Ask E. Jean: My Husband Will Not Shower

Ask E. Jean: My Husband Will Not Shower

So much for the conservative and Christian myth that marriage makes people more mature, godly, and responsible.

(Link): Ask E. Jean: My Husband Will Not Shower

How do I get the guy to be more into hygiene? I’ve tried everything!

Continue reading “Ask E. Jean: My Husband Will Not Shower”

Married People Who Use Their Spouse’s Disease or Disability to Excuse Their Adultery – an article by M. Del Russo

Married People Who Use Their Spouse’s Disease or Disability to Excuse Their Adultery – an article by M. Del Russo

I have never had sex outside of marriage, one reason of several is that the Bible says that sex is intended for a man married to a woman – anything outside of marriage is fornication and is considered sin. I am now past the age of 45.

If I can maintain celibacy this long, so too can anyone else, including these people who are in marriages where their spouse is debilitated in some manner, through a physical or mental health issue.

It’s a matter of personal conviction and self control. I do not have some sort of special gifting from God that removes libido. I am not asexual.

So, do I excuse or look on with compassion at these women or men in this article who started affairs with other adults when their own spouses became ill? No, I do not. Going without sex or romance will not kill a person, and you made a vow to your partner.

As for the woman quoted below who says those in her position don’t want to burden their sick spouse with demands for sex – that is all polite and well and good, but has she never heard of masturbation? Why are so many married people under the assumption that the only form of sexual activity is “penis in the vagina”?

(Link): These women care for their ailing husbands. They say dating other men is how they take care of themselves.

Excerpts:

…But the trio’s situation scratches at a question: How do couples sustain relationships and navigate intimacy when disease or disability strikes?

Christina — who asked to be identified by her first name because of privacy concerns — says her marriage was very happy and she loves her spouse deeply, but now that his disease has progressed, she no longer recognizes the person he’s become.

Continue reading “Married People Who Use Their Spouse’s Disease or Disability to Excuse Their Adultery – an article by M. Del Russo”

‘My marriage is damaged as I can’t maintain an erection – even for a minute’

‘My marriage is damaged as I can’t maintain an erection – even for a minute’

What about that Christian promise that marital sex is always hot and satisfying? I guess that is just a bunch of bunk.

So, this married couple has never heard of oral sex?

(Link): ‘My marriage is damaged as I can’t maintain an erection – even for a minute’

DEAR DEIDRE: MY marriage is damaged as I can’t maintain an erection – even for a minute.

It has nearly always been a problem for me, although we have managed to have two little girls.

My wife is 34 and I’m 36. Just recently it has become a whole lot worse.

Continue reading “‘My marriage is damaged as I can’t maintain an erection – even for a minute’”

Widow Whose Husband Died Sues Over ‘Loss of Sex’

Widow Whose Husband Died Sues Over ‘Loss of Sex’

So, being married does not, contra conservative and Christian propaganda I heard often while growing up, guarantee an end to loneliness (if your spouse dies), and it does not guarantee hot, steady sex.

(Link): Woman whose husband died sues for £650k over ‘loss of SEX’

Jamie Finnegan was left brain-damaged and passed away in 2018 after a procedure at Brisbane Hospital went wrong six years ago

By Jenny Awford

THE widow of a husband who died after a botched medical treatment is suing the Australian government for £650,000 over a loss of sex.

Continue reading “Widow Whose Husband Died Sues Over ‘Loss of Sex’”

My Thoughts Regarding the Editorial: Sex & The Single Pastor by Rod Dreher

My Thoughts Regarding the Editorial: Sex & The Single Pastor by Rod Dreher

The following editorial by Rod Dreher is about a liberal Luthern preacher named Nadia Bolz Weber who recently had a bunch of women’s “sexual purity rings” melted down to have an artist form them into the shape of a vagina.

Bolz Weber also released a new book about sex called “Shameless.” It’s an anti-Purity Culture book.

The author of this essay, Dreher, refers readers of his piece to (Link): this page (“The Luthern Pastor Calling For a Sexual Revolution”) at the New Yorker about Bolz Weber.

I was a devout Christian for many years, and that is one reason among a few as to why I remain a virgin past the age of 45.

That’s right, I’ve never had sex – because I was waiting until I got married to have sex, but I never found the right guy to marry.

I have spent a few years blogging here pointing out how nobody but nobody respects adult virginity or celibacy.

Many conservatives and Christians mock and insult adult celibacy and virginity, not just “sex positive” feminists or liberals.

As a matter of fact, a lot of Christians (and secular conservatives) view marriage to be the norm, and as something that can “fix” society, so they shame or insult anyone who remains single past the page of 30, whether that singleness is due to choice or circumstance. (I have examples of this sort of thing in older posts on this blog.)

Continue reading “My Thoughts Regarding the Editorial: Sex & The Single Pastor by Rod Dreher”

‘I Almost Drove My Car Off A Bridge Because Of The Strain of Having a Family’

‘I Almost Drove My Car Off A Bridge Because Of The Strain of Having a Family’

I’m not exactly anti-marriage or anti-family, but.

However. I am tired of how other conservatives or how 99% of Christians “hype” marriage, children, and “the family” to the point they act as though everyone should get married and have a kid, and if you do not, they suggest or state point blank, that you have failed culture and society, and you’re a big Loser. Christians especially behave as though getting married and having a kid is a commandment from God (it is not).

Being married and being a mother did not bring happiness to this lady.

And notice how this lady says that she and her husband didn’t have sex for a year.

I bring that up, because one teaching I heard or saw a lot in Christian sermons or books when I was a kid growing up is that if one remains a virgin until marriage, that God will reward you and your spouse with regular, “mind blowing” sex. The reality is, a person can remain chaste but then end up having lousy sex in marriage, or none at all.

(Link): BABY BLUES – We rowed [argued] and hadn’t had sex for a year due to the strain of starting a family… I almost drove my car off a bridge

January 2019

Aimee and Davin Bradley, both 35, were at each other’s throats for the first three years of their daughter’s life

By Hayley Richardson

HAVING a baby can feel like the icing on the cake for some couples but for others the strain of starting a family can push them to breaking point.

Aimee and Davin Bradley, both 35, were at each other’s throats for the first three years of their daughter Autumn’s life and didn’t have sex for a year.

Continue reading “‘I Almost Drove My Car Off A Bridge Because Of The Strain of Having a Family’”

Woman Arrested AGAIN for Battering Man who Declined to Have Sex with Her…

Woman arrested AGAIN for battering man who declined to have sex with her…

It’s usually men who react violently to sexual rebuffs or dating rejection, but in this case it’s a woman.

(Link): Woman arrested AGAIN for battering man who declined to have sex with her… 

Second time Floridian, 31, busted after sex advances were spurned

November 2018

NOVEMBER 26–A Florida Woman battered her boyfriend after he “said no and went back to bed” after she “grabbed his genitals wanting to have sex” on Thanksgiving night, cops say.

Rebecca Lynn Phelps, 31, was arrested for domestic battery following a confrontation in the Tampa-area home she shares with the victim and the couple’s child.

Continue reading “Woman Arrested AGAIN for Battering Man who Declined to Have Sex with Her…”

‘We’re In Love But We Never Have Sex’

(Link): ‘We’re in love but never have sex’

By Claire Williams

Some 18% of respondents under the age of 30 have had sex fewer than 10 times in the past year, a survey of 2,000 people on websites Mumsnet and Gransnet has found. Among all ages, the figure was 29%. We meet three couples who, while madly in love, fall into this category.

“Our lack of sex life at the moment is down to me,” Amanda, 35, tells the BBC’s Victoria Derbyshire programme.

“I’m so tired all the time because my job is full on and it’s full on at home. It’s like my libido is tired.”

Continue reading “‘We’re In Love But We Never Have Sex’”

Mary the Married Christian Says She’s Been in Sexless Marriage for 17 Years

Mary The Married Christian Says She’s Been in Sexless Marriage for 17 Years

The woman’s letter to Pat Robertson of The 700 Club show is towards the end (video embedded at bottom of this post) – it’s like the 2nd letter below.

Mary says her marriage has been sexless for 17 years now. She says her husband could care less about sex. She wants to know if this is normal or not.

Which is rather funny, since most Christians tell people if they just stay sexually pure until they marry that once they marry, their married sex life will be great, hot, regular, and fireworks will go off.

Continue reading “Mary the Married Christian Says She’s Been in Sexless Marriage for 17 Years”

My Husband Caught Me Masturbating, and It Led to Our Divorce by Jane Doe

My Husband Caught Me Masturbating, and It Led to Our Divorce by Jane Doe

And some Christians, especially in their dating or martial advice books, would have you believe that if you just wait until marriage to have sex, that you’ll always have great, regular sex. Not so…

(Link):  My Husband Caught Me Masturbating, and It Led to Our Divorce by Jane Doe

Excerpts:

as told to CAYLIN HARRIS

Sure, it’s awkward being walked in on. But how my husband responded was what shocked me the most.

… Over time, though, our sex life changed. And by that I mean it became nonexistent. What once was us having sex at least a few times a week turned into one or two times a month, if I was lucky.

He grew more emotionally distant and had trouble getting aroused, and while I knew he was dealing with a lot of financial stress at work (and I was bringing in less money due to my job switch), he never wanted to have a conversation with me, or even see a doctor.

Continue reading “My Husband Caught Me Masturbating, and It Led to Our Divorce by Jane Doe”

Why Doesn’t Your Husband Want to Have Sex? by E. Bernstein

Why Doesn’t Your Husband Want to Have Sex? by E. Bernstein

(Link): Why Doesn’t Your Husband Want to Have Sex?

Excerpts:

May 12, 2018

Despite the conventional wisdom, sometimes it’s the man who loses sexual desire

Contrary to conventional wisdom, sometimes it’s men who first lose sexual desire in a long-term relationship, a new study finds.

Men’s desire for sex can be as tricky as women’s, according to researchers at the University of Kentucky.

Men often lose interest when they feel insecure, when they worry they are losing autonomy in a relationship, or when physical changes cause embarrassment. Pressure to be the initiator compounds the stress.

Continue reading “Why Doesn’t Your Husband Want to Have Sex? by E. Bernstein”

Thoughts on the NRO Essay “Advice For Incels” by Kevin D. Williamson

Thoughts on the NRO Essay “Advice For Incels” by Kevin D. Williamson

About me and this blog:

If you are new to my blog: I have been a conservative my entire life. I’ve never voted Democrat. I was a Republican until a few years ago. I am no longer in any political party.

I sometimes critique secular, left wing feminists on my blog (such as but not limited to (Link): this post and (Link): this one), but there are times when I believe other conservatives get feminists wrong, and feminists are actually correct on some issues.

I was brought up in a traditional values, conservative, Christian family where my parents brought me to Southern Baptist churches as I was growing up, where I was taught to believe in gender complementarianism, which I did for many years, until I finally realized how (Link): wrong and sexist complementarianism is.

Because I grew up as a complementarian, I am quite familiar with what they think and why they think as they do.

My current religious beliefs are somewhat “up in the air,” as I am waffling between being agnostic, (or a deist), and the Christian faith. (Note: I am not an atheist.)

I am by no means anti- Nuclear Family, anti- motherhood, or anti- marriage, though I do posit that many to most conservatives – especially the religious ones – have gone to un-biblical lengths and have turned the Nuclear Family, marriage, natalism, and motherhood and fatherhood into idols which is wrong of them.

— end introduction to me and this blog —

I saw a link to this essay go through my Twitter feed today:

(Link): Advice for Incels by Kevin D. Williamson

On one level, this essay – “Advice for Incels” was okay.

However, I think that while the guy who wrote it has his heart in the right place, I think he gets a lot of things wrong and is naive about how Baptist and conservative Protestant and evangelical churches are for adult singles.

I’ve spent the last several years on this blog covering these topics – I’d encourage Williamson and anyone who read his NRO piece to read the books  (Link): “Singled Out” by Field and Colon and  “Quitting Church” by Christian author Julia Duin for even more information.

Continue reading “Thoughts on the NRO Essay “Advice For Incels” by Kevin D. Williamson”