Why Are Young People Having So Little Sex? America is in a Sex Recession – by K. Jullian

Why Are Young People Having So Little Sex? America is in a Sex Recession –  by K. Jullian – via The Atlantic

(Link): Why Are Young People Having So Little Sex? America is in a Sex Recession – via The Atlantic

These should be boom times for sex.

The share of Americans who say sex between unmarried adults is “not wrong at all” is at an all-time high. New cases of HIV are at an all-time low. Most women can—at last—get birth control for free, and the morning-after pill without a prescription.

If hookups are your thing, Grindr and Tinder offer the prospect of casual sex within the hour. The phrase If something exists, there is porn of it used to be a clever internet meme; now it’s a truism.

BDSM plays at the local multiplex—but why bother going? Sex is portrayed, often graphically and sometimes gorgeously, on prime-time cable. Sexting is, statistically speaking, normal.

…But despite all this, American teenagers and young adults are having less sex.

To the relief of many parents, educators, and clergy members who care about the health and well-being of young people, (Link):teens are launching their sex lives later 

…Over the past few years, Jean M. Twenge, a psychology professor at San Diego State University, has published research exploring how and why Americans’ sex lives may be ebbing.

Continue reading “Why Are Young People Having So Little Sex? America is in a Sex Recession – by K. Jullian”

Ex-Evangelicals Admit Their Religion Killed Their Love Lives: I’m ‘Literally Thinking About Hell’ During Sex

Ex-Evangelicals Admit Their Religion Killed Their Love Lives: I’m ‘Literally Thinking About Hell’ During Sex

(Link): Ex-Evangelicals Admit Their Religion Killed Their Love Lives: I’m ‘Literally Thinking About Hell’ During Sex – Raw Story Site

(Link):  ANONYMOUS EX-CHRISTIANS OPEN UP ABOUT THEIR DAMAGED SEX LIVES

Excerpts from Raw Story site:

In a confessional piece on The Feed, ex-evangelicals lamented the oppressive influence their faith had on their sex lives and personal relationships with their partners, saying they were haunted by feelings of guilt and shame.

As pointed out by Hemant Mehta at the Friendly Atheist, former fundamentalist Christian Ruby Bisson (Claire) who writes about Christianity at The Gravity of Guilt, has been compiling stories told her by her readers who detailed not only how their deeply-held religious beliefs crippled their sex lives, but the lingering effects after they lost their religion.

According to one anonymous woman, “I can’t orgasm because I can’t relax. I’m literally thinking about hell. It’s been three years since I left Christianity but I can’t shake the thought that a guy who isn’t a Christian just wants me for my bod and I project that insecurity onto him. This is ultimately what ended my only two relationships.”

She then admitted how she tried to make it work.

“I made him pretend he was religious and didn’t want to have sex,” she explained. “I had to convince him it was a good idea. I made him pray at the end of the bed. Through that role play I was able to be the other person and that power allowed me not to freak out.”

Another former Christain said that she spiraled into a world of pornography at the age of 12, that left her secretly living in “shame and self-hatred.”

Continue reading “Ex-Evangelicals Admit Their Religion Killed Their Love Lives: I’m ‘Literally Thinking About Hell’ During Sex”

What It’s Like To Date As A 30-Something Virgin by B. Wong

(Link): What It’s Like To Date As A 30-Something Virgin

Excerpts:

October 2018

by B. Wong
“You can go without sex. That’s much less of a problem than going through life alone, and without affection.”

It’s Not You, It’s Me is a series that looks at dating in America from the perspective of different ethnicities, sexual identities, life experiences and circumstances.

Forget butt play or the pull-out method: The latest trend in sex might be forgoing it altogether.

According to a recent study out of University College London, millennials are waiting longer to have sex than members of previous generations, with 12.5 percent of them abstaining until age 26.

But some wait even longer than that. We recently talked to three people who have remained virgins well into their 30s — one by choice, the other two by happenstance. Below, they tell us more about how they’ve remained abstinent this long and what it’s like to date when you’ve never had sex.

Responses have been edited for clarity and style, with last names withheld for privacy.

People remain virgins for so many different reasons. For you, was it an intentional choice to abstain from sex?

Brianna, a 35-year-old programmer from Indianapolis, Indiana:

My reasons are a bit of a mixed bag.

I was raised very conservatively and was told that sex before marriage was a sin, so that kept me a virgin for a while. Then, when I outgrew that thinking, it was a matter of waiting to find someone I felt comfortable enough with to consider that next step.

It just hasn’t happened. I date and have had a couple of relationships get as far as three months or so, but no one long term. So, I’m still a virgin.

Matt, a tech industry worker in his mid-30s who lives in Lansing, Michigan:

I grew up with fairly severe social anxiety, which I’ve never completely overcome. I had some early rejections in late high school and early college that completely ruined what self-esteem I had.

Continue reading “What It’s Like To Date As A 30-Something Virgin by B. Wong”

Supreme Court Nominee Kavanaugh and Virginity

Supreme Court Nominee Kavanaugh and Virginity

So, Brett Kavanaugh is Trump’s nominee for Supreme Court Justice.

Apparently Democrats leaked the personal information of Dr. Christine Ford, who claims that when younger, Kavanaugh pushed her on to a bed, put his hand over her mouth, and was attempting to undress her.

It was either Ford or another woman who knew Kavanaugh when he was a teen or young 20-something who claims Kavanaugh exposed his genitals to her.

Kavanaugh was called before a Senate committee last week (great parody (Link): here)

Anyway – I was raised in the Christian faith, and partly due to that and Christian sexual ethics teachings – which stress that sex outside of marriage is sin – I’ve yet to have sex, I am still a virgin, as I’ve never married. I’m in my 40s.

One thing I’ve noticed is that not only does a large swath of secular culture mock sexually abstinent people, but so too does Christian culture and conservatives.

Your average liberal or feminist wants culture to respect any and all sexual actions and choices, yet, they will mock adults who are celibate or are virgins (I have examples of this on previous post on this blog).

Christians and conservatives frequently mock or warn about sexual promiscuity, they like to shame women who have children outside of wedlock., and yet, Christians and conservatives also are un-supportive or adults past the age of 29 who are sexually abstaining.

Yes, Christians and some conservatives will SAY that they respect adult virginity, but in truth, they do not. Some of them openly mock or ridicule anyone who is chaste and/or single past the age of 25, while some of their other attitudes of sex – such as a very “easy forgivism” attitude in regards to fornication or an assumption that every unmarried adult page age 18 is sexually active – belie and contradict their so-called respect for chastity.

So, one topic of several I’ve blogged about here regularly for the last few years have been virginity and celibacy.

I’d say many people in American culture would define or understand virginity, in the context of hetero relationships, to say that one “loses one’s virginity” if one engages in penis- in- the- vagina (or anus) physical contact.

(That’s pretty much my understanding of the word and concept, as well.)

Brett Kavanaugh was defending himself by saying that he was a virgin through high school and during part (or all?) or his college years.

Being a virgin does not prohibit or preclude a man from doing the things Kavanaugh was accused of, such as allegedly exposing his penis to one young lady, and pushing another woman down on a bed and attempting to remove her clothing without her consent.

A virgin can, in fact, expose him or herself and still technically remain a virgin.

A virgin can pin a woman down to a bed, cover her mouth, and paw at her clothing and still remain a virgin, if one understands “virgin” to mean “no penis in a vagina and/or anus” definition.

I notice that nobody in our culture values or respects virginity unless it can “come in handy” like in this very specific case where Kavanaugh is trying to depict himself as an innocent choir boy who was incapable of groping women or exposing himself, all because he never went “all the way.”

Some of the attitudes that secular society has against virginity, which the author, Creech, outlines below in his piece I have copied, are also the same in much of the Christian community, and among secular conservatives.

As I have noted elsewhere on my blog, in blog posts now a few years old, there are well-known Christians, some are pastors, some are book authors and bloggers, who also doubt that anyone can remain a virgin past the age of 18 or 29.

Many Christians and conservatives believe, to use one phrase I’ve seen them use in discussing this subject, that it takes a “Herculean effort” to remain a virgin past one’s twenties.

Yet other Christians assume, quite wrongly, that if someone is a virgin past the age of 18 (or 29), it must be because that person lacks a libido, and/or that God “gifted them with celibacy,” and that God also supernaturally empowers that person to resist having sexual relations – all of which is false.

God does not “gift” anyone with celibacy, or with a supernatural ability to resist sex. The reasons why a person is able to maintain celibacy comes down to self-control, choice, and personal conviction, and it’s something that everyone can accomplish, but most do not want to, because they are too selfish or lazy.

It’s easier for the Christian fornicators out there to assume that anyone who didn’t fornicate like they did must be especially exceptional in some regard, as in, God waved a magic wand and gave that person some super ability to resist sexual temptation, or God removed all sexual desire from the person.

(Link):  Kavanaugh’s ‘Virgin Defense’

By Christian Post Columnist, Rev. Mark H. Creech

 1 Oct 2018

In reference to the allegations of sexual assault against him, Judge Brett Kavanaugh said in an interview with Fox News’ Martha McCallum, “I did not have sexual intercourse or anything close to sexual intercourse in high school or many years thereafter.”

“So you are saying that through all these years in question that you were a virgin?” asked McCallum. “That’s correct,” said Kavanaugh.

Kavanaugh also referenced the same during his latest testimony before the Senate Judiciary Committee on Thursday, saying his abstinence from sex during those years was a matter of “faith, respect, and caution.”

Some now are calling this “The Virgin Defense” and find Kavanaugh’s claim highly suspect and worthy of ridicule.

Continue reading “Supreme Court Nominee Kavanaugh and Virginity”

Man With Bionic Penis Rushed to Hospital After Having Sex For the First Time

Man With Bionic Penis Rushed to Hospital After Having Sex For the First Time

(Link): Man With Bionic Penis Rushed to Hospital After Having Sex For the First Time

Excerpts:

Andrew Wardle, 45, from Manchester, was found on the floor at home just days after having sex

Sept 2018

A MAN who was fitted with a £50,000 bionic willy collapsed and was hospitalised just days after having sex for the first time.

Andrew Wardle, 45, was born without a penis and surgeons created the organ using skin from his arm before attaching it during a 10-hour operation.

Continue reading “Man With Bionic Penis Rushed to Hospital After Having Sex For the First Time”

Scientists Shocked by Stingray’s Spectacular Virgin Birth

(Link): Scientists Shocked by Stingray’s Spectacular Virgin Birth

Excerpts:

In a shocking scientific discovery, a female eagle ray has given birth without having contact with a male for nine years.

We repeat, nine years. That’s not a typo.

Sea Life Sydney Aquarium staff have been shocked by the birth of Ani in a rare cloning process called parthenogenesis.

Continue reading “Scientists Shocked by Stingray’s Spectacular Virgin Birth”

‘Bachelorette’ Star Shamed For His Virginity Defends Himself

‘Bachelorette’ Star Shamed For His Virginity Defends Himself

Yeah, see, both secular and (Link): Christian culture mocks, de-values, and shames virginity, celibacy, as well as virgin and celibate people.

So, when I see some Christians or (Link): secular feminists rattling on and on about how society supposedly “slut shames” all women for their sexual behavior, I’m not so sure.

Society has even become a tad more tolerant towards asexual adults.

But God help you if you’re an adult who has voluntarily chosen to sexually abstain for whatever the reason, then both secular and Christian culture will mock you, question you, suspect there’s something weird or freaky or repressed about you.

And, people who do sexually abstain are expected to tolerate and accept any and all sexual behavior by others – we’re supposed to be non-judgmental about people who have a lot of casual sex, or who engage in homosexual behavior, or what have you. But no such tolerance is shown to adult virgins or celibates.

This guy should not be shamed for being a virgin.

He should not have to “defend” himself over this.

All you people out there who may be mocking or insulting this guy for his sexuality status can go get bent.

(Link): ‘Bachelorette’ Star Shamed For His Virginity Defends Himself

Colton Underwood, a 26-year-old retired NFL player and ex-boyfriend of Olympian Aly Raisman, has been in the spotlight on the most recent season of the Bachelorette for being the one out-and-proud virgin on the show, and has gotten quite a bit of flack for it.

During Monday night’s “Men tell All” episode, some of the other guys had some particularly nasty comments regarding Underwood’s virginity.

Continue reading “‘Bachelorette’ Star Shamed For His Virginity Defends Himself”

The Good News About Our Longings: Sexuality and Spirituality by R. Villados

I suppose in some ways this is an okay article.

The guy who wrote it is kind of doing a take on some book or article he read about how Christians should approach sexuality, which is all well and good, but the article basically concludes by saying the solution for the chaste is to view Christianity as a “banquet.”

I know you’re randy and want to have actual sex with an actual person, but just think about how great Jesus is and that will take care of it, seems to be the conclusion.

I’ve seen this approach before to this issue by other Christians, but it does not satisfy me. It spiritualizes away a primal, very real and physical desire.

Telling me to imagine pretty sun sets if I have a craving for a piece of lasagna is not going to help me want the lasagna less.

(Link): The Good News About Our Longings: Sexuality and Spirituality by R. Villados

Excerpts

…At the core of this interplay between sexuality and spirituality is desire and longing.

What we do with our sexual desires and longings says a lot about what we believe about God. Which is why we need to clearly define terms.

…Defining spirituality and sexuality can seem like a daunting task because there’s lots of confusion with these words, so in offering a simple way forward, I have found Deb Hirsch’s definitions (found in her book, Redeeming Sex) instructive.

Continue reading “The Good News About Our Longings: Sexuality and Spirituality by R. Villados”

The Unfortunate Anti-Virginity Fall-Out from Christian Misogynist Lori Alexander’s Wacky “Debt Free Virgins Without Tattoos” Post – The Problem is Not Supporting Virginity, It’s Complementarianism

The Unfortunate Anti-Virginity Fall-Out from Christian Misogynist Lori Alexander’s  Wacky “Debt Free Virgins Without Tattoos” Post – The Problem is Not Supporting Virginity, It’s Complementarianism

Updated:

Lori Alexander has posted this (unhelpful) clarification of her post (about “Debt Free Virgins with Tattoos”) on an ultra-conservative political forum:

(Link): Godly Men Prefer Debt Free Virgins Without Tattoos – by Lori Alexander, on Free Republic

Her new aspect is to add the word “Godly” prior to the word “Men,” as if that makes it less obnoxious or wrong, but it does not.

I used to lurk at the Free Republic site, back in my more conservative days, but I’m not surprised to see most of the posters under Alexander’s post on that site actually agreeing with it.

Of course they do.

I’m still a conservative, but I’m no longer off the reservation about it, as the Freepers are on some things, like on this topic.


The Unfortunate Anti- Virginity Fall Out Due to Lori Alexander’s “Debt Free Virgin” Post

If you’d like more background to this post, and an explanation for who Lori Alexander is, please see my previous post about it here:

(Link): Reflections On Lori Alexander’s Debt Free Virgins Without Tattoos

If you are new to my blog, a recap:

I am over 45 years of age and still a virgin.

I was reserving sexual activity for marriage. I’ve never had sexual intercourse. I was expecting to be married but never found Mr. Right.

I do have a libido.

Contrary to what Christians ASSUME about older virgins, Celibacy, being sexually abstinent for as long as I’ve been, is not “a gift” where God granted it to me and supernaturally removed my libido and makes it easy-breezy to cope with.

For many years, I was dedicated to remaining a virgin until marriage, due to Christian ethics, (these days I’m semi-agnostic), but also due to other reasons as well, which I shall not get into here but have explained in older posts on the blog.

In the last ten or so years, I’ve seen a disturbing trend where secular, liberal feminist views about sex have trickled into liberal Christian corners, where there is much railing against “slut shaming” and there is strong opposition to judging any woman for her sexual behavior or choices.

This trend became so common that these same views, disturbingly, began appearing on liberal Christian blogs and sites, whose progressive, feminist, Christian authors began writing editorials saying virginity is of no import, God only cares about your heart and spiritual purity, and God does not care so much anyone’s sexual behavior, (Link): intact hymen, or sexual past.

This anti- sexual purity thinking (which includes the down-playing, condemning, or mocking of physical virginity and adult celibacy) has even crept into mainstream moderate- to- conservative churches and Christian writing and thinking, unfortunately.

Continue reading “The Unfortunate Anti-Virginity Fall-Out from Christian Misogynist Lori Alexander’s Wacky “Debt Free Virgins Without Tattoos” Post – The Problem is Not Supporting Virginity, It’s Complementarianism”

Reflections On Lori Alexander’s Debt Free Virgins Without Tattoos (post updated)

Reflections On Lori Alexander’s Debt Free Virgins Without Tattoos

(Post updated below.)


I used to be a gender complementarian, and I wrote about that in (Link): this post.  I rejected complementarianism many years ago.

Lori Alexander is an extremist Christian gender complementarian (some may consider her more of a patriarchalist, I suppose) who has a Facebook group and a blog called “The Transformed Wife,” where she dispenses what many consider to be extremely toxic, harmful, and sexist advice to women, which makes most women want to gag or vomit.

Lori Alexander recently wrote a post called something like, “[Men Find] Debt Free Virgins Without Tattoos [More Attractive].”

If you are new to my blog, a little about myself, so you can see my qualifications for addressing Mrs. Alexander’s commentary:

I was a conservative Christian for many years and a gender complementarian until around the age of 35. I am currently between the ages of 45 and 50 and am still a virgin (that’s right, I’ve never had sex, not even when I was a college student).

I was committed to the idea of waiting until marriage to have sex, and I never found “Mr. Right,” ergo, I never had sex.

I attended college, which my father paid for (thanks, dad!), so I never had any student debt.

I have a college degree.

I’ve never had any tattoos. I’ve also never drank alcohol, smoked, or abused drugs.

Someone on Twitter posted (Link): these screen captures of posts by Lori Alexander. In those screen caps, Alexander is recorded as writing the following (which I will critique below):

By Lori Alexander (“The Transformed Wife”)

Do you know how much more attractive debt-free virgins (without tattoos) are to young men?

Unfortunately, there are so few of these types of young women anymore because of the high costs of college (debt) and sexual promiscuity even within those in the church. [snip URL Alexander cites to her blog post on this subject]

— end Lori Alexander quotes–

A summary of my conclusions and opinions on this matter:
Mrs. Alexander, you are simply incorrect. I am a virgin, I don’t have any tattoos,  I have no debt, for many years I was the epitome of the good, godly, sweet, demure, lady-like complementarian, I’ve never identified as feminist – but none of that enabled me to catch a husband, Christian or otherwise. I remain single past the age of 45.

There are no guarantees that a woman will gain a spouse if only she follows a certain set of dating advice or rules, such as… prays for a spouse, “trusts the Lord” for a spouse, follows complementarian teachings, refrains from attending college, or refrains from receiving a tattoo or dabbling in feminism.

Continue reading “Reflections On Lori Alexander’s Debt Free Virgins Without Tattoos (post updated)”

More Women Looking to Become ‘Consecrated Virgins’ Vatican Says

More Women Looking to Become ‘Consecrated Virgins’ Vatican Says

(Link): More Women Looking to Become ‘Consecrated Virgins’ Vatican Says

There has been ‘rapid’ growth in interest in taking vows of lifelong celibacy, Catholic Church says

by Chris Baynes

An increasing number Catholic women are taking life-longchastity vows in order to “dedicate themselves” to God, according to the Vatican.

The Holy See has issued new guidance on consecrated virginity in response to growing interest across the world in the little-known spiritual “vocation”.

Continue reading “More Women Looking to Become ‘Consecrated Virgins’ Vatican Says”

You Tube Host Explains Why She’s Waiting Until Marriage to Have Sex

You Tube Host Explains Why She’s Waiting Until Marriage to Have Sex

(Link): You Tube Host Explains Why She’s Waiting Until Mariage to Have Sex

She thinks abstinence protects you physically and emotionally

A YouTube blogger has posted a video to her thousands of followers explaining why she will not have sex until her wedding night – and wants to encourage other women who are contemplating doing the same.

Courtney Raine, a 21-year-old model and blogger, discussed the topic of abstinence on YouTube in her video titled: “UNSPOKEN Truth About Waiting Until Marriage,” which has been viewed more than 92,000 times.

Continue reading “You Tube Host Explains Why She’s Waiting Until Marriage to Have Sex”

Tinder Murder: Boxer Killed and Dismembered Date Because She Lied About Being A Virgin

Tinder Murder: Boxer Killed and Dismembered Date Because She Lied About Being A Virgin

What a nut.

(Link): Tinder Murder: Boxer Killed and Dismembered Date Because She Liked About Being A Virgin

May 2018

Gary Chu is believed to have killed Yee-min Huang after the pair met on the dating app – before going on to kill himself.

Detectives said Chu, 28, is believed to have murdered her in a jealous rage after finding out she was not a virgin.

Officers also suspect Huang, 27, had been cheating on him at the time of the killing.

Continue reading “Tinder Murder: Boxer Killed and Dismembered Date Because She Lied About Being A Virgin”

Millennial Explains Why She’s Still A Virgin at 27 Years Old: “It’s Partly Circumstance, It’s Partly Choice’

Millennial Explains Why She’s Still A Virgin at 27 Years Old: “It’s Partly Circumstance, It’s Partly Choice’

(Link):  Millennial Explains Why She’s Still A Virgin at 27 Years Old: “It’s Partly Circumstance, It’s Partly Choice’

Some of my comments about that article:

I don’t agree with all the views of the woman named Kenney who is quoted in this. Kenney wrongly assumes that being a virgin, or choosing to be one due to religious reasons or what have you, makes you repressed, or she assumes you have been brain-washed by the patriarchy.

The article makes a point that people who read about her story on social media were “divided” about it.

If people are touchy about virginity and celibacy it’s because most of the culture is extremely sexualized, puts far too much weight on sex, assumes that having sex is necessary to be “normal” or to be mature. Further, any and all forms of sexual acts have been normalized by broader culture now to the point that anyone who chooses not to partake in the hedonistic sexual free-for-all is thought to be a weirdo, loser, or wet blanket.

I’m expect to support and respect the behavior of people who have kinky sex, homosexual sex, promiscuous sex, etc and what all, but all the people who demand me expect that refuse to respect adult virginity or adult celibacy.

Millennial Explains Why She’s Still A Virgin at 27 Years Old: “It’s Partly Circumstance, It’s Partly Choice’

Excerpts:

“I think it’s partly circumstance and partly choice,” she told hosts Holly Willoughby and Phillip Schofield.

“I think when it comes to losing your virginity there are two camps of thought, when one wants it to mean something and wait for the right person, and obviously some people don’t care.

“I guess I was in the first category, I wasn’t looking for the man I was going to marry, but I wanted something that wasn’t going to be a one night stand, a connection more than sex. I guess I just never found the right person.”

Continue reading “Millennial Explains Why She’s Still A Virgin at 27 Years Old: “It’s Partly Circumstance, It’s Partly Choice’”

Thoughts on the NRO Essay “Advice For Incels” by Kevin D. Williamson

Thoughts on the NRO Essay “Advice For Incels” by Kevin D. Williamson

About me and this blog:

If you are new to my blog: I have been a conservative my entire life. I’ve never voted Democrat. I was a Republican until a few years ago. I am no longer in any political party.

I sometimes critique secular, left wing feminists on my blog (such as but not limited to (Link): this post and (Link): this one), but there are times when I believe other conservatives get feminists wrong, and feminists are actually correct on some issues.

I was brought up in a traditional values, conservative, Christian family where my parents brought me to Southern Baptist churches as I was growing up, where I was taught to believe in gender complementarianism, which I did for many years, until I finally realized how (Link): wrong and sexist complementarianism is.

Because I grew up as a complementarian, I am quite familiar with what they think and why they think as they do.

My current religious beliefs are somewhat “up in the air,” as I am waffling between being agnostic, (or a deist), and the Christian faith. (Note: I am not an atheist.)

I am by no means anti- Nuclear Family, anti- motherhood, or anti- marriage, though I do posit that many to most conservatives – especially the religious ones – have gone to un-biblical lengths and have turned the Nuclear Family, marriage, natalism, and motherhood and fatherhood into idols which is wrong of them.

— end introduction to me and this blog —

I saw a link to this essay go through my Twitter feed today:

(Link): Advice for Incels by Kevin D. Williamson

On one level, this essay – “Advice for Incels” was okay.

However, I think that while the guy who wrote it has his heart in the right place, I think he gets a lot of things wrong and is naive about how Baptist and conservative Protestant and evangelical churches are for adult singles.

I’ve spent the last several years on this blog covering these topics – I’d encourage Williamson and anyone who read his NRO piece to read the books  (Link): “Singled Out” by Field and Colon and  “Quitting Church” by Christian author Julia Duin for even more information.

Continue reading “Thoughts on the NRO Essay “Advice For Incels” by Kevin D. Williamson”

Who Are “Incels” (Involuntary Celibates)? Behind the Misogynistic Ideology That Inspired The Toronto Suspect by T. Merrigan

Who Are “Incels”? Behind the Misogynistic Ideology That Inspired The Toronto Suspect

Much farther below, in this post: link to an article hosted on The Lily, about Alex Minassian, who was apparently influenced by online “incel” (women-hating) groups.

I’ve actually already done a post or two about these misogynists before, such as (Link): this one – they refer to themselves as “Involuntary Celibates” and blame women for their problems and lives, rather than taking responsibility for themselves. (They also like to live in a fantasy world where women have lives so much easier than men, and, women are supposedly to blame for the problems of men.)

These bitter men exude hatred of women but then have the audacity to bleat on Reddit threads and elsewhere that “women don’t like nice guys,” and they cannot comprehend how it is no woman wants to date or have sex with a “nice guy” (who is actually a big, sexist, woman-hating jerk) such as themselves.

It’s no mystery – well, not to the rest of us.

One problem of posting about these sexist douche canoes is that they will at times want to leave a comment under any posts you make about them.

According to some of these articles I’ve read about Incels, they celebrate every time an Incel kills women. If Incels kill all the women, there won’t be any women for them to have a chance of having sex with – they’d have to have sex with other men.

Other than being immoral, killing women is counter-productive to their goals of having sex with a real living woman. But I guess not only do they lack in looks, incels also aren’t very intelligent.

Continue reading “Who Are “Incels” (Involuntary Celibates)? Behind the Misogynistic Ideology That Inspired The Toronto Suspect by T. Merrigan”

Annie Murphy’s Sex and Relationship Column Gives Some Fantastic Advice About “Losing Your Virginity” by Princess Weekes

Annie Murphy’s Sex and Relationship Column Gives Some Fantastic Advice About “Losing Your Virginity” by Princess Weekes

In my several years of blogging here about sexually related topics – celibacy and virginity included – this is only about the third or fourth article I’ve seen by liberals (this site I quote below, The Mary Sue, leans left) discouraging “virgin shaming,” and encouraging women to remain virgins if they want to.

Respecting virginity is very rare these days – virginity usually gets mocked – and this is especially true of liberal feminists, but even right wingers and conservative Christians are pretty bad about this subject.

I’ve never understood how “sex positive” feminists can hold such a double standard – they run about insisting that culture respects any and all female decisions regarding sex, but they always make an exception regarding virginity. Like (Link): this, for example. Many “sex positive” feminists are just fine with ridiculing women who are virgins by choice.

(Link):  Annie Murphy’s Sex and Relationship Column Gives Some Fantastic Advice About “Losing Your Virginity”

by Princess Weekes

Feelings about sex and virginity are very individualized. Everyone matures at a different level, and even though we claim to live in a sex-positive era, there is still a level of judgment when it comes to people who are virgins.

Continue reading “Annie Murphy’s Sex and Relationship Column Gives Some Fantastic Advice About “Losing Your Virginity” by Princess Weekes”

Pupils Should Be Taught in School that Abstinence and Celibacy are ‘Positive Life Choices’, says Church of England

(Link): Pupils Should Be Taught in School that Abstinence and Celibacy are ‘Positive Life Choices’, says Church of England

Excerpts:

by E. Busby

‘Relationships and sex education should be rooted in the teachings of the Church – including the understanding of marriage as context for sexual relationships’

Schools should teach pupils that abstinence and celibacy are “positive life choices”, the Church of England has said.

Continue reading “Pupils Should Be Taught in School that Abstinence and Celibacy are ‘Positive Life Choices’, says Church of England”

Study (from 2016) Claims Pre-Marital Virginity is Now ‘Antiquated’ – Is Virginity No Longer Virtuous?

Study (from 2016) Claims Pre-Marital Virginity is Now ‘Antiquated’ – Is Virginity No Longer Virtuous?

I’ve said this numerous times on this blog, but both within Christianity and in secular culture, all sexual preferences and behaviors are tolerated these days (including asexuality), except for hetero adults who choose to remain virgins or celibate.

I don’t recall seeing anything about this study before, and we’re in 2018. I have no idea how over a year has gone by and this story or study never crossed my radar previously – not that I remember.

Not only do I lack sexual experience, but bonus!, I also lack sexually transmitted diseases, genital crabs, I’ve saved a fortune in not paying for lots of birth control, I’ve never had unwanted pregnancies, and I’ve avoided guys using me for sex only to kick me to the curb right after, all thanks to NOT fooling around.
(Nobody ever seems to count or appreciate the positives of being a virgin past one’s 20s.)

Many people are still confusing having sexual activity with being an adult. I’m in my 40s, have never had sex, but I’m an adult. People need to stop assuming it’s necessary to have sexual intercourse at some stage to reach adulthood, maturity, or what have you.

Realize that American culture asks or expects each of us to respect sexuality in any and all its forms, including pre-martial sex, bisexuality, homosexual behavior – but the groups who ask and expect this toleration or celebration never the less refuse to respect the choice by anyone to remain a virgin over the age of 30.

Adult virginity and adult celibacy are the two choices that un-nerve, anger, and confuse the pro-sex types. (And, by the way, I don’t consider myself “anti sex” merely because I was waiting until marriage to have sex.)

Before I get to the rebuttal piece, here is an article about the study, with some excerpts:

(Link): Has virginity lost its virtue?

By Megan Scudellari  / MAY 09, 2016

Throughout history, virginity has been a prized quality before marriage. But though it would come as no surprise to many people, the times are a-changin’: A new look at sexual inexperience in the modern age suggests virginity in America has lost its virtue.

Continue reading “Study (from 2016) Claims Pre-Marital Virginity is Now ‘Antiquated’ – Is Virginity No Longer Virtuous?”

Let’s Rethink Sex by C. Emba

I agreed with much of this editorial by Emba (posted much farther below) and don’t have a problem with it.

I’m a right winger. Imagine my surprise a while back when I was visiting a right wing political blog on which one of the blog owners criticized this editorial by Emba.

From what I can recall, the conservative author found Emba’s cry for the public to take sex more seriously and not sleep around so much, to be unrealistic or too stuffy, too… whatever.

I was appalled that a conservative author on a conservative site (the same author has claimed in previous blog posts on other topics to be a Christian) would be attacking a well-reasoned editorial pointing out that perhaps the avalanche of sexual harassment stories we’ve all been seeing in the media in the realms of Hollywood, sports, politics and more, can be due to people having an “anything goes” mentality towards sex. I agree with her.

Before seeing this editorial a few weeks ago, I was thinking of writing one similar to it myself (and still may).

I would fully expect the majority of liberals out there – especially the feminists – to mock the notion of being chaste or more deliberate about when, if, where, and with whom to have sex, but a conservative? (Liberal feminists (Link): have already done so before, as a matter of fact.)

Maybe I should not be surprised.

I’ve been posting stories to this blog off and on for around the last seven years, and I’ve seen several instances of conservative Christians who have a “meh, who cares, it’s just fornication, go ahead and do it, sex is no biggie” attitude that one would expect to see from some Non-Christians or from liberal feminists.

But the conservatives and Christians go along with this sort of thinking as well.

Continue reading “Let’s Rethink Sex by C. Emba”