention.
Of course, tales of scarce men and sexual permissiveness in ancient Sparta won’t convince everyone, so I began to explore the demographics of modern religion. I wanted to show that god-fearing folks steeped in old-fashioned values are just as susceptible to the effects of shifting sex ratios as cosmopolitan, hookup-happy 20-somethings who frequent Upper East Side wine bars.
Eventually I hit pay dirt.
Continue reading “What Two Religions Tell Us About the Modern Dating Crisis (from TIME) (ie, Why Are Conservative Religious Women Not Marrying Even Though They Want to Be Married. Hint: It’s a Demographics Issue)”