Dude Writes to Miss Manners Advice Columnist: “Miss Manners: No one Ever Replies to Me on Dating Sites”
WARNING. The following post contains “Adult” language
Before I paste the letter from the single guy to Miss Manners in (farther below), let me say this:
Let me explain to you clueless men out there the REAL reason women do not send you a polite rejection letter when you message them on dating sites:
Because 98% of men out there, men of all ages on dating sites, do NOT handle rejection gracefully, but with insults laced with profanity (and often drenched with sexism), no matter HOW POLITELY and GENTLY the woman turns the dude down.
In the past, when I was on dating sites more often, and I would politely reply to a guy who winked at me or messaged me on a dating site and said to him something polite such as, “Thank you for your interest, but after looking over your profile, I don’t think we’re compatible, but I hope you meet someone of your liking very soon!”
And for that trouble, the guy in question would reply thusly to me (this was a typical reply I’d get from men whom I turned down gently – this was not an exception, but a general rule):
“Fuck you! I didn’t like you any way. You are a fat, ugly cow.
I see from your profile you work as an ‘X’, your career is in “Z” field. I bet you only make $40,000 a year, which is not a lot.
Well, I am a 6 ft 4 inch hunk of man, I stay in shape, I am sexy, I work as a ritzy investment banker and make $250,000 a year!
I own a Porsche and a BMW. I go skiing in the Alps twice a year. I have met Bruce Springsteen in person TWICE and got his autograph.
Any woman would want me. You are a stupid slut for turning me down! Go fuck yourself, and I hope you get raped!!”
Yep, that is the usual reply a woman gets on dating sites when she turns a guy down, even if she is super sweet in how she goes about it.
I often wonder why these assholes bother “winking” at me, or messaging me on these sites, in the first place, when, after I reject them, they shoot back with, “You’re an ugly bitch.”
Well, my dear, my photos are in plain site on my profile, and if you felt I was an ugly bitch the whole time, why did you bother to flirt with me? If you don’t consider a woman nice, smart, and pretty in the first place, then do NOT message her on this site, you moron.
To those types of men in real life and on dating sites: You sore loser. Grow up. Learn to handle rejection better and with aplomb, instead of lashing out at women who aren’t interested. YOU RUDE LOSER.
DEAR MISS MANNERS:
I am a male member of a popular dating website. When I read the profile of someone I’d like to meet, I write them a personalized letter pointing out some of our common interests, adding a bit of levity where I can, suggesting we meet for coffee and conversation. These letters generally run from five to eight sentences. In other words, I’ve put some effort into it.