Can Someone Really Be a ‘Born-Again Virgin?’ by L. Borreli

Can someone really be a ‘born-again virgin?’ by L. Borreli

I do not support the term or concept of “born again virginity” as I’ve explained in a few previous posts, such as (Link): this one, so I shall not belabor that point here.

(Link): Can Someone Really Be a ‘Born-Again Virgin?’ by L. Borreli via Medical Daily

Excerpts:

  • Is it really possible to become a “born-again virgin” through spiritual and surgical routes?
  • The Social Construct of Virginity
  • The (Link): social construct of virginity will most likely not disappear. People define virginity by what it means to them and what works in accordance to their morals and values. However, the most common definition of virginity for heterosexual women is whether they have had penile-vaginal intercourse.
  • According to (Link): The Kinsey Institute: “Losing one’s virginity is a physical act, whether or not a woman notices any blood from her vagina. The reason why some women bleed when they first have sex is because a thin layer of tissue called the hymen covers part of a woman’s vaginal entrance.”
  • It is believed when a woman has sex, the hymen tears and she may begin to bleed a bit. However, some women don’t have much of this tissue to begin with, or have tissue that has been torn from using tampons, from masturbation, or from being fingered by a partner. This is why looking for blood on the sheet or going to the doctor is a poor way of determining whether or not a woman is a virgin.
  • Born-Again Virgin: What Is It?
  • According to Dictionary.com:
  • “Revirginzation is the process of a sexually active person attempting to regain virgin status by abstaining from sexual relations, esp. during the time just before marriage; also called secondary virginity, revirgination.”
  • UrbanDictionary defines being a born-again virgin like this:
  • “More than a year between sexual relations, with anyone else.”
  • But, how did this label come to be?
  • The concept of born-again virginity started to be embraced in the 1990s and early 2000s as abstinence education took root in public schools.

Continue reading “Can Someone Really Be a ‘Born-Again Virgin?’ by L. Borreli”

Viral Virgin Brelyn Bowman Talks Purity Backlash From Christians, New Book ‘No Ring, No Ting’ (Interview)

Viral Virgin Brelyn Bowman Talks Purity Backlash From Christians, New Book ‘No Ring, No Ting’ (Interview) 

I agree that those Christians (or ex Christians) who are opposed to sexual purity (virginity) lifestyles or teachings have gone overboard with it – as have some secular liberals.

Women (or men) who, of their own freewill, choose to abstain sexually are mocked or ridiculed for abstaining. (I have links with examples to this under the “Related Posts” section at the end of this post).

I think it’s very hypocritical for people to champion all sexual behaviors or choices of women EXCEPT FOR staying a virgin until marriage. Celebrity women can yak all day long about their sexual conquests on Twitter or in interviews, and nobody raises a fuss – but the moment a woman makes public that she’s waiting until marriage (or a serious relationship) to have sex, she will be faced with a lot of ridicule and criticism. Even by so-called feminists, who claim to respect all sexual choices of women.

I have blogged about this woman previously (Link): here.

(Link): Viral Virgin Brelyn Bowman Talks Purity Backlash From Christians, New Book ‘No Ring, No Ting’ (Interview) by C. Thomasos – March 8, 2016

  • Brelyn Bowman says she wasn’t surprised that people in the secular world disapproved of her posting a gynecologist’s purity certificate on social media after her wedding day last year. But she was shocked by the backlash that came from Christians.
  • The 23-year-old wife of gospel singer Tim Bowman Jr. says she made the decision to honor God by abstaining from sex until her wedding day. Soon after she proudly announced to the world on Instagram that she had remained a virgin until her wedding day by showing the certificate she presented to her father, a number of Christians responded in anger.
  • Bowman told The Christian Post that she was mostly surprised that many of those who left negative comments about her decision to show her father the results of her gynocological exam that revealed she was still a virgin before her wedding day identified as Christians.
  • “That’s what I couldn’t understand. So it was kind of like, why do we, as Christians, bash one another instead of protect one another and spread the message of God to those who may not understand?” she questioned.
  • “It’s OK for a girl who gets pregnant out of wedlock to say ‘OK, I’m pregnant’ and we celebrate the baby. But it’s not OK to say ‘Hey, I’m a virgin.'” she asserted. “Maybe the certificate wasn’t right, but neither was her getting pregnant. We still celebrate the baby.”

Continue reading “Viral Virgin Brelyn Bowman Talks Purity Backlash From Christians, New Book ‘No Ring, No Ting’ (Interview)”

Hypocrisy Alert: (Anti Virginity Proponent) Russell Moore to Pastors: Don’t Do Wedding Ceremonies for Couples Living in Sin

Hypocrisy Alert: (Anti Virginity Proponent) Russell Moore to Pastors: Don’t Do Wedding Ceremonies for Couples Living in Sin

This is the same Moore who (Link): attacks and ridicules adult Christian virgins for being virgins until marriage.

 So this doofus  has a hella lot of nerve lecturing Christian preachers about not performing Christians who are living in sexual sin.

Moore: you do not honor Christian adults who are Virgins who are waiting ’til marriage to have sex, (which is a very basic Christian sexual ethic), so how do you square away bad-mouthing and shaming Christian couples who may be “shacking up?”

You actually have, in the past, criticized and shamed singles who are living sexually pure life styles. You are being absolutely hypocritical here:

(Link): Russell Moore to Pastors: Don’t Do Wedding Ceremonies for Couples Living in Sin by S. Smith

Excerpts:

  • Leading Southern Baptist ethicist Russell Moore is encouraging pastors not to perform wedding ceremonies for couples who are not Christians and those who are living in sin simply because members of their families belong to their church or their congregation is pressuring them to do so.
  • Moore, who is the president of the Southern Baptist Convention’s Ethics & Religious Liberty Commission, spoke at a conference on “The Church and Sexuality” that was held at the First Baptist Church in Montgomery, Alabama, by the state’s Baptist and Southern Baptist leaders on Monday.
  • (Link): Alabama.com reports that Moore told the crowd of about 500 people that pastors cannot hold non believers and those already living in sin accountable to their wedding vows if they are already not living their lives by God’s design.
  • “You cannot marry anyone except believers and people under the authority of Jesus Christ,” Moore explained. “Unbelievers, you cannot hold accountable to their vows.”

Continue reading “Hypocrisy Alert: (Anti Virginity Proponent) Russell Moore to Pastors: Don’t Do Wedding Ceremonies for Couples Living in Sin”

A Book Called “Prude” That Uses the Term “Neo Virgin”

A Book Called “Prude” That Uses the Term “Neo Virgin”

An author by the name of Carrie Lloyd was on Christian TV program The 700 Club today. She wrote a book called “Prude” about her choice to remain celibate after having been very sexually active while in her 20s. I think she also used the term “Neo Virgin” on the show and maybe in her book.

I have not read her book, I only saw her interview on the show today.

She was raised in a Christian household, but later drifted away from the Christian faith and then came back to the faith later.

I support her choice to remain celibate until marriage. I don’t have a problem there. However, I have to admit to not being fond of terms such as “Neo Virgin.”

Either you are a virgin or you are not one. I’m over 40 years of age and have never had sexual intercourse, not even with my ex fiance, because I was wanting to wait until marriage to have sex.

I find terms such as “Neo Virgin” or other Christian phrases such as “Born Again Virgin” or “Spiritual Virgin” to be a little demeaning to actual, honest to God virgins such as myself. Such terms dilute the real meaning of, or state of being, a virgin.

I also find it ironic that Christian culture continues to uphold fornicators as experts in how to resist sexual temptation or how to go about sexual purity and celibacy, rather than publish books by honest- to- God virgins who are past the age of 30 or older who are still maintaining their virginity.

Here is a link to a page that discusses Ms. Lloyd’s story and book:

(Link): Making Healthy Relationship Choices in an Unhealthy World

Excerpts:

  • ….Growing up, Carrie was teased about her stance on abstinence.  By the time she entered high school, she was infamous with the boys at the neighboring school as one of the last remaining virgins.  Once her photo was pinned to the school notice board.  She was the target to see which boy could get her to lose her virginity.  Her peers didn’t feel the same way she did.  “No one wanted to save it for one person,” says Carrie.  “This subtle prejudice toward my choices made me more determined to hold out.”
  • …. Meanwhile, women were fighting for someone to love them.  “I call this the curse of Eve,” says Carrie.  The curse says, “Everything will be redeemed once I have found my husband,” and that a woman will be happier having found her purpose.
  • THE DECADENT DAYS
  • Carrie was 18 when her father underwent a serious heart operation so severe it almost killed him and left him with some brain damage.  In his effort to deal with his pain, Carrie’s dad began to drink.  “Seeing my preacher papa enter into substance abuse caused me to question everything he taught,” says Carrie.  “What happened to relying on God?”
  • When she was 23, Carrie’s dad passed away.  One night Carried decided to walk away from God.  She was mad at God and men and started on the path of hurting others.  Several years later, Carrie had several physical relationships and reached the lowest point of her life since her father died.  She prayed to God and heard an inaudible voice that said, I’ve been here all along.  Carrie realized that God had never left her.

According to the rest of the article, and from what I remember from the TV interview, when she decided at some stage in her late 20s (or her 30s?) to remain abstinent, some of the men she dated broke up with her. One guy did stay with her for two years and respected her “no sex until I marry” belief, but the relationship ended, though not due to the celibate aspect.

Here is a page about her book:

(Link):  Prude: Misconceptions Of A Neo-Virgin

  • Overview
  • “SEX. LOVE. VIRGINITY? In the dating game, the V-word has become as strange and complicated as the L-word, with purity as outdated as pay phones.
  • What is an ex-athiest, post-porn addict, unorthodox Christian girl to do these days?
  • How can she create boundaries without scaring off every available guy? Is purity even possible without being puritanical? In this candid, humorous account of the true-life trials of Christian dating, the author shares the wisdom she’s gleaned in her quest for love in a modern world.
  • She guides with grace and honesty through the often hush-hush topics of sex, porn, shame, female competition, misconceptions about purity, and those dreaded “waiting till marriage: conversations.

————————–

Related Posts:

(Link):  Churches Would Rather Hear From Ex Porn Stars Than Adult Celibates or Virgins – Church Invites Ex Porn Star to be Guest Speaker

 (Link):   Why are young feminists so clueless about sex? by M. Wente

(Link): Article: Our Born-Again Virgin Bachelor – Secondary or Spiritual Virginity

(Link): Celebrity Deems Herself A Born Again Virgin And Vows to Stay Celibate “For A Year” – Oh Puh-leaze

(Link):  Woman Says She Refuses to Hook-up with Men ‘For Fun’ – Says Most Men She’s Met Are Willing to Wait

(Link):  How About Using Celibates as Role Models For Celibacy? (Oddity: Christians Holding Up Non-Virgins [Fornicators] As Being Experts or Positive Examples on Sexual Purity)

(Link):  She’s Waiting Until Marriage to Have Sex. Here’s Her Response to Those ‘Inevitable Jerks’ Who Think Her Decision Is ‘Stupid’ – by E. Kahn

(Link):  Sometimes Fornication Can Impact Another Relationship Later – One Example

(Link):  When Adult Virginity and Adult Celibacy Are Viewed As Inconvenient or As Impediments

(Link): Self Control – everyone has it, is capable of it, but most choose not to use it (New Study Says Conservatives Have Better Self Control Than Liberals)

(Link):  Hypocrisy: Secular Pundits Judge Christian Sexuality: Josh Duggar’s So-Called Vanilla Sexual Preferences Deemed Dull

(Link): False Christian Teaching: “Only A Few Are Called to Singleness and Celibacy”

(Link): Statistics Show Single Adults Now Outnumber Married Adults in the United States (2014)

(Link): The Netherworld of Singleness for Some Singles – You Want Marriage But Don’t Want to Be Disrespected or Ignored for Being Single While You’re Single

(Link):  Ever Notice That Christians Don’t Care About or Value Singleness, Unless Jesus Christ’s Singleness and Celibacy is Doubted or Called Into Question by Scholars?

(Link):  Are Single People the Lepers of Today’s Church? by Gina Dalfonzo

(Link):  No Christians and Churches Do Not Idolize Virginity and Sexual Purity – Christians Attack and Criticize Virginity Sexual Purity Celibacy / Virginity Sexual Purity Not An Idol

(Link): Secular, Left Wing Feminist Writer Marcotte on Anyone Choosing To Be a Virgin Until Marriage: “It’s a Silly Idea” – What Progressive Christians, Conservative Christians, Non Christians, and Salon’s Amanda Marcotte Gets Wrong About Christian Views on Virginity

(Link): Want To But Can’t – The One Christian Demographic Being Continually Ignored by Christians | Re: Marriage Not Happening for Hetero-sexual Christians Over the Age of 30

(Link): On ‘Late’-In-Life Virginity Loss (from The Atlantic)

(Link): Why Some People Become 30 Year Old Virgins (Article / Study)

(Link): Virginity Lost, Experience Gained (article with information from study about virginity)

(Link): Some Atheists Are Just As Ignorant About Adult Singleness and Celibacy as Progressive Christians, Secular Feminists, and Protestant Evangelical or Conservative Christians

(Link): Celebrities who waited until marriage to have sex (list 2)

(Link): Living Myths About Virginity – article from The Atlantic

(Link): I Shouldn’t Need An Excuse To Be A Virgin – (Secular Editorial Defends Virginity – More Rare Than a Unicorn Sighting)

(Link): Virgins and Celibates are Sexual – Not Asexual and Androgynous – You don’t have to have sex to possess sexuality

(Link): Asexuality and Asexuals

(Link):  Meagan Good Tells Single Women Why They Should Stop Having Sex

(Link):  Preacher: ‘They Will Know We Are Christians By Our Hot SEX Lives’ – and once more, never-married celibate adults and their experiences, wisdom, and input are ignored

(Link):  Want To Grow Your Church? Advertise Sex (Story via A Little Leaven Blog)

(Link):  The Decisive Marriage – Study Says Couples Who Don’t Have Pre-Marital Sex, or Not Much or Not Many Sexual Partners Pre-Marriage, Have Better Quality or Longer Lasting Marriages

(Link): Weak Argument Against Celibacy / Virginity / Sexual Purity by the Anti Sexual Purity Gestapo – Sexual Compatibility or Incompatibility – (i.e., Taking Human Beings For Test Spins – Humans As Sexual Commodities) (Part 2)

(Link):   Stop Pretending Sex Never Hurts, By D.C. McAllister

(Link):  The Myth of Safe Sex by D. Foley

Critique of: Why Single Men May Not Be Having the Most Fun by W. B. Wilcox (who tends to be a marriage idolater and anti-singles bigot)

Critique of: Why Single Men May Not Be Having the Most Fun by W. B. Wilcox (who tends to be a marriage idolater and anti-singles bigot)

I would encourage you to take anything this Wilcox guy says with a huge grain of salt, especially if it pertains to singleness. 

Wilcox is a huge marriage idolater and is anti-singleness. He has the tendency to write anti-singles editorials in a push to elevate marriage. I’ve written of his anti-singless, singleness fear mongering before (Link): here.

Wilcox seems to feel that if he can scare singles about being single – such as telling us that being single will increase our odds of being raped or getting toe nail fungus or growing a third hand out of our heads – that this will motivate all us singles to run out and marry right away.

Of course, one problem with that view is that there are plenty of singles who do want to marry but are unable to find a partner (see this link as one example, see this link for additional commentary).

These anti-singles marriage idolaters (like Wilcox) just ASSUME all or most singles HATE marriage and are intentionally avoiding it, when such is not the case for all singles.

Guys like Wilcox have this terribly biased view that married life is the only way to go for anyone, that to improve a society or culture, everyone should marry (and marry in their 20s), and live out the 1950s nuclear family Ward and June Cleaver lifestyle, and he (like a lot of my fellow conservatives) is very put off that so many people are opting out of marriage, or just staying single whatever the reason.

So, these marriage idolaters do everything they can to write pages claiming that being single is not as safe, healthy, fun, or wise for individuals or culture as marriage supposedly is.

Articles like this also fail to take into account the “equally yoked” teaching which exists among Christians, a rule which prohibits Christian singles from marrying Non-Christian persons.

The problem with this is that for every single Christian man, there are 55 million single Christian women (no, that’s not an exact figure – it’s my way of saying… There are not enough single males for the single religious ladies who want to marry).

At one point in his article, Wilcox goes on and on about how lonely some single guy is who he discusses as an example of how crummy single life can be for some men.

True, being single can be or feel lonely at times – but so too can being in a marriage.

I was in a long term, serious relationship, and there were times that although I was sitting in the same room as my fiance, I still felt all alone, because the ass hat (my fiance) was not meeting my emotional needs; he did not care to, he was terribly self absorbed. I blogged more about that (Link): here, in this older post if you’d like to read that.

I did a blog post about (Link): women whose husbands developed early dementia – once their husband’s minds “went,” the husbands ceased being being friends and companions to their wives and became large, dependent children.

Having a romantic partner is no guarantee you won’t experience loneliness.

Articles like this one I am linking to you here in this post just perpetuate the notion that there is something “wrong” with being single, or that being single is not “as good” as being married.

I’m not sure if Wilcox is a Christian or not, but I do know that there is nothing in the Bible that says that being married is better than being single, or that everyone being married “cures” society of its problems.

I would not be surprised if singles advocate Bella DePaulo doesn’t, in the future, refute this page by Wilcox in (Link): her column over at Psychology Today – or, you know, it looks like (Link, off site): she’s already refuted the Wilcox page, in a fashion.

Edit (Feb 15, 2016). Ms. DePaulo dropped by and left a comment below. I wanted to edit this post to add a link she left in her comment, and one other one:

This Wilcox piece is singles shaming at its finest – painting singleness as though it’s some mental or physical health problem that needs the cure of marriage. Or, you could say it is a form of ‘singles concern trolling,’ I guess.

Views such as Wilcox’s also suggest that a person cannot or does not become a “whole” person or a mature person unless or until he or she marries – something which the Bible does not endorse at all. A person does not have to marry or become a parent in order to reach maturity or wholeness.

Also note how often Wilcox seems to be stressing people marry in their 20s in his essay – marriage idolaters such as this show no consideration for anyone over 30 or 40 or older who would like to marry but who find themselves single. Marriage-pushers such as Wilcox come across as being very ageist.

(Link): Why Single Men May Not Be Having the Most Fun By W. Bradford Wilcox

Excerpts:

Bradford Wilcox is the (Link): director of the National Marriage Project at the University of Virginia and a senior fellow of the (Link): Institute for Family Studies. He is the coauthor of “Soul Mates: Religion, Sex, Love, and Marriage Among African Americans and Latinos.”

———————–

…Oh, the life of the young single man. Pop culture’s depiction of young men’s single years as impossibly fun, footloose and fancy-free has a certain purchase in our culture. It’s one reason why plenty of young men look at marriage as a “ball and chain,” but that mind-set can have a number of downsides.

Continue reading “Critique of: Why Single Men May Not Be Having the Most Fun by W. B. Wilcox (who tends to be a marriage idolater and anti-singles bigot)”

Husband-Hunting is the Worst Part of a Christian Upbringing – Christianity Made Me Obsessed with Finding a Husband – by B. Ramos

Husband-Hunting is the Worst Part of a Christian Upbringing – Christianity Made Me Obsessed with Finding a Husband – by B. Ramos

(Link):  Husband-hunting is the worst part of a Christian upbringing by B. Ramos 

Excerpts:

Christianity made me obsessed with finding a husband 

June 30, 2015

…Now that I am “old” and married with two kids at the age of 31 (and wasn’t married as I intended at 21), I’m so glad I didn’t go down that road. There’s nothing technically wrong with young marriage, though I personally believe and will tell my children that it’s so, so important to take time to get to know yourself and other people before you make a lifelong commitment.

There is something wrong with being coerced and even brainwashed into thinking you need to get married at a young age to be complete — in the eyes of God and in the eyes of other people.

No, I did not grow up in a Duggar-like cult. I grew up in a fundamental Christian home, which was quite common for my area of South Texas.

I’ve spoken to a number of friends, including my husband who was the son of a Baptist pastor, and our stories match up.

Young people are still being led to believe that young marriage (implying abstinence from sex) is the only way to please God, and these young people who follow this path are not being told the whole story.

Continue reading “Husband-Hunting is the Worst Part of a Christian Upbringing – Christianity Made Me Obsessed with Finding a Husband – by B. Ramos”

Single Adult Christian Pressured Into Marriage by Her Church – And Regrets It

Single Adult Christian Pressured Into Marriage by Her Church – And Regrets It

A few excerpts by a single adult who was pressured to marry by her church but later regretted the marriage and divorced:

(Link): Singles ‘Need’ The Freedom To Choose by All Thinx Christian

I would never have thought the church would be a place where people were compelled to be married, but I found out the hard way that it is.

…Despite my yieldedness  and commitment to the LORD and His people, I was somewhat marginalized and often treated badly (disrespected and short-changed whenever possible) by God’s people.

When I complained about and challenged this behavior in one of the pastors I highly regarded and who was my mentor at the time, he informed me the problem with giving me full leadership support and integrating me into the life of the church was due to unmarried state. He said to me “If you were married, it would be different.”

After about another year of this very painful treatment and believing that the only reason for it was because I was unmarried, one day I went before the LORD and said “If marriage is what it will take for me to be properly treated in the church, then send me somebody and I will marry him.”

Continue reading “Single Adult Christian Pressured Into Marriage by Her Church – And Regrets It”

Leaving Christianity gave me the fairy-tale ending I always wanted / Divorce and pre-marital sex destroyed my relationship with Christianity by T. Sheehan

Leaving Christianity gave me the fairy-tale ending I always wanted / Divorce and pre-marital sex destroyed my relationship with Christianity by T. Sheehan

Even though the details of my life and situation are different, I sure did relate to this lady’s story.

My eye brow did raise at one or two points of this essay, such as her claim that people at her church encouraged her to get an abortion when she became pregnant out of wedlock, and from the way she discusses her church, they sound pretty conservative and legalistic.

Perhaps she is telling the truth and that really did happen, it’s just that most conservative Christians are pro-life, not pro-choice, so I am having a hard time picturing any of them advising a pregnant woman to get an abortion.

With possibly a few wacko Protestant church exceptions, (Link): like this one, where the church’s preacher allegedly encouraged the women members to get abortions. But then, of course, there is information such as this: (Link): 2015 Poll: 70% of American Women Who Have Abortions Identify As Christian

By and large, though, most churches are pro-life, not pro-choice.

At one point in this essay, Sheehan says that although she and her male friend were not having sex, that due to being constantly suspected and accused of having sex by Christians at her church, is actually what in large measure drove her and her boyfriend to become sexually active with one another.

Major irony there. Or maybe not…

As I have said time and again at my blog, most Christians, just like secular culture, just blindly assumes that celibacy is impossible for anyone over the age of 25 or so, and that it is impossible for men and women to be platonic friends.

It is entirely possible for men and women to remain friends, and it is entirely possible for an adult to stay celibate for months or years at a time.

I have also explained before, in previous posts, that one reason there is so much fornication among Christian singles is precisely because most Christians have such low expectations: they expect that single adults will, or have, had sex outside of marriage. It becomes a self-fulfilling prophecy quite often.

The couple discussed in this post were expected, assumed to be, and suspected by their fellow congregants of sleeping together; this couple got tired of being falsely accused, so they figured, well, we might as well have sex, since everyone is already assuming we are and harassing us over it.

I also notice that one reason this woman’s husband, who was a Christian at one time, but is now an atheist or agnostic, began losing his faith over how miserably his grief (over the death of his father) was mishandled by Christians.

Oh yes, I relate: after my family member’s passing a few years ago, rather than receiving love, empathy, and encouragement from Christians in my family or churches I went to, I instead received judgment, criticism, platitudes, or indifference. This in turn is one of several things that caused me to partially leave the Christian faith.

One of a few things that caused Sheehan to leave the faith is over how one church she attended mishandled her abusive marriage – her priest told her to stay with the abusive husband.

This advice is also usually given in Baptist or Protestant situations. Christians often put keeping an (abusive) marriage before the welfare of the two persons who comprise the marriage.

Abused wives are usually instructed to stay with the abusive spouse and submit to the abuser more, or just pray about things. None of this resolves the situation but actually prolongs it.

I am not surprised in light of all the insensitive treatment that she and her husband endured at the hands of other believers, that they both developed major doubts about Christianity and walked away from it.

There were a few supportive comments to the woman who wrote this, in the comments area under the essay, but there were also a lot of hateful, judgmental, or naive posts left to her by Christians.

There were also a few annoying posts by atheists who were just there to say “all religion is idiotic, there is no God” to any of the well-meaning, yet naive Christians who were telling her to hold on to the faith, in spite of the Christians who had been mean to her at her prior churches.

Honestly, I wish those types of atheists would refrain from posting under articles like this one by Sheehan. I find their opportunistic, anti-theism drivel and rants to be about as bad as the nasty posts by the Christians who scolded Sheehan for leaving Christianity.

(Link): Leaving Christianity gave me the fairy-tale ending I always wanted 

  • Divorce and pre-marital sex destroyed my relationship with Christianity by T. Sheehan
  • My family has always been part of the Catholic Church, including being actively involved in fighting for those beliefs in Ireland and France through the centuries. It is all I knew and I never imagined a life without it. Even in today’s permissive society, divorce is still a huge don’t in the Catholic Church.

    When my priest advised me to stay in an abusive marriage rather than lose access to the Catholic religion, I stayed — until my husband left me for one of the many women he had been seeing.

    I went back to my priest for help but instead found myself without a church.

    Confused and directionless, I ended up seeking help at a Word of Faith Christian Church in Texas.

    Although the church and I both believed in Jesus, the similarities ended there. Everything was so different from what I had grown up with, it made the transition very difficult.

    They kept trying to break down my identity by using scripture to suggest that everything about me, from Catholicism to my Irish culture, was evil and against God. It was like going through spiritual boot camp as they attempted to rebuild me into a person that could gain access to heaven.

    During my time there, I met my current husband. He was also having a tough time as his father had died suddenly the year before, causing him to question the church he had been raised in and even the existence of God due to how they handled his grief.

    We became really good friends who spent hours talking as we each struggled with our sheltered worlds collapsing around us, no matter how hard we tried to fight to keep the walls intact.

    The damage in our lives, caused by blind devotion to a religion, forced us to question all the truths we had been raised to believe.

    Continue reading “Leaving Christianity gave me the fairy-tale ending I always wanted / Divorce and pre-marital sex destroyed my relationship with Christianity by T. Sheehan”

She’s Waiting Until Marriage to Have Sex. Here’s Her Response to Those ‘Inevitable Jerks’ Who Think Her Decision Is ‘Stupid’. – by E. Kahn

She’s Waiting Until Marriage to Have Sex. Here’s Her Response to Those ‘Inevitable Jerks’ Who Think Her Decision Is ‘Stupid’ – by E. Kahn

These days, society should be respecting persons who are virgins, whether due to their choice, or because they have not been able to find a suitable partner.

We’re living in a culture that expects us to salute and respect all sexual orientations and behavior, from asexuality to homosexuality, but the same people who expect us to embrace those sexual lifestyles or orientations mock or criticize virginity or celibacy. It’s hugely hypocritical.

I would note on my blog again that leftist secularists are not the only ones who disrespect virginity and celibacy: so do many right wingers and conservative Christians – I have several blog posts with examples of that and analysis.

The following appears on the right wing site The Blaze –

(Link): She’s Waiting Until Marriage to Have Sex. Here’s Her Response to Those ‘Inevitable Jerks’ Who Think Her Decision Is ‘Stupid’

-They in turn got this story from these sites:

(Link): She’s Waiting Until Marriage to Have Sex. Here’s Her Response to Those ‘Inevitable Jerks’ Who Think Her Decision Is ‘Stupid’

January 26, 2016

A young woman who described herself as a “religious Jew” who is waiting until she’s married to have sex has a message for all of the “inevitable jerks” who think that she’s “some lonely, naive little girl” who is “stupid for believing in waiting.”

In a blog post published on relationship website YourTango and on the Huffington Post, Estee Kahn said that she has never seen herself as being “extreme” when it comes to her religion or values, but that many people somehow see her decision to abstain from sex in that light.

Noting that Jews, among many other religious adherents, believe in waiting until marriage to have sex, she said that some people have a hard time understanding why she believes that sex should be reserved for matrimony.

“When I explain my decision to people, they accept it — and some even praise it,” Kahn wrote. “But then there’s those inevitable jerks who think I’m some lonely, naive little girl and that I’m stupid for believing in waiting. I even get this from Jewish men, too.”

Continue reading “She’s Waiting Until Marriage to Have Sex. Here’s Her Response to Those ‘Inevitable Jerks’ Who Think Her Decision Is ‘Stupid’. – by E. Kahn”

Sex, God, and a Generation That Can’t Tell the Difference – Millennials Are the “Judge the Prude” Generation on Sexual Morality (from the Millennial Evangelical blog)

Sex, God, and a Generation That Can’t Tell the Difference –  Millennials Are the “Judge the Prude” Generation on Sexual Morality (from the Millennial Evangelical blog)

This editorial is aimed primarily at Millennials, or is primarily about them, but as someone who is Gen X, I can tell you that the attitudes towards sex that this article attributes to Millennials also holds true for individuals who are older than the Millennials.

I, too, have noticed that our culture disdains judging any and all forms of sexual behavior except for virginity (or celibacy): both right wingers and left wingers, and many Christians and most Non-Christians, are very disparaging and disrespectful towards the concepts of virginity, and towards adult virgins themselves.

Virginity (and celibacy) is shamed, ridiculed, and mocked in our culture by just about every one in every age group, regardless of political affiliation or religious beliefs.

I do not see an author’s name on this page, but it comes from the Millennial Evangelical blog. (Edit. There is someone named Chris Martin listed at the bottom of the page; I assume he is the author?)

(Link): Sex, God, and a Generation That Can’t Tell the Difference –  Millennials Are the “Judge the Prude” Generation on Sexual Morality by Chris Martin (?)

Excerpts:

  • ….The only thing Millennials are black-and-white on when it comes to matters of sexual morality is that you aren’t allowed to be black-and-white on sexual morality.
  • Before, it was stigma to sleep with someone before marriage or with a partner outside of your marriage. Today, college students are shamed as cowards and prudes for retaining their virginity on campuses across the country.
  • Before, you kept your sexual activity quiet for fear of shame; today, you keep your sexual inactivity quiet for the same reason.

Continue reading “Sex, God, and a Generation That Can’t Tell the Difference – Millennials Are the “Judge the Prude” Generation on Sexual Morality (from the Millennial Evangelical blog)”

The Lobster – a movie that sounds like how the church treats adult singles

The Lobster – a movie that sounds like how the church treats adult singles

A really nice lady I follow on Twitter (Christian Janeway; her screen name there is @XianJaneway) tweeted me today, asking me if I had ever heard of this film, and I said, no: lobsterMovie

(Link): The Lobster

Here is how that page reads:

  • In a dystopian near future, single people, according to the laws of The City, are taken to The Hotel, where they are obliged to find a romantic partner in forty-five days or are transformed into beasts and sent off into The Woods.

I told Christian Janeway that sounds pretty much how like most American Christians and churches already treat adult singles. Really.

If this movie ever comes on cable TV, I’ll give it a watch.

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Related Posts:

(Link): The Lobster: A Dystopian Tour de Force (A Movie About Adult Singles)

(Link):   Please Stop Shaming Me for Being Single by J. Vadnal

(Link):   The Netherworld of Singleness for Some Singles – You Want Marriage But Don’t Want to Be Disrespected or Ignored for Being Single While You’re Single

(Link):  Really, It’s Okay To Be Single – In order to protect marriage, we should be careful not to denigrate singleness – by Peter Chin

(Link):  Hey, Justice Kennedy: You don’t need to shame singles to uphold marriage by L. Bonos

(Link): To Get Any Attention or Support from a Church These Days you Have To Be A Stripper, Prostitute, or Orphan

Continue reading “The Lobster – a movie that sounds like how the church treats adult singles”

How To Stop Sexualizing Everything by D. C. McAllister

How To Stop Sexualizing Everything by D. C. McAllister

Before I get to the link of the article by D C McAllister:

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This is rather long, but well worth the read:

(Link): How To Stop Sexualizing Everything by D C McAllister

Excerpts:

  • Our society needs a phileo resurgence so we can express ourselves with the nonsexual passion and love we really feel.
  • … I guess I am kind of weird. I confess: I’m very passionate about my friends. But am I the abnormal one, or is there something wrong with our society? My daughter isn’t unusual, and her response was pretty typical. Many people have that reaction to women who are passionate about their friends—and even more so for men!

    …I wish “bromance” would disappear from the American lexicon forever. That’s because it represents everything that’s wrong with our culture when it comes to friendship.

    Instead of friendship being noble, nonromantic, and normal, it has become the exception, romanticized to the point that we’re uncomfortable describing it and experiencing it for what it is. Even as we try to distinguish it from homosexuality, we are corrupting real friendship by placing it in the context of romance.

    How Romanticism and Puritanism Corrupts Friendship

    The problem with our modern culture is friendship has been corrupted. Lewis says it began with the age of sentimentality and romanticism.

    Continue reading “How To Stop Sexualizing Everything by D. C. McAllister”

FDA: Only Celibate Homosexuals May Donate Blood

FDA: Only Celibate Homosexuals May Donate Blood

This is somewhat funny to me. The FDA has lifted bans on homosexuals donating blood, provided they abstain from homosexual sex for 12 months in a row prior to donating. In other words, they have to practice celibacy.

Now, I find this rather amusing because although I know for a fact that people can damn well go without sex for a lifetime, let alone 12 months, the rest of society – including many conservative Christians, sadly – run about assuming that nobody, no hetero or homosexual, can possibly go without sex, not even for ten minutes in a row.

Why, they teach, people just cannot refrain from sex! Sooner or later everyone is gonna do it, even Christians.

The truth is, everyone is capable of self control and does not have to cave in and have sex – but people choose to have sex.

One troubling aspect of this is that liberals are more concerned about being politically correct than in keeping the blood supply safe.

Some of these liberals even complain about even having a 12 month waiting period in effect (I’ve seen some of them complain about this in some of their blog posts or news articles, such as (Link): this ridiculous page by a Joe Durbin, and this (Link): other ridiculous page at The Daily Beast by Tim Teeman).

(Link):  Blood Donation Ban From Gay Men Ends, Criticism Starts As 1-Year Abstinence Policy Established

(Link):  FDA Keeps Ban on Active Homosexuals Donating Blood

  • by Austin Ruse, December 21, 2015
  • Even though the (Link):  FDA announced this week that homosexuals may give blood, overturning a 30-year-old blanket ban, the government will still not let sexually active homosexuals donate. Any man who identifies as homosexual may only give blood if he stipulates he has not had sexual contact with another man in the previous 12 months.

Continue reading “FDA: Only Celibate Homosexuals May Donate Blood”

Why Are Christian Guys Silent About Abstinence? by C. Hill

Why Are Christian Guys Silent About Abstinence? by C. Hill

The link to the editorial by C. Hill is much farther down the page. I wanted to spend several paragraphs discussing the editorial itself before linking to it.

I sometimes wonder if authors on sites such as Christianity Today or Christian Post read my blog or comments I’ve left on other blogs (under other names or sometimes under the “Christian Pundit” moniker), because some of the points this guy makes are ones that I have made before, that I have not seen other writers make.

One such point: we live in a culture that increasingly demands that we respect everyone else’s sexual behavior and choices, everything from having pre-marital sex, to having homosexual sex, to engaging in adultery.

I’ve even seen increased acceptance of Asexuality.

However, if one is a heterosexual with a normal sex drive and interest in sex who never the less chooses to refrain from sex (i.e., to stay a virgin or be celibate), and especially if one is past one’s mid or late 20s age-wise, one is judged, mocked, or condemned by that same culture.

That is, the same people demanding that I, a hetero celibate / virgin, respect or applaud homosexuality or adultery, are the very same people who would make fun of a person or criticize them for being a virgin over the age of 18 or 25, or being celibate, if having been sexually active before. It’s a very hypocritical position and one that is common, but it’s  seldom a point I’ve seen called out by others.

Continue reading “Why Are Christian Guys Silent About Abstinence? by C. Hill”

Our Bodies Were Not Made for Sex by T. Swann

Our Bodies Were Not Made for Sex by T. Swann

Very interesting editorial.

(Link): Our Bodies Were Not Made for Sex by T. Swann

Excerpts:

  • The Genesis account of creation reveals that God created only one species of human. He said, “Let us make human,” and not “Let us make humans.” What essentially makes one a human then, is being created in God’s image, in God’s “likeness” (Gen.1:26-27). What defines us then is the ruah (Hebrew word for spirit) of God in our bodies (Gen.2:7).
  • God is a spirit. Therefore, when he said, “Let us make man in our own image,” he wasn’t speaking of bodies, but of essence.
  • God created the human body out of dust, a decomposable substance, but what is really human—the soul—is indecomposable. This is the God-like property that dwells in humans. The body is really the “house” or “clothing” of the soul.
  • So if we are the same underneath the “clothing” of our bodies, in our souls, why are so many arguments for gender hierarchy based on that outer covering?

Continue reading “Our Bodies Were Not Made for Sex by T. Swann”

Jesus Christ Removed the Stigma, Shame From Being Single and Childless – by David Instone Brewer

Jesus Christ Removed the Stigma, Shame From Being Single and Childless – by David Instone Brewer

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Reminder:

(Link): Blogger Guy John Morgan Who Accused Me Of Being Untrustworthy Finds My Blog Trustworthy Enough to Use as Resource

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These are just excerpts, so you’ll have to visit the link here to read the page in full:

(Link): Bible Scandals (Ineligible Bachelor) by David Instone-Brewer

Commenting on what it was like to be single in the time and culture of Jesus:

  • …. Girls were mostly married by the age of twelve, and if a man wasn’t married by the age of twenty the gossips started comparing notes and looking for a reason.
  • …. So why was Jesus still single at the age of thirty? It was clear to all who knew him. No-one would let his daughter marry someone of questionable parentage since, if there was any irregularity in their birth, it could cast doubt on the legitimacy of their children for ten generations. And Jesus’ birth, as everyone knew, was very irregular.
  • …. Jesus not only shared the stigma of being single – he also tried to do something to alleviate it for other single people. Jewish law excused eunuchs from the command to marry, because they couldn’t physically fulfil the duty to have children.

Continue reading “Jesus Christ Removed the Stigma, Shame From Being Single and Childless – by David Instone Brewer”

Are You Ashamed of Biblical Sexual Purity? by J. Slattery

Are You Ashamed of Biblical [Sexual] Purity? by J. Slattery

I agree with the author of this that the pendulum has swung too far in the other direction – people now a days seem to take some kind of pride or laissez faire attitude about being sexually promiscuous, while people who abstain are treated like freaks or losers.

On top of that, you have ex Christians or Christian feminists who depict any and all choices to remain sexually abstinent as evidence of the patriarchy, or as being somehow oppressive of women, so that virginity in women past their teens or twenties is cruelly and coldly ridiculed or dismissed.

I do recognize, as I have in much older posts, that yes, some Christians – the wacko, fringe cultic type groups – do make much too much out of female virginity (while simultaneously not emphasizing male virginity, which is hypocritical and sexist), and some of these fringe groups do turn virginity into an idol.

However, many to most Christians today represent all of sexual purity, celibacy, and virginity as having been made idols, and I totally disagree with this perspective. The majority of editorials I see, even on conservative Christian blogs, continually insist that sexual purity (which includes virginity) is of no import.

These blogs and articles that act as apologetics of fornication (and again, I am including conservative Christian sites and groups among these), regularly besmirch virginity and celibacy as being sexist in and of themselves, or as unfair to women, or as being nothing but products of the patriarchy. It never seems to occur to the people pushing these views that women such as myself find this anti-virginity, or anti-celibacy, rhetoric deeply insulting, as we mostly or fully voluntarily chose to abstain of our own free will.

I would say that, yes, the majority of Christians today are deeply ashamed of sexual purity, especially as presented in the Bible, and some of the rest are infuriated that it exists and find it insulting.

At any rate, here is a link to the page:

(Link): Are You Ashamed of Biblical Purity? by J. Slattery

Excerpts:

  • Sexual purity has been in the news a lot lately. A topic typically reserved for church groups has become of interest to the mainstream media. In a recent example, the television show The View picked up on the viral popularity of Brelyn Bowman, a 22-year-old who celebrated her purity on her wedding day by presenting a doctor’s certificate to her father. Actress Candace Cameron Bure drew scorn from the other women on the panel when she defended Bowman’s decision.
  • Whether or not you agree that social media is a place to document your virginity, it takes courage nowadays to voice a biblical view of sexuality. Remember the teasing that came Tim Tebow’s way when he voiced a commitment to sexual purity? Taking a public stand on sexual purity is about as popular killing kittens.
  • In a world in which sexual license is creating so much havoc, why is it taboo to be a proponent of God’s design for sexuality? In fact, educators who know the research about the effects of sex outside of marriage should be applauding the choice instead of mocking it. But even Christians have called into questions the importance of embracing a biblical sexual ethic.

Continue reading “Are You Ashamed of Biblical Sexual Purity? by J. Slattery”

When Sex Becomes Abusive in Marriage by J. Slattery

When Sex Becomes Abusive in Marriage by J. Slattery

There are men who identify as Christian who think the Bible teaches they are owed sex by their wives. They cherry pick and distort one or two Bible verses to try to prove this point (although the Bible says 1. the husband’s body is not his own but belongs to his wife and 2. though it is fine for a couple to abstain from sex).

There’s this guy who runs a very sexist blog where he claims that wives owe men sex, and if they don’t “put out” that the husband should punish the wife. This guy claims to be a Christian, and his blog posts are so “over the top” that people can’t figure out if he’s serious or a troll or a Poe.

You can read about him on SCCL (Stuff Christian Culture Likes) group (Link): here or (Link): here. I don’t want to directly link to the guy’s blog from mine, at least not at this time.

I have read Christian men online who claim there is no such thing as “marital rape,” though there is such a thing (laws in our nation even recognize it and outlaw it), and God does not condone of marital rape, of men taking a wife forcefully, or guilt tripping or manipulating her into sex, or threatening to punish her financially or in some other manner to get sex.

There is a lot of male entitlement among Christian men, and in certain denominations, theologies, or churches. Some preachers actually encourage this male entitlement. They twist the Scriptures to tell women that it’s God’s design for their spouse to rule over them, to get every whim and need satisfied when and how he wants it, and so on.

Many men – and this includes a lot of Christian ones – mistakenly believe that woman’s only role is to serve men, cater to men, whether that be sexually, to do nothing but cook and clean for a spouse, to bolster a man’s ego, to give them encouragement.

Never do these selfish, sexist male oafs consider how they can pamper the women around them, give encouragement to women, or meet a woman’s sexual needs and desires.

One of my disagreements in this otherwise fine piece I link you to below and offer a few excperts is where the author says that the Bible calls the husband to be “the leader” in the home – actually, no, it does not. That is a traditionalist, or complementarian type of interpretation of certain passages.

Here are off-site links to pages by Christians who have interpretations that dispute the traditional or complementarian view of marriage:

Without further ado, here are excerpts from “When Sex Becomes Abusive in Marriage” by J. Slattery.

(I don’t want to copy the entire article, so be sure to use the link here to visit their page to read the entire article, if this sort of topic interests you – I have placed portions of the article I found especially pertinent in bold face):

(Link):  When Sex Becomes Abusive in Marriage by J. Slattery

  • Sexual abuse can happen in marriage. Here are a few ways to identify it.
  • Sexual abuse within marriage can be quite a confusing concept. After all, doesn’t the Bible teach that a wife’s body belongs to her husband, and her husband’s body belongs to her?

  • Specifically, it says, “The wife gives authority over her body to her husband, and the husband gives authority over his body to his wife” (1 Corinthians 7:4). Husbands have been known to quote such biblical teaching as a justification for sexually abusing their wives or demanding sex as a God-given right, but this verse seems to leave both a woman and man open to unwanted sex.

  • The recent popularity of BDSM (which stands for Bondage, Dominance, Sadism, and Masochism) has blurred the lines of consensual sex even more. A couple that may begin by consensually experimenting with one person dominating the other in the bedroom may end up violating the will of the “submissive” spouse. This is simply sexual abuse by a chic name.
  • It’s critical to be able to recognize when your marriage has become abusive in the bedroom.
  • The dictionary defines the verb abuse as “to use something to a bad effect or for a bad purpose.” God did not create sex to be a weapon used to harm, manipulate, or coerce.

Continue reading “When Sex Becomes Abusive in Marriage by J. Slattery”

Bride Presents Father With ‘Certificate of Purity’ on Wedding Day – My Thoughts On the Matter

Bride Presents Father With ‘Certificate of Purity’ on Wedding Day

I actually am not terribly interested in discussing this particular news story, but it is right up the alley for this blog, so I feel obligated to a point.

I’ve seen this news story show up on my Twitter account from other people, and in various Christian groups or blogs I visit. I figured that may be another reason I should hop into the fray.

Here is a link about it:

(Link): Md. bride presents father with ‘certificate of purity’ on wedding day

Here is an excerpt from that page with some comments by me below the excerpts:

  • To some people, the idea of waiting for marriage might seem old fashioned, but not for Timothy and Brelyn Bowman. The 20-somethings tied the knot earlier this month in Prince George’s County, and they were virgins when they wed.
  • To prove it, Brelyn presented her father, Pastor Mike Freeman, with a ‘certificate of purity’ on her wedding day. Soon after the wedding, the couple’s social media posts went viral.
  • Appearing on Good Day DC, Brelyn said she signed a pledge to remain a virgin until marriage when she was 13. FOX 5’s Steve Chenevey asked Brelyn how her father reacted to the certificate that she presented to him.
  • “He was so excited because it’s not nothing he required. He didn’t ask, ‘I need you to go and present this.’ It was something because I kept my word,” said Brelyn Bowman. “My sister, who was a virgin when she got married, did the same thing. And she was an example for me, so now I can be an example for others.”

This news story has been discussed on various sites, including

Here is an excerpt from the coverage at SSB, which I believe was written by SSB’s founder, Julie Anne (whom I do really like and respect):

  • I am disgusted that this young lady felt the need to go to a doctor to get a note from him to prove her virginity. Would her father not take her at her word?

To be fair to the father, I have so far not seen a news story saying that the father insisted that the daughter go through a medical exam to prove her virginity (or that she possessed an intact hymen) to him.

Yes, some people, especially ones who are angered at this news story, are attempting to make a distinction between virginity and having an intact hymen.

Yes, it is true that some females can tear their hymen by playing sports and so on, but I think this is a semantic quibble.

Generally speaking, having an intact hymen is part of female virginity; it is usual for women virgins to have an intact hymen. The two concepts are usually linked. So, for whatever reason, I don’t get as angry or upset as others are by this part of the story.

I do think that men who are utterly obsessed with a woman’s virginity or hymen and insist on marrying only a virgin may be  on the sexist side. Although I think these sorts of men are few and far between: most men today prefer to marry NON-virgin women (see (Link): this page on this blog for more on that issue).

I, a virgin woman, would prefer to marry a male virgin, but I know by this time in life, most guys I meet to date will be non-virgins, guys who are divorced or who are widowers, and I’d assume most of them were sexually active with their previous wife. I’ve learned to accept that fact of life and consider other factors in a guy – so men need to do the same with women.

One article I read, from New York Post, I think it was, made it sound like it was the young woman’s, Bowman’s, idea to pursue the “intact hymen” certificate and to publicize it, not her father’s (link to that is below, under the “additional off site links” section).

Here are some of my thoughts on this story, based off the handful of news articles and commentary I’ve seen online.

Off the top of my head, I’m not quite sure what I make of the story.

I’m not really sure if I am for or against this woman getting a certificate of intact hymen signed by a doctor and making this information public.

What I will say is this….

Continue reading “Bride Presents Father With ‘Certificate of Purity’ on Wedding Day – My Thoughts On the Matter”

Sex as Cultural Idol – post at S. McKnight’s Blog (Re: Brian Harris book)

Sex as Cultural Idol – post at S. McKnight’s Blog

Not only is sex a secular cultural idol, it has been turn into an idol by most denominations of American Christianity – right along with marriage and natalism (“the nuclear family”) being turned into idols.

I’m only going to do an excerpt about sex, the part of the McKnight post that talks about sex being made into an idol by culture. Please click the link below to visit the guy’s blog to read the rest of the post.

Sex has been turned into such a huge idol by secular culture that virgins are having to write posts defending remaining a virgin (such as (Link): mentioned in this post)

Really, people – culture – should respect virginity more, and respect the choice of adults to stay virgins (or to be celibates, in the case of fornicators who are now abstaining, though not all celibates are non-virgins).

People who are virgins should not have to write blog posts or essays explaining why they are virgins, or to defend their lifestyle choice on that score.

Virgins having to explain or defend their virginity is doubly offensive and amazing in that we are living in a culture that celebrates any and all forms of sexual deviancy and behavior, aside from maybe things like pedophilia.

(Link): Cultural Idols and the Church

Excerpts:

  • …Brian Harris, in his fine new book, The Big Picture: Building Blocks of a Christian World View, examines our complicities in our cultures.
  • …To foster conversation about our [Christianity’s] relationship to culture, Brian examines the classic typology of H. Richard (not Reinhold) Niebuhr (but Reinhold’s brother).
  • Here are the five [the Christian Pundit blog is listing only one of the five]:
  • Idol 4: Sex — he observes that the kingdom will be a “sex free zone” (59), relativizing sex, leading to this:

Continue reading “Sex as Cultural Idol – post at S. McKnight’s Blog (Re: Brian Harris book)”