The Art of Being Single by E. Bernstein

The Art of Being Single by E. Bernstein

(Link): The Art of Being Single

Excerpts:

March 2019

After Katie Tomaszewski divorced at the age of 28, she felt ashamed to be alone.

So she did what she thought a single person should do: She over-dated, over-worked and over-socialized, inviting friends over for dinner nearly every night because she was afraid of being lonely.

“It was constant socializing and constant distraction,” says Ms. Tomaszewski, now a 36-year-old Pilates instructor in Chicago. “I became desperate and depressed, looking for someone—anyone—to save me from being alone.”

Yes, it can be tough to be single. But a new study published this past December in the Journals of Gerontology offers hope for those who are struggling.

Singles today are more satisfied with their lives than singles in the past, the study found.

Continue reading “The Art of Being Single by E. Bernstein”

So-Called Virginity Tests Are Unreliable, Invasive and Sexist. And Yet They Persist. by H. Ka

So-Called Virginity Tests Are Unreliable, Invasive and Sexist. And Yet They Persist. by H. Kaur

I don’t agree with all content in this editorial or ones like it.

I don’t share the view that virginity is a “social construct,” as is stated in this editorial.

American culture shames people who are NOT sexually active – there is no respect from culture, churches, liberals, conservatives, atheists, Christians or anyone else, for virginity.

(Link): So-Called Virginity Tests Are Unreliable, Invasive and Sexist. And Yet They Persist.

(CNN) The comments, as soon as they made the rounds, were met with swift condemnation: Rapper T.I. says he takes his daughter to the gynecologist after each birthday to determine if she’s a virgin.

Celebrities and the Twittersphere howled in disbelief. Human rights advocates and doctors tut tutted their disapproval. The hosts of the podcast Ladies Like Us, where T.I. made the remarks, distanced themselves. (CNN could not reach T.I. for comment.)

As doctors and scientists will tell you, there is no test or exam that can reliably and accurately determine whether a girl or a woman has had sex — and consequently assess whether she’s a “virgin.”

Continue reading “So-Called Virginity Tests Are Unreliable, Invasive and Sexist. And Yet They Persist. by H. Ka”

Let’s Stop Praising Men Who Deign To Date Women Almost Their Own Age by B. Ellen

Let’s Stop Praising Men Who Deign To Date Women Almost Their Own Age by B. Ellen

(Link): Let’s Stop Praising Men Who Deign To Date Women Almost Their Own Age by B. Ellen

Excerpts:

Nov 9, 2019

Sexual politics hasn’t really evolved much if Keanu Reeves is hailed as a feminist

Keanu Reeves comes across as a sweetheart, but I’m not sure he actually deserves a sainthood for dating artist Alexandra Grant, who, at 46, is still nine years younger than him.

Nevertheless, their recent appearance on the red carpet (Grant, elegant with natural grey hair) was hailed as refreshing, even groundbreaking.

So it goes with the twisted maths of male-female age-appropriateness, especially in Hollywood – a man seen with anyone who isn’t half his age is hailed as a feminist god walking among us.

But why wouldn’t Reeves date Grant? She appears to be smart, talented, fun, a catch. But this is beyond one couple – this is about the gender politics of success and how society tells successful men that they “deserve” not only a beautiful, but also a much younger woman.

…Then there’s that other kind of age gap, with the freaky gendered socioeconomic dimension – where snagging a much younger woman becomes as much a signifier of male success as a mansion or a Porsche.

Here, the younger woman is less a human being than a male acquisition or achievement. I always wondered why some men were forever moaning nastily about gold-diggers.

…For women, the rules are different. Helena Bonham Carter has just been in the news with a much younger partnerand you’d have thought that witchcraft (bubbling cauldrons, the lot) must have been involved for this 53-year-old to lure this younger man into her aged lair. It barely matters that Bonham Carter is beautiful, talented and successful. That, these days, she’d be called a cougar rather than a crone. Still, society decrees that a woman’s status is rarely improved by her having a much younger male partner; if anything, it’s sacrificed.


Related:

(Link):  Study:  Big Gaps in Age Can Turn A Marriage Sour in Just Six Years

(Link): Younger Women Tend To Marry Older Men in the U.S. – But That’s Finally Changing by Dan Kopf (2018 Article)

(Link): Thirty Year Old Man Likes To Date and Have Sex with 80, 90 Year Old Women

(Link): “Dear Therapist: I’m Dating a Divorced Man With Kids, and It’s Harder Than I Thought – His Ex Wife Calls Constantly” (She Needs To Dump This Guy)

(Link):  Stop Telling Women Their Most Valuable Asset Is Their Youth

(Link):  Thirty Year Old Man Likes To Date and Have Sex with 80, 90 Year Old Women

(Link): Girlfriend, 26, Chops Off Her 40 Year Old Boyfriend’s Penis With Garden Shears

(Link): Woman Burned To Death For Refusing Marriage Proposal To A Man Over Half Her Age

(Link): What Is The #HusbandNotDad (hash tag)? Down The Rabbit Hole Of An Unlikely Hashtag by P. Frank

(Link):  Dear Abby: I Gave Up Dating, and 30 Years Later, I’m Lonely – letter from self-professing 70 year old guy who is overweight, says he prefers younger women and does not want to date women his own age

(Link):  Wife’s Shock As Husband, 26, Is Caught Cheating With a 72-Year-Old Lover at Premier Inn

(Link):  ‘I Want My 2.3 Bonus Years’ – A.K.A., ‘Where do 50-year-old men get the strange impression that they could date a 23-year-old?’ by Mona Chalabi

(Link): What It’s Really Like to Be a Guy Who Only Dates Much Older Women by L. Moore 

(Link): French Author Yann Moix, 50, Says Women Over 50 Are ‘Invisible’ To Him

(Link): Men Become ‘Invisible’ And Lose Sex Appeal At 39 – Article from Daily Caller

(Link): A 69 Year Old Man Wants to Self Identify as a 40-Something to Increase His Chances on Dating Sites

(Link):  How Dating In Your 40s Is Nothing Like Dating In Your 20s – via NY Post – A Secular Editorial Grasps what Married Christian Relationship Advice Givers Do Not

(Link): Ageism Vs. Age Preferences and Creepy Older Men (critique of post at another blog) 

(Link): The Bigger the Age Gap The Shorter The Marriage  / Divorce Rates Predicted By Age Differences

(Link): Avoid Dating Divorced Guys Who Are Dating on the Rebound – and Icky May December Relationships

(Link): Obnoxious, Condescending, Sexist, Pervy Esquire Editorial by 50-Something Year Old Man: “In Praise of 42 Year Old Women” – Condescendingly Reassures 40 Something Women He’d Sex Them Up

(Link): Follow Up – Reactions by Other Writers to Sexist, Condescending 50 Something Men Who Think They Are Final Arbiters of If Women Are Attractive Past Age of 40 (Re: Esquire Editorial by Junod)

(Link): Follow Up Part 2 – Reactions by Other Writers to Sexist, Condescending 50 Something Men Who Think They Are Final Arbiters of If Women Are Attractive Past Age of 40 (Re: Esquire Editorial by Junod)

(Link): Online Dating: Women Want Younger Men (article)

(Link): Christian Males Blaming their Unwanted Protracted Singleness on Feminism – They have the wrong target

(Link): Couple Says 30-Year Age Gap Means Hotter Sex (*Barf*)

(Link): Creepizoids Weirdos and Perverts on Dating Sites

Emma Watson on Being “Self Partnered” (Single) – The Editorial Round Up

Emma Watson on Being “Self Partnered” (Single) – The Editorial Round Up

A week or two ago, movie actress Emma Watson declared herself “self partnered,” rather than use the word “single” to describe her relationship status.

Watson got some amount of confusion or ridicule for using that term. As a never-married woman, I found the term a little strange, but hey, if it works for her, fine by me.

I was engaged for several years, from my late 20s into my early 30s. My ex fiance was a self absorbed idiot. I am better off single than in a relationship with a loser like that. 

Anyway, there have been a few editorials defending Watson on this point, such as this one:

(Link): Emma Watson looked shame in the face and won

Excerpts

…”I never believed the whole ‘I’m happy single’ spiel,” she told Vogue in an interview published this week. “It took me a long time, but I’m very happy [being single]. I call it being self-partnered.”

Now anyone might be forgiven for being blindsided by the “consciously uncoupled”-esque vibe of that remark at first glance. Indeed, many outright jeered. “Self-partnering means you can’t get a bloke, right?” suggested British TV host and, we can only assume, self-appointed relationship expert Piers Morgan.

“What’s wrong with being single?” Twitter users demanded.

But isn’t that kind of the point? If society was kinder to single women, and our associations with the word “single” were generally more positive, there wouldn’t be any need for Watson to coin the phrase.

Continue reading “Emma Watson on Being “Self Partnered” (Single) – The Editorial Round Up”

Woman Almost Dies From Allergic Reaction After Sex With Husband by S. Osbourn

Woman Almost Dies From Allergic Reaction After Sex With Husband by S. Osbourn

Sometimes there are advantages and benefits to being sexually abstinent.

…And let this go to show that the Christian propaganda that marriage will lead to great, regular sex is a FALSEHOOD. Christians especially liked to emphasize that remaining a virgin until marriage leads to great, regular sex.

Well, in cases such as this one (and others I have on this blog), sometimes a person is physically incapable of having sex, because doing so is too physically painful – or impossible.

(Link): Woman Almost Dies From Allergic Reaction After Sex With Husband

Samuel Osborne, The Independent •
November 8, 2019

A woman nearly died from an allergic reaction after having sex with her husband,

The 46-year-old from Baltimore, Maryland, suffered an anaphylactic reaction to a medication her husband was taking through exposure to her husband’s semen, according to the case report in the American Journal of Medicine.

Continue reading “Woman Almost Dies From Allergic Reaction After Sex With Husband by S. Osbourn”

Boy, Age 2, Dies After Father Stole $150,000 Raised for Treatment and Blew It On Hookers, Liquor, Drugs and Hotels

Boy, Age 2, Dies After Father Stole $150,000 Raised for Treatment and Blew It On Hookers, Liquor, Drugs and Hotels

Christians (such as but not limited to Al Mohler) and my fellow conservatives often like to claim that “family values” and parenthood and marriage are all necessary to make society better, and to make people into loving, mature, godly, and/or ethical adults. But the Nuclear Family, parenthood, and marriage does none of those things. Here’s yet another example.

(Link): Boy, Age 2, Dies After Father Stole $150,000 Raised for Treatment and Blew It On Hookers, Liquor, Drugs and Hotels

Excerpts:

October 23, 2019

A toddler who suffered from a neuromuscular disorder died last week in Brazil after his father allegedly stole the cash raised for his treatment and spent it on wild parties.

Two-year-old João Miguel Alves passed away October 17 following a lengthy battle with Spinal Muscular Atrophy [AME].

His father, Mateus Henrique Leroy Alves, 37, was arrested July 22, a week after his wife reported him to the police.

He was found at a luxury hotel where he had been staying at for almost two months having spent $150,000 on designer clothes, watches, drugs, hookers and booze, local media reports.

Continue reading “Boy, Age 2, Dies After Father Stole $150,000 Raised for Treatment and Blew It On Hookers, Liquor, Drugs and Hotels”

Woman Who Has Sex With Her Husband Just Once a Year Due to Suffering Excruciating Pain During Intercourse

Woman Who Has Sex With Her Husband Just Once a Year Due to Suffering Excruciating Pain During Intercourse

This isn’t the first example on my blog of a married person incapable of having sex due to physical health problems or due to having been sexually abused prior to marriage or what have you.

A lot of Christians – usually conservative ones who have turned Marriage and The Nuclear Family into idols – wrongly promise single adults that if they wait until marriage to have sex, that the married sex they will have will be regular, hot, satisfying and wonderful.

In all my years growing up in such Christianity, I never once heard any of the preachers or Christian talking heads address issues such as what to do like the one below.

About the only time I’ve heard Christians bother to address such issues (and that’s been within the last ten or so years), they wrongly assume that only men want sex (they never address the marriages where the husband doesn’t want to have sex but the wife does).

If Christians bother to address female sexual abuse victims (who were molested as children and who are adults now) who don’t want to have married sex, their only response is to insensitively shame and pressure such women into having sex they don’t want to be having.

Because these Christians who do this – and it’s usually men – wrongly believe that all men are entitled to sex, and Christian men care more about men’s sexual desires being met than they care about ministering to wounded women.

Anyway, let this news story below go to demonstrate that being married is not a guarantee that an individual will have great, regular, wonderful sex. Sometimes the married sex is infrequent and/or it’s lousy.

(Link): Woman Who Has Sex With Her Husband Just Once a Year Due to Suffering Excruciating Pain During Intercourse

Excerpts:

October 2019

A woman who experiences excruciating pain during intercourse has revealed she only has sex with her husband once a year. 

Natalie Bricker, 35, from Newark, Delaware, was diagnosed with persistent genital arousal disorder in 2018, a condition which causes her severe pelvic pain every time she is aroused.

Continue reading “Woman Who Has Sex With Her Husband Just Once a Year Due to Suffering Excruciating Pain During Intercourse”

Don’t Let ‘Incel’ Misogynists Like the Toronto Killer Tell You They’re Special – I Was A Virgin Until I Was 27 By Noah Berlatsky

Don’t Let ‘Incel’ Misogynists Like the Toronto Killer Tell You They’re Special – I Was A Virgin Until I Was 27 By Noah Berlatsky

American society stopped “slut shaming” people for having sex outside of marriage many years ago, contrary to what the anti-sexual purity “Ex-vangelicals,” liberal Christians, Christian feminists, and other groups argue on blogs and twitter.

The trend has been the opposite in years past: adults who are celibate and single are often ridiculed or thought of as weird losers if they’re not in a romantic relationship and not having sex.

Our culture went from “Slut Shaming” years ago to “Celibate and Virgin Shaming.” (I have examples all over this blog, look for them).

Here’s an essay by a guy who didn’t lose his virginity until his late twenties. It’s another anecdotal piece of the pie demonstrating how our sex saturated culture shames people who are not having sex.

(Link): Don’t Let ‘Incel’ Misogynists Like the Toronto Killer Tell You They’re Special – I Was A Virgin Until I Was 27 

Excerpts

by Noah Berlatsky
April 2018

The man who murdered ten people in Toronto with a van, like the 2014 Isla Vista killer, considered himself an “incel,” or involuntary celibate.

Incels are men who blame the world, and especially women, for the fact that they are virgins, or aren’t having sex as often as they want.

They see women as manipulators who choose powerful but shallow men, and unfairly ignore and even torment good guys like themselves.

Resentment becomes an excuse for misogyny, and sometimes, for violence.

In the aftermath of the Toronto massacre, some people were quick to use the killer’s celibacy as an insult.

Continue reading “Don’t Let ‘Incel’ Misogynists Like the Toronto Killer Tell You They’re Special – I Was A Virgin Until I Was 27 By Noah Berlatsky”

Urgent Warning For Users of Tinder and Other Dating Apps as Rapes and Sexual Assaults Stemming From Their Use skyrocket (2019 Australia)

Urgent Warning For Users of Tinder and Other Dating Apps as Rapes and Sexual Assaults Stemming From Their Use skyrocket (2019 Australia)

(Link): Urgent Warning For Users of Tinder and Other Dating Apps as Rapes and Sexual Assaults Stemming From Their Use skyrocket (2019 Australia)

Australians who use dating apps such as Tinder have been warned about the increasing amount of sexual assaults were linked to the online service.

NSW police have confirmed one in five sexual assaults within Sydney’s party spots in the CBD, Kings Cross, Darlinghurst and Newtown happened after an arrangement to meet through a dating app.

Continue reading “Urgent Warning For Users of Tinder and Other Dating Apps as Rapes and Sexual Assaults Stemming From Their Use skyrocket (2019 Australia)”

Okla. Dad Molested and Killed Ex-Cheerleader Daughter, Then Claimed She Shot Herself by Accident

Okla. Dad Molested and Killed Ex-Cheerleader Daughter, Then Claimed She Shot Herself by Accident

Did being a father and being married make this man in this news story “more of a human,” as Southern Baptist (Link): Al Mohler would argue?

Did being a parent make this man more godly, mature, ethical or sexually moral, as so many conservative pro-family think tanks would want you to believe?

After seeing news stories like this one, do you really think God withholds spouses from people until they become more righteous, loving, or less sinful, as a lot of conservative Protestants and Baptists teach? I’d say “no.”

(Link): Okla. Dad Molested and Killed Ex-Cheerleader Daughter, Then Claimed She Shot Herself by Accident

On Wednesday, jurors in Oklahoma convicted a 45-year-old father in the 2017 death of his ex-cheerleader daughter, whom he’d initially claimed accidentally shot herself in the face.

A Cleveland County Court official tells PEOPLE the jury deliberated for nearly four hours before returning the guilty verdict against Ronald Lee McMullen Jr., of Norman, of the first-degree murder of 22-year-old Kailee McMullen.

Continue reading “Okla. Dad Molested and Killed Ex-Cheerleader Daughter, Then Claimed She Shot Herself by Accident”

Dear Advice Columnist: ‘I am fed up with never having had a girlfriend and being a Virgin at 34’

Dear Advice Columnist: ‘I am fed up with never having had a girlfriend and being a Virgin at 34’

(Link): Dear Advice Columnist: ‘I am fed up with never having had a girlfriend and being a virgin at 34’ 

DEAR DEIDRE: SIMPLY put, I am fed up with never having had a girlfriend and being a virgin at 34.

I am a big guy, 6ft 6in and with a large build and I find it almost impossible to meet women who want more than just friendship.

Continue reading “Dear Advice Columnist: ‘I am fed up with never having had a girlfriend and being a Virgin at 34’”

Employer Is Liable For Worker’s Death After Sex on Business Trip: French Court

Employer Is Liable For Worker’s Death After Sex on Business Trip: French Court by D. Matthews

(Link): Employer Is Liable For Worker’s Death After Sex on Business Trip: French Court

A French court ruling set a new precedent for employer liability for accidents during business trips after ruling that a railway construction company was responsible for its employee who died after having sex on a business trip.

A man identified only as Xavier in court documents died of a heart attack at the home of a woman with whom he had just had sex, ABC News reported.

Continue reading “Employer Is Liable For Worker’s Death After Sex on Business Trip: French Court”

Sex-Mad Americans Are the Most Unfaithful Spouses in the World by M. Hodge

Sex-Mad Americans Are The Most Unfaithful Spouses In The World by M. Hodge

But conservative Christians and conservative think tanks who have turned the Nuclear Family and Marriage into Idols they worship insist that Marriage is Good for society.

They also keep insisting that Marriage makes adults more godly, mature, empathetic, responsible, and sexually ethical.

But look here, according to this article, married American couples lead the world in the amount of extra-marital nooky on an adultery site.

So much for marriage making society better and causing adults to be sexually pure, mature, godly, empathetic, or ethical.

(Link): Sex-Mad Americans Are The Most Unfaithful Spouses In The World 

by M. Hodge 
Sept 2019

THE US has the most unfaithful spouses in the WORLD with over 25 million sex-mad citizens using cheating website Ashley Madison.

The infamous adultery site, which hit the headlines in 2015 after a massive data leak, has shared some startling statistics with Sun Online.

The dating site, whose motto is ‘Life is short. Have an affair’, says that a whopping 25.5m Americans have used their service since its launch in 2002. 

In fact, the US has more than double the cheaters than second place Brazil – with has 10.3m Madison users – and more than the next eight countries put together.

 Christoph Kraemer, an Ashley Madison Managing Director, told Sun Online why he believes the firm’s platform is so popular with yanks.

He said: “We find that in countries where they are a lot of social norms such as lots of traditional views on relationship and marriage – we tend to particularly well. “In those kinds of societies, quite often people are left feeling trapped in their relationships.

Continue reading “Sex-Mad Americans Are the Most Unfaithful Spouses in the World by M. Hodge”

Single. Dating. Female. Pastor: 5 Things I Want the Church to Know

Single. Dating. Female. Pastor: 5 Things I Want the Church to Know

Some of what the author writes in this is applicable to all single women, not just to women who work as pastors.

(Link): Single. Dating. Female. Pastor: 5 Things I Want the Church to Know 

Excerpts:

Recently, I was invited to participate in a panel on singleness at a Christian conference. I shared my experience as a single woman pastor and how single clergy can feel isolated in a church culture where marriage is the default.

It was the first time since university that I had an honest, direct, public conversation about singleness in the church.

We hear countless sermons about marriage, but singleness is not often addressed publicly in Christian communities.

1. Single pastors (especially women) often feel invisible. Let’s find ways to be more inclusive of the stories and experiences of single folks in ministry. 

Continue reading “Single. Dating. Female. Pastor: 5 Things I Want the Church to Know”

‘I Hate Dating Apps So Much!’ By Heather Havrilesky

‘I Hate Dating Apps So Much!’ By Heather Havrilesky

(Link): ‘I Hate Dating Apps So Much!’ By Heather Havrilesky

Dear Polly,

I’m a huge fan, and I’m so grateful for your writing. There is one area, however, where I think you may have a blind spot, and that is the absolutely terrible plight of trying to find love on dating apps.

Your general advice about the pursuit of love always resonates:
Build a life alone that you love; hold onto your belief that love exists even when it makes you feel vulnerable and uncool; if you meet someone you think you like but they’re tepid or not fully invested, go ahead and tell them to fuck off.

I now read this and think, “Yep, got it, great advice, duly noted.”

My execution is sometimes imperfect, but I remain fully convinced that you are right about these things.

However, that belief doesn’t change the day-to-day, grueling nature of what “being open to love” in 2019 entails.

I am 35 years old, and I have been on and off dating websites or apps for almost a decade.

During that time, I’ve met a very small handful of people I ended up caring deeply for, or felt I could deeply care for, but for various reasons it has never worked out.

Continue reading “‘I Hate Dating Apps So Much!’ By Heather Havrilesky”

Married Mother and Lawyer Reveals She Works As A Part-Time Prostitute

Married Mother and Lawyer Reveals She Works As A Part-Time Prostitute
 
A lot of Christians falsely promise that marriage will make a person more godly, mature, ethical, and responsible.
 
A lot of them also said in their teachings – at least when I was a teen and in my twenties – that if one remained a virgin until marriage, that the married sex would be frequent and excellent.
 
But here is a news story about a married woman (who is also a mother), works as a lawyer, yet she also spends part of her time getting paid to have sex with other people. Did being married and a parent make her more sexually ethical? Nope.
 
 
 
 

Married Mother and Lawyer Reveals She Works As A Part-Time Prostitute

Christians will falsely teach people that being married will make them become more godly and mature, and as they will supposedly be getting plenty or regular, great sex with a spouse, they’ll never commit adultery or other sexual sin ever.

At least, I was exposed to this sort of teaching from Protestant and Baptist sources when I was a kid, teen and twenty something.

But as we can see via this news story below – and stories like this one – no, it’s not true. 

Marriage and motherhood did not cause this woman to be more godly or mature, nor did married sex keep her from having sex with other people – and getting paid for it.

(Like): ‘Sex is fun, and I can get paid for it’: Married mother and lawyer reveals she works as a part-time PROSTITUTE and once made $55,000 at a brothel in Nevada in just THREE WEEKS

A criminal defense lawyer has opened up about her life as a part-time prostitute, revealing she once made a whopping $55,000 in just three weeks.  

Katherine Sears, a married mother of one from Des Moines, Iowa, started working as a prostitute three years ago at the age of 27. With her husband John Sears’ approval, she spends three weeks at a time working at a brothel in Nevada, where prostitution is legal.  

‘I like sex. Sex is fun, and I can get paid for it,’ she told KCCI of her side hustle, which she hopes to help decriminalize by sharing her story. 

Continue reading “Married Mother and Lawyer Reveals She Works As A Part-Time Prostitute”

‘My Wife and I Had Great Sex For 45 Years, But Now I’d Like to Sleep With Men’ – So Hetero Marriage is Responsible For Creating More Homosexuality

‘My Wife and I Had Great Sex For 45 Years, But Now I’d Like to Sleep With Men’ – So Hetero Marriage is Responsible For Creating More Homosexuality

Obviously, a lot of conservative Protestant, Baptist, and evangelical and secular conservative talking points and propaganda about the nuclear family and marriage are not truthful or accurate.

Here we have a married guy who has been married to a woman for 45 years, but now, he’d like to have sex with men (see link/letter much farther below).

Your average conservative Christian would have you believe that marriage makes people more godly, mature, and ethical.

Those marriage and nuclear family conservative and Christian advocates would have you believe that once you marry (they always assume you will marry, they usually take no notice of adults who remain single over the age of 30), that you’ll be having sex with your spouse, and that the married hetero sex you have will be regular and of great quality.

Obviously, this man being discussed below who is married to a woman didn’t make him any less reluctant or less interested in having sex with other men.

It’s become apparent with each year I get older and see more and more news stories and advice columns like this one, that being married is not, contrary to what most Christians teach and believe, a guarantee for sexual satisfaction in life, nor does it guarantee happiness or make a person better or more godly, responsible, or mature.

It’s also evident that Marriage and The Family are not going to fix the culture, as so many talking Christian heads keep arguing.

And, another kicker that I find even more annoying and amusing in light of this article / advice column below:
A few years ago, I saw an editorial or two where the conservative or Christian authors were blaming heterosexual single adults for the seeming proliferation of homosexuals in our culture, or for the widespread acceptance of homosexuality.

Those conservative commentators were trying to blame Hetero singles (yes, heterosexuals) for homosexuality becoming more commonplace in the USA. (You can read one of those posts (Link): here.)

But here we have a letter from a Hetero married guy who wants to be Homosexual. This is not an un-married man. He is not already homosexual. He was married TO A WOMAN and yet STILL wants to engage in homosexual sex acts.

Obviously, adult singles of the Hetero (or Homo) variety did not “cause” this guy to go LGBT – he’s already married to a woman and by his own account had been having hetero married sex for 45 years… and yet, he wants to have sex with other men. Singleness and single adults can in no way be blamed for this.

(Link): My Wife and I Had Great Sex For 45 Years, But Now I’d Like to Sleep With Men

By STOYA and RICH JUZWIAK
SEPT 05, 2019

Dear How to Do It,

I am a 68-year-old man who has been married to a woman for 45 years, with three grown kids.

Over the course of our marriage, we have been very active sexually, but for various reasons over the past five or six years, our sexual activity has declined dramatically.

Continue reading “‘My Wife and I Had Great Sex For 45 Years, But Now I’d Like to Sleep With Men’ – So Hetero Marriage is Responsible For Creating More Homosexuality”

What’s Causing Women To Join the No Fap Movement?

What’s Causing Women To Join the No Fap Movement?

(Link): What’s Causing Women To Join the No Fap Movement?

Excerpts:

A Reddit forum dedicated to abstaining from masturbation has over 450,000 members – and about 5% of them are female

by Katie Bishop
Sept 2019

…Kristel is a follower of (Link): NoFap, a platform that encourages its users to refrain from masturbation. She claims her new lifestyle has led to a complete physical and mental reformation.

“After starting NoFap I felt more motivation, more willpower and more discipline,” Kristel tells me. “I decided to take part in the movement because I like challenging myself and I wanted to prove that I could accomplish this.”

The flippantly named NoFap community has gained a strange prominence since it was founded in 2011 by Pittsburgh web developer Alexander Rhodes.

Inspired by a small study that suggested that male testosterone levels rose after seven days of abstinence from ejaculation, followers avoid masturbation in order to “reboot” their brains.

Having first gained momentum among men in Reddit forums and backwaters of the internet, the community regards NoFap as a sexual health program to combat porn addiction.

Continue reading “What’s Causing Women To Join the No Fap Movement?”

Alton Brown Opens Up About His 2015 Divorce and Leaving the Southern Baptist Church

Alton Brown Opens Up About His 2015 Divorce and Leaving the Southern Baptist Church 

(Link): Alton Brown Opens Up About His 2015 Divorce and Leaving the Southern Baptist Church

Alton Brown has come a long way since his 2015 divorce.

In the latest issue of PEOPLE, on news stands Friday, the Good Eats star opens up about his split from ex-wife DeAnna Brown for the first time.

“We really went separate ways in our lives,” he says. “We changed, the world changed, and she went one way and I went the other way. I think we’re probably both a heck of a lot better off where we are.”

Continue reading “Alton Brown Opens Up About His 2015 Divorce and Leaving the Southern Baptist Church”

Dear Therapist: It’s Hard to Accept Being Single by L. Gottlieb

Dear Therapist: It’s Hard to Accept Being Single by L. Gottlieb

Oh yes, I’ve been through this (what this advice columnists discusses below).

I’m the single lady who has had to sit and endure listening to women friends in relationships either bitch, moan, and gripe about their husbands or boyfriends every time they phone me or meet me in person, or they forever gush about how great and romantic their husband or boyfriend is.  And both scenarios are horrible.

Either way you look at it, it’s unbearable as a single woman who wants to be married to have to sit and listen to some married cow  (or cow with a boyfriend) either brag about how great her man is, or complain about how thoughtless, stupid, mean, or selfish he is. Neither scenario is a win for the single woman who wants to have a boyfriend or husband but can’t get one.

In the last few years, I’ve personally come to terms more with being single in spite of having wanted to be married, but I remember the long years of what it felt like to listen to married women friends (or friends with boyfriends) complain incessantly about their significant other. It felt terrible.

With a few of them, I did speak up and remind them I’d like to be married, that I wish I had a husband to complain about like they did (or conversely, I’d drop hints that me listening to them gush excitedly about their upcoming wedding was hard for me to listen to, since I was single, lonely, and I had no wedding in my future).

The only thing I ever got out of these women was a “deer in the headlight” look – it didn’t compute with these insensitive, self absorbed dolts that they should neither excessively or frequently complain nor excessively or frequently gush about their husbands to a woman friend of theirs who was single and didn’t like being single. Didn’t compute with these self obsessed idiots.

They’d just stare at me oddly as though they didn’t understand what I was conveying, and they would then prattle on more, complaining (or praising) their husband or boyfriend.

A message here to married women and women with boyfriends: your single women friends who are single and who hate being single do NOT want to listen to you go on and on about your man, your relationship, your wedding, your anniversary, etc, whether it is positive or negative. Please keep it to yourself – at the least, keep it brief and infrequent.

(Now that I’ve been on better terms with my single status, no, I still don’t like listening to women friends endlessly go on and on about their boyfriends and husbands. I get bored, and I find these women to be very self absorbed, they seldom take an interest in me or my life.)

Also, message here for the married ladies (or women with boyfriends): stop USING your single lady friends.

You married women (or women with boyfriends) only phone or want to hang out with us single ladies when your husband (or boyfriend) is out of town for his job, or you’re in a nasty fight with him, so you call us up, you call up your Single Lady Friends, to talk to us, or to hang out with us.

But the minute your man gets back in town, or you patch things up, you drop us single lady friends like hot potatoes. You are using your single women friends, which is not okay, you shallow, selfish cow. Stop it.

(Link): Dear Therapist: It’s Hard to Accept Being Single

Listening to my friends talk about their relationship problems is getting really tough.

LORI GOTTLIEB
JUN 3, 2019

Dear Therapist,

How do I tell my friends I really don’t want to hear about the problems they are having in their relationships? It is really hard for me to listen to them complain about their spouses or significant others when I am fighting hard to accept being single.

Continue reading “Dear Therapist: It’s Hard to Accept Being Single by L. Gottlieb”