TV Show Triggers Chinese Virginity Debate

TV Show Triggers Chinese Virginity Debate

(Link): TV Show Triggers Chinese Virginity Debate by Y. Zhao

“He asked me whether I am a virgin,” says Qiu Yingying, bursting into tears.

She has just found out her relationship with boyfriend Ying Qin is over, after he found out she had had sex in the past.

The scene from China’s biggest soap opera right now, Ode to Joy, has triggered much discussion on whether virginity is still a prized asset for women in modern China.

Ode to Joy, now in its second season, tells the stories of five beautiful women from different walks of life who live in the same floor of an apartment complex in Shanghai.

The show, a less risque version of Sex and the City, is popular among women for its focus on romance, careers, friendships and the difficulties women face in the big city.

‘Out-of-dated topic’

Sex education in China is often poor. There are stories of male biology teachers skipping details of the female reproductive system in class and ask students to learn it by themselves.

And parents very rarely share information about sex with their children.

What almost all parents do, however, is warn their daughters not to have any dates before they graduate from university, fearing that they get hurt or become pregnant.

Chinese communities also traditionally expect chastity before marriage.

That means TV dramas are very influential in shaping audiences’ values. They are windows for young audiences, especially young women, to understand sex and sexuality and the ways views are changing.

Double standards on virginity

Zi Yin, a Shanghai-based film assistant producer, told the BBC that even debating the topic was old-fashioned in the 21st Century. She thought it was “disgusting” for the show to make an issue of it.

Continue reading “TV Show Triggers Chinese Virginity Debate”

Vietnam man, 44, stabs a wedding guest to death after he was booed off stage during a tragic karaoke performance

Vietnam man, 44, stabs a wedding guest to death after he was booed off stage during a tragic karaoke performance

I guess they take their karaoke real serious over there.

(Link):  Vietnam man, 44, stabs a wedding guest to death after he was booed off stage during a tragic karaoke performance

May 25, 2017

  • Nguyen Ngoc Diep, 44, was singing at wedding in southern Vietnam on Thursday
  • He was furious when a guest mocked his singing and stole his microphone
  • Diep began brawling with the guest, who ended up seriously injured in hospital
  • Attacker then stabbed another guest Le Hong An, 35, when he tried to stop him 
  • Diep has been arrested since going on the horrific rampage, local media said

A man at a wedding in Vietnam stabbed a fellow guest to death and seriously injured another after he was booed off stage during a karaoke performance.

Continue reading “Vietnam man, 44, stabs a wedding guest to death after he was booed off stage during a tragic karaoke performance”

‘STD-Verified’ Dating App Called NeatClub – article by J. Burns

‘STD-Verified’ Dating App Called NeatClub – article by J. Burns

So sad we’re living in a day and age where this sort of thing is necessary. And yes, there are advantages to being celibate… like avoiding getting STIs.

You don’t need funding or a government program to avoid getting an STI – being celibate will do the trick, and it’s free.

(Link): ‘STD-Verified’ Dating App Is Startup Culture Via Nutshell: Frank, Unchecked, Inevitable

Again, the idea behind NeatClub isn’t totally surprising, and could easily be tempting for anyone who’s experienced the fear surrounding STIs and exposure to them.

By phone, founder Ashka Shah noted that medical experts have described the ongoing rise in STI cases in the United States as an epidemic–one that particularly affects gay and bisexual men, and which the CDC credits in large part to related funding cuts in recent years, Slate pointed out.

Despite this, sexually active folk aren’t showing up for testing like they should, and often for different reasons, according to Shah. “My research showed it was partially stigma and partially ignorance,” she said.

By inviting daters to get their status and any disclosure thereof settled at the start, Shah said, she hopes the app will help break down some of that stigma while helping to keep people safer.

Continue reading “‘STD-Verified’ Dating App Called NeatClub – article by J. Burns”

More Americans Are Marrying People of Other Races Than Ever Before

More Americans Are Marrying People of Other Races Than Ever Before

(Link): More Americans Are Marrying People of Other Races Than Ever Before

On June 12, 2017, it will have been 50 years since the U.S. Supreme Court decided that Americans should in fact be allowed to marry a partner of whatever race they want. Since then, many American couples have availed themselves of that right, although white people remain much less likely to marry another race than people of other races, according to a new report from Pew Research.

…The newlyweds most likely to be intermarried are Asian or Hispanic. Almost 30% of Asians who married in 2015 wed someone of another race, and about 27% of Hispanics married a non-Hispanic, says Pew.

Continue reading “More Americans Are Marrying People of Other Races Than Ever Before”

2017 Study Urges Caution in Dating Co-Workers

2017 Study Urges Caution in Dating Co-Workers

(Link):  The Surefire Way to Turn Your Worklife Into a Living Hell

Excerpts:

“We are spending more time at work,” said Elaine Swann, a lifestyle and etiquette expert. “Relationships are now becoming more acceptable — especially because our work environments have become a lot more casual than they were in yesteryear.”

This comes as we are spending more time than ever in the workplace — the average work week in 2015 was 38.7 hours, compared with 38.1 hours in 1980 — and more than half of American employees didn’t take all their vacation days in 2015.

Continue reading “2017 Study Urges Caution in Dating Co-Workers”

A New Experiment Regarding Dating Sites Found that Personality Always Trumps Attractiveness by Q. Fottrell

A 2017 Experiment Regarding Dating Sites Found that Personality Always Trumps Attractiveness

I can believe it, which is why although I’m picky about looks in guys, I will still give a less than stellar looking guy a chance if he has some other quality that off-sets “meh” looks, like he treats me really nice, or has a great sense of humor.

I’m afraid that 99% of American men have yet to figure this out, though – if you go through life judging women based mostly on their looks (you’re unwilling to date anything less than a stick figure Victoria Secret’s model who must be under the age of 30), as most men do, you’re either going to die a lonely, single man, or, you’re going to end up with a very pretty yet very snobbish, catty, or money grubbing bitch for a wife, and you’ll end up divorced eventually.

(Link): A new laboratory experiment found that personality always trumps attractiveness

Excerpts:

…The results [of the experiment]? After rating their conversation partners for attractiveness, social attractiveness, fun, humor and charisma, the dates with the best personalities had the biggest bump post-meeting in their overall attractiveness as potential partners.

Continue reading “A New Experiment Regarding Dating Sites Found that Personality Always Trumps Attractiveness by Q. Fottrell”

“Marriageable Men” Are No Longer a Hot Economic Commodity, New Study Says by M. Solis

“Marriageable Men” Are No Longer a Hot Economic Commodity, New Study Says

(Link): “Marriageable Men” Are No Longer a Hot Economic Commodity, New Study Says – May 2017, by Marie Solis

Turns out, she’s just not that into you.

According to a paper from the National Bureau of Economic Research, fewer women are relying on stable, high-earning male partners to have children.

Researchers from the University of Maryland discovered this trend when they examined the fracking boom, a “positive economic shock” which they said caused wage spikes for non-college educated men. In the past, these kinds of income increases have been associated with accompanying spikes in heterosexual marriage rates, as with the coal booms of the 1970s and ’80s.

But that’s not the case in 2017.

Continue reading ““Marriageable Men” Are No Longer a Hot Economic Commodity, New Study Says by M. Solis”

Florida Man Faked Stage 4 Cancer to Lure In The Ladies

Florida Man Faked Stage 4 Cancer to Lure In The Ladies

(Link): Florida Man Faked Stage 4 Cancer to Lure In The Ladies – May 2017

Several women are accusing a Florida man of faking stage 4 cancer and manipulating them to get food, money, and shelter, just weeks after his wedding to a long-lost love went viral.

Ken Boyer, 60, of Palm Bay, first gained notoriety when (Link): WKMG-TV covered his wedding to a Missouri woman named Michelle Kimbrel in May. Boyer claimed he “reconnected” with Kimbrel on Facebook a few weeks before they tied the knot.

When Boyer’s story went viral, women across Florida started contacting the station, claiming they recognized Boyer as a former fling.

Continue reading “Florida Man Faked Stage 4 Cancer to Lure In The Ladies”

Sologamy – Marrying Yourself

Sologamy – Marrying Yourself

Personally, I feel this is weird.

But I get it. Women get tired of people asking them, “When are you going to marry” as though a woman’s not truly valid until she gets a husband.

I note that many of my fellow conservatives are totally mocking it – but most of these people have been married for decades and are blind to how bad society idolizes marriage and shames anyone who is still single past the age of 29.

I wouldn’t marry myself, as I find it an odd concept, but I can see how other singles might do something like this to send the message they are valuable on their own, and they are tired of friends and family asking them when they are going to marry.

(Link):  Women across the world are ditching men for Sologamy, here’s why we have mixed feelings about this trend

(Link):   What is a ‘sologamist’ and why are people doing it?

Continue reading “Sologamy – Marrying Yourself”

She Married A Christian Psychopath She Met Via A Dating Site

She Married a Christian Psychopath She Met Via a Dating Site

There are times I am reading articles, not intending to make any blog posts here, but there’s something in the article that fits with this blog.

In this article, for example, which discusses how experts can spot psychopathy in children as young as age 3, there is a story about a psychopath named Carl.

(The link to the article that mentions the psychopath named Carl is much farther down the page. I wanted to talk about it first before linking to the page.)

The article says that as Carl gets older – around his 20s, I think – he becomes a Christian, meets a woman on a dating site, marries her, has a son with her, and has a few affairs on her, and later gets arrested.

I don’t think the wife in the story realized that the guy she was marrying was a psychopath, not at first.

Using dating sites can be scary – I’ve featured several articles on my blog of women who met men on dating sites who later raped, robbed, or murdered those women. (Sometimes, though not as often, some women use dating sites to rob or kill men.)

Next up, I don’t see the point in Christians promoting the “Equally Yoked” teaching any longer.

I know I have no desire to marry a guy who has been diagnosed to be a psychopath, and who will have affair after affair on me.

A guy who says he’s a Christian or who goes to church regularly is not any better than a guy who is not a Christian or who doesn’t go to church.

In my younger slightly more naive days, I know I likely would’ve given a man such as Carl more benefit of the doubt, had I seen him on a dating site and he proclaimed himself to be a Christian.

I now realize a man saying he’s a Christian doesn’t indicate much of anything. A man who says he’s a Christian can be a rapist, serial killer, or serial adulterer.

Continue reading “She Married A Christian Psychopath She Met Via A Dating Site”

She Was Basically a Slave in America And Never Married or Had Sex

She Was Basically a Slave in America And Never Married or Had Sex

This was a very long, sad, and interesting read.

The woman who was basically kept a slave her whole life in the United States never married, never had sex – she had those choices taken from her, in a round-about way. Her name was Eudocia Tomas Pulido, but the family that used her as a full-time, live- in domestic help called her Lola.

(Link):  My Family’s Slave

Excerpts:

She lived with us for 56 years. She raised me and my siblings without pay. I was 11, a typical American kid, before I realized who she was.

by Alex Tizon (who passed away in March 2017)

….During the 12 years she [Lola] lived in our house, I asked her questions about herself, trying to piece together her life story, a habit she found curious. To my inquiries she would often respond first with “Why?” Why did I want to know about her childhood? About how she met Lieutenant Tom?

I tried to get my sister Ling to ask Lola about her love life, thinking Lola would be more comfortable with her. Ling cackled, which was her way of saying I was on my own.

Continue reading “She Was Basically a Slave in America And Never Married or Had Sex”

Texas Man Sues Date For Texting During “Guardians of the Galaxy” Movie

Texas Man Sues Date For Texting During “Guardians of the Galaxy” Movie

(Link): Texas Man Sues Date For Texting During “Guardians of the Galaxy” Movie by Faith Karimi, May 2017

A Texas man is demanding a refund from his date after she texted while they were at the movies in Austin.

Brandon Vezmar filed a petition at a small claims court seeking $17.31 in damages.
He claims he spent that much money to take his unidentified date to a 3-D showing of “Guardians of the Galaxy, Vol. 2” on May 6, he told the Austin American-Statesman.
“After the movie started, defendant activated her phone at least 10-20 times in 15 minutes to read and send text messages, in direct violation of the theater’s policy, ” his petition states.
Vezmar accuses his date of “adversely affecting the viewing experience” of moviegoers.
“While damages sought are modest, the principle is important as defendant’s behavior is a threat to civilized society,” his petition says.
Vezmar told the newspaper that he met the woman online, and that it was their first date.
“It was kind of a first date from hell,” he said, adding that texting at the movies is, “like, one of my biggest pet peeves.”

The Reason Why Men Marry Some Women And Not Others by D. Brennan

The Reason Why Men Marry Some Women And Not Others by D. Brennan

If you’re a single woman who’d like to be married, you definitely need to read the following page. It’s very long but well worth the read.

I will only copy some excerpts from the page, not the entire thing.

(Link): The Reason Why Men Marry Some Women And Not Others

He’s not a dating expert, nor an advice columnist, psychologist or relationship therapist. His expertise lies in the field of market research and he applies his scientific skills to educate women with all they need to know about men.

In his book, “Why Men Marry Some Women and Not Others,” author John Molloy says that women will discover the proven facts and figures that will help them find and marry Mr. Right. Here’s an excerpt:

Is he old enough to marry?

This survey uncovered some interesting facts. The first was that there is an age when a man is ready to marry-the Age of Commitment. The age varies from man to man, but there are patterns that are easily identified:

  • …Once men reach age 47 to 50 without marrying, the chances they will marry do not disappear, but they drop dramatically.

Signing off on the scene

When we conducted a focus group with 12 men who had just proposed to women, we learned that men were far more likely to marry when they got tired of the singles scene.

…They had not stopped dating. It’s just that they were no longer going to singles hangouts and trying to pick up women several times a week.

…There were two notable exceptions to the age guidelines: men who were balding or heavy. Losing hair or putting on weight often makes men look older, and when a man looks older in singles places, he is often treated by the women as if he doesn’t belong.

Bachelors for life?

It’s easy to spot a confirmed bachelor. He’s so used to living alone that he will list the pleasures of the solo life-coming and going as he pleases, not answering to anyone as reasons for not marrying. But there’s still hope.

Continue reading “The Reason Why Men Marry Some Women And Not Others by D. Brennan”

Motherhood Is Not A Woman’s Most Important Job by J. Wright

Motherhood Is Not A Woman’s Most Important Job by J. Wright

(Link): Motherhood Is Not A Woman’s Most Important Job by J. Wright

Excerpts:

…Except, for women, their mothering skills are becoming an increasingly relevant topic of discussion. In the past year, women have been told either implicitly or explicitly that traditional roles are the ones they should be most focused on fulfilling. We’re dealing with a President who has said “putting a wife to work is a dangerous thing,” because, “a softness disappeared.” He also said that “when I come home and dinner’s not ready, I go through the roof.”

….Being a parent is a source of joy and challenge and meaning for many humans of all genders. But it’s not the most important job there is. It’s not even technically a job, insofar as it pays no money. It is more like a very demanding volunteer position that you can never, ever get out of.

And, as rewarding as that position may be, producing a younger person is not necessarily the main contribution people make to the world. People can probably not tell you how many children Harriet Tubman or Marie Curie or Elizabeth Cady Stanton had, but they can, hopefully, tell you what they did.

Continue reading “Motherhood Is Not A Woman’s Most Important Job by J. Wright”

Mom Allegedly Beats Son Who Gave Mother’s Day Card to Grandmother, Not Her

Mom Allegedly Beats Son Who Gave Mother’s Day Card to Grandmother, Not Her

Why, why, why, are so many of my fellow conservatives so doggedly determined to defend a secular holiday which unnecessarily alienates or hurts so many people (such as infertile couples, etc), and things like this happen (and, I find this story to be heart-breaking – the kid was just trying to give his grandmother a card, for pete’s sake):

(Link): Mom allegedly beats son who gave Mother’s Day card to grandmother, not her – May 14, 2017

A South Carolina mother has been accused of beating her young son after the boy made a Mother’s Day card for his grandmother, but not one for her.

Spartanburg Police said Shontrell Murphy, 30, repeatedly hit her 6-year-old son after ripping up the card, Fox Carolina reported.

Continue reading “Mom Allegedly Beats Son Who Gave Mother’s Day Card to Grandmother, Not Her”

Pimps Are Targeting, Recruiting Women Through Online Dating Sites – Including Christian Women

Pimps Are Targeting, Recruiting Women Through Online Dating Sites – Including Christian Women

(Link): Pimps Are Targeting, Recruiting Women Through Online Dating Sites – Including Christian Women – by L Fletcher April 2017

Excerpt:

Forty million Americans use dating sites to find an evening out, a relationship, or even their life-long love.

They think they know who they’re conversing with. They’ve read a potential date’s bio, shared photos, and maybe they even checked out their Facebook page.

But what they see may be dangerously different than what they get.

“It happened very quickly,” Andrea Benson said. “He had groomed me within two months, and pimped me out.”

Benson is a college graduate, raised in a Christian home with a close family.

“I just really wanted to be loved. I wanted to get married and have a family. I went on an online dating website and met this guy and it was a fast and furious romance.”

But what she didn’t know was that “this guy”, who promised her everything, was a pimp.

Continue reading “Pimps Are Targeting, Recruiting Women Through Online Dating Sites – Including Christian Women”

The Many Reasons That People Are Having Less Sex (2017 article via BBC News)

The Many Reasons That People Are Having Less Sex (2017 article via BBC News)

I have to say, even in spite of their citing a few studies here and there, I think some of these researchers are over-selling sex.

(Link): The Many Reasons That People Are Having Less Sex

Excerpts:

The average sex life appears to be dwindling – and it may reflect some troubling anxieties at the heart of modern society, says Simon Copland.

We live in one of the most sexually liberated times of human history. Access to new technologies over the past 40 years, whether it is the contraceptive pill, or dating apps such as Grindr and Tinder, have opened a new world of possibilities.

As the sexual revolution of the 1970s matured, societal norms shifted with it, with increasing acceptance of homosexuality, divorce, pre-marital sex, and alternative relationships such as polyamory and swinging.

Despite this, research suggests that we’re actually having less sex now than we have for decades

Continue reading “The Many Reasons That People Are Having Less Sex (2017 article via BBC News)”

What If Marriage Is Overrated? – A social psychologist has been chipping away at many claims about marriage changing one’s life for the better

What If Marriage Is Overrated? – A social psychologist has been chipping away at many claims about marriage changing one’s life for the better

(Link):  What If Marriage Is Overrated?  by Jesse Singal
– A social psychologist has been chipping away at many claims about marriage changing one’s life for the better

When I attended the American Psychological Association’s annual conference in Denver last August, the best and most well-attended talk I saw was by (Link): Bella DePaulo, a social psychologist at the University of California, Santa Barbara, who studies single people.

For years, DePaulo has been chipping away at the commonly held belief — a myth, in her view and according to her research — that marriage offers unique happiness and well-being benefits. These findings are seriously overstated or misleading, DePaulo has argued, and if there weren’t so much intense social pressure to get married, a lot more people would be single, and many of them might be happier as a result.

Continue reading “What If Marriage Is Overrated? – A social psychologist has been chipping away at many claims about marriage changing one’s life for the better”

Your Church’s Mother’s Day Carnation is Not Worth Any Woman’s Broken Heart – A Critique of ‘When Mother’s Day Feels Like a Minefield’ by L. L. Fields

Your Church’s Mother’s Day Carnation is Not Worth Any Woman’s Broken Heart – A Critique of ‘When Mother’s Day Feels Like a Minefield’ by L. L. Fields

Please note this blog post has undergone some modifications here and there since I first published it – a few fixed typos, some additional thoughts have been added here and there.


Here’s the link to the editorial – below it, I will comment about it, then a bit later, provide some excerpts from it, followed by yet more critiques):

(Link):  When Mother’s Day Feels Like a Minefield –  Let’s reimagine ways we can honor mothers without wounding others.   by L L Fields via Christianity Today magazine

Here are some of my thoughts about the editorial:

As I first began reading it, I had high hopes. I was optimistic.

It started out on the right foot but descended into a let-down where Fields is arguing for the status quo, which is inexcusable, especially after she admits she was educated, (after she publicly asked for feedback from women), as to how so many women find church Mother’s Day celebrations so painful.

(The summary of her piece: she doesn’t really care about your pain, you childless woman, or you women who are grieving for their dead mothers; she still wants her mother’s day carnation handed to her by a pastor, dammit, and culture doesn’t do near enough, she argues, to honor motherhood!
She would no doubt want to push back and say, ‘hey, I do care about other women’s pain’ – but no, she does not, if she is still arguing to keep Mother’s Day in place as-is. Please keep reading.)

First of all, motherhood is a choice for many women.

You chose to have a child. If there is one thing I cannot stand, it’s women who deliberately walk into a pregnancy and then spend 15 – 20 years complaining about how exhausting motherhood is.

Continue reading “Your Church’s Mother’s Day Carnation is Not Worth Any Woman’s Broken Heart – A Critique of ‘When Mother’s Day Feels Like a Minefield’ by L. L. Fields”

Your Credit Score May Impact Your Dating Life

Your Credit Score May Impact Your Dating Life

(Link):   A bad credit score could affect your dating prospects

(Link):  When You Should Ask A Date For Their Credit Score

(Link): Study: Bad credit score has impact on dating life

(Link):  Survey: Low credit scores might scare away potential mates

(Link):  More research stresses financial compatibility in relationships

Continue reading “Your Credit Score May Impact Your Dating Life”