Dad Buys Full-Page $900 Newspaper Ad Seeking a Wife for His 48 Year Old, Never Married Son

Dad Buys Full-Page $900 Newspaper Ad Seeking a Wife for His 48 Year Old, Never Married Son

I hope this father realizes that men over 40 who father kids are more likely to father a kid with various diseases, see link 1, link 2, link 3.

(Link): Dad places newspaper ad to find wife for son

(Link):  Dad seeks ‘wife’ for 48-year-old son with full-page newspaper ad

(Link):  Wife wanted: Dad places spouse-needed ad in Idaho newspaper

  • The ad gives a brief description of Brooks, including a photo with the disclaimer, “I look just like my picture, except I now have grey hair.” The “About You” section states applicants “Will be attractive being height and weight proportional.” It also goes on to say that applicants should be prepared to have children with Brooks and also be a stay-at- home mom.

(Link):  MEDDLING BEVERLY HILLS DAD PUTS OUT FULL-PAGE AD TO FIND 48-YEAR-OLD SON A WIFE

  • He said his father has been ill and wants a grandson to carry on the family name.Brooks compared his father to Larry David’s character in the TV series “Curb Your Enthusiasm,” saying he “thinks he does the right thing, and then it all blows up in his face.”

    He said he’d never buy an ad like this himself, but “it’s worth a shot. Can’t hurt.”

(Link):  Full-page newspaper ad seeking wife

(Link): Dad Buys Full-Page $900 Newspaper Ad Seeking a Wife for His 48 Year Old, Never Married Son

  • One father in Beverly Hills is trying to find his son a wife the old-fashioned way.
  • Arthur Brooks, 78, spent $900 on a full-page ad in Idaho’s Coeur d’Alene Press newspaper using the headline “Looking For a Wife.”

Continue reading “Dad Buys Full-Page $900 Newspaper Ad Seeking a Wife for His 48 Year Old, Never Married Son”

Man Alone At Zoo Accused of Being Pedophile For Taking Photos Around Public Fountain

Man Alone At Zoo Accused of Being Pedophile For Taking Photos Around Public Fountain

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  • I would not be surprised if (Link): my Blog Stalker, John Morgan, still visits my blog (and sometimes my Twitter account) and steals links and story ideas to blog on at his blog. He’ll probably swipe the following story I found and feature it on his own blog. Stop taking content from my blog, Morgan.
  • JOHN MORGAN: Don’t sit there and accuse me of being “untrustworthy” merely because I blog under a pen name and then turn around and use stories I put on my blog on yours.
  • If you believe I am “untrustworthy,” stop using my material. You cannot have it both ways. Get off my blog – and don’t visit my Twitter, either.

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I am unclear if the man in this story is married or not. He might be married.

Regardless, he is a photographer who went to a zoo alone.

He wanted to take photos of the architecture around the zoo.

Some women saw him taking photos, and automatically assumed that an adult alone snapping photos must be a pedophile.

The women got the zoo security involved – and I think local police eventually got involved, too. The guy showed the content of his camera to the security or the cops, which showed no photos of kids on it.

The guy was kicked out of the zoo for the remainder of the day.

I did a blog post about this a long time ago, but various studies have shown that the majority of pedophiles are MARRIED MEN – not single ones. Therefore, the women in this news story need to be more paranoid of married men.

(Link):   Man accused of taking photos of young girls banned from Zoo Miami

  • by Amanda Batchelor – Senior Digital Editor
  • Posted: 3:28 PM, May 11, 2016Updated: 10:12 AM, May 12, 2016
  • Woman says man was taking photos of girls in bathing suits
  • MIAMI – A man was asked not to return to Zoo Miami after he was caught by a parent taking photos of young girls, Zoo Miami spokesman Ron Magill said.

Continue reading “Man Alone At Zoo Accused of Being Pedophile For Taking Photos Around Public Fountain”

Woman Burned To Death For Refusing Marriage Proposal

Woman Burned To Death For Refusing Marriage Proposal

And there are some whiny, cry-baby men who think THEY have single life harder – news flash, (Link): you don’t have it worse, men: men usually are not murdered by jealous women over turning down dates or proposals.

While I’d say that the root of this case involves a lot of misogyny and patriarchy, I think perhaps a small factor is an over-emphasis upon marriage.

Perhaps if cultures like this one were taught that being single and/or celibate are perfectly fine lifestyles to live, we wouldn’t see people feel so pressured to marry, and they would realize they can control their sexual urges. Therefore, women would not be killed for turning down dates, requests for sex, or marriage proposals.

You don’t have to be married, or have sex, to enjoy life or be happy and content. (I am not knocking a desire to be married, you realize, only saying if it does not happen for you, you will survive – and realize you can enjoy life without marriage or sex.)

Dollars to doughnuts that everyone in this news story was Muslim.

If so, I’d like to say again I see striking parallels between Islamic attitudes and behaviors towards women as I do from some gender complementarian or Quiverfull Christian groups, as well as sexist men and MRA (Men’s Rights Activists) groups – they all treat women like second-class citizens to be controlled by men and are considered to have value only in- so- far as they breed like rabbits and/or provide men with sex.

(Link): Pakistani woman dies after being set on fire for rejecting marriage proposal

  • By Azadeh Ansari and Sophia Saifi, CNN
  • Updated 11:47 AM ET, Thu June 2, 2016
  • Islamabad, Pakistan (CNN)- An 18-year-old Pakistani schoolteacher died Wednesday from injuries after her body was set on fire for refusing a marriage proposal, police said.
  • The perpetrators beat Maria Abbasi, then drenched her in petrol and set her body ablaze before leaving her for dead, her family members told CNN.
  • Continue reading “Woman Burned To Death For Refusing Marriage Proposal”

    Scary Single Ladies: Rebecca Traister Explains Why Single Women Frighten The Hell Out Of The GOP

    Scary Single Ladies: Rebecca Traister Explains Why Single Women Frighten The  Hell Out Of The GOP

    Sometimes some of these reviews of Traister’s book, or interviews with her, bring up how so many Republicans often demonize or criticize single motherhood.

    I happen to be a Republican myself, someone who was raised in a traditional Christian home.

    One thing I don’t get is how so many other Republicans and Christians do in fact constantly bad-mouth single motherhood, but out of the other side of their mouths, they frequently complain that not enough women are having babies.

    It ticks these types of Republicans and Christians off that baby-making rates have declined a bit in the last decade or whatever (see this link for example).

    So, on the one hand, my fellow Republicans complain about women having babies (women who happen to be single), but then turn around and complain and gripe about women NOT having babies.

    Christians and Republicans are somewhat inconsistent on this point. They might argue that women should marry first, and then make a baby with their spouse, but this is part of the problem: plenty of women WANT to marry, but there are no eligible males for them to marry (see this link or this link for more).

    And, of course, there are married women who cannot have babies because they are infertile, or some may choose to forgo motherhood – and their choices should be respected, not condemned.

    Another thing that bothers me about this conservative demonizing of single motherhood is that I suspect one view that undergirds it is that they believe that marriage or parenthood supposedly makes adults more mature, responsible or godly, which is simply (Link): not true (and see this link and this link).

    (There are a lot of conservative Christians who have taught or said that people only become mature or responsible when they marry or have a kid.)

    The Bible does not teach that marriage or parenthood are necessary to make a person more godly, loving, responsible, or mature.

    And even every day common sense and observation bears that out: we’ve all known, or heard of, married parents who are immature, greedy, or immoral swine.

    Disclaimer:

    • I am right wing and have been a Republican for years. However, I don’t always agree with Republicans on everything.
      I do occasionally agree with some of the left wing’s criticism of right wingers, and concerning how dismally right wingers treat singles, I agree with them on that.

    The link I give you here is from a left wing site, by Amanda Marcotte, a liberal feminist who is (Link): sometimes hypocritical about women’s sexual issues.

    Even though I completely disagree with Marcotte on some topics, I did find myself agreeing with some of the content of this interview she had with this book author:

    (Link):  Scary single ladies: Rebecca Traister explains why single women frighten the hell out of the GOP by Amanda Marcotte

    Excerpts:

    • Author Rebecca Traister’s new book on single women looks at how this growing population is reshaping America
    • Author Rebecca Traister’s last book, “Big Girls Don’t Cry,” took a comprehensive look at how the 2008 elections changed everything for American women.
    • Now she’s back with a similarly pop music-themed title, “All the Single Ladies: Unmarried Women and the Rise of an Independent Nation,” an examination of the role single women have played in American culture, both in our history and in our current times.
    • (Link): Single women are a potent political force in a way that they never have been before, making up nearly a quarter of the electorate and leaning to the left of both men and their married counterparts.
    • This, along with a whole host of inchoate fears about what happens when women are left to their own devices without male supervision, has led to a rash of conservative pundits and politicians denouncing the ladies who aren’t married. I interviewed Traister about this moral panic over single women and what it means for the culture at large.
    • [Question to the book author]: In your book, you detail how obsessed the conservative media has become with single women, who clearly anger right-wing pundits. The most hilarious quote you pull is Rush Limbaugh whining, “What is it with all these young, single, white women?” What is it with these conservative pundits focusing on single women?
    • It was just a couple of weeks (Link): after his tirade of Sandra Fluke that he made those comments about another woman who had written a book.
    • The fact that he said “white,” well, there are these versions of single womanhood that we are presented and the version that threatens most, is the white, privileged women.
    • Sandra Fluke testifying in front of Congress, women who are writing books, Murphy Brown, and Anita Hill, even though she’s not white, a lawyer appeared for Clarence Thomas.
    • There is a kind of woman who is economically powerful, professionally powerful who threatens a white male grip on power that has a long historic precedent in the country. Independent women living outside of marriage threaten all kinds of things about the way power is supposed to work.
    • What if reproduction is taken outside that version of male control? What if women are competing?

    Continue reading “Scary Single Ladies: Rebecca Traister Explains Why Single Women Frighten The Hell Out Of The GOP”

    Facebook’s motherhood challenge makes me want to punch my computer screen by F. Everett

    Facebook’s motherhood challenge makes me want to punch my computer screen by F. Everett

    I am friends with people on Facebook who have told me in private that their mother friends – one lady is Facebook friends with a sister of hers who has three kids – are actually terrible parents in real life.

    Yet, these same terrible mothers who blather on about how wonderful their children are when they are on Facebook, who post scads of posts of their smiling kids, yell and scream at the kids in real life – or neglect them.

    Remember that every time you see posts by parents on Facebook, with their sweet family snaps, who are bragging about their children. They are often times selectively editing their social media to present a glossy, happy version of their life that may not be real most of the time.

    (Link):  Facebook’s motherhood challenge makes me want to punch my computer screen by F. Everett

    (Link): Mommy Blogger Confesses in Blog Post that Mommy Blogging is a Bunch of Fake, Happy-Clappy B.S. – Kind of Like Most Christian Adult Singleness Blogs

    • Of course it’s meant to be a bit of fun, but this smug club fetishises motherhood, and creates a new way to measure women and find them wanting
    • There are certain phrases that make my heart sink. After “Can I be really honest?” and “Mind if I join you, ladies?” the latest to engender a sense of creeping misery must surely be (Link):Facebook motherhood challenge.Of uncertain origin, this viral “challenge” demands that mothers post a series of pictures that make them “proud to be a mum” and then tag other women who they think are “great mothers”.
    • Many of my friends have done this, bouncily posting shots of themselves with interchangeable babies, all of whom look like glow-worms in padded snowsuits, and tagging whole lists of other “awesome mums” inviting them to do the same.
    • And while I fully understand that they have no intention of hurting anyone, that they are simply happy to have their wonderful children, #blessed, #lovinglife and so on, I still want to punch the screen of my computer in whenever a new one pops up.
    •  The most offensive aspect of this is the idea that it’s a “challenge” at all.
    • A challenge is coping with grief when you wish you were dead, or pushing your mind and body to the limit in a feat of superhuman endurance. It’s not posting a few snaps of your toddler and waiting for your friends to type “aw gorgeous hun xxx” underneath. And it’s unclear whether the challenge in question is to prove what a great mother you are, or merely to challenge your friends to prove that they are too.
    •  This insidious idea of (Link): motherhood as a beatific vocational calling began with the Virgin Mary, and reached its peak with the Victorian notion of “the angel of the hearth”, when mothers who didn’t have to work, and had nannies and housekeepers and nursery maids rushing about looking after their children, were depicted as celestial beings radiating goodness, their sole purpose on Earth to gather little children to their rustling taffeta bosoms and gently instruct them.

    Continue reading “Facebook’s motherhood challenge makes me want to punch my computer screen by F. Everett”

    Friends say couple can’t be busy if they don’t have kids (advice column)

    Friends say couple can’t be busy if they don’t have kids

    Yes, people who are parents tend to have all kinds of condescending assumptions about the childless or childfree.

    Parents do tend to assume that those without children have buttloads of free time where all they do is sit around sipping margaritas or twiddling their thumbs, or, some of them assume that your life lacks true meaning or depth unless and until you have kids.

    Here is another example (for those of you parents who do NOT make these snotty assumptions about your childless or childfree friends, thank you).

    Friends say couple can’t be busy if they don’t have kids

    • Dear Carolyn: I am a childless woman. My husband and I work hard, and we like the way things are in our life.
    • So how do I respond when my friends say, “You can’t be that busy, you don’t have kids”? I am on call 24 hours per day, seven days a week, and my husband works mid-shifts so we are quite busy.
    • We also run a small business from our home, and have pets and other hobbies.
    • I am stunned when I hear this and always feel like I am being excluded on purpose.
    • Do I just let these friends go or what?

    —————————–

    Related Posts:

    (Link):   Greedy, Entitled Mother Expects Her Childless Friend to Buy Daughter Computer, DVD Player, or Digital Tablet

    (Link):  Childless Couple Who Donates to Childrens Charities Lambasted by Snotty Adult Sister for Not Showering Her Kids with Christmas Presents – Parents Who Discriminate Against the Childless

    (Link):  Mothers Who Steal Handicapped Parking Spots from Disabled Woman and Act Rude When Confronted – Motherhood does not make women more loving, nurturing, godly, or mature

    (Link):  Why all the articles about being Child Free? On Being Childfree or Childless – as a Conservative / Right Wing / Christian

    Church to Members: We Honor Only Mothers With Biological, Not Adopted, Children (via Ask Amy)

    Church to Members: We Honor Only Mothers With Biological, Not Adopted, Children

    I don’t know what’s more frightening and sad, that Christians marginalize singles and the childless and childfree or exclude mothers of adopted children, or the Non-Christians (and some Christians too) who DENY these things even happen, or they express shock that it might.

    I saw some people leaving comments at an Ask Amy page expressing doubt that a church would or could be so callous towards certain types of mothers.

    I have no reason to doubt it. I would actually be surprised if this sort of thing did not happen. Evangelical, Baptist, and other churches/denominations, regularly ignore singles and childfree people, or mothers who don’t fit their particular criteria of what it means to them to be a good or “godly” mother.

    If they’re not ignoring these groups, they outright insult them or imply they are selfish or weird, or lacking in some other way.

    Here’s the letter to “Ask Amy” (link):

      Dear Amy:
      In the course of the worship service at our church on Mother’s Day, particular recognition was given to some distinct mothers — the oldest present, a single with the most youngsters, a single with most kids present, and so on.

      But this recognition was specified biological mothers only, so this excluded a number of in the congregation who had mothered adopted children.

      I’d like your comment on this restriction.
      — A Bio and Adoptive Mother

      Dear Mother: I’m appalled.

    I do not doubt the veracity of this story for a moment. Some churches or denominations can and often are that insensitive.

    At least Amy was appalled by this.

    In regards to other letters, Amy was catty about women who are over the age of 40 (link to that). Amy also thinks guys over 50 who befriend 22 year old college students are closet pedophiles (link to that).

    Churches should stop holding Mother’s Day celebrations. There is no place in Scripture that instructs churches to hold church-wide services in dedication to mothers or fathers. None. It’s a secular holiday carried over into churches, and churches should be spending more time preaching about Jesus, and less about the so-called nobility of motherhood.
    ——————————-
    Related posts:

    (Link): Mother Entitlement – Selfish, Self-Centered Mothers Complain that They Are Not Getting ENOUGH Mother Worship from Culture, Church, or Family on Mother’s Day and Some Moms Complain About Churches Showing Compassion to Childless Women

    (Link): Mother’s Day Ain’t A Happy Holiday For Some

    (Link): Being Childfree, Childless, Infertile, or Dealing With the Death of a Mother on Mother’s Day, Or Dealing With An Abusive or Insensitive Mother, Mothers Who Lost Adult or Young Children to Murder, Abortion, Miscarriages, or Sickness (links)

    (Link): Otherhood – An overlooked demographic – the Childless and Childfree Women and Singles Especially Women Who Had Hoped to Marry and Have Kids But Never Met Mr. Right (links)

    (Link): Motherhood is Not a Woman’s Highest or Only Calling

    Continue reading “Church to Members: We Honor Only Mothers With Biological, Not Adopted, Children (via Ask Amy)”

    Married Father and Baptist Preacher J D Hall – Another Example of How Marriage and Parenthood Does Not Make a Person More Godly or Mature

    Married Father and Baptist Preacher J D Hall – Another Example of How Marriage and Parenthood Does Not Make a Person More Godly or Mature

    (There is an update at the bottom of this post).

    This involves a lot of back story I don’t want to get into because this blog post would be ten pages long.

    I am blogging this primarily for adult singles who have felt marginalized or hurt by Christian denominations or churches that treat adult singles as though they have cooties.

    I have a somewhat different motivation for blogging about this than other blogs do. There were a few other blogs who addressed the child abuse aspect of the story, that we have an adult (Hall) badgering a teen kid (Braxton Caner) on the internet.

    J D Hall is a Calvinist preacher with a blog called “Pulpit and Pen,” a Twitter account, and a group of fan boys who follow him around online who actually refer to themselves as “Pulpiteers.”

    At one time, Hall’s groupies were using the #pulpiteer (or “pulpiteers”) hash to follow each other around Twitter. I’m not sure if they still use the “Pulpiteer” label or not. I will continue to refer to them as such.

    This group, and a few other people, have a long standing hatred of another guy named Ergun Caner.

    Continue reading “Married Father and Baptist Preacher J D Hall – Another Example of How Marriage and Parenthood Does Not Make a Person More Godly or Mature”

    Mother Entitlement – Selfish, Self-Centered Mothers Complain that They Are Not Getting ENOUGH Mother Worship from Culture, Church, or Family on Mother’s Day and Some Moms Complain About Churches Showing Compassion to Childless Women

    Mother Entitlement – Selfish, Self-Centered Mothers Complain that They Are Not Getting ENOUGH Mother Worship from Culture, Church, or Family on Mother’s Day and Some Moms Complain About Churches Showing Compassion to Childless Women

    I remember seeing posts like this (see link below) last year at Mother’s Day – there are actually mothers out there, including Christian and Mormon ones, who feel that their churches do not do ENOUGH to honor them on Mommy’s Day.

    Some mothers I’ve seen go further than that and insult or mock childless (or childfree) women in the comments of blogs that ask people to be more sensitive to the feelings of non mothers.

    These bitter, hate-filled mothers spit out, on such blogs, comments such as, “Screw the childless women, what about me, I work hard as a mom all year and DESERVE some recognition.”

    Yep, they are that blunt and nasty about it in their comments. (I have a real sample below, with a link to said blog, but it’s by a guy, not a lady, but it’s representative of the type of crap angry mothers who whine about being under-appreciated leave on blogs).

    No, I am not exaggerating, I have indeed seen a smattering of such vitriolic comments by mothers on various blogs the last two years, even on Christian blogs by women who claim they are Christian!

    Even though churches WORSHIP motherhood 24 hours a day, 365 days a year and hype it up on Mother’s Day itself even more so, these selfish mommy dolts think churches should worship mommy-hood EVEN MORE than they already do.

    Meanwhile, never-married, childless, divorced, widowed, and childfree adult women get absolutely NO HOLIDAYS in THEIR honor, so why should I care if mommies don’t feel honored enough on Mother’s Day?

    Some mothers are the most selfish, hateful people on the face of the planet.

    Some mothers expect and demand everyone around them in their families and at church to make a big fuss over them.

    I thought motherhood was supposed to be its own reward?

    If motherhood is so lofty, so noble, so high and mighty, and it supposedly makes a woman totally content, and you buy into Christian swill about mom-hood being a woman’s only, or most, godly role in life, why do you, little Ms. Entitled Mommy, need or want others to validate the position for you, by throwing you parties and handing you carnations in church services?

    I thought Christians said parenthood automatically makes a person more godly and giving than being single and child-free, or it works out that way over a period of years?

    That is not so, because I see many mothers online whining like little children that they don’t get enough attention and presents from their spouses or preachers on the holiday.

    I cannot believe how self absorbed and self centered some mothers are.

    Here is a link to a blog page by a Mormon woman –
    Note that while this woman is a Mormon but her points sound about identical to the average Baptist, Reformed, or Evangelical women I see online; just swap out “Mormon” with the word “Christian” and it reads the same:

    (Link): Taking Mom Out of Mother’s Day – Have We Gone Too Far?

    Excerpts:

      In a desire to be sensitive toward women who are unable to have children I’m concerned that, perhaps, on Mother’s Day, we may be going a bit too far. Not that we can ever be too compassionate in acknowledging the pain that surely accompanies the inability to have children, but at the same time we shouldn’t need to pull back in giving the much needed praise, encouragement and recognition of Moms’, who are actually raising, or have raised, children — and all that that entails.

    • …In order to be politically sensitive, in all circumstances, where the issue of how women fulfill their role as mothers comes into play, it is my observation that we are becoming increasingly comfortable with relegating actual Moms’ to the back of the bus — even on Mother’s Day. And frankly, that kind of bothers me.

    Here was the comment I left on her page (but it did not show up last I checked):

      Never-married and childless women such as myself get ZERO holidays for us. None. There are no cards for us. No cakes, no brunches.

    • Churches never have a “recognize and celebrate mature, celibate, never married, childless women” type of service, so I have a very hard time feeling sorry for mothers who feel their churches or communities are not doing enough to honor motherhood.

    Continue reading “Mother Entitlement – Selfish, Self-Centered Mothers Complain that They Are Not Getting ENOUGH Mother Worship from Culture, Church, or Family on Mother’s Day and Some Moms Complain About Churches Showing Compassion to Childless Women”

    Happy Mother’s Day From the Moms on Whisper Who Hate Their Kids

    Happy Mother’s Day From the Moms on Whisper Who Hate Their Kids

    (Link): Happy Mother’s Day From the Moms on Whisper Who Hate Their Kids by E G Ryan

      And so, in the ramp up to Mother’s Day, the anti-June Cleavers of the internet are venting their socially unacceptable frustrations on Whisper, the anonymous social network where users can leave their confessions for the world to see without attaching their real identities to their words.

    There are all flavors of moms who kind of hate it. Mothers who are fed up that their kids don’t realize how obnoxious they are:

    regretKids

    Mothers Admit to Regretting Having Children and/or Getting Married
    Mothers Admit to Regretting Having Children and/or Getting Married

    Other confesssions by parents:

    ✦ “I hate my son. I didn’t want a boy. I wanted a girl”

    Continue reading “Happy Mother’s Day From the Moms on Whisper Who Hate Their Kids”

    Condescending Remarks About Single and Childless Women on Christian Gender Complementarian Site: ‘Motherhood or Singleness: Which Is More Sanctifying?’

    Condescending Remarks About Single and Childless Women on Christian Gender Complementarian Site: ‘Motherhood or Singleness: Which Is More Sanctifying?’

    h/t Stuff Christian Culture Likes group (I would encourage you to visit (Link): that group’s comment thread about the link farther below).

    The link comes from True Woman, which I think is a Southern Baptist, gender complementarian hosted site

    There are married women who are infertile, or who keep having miscarriages. Apparently the author of the page, Colleen Chao, is unaware of that.

    Here is the link:

    (Link): Motherhood or Singleness: Which Is More Sanctifying?

    Anyway. Excerpt:

      by Colleen Chao

      [Because the author is now married with a kid] But I no longer have to sacrifice in the way my single friends do either: I won’t go to bed alone tonight, cry over unfulfilled passions, work a demanding full-time job to support myself, solitarily juggle all the details and demands of daily life, or feel like an anomaly at a table of all couples.

    I’m over 40, would like to be married, never have been. Never cared too much if I had a kid or not (kids are annoying).

    Yes, there are times I’m sad or angry about being single, but I also have many days where I’m okay with it.

    I do not appreciate this lady making my life sounds like it’s a total pathetic suck fest because I’m single and childless. Her post is just so very insulting to single, adult, childless women.

    It is remarkable to me how Christians will sometimes write these books or blog pages trying to re-assure single adults they are fine the way they are, and that God loves them even un-married and childless- but the tone of their whole piece, or certain comments, are so incredibly condescending, their piece has the exact opposite effect.

    And I don’t need someone patting me on the head telling me God loves me just as I am, that I’m okay as a single and childless woman… I already know.

    I don’t need your validation. How dare you assume that I do.

    People who do this are so arrogant and insensitive, but they think they are being supportive and loving.

    By the way, sanctification is an inward work of the Holy Spirit, not the work of singleness, parenting, or marriage.

    Anyway, it’s amazing how deeply insensitive these Christian writers can be. The woman who wrote that page probably thinks she is cheering on unmarried, childless women, when in reality, she is insulting their lives.

    Her editorial is hinting at, or implying, the somewhat common Christian false idea that singles and the childless are only “one half” a person, are not and cannot be fulfilled as a married parent, and not as worthy to God or culture.
    ————————-
    Related posts:

    (Link): The Holy Spirit Sanctifies a Person Not A Spouse – Weekly Christian Marriage Advice Column Pokes Holes in Christian Stereotype that Marriage Automatically Sanctifies People

    (Link): I’m Childless, Not Child-Incompetent (editorial by G. Dalfonzo) – The Christian Tendency to Worship Family, Motherhood, and Children

    (Link): Is The Church Failing Childless Women? by Diane Paddison

    (Link): Oh geeze. Another married Christian condescendingly patting single Christians on the head, reassuring them they are dandy as-is, and to remember they have the fictional Gift of Singleness

    (Link): Salvation By Marriage Alone – The Over Emphasis Upon Marriage by Conservative Christians Evangelicals Southern Baptists

    (Link): Astonishing: Evangelical Baptist Marriage Idolater David E. Prince Wants to Know Why Evangelical Baptists Are Not Worshipping Marriage More

    Married Mother charged after allegedly faking cancer and raising thousands in donations

    Mother charged after allegedly faking cancer and raising thousands in donations

    But… But… Christians say that women who are mothers are total saints, so godly, so pure, incapable of mean or selfish acts! They say parenthood instantly turns someone into a pillar of the community, someone who is more giving and ethical than a childless or child free woman.

    And she is married, too. Christians claim that singles are not as mature and responsible as marrieds, but that they are immature and not as grown up as marrieds.

    (Link): Mother charged after allegedly faking cancer and raising thousands in donations

      Mindy Taylor of Chillicothe, Ohio has been charged with felony theft after allegedly posing as a cancer patient and weaseling at least $21,000 in donations in an elaborate scheme said to have fooled her own family.
      BY NINA GOLGOWSKI
      NEW YORK DAILY NEWS Monday, April 21, 2014, 5:43 PM

      The 35-year-old married mother from Chillicothe, Ohio has been charged with felony theft after allegedly posing as a cancer patient and weaseling thousands of dollars in donations in a scheme said to have fooled her own family.

      The disturbing revelations of Taylor’s tear-jerker were revealed earlier this month after an anonymous tipster led to her surprisingly cancer-free medical records being subpoenaed, the Columbus Dispatch reported.

      Continue reading “Married Mother charged after allegedly faking cancer and raising thousands in donations”

    Sorry, but being a mother is not the most important job in the world by Catherine Deveny

    Sorry, but being a mother is not the most important job in the world, by Catherine Deveny

    Christians are guilty of, as this writer below says, “The deification of mothers.”

    Trust me on that one, as the voice of experience.

    Try being over 40, still a virgin – never married, no children – and you feel very excluded in many conservative churches.

    The exclusion against childless and older single women is not always deliberate in Christian culture, sometimes it is.

    Some churches and preachers intentionally “bash” singlehood and adults who are childless or childfree (such as Southern Baptist (Link) Al Mohler, or (Link): this church in Raleigh).

    However, the un-intentional put downs and un-intended insults can be almost as hurtful. Most often, married Christian mothers, the instant they learn you are over 30, never married and have no children, lose all interest in getting to know you further.

    Some of these married mothers act instantly uncomfortable and awkward around you once they find out you are still single and childless… you are treated like an alien from Mars, rather than a fellow human being. It’s hurtful, awkward, and is one reason of many I no longer attend church.

    Churches constantly host Mother’s Day ceremonies or do things like monthly invite all new mothers foreward to pray for their newborns, but when is the last time you saw a preacher call all never-married women forward to pray for them, or to cheer on their accomplishments, such as buying a house alone, getting a work promotion, getting a college degree? Yeah, never. Only motherhood is viewed as a significant “accomplishment” for women in churches.

    (By the way, I do not hate motherhood, and I am not opposed to women being mothers: I am only opposed to how adult single women, the infertile, childless, and child free are excluded, insulted or marginalized by so many Christian churches, denominations, and media.)

    Here’s the article:

    (Link): Sorry, but being a mother is not the most important job in the world

      18 November 2013

    It’s time to drop the slogan. It encourages mothers to stay socially and financially hobbled, it alienates fathers and discourages other significant relationships between children and adults

    Being a mother is not the most important job in the world. There, I said it. Nor is it the toughest job, despite what the 92% of people polled in Parents Magazine reckon.

    For any woman who uses that line, consider this: if this is meant to exalt motherhood, then why is the line always used to sell toilet cleaner? And if being a mother is that important, why aren’t all the highly paid men with stellar careers not devoting their lives to raising children? After all, I never hear “being a father is the most important job in the world”.

    The deification of mothers not only delegitimises the relationship fathers, neighbours, friends, grandparents, teachers and carers have with children, it also diminishes the immense worth and value of these relationships. How do gay dads feel about this line, I wonder? Or the single dads, stepdads or granddads? No matter how devoted and hard working you are, fellas, you’ll always be second best.

    I’m also confused as to what makes you a mother. Is it the actual birth? Or is a “mother” simply a term to describe an expectation to care for children without payment? Is this empty slogan used to compensate women for gouging holes from potential careers by spending years out of the workplace without recognition?

    Enabling this dogma devalues the unpaid labor of rearing children as much as it strategically devalues women’s worth at work. If being a mother were a job there’d be a selection process, pay, holidays, a superior to report to, performance assessments, Friday drinks, and you could resign from your job and get another one because you didn’t like the people you were working with. It’s not a vocation either – being a mother is a relationship.

    Even if it were a job, there is no way being a professional mother could be the hardest when compared to working 16 hours a day in a clothing factory in Bangladesh, making bricks in an Indian kiln, or being a Chinese miner. Nor could it ever be considered the most important job in comparison with a surgeon who saves lives, anyone running a nation, or a judge deciding on people’s destiny.

    ~ Read the rest here ~
    ———————–
    Related posts this blog

    (Link): Parenthood Does Not Make People More Loving Mature Godly Ethical Caring or Responsible (One Stop Thread)

    (Link): Never Married Christians Over Age 35 who are childless Are More Ignored Than Divorced or Infertile People or Single Parents

    (Link):  Facebook’s motherhood challenge makes me want to punch my computer screen by F. Everett

    (Link): Family as “The” Backbone of Society? – It’s Not In The Bible

    (Link): The Irrelevancy To Single or Childless or Childfree Christian Women of Biblical Gender Complementarian Roles / Biblical Womanhood Teachings

    (Link): Mother’s Day Ain’t A Happy Holiday For Some

    (Link): Why all the articles about being Child Free? On Being Childfree or Childless – as a Conservative / Right Wing / Christian

    (Link): Widows and Childless and Childfree Have Better Well Being Than Married Couples and Parents says new study

    (Link): Bearden: Staying childless right decision for many women

    (Link):  Facebook’s motherhood challenge makes me want to punch my computer screen by F. Everett

    (Link): Christian Patriarchy Group: God Demands You Marry and Have Babies to Defeat Paganism and Satan. Singles and the Childless Worthless (in this worldview).

    (Link): Don’t Judge Me, I’m Childless (from Today’s Christian Woman)

    (Link): Southern Baptist’s New Sexist “Biblical Woman” Site – Attitudes in Total Face Palm of a Site One Reason Among Many This Unmarried and Childless Woman Is Saying Toodle-Oo to Christianity

    (Link): Is The Church Failing Childless Women? by Diane Paddison

    (Link): 26, Unmarried, and Childless – by A. Mast

    (Link): Idiot Author Thinks Childless and Childfree Should Pay Higher Taxes to Subsidize Parents

    Married Father Wants Frequent Breaks From Being Married Father – If Family is Backbone of Society As Christians Teach….

    Married Father Wants Frequent Breaks From Being Married Father – (If Family is Backbone of Society As Christians Teach….)

    So this married guy who has two or three kids writes to advice columnist Ann Landers or Dear Abby or whatever saying he and his wife get into weekly or monthly arguments.

    He wants to be able to go on weekly outings overnight with his male buddies with no wife and no kids, for extended poker games or whatever.

    He wants to take two wife-less and two kid-less week long trips per year. This has has wife hopping mad.

    You have conservative Christians constantly bleating how “family is the backbone of culture,” and how supposedly, marriage and parenthood automatically mature a person or bestow godliness on a person.

    Obviously none of this nonsense is true, when you have grown men who are married with a kid or two who want to spend time away from the family, to run off and be with their beer- drinking, football watching, frat buddies. Give me a break.

    This man obviously does not consider what he is doing – marriage and fatherhood – as being anything important to culture or society.

    He does not care an iota if his family is a so-called “building block” of culture, as evangelicals, Reformed, fundamentalists, and Baptists so often say on their blogs, books, sermons, and television and radio shows.

    He cares more about having his weekend, beer drinking, fun times escapades with his male buddies than he does in being a husband or daddy. So Christians can take their “looking down their nose” at childless adults and never-married adults and stick it where the sun don’t shine.

    Here’s his letter.

    Ask Amy: Dad demands monthly break from family

      By AMY DICKINSON

      Dear Amy:
      My wife and I have an ongoing dispute that threatens our family, which includes two young children, ages 2 and 5.

      I have a desire to visit my guy friends with overnight visits once a month and occasional longer trips with my brothers or guy friends about once every two years, to go skiing, camping, to the beach, etc.

      This seems to be too much for my wife, who makes a big stink. She feels I should only care about family and never leave her alone to take care of the kids.

      I’ve offered to have my mom watch the kids while I’m gone, but that’s not good enough. Also, I beg her to take similar trips with her friends or her sister while I watch the kids. She declines or says she can’t work it out.

      She has given in to my demands occasionally, but it is only after lengthy arguments.

      Do you think I am selfish or unjustified in my request?
      — Conflicted in South Carolina

      Dear Conflicted:
      The answer to your question is “yes” and “yes.” A monthly overnight with a biennial trip with the guys for a longer duration (conveniently unspecified) is too much.

      It might not be too much for some families, but it is too much for yours.

      I know this because you characterize this as a “demand” that threatens your family.

      Most mothers and fathers would love to take a fun overnight break from a 2- and 5-year-old 12 (sometimes 13) times a year, but building a family together requires that parents not have one foot out the door.

      You don’t mention wanting a monthly poker night after which you roll home in the wee hours.

      You need an overnight. When you make your demand, this is what your wife hears: “I don’t enjoy being a husband and father. I must escape our family as often as possible.”

      She is trying to control you because she is afraid you will flee for an overnight and simply keep on running.

      You and your wife need a night or two together away from the kids to reconnect as a couple and figure out a compromise that sounds less like a demand. You should plan this.

    ———————-
    Related posts this blog:

    (Link): Family as “The” Backbone of Society? – It’s Not In The Bible

    (Link): Do Married Couples Slight Their Family Members as Well as Their Friends? / “Greedy Marriages”

    (Link): How Can Conservatives and Christians Keep Teaching Family is Backbone of Society when there are so many dysfunctional or abusive familes

    (Link): Misuse of Terms Such As “Traditional Families” by Christians – Re: Kirk Cameron, Homosexual Marriage, and the 2014 Grammys

    (Link): The Term “Family Values” And Its Use By Christians – Vis A Vis story: Grandma Gives Teen Granddaughter a Vibrator

    Mothers Who Steal Handicapped Parking Spots from Disabled Woman and Act Rude When Confronted – Motherhood does not make women more loving, nurturing, godly, or mature

    Mothers Who Steal Handicapped Parking Spots from Disabled Woman and Act Rude When Confronted – Motherhood does not make women more loving, nurturing, godly, or mature

    (Link): Dear Amy Letter: “Disabled parker deserves her due”

    Or,
    “When women who are mothers act like total, entitled, bitches.”

    This is another example that counters the well-worn conservative (and yes, I’m a conservative myself, but one who does not agree with the conservative tendency to worship motherhood) and Christian fables that motherhood makes women more nurturing, caring, godly, and selfless than women who are not mothers.

    The letter:

      DEAR AMY:

      I have a myriad of health problems. The long and short of it is that I am often in pain and have difficulty walking, sitting and standing. That said, I do not use a wheelchair yet, and while I walk slowly, I don’t always limp.

      However, at my newborn’s day care center, none of this matters. There are only two handicap spaces, and they are almost always taken by healthy moms who resent being asked to move to other spaces for someone who “obviously isn’t disabled.”

      I try being polite, but some of the moms are incredibly rude. One even threatened me after I asked her to move her SUV. (She was parked across both spaces with the motor off and talking on the phone.)

      Honestly, I wouldn’t have asked if there were any spaces within range or even if they got in and out quickly. When there are no spaces in the lot, I have to park illegally in front of the building and block the moms who parked illegally to begin with. Guess who they think is the jerk in that scenario?

      I have asked the head of the center to please post a sign reminding parents that they shouldn’t take up the disabled spots but she won’t do it. I feel awful about causing trouble.

      Should I just suck up the pain and park far away, or in some cases, wait 10 minutes for a space? Finding another day care isn’t an option.
      — Disabled and Distressed

    ————————–
    Related posts, this blog:

    (Link): Parenthood Does Not Make People More Loving Mature Godly Ethical Caring or Responsible (One Stop Thread)

    (Link): Greedy, Entitled Mother Expects Her Childless Friend to Buy Daughter Computer, DVD Player, or Digital Tablet

    (Link): Totally Obnoxious Parent: Childless Couple Who Donates to Childrens Charities Lambasted by Snotty Adult Sister for Not Showering Her Kids with Christmas Presents – Parents Who Discriminate Against the Childless or Childfree

    (Link): Cultural Discrimination Against Childless and Childfree Women – and link to an editorial by a Childless Woman

    (Link): Kid-Friendly Policies Don’t Help Singles – Work and Job Discrimination Against Singles Unmarried Childless Childfree

    Greedy, Entitled Mother Expects Her Childless Friend to Buy Daughter Computer, DVD Player, or Digital Tablet

    Greedy, Entitled Mother Expects Her Childless Friend to Buy Daughter Computer, DVD Player, or Digital Tablet

    This is from “Miss Manners”:

      DEAR MISS MANNERS:
      My best friend e-mailed this Christmas wish list on behalf of her 12-year-old daughter to her friends (no family members):

      ‘’Greetings all. Zoe has asked me to e-mail you her Christmas list. We’re going to my parents’/grandmother’s for Christmas, so if you need the address to ship anything there, please let me know.”

      The list included a particular laptop, (flat screen) TV and DVD player, money/credit gift card, certain video games, a new bike (“she outgrew her old one”), gift cards (naming a number of stores), a tablet and so on.

      Then, “Look forward to talking to you all soon.”

      Am I wrong for feeling accosted? She is constantly sending out appeals for money or gifts. I wouldn’t have minded a wish list that was actually reasonable, but my friend constantly makes remarks like, “You don’t have any children, so you should have plenty of disposable income.”

      How do I respond? Normally, I would ignore it, but I feel like this is just too egregious and something needs to be said because her e-mails/requests become more outrageous with each round.

    Part of me almost wishes I had a friend like this, so the moment they try this on me, I can call them on the phone, say, “Hey I got your e mail” and then proceed to laugh and laugh and laugh and laugh and laugh before slamming the phone down, and maybe later sending her an email asking her to buy me a porsche, mansion, and a trip to Paris, France.

    Unfreaking believable how incredibly snotty and entitled some parents are, especially towards the childless and childfree.

    Totally Obnoxious Parent: Childless Couple Who Donates to Childrens Charities Lambasted by Snotty Adult Sister for Not Showering Her Kids with Christmas Presents – Parents Who Discriminate Against the Childless or Childfree

    Childless Couple Who Donates to Childrens Charities Lambasted by Snotty Adult Sister for Not Showering Her Kids with Christmas Presents – Parents Who Discriminate Against the Childless

    Oh my dog. The level of snottiness from this bratty adult parent. Amazing.

    Letter to advice columnist Carolyn Hax (I have not yet read Hax’s reponse; I am keeping my fingers crossed Hax tells her to take her anti childless attitudes and shove them up her ass):

      [Dear] Carolyn:
      I’m pretty annoyed and appalled at my brother, “Ted,” and his wife, “Lisa,” regarding Christmas and I’m wondering how to approach them.

      On our side of the family there are four siblings (including Ted) and five nieces and nephews. Three years ago we decided that the Christmas gift exchange had gotten to be too much, so we agreed that gifts among the siblings and grandparents would only be given to the children. It worked beautifully and everyone had a blast (we thought) watching the kids with their toys.

      Last week, Ted informed me that he and Lisa are bowing out of the afternoon gift exchange and will only show for dinner in the evening because, as the only childless couple, they’re “not really a part of it.” Meaning, because they don’t get any presents they’re not going to give any!

      I was shocked at such stinginess considering that, even though none of us is hurting for money, they’re by far the wealthiest.

      It hurts even more considering the fact that they provide a veritable waterfall of presents for Lisa’s goddaughter, and every year they buy a ton of toys for the “giving tree” at their church!

      My sister and I don’t know how to explain to our kids that their uncle and aunt don’t think enough of them to buy them a little Christmas present. As the oldest, I’ve been elected to talk to Ted about this and I’m looking for help in presenting to Ted how bad this makes him look to the rest of the family and how to get him to reconsider.
      Scrooge’s Sibling

    😯 Why in the fuck (don’t be shocked by the naughty language, you were forewarned weeks ago, LINK) should a childless couple be expected to buy presents for children, for anyone’s children?

    (Rhetorical. My answer is they should not be expected to. Not buying some rugs rats some gifts, not even for nephews and nieces, does not make them selfish, stingy Big Meanies.)

    The mother (or “Moo,” as Child Free would refer to her) who wrote this letter to Hax certainly has a huge entitlement mentality.

    In case you are curious, here is part of Hax’s reply to The Bitch:

      But it’s neither the only possibility nor a persuasive one to me. If Ted and Lisa have long been the non-parents at child-centric family events, then their choice might be a coping mechanism for them, not a slap to your kids — especially if they want to be parents but keep hitting obstacles.

      Maybe, too, they never enjoyed the kid frenzy and prefer seeing their nieces and nephews one family at a time. Even some parents would opt out of child-centric events if they could.

      … Consider this one also: With four siblings and grandparents, plural, among the adults, all affluent, and with only five kids receiving gifts, and with a family precedent of gift-giving run amok, it’s not hard for me to whomp up a mental image of Christmas day excess.

      … Most of all, I’d wonder why you approached me solely to extract gifts, and not to understand my reasoning and find another way to include me. So I’ll ask you: Why? Don’t say boo to Ted until you fill in that blank.

    And in today’s column to Amy, some woman who’s been married for 14 years says she found out her husband (whom she has two kids with) has been cheating on her. Oh yes, marriage (and being a parent) magically transforms people into godly saints! 🙄
    ——————–
    Related posts:

    (Link): Cultural Discrimination Against Childless and Childfree Women – and link to an editorial by a Childless Woman

    (Link): Why all the articles about being Child Free? On Being Childfree or Childless – as a Conservative / Right Wing / Christian

    (Link): Prejudiced Writer Stupidly Blames Slutty Halloween Costumes and Societal Ills on Childless the Childfree, and Unmarried Adults – but Married people and parents are not perfect either

    (Link): The Fruitful Callings of the Childless By Choice (editorial)